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Mitchell’s WWE Wrestlemania 34 Report! (4/8/18)

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OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal (kickoff show): WOKEN Matt Hardy wins.
  • WWE Cruiserweight Championship (kickoff show): Cedric Alexander VS Mustafa Ali; Alexander wins and becomes the new WWE Cruiserweight Champion.
  • Women’s Wrestlemania Battle Royal (kickoff show): Naomi wins.
  • WWE Intercontinental Championship Triple Threat: The Miz VS Finn Balor VS Seth Rollins; Rollins wins and becomes the new WWE Intercontinental Champion.
  • SmackDown Women’s Championship: Charlotte Flair VS Asuka; Charlotte wins and retains the SmackDown Women’s Championship.
  • WWE United States Championship Fatal 4 Way: Randy Orton VS Bobby Roode VS Jinder Mahal VS Rusev; Mahal wins and becomes the new WWE US Champion.
  • Kurt Angle & Ronda Rousey VS Triple H & Stephanie McMahon; Angle & Rousey win.
  • SmackDown Tag Team Championship Triple Threat: The Usos VS The New Day VS The Bludgeon Brothers; Bludgeon Brothers win and become the new SmackDown Tag Team Champions.
  • John Cena VS ???; The Undertaker wins.
  • Daniel Bryan & Shane McMahon VS Kevin Owens & Sami Zayn; Bryan & Shane win, Kevin & Sami are still fired.
  • Raw Women’s Championship: Alexa Bliss VS Nia Jax; Nia wins and becomes the new Raw Women’s Champion.
  • WWE Championship: AJ Styles VS Shinsuke Nakamura; Styles wins and retains the WWE Championship.
  • Raw Tag Team Championship: The Bar VS Braun Strowman & ???; Strowman & Nicholas win and become new Raw Tag Team Champions.
  • WWE Universal Championship: Brock Lesnar w/ Paul Heyman VS Roman Reigns; Lesnar wins and retains the WWE Universal Championship.

PLAY BY PLAY

John Cena promised he’d be at Wrestelmania as a fan, and he is!

The Face that Runs the Place may not be wrestling on the Grandest Stage of Them All, but he’s here to enjoy it for himself, and even take pictures with fans.

 

Carmella joins the Kickoff Panel.

The FABULOUS Ms. Money in the Bank doesn’t want to hear about Asuka’s Streak or Charlotte’s championship, she wants to hear about herself. Carmella is more than ready, #MellaisMoney, but she hasn’t succeeded in chasing in yet. But that’s part of the master plan. Is she cashing in tonight? She won’t confirm or deny, but she first wants to win the inaugural Women’s Wrestlemania Battle Royal. If she had to choose who she’d challenge, would it be Asuka or Charlotte? Who needs to choose a winner when you’ve got one right here in her? Carmella keeps her plans close to the vest, and goes off to prepare. Can/will Carmella win some history tonight?

 

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal!

The Humongous Wonder #8 was the first great titan of the World Wrestling Entertainment, and is honored by this fifth annual edition of the 30 man over-the-top-rope match. With supreme stars the likes of the Devil’s Favorite Demon, the WOKEN Wisdom, and the two-time winning Lone Wolf all competing for this great honor, who will be the last one standing to add their name to the statue’s plaque?

Everyone is in the ring at the start, and the moment the bell rings, it all breaks loose! It is a chaotic brawl as the 30 men work to find someone to go after. Aiden English is thrown out by Zack Ryder, he is ELIMINATED! Tye Dillinger goes after Dolph Ziggler, Heath Slater keeps surviving, and Karl Anderson throws out Konnor! Ziggler survives, WOKEN Hardy survives, and Fandango shovels Curt Hawkins out, Hawkins is ELIMINATED! R-Truth and Goldust make up as pals, and get their groove on, but then Goldust throws Truth out, R-Truth is ELIMINATED! Oh and Goldust dabs on ’em.

Primo Colon survives once, but not twice, he is ELIMINATED by Mike Kanellis. Sin Cara goes after Kanellis, the Revival go after Goldust together. Kanellis is ELIMINATED while the #TopGuys keep each other in. Hardy survives even as the Miztourage goes after them. The Fashion Police work on Corbin but he’s too big and strong for them. The Miztourage go after the Good Brothers, Benjamin knees Tyler Breeze, Breeze is ELIMINATED! Ziggler again survives while Rhyno brawls with Viktor. Viktor backs Rhyno down but Rhyno picks Viktor up. Goldust throws Sin Cara but Sin Cara stays in, Viktor gets thrown out and is ELIMINATED! Ziggler somehow keeps surviving while the Revival beat down Ryder. Sin Cara hits Tye but Tye blocks and clubs him back.

Kane works over Bo but Curt Axel saves him. Hardy takes Goldust and “DELETE DELETE” buckle bumps him over and over. Ziggler goes after Ryder but misses, Ryder is right on him with a “WOO WOO WOO!” Broski- POUNCE from Mojo, Ryder is ELIMINATED! Gable goes after Anderson but the Machine Gun fights him off, only for a rolling kick to knock him down! Anderson is ELIMINATED, and Titus O’Neil works on Luke Gallows. Gallows kicks Titus but Titus boots Gallows, Gallows is ELIMINATED! Titus barks while we go to break.

WWE returns and the Revival throw Apollo out, Apollo is ELIMINATED! Benjamin goes after the Revival, and teeters on the apron, but grabs hold of Dash Wilder! Scott Dawson holds onto Dash to save his tag partner, then hits Benjamin away, Benjamin is ELIMINATED! Rhyno charges in but he is dumped out and is ELIMINATED, then Miztourage throw out the #TopGuys, Dash & Dawson are ELIMINATED! Kane grabs Miztourage and shoves them out, they’re ELIMINATED! John Cena watches from the crowd while Corbin throws Sin Cara! Sin Cara hits the Miztourage and Revival, but he’s still ELIMINATED!

