Entertainment
Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu Results & Report! (7/4/24)
Time is of the essence.
The Legend of Zelda: The Ring of Destiny, Chapter 60
HPW reaches Termina Velocity, and time is short! It’s another Beat The Clock Challenge, but also, a CARNIVAL OF TIME MATCH for THE Termina title! Whose time is it? And whose time is just up?
OFFICIAL RESULTS
- HPW World Trios Championships Contender’s Match: Fin Balure w/ Arrow Club VS Groose w/ TSDQ; Groose wins and TSDQ will challenge Arrow Club for the titles.
- Beat the Clock Challenge 1: Aveil VS Taros Blanco; Aveil wins.
- Beat the Clock Challenge 2: Yunobo VS Iron Knuckle; Yunobo wins.
- Beat the Clock Challenge 3: Ghirahim VS Kage; Kage wins and will challenge Link for the HPW Triforce World Championship at Treasure Island.
- HPW Termina Championship Carnival of Time Match: Ganon VS Majora; Ganon wins and retains the title.
PLAY BY PLAY
HPW and HXS TV set the scene!
Time has come today. Young hearts can go their way. Can’t put it off another day. HPW don’t care what others say. There will be THREE Beat the Clock Challenges, but no one knows who is facing who! The wrestlers will learn at the same time the fans learn, and that is when the music hits! But either way, only one can be the NEW #1 Contender to the Undisputed HPW Triforce World Championship, their golden ticket taking them to Treasure Island in August. We’ll all be counting the seconds, but who will come in first in this race against time?
Speaking of time, Ganon brings the HPW Termina Championship back to Termina, having held onto this title for well over a year now! But Majora is determined to destroy him, end the reign and doom Termina to a true reign of terror! It will be in a classic match style from Termina Championship Wrestling history, The Carnival of Time! Six rounds, three minutes each, and the first to two falls wins it all! Will the Gerudo Ace survive his own gamble? Or will the Masked Monster end him quickly and painfully?
But first, while Wrestling Is Life and The Studly Don’t Quit, Arrow Club is itching for a fight! They were just trying to “help” Yunobo win the world title, but TSDQ didn’t trust it, and now the leaders of each group will have it out on behalf of the crews! Will the Zora Rock ‘n’ Rolla wash away the Skyfall Stud? Or will Groose punch his golden ticket with the Right Hand o’ The Goddess? HPW Termina Velocity on the Great Bay Coast starts now!
HPW World Trios Championships Contender’s Match: Fin Balure w/ Arrow Club VS Groose w/ TSDQ!
A singles match is definitely a unique way to determine who challenges a trio for their titles, but this will hopefully keep the chaos and shenanigans to a minimum. Will Groose be leading his studly faction on a trip to Treasure Island? Or will their chances go out with the tide?
The bell rings and the fans rally up. They duel, “Let’s Go, Balure!” “Let’s Go, Groose!” The two circle, feel things out, and they tie up collar ‘n’ elbow. Groose uses his size for leverage and he powers Fin to ropes. The ref calls for the ropebreak, Groose lets off slowly, and the fans cheer his sportsmanship. Fin storms up, they tie up again, but Fin can’t push Groose back! Groose pushes Fin back to the ropes, the ref counts the break, and Groose lets off again. Fin is frustrated, the two circle, and they tie up again. Groose starts powering Fin back again but Fin turns it around to put Groose on ropes. Fin grins, but then Groose turns it back on him!
The ref counts, Groose lets off, and the fans applaud. But then Fin SLAPS Groose! Groose scowls at Fin, storms up, but Fin uses the ropes as defense now! The ref backs Groose off, and then Fin runs up to get a headlock. Fin grinds the hold, Groose endures, and the fans continue to duel. Groose powers up and out, then runs Fin over! The fans cheer, Groose flexes, but Fin gets up in a huff. Fin CHOPS, and CHOPS, and CHOPS again! Fin whips Groose to a corner but Groose reverses. Groose runs in, Fin goes up and out to the apron! Groose hits buckles, then Fin GAMANGIRIS! Groose staggers and Fin climbs up!
The fans rally up, Fin leaps, but Groose BODY SHOTS him! Fin flips over from the punch and Arrow Club stresses out. Groose pushes Fin down for a cover, ONE! Fin is tougher than that but Groose clamps on with a chinlock. Now Groose grinds Fin down and Fin endures. The fans rally, Fin fights up, and Fin throws body shots. Groose hits a headlock takeover, and he grinds Fin down again. Fin pushes forearms into Groose’s face, the ref reprimands, but Fin pushes Groose into the headscissors. Groose tries to kip free but he can’t really kip up all that well in the first place… Arrow Club laughs but TSDQ coaches Groose.
