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Mitchell’s WWE Monday Night Raw Report! (1/1/18) | The Chairshot
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Mitchell’s WWE Monday Night Raw Report! (1/1/18)

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All images courtesy of the WWE’s official Twitter

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Jason Jordan w/ Seth Rollins VS Cesaro w/ Sheamus; Jordan wins.
  • Bray Wyatt VS Apollo Crews w/ Titus Worldwide; Wyatt wins.
  • Alexa Bliss VS Asuka; Asuka wins.
  • Braun Strowman VS Rhyno VS Heath Slater; Strowman wins.
  • WWE Intercontinental Championship, No Champion’s Advantage: Roman Reigns VS Samoa Joe; Reigns wins and retains the IC Championship.
  • Cedric Alexander & Goldust VS The ‘Zo Train; Alexander & Goldust.
  • Finn Balor & The Club VS Elias & The Miztourage; Finn & The Club win.

PLAY BY PLAY

Raw Women’s Champion, Alexa Bliss, finds Raw GM, Kurt Angle.

A match with Asuka? Seriously? Well, Angle wanted to start 2018 with a Wrestlemania worthy match. But that’s not fair! He’s rewarding Asuka for her bad behavior. Asuka is already in the Royal Rumble, she doesn’t need to beat Alexa tonight. Alexa isn’t going to change Angle’s mind. If she has a problem, settle it in the ring. And be grateful this isn’t a title match, yet.

Kurt Angle heads to the ring!

The Olympic Gold Medalist greets the WWE Universe with “Happy New Year!” Angle looks back on 2017 as one of his greatest years, and promises to make 2018 even better! Three weeks, Raw has its 25th Anniversary which will lead into the Royal Rumble Pay-Per-View. John Cena has declared his entry into the Men’s Royal Rumble, because yes, there’s a Women’s Royal Rumble. Angle guarantees what the Women’s Rumble rules are, the management decided that what’s good for the men is good for the women! Thirty superstars, over-the-top-rope eliminations, and the winner challenges a Women’s Champion at Wrestlemania. Angle hopes Raw wins both Rumbles, but as far as tonight’s Raw– The Bar comes out!

Forget the Rumble and talk about “The travesty” that occurred on Raw last week! The Bar put up their tag team championships against a new team! What kind of crap is that? The Bar hates favoritism, because Angle gave his son a tag team championship match with Seth Rollins as his partner. Then, what came after was too much. For those who missed it, Kurt Angle came out to celebrate with his son and Seth Rollins. Sheamus is sick to his stomach watching such “favoritism”! Jason Jordan doesn’t deserve to be tag team champion, The Bar wants a rematch. ANgle will give them a rematch when Angle says they get it. How convenient! Jason Jordan comes out in person to respond.

If Jordan doesn’t deserve to be champion, then how come he is champion? Miami chants “Whose your daddy? You still suck!” but Jordan ignores it. Angle doesn’t understand favoritism. Jordan’s title shot was based off his track record. Says the daddy’s boy. Jordan and Rollins still earned the titles. And if Cesaro keeps running his “refurbished mouth”, Jordan will give him a new reason to go to the dentist. Angle keeps the peace, because it’s time to settle things in the ring, right now! And to support his tag team championship partner, Seth Rollins appears!

Or rather, he comes out to scold him. See that “pale Irish idiot” with “the stupid looking mohawk”? Jordan, you’re outnumbered, what good would that do their team? They don’t have to get along, but they are going to worry about each other. Rollins tells Jordan not to be self-absorbed. Jordan bragged in front of his dad, so now Rollins has to come out to be in his corner. But Rollins feels he’s only here to watch Jordan lose. At that, Cesaro blindsides Jordan from behind, and Rollins says “see what I mean?” Can the Gold-Blooded Son turn things around once the match actually starts?

 

Jason Jordan w/ Seth Rollins VS Cesaro w/ Sheamus!

Raw returns with this match in action, Cesaro clobbers Jordan with European Uppercuts in a corner. Cesar whips Jordan corner to corner but JJ goes up and over then slips out of a body drop to dropkick the Swiss Cyborg. TWO, JJ keeps on Cesaro with shoulders in a corner. The referee counts, so Jordan moves Cesaro to an adjacent corner. Cesaro blocks the bump and hits back with more EuroUppers. He then gives JJ a snapmare and chinlock to grind him down. Rollins tries to coach JJ back into things. JJ gets up, fans rally while he fights out. Cesaro whips but is reversed, he ducks to springboard, JJ catches him! Jordan rams Cesaro into a corner, then carries him corner to corner for another. He goes corner to corner again, then a fourth time! Jordan fires up but Sheamus distracts him, Cesaro dodges to send Jordan into buckles and chop blocks the bad leg out!

Rollins chases Sheamus off, but the damage is done. Cesaro brings Jordan up for more EuroUppers, body shots, and then a wrench to the bad leg. He even dropkicks that knee against the ropes! Cesaro smacks the leg against the apron edge before giving Sheamus a high-five. He wrenches JJ’s bad leg at the knee, JJ endures the deep hold. Rollins tries to rally for Jordan, Jordan fights his way out and shoves Cesaro away. Cesaro is back on him, EuroUpper to the leg. Jordan crawls to a corner, Cesaro drags him out for an elbow drop and wrench tot he knee. Cesaro digs in an elbow, Jordan endures as he gives Cesaro crossface punches. Cesaro lets go, then brawls with Jordan. Jordan clobbers Cesaro with a lariat, then hobbles to ropes. He dumps Cesaro to the apron then knocks him down, but Cesaro sweeps the leg! Jordan goes down, Cesaro picks him up for a shinbreaker to the apron!

The Bar celebrates while we go to break.

Raw returns, and now Cesaro baseball dropkicks Jordan out of the ring. Rollins can only watch as Jordan writhes. The Architect tries to coach him back, but Cesaro gets Jordan back in the ring. Cesaro gives Jordan another big EuroUpper, then drags him out for a half-crab to the bad leg.

Jordan endures again, Rollins tries to rally the fans. Jordan rolls over and fights back, but Cesaro keeps him down with forearms. Even so, Jordan kicks with his good leg and gets Cesaro away. Rollins likes what he sees, but another EuroUpper rocks Jordan. Cesaro scoops but Jordan slips out then boots Cesaro down. Sheamus choaches Cesaro while Jordan tries a suplex. The leg won’t allow it, but Jordan still has his arms to knocks Cesaro down. Overhead suplex! And another! Jordan covers, TWO! Rollins likes the heart from Jordan as he runs back into Cesaro. Cesaro fights off the back suplex, but ends up in a Northern Lights!

Roll through, a second Northern Lights! TWO! Rollins rallies for Jordan as he limps over to Cesaro, but Cesaro grabs ropes to deny the suplex. He mule-kicks the bad leg, then Sheamus gets a cheap shot, roll-up, TWO! But into the Half-Crab again! Jordan endures, but it becomes a Full Crab to keep Jordan down. Jordan gets the ropebreak nonetheless! Cesaro tries to give Sheamus another opening, but Rollins intercepts and stomps him out! Back-suplex neckbreaker outta nowhere! Jordan wins! The Gold-Blooded Son celebrates because he earned this one. Even Rollins applauds. Can this makeshift team really last as Raw Tag Team Champions?

 

Backstage interview with Roman Reigns.

The Big Dog and Intercontinental Championship has no Champion’s Advantage in his match against Samoa Joe tonight. As far as Roman’s concerned, Samoa Joe got what he deserved last week for injuring Dean Ambrose. In Roman’s eyes, Joe walks and talks like a punk, which is why Roman “punked him out.” This week will get ugly and intense, but all within the rules. “I hope.” Can Roman rein in his temper and continue to reign as champion?

 

Bray Wyatt VS Apollo Crews w/ Titus Worldwide!

The Eater of Worlds has had problems with the WOKEN Wisdom of Matt Hardy, will he use Titus’ #1 client to take out his frustrations?

The bell rings, the two circle while fans chant “DELETE!” They tie up, Bray puts Crews in a corner. He backs off for a clean break but then runs in to swing. Crews dodges, Bray gives his spider-lean! Crews is startled, but Bray comes out to circle with him. Bray swings, Crews dodges to put on a headlock. Bray stomps on a foot then gives Crews an uppercut before stalking him around the ring. Crews is thrown to the apron but kicks Bray down, slingshot senton and elbow drop, TWO! Crews puts on another headlock to keep the Face of Fear down. Bray powers out, swings but misses, so he uses a running headbutt to knock Crews down. Bray keeps on Crews at ropes, choking him on the middle one. The referee backs Bray off, but Bray returns to keep on Crews and mock Titus’ concern. Bray whips Crews corner to corner, Crews goes up and over. Things speed up as Crews shows off more agility, then he drops Bray with a dropkick. Cover, TWO, Crews keeps on Bray with an arm-wrench. He puts Bray in a corner, Bray puts him on the apron. Crews hits back, climbs up, but Bray rocks him with an uppercut. Bray is mad now, he drags Crews out for a draping jawbreaker! Crews gasps for air while Bray smiles and stalks him. Titus Worldwide cheers Crews on, but Bray torments Crews while grinning at Dana Brooke. We go to break.

Raw returns, Bray still controls the match as he grinds Crews with a chinlock. Titus Worldwide gets the fans rallying, Crews stands up but Bray throws him to ropes. Crews dodges, only to run into Bray’s body check! Cover, TWO, but Bray is not bothered. He kicks Crews while he’s down, stalking him to a corner. Bray grinds Crews’ face against the top rope, then whips him to other ropes. Crews catches him with a shotgun dropkick! Both men are down, Titus Worldwide and the fans rally again. Bray and Crews stand up, Crews gets a mule kick and boot, then hits a jumping lariat to Bray on the run. He kip-ups and hits a standing moonsault, TWO! Bray slips out of the ring, Crews fakes him with a slingshot to then mule kick and ASAI Moonsault!

Bray goes down, Titus fires up and coaches Crews. Crews gets Bray in the ring, stalks him but gets that turn-around lariat! Fans fire up as Bray spider-walks, but Dana gets on the apron. Bray locks his eyes on her, Titus says she needs to hop down. Bray scares her off and she falls on Titus!

But Crews hits Bray with an enziguri! Waistlock, but the SISTER ABIGAIL! Bray wins! But WOKEN Hardy speaks to him from the titantron!

“Ye-e-e-e-es~!” Bray, last week saw Hardy turn the Fireflies into WOKEN WARRIORS. He vows to devour Bray’s darkness within the WWE, to make it into light. Bray is a Consumer of Terrestrial Entities, but he won’t escape the WOKEN WISDOM. Matt is all around Bray, he haunts Bray’s dreams. Once Abigail’s powers are no more, Hardy will DELETE Bray! Many Matts appear on screen to laugh at Bray. Will WOKEN Hardy truly have the last laugh on Bray Wyatt?

 

Alexa Bliss finds Nia Jax.

Can Nia be her corner woman? She’s really worried about facing Asuka tonight. Sorry, but Nia has to take care of Enzo Amore, he’s sick with the flu and is “upset” about not being able to defend his title tonight. Seriously? Alexa needs Nia. But- Alexa can’t believe Nia is being like this. It’s either him or her. Nia apologizes, she needs to get Enzo her soup. Alexa can’t believe this insanity! What will happen to The Goddess when she faces the Empress?

 

Alexa Bliss VS Asuka!

One woman made history by being SmackDown and Raw Women’s Champions in the same year, the other by being the Undefeated NXT Women’s Champion for 523 days. Which woman will start 2018 with a win as the Women’s Division looks to make history at the Royal Rumble?

The bell rings, and Alexa is naturally wary of the still undefeated and still dangerous Asuka. They circle, Alexa dodges the grapple and runs to ropes for safety. Asuka lets her come back out and they circle again. Alexa keeps her distance, but Asuka still grabs an arm. Alexa shoves her away, Asuka spins and Alexa narrowly avoids the back hand. She runs to ropes for safety again before circling with Asuka again.