The field has thinned, and Fandango decides to swivel his hips at Kane. Kane uppercuts Fandango right out of the ring, Fandango is ELIMINATED! Slater brawls with Corbin but he’s on the outside, Corbin bumps him off a post, Corbin is ELIMINATED! Kane throws Gable, Gable is ELIMINATED! Corbin and Kane lock eyes, and the fans fire up. But the two big men are surrounded and the others go right at them! Titus, Goldust and Tye keep Corbin down while Mojo, Ziggler and Hardy go after Kane. Titus lashes out on Goldust and Tye, then runs Mojo over, but Ziggler flies in! He’s caught and thrown, but lands on hsi feet to SUPERKICK and clothesline Titus out! Titus is ELIMINATED! But then Ziggler runs into Goldust’s powerslam, and so does Tye.

Goldust puts Tye in a corner and prepares him, but Ziggler pounces on Goldust. Goldust knocks him down for it, then sets him up just like he did Tye. The fans cheer for it, Goldust takes a deep breath, and gives Shattered Dreams to Tye. Goldust runs at Ziggler, Ziggler throws Goldust out, Goldust is ELIMINATED! But Hardy says ‘DELETE! DELETE!” and rocks Ziggler with a haymakers. But then he bumps into Tye and asks, “Who are you?” Ten! Delete! Ten! Delete! Twist of Fate! Tye is thrown and ELIMINATED! But then Kane runs Hardy over!

Kane grabs Ziggler, Ziggler slips out of the choke slam, SUPERKICK! Ziggler leaps for the sleeper, but is thrown out and ELIMINATED! But then Corbin throws Kane out, Kane is ELIMINATED! The Lone Wolf, Mojo Rawley and Hardy are the final three. Mojo pounces while Hardy is busy fighting Corbin. He gives Hardy a huge fireman’s carry slam! Mojo and Corbin stand over Hardy, but the fans are on Hardy’s side. Corbin and Mojo stomp away, and pick Hardy up together, but Bray Wyatt appears?! The Eater of Worlds has returned from the Lake of Reincarnation, and he feeds Mojo to Hardy, Mojo is ELIMINATED! Bray then goes after Corbin, but into End of Days! Corbin goes back to Hardy, fans boo and jeer, but Hardy fights back and dumps Corbin out! Corbin is ELIMINATED! Hardy wins!

Winner: WOKEN Matt Hardy

And it’s thanks to Bray Wyatt! To which, Hardy has the fans applaud the WONDERFUL return of Wyatt. Hardy thanks Wyatt, as do the fans, and they hug! Does this mean there’s some kind of Woken & Wyatt alliance forming?!

 

Cruiserweight Championship: Cedric Alexander VS Mustafa Ali!

205 Live General Manager, Drake Maverick, is here with the title belt to watch as the Heart and the Soul of the Cruiserweight Division battle it out for that very prize!

The bell rings and we begin. The fans are thunderous for them as they high-five and circle. Ali gets the waistlock but Alexander the standing switch and slam. The fans cheer for “Both These Guys!” while Ali gets up and puts on a headlock. Alexander lifts but Ali holds on. Alexander powers out, they collide, Alexander shoulders Ali down on the rebound. He wants Ali to show that heart, and they speed up. Ali headscissors Alexander and then dares Alexander to show the soul. They tie up and go against the ropes and into a corner. Neither man backs down until the referee separates them, then Ali shoves Alexander. Alexander shoves back and dares Ali to hit him.

Ali does with a chop, so Alexander responds with a kick. Alexander whips but Ali kicks him back, so Alexander rolls under and headscissors and dropkicks Ali down. Cover, TWO! Alexander puts Ali right in an armlock, but Ali works his way up and out. Ali whips but Alexander reverses, flapjack dropkick! Alexander staggers, Ali runs in but Alexander puts him on the apron to block a kick and hit a kick. Ali goes down, Alexander builds speed and FLIES! Down they both go, but Alexander is up first. He puts Ali in the ring, covers, TWO! Alexander keeps on Ali with a rear bearhug. Fans rally while Ali endures the squeeze.

Ali gets up and fights out of the hold, rocking Alexander with a forearm. Alexander responds with a running European Uppercut! He whips Ali corner to corner then throws him with a big back body drop. Cover, TWO, but Alexander keeps his cool as he puts Ali back in the bearhug. Ali endures the squeeze while fans rally again. Ali gets up and fights back but Alexander knees low. Alexander chops Ali, then brings him up for a suplex, but Ali slips out. Alexander knees low again, then runs, but into Ali’s lariat. Ali starts to rally and chop, but Alexander reverses the whip. Ali slides to a stop, and intercepts Alexander with a ROUNDHOUSE!

Alexander staggers, Ali rolls in for the facebuster! Cover, TWO!  Ali brings Alexander up, but Alexander blocks and counters with a EuroUpper. Ali yanks his waistband and counters a kick with a kick! He runs, but into Alexander’s Spanish Fly! Both men are down and fans build to a rally. Alexander gets up while Ali gets to a corner. Alexander runs in, but into Ali’s boot. Ali hops up, tornado DDT blocked! Alexander hangs Ali up on the ropes, then catches his breath before climbing up to join him. Fans anticipate something, and Ali resists. They brawl on the top rope, but Alexander gets the better of Ali, only for Ali to almost send Alexander tumbling down with his counter.

They brawl more while trying to stand up, Ali hits Alexander with a SUPER Spanish Fly! Even Cena is stunned seeing that. Cover, TWO, and Ali can’t believe it. He shakes his head as he watches Alexander flounder about. Ali brings Alexander over to a corner but Alexander knows what that means and resists. Ali kicks Alexander, then climbs, but Alexander gets up to throw him off! Maverick and the referee check on Ali after his crash landing, but Ali is still good to go. Alexander waits as the count begins, but Ali dares Alexander to finish him. Alexander takes the bait, he puts Ali in the ring and covers, TWO! He gets frustrated, but tells Ali it’s already over.

Ali shakes his head, it’s not over. Alexander kicks Ali and then stomps away in a rage! He yanks Ali up, back suplex lift but Ali slips out! Ali hits the Reverse-Rana! Alexander is dazed, and Ali gets going. Ali hops up, flying tornado DDT! Alexander lands in a drop zone! Ali goes up, and hits the 0-5-4! Cover, ROPEBREAK! Alexander survives with a foot on the ropes! Ali shouts for Alexander to stay down before he stomps him back. Ali climbs up again, 0-5-4 but Alexander moves! Alexander scrambles up to his feet while Ali drags himself back up. They run at each other, Alexander’s big back elbow rocks Ali, but he still gives another.