Groose moves around, turns Fin over, and then rolls backwards to have the legs for a SAND CRAB! The fans fire up, Fin endures, and now Arrow Club freaks out! Fin reaches out, scrambles forward, and has the ROPEBREAK! Groose lets go right away and the fans cheer. Fin is frustrated as he stands up and shakes out his legs, and he resets with Groose again. They approach, but Fin gets around and CLUBS Groose on the back! And CLUBS him again! Fin bumps Groose off buckles, then climbs up. The fans are torn as Fin rains down fists! The fans still count along, and Fin goes all the way to TEN! Fin then hops down and whips corner to corner.
Fin runs in corner to corner, and CHOPS! The fans “WOO~!” and Fin whips corner to corner again. Fin runs in, but Groose runs out to LARIAT! The fans fire up while both men are down! Groose rises first and he waits on Fin. Groose JABS! JABS! And JABS! The fans chant “GROOSE! GROOSE! GROOSE!” with each JAB! Groose then winds up, but Fin ducks the Right Hand! Fin comes back, and SLINGBLADES! The fans fire up as Fin aims at Groose from a corner. Groose rises, Fin runs in, but Groose avoids the dropkick! Fin writhes from his crash landing, and Groose goes after Fin’s arms! Fin fights the chicken wings, wrenches around to a hammerlock, then headlocks again.
Groose back suplexes free but Fin lands out of it! Fin dodges Groose’s lariat, comes back, but Groose slips through the slingblade! Groose reels Fin in for a BIG back suplex! Cover, TWO! The fans fire up while Arrow Club breathes easy again. TSDQ coaches Groose and he brings Fin up. Groose fireman’s carries Fin but flails, gets free, trips Groose, and DOUBLE STOMPS! Cover, TWO! Fin is frustrated but the fans fire up as Groose stays in this. Fin sits Groose up to drive in elbow after elbow after elbow. Then Fin clamps on a chinlock and grinds Groose into the mat. Groose endures and the fans rally up again.
Groose fights up, throws body shots, and he backs Fin down to ropes. Groose powers up and out, then back drops Fin! The fans fire up while Fin flounders back to ropes. Groose runs up to clothesline Fin up and out! The fans fire up more, and now Arrow Club and TSDQ shout at each other. The ref tells them all to stay back, Fin gets to his feet and he gets on the apron. Fin is wary of TSDQ, but Groose gets him on the ropes! The fans fire up again, for BEATS OF THE THUNDER DRUM! The fans count along as Groose goes all the way to TEN! Fin sputters and stumbles but Groose brings him back into the ring.
Groose chicken wings the arms, turns Fin, but Torbevito gets on the apron! The ref reprimands Torbevito, but then Skull Kid YANKS Torbevito down! The fans cheer, Ruto storms up on Skull Kid but Ladrona steps to her! Only for Scaly to step up behind Ruto…! The ref reprimands and tells them all to back up, but Groose lets Fin go to WRECK Scaly with a dropkick! Ruto checks Scaly, Groose high-fives Ladrona and Skull Kid, but then Fin drags Groose backwards into a dragon sleeper! BLOODY SUNDAY! Cover, TWO! “This is Awesome!” but Fin stomps Groose down. Fin drags Groose into the drop zone, then goes to a corner.
The fans rally as Fin climbs up and takes aim. COUP DE- NO, Groose moves! Fin lands on his feet but a leg jams up! Fin hobbles and turns around, into the RIGHT HAND O’ THE GODDESS!! Fin sputters while his legs go limp, but Groose chicken wings the arms! The Ducks get on the apron but Tingle runs up to HIP ATTACK Mack into Rick! The fans fire up, Groose says, “Nice!” then hits the LOFTWING DRIVER!! Cover, GROOSE WINS!
Winner: Groose, by pinfall (TSDQ are the NEW #1 Contenders to the HPW World Trios Championships)
The Studly Don’t Quit, and they have each other’s backs as the team helps The Skyfall Stud pull out the victory! The four stand together, but which combination of three is going to be going after Fin & The Ducks on Treasure Island?
Beat the Clock Challenge 1: ??? VS ???
It’s time for the first of these double blind match-ups! HPW promised to find six worthy candidates, so who made the cut? First out is… AVEIL! The Desert Flower of the Gerudo Sisterhood was a finalist in this year’s Triforce Tournament, could this be her redemption? And her opponent is… TAROS BLANCO! Aveil’s gonna mess with the bull, will she get the horns?
The bell rings, the clock is ticking, and the two rush right up to tie up. They’re in a deadlock, but then Blanco uses his height for leverage. Blanco puts Aveil on the ropes, the ref counts, but Blanco quickly arm-drags Aveil away! Aveil stands right back up while fans fire up. Blanco runs up, Aveil dodges the lariat and runs the ropes to tilt-o-whirl RANA! The fans fire up again while Blanco gets back to his feet. Aveil runs up and DROPKICKS Blanco out of the ring! The fans fire up with Aveil, and then she takes aim. Aveil builds speed and DIVES! Direct hit at the ramp and the fans fire up even more!