Alexa gets a waistlock but Asuka turns that around to a wristlock. Alexa reverses that to a hammerlock but theN Asuka reverses it back again. They go back and forth, Asuka gets a waistlock takedown to facelock. Fans are on Asuka’s side as she rolls Alexa to a kneebar! The champion scrambles out and the two return to their feet. Alexa tries a takedown but Asuka counters with a chinlock that shifts to a headlock. Alexa throws Asuka off but asuka stands back up and that scares Alexa back to ropes. Asuka grabs a leg, whips but is reversed, Asuka runs Alexa over. Asuka speeds things up then toys with Alexa as she does a little dance. Things speed up again, hip attack knocks Alexa down! Asuka is confident as ever while Alexa gets out of the ring. The Goddess looks afraid and unsure as she meekly returns to ringside. She wants Asuka to stay back as she enters, the referee obliges, but Alexa still scurries out of the ring again. Fans boo the cowardly Goddess, but Alexa wants nothing to do with the Empress at this point. The referee counts while Alexa sheepishly reenters. Asuka is already upon her, snapmare and a kick to the back. Asuka keeps Alexa grounded, Alexa gets back to ropes. The ref backs Asuka off so Alexa can come back, she just kicks and runs away. The fans boo again while we go to break.

Raw returns, Alexa has Asuka in a bodyscissors. Fans rally for Asuka while she endures the squeeze. Asuka pries her way out and goes for an ankle lock! Alexa screams and crawls but Asuka has it on. She crawls and gets the ropebreak, then yanks Asuka into those ropes. Alexa drags Asuka to the post and bends her back.

The ref counts, Alexa lets go at 4. She returns inside the ring, then stalks Asuka before hammering away. Cover, TWO, Alexa’s frustration is boiling over. She drags Asuka up but Asuka fights back with body shots. Roll-up, TWO, Alexa ducks teh buzzsaw to roll Asuka, TWO! Alexa yanks Asuka into a backbreaker! She clobbers Asuka with more hammer fists and even forearm shots. Another cover, TWO, so Alexa brings it back to a bodyscissors. Asuka endures the squeeze again, fans rally for her again. Alexa pulls on Asuka’s hair but Asuka doesn’t give in. Asuka gets moving again, turns around but Alexa turns things into a guillotine hold. Asuka pries her way out of that into the Kimura Lock! Alexa stands up, ropebreak! Alexa kicks at Asuka’s ribs, then puts her in a corner to stomp a mudhole into her. The ref backs Alexa down, Alexa takes aim and runs in for a screaming slap.

Asuka gets mad and slaps back! Alexa shoves Asuka, Asuka fires up, runs and dropkicks Alexa down. Asuka rallies now, whipping Alexa but reversed, Asuka hops up to hit a missile dropkick! Corner to corner hip attack leads to a snapmare and a running low hip attack! Asuka stalks Alexa, grabs her from behind, but Alexa resists and elbows out. Alexa kicks but Asuka deflects for the pop-up knee to the head! Asuka runs in on Alexa, Alexa trise the sunset flip but Asuka sits, TWO! Alexa dropkicks Asuka out of the ring, then stays in to recover. Asuka climbs back up, Alexa grabs her hair, Asuka roundhouses Alexa back. Alexa staggers, Asuka returns and hits the back heel kick. Armbar takedown!

Alexa taps, Asuka wins! The Empress has defeated the Goddess, will she still have a title shot waiting even if she doesn’t win the Rumble?

 

Backstage interview with Samoa Joe.

Now that there is no Champion’s Advantage, the Destroyer doesn’t even have to defeat Roman Reigns in their Intercontinental Championship match. But don’t worry, JOe will still defeat Roman, just like he has every time he’s faced Roman. The world needs to realize Joe owns Roman Reigns, he has “mentally broken” and exposed Roman Reigns. Roman was once a fighting champion, he and The Shield were going to be champions together again. Joe made damn sure The Shield members are never champions together again. Now Ambrose can be a Stay-at-home Husband living off his wife’s paycheck. Renee Young, being Ambrose’s wife, does her best to laugh that one off. Joe continues, saying that because of Joe, Roman is now the kind of man who uses Champion’s Advantage to his advantage. But now, Roman can’t use that, he has run out of options, friends and time. Joe will put Roman to sleep and become the new IC Champion. It may be Roman’s Yard, but it’s Joe’s World. Will he see his words become reality tonight?

 

Braun Strowman VS Heath Slater w/ Rhyno!

The ManBeast wants to show Slater how it’s done, can he survive the Monster Among Men?

The bell rings, the two tie up, Strowman shoves Rhyno to a corner. Fans still chant “E C Dub!” for Rhyno as he comes back out and ties up again. Strowman still shoves Rhyno off and then roars at him. Slater coaches Rhyno, fans cheer Rhyno on. The two tie up, Rhyno gets a headlock but Strowman powers out and knocks him over with one shoulder. Then Strowman boots Rhyno down! Slater gets on the apron, Strowman scares him back but only for a moment. Strowman goes out and grabs a mic. “Look, you’ve got two options, you cheerleader. Either stay on the floor and shut your mouth, or get in the ring and get these hands like your partner!” The fans chant “YES! YES!” for Slater, so Slater gets up on the apron. He stays back, Rhyno attacks, but it does no damage. So Slater joins in and this suddenly becomes a 2v1 Handicap! The Monster Among Men throws Slater off, then powers Rhyno to a corner. Strowman goes corner to corner to squash each man, then easily gives Rhyno the powerslam! Strowman wins!

But he’s not done. Miami wants another, but Slater runs in to save Rhyno. Slater’s heel kick is swatted away, Slater takes the powerslam! Fans are thunderous, they still want more! Rhyno stands up, and takes a second powerslam for himself! The referee begs Strowman stop here, but he won’t, Slater takes a second powerslam! Now Strowman is done. Has Strowman sent a message to The Beast and the Big Red Machine this close to the Royal Rumble’s Universal Championship Triple Threat? Oh wait, ANOTHER POWERSLAM for Slater & Rhyno each!

 

Seth Rollins talks with Roman Reigns backstage.

The Architect hopes The Big Dog is keeping his cool. Roman is, but Joe is proving himself to be a joke with how he runs his mouth. Hopefully Ambrose is watching, because Roman is going to send a message. Both men are champions, let’s keep it that way. Jordan comes in and says on behalf of Rollins, if The Bar appears, they’ll take them out. “Believe that.” Awkward. But, at least they’re all on the same page. Will The Shield still have the Intercontinental Championship when tonight is through?

 

Braun Strowman walks the halls, when he finds Kane.

The Big Red Machine simply wants to talk. He wants to talk about Brock Lesnar. Kane hasn’t faced Lesnar yet, but Strowman has. These two are the “alpha monsters” of the WWE and they can tame the Beast. Kane has a plan, will Strowman hear him out? Strowman doesn’t care about plans, he is THE Alpha Monster. And when Strowman takes out Lesnar, he’ll do it his way. In that case, Kane leaves Strowman be. Will this rejection come back to haunt the Monster Among Men?

 

Kurt Angle is visited by Finn Balor.

The Extraordinary Man wants to personally tell Angle that, as the inaugural Universal Champion, he will go through the Royal Rumble in order to get a shot at that title. Angle is glad to hear it, but he was thinking this was about something else. Oh, tonight’s Six Man Tag. He has partners, in the Good Brothers!

Because otherwise, it’d just be a couple of “NERDS”. The Club is back together to face The Drifter and the Miztourage, can it be just like old times?

 

WWE Intercontinental Championship, No Champion’s Advantage: Roman Reigns VS Samoa Joe!

This rivalry is increasingly personal after what The Destroyer did to the Lunatic Fringe, will this championship match settle things once and for all?

The two men are ready to fight even before the bell, but formal introductions must be made first. Another thing of note is that the referee is the same one from last week’s disqualified match, so he’ll be ready for anything Roman might do. The bell rings and the two rush each other. Joe jabs away on Roman, backing him against the ropes. The ref backs Joe down, Joe comes back to keep on Roman in a corner. Joe brings Roman out, Roman rocks him back with right hands of his own. Roman stomps away, the ref counts and Roman backs off. Fans duel, “Let’s go, Roman!” “Roman sucks!” Roman keeps on Joe as the arena gets loud, but the referee backs him down again. Joe gets Roman with a back suplex in the distraction! Cover, TWO, but Joe keeps his cool. Joe stalks Roman then gives him forearms and a snap suplex.

Roman slips out of the ring for a breather, Joe lets him while we go to break.

Raw returns, Joe has Roman in a cobra clutch. Roman fights his way out, then runs only for Joe to run him over. Cover, TWO, now Joe is frustrated. He stalks the champion, giving him more jabs and even chops. Joe stands Roman up and prepares a suplex but Roman resists, Roman suplexes Joe over! Roman runs at Joe in a corner but Joe dodges and Roman hits buckles. Joe covers, TWO, but Joe keeps his focus. He stomps Roman while he’s down, as well as overhand chops. Joe wrenches Roman’s arm back in a high keylock, Roman endures while fans continue to duel. Roman feeds off a fan rally, getting to his feet and fighting out with big right hands. An uppercut rocks Joe, Roman rallies with clotheslines. Roman whips but Joe wrenches then rocks him with a forearm. Back elbow and Pele! TWO, and Joe is slowly growing frustrated. He looms over Roman at the ropes while fans continue to duel. Joe chokes Roman on the ropes, the referee counts and Joe lets off at 4. Joe brings Roman into a corner and gives him more sharp strikes from those elbows. The referee reprimands Joe, so Joe whips Roman corner to corner hard. Joe grins as he trash talks Roman on the mat.

Joe brings Roman up as fans cheer him on. He whips Roman corner to corner again, just as hard into those buckles. “All day long!” Joe tells Roman. “Remember what I did to Dean?” Joe brings Roman up again and puts him in a seated abdominal stretch. Fans continue to duel, “Let’s go Roman!” “Let’s go Joe!” Joe makes the stretch a half-straitjacket, and Roman fades. Fans rally, Roman revives and fights out with body shots. Joe gives a knee to Roman’s ribs, whips him to the corners again, Roman bounces off to clothesline Joe down! Both men are down, fans rally for them both. Roman crawls over and follows Joe up in a corner. Roman gives Joe those close-range clotheslines, and hits all ten. He runs and boots Joe down, Joe ends up outside the ring.

Roman sees where Joe is, so he slips out and comes around the corner, Drive-By Dropkick! They return into the ring, cover, TWO. Roman and Joe get to their feet, Joe ends up in a corner. Roman throws hands, the referee backs him off, and reminds him there’s no Champion’s Advantage. Joe puts Roman on the apron, forearm, then big body check sends Roman off. Joe runs again, to DIVE! Both men crash down on the outside, the referee starts a ring count. Both men just barely break the count at 9, the match continues but we go to break.

Raw returns again, Joe slaps and headbutts Roman to the mat. Joe circles Roman as he trash talks, then brings Roman up just to knock him down again. Joe toys with Roman, Roman dares Joe to hit him! Roman fires up with every hit, then stands up to hit him back! They brawl, Joe backs Roman down then runs, into a Samoan Drop!

TWO, and Joe gets to ropes. Roman stands up now, glares at Joe from across the ring, then locks and loads. Joe rolls out, knowing what’s coming. The referee keeps Roman in the ring, but Roman still slips out the side, for a jumping- forearm smash from Joe! Joe bounces Roman off the steel steps time and time again, dedicating each hit to The Shield, to Ambrose, and for what Roman did to Joe last week. Joe refreshes the count, then whips Roman but Roman reverses to send Joe into the steps! Roman goes to the steel steps, pulling the top half off, but the referee reminds him of the No Champion’s Advantage.

Joe dares Roman to do it, the referee tries to keep both men from doing any such thing, so Joe sucker punches Roman. Roman uses the steps to springboard for a SUPERMAN PUNCH! They return into the ring, SUPERMAN PUNCH again! TWO! Roman is shocked, fans are raucous and declare “This is Awesome!” The champ gets up, fans fire up, battle cry echoes out but Joe kicks Roman. Roman blocks the yurinagi, Joe throws Roman aside and into the referee! The referee takes offense, but that was a mistake! Roman tries to reason with him, but then Joe runs in, so Roman saves the referee by getting both of them clear. Joe hits buckles, Roman goes for a spear, Joe hits the yurinagi! Cover, TWO! Joe argues with the referee, that had to have been three. Fans are thunderous, Roman gets to a corner, and rocks Joe with an uppercut. Joe ducks on, Coquina Clutch! Roman throws him off, SPEAR outta nowhere! Roman wins and is STILL Intercontinental Champion! Will 2018 be the Year of the Big Dog?