Alexander tells Ali “This is enough!” But clearly, it isn’t, and the third back elbow flips Ali over! Alexander lifts Ali up, for the Lumbar Check! Cover, Alexander wins!

Winner: Alexander, by pinfall, NEW WWE Cruiserweight Champion

The Carolina Kid didn’t want to go that far, but he had no choice but to break the Heart of 205 Live. More importantly, Alexander finally proves he can win the big one! Drake Maverick personally presents the belt to Alexander, and the true celebration begins! Now that he finally has what he wanted for so long, will the Age of Alexander have no end?

 

Interview with John Cena.

Cena doesn’t see it as unfortunate that he’s not on the card, he’s having a great time with the other fans. He’s in a #Cenasection, we’re live! Here’s to WrestleMania!

 

Women’s WrestleMania Battle Royal!

With the Women’s (R)Evolution stronger than ever, it was only right that the combined Women’s Division of Raw, SmackDown and even NXT have their own 30 woman over-the-top-rope match. Who will be the first woman to put her name on the plaque for this prestigious and historical moment?

The bell rings and Carmella brags she already has a claim to a title with her Ms. MITB briefcase. But that only gets her jumped by all 29 other women! Well, 28, Lana stays back to “coordinate”. The ladies pick Carmella up and throw her out! She somehow stays up on the apron, but Sonya’s roundhouse ELIMINATES her! Now with 29, Natty singles out Dana Brooke. Dana points out, “That’s not nice!” She and Natty fight, but then the mob takes over and they go after Dana. Mandy throws Dana, and ELIMINATES her! But then Absolution gets too big an ego, and the NXT women stick together to fight the main roster!

Sonya goes after Kairi Sane while Taynara Conti goes after Mandy. Women spill out under the bottom ropes, and the NXT women take charge! Fans join in, chanting “NXT! NXT!” Becky comes back and gets mad at Kavita Devi for wearing orange! Orange is Becky’s color! That aside, the brawl starts all over again, and Devi swings Becky around for a slam. Becky bails out, but Mandy is actually ELIMINATED! Natty turns on Bayley, no more WWE VS NXT. Bianca Belair climbs up, Taynara slams Sonya down, and Dakota and Peyton hold Sonya for Bianca’s EST 450! Then they throw Sonya out, for the ELIMINATION! Ruby Riott goes after the NXT women but that’s a tall order, we go to break.

WWE returns to find more women have spilled out of the ring, and someone ELIMINATES Kairi Sane! Sasha Banks fights her way back in, but NXT continues to work together. They lift Lana up but Lana fights back, only for Bianca to blast her off for the ELIMINATION! Sarah Logan ELIMINATES Devi, then fights with Bianca. The Riott Squad works together on Taynara, big dropkick from Liv Morgan! Becky brawls with Bianca, Dakota stomps on Bayley. Natty has Mickie James while Sasha survives. Bianca whips Becky with her hair! Becky dodges the second try, and throws Bianca to the apron. She bumps Bianca on a buckle and jump kicks, she ELIMINATES Bianca.

But then Dakota rocks Becky with the corner boot! Dakota throws Naomi in a corner, and boots her, too! She aims at Sasha, but Sasha dodges and ELIMINATES Dakota. Ruby goes after Sasha while Mickie throws out Naomi and Becky, for two ELIMINATIONS! Ruby goes after Mickie but ends up on the outside. Sarah goes to help, countering the Mickie-rana. Mickie is on the apron but she fights the Squad off, until Ruby knocks her off for the ELIMINATION! Peyton deals out heel kicks, but Sarah lifts her up for a powerbomb! Ruby and Liv mule kick Peyton, Peyton is ELIMINATED!

Now it’s just Natty and the Riott Squad beating up Bayley and Sasha, but that’s short lived as the Squad go after Natty. Bayley goes after Liv, and Natty blocks the double suplex, to suplex both Sarah and Ruby! Sasha gets up but Natty is on her with a suplex. Bayley helps Sasha, and the “friends” go after Natty. They throw Natty out, for the ELIMINATION! They do the same to Liv, and then club Ruby, Liv and Ruby are ELIMINATED! Sarah goes at them, but Sasha dumps her out. Sarah goes after Sasha, fireman’s carry but Sasha slips out, Bayley hits Sarah for the ELIMINATION! The final two are Bayley and Sasha!

The fans are thunderous for the Legit Boss and Huggable One. Sasha asks for a handshake, Bayley gives it, to then throw and ELIMINATE Sasha!! But Bayley didn’t realize there’s one last woman, who didn’t go over the top rope. Naomi returns, and Bayley’s upset. They go at each other, REAR VIEW! Naomi throws Bayley for the ELIMINATION!

Winner: Naomi

Bayley and Sasha are both frustrated, furious even, but it doesn’t matter, because it’s #GlowTime!

 

WWE lets the good times roll in the Big Easy, again.

WrestleMania has many names, from the Grandest Stage of Them All to the Showcase of the Immortals, to the biggest night in sports entertainment. But in the end, one thing is for certain: it is where history is made, where stars are born, and moments live forever. Who will make moments of their own on this grand stage? Who will become immortalized? Most importantly, who will win?!

 

WWE Intercontinental Championship Triple Threat: The Miz VS Finn Balor VS Seth Rollins!

The good times begin with fire and intensity as both The Architect and The Extraordinary Man look to take the title off of the Hollywood A-Lister before he can set the record as longest reigning IC Champion in history! Will Rollins #BurnItDown? Will Finn make the title #TooSweet? Or will The Miz shock them both and hold on to history? Miz makes one surprising decision already: he sends the Miztourage to the back, because he believes he has this well in-hand by himself.