Aveil hurries to get Blanco up and into the ring. Aveil goes up a corner, but Blanco gets up to GAMANGIRI! Aveil falls to the apron, Blanco builds speed now, and he DROPKICKS Aveil off the apron! The fans are torn while Aveil writhes, but Blanco goes out to fetch her. Blanco whips Aveil hard into barriers! The fans over there boo as Blanco storms up on Aveil. Blanco stomps away on Aveil, but the ref’s ring count climbs. Blanco slides in but then slides out, refreshing the count. Aveil is up, and Blanco CHOPS her! The fans “WOO~!” and Blanco puts Aveil back in. Blanco storms up, brings Aveil up, but Aveil throws body shots.
Blanco CLUBS Aveil on the back, whips her to ropes, but Aveil goes up and over him! Aveil whips, Blanco reverses, but now Aveil springboards to CROSSBODY! Cover, TWO! Aveil hurries to waistlock but Blanco fights the lift. Blanco switches, Aveil switches, repeat. The fans fire up as the two go around and around with the standing switches, then Aveil finally GERMAN SUPLEXES! Bridging cover, TWO! The fans fire up while both Aveil and Blanco dizzily stagger to their feet. Blanco takes a swing but misses wide left, but so does Aveil. They stumble into each other, and Blanco HEADBUTTS Aveil down! Cover, TWO!
The fans fire up again as Blanco shakes out the stars. Blanco drags Aveil up, CHOPS her, and Aveil staggers to a corner. Blanco storms up to CHOP again and fans “WOO~!” Blanco sits Aveil down, then goes corner to corner. Blanco runs back in, jumps, but it’s just a fake out so he can BOOT Aveil in the face! Blanco rolls back to tranquilo pose! The fans are torn, but then Blanco gets up, runs back in, only for Aveil to slip out to the apron! Blanco stops himself, takes a swing, but Aveil ducks to GAMANGIRI! Blanco staggers back, Aveil springboards to CROSSBODY! Aveil bounces off the cover but takes aim at Blanco.
Blanco stands, Aveil fires off fast hands and kicks, then SOBATS! Aveil runs, but into an OVERHEAD BELLY2BELLY! The fans are torn while Aveil tumbles out of the ring. Blanco slides out after Aveil, CLUBS her on the back, then tells cameramen to move. Blanco whips Aveil at the barriers, but Aveil reverses! Blanco hits the barriers, then Aveil runs up to CALF KICK him against them! The fans fire up, Aveil POSTS Blanco, then pushes him into the ring. Aveil stalks Blanco as he stands back up, and she full nelsons! DESERT- NO, Blanco slips out the back of the nelson, then shoves her at the ref!
Aveil stops from running into the ref, but Blanco rolls Aveil up! With tights!! TWO!! Aveil escapes as Blanco tries to cheat her! Aveil runs up, Blanco gets around, GERMAN SUPLEX, but Aveil lands out! Aveil runs up to SPIKE-RANA! Cover, TWO!! Blanco survives but the fans fire up again. Aveil drags Blanco into a drop zone, steps on him as she heads for the corner then climbs up. Aveil MOONSAULTS, but onto Blanco’s knees! Blanco saves himself in time, and gets up as Aveil sputters and writhes. Aveil sits up, into a PENALTY KICK! Cover, TWO! Blanco is frustrated and he drags Aveil up to a fireman’s carry.
Blanco aims for a corner, heads that way, but Aveil slips free! O’Conner Roll, with bridge! AVEIL WINS!!
Winner: Aveil, by pinfall
Blanco is stunned, but after a fast ‘n’ furious fight, Aveil snatches the victory in the blink of an eye! The official time comes in at 9 minutes, 7 seconds! Not that quick but not that long, either. Will either of the next match-ups match this pace? Or will the Desert Flower return to Treasure Island?
Beat the Clock Challenge 2: ??? VS ???
The bar has been set, and and now the next two competitors must win this in under nine minutes! But who is getting the chance? First out, it’s… YUNOBO! The “Macho Goro” fell short just a few weeks ago in the steel cage match, but he’s still in the title chase! His opponent? IRON KNUCKLE! These are two big, BIG men, will either be able to end this quickly?
The bell rings, we’re counting down, and the two RAM into each other! Yunobo pushes Knuckle, Knuckle ROCKS Yunobo! Knuckle fires more forearms, backs Yunobo into the corner, and he fires off fast hands! The fans fire up, the ref counts, and Knuckle lets off to whip corner to corner. Knuckle then runs in to BACK ELBOW, then PELE! The fans fire up as Yunobo staggers. Knuckle reels Yunobo into a clinch, but Yunobo fires elbows! Yunobo throws big forearms, boxing elbows, then winds up, but Knuckle JABS! Knuckle winds up, but Yunobo HEADBUTTS back! Knuckle staggers away to a corner while Yunobo steadies himself.