 

Kurt Angle is visited by Paul Heyman.

The Advocate wishes to help the General Manager. There is a conspiracy afoot, in case Angle didn’t know. If Kane and Strowman gang up on Brock Lesnar, Lesnar will be “proactive” as opposed to “reactive”. Heyman vows 2018 is the Year of the Beast.

 

The ‘Zo Train’s Drew Gulak & Ariya Daivari are in the ring.

They are here on behalf of Enzo Amore with a message. “My name is Enzo Amore, and I am a Certified G and a Bonafide Stud, and you can’t teach that.” How are you doing? Not so great, because Enzo has the flu. Therefore, he cannot defend his Cruiserweight Championship. Fans don’t like that. “What do we have over here? A couple of haters!” Had Enzo been healthy, he would’ve wiped the floor with Cedric Alexander. In fact, Enzo wishes he was healthy just so he could tell Alexander off. Wait, Alexander is here to hear this in person. The Carolina Kid was expecting a championship match and competition. But if Enzo is “sick”, who will step up in his place? The ‘Zo Train talks it out, and Gulak tells Alexander that his competition will be in a tag team match. The ‘Zo Train VS Alexander & “anyone who walks down that ramp”. Alexander doesn’t have many friends, so good luck finding someone to team with you. Oh is that so? Goldust is here!

The Bizarre One may not be a Cruiserweight, but they did say “anyone.”

Cedric Alexander & Goldust VS The ‘Zo Train!

Alexander starts against Daivari at the bell. They tie up, Daivari gets a wristlock but Alexander slips and spins out to throw Daivari. Alexander gives Daivari European Uppercuts then whips, but ducks to handspring headscissors and dropkick Daivari down. Gulak is scared off, Daivari pounces in the distraction and throws Alexander into buckles. Daivari drags Alexander up, snapmare to chinlock. Goldust rallies the fans, Alexander feeds off the energy and fights back against Daivari. He powers Daivari back a bit at a time, but Daivari knocks him down. Daivari trash talks Guldust but gets Alexander’s back elbow! Fans rally again, Goldust fires up, and both men crawl. Hot tags to Gulak and Goldie! Goldust rallies on the Philly Fury, bulldog turns into headlock and punches, then the bulldog. Goldust knocks Daivari down, then rocks Gulak with uppercuts. Fans know “You still got it!” even as Gulak reverses the whip, powerslam! Daivari comes in, takes the atomic drop, then Goldust climbs up for a top rope CROSSBODY onto the ‘Zo Train!

Tag to Alexander, springboard clotheslines! Daivari is thrown out, Goldust gives Gulak an uppercut, Lumbar Check! Alexander & Goldust win! Enzo may be out sick, but he’ll have to defend that title sometime. Will 2018 bring us a new Cruiserweight Champion?

 

“Ladies and Gentlemen: Elias.”

The Drifter is in Miami, and reminds everyone that WWE means “Walk With Elias.” That means everything in the WWE is his, and he wants all of us to Walk With Elias! Elias vows to win the Royal Rumble, main event Wrestlemania, and give the performance of a lifetime. His first performance of the New Year is with the talented artists, Bo Dallas and Curt Axel. Bo brings the cowbell, Axel brings the jingle bells.

They dedicate this song to their hero, who returns next week, The Miz! “Should old acquaintance be forgot,” fans boo Axel’s lack of rhythm and Bo’s horrible whistling. Elias takes it from here… “Well I came to Miami, to see, who wanted to walk~. But no one, who is from here, is not worthy, not even The Rock! This city is filled–”

Finn Balor & The Club VS Elias & The Miztourage!

The Extraordinary Man reunites with old friends to ruin the New Year for a trio of NERDS! Will this New Year be Too Sweet?

Raw returns with the match already in  action. Axel backs Finn into a corner and rams in his shoulders before snapmare and neck snap. Cover, TWO, tag to Elias. The Drifter goes after Finn with a kick to the ribs and a haymaker. Elias whips Finn, Finn kicks back but Elias yanks on that bad arm. Elias gives furious body shots and stomps, the ref backs him down but he doesn’t let up. He drags Finn up, Finn blocks the punch and punches back. Finn reaches for his corner but Elias boots him down, cover, TWO. Elias wrenches Finn’s arm on the mat, The Club rallies for their former leader. The fans rally with them, Finn gets up and reaches but Elias brings him down. The fans chant “Too Sweet! Woop woop!” Finn gets up again, trips up Elias and gives him a double stomp to the chest. Both men crawl for their corners, hot tags to Gallows and Dallas! Gallows rallies on Bo, smacks Axel one, YAKUZA Kick for Bo. Gallows keeps teh rally going, another boot to Bo before a big splash! Elias drags him off the cover, but Anderson throws him out. Bo runs, into another YAKUZA Kick, then Axel runs into an uppercut. Tag to Anderson, tag to Finn, MAGIC KILLER!

Then Anderson DIVES onto Axel! Finn climbs up for COUP DE GRACE! Finn & The Club win! Now that’s too sweet.

 

Miami is now Suplex City!

The Big Red Machine wants to “tame the Beast” with the help of the Monster Among Men, but Strowman turned him down. As such, the Advocate must point out yet another stacked deck against his client, the “reigning, defending, undisputed Universal Heavyweight Champion, BROCK! LESNAR!” Like, seriously? Why else would Lesnar have to defend his championship against challengers, plural. Remember how it used to be? “In this corner, the challenger, singular.” But at the Royal Rumble, it’s Beast VS Monster VS Machine. Lesnar must defend against both Strowman and Kane. Everyone knows this trick, don’t they? Strowman simply has to beat Kane so that Lesnar loses the title. Or, Kane simply has to beat Strowman so that Lesnar loses the title. No one has to beat Lesnar so that Lesnar loses the title, because “that just ain’t gonna happen.” Spoiler: Lesnar will still win at the Royal Rumble. It doesn’t matter how you stack the deck against Lesnar. You could line up Strowman, you could line up Kane, you could line up all 30 men in the Royal Rumble! Lesnar will still win. He is the most dominant champion in professional wrestling. Lesnar fears no challenge, challenger, challengers, nor does he fear Monsters and a “Devil’s Favorite Demon”. Mic drop from Heyman, but an appearance by said Devil’s Favorite Demon!

Kane walks down to the ring and stares Lesnar down. Fans chant “Suplex City!” but we get a CHOKE SLAM instead! Kane wants Lesnar to consider what just happened to him, Lesnar sits up and LAUGHS.

Lesnar then clobbers Kane out of the ring, the Raw roster floods the ringside area to keep them apart. Kane and Lesnar keep trying, but they’re kept apart thanks to referees and security. Fans want to “Let them fight!” but the Big Red Machine has already been ushered to the back. Lesnar holds up his championship belt, how much longer will it be his?

 

My Thoughts:

The first Raw of 2018 was a solid episode, but could’ve been a little better. Alexa Bliss’ recurring story of the night being that she was legitimately afraid of Asuka was perfect for both of them. Alexa has been a somewhat cowardly Heel and Asuka should’ve been feared by all on the main roster, so things finally feel right for The Empress. Their match was also solid quality, though it had a slow start. With Asuka getting the win over the Raw Women’s Champion already, perhaps WWE will have this in their back pocket should they decide someone from SmackDown is to win the inaugural Women’s Rumble. Jason Jordan has a great performance both as a character and a wrestler. His arrogance is growing, and it was smart to have Rollins point that out, but then it was also great for Jordan to actually come through and win. His dynamic with The Shield’s Roman and Rollins has a lot of possibilities while Ambrose is out recovering, as does the interactions of Renee Young and Samoa Joe. I’m kinda hoping Renee’s temper gets the better of her the way it did with The Miz when they were all on SmackDown. And Roman VS Joe was also great, as Roman might finally be coming into his own as far as in-ring performance.

I was a little disappointed WOKEN Hardy didn’t just sneak attack Bray again, or that roles weren’t reversed this time. However, kudos to Bray for at least making Apollo Crews look strong even though Bray still won. With the way things are going, chances are the Great War pre-filmed match between Bray and Hardy won’t happen until ‘Mania, but I’m sure they’ll milk their live in-ring encounter during the Rumble for all they can. I was also a little disappointed Enzo Amore was “sick”, but it was still fun to see Goldust have some action on-screen as a Face. Cross-divisional interaction like this is what the Cruiserweights should’ve been doing all of 2017 but maybe now WWE is seeing the error in their ways. But I really enjoyed Strowman essentially winning a handicap match and giving Miami fans what they wanted, as well as everyone getting what they wanted in Balor Club actually becoming a thing. There wasn’t a lot of pomp and circumstance, but hopefully WWE lets The Club gain some momentum while The Shield is a man down. Lastly, while Heyman gives another great promo, the ending with Lesnar & Kane left much to be desired. Lesnar no-selling the Choke Slam is whatever, but not letting things get out of control and go into overtime was a disappointing and anti-climactic ending for what was supposed to be a hyped up segment.

My Score: 7.9/10

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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (5/30/25)

The greatEST SmackDown!

Published

on

Could this be the biggEST and strongEST SmackDown of the year?

SmackDown in Knoxville sees the returns of Bianca Belair, Cody Rhodes and John Cena, along with some final Money in the Bank qualifiers!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Women’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match Qualifier Triple Threat: Jade Cargill VS Naomi VS Nia Jax; Naomi wins and advances to Money in the Bank.
  • R-Truth VS JC Mateo w/ Solo Sikoa; Mateo wins.
  • Rey Fenix & Je’Von Evans VS Los Garza w/ Santos Escobar; Los Garza win.
  • Zelina Vega VS Alba Fyre w/ The Green Administration; Zelina wins.
  • Men’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match Qualifier Triple Threat: Carmelo Hayes VS Andrade VS Jacob Fatu; Andrade wins and advances to Money in the Bank.

PLAY BY PLAY

Bianca Belair is here!

Knoxville fires up for their strongEST, fastEST, quickEST, toughEST, roughEST, and greatEST hometown hero as she struts out to the ring. Bianca high-fives and hugs fans along the ramp, as well as mom and dad at ringside. Bianca then grabs a mic to say, “Man, it feels good to be in Knoxville!” The fans cheer and chant for “EST! EST!” Bianca says she loves them so much. And she couldn’t come out here without singing Rocky Top! Y’all ready? The fans cheer, and the music plays! Bianca conducts the fans as they sing for the University of Tennessee. In fact, the Lady Vols softball team is playing in the Super Regionals right now!

Bianca smiles and says this city is so special to her. Not just because it is her hometown, but because it is her safe space. She has her love and support from mom ‘n’ dad, and has all the fans who show up and show out for her. With everything Bianca’s been going through, losing at Mania, getting injured, losing tag titles and friends along the way, she just wanted to come back home to her safe space. The fans cheer, and Bianca says she came home to heal. While she’s not 100%, she is doing everything she can to get back to the ring and continue to show us why she is the EST of Tennessee and of WWE! The fans cheer that!

Bianca says with all that said, Knoxville, welcome to Friday Night SmackDown! But wait, she’s interrupted by Naomi! The fans boo but Naomi says, “Oh my gosh~! Finally! B, I am so glad you finally here on SmackDown!” Bianca says now is not the time, Naomi. Naomi asks Bianca to please hear her out. It has been way too long. Not a day has gone by when Naomi doesn’t think about what happened to them. What is there to talk about? What could Naomi say? What could she want from Bianca? The fans chant “YOU SUCK!” at Naomi, and Naomi says she just wants forgiveness. She is begging for it!

Naomi knows things go toff the rails, but she is here because she wants to fix it, she is trying to fix it, but she alone can’t fix it. Months have gone by, and Naomi has tried to communicate, to say the past can be the past and that they can move forward. Bianca has not responded back to Naomi once. Naomi even visited Bianca’s parent’s house! But no one would answer! WHAT?! Mom ‘n’ Dad don’t know about that, but Naomi says no one was home, so she let herself in! Naomi looked through the photo albums, the one right on the front coffee table. And in those photos, Bianca looked so happy. It reminded Naomi of how they were as tag team champions.