The bell rings and we begin. Fans are thunderous already while Miz, Rollins and Finn approach each other. Miz goes for Finn, Finn gets around for the waistlock but Rollins goes after Finn from behind. Finn lets go of Miz and powers out of Rollins’ headbutt, Rollins knocks miss down. Rollins goes back after Finn but Finn arm-drags him away. Miz grabs Finn but Finn arm-drags him, too. Rollins rolls up Miz but Finn rolls up Rollins then Miz rolls up Finn! TWO, Rollins clotheslines Miz out but Finn rolls Rollins, TWO. Rollins goes after Finn, but Finn avoids the stomp to roll, only for Rollins to roll through and mule kick Finn. Rollins runs but Finn clotheslines him out to join Miz, then Finn FLIES!

Finn wipes Rollins and Miz out, then gets up to flex. The fans cheer, “Too Sweet! Woop Woop!” for Finn as he puts Miz in the ring. Miz kicks back, then whips but Finn reverses. Miz sunset flips but Finn rolls through to basement dropkick, cover, TWO. Finn goes at Miz in a corner with chops, then whips corner to corner but Miz reverses. Finn goes up and over, Rollins flies in for the flying lariat! Miz throws Rollins to a corner then boots Finn down. Cover, TWO! Miz whips Finn at Rollins but Rollins elbows Finn away then boots Miz. Rollins hops up and hits them both with the blockbuster! Cover on Miz, TWO!

Rollins keeps on Miz with a corner forearm smash, then brings him up for the suplex. Miz slips out and goes for the Finale but Rollins elbows out to run, but into Miz’s kitchen sink knee. Miz runs and hits his signature corner clothesline on Finn, then he climbs up to bring Rollins down with the double ax handle. Cover, TWO, but Miz gets Rollins right in a chinlock. Fans rally while Rollins endures. Finn gets up, Miz throws Rollins at him, but Finn gets aside. Miz catches Finn into the A-List combination of backbreaker and, after booting Rollins away, NECKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Miz puts Finn in a seated cobra clutch, but Finn endures.

Fans rally and Finn fights his way up, only for Miz to wrangle him back down. Finn gets up again, pries his way out, but Miz knees low. Miz whips Finn to a corner, but Finn boots him back. Finn runs out to rally with forearms, then catches Miz into the takedown and double stomps. Finn flexes again, then chops Miz. Corner to corner whip, but Miz boots Finn. Miz hops up, Finn swing kicks and sends Miz down! Rollins returns, he blocks the slingblade and runs to hit his SLINGBLADE! Finn bails out of the ring, Rollins builds speed, and DIVES! Rollins keeps going, hitting Miz with a DIVE! Rollins won’t stop, he sees Finn return into the ring, but runs into Finn’s SLINGBLADE!

Finn takes aim, but runs into a SUPERKICK! Miz returns, low DDT to Rollins! Cover, TWO, and a close one! All three men are down but stirring. Miz is up first, followed by Rollins. Rollins goes to boot but Miz deflects that leg to kick it. Miz wants the Figure Four but Rollins shoves him away. Rollins runs in but Miz puts him on the apron, so he hits back. Rollins springboards but Miz boots him down to the floor! Miz runs at Finn, blocks that swing kick and dragon screws it! Miz spins, Figure Four! Finn endures, reaches for ropes, but has to sit up to avoid a cover. Finn reaches back, drags himself over, Rollins Frog Splash outta nowhere! Cover, TWO!

All three men down again, and fans already declare “This is Awesome!” Rollins looks at Miz and Finn on the outside, and slips out to join them. He hobbles over to Miz, then tells crew to move out of the way. Rollins brings Miz up, powerbomb position, but Finn runs on the apron! Rollins blocks the Penalty Kick, then grabs Finn and heads for barriers! Finn slips out the back, and slingblades Rollins to the ground. Finn then runs at both Rollins and Miz, 2-for-1 dropkick blasts them into the timekeeper’s area! He picks Rollins up and into the ring, drags him up in the sleeper hold, but Rollins knees out of the lift.

Finn fires off strikes, Rollins hits back, Finn returns, but Rollins grabs him in the wristlock, only for Finn to counter the Revolution Knee with a forearm. Rollins PELE, Finn PELE! Finn drags Rollins up, for 1916! Cover, TWO! And Finn can’t believe it! He keeps going, putting Rollins in a drop zone before climbing up. Miz returns and attacks Finn, then climbs up to join him. Miz prepares but Finn resists the superplex, and Rollins gets up. Rollins grabs Miz, for a corner to corner buckle bomb! Then he goes back to Finn, SUPERPLEX roll through to Falcon– Small package, TWO! Miz hurries, FINALE on Rollins! Cover, TWO!?

Fans are again thunderous as some hope these three “Fight Forever!” Miz sits up, as does Finn. Miz grabs Finn but Finn arm-drags, takedown but Miz avoids the stomps. Full-nelson but Finn victory rolls, TWO! Finn staggers to his feet, then avoids Miz in the corner for the swing kick. Miz goes down, Finn climbs up, but Miz trips him up. Miz throws hands while climbing up to join Finn. Finn fights back, hitting those battered ribs. Finn gets Miz in the dragon sleeper, but Rollins runs in to kick Finn! Rollins then goes to the outside before climbing up. Rollins jumps up but Miz catches him into a SUPER Finale!!

Miz crawls to a cover, but Finn uses his Coup De Grace to break it!! Rollins rolls out of the ring, and Finn fires up. Finn limps as he walks it off, but takes aim at Miz. Miz slowly stands up, Finn runs in, SLINGBLADE! Blasting dropkick! Finn climbs up again, COUP DE GRACE! Cover, but Rollins is back, Curb Stomp!! Rollins stomps the mat, wanting someone to get up. Miz does, CURB STOMP! Cover, Rollins wins!!

Winner: Seth Rollins, by pinfall; NEW Intercontinental Champion

Not only that, but Rollins is also a WWE Grand Slam Champion as he finally tags off the IC title! The Architect joins his Shield brothers, Roman Reigns and Dean Ambrose, among others. With this victory, is Rollins back to being The Man?

 

SmackDown Women’s Championship: Charlotte Flair VS Asuka!

“To be the Woman, you’ve got to beat the Woman.” The Empress of Tomorrow knows that much, and pits her undefeated streak against the Queen of Flair’s title! Which woman will make the other bow to them as THE Woman of SmackDown?