Yunobo fires up, the fans are torn, but he runs in at Knuckle. But Knuckle catches him for an URENAGE! Cover, ROPEBREAK! Knuckle is annoyed but he drags Yunobo right back up. Knuckle reels Yunobo back in, but Yunobo fights back with an elbow, then a KNEE low! Yunobo reels Knuckle in for a fireman’s carry! Knuckle flails and slips free, ROCKS Yunobo again, then reels him in for a fireman’s carry. T K O! Cover, TWO! Yunobo is still in this and the fans rally up. Knuckle KICKS Yunobo in the back! Yunobo grits his teeth, but Knuckle CHOPS him in the chest. Yunobo glares defiantly up at Knuckle, but then Knuckle PENALTY KICKS him!
Knuckle runs to then drop an elbow! Cover, TWO! Yunobo huffs ‘n’ puffs and gets to his feet. Knuckle CHOPS, fans “WOO~!” but Yunobo just gets angrier! Knuckle throws a forearm, Yunobo throws one back, and the fans fire up as they go back and forth! Yunobo gets the edge, whips, but Knuckle reverses! Yunobo ducks ‘n’ dodges and builds up more speed to CLOBBER Knuckle! The fans fire up with Yunobo while Knuckle tumbles out of the ring! Yunobo goes out to the apron, takes aim and runs, but Knuckle steps aside! Yunobo’s flying shoulder tackle crashes ‘n’ burns on the floor with a belly flop, and the fans fire up!
Knuckle drags Yunobo up, pushes him into the ring, then stalks up behind him. Yunobo sits up, and Knuckle clamps on with the REBONAK CLUTCH! The fans fire up as Yunobo flails and fights to his feet! Yunobo backs up and RAMS Knuckle into a corner! Knuckle holds on, so Yunbo RAMS him in again! Yunobo gets free, gets moving, but Knuckle ELBOWS him down! Both men are down and the fans fire up, but we’re nearing five minutes left! Knuckle rises first, brings Yunobo up, but Yunobo fireman’s carries! Knuckle flails free again, REBONAK- NO, Yunobo snapmares free! Knuckle gets up, but Yunobo fireman’s carries again, GORON DROP!
The fans fire up as Yunobo fires himself up! Yunobo runs for ROLLING THUNDER! Cover, TWO!! Knuckle survives and the fans fire up more but Yunobo hurries to a corner. Yunobo aims, shouts at Knuckle to get up, and Knuckle does rise. Yunobo roars and runs in, but Knuckle dodges and Yunobo runs into buckles! Knuckle then RAMS Yunobo in the corner! Knuckle puts Yunobo up top, tucks him in, and carries him out! But Yunobo gets free of the Muscle Buster! Yunobo gets moving, ducks ‘n’ dodges again, GORE GORO!! Cover, YUNOBO WINS!
Winner: Yunobo, by pinfall
The fans are thunderous! Not only does Yunobo get an upset victory, but he does it in seven minutes, 31 seconds! The Macho Goro has raised the bar, will either of the final two competitors be able to slip through that narrowing window?
Beat the Clock Challenge 3: ??? VS ???
It’s the last round of this challenge, and the pressure is on! Who were selected for this grand opportunity? First out is… GHIRAHIM! The Living Blade was cut off before he could challenge Thunderbird, will he make up for it here? And his opponent… KAGE! Wait, really? Granted, he’s a former Triforce Champion, but with how he interfered in Link’s match back in May, where’s the punishment? Well, he still has to win the challenge. Will the Hero’s Shadow still haunt his brother? Or will seven minutes and 31 seconds not be enough time to punch a ticket to Treasure Island?
The bell rings, the clock is ticking, but Ghirahim wastes time trying to reason with Kage. They’re both Dark Forces now, aren’t they? Maybe they can work out some sort of agreement? Ghirahim wins now, beats Link at Treasure Island, then Kage gets his shot at like Clash of Fates or something. Ghirahim reaches out a hand, but Kage kicks it away! Then he SUPERKICKS Ghirahim! The fans fire up as Ghirahim wobbles, and Kage gets Ghirahim up in the Electric Chair Lift! Kage reaches up but Ghirahim flails and fights his way around to sunset flip! TWO, both men stand up, and Ghirahim’s extra upset now!
Ghirahim swings, Kage dodges, runs and RANAS! Ghirahim tumbles out of the ring as fans fire up more, and Kage builds speed! Kage DIVES, and direct hit! Ghirahim is sent into barriers but Kage hurries to get him back in the ring. Kage aims from the apron, steps inside and COMPLETE SHOTS! Cover, TWO! The fans fire up while Ghirahim scrambles for ropes. Kage hurries to grab Ghirahim’s legs and drags him back! Ghirahim turns, kicks Kage away, then gets up. Kage returns, Ghirahim dodges him and springboards, GHIRA CUTTER! Cover, TWO!! Kage survives and the fans fire up, but Ghirahim hurries to a corner.