Bianca stops Naomi there. Naomi, Bianca will make this perfectly clear. They were best friends, but Naomi betrayed Bianca’s trust. Naomi took their friend, Jade, and threw her onto a car, then lied about it for months! Bianca said she was done with Naomi, she meant that, and if Naomi ever comes near her family again, what Naomi did to Jade will be nothing compared to what Bianca does to Naomi. The fans fire up for that! Naomi gets emotional, but then she gets mad. “Y’know, Bianca, it wouldn’t be good for you and your mama to be in a wheelchair.” The fans boo as Naomi laughs maniacally. Naomi says she’d hate if something happened to Bianca here and now!

Naomi storms up on Bianca, but then JADE makes her way out here! Naomi is even angrier now, but this Storm starts throwing hands! The fans fire up as Jade BOOTS Naomi down! Bianca and Jade look to each other, neither really saying or doing anything. Naomi runs up but Jade TOSSES her out! Jade and Bianca look to each other again, but then here comes NIA! The Irresistible Force won’t be left out of this, especially when this is the Women’s Triple Threat Qualifier for the night! This match now opens the night, who earns SmackDown’s final golden ticket to the Women’s Money in the Bank ladder match?

Women’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match Qualifier Triple Threat: Jade Cargill VS Naomi VS Nia Jax!

SmackDown returns, this match is already going, and Naomi POSTS Nia! Naomi stalks Jade, rains down forearms, and the fans boo. Naomi stomps to BITE Jade’s hand! Jade still fights back, so Naomi has the arms to STOMP Jade down! Naomi flexes, the fans boo, and Naomi puts Jade in a corer. Naomi runs to DROPKICK Jade in the corner! Naomi SLAPS Jade, drags her into the drop zone, then goes up, up, and twerks! HIP DROP! Naomi covers, ROPEBREAK! Naomi is annoyed but she sits Jade up to stomp a mudhole in. But Nia runs up! Naomi dodges, the HIP ATTACK hits Jade! Naomi goes to the apron to ROUNDHOUES Nia!

Naomi reels Nia in for a HEATSEEKER! Nia flops to the floor, the fans rally for Jade, but Naomi kicks her around. Naomi goes up the corner, leaps, but Jade catches her! Jade FALL AWAY SLAMS Naomi, then kips up! Knoxville fires up with Jade and she runs up to LARIAT! And ELBOW! And SCRAPBUSTER! Cover, Nia breaks it! The fans boo but Nai huffs ‘n’ puffs and drags Naomi up. Nia whips Naomi, pops her up and HEADBUTTS her down! Then she SAMOAN DROPS Naomi! Nia soaks up heat, then lines the two up. Naomi grabs at Nia’s leg but Nia CLUBS her down! Nia stomps Jade for good measure, then drops a leg, brother!

Nia TOSSES Jade out, then goes up the corner. Nia SUPER LEG DROPS on Naomi!! Cover, TWO!!! Naomi survives and Nia is shocked! The fans rally while Nia stalks Naomi. Naomi clings to ropes as Nia pulls at her arm. Nia CLUBS Naomi, whips her to ropes, then SAMOAN DROP- NO, Naomi makes it a CRUCIFIX DRIVER! Ghost pin, TWO!! Nia survives the sudden turnaround, Naomi sees Jade crawling in, and Naomi goes after her as SmackDown goes picture in picture.

Naomi KICKS Nia while she’s down, then kicks her more. Naomi puts Nia in a corner, CHOKES her on the ropes, then clamps on with a SLEEPER! Nia THROWS Naomi away, then TOSSES her out. Nia soaks up heat, but Jade runs in and rolls Nia up! TWO! Nia stands, and she HEADBUTTS Jade down! Nia looms over Jade, drags her up, but Jade fires forearms! Jade backs Nia down, then runs, and she CLOBBERS Nia outta the ring! Jade fires up and has the fans with her. Jade drags Naomi up from the apron but Naomi fires hands. Nia is back to HIP ATTACK Jade against the POST! Nia soaks up more heat, then taunts Naomi.

Naomi stands on the apron, argues with Nia, but they apparently agree to mug Jade for both their benefit. They put Jade in the corner, Naomi digs her boot in, and then Nia sends Naomi in for a SPALSH! Nia adds a SPLASH of her own! Naomi snapmares Jade, runs, and SLIDING LARIATS! Jade sputters and Nia taunts her. Nia and Naomi soak up the heat together, but Jade fights back! Nia HEADBUTTS Jade down! Nia drags Jade up, and Naomi KICKS Jade low! They soak up more heat, talk trash on Jade, and SmackDown returns to single picture. Nia scoops and SIDEWALK SLAMS! Naomi runs to SPLIT LEG DROP! Cover, but Nia drags Naomi away!

Nia and Naomi argue again, and then Naomi rolls Nia up! ONE, and Nia grabs Naomi to shove her to a corner! Nia SPLASHES, then pushes Naomi down. Nia runs to SENTON! Nia grins while Naomi sputters and the fans rally up. Jade rises to fire forearms on Nia! Then she ELBOWS Naomi in a corner! She ELBOWS Nia, but then Nia follows Jade! Jade dodges so Nia SPLASHES Naomi! Jade then SUPERKICKS! Nia wobbles, Jade SUPERKICKS again! And SPINEBUSTERS! But Naomi METEORAS! Cover, TWO! Jade survives and the fans rally up. Naomi goes up, SPLIT- LEG MOONSAULT on Nia! But Jade has Naomi in the chicken wings!

Jade brings Naomi around, JADED!! Cover, Nia CLOBBERS them both! The fans rally while all three women are down! Nia climbs a corner, Jade is after her with forearms! Naomi joins in, drags Jade back, but now they trade shots! Nia DOUBLE CROSSBODIES! Cover on Jade, TWO! Cover on Naomi, TWO! Nia grows frustrated but the fans rally up again. Nia drag Naomi up, fireman’s carries, and she climbs the corner! The fans already anticipate what’s coming, SUPER SAMOAN DROP!! Cover, JADE FROG SPLASHES IN!! Cover, TWO!!! The fans fire up while all three women are down again! “This is Awesome!”

Jade rises, she clamps onto Nia, but Nia HEADBUTTs her! And HEADBUTTS Naomi! Jade BOOTS Nia down! Cover, TWO! Jade runs up on Naomi but Naomi BOOTS her! Naoim goes up top but Jade is right on her! They fight for control, but then Nia joins in! TOWER OF DOOM!! Nia double stacks her opponents, for a A-NIA-LATOR!! Naomi avoids it, Jade takes it all! Naomi ghost pins Nia, AND WINS!!

Winner: Naomi, by pinfall (advances to Money in the Bank)

Nia did a lot of the damage, but it is Naomi who wins out! Will everyone in the Women’s MITB Ladder Match now have to #ProceedWithCaution?

 

Solo Sikoa’s crew arrives.

Solo says they will win Money in the Bank together! Jacob Fatu, Solo Sikoa, whichever one wins MITB wins it fof the family! But then they hear R-Truth talking to… Lil’ Jimmy? Solo says Truth’s childhood hero beats him, and now he’s talking to ghosts. Truth taps Solo on the shoulder and asks if there’s something Solo wants to say. Solo says Truth is crazy touching him. JC Mateo steps up but Solo has him stand down. Truth says he wants to be honest. He’s never seen JC a day before in his life. Is this Solo’s son? He’s husky! Truth asks if he can teach Solo’s husky son a lesson in the ring. Solo says that sounds good to him.

Truth says he’ll go talk to Nick Aldis. “Boy, y’all big boneded!” Truth heads off, and Solo says don’t worry, they’ll take care of him. Let’s have fun. Fatu says keep it 100. They can have their fun, he’s got his own business to take care of. Yadada mean? The Imperial Unit against Truth, Samoan Werewolf in a qualifier, will everything go the family’s way?

 

Chelsea Green confronts Nick Aldis.

The Hot Mess hides behind a cardboard cutout of herself as she tells the SmackDown General Manager, “What happened on Saturday night was a deliberate-” Piper Niven has to direct Chelsea to point at Aldis, and Aldis says he can’t quite understand her from behind the cardboard mask. Piper holds the mask between Chelsea and camera, though we do get a glimpse of her fancy headgear. Chelsea repeats herself, but Aldis says she needs to be looking at him when they talk. Chelsea hides her face in shame, but she says it is still a deliberate hitjob put on by vicious Zelina Vega! Even her Secret Her-vice could not stop it!

Chelsea demands that Zelina be suspended, stripped of her title, and that Chelsea be reinstated as the champion! Chelsea, no need to be so ugly about this. Gasp! Aldis says what he means is, no suspensions, and we can talk a rematch down the road once Chelsea is medically cleared. Then he is doing nothing for what Zelina did to Chelsea?! Alba says if he won’t, then they will! Yeah, Zelina VS Alba! Tonight! Alba is a bit surprised, but Aldis says, “Chelsea knows best. Alba VS Zelina, I actually like the sound of that. I will make that official right now, if you do one thing for me. Please leave me alone.”

The Green Administration hurries away, but will Alba make sure Chelsea brand justice is served? Or will La Muneca just keep racking up the wins?

 

Backstage interview with Tiffany Stratton.

Byron Saxton is with the WWE Women’s Champion, and says that MITB is around the corner. Tiff successfully cashed in her own contract to become champion, but how is she handling the pressure of knowing the same thing could happen to her? Tiff says she can’t wait to see who wins MITB. Then she can handle the pressure by being prepared. Having this title makes her the top threat to the division, but let’s be fair. She’s always been the girl everyone has been obsessed with. So whoever wins, targeting her will be a big mistake. But then in steps Naomi.

Naomi says if Tiff thought Nia was a problem, then she ain’t seen nothing yet. Naomi vows to win MITB and cash in for Tiff’s title, wherever and whenever she wants. And in case Lil’ Miss Tiffy forgot, when Naomi was fighting for a championship, Tiff stayed in Naomi’s way. Wanna know what happens when people play with Naomi? Just ask Jade. Naomi heads out, and Alexa Bliss steps in. Alexa says she wouldn’t be so worried about Naomi. Be worried about Alexa. Alexa heads out now, Tiff clutches to the title a little bit tighter, who will be trying to run the clock out on Tiffy Time?

 

R-Truth VS JC Mateo w/ Solo Sikoa!

To Solo’s point, #RonCena could not make John Cena see the light at Saturday Night’s Main Event, and Truth might be relapsing if he’s talking to Lil’ Jimmy again. But will Truth relapse so far that we get the R-Truth that was once United States Champion? Or will a Tour of the Islands send Truth off the deep end?

SmackDown returns and JC makes his entrance, Solo backing him up. The bell rings and Truth runs up, only for JC to RAM him into a corner! JC RAMS Truth again and again, then lets off. JC whips corner to corner hard and Truth falls in a heap! JC whips corner to corner again just as hard, and Truth falls in a heap again. Solo talks trash but the fans rally behind Truth. JC runs up but Truth dodges! Truth SHOULDER TACKLES! JC stays up, so Truth runs and SHOULDER TACKLES! “What’s Up?” Truth runs, ducks ‘n’ dodges, and SHOULDER TACKLES! Then he hits the SPIN OUT- CROSSBODY! JC then gets up to GACHIMUCHI MOONSAULT!

JC smirks as he looms over Truth, and Solo says to finish this off now. JC runs to SENTON but Truth moves! Truth calls for it! “YOU CAN’T SEE ME!” FIVE KNUCKLE SHUFFLE! Truth fireman’s carries JC, but JC is too much! Truth falls over again! Solo laughs, JC whips, TOUR OF THE ISLANDS!! Cover, JC wins!

Winner: JC Mateo, by pinfall

Truth tried to be like John Cena of old, but it just wasn’t meant to be. JC beats up on Truth more, then stands him up for Solo! But here comes BIG Jim! Jimmy has a chair, he runs JC off, but Solo stands his ground. Solo says his brother wouldn’t hit him with that chair, would he? Jimmy steps to Solo so Solo steps out, but that lets JC CLOBBER Jimmy! But then Solo has JC stand down! They’re family! Solo and JC leave, leaving Jimmy wondering what this is about. Will Jimmy make it clear to Solo that Jimmy’s not the one who has to come to his senses?