The bell rings, the fans are thunderous, and the two circle. They tie up, Asuka goes for the arm, but Charlotte reverses the hold. Asuka uses the ropes to flip through the reversal but Charlotte rolls to do the same, but Asuka kicks out a leg. Charlotte gets up and cartwheels to break free and shove Asuka. Charlotte styles and profiles, then they tie up again. Asuka kicks then puts Charlotte in a headlock. Charlotte powers out and things speed up, Charlotte trips Asuka but Asuka rolls her, TWO. Asuka hits Charlotte with a sliding knee, cover, TWO. Charlotte and Asuka back off but the fans applaud.

Asuka taunts Charlotte as she sits in the corner. Charlotte comes out, but Asuka gets her in a takedown and double stomps. Asuka runs, but Charlotte catches her, only for Asuka to victory roll, TWO. Charlotte chops Asuka with the Flair family chops, backing Asuka into a corner. Charlotte whips Asuka corner to corner but Asuka reverses, so Charlotte tumbles to the apron. Asuka runs over, avoids the shoulder and gives kicks back. Asuka runs again, and hip attacks Charlotte to the barriers! The referee checks on Charlotte while Asuka dances in the ring. Asuka looks down at Charlotte and points to the shoulder, taunting Charlotte with the fact she now has a target.

Charlotte gets up and back into the ring, but Asuka is on that shoulder with kicks. Asuka wrangles Charlotte down with an arm-wringer, then an armlock. Fans duel between the two while Asuka grinds Charlotte’s arm. Charlotte rolls and forearms out of the hold, but Asuka hits back with a knee. Asuka runs in, but into the backbreaker and STO from Charlotte! Charlotte grabs Asuka, Asuka turns things around, but Charlotte resists the hold. Asuka hops up onto Charlotte, but Charlotte runs for the backpack stunner! Charlotte runs in and turns Asuka around to forearm away on the back. Asuka elbows back, but Charlotte yanks Asuka in to drop the knee on her head!

Charlotte keeps going, another Flair knee drop. Asuka is down, so Charlotte climbs up. MOONSAULT! But Asuka catches her into a triangle hold!! Asuka has her, but Charlotte hammers away with fists. Charlotte gets free, and puts Asuka in a Boston Crab! Asuka endures the hold, crawls and pops out, cover, TWO, Charlotte covers, TWO! The fans are loving this, even as Charlotte and Asuka glare at each other. Asuka hits first and fast, then yanks Charlotte’s bad arm into the ropes. She keeps going, kicking Charlotte back into the ring. Cover, TWO, and Asuka grows frustrated. She stalks Charlotte, going after that bad arm and kicking Charlotte right in the face.

Charlotte ends up in a corner but Asuka keeps kicking. Charlotte blocks one to shove Asuka down, but that bad arm slows her down. Asuka trips Charlotte up, then runs, hip attack misses, Charlotte’s boot hits! They’re both on the apron, and Charlotte brings Asuka up, but Asuka resists the suplex. Asuka shoves Charlotte, then kicks her into the post. Asuka grabs Charlotte now, for a suplex to the floor! Both Queen and Empress crash land! The referee checks on them, but they’re somehow okay to continue. He starts a ten count, but neither stirs before 7. Asuka gets up into the ring, Charlotte follows at 9! Charlotte crawls towards Asuka, Asuka grabs her hair, and then unloads a strike fest!

Asuka fires up, climbs up, and hits Charlotte with a missile dropkick. Cover, TWO, but close. Asuka stands on Charlotte for stomps as she holds the arms back. She drags Charlotte over to a corner and kicks her while climbing up. Charlotte fights back and chops away on Asuka! Charlotte then climbs up, for a SUPER SPANISH FLY! Cover, TWO!! Asuka survives and Charlotte can’t believe it. Fans know “This is Awesome!” Asuka stands up, Charlotte hits Natural Selection– No, Asuka uses that to put on a grounded Octopus stretch! Asuka bends Charlotte all sorts of ways, Charlotte tries to escape, but Asuka rolls through to keep it!

Charlotte suddenly pops and goes for Figure Four but Asuka kicks here away! Charlotte blocks the roundhouse and unloads chops, but Asuka uses that to flip her over, Asuka Lock attempted! Asuka has the top, but Charlotte stands up. Asuka jumps for body-scissors and brings Charlotte down, but Charlotte rolls through to make it a cover! TWO! Buzzsaw kick from Asuka! Asuka won’t let her Streak end, but she runs into a SPEAR! Cover, TWO! Charlotte knows she’s close, but she’s growing frustrated and desperate. The fans fire up as she goes for the Figure Four, and gets it! Charlotte bridges, it’s the FIGURE EIGHT!

But Charlotte can’t keep her bad arm extended, she has to use just one arm. Even so, she holds on, and Asuka taps!! Charlotte wins and ends The Streak!!

Winner: Charlotte, by submission; still SmackDown Women’s Champion

It finally happened! After 914 days, someone defeats The Empress! And it’s none other than The Queen! Will this propel Charlotte’s legacy into a new level of prestige?

Asuka, no longer undefeated, stands up and calls Charlotte over. The Empress tells New Orleans, “Charlotte was ready for Asuka! Congratulations.” Then the two warriors hug! Though she is no longer undefeated, there is still so much for Asuka. Will she find a way back to a WWE Women’s Championship?

 

A referee rushes over to John Cena.

He’s telling Cena something. A match? John Cena thinks he’s joking, but the ref swears it’s true. Cena jumps the rails and hurries backstage! Is it to meet who Cena hopes it is?!

 

WWE United States Championship Fatal 4 Way: Randy Orton VS Bobby Roode VS Jinder Mahal VS Rusev!

The Viper has a tall order holding onto the title when he’s going up against The GLORIOUS One, the Modern Day Maharaja and the Bulgarian Lion! Will he retain? Or will one of the top level contenders take the title away on this GLORIOUS Rusev Day~~~?

The bell rings and all four men circle each other. Mahal swings on Orton but avoids an RKO, Roode clotheslines him out. Rusev throws Orton out then goes after Roode, hitting him with a dropkick. Fans chant “RUSEV DAY! RUSEV DAY!” and Rusev builds speed, but runs into Mahal’s forearm. Rusev hits back with a clobbering haymaker, then takes aim from the apron, Bulgarian bowling ball! He wipes out Mahal and Orton, then goes back into the ring to embrace all the cheers. Rusev puts Roode back in, Roode rolls him up, TWO. Rusev whips Roode but Roode boots back. Roode hops up, GLORIOUS Blockbuster! Cover, TWO, and Mahal returns.