Ghirahim takes aim as Kage slowly rises, and then runs in! HIDDEN- NO, Kage ducks the Hidden Blade! Ghirahim hurries to stand back up, but turns around into the MASTER SWORD! Ghirahim wobbles again, and Kage full nelsons to SNAP DRAGON SUPLEX! The fans fire up, Ghirahim flops over, and Kage waits on him. Ghirahim slowly gets back up, and Kage full nelsons again! SNAP DRAGON SUPLEX! Ghirahim sputters as he sits back up, and Kage runs up to MASTER SWORD again! Cover, TWO!! Ghirahim survives, Kage is frustrated, but the fans are thunderous with “This is Awesome!”
Kage aims from a corner now as Ghirahim slowly sits back up. Kage runs in, MASTER- NO, Ghirahim ducks the knee and he rolls Kage up! TWO, and Ghirahim loads up! HIDDEN BLADE to the face!! Cover, TWO?!? Kage shocks everyone by surviving! Ghirahim argues with the ref but the ref says his count was fair! Ghirahim looks at Kage rising up, and he runs the ropes! Springboard and GHIRA CUTTER!! Cover, TWO!?!? Kage survives again and Ghirahim is beside himself! The fans are electric, because we’re already at the two minute warning! Ghirahim goes back to a corner and waits on Kage to stand up.
Ghirahim goes up and up and SUPER GHIRA- NO!! Kage catches Ghirahim into a waistlock! Then he drops Ghirahim into another full nelson, for a third SNAP DRAGON SUPLEX! Ghirahim flounders around, the fans are electric, and we hit the final minute!! Kage stalks Ghirahim to ropes, Ghirahim drags himself up, and Kage then gets up and under him! Electric Chair Lift, tuck and DARK CLOUD DRIVER!! Cover, Kage wins!
Winner: Kage, by pinfall
The crowd goes wild as the Hero’s Shadow takes this one, with 30 SECONDS to spare! That makes it clear who the NEW #1 contender is! Kage has his golden ticket back to the title, but can he take the title back from his brother?
HPW Termina Championship Carnival of Time Match: Ganon VS Majora!
The Dark Forces didn’t do so well at the inaugural Wrestling Is Life, but they did take the UnderWorld Order’s last remaining prize, the Million Rupee Championship. But instead of going after Kevin Gibdo, the Masked Monster went after the Gerudo Ace! Ganon is dusting off a piece of Termina wrestling history to deal with Majora, but will he still be golden after six rounds? Or is Majora going to terminate Termina and Ganon in one go?
Per the rules, each competitor is allowed their “seconds,” their cornermen. While Majora has brought Ted Beedle Ossi, Ganon has brought Wizzro. The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see just whose time it is!
The bell rings and round one begins. The two circle while the fans rally up. They feel things out, tie up, and they’re in a deadlock. They break, go again, and Ganon wrenches an arm. Majora rolls, spins and wrenches in return. Ganon reaches for ropes but Majora keeps him back. Ganon throws body shots, wrenches Majora back, and he wrangles Majora to the mat. Ganon digs a knee into the arm and pulls on it! Majora endures, so Ganon lets off to STOMP the arm! Majora writhes and clutches the elbow while fans rally up. Ganon stalks Majora, grabs the arm and CLUBS it. Majora reaches out and has the ROPEBREAK!
Referee Tiger Sahasrahla counts, Ganon lets off quickly, and he eggs Majora on. Majora storms up, they tie up again, and Ganon headlocks. Majora throws body shots, powers out, and they RAM shoulders! Neither man even budges and the fans rally up. The two talk some smack, Majora runs and they RAM shoulders again! Still neither man falls, and Majora kicks low! Majora headlocks, Ganon powers up and out, but Majora grabs Ganon’s hair! Sahasrahla reprimands but Majora reels Ganon back into the headlock. Ganon lifts Majora, but Majora thrashes around. We’re at the last minute of this first round as Majora grinds Ganon with the hold.
Ganon powers up, powers out this time, and he runs Majora over! The fans fire up, but Majora’s right back on his feet! Majora runs Ganon over! Majora roars but the fans boo, and Ganon is back on his feet! Ganon kicks Majora low, whips, but Majora reverses, only for Ganon to run him over again! The fans fire up while Majora scrambles to ropes. Ganon storms up, CLUBS Majora, and then CLUBS him again and again. Sahasrahla counts, Ganon lets off at 4, and we’re at 30 seconds. Ganon wants after Majora but he’s using ropes for defense. Sahasrahla has Ganon stay back, and then Majora sucker punches him!
The fans boo, Majora reels Ganon in, GERMAN- NO, Ganon kicks and flails to fight the suplex! Ganon switches, but now Majora fights the lift! We’re under 20 seconds, Majora arm-drags free! Ganon gets up, Majora runs in, but Ganon dodges him! Majora runs into buckles, Ganon BOOTS him down! TEN seconds, Ganon goes corner to corner to CANNONBALL! Ganon drags Majora to a cover, TWO! And time’s up!