 

The Street Profits are here!

The WWE Tag Team Champions walk through the smoke to be on stage and the fans cheer. Angelo Dawkins & Montez Ford hold up the titles, walk to the ring, then step inside. The fans cheer as they hold up the belts again, then the Profits grab the mics. Ford says, “Knoxville, Tennessee, oh I love everything about you, and what I have, too. But lemme rap to y’all real fast. This tag team division that we’re a part of, the greatest tag team division on any brand, any promotion… It’s on fire right now.” Dawkins says, “Talk to ’em.” Ford says, “But just like how the gorilla fears us, make no mistake about it, let’s not forget who’s leading the charge right now: The Street Profits.”

The fans cheer, and Dawkins says hey, they got all the teams coming at ’em! DIY, Motor City Machine Guns, Fraxiom, and now… The Wyatts?! The fans cheer that, and Ford says that’s sick. But what big bro is saying, it don’t matter who it is, the Profits will defend against anybody. Well hold on, here comes Fraxiom! Nathan Frazer & Axiom go to the ring to stand with the Profits, and they have mics. Frazer says alright, since the Profits are talking about defending the titles, well, Frazer & Axiom didn’t exactly get a fair shake. Ford says, “Fraxiom, is it?” He congratulates them for being on a roll, but up until the Wyatt Sick6 got in the Profits’ business…

Yeah, the Profits had them beat. Wow, oh, okay. Sure, maybe… But maybe not. Thanks to the Wyatts, we’ll never know. And now that those shenanigans are behind us, it is fair to say that Fraxiom and the Profits need to run it back! The fans like the sound of that! But wait, here come the Machine Guns! Alex Shelley & Chris Sabin have mics, and Shelley says okay, hold on, sorry to interrupt. Fraxiom’s entire basis for a rematch is that the Profits never beat them. Well, last time Shelley checked, the Profits never beat MCMG! So if they’re handing out title matches, MCMG will take one. But naturally, here comes DIY!

Tommaso Ciampa, Johnny Gargano, and Candice LeRae have their own mics, and the Poison Pixie says no no no no. She is pretty sure “you losers” have had a million chances, and “the nerds” just got here. Whoa, hold on? Just got here? Sounds like Candice just got back, so she should do us a favor and shut up. Gargano says you shut up, idiot! The reason DIY brought in Gargano’s beautiful wife is to even the odds against all of what this is! Everyone can see there is a conspiracy in the tag team division to hold down the BTTITW! And now with the Wyatts showing up- Ciampa has Gargano ixnay on the amily-fay.

Do not talk about you know who, scratch that, let’s get to business. All these teams have all KILLED the tag division that DIY built! Matter of fact, let us hold a moment of silence for the death of the SmackDown Tag Division. Everyone, stand up, bow your heads, and give a moment of silence… now. OH NO! The lights go out! All the teams panic, because when the lights turn on, UNCLE HOWDY is on the corner! Howdy laughs, because the rest of the Wyatts flank the ring! Erick Rowan drags MCMG out to DOUBLE LARIAT! Dexter Lumis is up top to CANNONBALL onto the Profits and Gargano! Joe Gacy is in, and he handsprings to bring Fraxiom to the UPSIDE-DOWN!!

Lumis then runs, POWERBOMB SENTON COMBO on Axiom! Ciampa freaks out, turns around, and Nikki Cross is there! CROSSBODY onto Candice! The fans fire up, and Howdy has Frazer for SISTER ABIGAIL! “We’re here!!” It is just as the Profits said, and now it is clear. Will some killer combination of the Wyatts go right after the gold?

 

Rey Fenix & Je’Von Evans VS Los Garza w/ Santos Escobar!

Worlds Collide is just over a week away, and all four of these men will be involved. The Immortal Firebird and the Young OG are going after the NXT North American Championship in a Fatal 4 Way while Legado Del Fantasma will be taking on AAA’s Pagano, Psycho Clown y El Hijo de Dr. Wagner Jr. Who will be heading for Los Angeles with all the momentum behind them?

Speaking of that North American Championship, the champion is here! Ethan Page joins commentary and says what a year for him, to be honest. Wade says that title has never looked better than on Ethan’s shoulder. Fenix makes his entrance now, followed by Je’Von’s. The teams sort out and Fenix starts against Angel. Angel and Fenix circle, the fans rally up, and the two tie up. Angel fires a forearm, Fenix fires back, repeat! Fenix gets the edge but Angel shoves then drops down. Fenix cartwheels over the dropdown, then comes back, ducks ‘n’ dodges, and RANAS! Angel tumbles, the fans fire up, and Fenix somersaults, but into a fireman’s carry!

Fenix slips free, ripcords to ROUNDHOUSE, but Angel HEADBUTTS! Both men stagger back, tags to Berto and Je’Von! Je’Von dodges and springboards to BOUNCY~ roll-up! TWO, and Berto mule kicks! Berto CLUBS Je’Von, whips, but Je’Von reverses and slips around. Berto bucks the O’Conner, springboards and CROSSBODIES! Cover, TWO! Berto drags Je’Von up, but Je’Von kicks! Berto blocks, but the ENZIGIRI hits! Je’Von runs up, and BOUNCY~ RANAS! The fans fire up and Je’Von DROPKICKS! Berto bails out, Angel runs in, but Je’Von goes Matrix to dodge! Je’Von kips up, and STUNNERS! Angel flops back and the fans fire up!

Los Garza regroups, Je’Von tags Fenix, and they build speed, but have to dodge Angel first. Fenix SOBATS, Je’Von KICKS, and both men ENZIGIRI! Berto is up top, he leaps, but into DOUBLE SUPERKICKS! Cover, TWO! Fenix runs to basement CALF KICK! Cover, TWO! Berto stays in this for Los Garza while SmackDown goes picture in picture.

Fenix drags Berto up to RAM him into the corner. Tag to Je’Von and they mug Berto. Berto fires hands back on Je’Von, but Je’Von headlocks. Berto powers up and out and Angel tags in. Berto drop toeholds Je’Von into Angel’s KNEE at the ropes! Angel TEARS OFF HIS PANTS! Angel drapes those over Je’Von before he KICKS Je’Von in the side! Angel stalks Je’Von to the corner, tags Berto, and they shove Je’Von for a double hip toss, TU LO SABE! Then DOUBLE SUPERKICK! Berto covers, TWO! Berto argues the count but the ref defends it. Berto shoves Je’Von to ELBOW him down! Berto then DUMPS Je’Von down to be under the ropes.

Tag to Angel and Berto sits Je’Von up on the apron. Angel runs to KNEE Je’Von down! Santos joins in with Los Garza as they soak up the heat, and Angel drags Je’Von back in. Angel stands Je’Von up, hoists him to the top rope, then climbs up behind him. Angel CLUBS away on Je’Von, mocks the clapping, and he THROWS Je’Von down. Angel KICKS Je’Von in the arm and Je’Von clutches his hand. Angel drags Je’Von to the ropes, CHOKES him, and the ref reprimands. The ref counts, Angel steps off at 4, and Berto BOOTS Je’Von down. ANgel clamps onto Je’Von with an armlock and chinbar but Je’Von reaches for Fenix.

Angel keeps hold of Je’Von but Je’Von fires hands! SmackDown returns to single picture as Je’Von dodges the lariat, leaps, but Angel catches him! Angel puts Je’Von in a corner and through ropes. Angel pulls an arm and leg against the ropes, but stops as the ref counts. Angel runs to KNEE Je’Von in the ribs! Je’Von slumps to the apron, and Angel sucker punches Fenix! Angel goes back for Je’Von but Je’Von fires body shots! Angel blocks a kick, slips around and Gory Especials! Angel walks over, tags Berto, and Berto slingshots, GARZA ESPECIAL! Cover, TWO! The fans rally up for Je’Von but Berto clamps onto him with a chinlock.

Je’Von endures, even as Berto traps an arm. Je’Von fights up, pries the hold open, and he arm-drags Berto! Je’Von leaps but Berto grabs a leg! Ethan laughs from commentary, but Je’Von kicks free to SUPERKICK! Both men are down, Je’Von and Berto crawl, hot tags to Angel and Fenix! The fans fire up as Fenix rallies on Angel with forearms! Fenix then dodges a shot to springboard and FLYING ARM-DRAG, to a DOUBLE STOMP! Fenix fires off KICKS on Berto, then fires up with Knoxville! Fenix uses Berto to jump up and RANA Angel! Fenix then goes corner to corner to JUMP SOBAT! Fenix fires hands, shoves Angel aside, then goes up.

Fenix springboards to QUEBRADA! Cover, Berto breaks it! Berto whips Fenix, Fenix goes Spider-Man, and Je’Von tags in! Fenix says HASTA LA VISTA, BABY! Angel is up, he pops Fenix up to KICK him! But Je’Von springboards to FLYING LARIAT! The fans fire up, Berto springboards to FLYING CHUCK! All four men are down and the fans fire up again! “This is Awesome!” as Angel and Je’Von crawl. Angel CHOPS Je’Von, Je’Von CHOPS back, and the fans “WOO~!” Angel CHOPS again, so Je’Von CHOPS again! Angel fires a forearm, Je’Von fires back, and they go around with forearm after forearm! The fans fire up, Angel CHOPS, a
nd Je’Von SUPER PUNCHES!

Je’Von runs, BOUNCY- NO, Angel makes it a SIT OUT POWERBOMB!! Cover, TWO!! Ethan is surprised and the fans rally up. Angel hoists Je’Von up top, tags Berto in, and they hoist Je’Von up even higher! But Fenix SHORYUKENS Angel down! Je’Von fires hands on Berto and SHOVES him down! Fenix climbs up to join Je’Von now, and ADIOS AMIGO DOUBLE STOMPS for Angel! Je’Von adjusts, to SUPER DUPER SWANTON onto Los Garza! Ethan says don’t get closer, keep this in the ring! He taunts both his challengers, Fenix and Je’Von stand down to put Los Garza in the ring. The fans rally up, but then Ethan CLOBBERS Fenix & Je’Von!

Ethan TOSSES Fenix over the desk! But Je’Von SUPERKICKS Ethan down! The fans fire up, Je’Von hurries in, and he dodges Angel! But Berto rolls Je’Von up, TWO!! Je’Von dodges Berto, rebound and RED DOT!! Berto is down, Angel gets up, but Je’Von DECKS him! Je’Von goes up, up, but Santos distracts the ref! Ethan SHOVES Je’Von down! The fans boo but Berto tags Angel! Los Garza hoists Je’Von up for M T Y!! Cover, Los Garza win!

Winners: Los Garza, by pinfall

All Ego grins as he screws over two of his three challengers, and now Legado is rolling towards Worlds Collide. But will these rudos get everything they deserve in LA?

 

The Wyatts speak.

“We won’t stop. Not until we get what’s owed.” A simple yet ominous threat, are the tag titles only the beginning?

 

Zelina Vega VS Alba Fyre w/ The Green Administration!

La Muneca held onto the WWE Women’s US Championship by smacking The Hot Mess in the face with a foot, and obviously Chelsea is not happy with it. But will Alba get payback on behalf of her fearless leader? Or will things only get uglier for the Green Regime?

The bell rings and Piper distracts Zelina so Alba can CLOBBER her! Alba fires off hands, then bumps Zelina off buckles. Alba bumps Zelina off more buckles, then more buckles! And then the fourth corner! Chelsea says Zelina should’ve never messed with her! Alba fireman’s carries but Zelina fights free. Zelina KICKS Alba, KICKS again, then KICKS, but Alba CLUBS Zelina. Alba whips, scoops, and- NO, Zelina swings through to RANA! Cover, ONE! Zelina headlocks but Alba fights up and lifts Zelina. Zelina holds on but Alba powers up and out to RUN Zelina over! The fans boo but Chelsea cheers as Alba stalks Zelina.