Roode is ready, and he punches on Mahal. Orton adds on, and they both throw Mahal out. Roode chops Orton, then whips, but Orton ducks to hit Roode with the powerslam! TWO, and Roode gets away to the apron. Orton stalks him, but Roode shoulders back in. Roode climbs up but Orton punches him down. Orton climbs up, and hits Roode with a SUPERPLEX! The landing is hard, but Orton covers, only for Rusev and Mahal to break it. Mahal and Rusev stare down, but Mahal grins. He says they should work together to work over Orton. Rusev doesn’t trust Mahal, he clubs and stomps Mahal in a corner! It’s a Rusev Day Mudhole!

Rusev brings Mahal up, swinging side slam! Cover, TWO, but Rusev keeps his cool while Mahal bails out of the ring. Rusev leaves him be and goes after Orton, but Orton fights him off, back suplex on the barriers! Mahal boots Orton, then enters the ring, into a GLORIOUS Spinebuster! TWO, but Roode keeps his cool. Roode stalks Mahal, winds it up, and gives the GLORIOUS Pose! He kicks, Mahal back drops but Roode sunset flip, Orton just breaks it! Orton puts Roode right into a post! Orton sees Rusev crawling up and drags him between the ropes. Rusev knows that too well, he shoves Orton away and roundhouses him down!

Rusev rams a barreling shoulder in the corner before he gets running, only for Orton to drop under his windmill kick! Rusev hits mat and rolls out of the ring, but Orton is upon him again, for the draping DDT! Orton hears the fans, but also hears the voices in his own head. He stalks Rusev, but Aiden slips in! Aiden takes the RKO! Rusev MACHKA Kick, but Orton dodges to RKO Rusev! Mahal runs in with a knee, but he misses, and ends up in an RKO! Cover, but Roode breaks it. Roode throws Rusev out, and blocks an RKO, for the GLORIOUS DDT! Cover, but Mahal breaks it. Rusev returns, MACHKA KICK to Roode!

Mahal dodges the roundhouse, rolls up, TWO, the roundhouse hits this time. The fans are thunderous for “RUSEV DAY! RUSEV DAY!” And Rusev hears them as he prepares to MACHKA! He stomps Mahal, brings him up, but Sunil Singh gets on the apron. Rusev lets Mahal go, Mahal dodges and the MACHKA KICK hits Sunil! Mahal goes for the KALLAS! Cover, Mahal wins!

Winner: Jinder Mahal, by pinfall; NEW United States Champion

The Modern Day Maharaja uses the chaos, as well as Sunil, as a means to an end once again, and is WWE US Champion for the first time in his career. Mahal ruins RusevMania along with Orton’s Grand Slam reign, will he reign as he did when he was WWE Champion?

 

Kurt Angle & Ronda Rousey VS Triple H & Stephanie McMahon!

The roots of this feud were planted way back at WrestleMania 31 when Rousey and Stephanie had a physical encounter alongside The Rock and Triple H. But now, three years later, Rousey signs with the WWE, but not to be The Authority’s property. Can the Baddest Woman in the Planet win her WWE debut alongside the Olympic Gold Medalist?

HHH gets in Angle’s face while Rousey is ready to get at Steph. HHH then says something to Rousey, and while Rousey is distracted, Steph pie-faces her! Angle keeps Rousey back, but then Steph yanks Rousey down by her hair! The bell rings and Rousey really wants at Steph, but Steph gets to her corner for safety. Angle keeps Rousey back, but then sees HHH’s sucker punch coming. Angle punches back, then whips but HHH reverses, only for Angle to come out and clothesline HHH down. The fans cheer for Angle as he punches on HHH more, then stomp him in a corner. HHH staggers while the fans let Angle know, “You Still Got It!”

Angle whips HHH to a corner, then back body drops him on the rebound. Angle brings HHH up for the arm wrench, then wrenches again. HHH endures the hammerlock, but fans say, “We Want Ronda!” Angle keeps on HHH, but Steph fakes getting in to bait Rousey. The ref is busy with Rousey while HHH whips Angle, and Steph holds down ropes to send Angle tumbling out of the ring! Stephanie plays innocent while HHH goes after Angle, whipping the Raw GM into steel steps! HHH taunts Rousey, which gives Stephanie time to bump Angle off the steps! Rousey wants after Steph but the ref keeps her in her corner.

HHH suplexes Angle back into the ring, then rains right hands down on him. He stalks Angle to the ropes then puts him into the corner to choke him more. Stephanie stays back, until the ref pulls HHH off, then she chokes Angle deeper. HHH throws hands but Angle blocks and counters. The two legends brawl, HHH whips and spinebuster for Angle! Cover, TWO! Fans rally for Angle, and he reaches for Rousey, but HHH is on him with a sleeper hold. HHH powers Angle back, but Angle powers HHH back! Angle reaches but HHH whips him away to his corner. Angle boots HHH down, and crawls for his corner, but Stephanie grabs him!

Steph holds him for HHH, HHH swings but Angle ducks, and HHH almost hits Stephanie! The Authority freezes, deja vu from last year, so Stephanie decides to hop down off the apron. HHH brings Angle up, but gets a saido suplex! Both men are down, and Rousey reaches for Angle. Angle fires himself up and heads for his corner, but Stephanie yanks Rousey off the apron! Stephanie is proud of herself that Angle can’t tag out. HHH goes for the Pedigree but Angle reverses and whips him all the way out! Rousey returns, and Stephanie shouts for HHH! Angle crawls, and tags in Rousey!

Rousey goes right at Stephanie and brings her into the ring! Rousey rallies on Stephanie, judo slam! She’s not done there, she unloads strikes all over Stephanie in a corner! Then she throws Stephanie by her hair! Stephanie begs for mercy, but gets none as Rousey throws her with an exploder! Rousey stalks Stephanie, even as she begs. Stephanie looks for HHH, but Rousey grabs those arms and monkey flips Stephanie to a mount. Rousey toys with Stephanie a bit before going to the armbar, but Stephanie desperately blocks it! They struggle with each other, Stephanie goes after Rousey’s eyes! Rousey lets go of the hold, and Stephanie goes to her corner, but there’s still no one to tag.