Ganon: 0; Majora: 0
The fans cheer, Ganon backs off to his corner and Majora rolls away to his. They get a refresher period, but clearly Ganon is in better shape. Though, Majora’s in a worse mood. Sahasrahla signals and the bell rings for round two!
The two storm up, tie up, and Ganon powers Majora right to ropes. Sahasrahla counts, Majora pushes Ganon back and they go around the ring. Then they end up back on ropes, Sahasrahla counts again, and Majora whips Ganon. Ganon ducks ‘n’ dodges but Majora dodges the lariat to waistlock. Ganon fights off another German Suplex, standing switches, but Majora backs him into a corner! Sahasrahla counts, but Majora throws back elbow after back elbow! Sahasrahla reprimands and Majora lets off, but then he mule kicks Ganon! The fans boo, Sahasrahla reprimands more, but Majora just brings Ganon around, to POST him!
The fans boo more as Majora goes out to the apron. Sahasrahla reprimands but Majora lines up a shot. Majora runs up, but Ganon avoids Majora’s boot! Majora hobbles from kicking the post, and Ganon runs to BOOT Majora down! Majora flounders on the floor while fans fire up. Ganon hurries out after Majora, and SMACKS him off the commentary desk! Rusl holds onto his drink as Ganon SMACKS Majora off the desk again and again and again! Sahasrahla starts the ring count, Ganon brings Majora around, APRON BACK SUPLEX! Ganon shoves Majora into the ring, covers, TWO! Majora is still in this but Ganon stays cool.
Ganon clamps onto Majora with a chinlock and he grinds Majora down. Majora endures, reaches out, but Ganon keeps him from ropes. Majora fights up, throws body shots, then powers up and out. Ganon KICKS the back drop away, reels Majora in and brings him up, but Majora RANAS the bomb away! Ganon staggers up as we’re under a minute, and Majora TACKLES Ganon through the ropes! The two tumble to apron then floor while the fans fire up! Sahasrahla checks on both men and they’re both okay. Sahasrahla returns to the ring to start the count, and Majora stands at 3 of 10. Majora stomps Ganon then leaves him behind.
We’re under 30 seconds, Majora wants the ring count to go faster, because it’d still count as a fall! The count passes 5 of 10 as Ganon drags himself up with the apron skirt. Ganon rolls in at 7, but Majora runs up to basement dropkick him back out! Majora shouts for the count, and we’re at 15 seconds! Sahasrahla starts again, Ganon crawls over to the barriers. We’re under 10 seconds as Ganon drags himself up with the barriers. The count is 8 of 10, Ganon hurries into the ring, and stands up, into a TORPEDO MAJORA!! Cover, TIME’S UP!!
Ganon: 0; Majora: 0
The fans are thunderous and Majora is furious as Ganon is saved by the bell! Majora argues with Sahasrahla but Sahasrahla tells Majora there’s nothing he can do about the clock. Wizzro does his best to drag Ganon back to their corner while the refresher period is on. Wizzro splashes Ganon with some water and Ganon is awake. Ganon gets mad, gets to his feet, and the fans fire up as we start round three!
Majora runs up to BODY CHECK Ganon! The fans boo while Majora covers, TWO!! Ganon survives but Majora is furious! Majora drags Ganon up, puts him in a corner and fires forearms. The fans boo and Sahasrahla reprimands, but Majora runs corner to corner and back again! Ganon dodges the splash in the corner, comes back, KICK OF CALAMITY!! Cover, Ganon scores!!
Ganon: 1; Majora: 0
The fans are thunderous again as Ganon ends things in just 15 SECONDS! He tells off Majora before going to his corner, and now it’s Beedle who has to drag Majora to the corner. Majora is dazed but Beedle slaps him back into this, and now we’re into round four!
Majora snarls as he slowly circles with Ganon. They approach, feel things out, and Majora ROCKS Ganon with a forearm! Ganon staggers, Majora keeps after him with more and more forearms! Majora whips, but only to trip Ganon onto ropes, then he KICKS ropes to jam Ganon up! That feels like a combo Skull Kid used to use! Majora runs while Ganon sputters, and he CLOBBERS Ganon again! The fans boo while Majora fires up! Ganon stands, Majora runs back in to CLOBBER him again! Majora gets Ganon up to scoop, aims for a corner and runs in, to RAM Ganon into buckles! Then he runs to STAMPEDE POWERSLAM!
The fans boo but Majora roars as he goes to a corner. Majora takes aim, Wizzro shouts to Ganon, but Ganon stands up, TORPEDO- SPINEBUSTER!! Ganon catches Majora in time to turn things around, and the fans are thunderous again! Both men are down, so Sahasrahla starts a standing count. Majora stirs at 4 of 10, then slowly sits up. Majora manages to stand at 6, but Ganon kips right up! The fans fire up and Majora is pissed! Majora takes a swing, but Ganon gets around to NECKBREAKER! And another kip up! Ganon roars and the fans fire up as he goes to a corner. Ganon aims at Majora, but then Beedle gets on the apron!