Alba ROCKS Zelina, whips her to ropes, but Zelina wheelbarrows and arm-drags! Zelina then runs up on Alba in the corner and rains down fists! Alba shoves Zelina away at three, but Zelina comes right back to rain down more shots! Alba stops Zelina at four now, but Zelina wants another go! Alba stops Zelina at four again, and RAMS her into the corner! The fans boo but Alba grins. Zelina BOOTS Alba, goes up, and FLYING RANAS! Alba tumbles out, Piper helps her up, and Zelina goes to the apron. Alba trips Zelina up, spins and ROCKS Zelina, then gets her up. Gory Especial, but Zelina flips through to arm-drag Alba onto ropes!

The fans fire up as Zelina dials up, but Chelsea is on the apron! The ref argues with Chelsea while Zelina redials, but Piper trips her up! The fans boo but Alba SUPERKICKS Zelina! Alba salutes to Chelsea, and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and Alba stands on Zelina’s hair while pulling Zelina’s arms! The ref reprimands, Alba steps off, and she drags Zelina up to suplex for the GOURD BUSTER! Cover, TWO! Zelina stays in this and Chelsea argues with the ref. The ref says the count is fair, so Alba clamps onto Zelina with a COBRA CLUTCH! Zelina endures, the fans rally, and Zelina fights up. Zelina fires body shots, Alba ripcords and wrenches to SUPERKICK! Zelina rebounds to SHINING WIZARD! Both women fall and the fans fire up! Piper coaches Zelina, the fans rally up, and both women rise up. Alba is on Zelina and brings her to a corner, but Zelina buckle bumps Alba first!

The fans rally as Alba stalks Zelina, but Zelina bumps her off buckles again! Alba tries again, but Zelina ELBOWS Alba away. Then BOOTS her away! Zelina fires forearms on Alba, backs her down, then whips. Alba reverses but Zelina dodges to LARIAT! The fans fire up as Zelina LARIATS again! Zelina blocks a kick, ELBOWS Alba, but Alba blocks the saido. But Zelina keeps Alba from running, SNAP SAIDO! The fans rally for Zelina as she runs corner to corner, METEORA! Zelina pushes Alba out and goes up top! The fans cheer for some Latina Heat, and METEORA! Cover, TWO! Alba survives and Chelsea is relieved.

Zelina grows frustrated, but she goes back for Alba. Zelina reels Alba in, suplexes, but Alba blocks! Alba knees low, suplexes, but Zelina hits STUN DOG MILLIONAIRE! Alba is down, Zelina goes up, MOONSAULT FLOPS! Alba goes up now, and she SWANTON BOMBS! Cover, TWO!?! Zelina survives and shocks Alba! Chelsea is upset again but Alba hurries to bring Zelina up. Alba KICKS Zelina out, and now Chelsea takes off her face mask?! She tells Piper to stand Zelina up! Piper does as told, and Chelsea takes a swing, but Zelina ducks! The face mask SMACKS Piper!! Chelsea is shocked, then furious, and then she chases after Zelina!

Zelina slips into the ring, Chelsea gets on the apron, but Zelina sends Alba at her! They almost collide, and then Zelina rolls Alba up! Zelina hops on, CODE RED!! Cover, Zelina wins!!

Winner: Zelina Vega, by pinfall

Chelsea tried so hard to screw Zelina over that she just screwed up her own team! Zelina survives again, will no one take down the Vega Administration?

 

The Miz pep talks Carmelo Hayes.

Melo looks good, and he just has to follow the plan. If Melo follows that plan, with no mistakes, they will win. Melo says he knows what he’s doing. Miz asks if he really does. Because Miz has taken Black Mass after Black Mass, sacrificing himself for Melo. Does Melo understand? Miz gave up this chance at MITB for Melo! Miz has already done it twice! If Melo wins this match tonight, Miz will guide Melo to make sure “we are Mr. MITB.” Wait, we? Miz says, “Who do you think got you in this position?” Melo says Melo did. Melo appreciates everything Miz has done for him, from sacrificing to taking hits for him, and helping him win the Andre the Giant Battle Royal.

But nobody told Miz to do that. Melo will run the play exactly as Miz designed it, but what brought Melo to the dance is Melo’s talent. Melo goes out there and does it better than anybody else. Melo puts up 40 points on a bad day, because he is H1M. And Miz just needs to let Melo be H1M. They good? Miz nods, and Melo says okay, let’s do the thing. They are Melo Don’t Miz and they are Awes-H1M. Miz still nods, but he doesn’t seem genuinely happy. Will Miz let Melo be Melo? Even if that means letting H1M fail?

 

Giulia speaks.

“Throughout my entire career, even back when I started in Japan, I had one goal… It’s not to be ‘the best.’ Everyone says that. It’s hollow and empty. My goal is to be indisputable. You can love me or hate me, admiration or disgust, it means nothing. But I’m impossible to deny. My opponent doesn’t matter, because I only view them as an opportunity to build my legacy. Evidence you cannot refute. SmackDown, you will see. I will hit harder, move faster, think sharper, and conquer everything, just like I’ve always done. The question isn’t, ‘Who’s going to let me?” It’s, ‘Who’s going to stop me?'” She adds in Japanese, “If you can stop it, stop it.”

Will SmackDown and all of the WWE soon succumb to The Beautiful Madness?

 

Zelina returns backstage.

She refreshes for a second, but Giulia is there! And Giulia says she sees Zelina, but she also sees that title more. Zelina scoffs and leaves. Could Giulia be aiming for everything once she becomes Ms. Money in the Bank?

 

Damian Priest is here!

Knoxville cheers as The Archer of Infamy heads to the ring, victorious from Saturday Night’s Main Event and that brutal Steel Cage match. Priest grabs a mic to tell Tennessee, “Ever since I beat Drew on Saturday, it’s like I’m breathing in fresh air. Y’know, there was a time when I lived on the street, if we were beefing with another street, that war could go for years. But in WWE, you have a beef with somebody, you have a match and it’s over. But with Drew and I, we went well over a year, and that’s not normal. But we took that beef into a cage. Now, I can feel it, you can se it on my face, we went to war.

“At the end of this war, at Saturday Night’s Main Event, I gave him a Con-Chair-To, I walked out the door, and I put his ass in the past.” The fans cheer that. Priest says now he knows Drew is somewhere recovering from his scrambled brains, but he knows Drew is watching, so this is for Drew. “I still can’t stand yo ass. But the Drew McIntyre that stepped in that cage wasn’t the guy that hides behind his phone on social media. That was the old Drew, the warrior, and I appreciate that.” The fans applaud, and Priest says he won’t ask what is next for himself, he’ll just tell us all. And it is the same thing he wanted when he came to SmackDown: Championships!

The fans cheer, and Priest says this war with Drew cost him an opportunity at being in MITB. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have his eyes on a certain champion. Somebody who he has unfinished business with, and a champion he considers the most badass. The fans know that means Fatu, and he knows they know! Priest calls out Jacob Fatu! Priest respects Fatu. Priest knows where Fatu came from, what Fatu had to live through, how it feels to stand in this ring as a champion. Real talk, Priest is proud of Fatu, he congratulates Fatu, that’s real. But what Priest doesn’t respect is the crew that follows him around.

Wait, check that. What Priest doesn’t respect is the crew Fatu follows around. Priest knows at some point, they will get in this ring, handle business, but that’s for them. As for Fatu’s so-called family, if they wanna get involved, they can catch a fresh one, too. Priest won’t make it just a nickname or moniker, he wants this to be fact! Priest is and forever will be EL CAMPEON! The fans cheer that! But will the Archer soon take aim at the Samoan Werewolf? Well, speaking of, Fatu makes his way out here for tonight’s other Triple Threat Qualifier! Fatu nods to Priest, but if Fatu wins his way into the ladder match, will this showdown have to wait a little longer?

Men’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match Qualifier Triple Threat: Carmelo Hayes VS Andrade VS Jacob Fatu!

SmackDown returns and El Idolo makes his entrance, followed by H1M. The bell rings and Miz distracts Fatu and Melo attacks! Fatu ELBOWS Melo away, Andrade is on Melo with forearms, and then Fatu adds a LARIAT! Fatu looms mover Melo but then turns to stare down Andrade. The fans rally as these two step up. Andrade fires forearms but Fatu SHOVES him to a corner. Fatu runs up, Andrade dodges then whips. Fatu reverses, Andrade goes up and out to then ROCK Fatu! Andrade goes up, up, and CROSSBODIES! Cover, ONE! Melo CLUBS Andrade, TOSSES him out, and then CLUBS away on Fatu!

Miz says that’s the way! Melo HAMMERS and CHOPS, then whips, but Fatu blocks! Fatu whips Melo, Melo springboards, but into an UPPERCUT! The fans fire up and Fatu sees Melo go outside. Fatu builds speed, but Miz trips him up! The fans boo, the ref reprimands, but Fatu drags Miz into the ring! Melo goes to roll Fatu up but Fatu stays up! Fatu YANKS Melo up, scoops, but Melo slips free! Melo SUPERKICKS and Miz DUMPS Fatu out! The fans boo but Melo builds speed, only for Andrade to LARIAT! The fans cheer, and now Miz sees he is in trouble. Fatu snarls, but Andrade DIVES, into a HAYMAKER!

Fatu then SUPERKICKS Miz! Fatu THROWS Miz into barriers! The fans fire up and Fatu grins. Fatu runs in, HIP ATTACK against the barriers! The Samoan Werewolf has dominated three men at once and the fans fire up while SmackDown goes picture in picture.

Miz sputters and Fatu leaves him behind to go around the way. Melo is there to kick Fatu, RAM Fatu, but Fatu blocks another whip! Fatu ROCKS Melo and Melo staggers away. Fatu stalks Melo, Melo checks on Miz, but Fatu ROCKS Melo! Andrade goes after Fatu now, but Fatu THROWS Andrade into barriers! The fans cheer as Fatu lets Andrade go to the ring. Fatu brings Melo up, SMACKS him off the desk, then pushes him down. Fatu clears the desk off, but Melo CLUBS Fatu against the desk! Melo storms into the ring, brings Andrade up, but Andrade RAMS Melo into the corner! Andrade RAMS Melo, CHOPS Melo, then stalks Melo.

Andrade whips Melo, Melo reverses and Andrade hits buckles hard! Melo CHOPS Andrade down! Melo brings Andrade up, soaks up some heat, then makes it Latino Heat. But Andrade blocks the suplex to suplex Melo! Andrade hangs Melo out to dry, and Melo flops to the apron. Fatu is back but Andrade fires forearms first! Andrade whips, Fatu reverses, and Fatu BODY CHECKS Andrade! Fatu geeks out and the fans are with him while he stalks Andrade. Fatu drags Andrade up to HEADBUTT him into the corner. Fatu shoves Melo off the apron, then he HEADBUTTS Andrade again. Andrade sputters but Fatu is all fired up.

Fatu CHOPS Andrade, UPPERCUTS, and HEADBUTTS him again! Andrade CHOPS in return! SmackDown returns to single picture and Andrade CHOPS, CHOPS, CHOPS! Fatu UPPERCUTS and Andrade falls back! Melo stomps Andrade in the corner, then tells Fatu to come on in. Fatu runs up, but Andrade gets away! Hip attack hits buckles! Melo ENZIGIRIS Fatu, Andrade runs to dodge Melo and FLYING FOREARM! The fans fire up as Andrade kips up! Andrade has targets in the corners, and he rallies the fans with “SI! SI! SI!” CIEN KNEES for Fatu! CIEN- NO, Melo tilt-o-whirls and LA MYSTICA! Cover, TWO!

The fans rally, Melo runs to stomp away on Fatu, then he brings Andrade up. Fatu stands to CLOBBER Melo! Andrade SUPERKICKS Fatu! The fans rally, Melo brings Andrade up and springboards, but Andrade stops him at the ropes! SECOND ROPE SPANISH FLY! But Fatu SENTONS Andrade! The fans fire up as Fatu SENTONS Melo! Fatu drags Melo to a drop zone, then goes to the corner! The fans rally for Fatu as he goes up, up, but Andrade YANKS him down! Andrade goes up top, MOONSAULT DOUBLE!! Cover, Melo breaks it! The fans rally while all three are down! “This is Awesome!” as the three stir.