Stephanie looks back at Rousey and kicks her right in the face, DDT! Cover, TWO! Rousey is dazed and Stephanie keeps on her with a half surfboard. Stephanie digs her foot into Rousey’s back, but Rousey powers up, only to be thrown down by her hair again. Stephanie kicks and toys with Rousey, even mocking Rousey. Rousey grabs her by the throat! Rousey glares death at Stephanie before lifting her up in the fireman’s carry, and hitting a side-winding Samoan Drop! Cover, but HHH drags the referee out of the ring! Rousey protests, but then says she’s gonna continue beating up HHH’s wife. But then HHH yanks Rousey out of the ring?!

Angle comes back and goes after HHH! He bounces HHH off the announce desk, then climbs up on it with him. Angle wants a German Suplex, but HHH blocks! HHH turns around and tosses Angle down onto the Spanish announce desk. Angle tumbles to the floor, and HHH returns to the ring. He walks over to Stephanie, checking if she’s okay. But Rousey’s up! And she’s ready to fight HHH! Fans fire up, they want to see this! The referee says this isn’t how mixed tags work, but HHH doesn’t care, he’s in charge. He tells the ref it’ll be okay, and then circles with Rousey. Rousey throws fast and furious hands on HHH and backs him into a corner!

Rousey runs, catches his boot, and jackknife rolls to the fireman’s carry! Rousey has HHH up, but Stephanie returns to save him, and she SLAPS Rousey! That was bad. Stephanie runs away but Rousey chases her! Rousey grabs Stephanie and throws her into barriers! Rousey drags Stephanie up, but Stephanie slips down to bounce Rousey off the post! HHH is up, but so is Angle! Angle gets HHH in a belly2belly! Then another, and the whip. HHH smashes Angle on his knee, but runs into a German Suplex! Angle holds on and hits another German, then another for the hat trick. The fans fire up, Angle goes for his slam but HHH slips out!

Angle hits a take down to the ankle lock, but HHH shoves out! HHH kicks low but Angle blocks the Pedigree into a catapult! ANGLE SLAM!! Cover, TWO! So Angle brings the straps down. He grabs the leg, and the Ankle Lock, but Stephanie comes in and pulls Angle off. She blames Angle for all of this mess, and kicks at Angle, but he grabs her foot. The referee reminds Angle of the mixed tag rules, but the fans want to see this. Angle does, too, Ankle Lock on Stephanie!! But HHH returns, and he gets Angle with the Pedigree! Cover, Rousey barrels in to break it! HHH can’t believe it, but the fans know “This is Awesome!”

HHH grabs Rousey, and prepares another Pedigree, but then decides for a powerbomb, which Rousey reverses into a huricanrana! And then the armbar!! HHH flails around and the fans are going wild! Stephanie comes in and grabs Rousey in a sleeper! She thrashes Rousey around, but Rousey stands up to throw Stephanie off, for the armbar!! Angle intercepts HHH with the ANKLE LOCK! HHH crawls and holds Stephanie’s hand to prevent any tapping, then he slings Angle into Rousey! Everyone is down but the fans are thunderous. Angle is first to get up, followed by HHH. HHH shoves Angle into the post, then Stephanie gets up to do the same to Rousey.

The Authority regroups and decides to finish this. HHH kicks Angle, Steph drags Rousey up, they want double Pedigrees! But Angle dumps HHH out, and Rousey dumps Stephanie for another armbar! Stephanie holds on for dear life, but Rousey just positions herself on top of Stephanie. Rousey asks Stephanie what she should’ve said from the start. Stephanie cries, “SORRY!” Rousey says it’s too late, and puts on the ARMBAR! Stephanie taps, Rousey & Angle win!

Winners: Angle & Rousey, Rousey by submission

Rowdy Ronda Rousey has her first WWE victory, and on the Grandest Stage of Them All! With such a major win on such a major PPV, is there no limit to what she can do?

 

SmackDown Tag Team Championship Triple Threat: The Usos VS The New Day VS The Bludgeon Brothers!

Awwwwww NOLA! Don’t you dare be sour, clap for this incredible tag title match, and feel, the POWER! Kofi Kingston, Xavier Woods and Big E had an amazing tag feud with Jimmy & Jey in the past, but now add the destruction Harper & Rowan are capable of, who will come out of the Uso Penitentiary with the gold?

But before the bell, or even before the Bludgeon Brothers enter the ring, Kofi and Jey dropkick them away. Then Trouble in Paradise! Cover, but Harper & Rowan drag Kofi out of the ring. They shove Kofi away, then boot him down. Jimmy flies in, but Rowan catches him to snake eyes him off the apron. Harper & Rowan back off to then double boot Jimmy into the steel steps. They take aim at Big E at the barriers, Harper whips Rowan to whip Harper full steam ahead into Big E! Harper feeds Big E to Rowan’s body check! The referee tries to get order, but the Bludgeon Brothers target Woods. Woods isn’t part of the match, but he’s still here…

Woods throws a kick but that’s all he gets before Harper hammers him down. Harper gives Woods to Rowan, and Rowan lifts Woods, to powerbomb him into the post! That spine is still healing from the bomb on the steps at Fastlane. Harper & Rowan get Kofi in the ring and Rowan gives both Kofi and Jey a big splash. Rowan lifts Jey and actually tags Harper in, before dumping Jey right out. The Bludgeon Brothers stalk Kofi, bring him up, but see Big E coming. They knock Big E away, then see Jimmy. Rowan runs but Jimmy dumps him out, apron kick! Jimmy hits Harper, runs and SUPERKICKS, then mule kicks and uppercuts.