The fans boo, Ganon glares at Beedle, but Wizzro runs up to YANK Beedle down! The fans cheer as Wizzro pushes Beedle down, but Majora runs in to SPLASH Ganon at the corner! Majora then reels Ganon in, lifts him up, PILEDRIVER!! Cover, Majora scores!
Ganon: 1; Majora: 1
It took Majora two minutes in the fourth, but he finally scores, and now we’re all tied up! Ganon clutches his neck as he returns to his corner, and Majora stays fired up as he aims from the corner. Ganon gets to his feet, and round five begins!
Ganon hobbles forward while Majora storms up. Majora swings but Ganon bobs ‘n’ weaves, to then BODY BLOW! Majora coughs and sputters while he staggers away. Ganon snarls as he again clutches his neck. Ganon kicks Majora low, reels him in to underhook, but Majora wrenches out! Majora BOOTS Ganon, and he holds on to the wristlock! Majora BOOTS Ganon again, and again! The fans boo but Ganon is getting mad! Majora BOOTS again, and again, but then Ganon reels Majora in for a LARIAT! The fans fire up as Ganon drags Majora up, and he short arm LARIATS again! Ganon is seething while he stands over Majora.
Ganon drags Majora up again, wrenches, knees low, and underhooks, DEMISE DRIVER! Cover, TWO?!? Majora survives and Ganon seethes more but the fans fire up! Ganon drags Majora up, reels him in, but Majora fights the lift! Majora goes to Hebra Lift but Ganon fights that! They go back and forth, Majora powers through to Hebra Lift! But Ganon sunset flips! TWO, and the two scramble to their feet. Majora UPPERCUTS Ganon and he staggers away. Majora RAMS Ganon into the corner, then hurries to put him up top! Majora climbs to join Ganon, but Ganon throws hands! The fans fire up, but Majora hits Ganon back!
Majora CLUBS Ganon, CLUBS him again, then stands on the very top! The fans boo but Majora flips them all off. But then Ganon SHOVES Majora off the top! Majora hits barriers and fans lose their minds! Ganon gets down off the corner and goes after Majora. We’re under a minute as Ganon drags Majora up. Ganon fireman’s carries Majora, goes up steel steps to get back on the apron, and then he goes back up the corner! The fans are freaking out, “Please Don’t Die! Please Don’t Die!” We’re also under 30 seconds! But then Majora slips down to stand on the top rope with Ganon! Majora and Ganon start throwing hands!
The fans are going nuts, and Ganon gets the edge! Ganon clinches Majora, for a SUPER DRAGONFLY!! Both men crash down on the mat and the fans lose their minds! Time is ticking away as Sahasrahla checks both men. He starts a standing count. Neither man stirs until 5 of 10, and by then we’re at 10 seconds left! Ganon looks over, spots Majora, and crawls to the cover! BUT TIME’S UP AGAIN!!
Ganon: 1; Majora: 1
The fans are electric as this has to go to the sixth and final round! Ganon is confused, he thought the bell was for his win. Sahasrahla explains that no, time ran out beforehand. Ganon is frustrated again, and both he and Majora need help getting back to their corners. The fans are thunderously proclaiming, “This is Awesome! This is Awesome!” while Ganon and Majora slowly stand back up. They glare at each other from across the ring, and they start getting fired up again! They start shouting at each other to bring it on! They both want to end this, and the fans are also whipped into a frenzy!
The bell rings and the two rush right in!! KICK OF CALAMITY HITS FIRST!!! Ganon covers, GANON WINS!!!
Winner: Ganon, by pinfall (still HPW Termina Champion)
The fans are going absolutely bonkers! The first Carnival of Time in literal decades, and while it goes to the sixth round, it also ends in the blink of an eye! Majora put everything he had into that fight, how much more must he give to hold gold in HPW?
As for Ganon, he catches his breath, chugs a bottle of water, and then holds up his belt triumphantly. The fans cheer and Wizzro fetches Ganon a mic. Ganon thanks Wizzro, grimaces a bit, and says, “Forgive me, but uh… I mean, you saw that guy try and crunch my neck like a beer can, right?” The fans laugh and cheer, and Wizzro fetches an icepack. Ganon thanks him again, and he holds the pack to his neck while he continues. “I wanted to honor TCW with this match, I hope I did that. Though, if I knew it’d hurt this bad from head to toe after, I probably wouldn’t have bothered.” The fans laugh again.
Ganon continues, “But the pain is worth it, so long as I keep this title. It’s worth it, so long as Termina has a champion they can be proud of!” The fans cheer that! Ganon then says, “This icepack is nice and all, but I’m gonna need ice in a glass, with some whiskey or something.” The fans cheer that, too! Ganon says, “See you at the bar! Cheers, everybody!” Mic drop and the streamers fly, the Gerudo Ace is ready to party hard! But who will step up to him once Treasure Island comes around?