Melo brings Fatu and Andrade around, and he fires forearms on each of them. Andrade fires back on Melo, then Fatu UPPERCUTS! Andrade ROCKS Fatu, but Fatu UPPERCUTS Andrade! The fans rally as the three rise, and Melo springboards! DOUBLE FADE AWAY DDT!! Cover on Andrade, Fatu breaks it! Melo and Fatu stare down, and they run up! Melo dodges to hit the FIRST 48! Andrade adds a POISON-RANA! Melo slips around Andrade to KNEE and suplex, CUTTER! Cover, TWO!! Andrade survives and Melo grows frustrated. The fans rally for Fatu while Melo shakes his hands out. Andrade is on the apron but Melo rises.

Melo brings Andrade up but Andrade trips Melo! They go out to brawl, and Melo SUPERKICKS Andrade down! But Fatu SUPERKICKS Melo! The fans fire up for Fatu as he lines up a shot. Fatu gets the fans even more fired up, then he geeks out! Fatu runs in the full length, but Andrade & Melo move! HIP ATTACK through barriers!! The fans go nuts as Fatu crashes into the timekeeper’s area! Fatu sputters as SmackDown goes back to picture in picture.

Fatu stirs while Andrade and Melo go to the ring. They roll in, Melo grabs at Andrade and vice-versa. Melo fires a forearm, then goes back outside. Andrade goes to the opposite end while Melo looks under the ring. Melo makes Knoxville happy by bringing out a table! But then Melo makes them mad by dropping it! Melo goes after Andrade but Andrade ROCKS him first! Andrade brings out a chair! Andrade aims, but Melo dropkicks the legs out! Andrade crawls, Melo shakes his head, and he grabs the chair now. Melo aims, but Andrade kicks Melo low! Andrade and Melo go into the ring, and Andrade puts Melo in a drop zone.

Andrade goes up the corner, but Melo trips him up! Andrade is stuck up top and Melo hits the SLINGSHOT PLEX! Melo flexes, then decides to step through on the legs! Andrade cradles that, TWO! Melo and Andrade stand, DOUBLE LARIATS collide! Both men fall and the fans look for Fatu. SmackDown returns to single picture as the fans rally, Melo and Andrade sit up, and Melo CHOPS! Andrade ROCKS Melo, then rolls away. Melo hurries to clamp onto Andrade with a facelock, but Andrade RAMS him into a corner! Andrade puts Melo up top but Melo fires forearms. Andrade drops back, Melo aims, but Andrade GAMANGIRIS!

The fans still want tables but Andrade climbs up to get Melo. They’re on the very top, but Fatu is back! Fatu makes the SUPER SPANISH FLY part ROCKER LAUNCHER!! The fans are thunderous as Fatu goes up now! SWANTON BOMB onto Melo! Cover, Andrade breaks it!! The fans rally up again and still want tables. Fatu runs at Andrade to SPLASH! Then Fatu runs at Melo, but Melo BOOTS him! Melo runs up, but into a pop-up! Melo fights the Samoan Drop, and Andrade adds the SHADOW ELBOW! But Melo makes it a ghost pin! Andrade adds a stack, TWO!!! Fatu survives the double cover, but here come Solo & JC!

The fans boo as Solo is here to coach Fatu up. Melo and Andrade trade forearms, then Melo dodges to springboard, FLYING LARIAT! Cover, Fatu breaks it! Fatu snarls, drags Melo up, and he HEADBUTTS Melo! Fatu finally notices Solo & JC, but Fatu puts Melo up top. Fatu CHOPS Melo, then he fireman’s carries Andrade. Fatu adds Melo to this, but Melo slips free. SAMOAN DROP for Andrade, and then Fatu goes to the corner. Solo says Fatu’s got this now! BEST MOONSAULT EVER FLOPS and Melo hits NOTHING BUT NET!! Cover, ANDRADE BREAKS IT! Andrade underhooks Melo, THE MESS- NO, Melo RANAS through! Cover, TWO!!

Andrade has a cover, TWO! Melo has a cover, TWO! Andrade has it, TWO! Both men stand, SHADOW ELBOW! FIRST 48!! SHADOW ELBOW AGAIN!! All three men are down and the fans are thunderous! Fatu crawls, Melo rolls to a corner, and Andrade stirs. Fatu rises, he brings Andrade up, IMPALER DDT! Then Fatu has Melo to RAM him into a corner. Fatu runs and HIP ATTACKS Melo! Andrade is up, Fatu hits him with another IMPALER DDT! Fatu puts Andrade in the drop zone, and he hits the BEST MOONSAULT EVER!! Solo says yeah, do that again! The fans boo but Fatu glares at Solo. JC says do what Solo is saying, Fatu!

But wait! Jimmy YANKS JC down, and SUPERKICKS him! The fans fire up, and then Melo RAMS Fatu into Solo! Then FIRST 48! But Andrade rolls Melo into THE MESSAGE!! Cover, ANDRADE WINS!!

Winner: Andrade, by pinfall (advances to Money in the Bank)

Solo just screwed things up for Fatu! Solo does his best to keep the peace between Fatu and JC, but the point is: Andrade is headed to Los Angeles! Will he make this El Idolo in the Bank?

 

Backstage interview with LA Knight.

Byron Saxton segues from congratulating Andrade for qualifying to welcoming in someone who already has qualified, but The Mega Star says, “My gawd. What is it with punching tickets around here? Everybody talks about punching tickets. WWE Instagram, punched tickets. Commentary, punched tickets. You’re talking about punched tickets. I guess I punched my ticket to MITB, it’s only eight days away. A few other guys who punched tickets, who are they? You got Andrade, you got Penta, you got what’s his name, Seth Rollins. You got Solo Sikoa! They’re all in it! They all punched their tickets!

“And everybody’s gonna be climbing that ladder, trying to get up, put everything on the line that they can. Now, if this was a one-on-one match, I’d go ahead and call my shot, and I’d say I’m gonna run up there, grab the case, and cash it in. But you gotta understand, this is my third year in a row, so I understand what this is. You can call me the vet in this match. Some people say maybe that Seth is the vet in this, but they would be wrong. For three years in a row now, you’re talking about the most robust and the most recent experience, YEAH. And what that means is now it’s anybody’s game. Anybody can come out with it, and I understand that.

“But with or without the case, what you need to understand is that the WWE title, the world title, they’re all in my future. With the way I’ve been running, at this point, they should be in my past, maybe even my present. Why don’tcha go ahead and punch that ticket? While we’re talking about-” Knight stops himself when he spots someone walking in. It’s Aleister Black! And Aleister says that win was supposed to be his. But he tells Knight, “You’re welcome, though.” The Dark Father lets the Mega Star shine, if only for now. Will LA win big in LA when we finally reach MITB?

 

Fatu and Solo regroup backstage.

Solo wants Fatu to listen. He was just trying to help. Fatu tells Solo to listen. For the last time, Fatu does not need his help! Fatu storms off, JC steps in, but Solo has nothing else to say. Is the Samoan Werewolf going to break away from this dysfunctional “family?”

 

Cody Rhodes is here!

Knoxville fires up and sings along, “WHOA~ OH~!” Cody gets his pyro, high-fives fans along the ramp and the front row, and even signs autographs. Cody goes to the ring, grabs a mic, and he hears the fans chant his name. Cody fires the fans up more, then hears them sing, “Cody! Cody Rhooodes~! Cody! Cody Rhooodes~!” Cody says, “So, Knoxville! Whaddya wanna talk about?” The fans cheer, and Cody says, “I’d be remiss if I didn’t point out that we could talk about the record crowd here this evening!” The fans cheer that, too! Cody says he loves them, too, thank you very much.

Cody says they could also talk about WrestleMania 41. The fans boo, but Cody says after WrestleMania 41, he went home, he drowned his sorrows, might’ve touched the “Tennessee Cough Syrup” a little bit, and he had a moment of doubt. He reached out to a friend. A friend who helps him prepare to wonderful audiences like this one here, or speaking to everyone at home. Cody asked him, “Was I a good champion?” The fans cheer for that, but Cody says the friend told him wasn’t quite as simple as yes or no.

The friend told him, “With everything that you faced here in the ring in front of all the fans, and with everything that you faced behind the scenes, being pulled in different directions, the waters that you had to navigate that no champion has ever had to navigate, yes, I feel that you were a good champion.” Cody says he felt good hearing that, it turned into a hopeful moment, the silver lining on a dark cloud. Cody looked back on his whole year. He thought about AJ Styles faking retirement to get the drop on him. Cody thought about his friend, Kevin Owens, sucker punching him against his bus while Cody’s family slept inside.

Cody thought about his boss, Triple H, who pushed Cody to the limit, and sees something in Cody that Cody doesn’t even see in himself. Cody even thought about The Final Boss, how he asked Cody for his soul, and the entire world wondering what that meant. As preposterous as that sounded, The Rock was 100% serious. No matter how many times Cody said no, the offer still stands. And Cody also thought about John Cena. The fans initially boo, but the “Let’s Go, Cena!” “CENA SUCKS!” starts up. Cody takes a moment, and then he says, “I thought about John Cena doing exactly what he said he was going to do. He forced me to make a choice, and I hesitated.

“I don’t know if John Cena is going to ‘ruin’ professional wrestling. But if he does, then I’m partially to blame. Now, I know, I’d love to say this to John Cena’s face. Not sure if he’s going to come out here right now, but if you are listening, if you are listening, Champ, I need you to know that I will never hesitate with you again!” The fans cheer that, and Cody says no matter how much Cena will tout the amount of days he has left, how much Cena will talk about what remains before he absconds with the WWE Championship and leaves all of us forever, that is NOT Cena’s expiration date! That is on the other side of Cody’s corneas, and it will burn Cena’s ass up!

The fans fire up for that, and Cody calms it down. Cody apologizes for that. This is his first night back on SmackDown, he is getting worked up. He thought so much about what he could do, what he could do for the fans. Hell, how about a surprise? The fans already “YEET! YEET! YEET!” so Cody says they’re hungry for it. Let’s yeet. Well, hold on, that’d be a very big surprise. That’d be the biggest surprise. That’d be Cody’s partner riding into battle for MITB, and hell YES he is here! Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for the World Heavyweight Champion, MAIN EVENT JEY USO! The fans go wild as Jey makes his way in from the pavilion!

The fans sing along with Day One Ish and bounce for that YEET! Jey makes his way down through the crowd to ringside, one verse at a time, and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and Jey joins Cody in the ring now, mic in hand. Cody and Jey hear the fans want an encore, so we get even more YEET! But then John Cena makes his entrance to ruin the fun! The fans sing “JOHN CENA SUUUCKS~!” even though he wears that University of Tennessee orange and white. Cena goes to the ring, towel draped over his head, then grabs a mic before he joins Cody and Jey in the ring. Cena hears the fans boo, and he says, “I’m upset, too. If it isn’t professional wrestling’s biggest wannabes!” Cena tells Cody he is nothing more than a Cena Wannabe, and that Jey is nothing more than a Cena Wannabe.

The fans boo but Cena says they both wanna be Cena so bad, it makes him sick! Cody wants Cena’s fame, Jey wants Cena’s money, but they will get neither because Cody is too desperate and Jey is too lazy! There is only ONE other human being in the WWE who embodies hustle, loyalty and respect, and he’s got the fortune, fame and followers to back that up! Surprise, losers! Cena’s partner is here, too! The fans boo already, because “EY YO~!” Logan Paul IS here! The Maverick swaggers his way out, and Cena gives him a proper introduction. “Oh, you mad? You’re mad because Logan Paul does WWE better than any professional wrestler?”

Cena says Logan doesn’t need to pay his dues, because he is paying Jey’s mortgage! Everybody in this building did NOT come to see Jey! They came to see John Cena and Logan Paul! Logan asks, “What the hell you crying about, Knoxville? Look! I could walk on water, and y’all would still find a way to tell me it’s because I can’t swim! John Cena speaks the language of Logan Paul, and that is the truth! The truth! It is right in front of you! You deny it all you want, but look around, you stupid, stupid, simple Tennessee people! This is a moment in history! All of you get to witness the moment that John Cena stood side-by-side in the ring with Logan Paul.

“And look, all of you will live long, pathetic, miserable lives. But at least you will get to say that you saw that.” The fans tell Logan to STFU, and Cena tells Logan to ignore it. Logan says yeah, yeah, they’re so ungrateful. They don’t know what’s good for them. There is one problem, though. This does seem too perfect. The problem is… Logan should be standing next to THE WWE Champion as THE World Heavyweight Champion! Logan should’ve been the one to leave Saturday Night’s Main Event with that title around his waist. But look at him, Jey. Jey got lucky. Jey got lucky! He knows it, Logan knows, it, the fans know it, CODY knows it!

Jey needed Cody to save him! When Cody interfered with the match cuz these two cheaters can’t do a single thing in this business without it being handed to them! “These two nepo babies were born on third, thinking they hit a triple.” Logan points to himself and says, “Self-made man!” He points to Cena and says, “Self-made man!” Five years ago, nobody every would’ve believed Logan Paul would be a WWE superstar. And they certainly never ever would’ve believed that he’d be teaming with the Greatest Of All Time! But look at Logan now. He’s not just a superstar, he is THE superstar! His time is now! Cena told us that his time is almost up!

Cena is the Last Real Champion, Logan is the inevitable face of the WWE! So Jey, Cody, at MITB, if you want some, come get some. Jey tells Logan they don’t gotta wait! They can handle this right now! UH UH, YEET!! The mics drop, Cena and Logan talk this out, and Logan wants to throw hands while Cena wants to leave. Cody asks what they’re arguing about. They gonna go to the back so Logan can polish Cena’s Peacemaker? Now it’s a fight! The fans fire up as the hands are flying! Logan TOSSES Jey, Cena picks Cody up! Cody slips free, Jey is back to SUPERKICK! Cody hits the DISASTER KICK! Cena bails out, Jey PLANCHAS out onto him!

Logan goes to the apron, slingshot and- NO, Cody dodges the “Snapshot” Lariat and Jey SUPERKICKS Logan! Then Jey sets Logan up for the CODE D!! The fans fire up as Cody picks up the WWE Championship! Will Cody and Jey make it through Logan and Cena to then clear a path for the American Nightmare’s redemption? Or will Cena & Logan ruin wrestling together?


My Thoughts:

A very good SmackDown, but maybe with some wheel-spinning. As fun as Chelsea Green continues to be, can’t we move on from her and Zelina? Or are we about to do that with tonight’s win over Alba and then Giulia confronting her? Ironically, that seems to give away Giulia isn’t winning MITB. Giulia had a good promo video right before but they undercut it by giving us that confrontation. That said, Giulia deserves to be all the champions, but I suppose starting with the Women’s US Championship would be a good route. Very good promo from Bianca and Naomi to not just have Bianca’s homecoming, but to keep the feud between them alive.

The Women’s Triple Threat had a slow start but it turned out to be a very good match. Great win for Naomi, and good promo from her, Tiffany and Alexa to tease potential MITB winners. Great stuff in the tag match to build Worlds Collide just a touch. We only got one moment of Berto being passive aggressive towards Santos, and then Ethan Page screwing the Faces over, but that was still enough for the North American Championship. Of course, it depends on how many fans watch not just Raw and SmackDown but also NXT so that the fans already understand the story. But as someone who does, I do appreciate they’re bringing NXT story onto SmackDown.

Good promo from Priest to give some shoot respect to Drew and Fatu, but Priest wanting after the US title kinda gave away what was happening with the Men’s Triple Threat. It was a great Triple Threat, but of course Solo & JC cost Fatu. That team is just one moment away from breaking up, and it might be at MITB when Solo just expects Fatu to help him win the briefcase and Fatu refuses. And Fatu VS Priest will still be awesome whenever it happens. Good promo from Knight, and a good bit from Aleister with him, which I suppose means that’s the next feud for them. Was kinda hoping for Aleister VS Nakamura but that really depends if Nakamura is sticking with WWE or going home to Japan via Pro-Wrestling NOAH as rumored.

R-Truth relapsing to talking to Lil’ Jimmy is certainly a choice. I kinda wish he’d keep up the “Ron Cena” stuff, or they’d let Jeff Cobb do his own John Cena bit from NJPW, but I guess some things in WWE still won’t change. And closing with a big promo segment was also certainly a choice. Cody still did a good job, and nice surprise to have Jey show up. Not sure they needed to take a commercial break for Jey’s entrance, especially when they were obviously going to let Jey do his YEET encore. And Cena really must be brainwashed to put Logan over as if Logan’s on par with peak Cena. But naturally a brawl happened and the Faces stood tall.

Don’t count this as go-home math yet, they could easily revisit this on Raw and even next week on SmackDown. Even then, I still feel like Jey and Cody should win at MITB to properly set up Cody VS Cena 2 at SummerSlam. Raw on June 9th is still the move for the World Heavyweight Championship, but there’s also Saturday Night’s Main Event in July, who knows if Jey makes it to SummerSlam as champion.

My Score: 8.7/10

About Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

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SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast 

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5

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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 5.29.25

Stuff happens, maybe it doesn’t, Dreamer and Delirious can’t book.

Published

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Well Trick Willie is the new TNA champ and this is the first iMPACT since his win…so let’s just hear him talk about it.

Ratings:

  • The Rascalz vs Fir$t Cla$$ vs Laredo vs The System: Rascalz win via Meteora – ***
  • Raj Singh vs Mustafa Ali: Ali wins via…No Shit – Squash Garbage
  • ASH by Elegance vs Lei Ying Lee: Lei wins via Spinning TKO – ** 3/4
  • Mance Warner w/SDL vs Jobber: Mance wins via Hit the Pay Winda – Squash
  • Santino Marella & Arianna Grace vs Robert Stone & Victoria Crawford w/Tessa: Team Robbie wins via shenanigans – **
  • International Championship: Steve Maclin (c) vs Matt Cardona: Maclin retains via KIA – ***

 

Results:

The Rascalz vs Fir$t Cla$$ vs Laredo vs The System

Octagon got jumped by The System earlier so Laredo is fighting alone. Another backstage jumping is getting a little dumb. 

Laredo and Trey start. Typical Indie start with Simultaneous awful Dropkick spot and bad counters, AJ blind tag runs the smaller guys over, tags out to KC and the Rascalz instantly get the moment. KC is rocked, tags in Laredo and Laredo takes out the System before Lish gets on the apron and grabs Laredo. The referee kicks out Lish and Rehwoldt on commentary points out it’s a No DQ match so that’s dumb.

KC gets tossed at AJ, he catches him, Rascalz Dive and do their taunt as we go to commercial. We come back, Tennessee Whiskey into a KC tag in for the near fall on Laredo. Corner combo, Snapmare into Flip Forward Neck Breaker, KC is on a roll. AJ tags Laredo and starts talking crap to KC, they swerve and go Finger Poke of Doom, but it’s not a legal pin. Suddenly tornado attacks, System and Rascalz go for broke, AJ hits the Senton to break the eventual pin, Laredo counters AJ’s Chokeslam attempt. Trey clears out The System, Wentz sends himself and KC over and out, Laredo with a Corkscrew Moonsault, which looked cool but it’s the pile of morons waiting to get hit spot.

AJ hits the Down Payment on Laredo, but Trey blind tagged AJ. Meteora on AJ, Trey pins Laredo and Rascalz win.

Raj Singh vs Mustafa Ali

Raj looks like shit in the gear he came down in…and he wrestles equivalently. I would rather anyone else comeback…give me Anarquia.

Ali murders Raj, Instant Dropkick, Rolling Neckbreaker, Corkscrew Standing Moonsault, it’s not close. Raj tries to counter things but Ali Bellclap, a little Duck the left, connect the right. Raj even does a terrible looking Punch Combo, he’s in bad shape, a bad looking Ushigoroshi, Raj with a sloppy looking something, 450 ends it.

Fire Raj as quickly as you brought him back. You don’t need a comedically pathetic job guy when the roster is like 4 guys getting pushed and everyone else sucks. Stop being stupid. Ali still hates women too.

This Injury Report is the dumbest segment in the history of wrestling. Stop treating fake shit as “serious business”. 

ASH by Elegance vs Lei Ying Lee

ASH mocks karate stuff, Lei throws a few Rising Crane kicks as ASH bails and then things slow down a little. But a Pump Kick, Sliding Kick and Low Dropkick cause ASH to cower and claim her tooth broke. It’s a bait to pull Lei into the turnbuckles and them get in a few stomps. Ash keeps Lei in the corner, Suplexes her ankles into the buckles and then Ash throws a few Booty Shots/Hit Attacks then starts a grounded stretch, Lei Headscissors her down, still sells the hips and ankles, but dodges and fires, combination strikes into the 10 Count Down Strikes. T-bone Suplex, into the pinfall, for only two.

Cheapshot into Running Meteora from ASH for two. Ash goes for the Miz Yes Kicks and Lei No Sells and asks for more. Gorgeous Capture Suplex into Thunder Struck and TKO with flair. My baby has a better finish now! Yay!

Mance Warner w/SDL vs Jobber

Hannifan cursing and being pissed at Trick for not even showing but is more entertaining than a squash match. Not that Mance’s offense is bad, but 2 out of 3 job matches is stupid.

Santino Marella & Arianna Grace vs Robert Stone & Victoria Crawford w/Tessa

Marella tries to tie up with Robbie, but he bails and tags out to Victoria so Arianna comes in and aside from Alicia Fox’s silliness, the tie up was decent with Arianna and Victoria. Tessa interferes and the Referee throws her out. Victoria comes back in and aside from a slight miscommunication with how Arianna does her punches, Alicia Fox is making her look…pretty good. Transition moves, okay brawling and Arianna looks amazing in her outfit.

Rob and Santino distract the referee and Victoria hits a Figure Four into her Northern Lights Suplex, only for 2. Arianna finally Back Body Drop to find the tag, Santino and Rob, Santino does his split dodge into the Standing Headbutt, Arianna Cross Body onto Victoria. Rob pulls out the ref, then shoves the ref into Santino, Santino into the steps and Arianna attack but Alicia and Lish, the fix is in, Arianna eats the pin.

International Championship: Steve Maclin (c) vs Matt Cardona

A few quick brawl moves, Shoulder Tackles, Strikes, Back Breakers, Cardona does get dumped out and eats a SCUD. Maclin bounces Cardona’s face off the apron and hits an Elbow off the apron to keep Cardona reeling, but a dodged tackle sends Maclin into the steps. Cardona tries to Piledriver Maclin on the ramp, but Back Drop counter, into commercial.

Formulaic commercial etiquette of Cardona still in control, throws Maclin into the ropes, Diving Shoulder Tackle lays both dudes out and they get up by 8. Fighting Spirit spot, Cardona hits ropes and gets hit by Maclin twice, Thesz Press, Ground and Pound, Back Elbow and Olympic Slam has Maclin rolling. Splash into Lariat for two. Maclin has been all gas no brakes. Cardona tries to take a few shortcuts that turns into a Straight Jacket Takedown. Cardona to the top, Maclin cuts him off, Superplex spot. 1-2-kick out!

Maclin goes topside for a Jar Headbutt, Cardona hits the ropes so Maclin crashes into the corner, 2 Reboots connect, the third gets caught, counter into Busaiku Knee, Jar Headbutt. In and out, Cardona uses the middle rope for the Low Blow, Killswitch from Cardona but Maclin kicks out. Cardona dodges and shoves Maclin towards the ref, he puts the brakes on, Radio Silence! 1-2-Kick out! Maclin catches a top rope move, Power Bomb, Corner Splash, Tree of Woe, Caught in the Crosshairs, KIA and Maclin retains!

 

Overall Score: 4.5/10

Boring paint by numbers show, no Trick, System has one move, Robert Stone is a scumbag, too long to introduce new girls, lots of throw away segments and Rosemary sets up YET ANOTHER Monster’s Ball match. These aren’t interesting when there’s one every 3 months. So we can have terrible Monster’s Ball matches quarterly, Barbed Wire Massacre and Clockwork Orange House of Fun…BUT NO LOCKDOWN!?

Go home TNA, you’re drunk.

About Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling) 

THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)

FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast 

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5

Classic POD is WAR


Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!

All Shows On Demand


Powered by RedCircle


Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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