My Thoughts:
Got this one done with time to spare, and that’s not just a pun. The tricky parts of writing a timed match is nailing down the ratio of text to minutes. The Carnival of Time being a Heritage Cup style match, I just kinda took from matches I’ve covered and used that as a template. Treasure Island is gearing up with the Trios match set, as well as yet another match of Link VS Kage. Though, I feel like something might need to go sideways on that given how Kage’s been behaving.
About Chairshot Radio Network
Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!
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TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends
Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5
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Bandwagon Nerds
Bandwagon Nerds #268: Seasons Geekings
Your favorite Nerds invite you to the greatest Holiday Party in the Nerdosphere! That plus a review of the first trailer for James Gunn’s Superman!
Christmas Week is here and the Nerds invite you to the greatest Holiday Party of all-time! In a very special Episode, the Nerds were tasked with a fun endeavor: Plan a Holiday Party featuring characters from the vastness of the Nerdosphere and then, once the planning was done, tell their fellow Nerds how the party unfolded. The guys let their imaginations run wild and tell you all about it on this Episode. Who had too much Holiday Nog? Who brought the best gifts? Who brought the worst? What band or DJ was hired to entertain the guests? It is a Holiday celebration like no other here on BWN. Plus, the teaser trailer for James Gunn’s Superman debuted this week and was watched by, well, a lot of people. The guys have many thoughts about their first look into the first movie of the new DCU. Is there a reason to be hopeful? Tune in and find out.
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About Bandwagon Nerds
Join Patrick O’Dowd, David Ungar, PC Tunney, Rey Cash, and DPP as they keep everyone up on all things nerd, and maybe add some new nerds along the way. It’s the Bandwagon Nerds Podcast!
About Chairshot Radio Network
Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!
MONDAY – Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)
TUESDAY – Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)
WEDNESDAY – The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)
THURSDAY – Keeping the news ridiculous… The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)
FRIDAY – DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)
SATURDAY – The Mindless Wrestling Podcast
SUNDAY – The Front and Center Sports Podcast
CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS
Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE’s PPV/PLE history)
TheChairshot.com PRESENTS…IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends
The 5X5 w/ Patrick O’Dowd
Classic POD is WAR
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Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts… Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!
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About Chairshot Radio Network
Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!
MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)
TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)
WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)
THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)
FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)
SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast
SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast
CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS
Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)
TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends
Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5
Classic POD is WAR
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Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
Let’s Go Crazy! Let’s Get Nuts!
HyruleMania 5 approaches, and Kevin Gibdo must defend the Million Rupee Championship against Majora, who has something “special” in mind…
The Wrestling Roulette is spinning.
The wheel sits in a dark room, and the moon is visible through a round window. Majora says, “The moon goes through phases. It shows us different faces. The tides ebb and flow, going high and low, and put us through our paces. You think you can keep gambling? You think you can keep winning? You think you can survive as the wheel keeps spinning? Then let it go round ‘n’ round, round after round, and we’ll see who falls to the ground.” The wheel stops spinning, and lands on SPINNER’S CHOICE! Majora then busts through the wheel and gets right in the camera!
“Luck? Chance? Fate? Order? Chaos? W̸͉͚̫͎͎̎͗H̵͈̼̾̈́͋̅̆O̶͕̱͌͐͆̕ ̵̼̪̔̐̿̽C̶̭̫̉͘A̵̦̔̀̊͑͘Ŗ̸̡͓̘̀Ë̶̟͍̞̗́͒̀́͘͜Ş̵͎̩̹̈́͋̚͜?! What matters is victory and defeat! Controlling what you can control! And I swear that no matter what the wheel gives us, I will take that title from you! I use Spinner’s Choice to declare… MOON MADNESS!! Every three minutes, the wheel will spin and CHANGE match! Could you imagine the possibilities?! It makes my head spin!” And then his head spins!! Majora laughs maniacally, then his head stops so that it’s sideways. “There’s a fine line between genius and insanity. I’m about to cross that line, care to join me?” Majora has set the terms, will Kevin Gibdo succumb to Moon Madness?
My Thoughts:
Here I go again, trying to be really innovative and over the top. I almost thought adding stipulation on top of stipulation would work, but in many cases, there are match types that contradict each other. A peak behind the curtain of kayfabe here where I could just choose the stipulations that don’t do that, but it might also just be easier from a writing standpoint to just do away with contradictions and redundancies and just have this match constantly make left turns into new territory. Get ready for a wild ride on this one!
About Chairshot Radio Network
Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!
MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)
TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)
WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)
THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)
FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)
SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast
SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast
CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS
Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)
TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends
Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5
Classic POD is WAR
Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!
Powered by RedCircle
Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!