Jimmy wants another kick but Harper blocks it, to shove Jimmy at his corner. Jey tags in, and they both get clear of Harper. Double swing kicks in the corner, then another! Harper staggers, Jimmy tags back in. Jey SUPERKICKS Harper while Jimmy climbs up, then Jimmy leaps for the USO SPLASH! Cover, TWO! Jimmy can’t believe it, but he tags Jey back in. They go to opposite corners, but Rowan yanks Jimmy off. Jey jumps but into Harper’s hands. Jey breaks free and dragon whip kicks Harper, then Big E outta nowhere lifts Harper. Rowan saves Harper and clubs Big E down. Jey SUPERKICKS Rowan, Jimmy returns and together, the Usos DIVE on Rowan!

But Rowan catches them both in each hand! The Usos break free, and double suplex Rowan to the floor! Big E has Harper, scooping him right up, and then tags Kofi. Harper slips out and throws Big E out of the ring. He gets under Kofi’s jump, and catches Kofi into the SCRAPBUSTER! Kofi writhes but Harper isn’t done with that. He drags Kofi back up, and climbs to the top rope with him. Big E returns and saves Kofi. Harper boots Big E away but the Usos return, double SUPERKICKS! The Usos climb up to go after Harper, Big E adds on, but then Rowan runs in and blasts them all! The Usos fly to the floor while Rowan throws Big E out, but Kofi dropkicks Rowan out!

Kofi goes back to Harper, leaping up, but being knocked away. Rowan has Kofi, powerbomb! Harper wants his, and Rowan full nelson lifts Kofi to Harper, for the SUPER Killer Bomb!! Cover, Bludgeon Brothers win!

Winners: The Bludgeon Brothers (Harper & Rowan, Harper pinning); NEW SmackDown Tag Team Champions

The destroyers of tag teams finally have the titles and SmackDown’s Tag Team Division will never be the same.

 

John Cena heads to the ring?!

And dressed to compete?!

John Cena VS ???

But wait, another referee jogs down to the ring and tells Cena something new. And Cena gets mad! Fans are chanting “Undertaker!” because that’s what we expect, but from the way Cena’s acting, it’s not happening? Cena leaves the ring, but then the lights go out!! Because it’s Elias… The Drifter is NOT who anyone expected or wanted, but he still asks New Orleans to silence phones, hold applause and shut mouths. Elias plays his guitar while he walks the ramp, but fans boo and jeer. Sorry, were they expecting someone else? Elias says that that somebody else isn’t as athletic as Elias, isn’t as charismatic as Elias, and isn’t doesn’t have the talent Elias does.

And if Cena thought this was going to be another walk in the park, think again. Elias enters the ring, and wants Cena to give him the ring. The Drifter looks at the 75k people who paid to see Elias, go ahead and sit down, Cena. Cena returns to his seat while Elias plays his WrestleMania song. “It’s WrestleMania, and John wants a fight. I’m not what he expected, but guess what? It’s Elias’ night.” Elias has traveled the world, “and found this truth: John Cena Sucks, because he’s like all of you!” Cena’s had enough, he goes after Elias! He hits the shoulder tackles and the spin-out bomb. Then “You Can’t See Me”, and Five Knuckle Shuffle! Cena gets Elias up, AA!

Elias gets out of the ring, and Cena kicks his guitar. Cena cleans up the ring, fed up with this. Fans chant for “Undertaker!” again, and Cena almost expects something. But no, nothing from the Deadman. Cena decides to still stand on the post and give a point to the fans, but he goes back up the ramp, mood deflated. The music stops, and Cena thinks. And the lights go out again! Cena looks around in the dark, and smoke starts to billow up. Undertaker’s hat, jacket and boots are in the ring! Cena sees this ominous message, and the lightning that strikes the ring! The hat, jacket and boots are gone? And the bell tolls!! The flames, and the lights! Can it be?! IT IS!

The Undertaker is in New Orleans! He walks down the ramp to meet Cena in the ring, and Cena has no idea what to make of it. Wait, this is happening?! The bell rings and it begins! Taker goes right at Cena, throwing hands in the corner like he never lost a step! He backs the referee down, then goes back to Cena to whip him corner to corner. Cena reverses but runs into a boot. Taker runs, leaping lariat! He grabs Cena while fans chant “You Still Got It!” Taker rams Cena down with a shoulder, then brings him over, for Old School! Cena gets to a corner, Taker runs in, corner clothesline! Taker goes back and runs in again for another, then scoops Cena.

Snake Eyes! BOOT and the leg drop! Taker prepares the choke slam, grabs Cena around the throat, but Cena pops out. Cena lifts Taker for the spin-out powerbomb! Cena stands over Taker, “You Can’t See Me”– Taker sits up! And grabs Cena, for the Choke Slam! Taker brings the straps down, and slashes the throat. He scoops Cena, for the Tombstone!! Cover, Taker wins!!

Winner: The Undertaker, by pinfall

The Deadman wins, like back in his prime! He might even be better than ever. Is this a new era for the Phenom?

 

WWE again honors the Hall of Fame Class of 2018.

From the Dudley Boyz to Ivory to Hillbilly Jim, Jeff Jarrett, “JJ” Jarius and Goldberg, New Orleans cheers for the living legends and heroes that inspire us all.

 

Daniel Bryan & Shane McMahon VS Kevin Owens & Sami Zayn!

The SmackDown GM fight for his dream, and he has it back! He can again compete in a WWE ring! But he must use his return to settle the grudge that formed between him, Shane O’Mac and two men he once called friends. If the Prizefighter and The Underdog win this match, they’ll have their jobs back! Can Bryan & Shane prevent that, even if it risks their bodies to do it? But if you expected Kevin & Sami to play fair, think again! They blindside Team YE$ from behind! Shane goes down out of the ring and Sami pursues while Kevin stomps on Bryan. Sami throws Shane out into the crowd, right by Shane’s family!

Kevin throws Bryan into barriers, then brings Bryan up to feed to Sami’s HELLUVA Kick! Sami brings Bryan up, saying, “This is your fault.” He gives Bryan to Kevin, and they give Bryan an APRON POWERBOMB! Bryan crumples to the floor and the referee backs them off. This match hasn’t even officially started, not that Kevin & Sami care. Sami & Kevin go into the ring while Shane returns from the crowd. Shane checks on Bryan, and orders they bring medics down. Another ref comes and brings the medic, but Kevin & Sami say, “He made us do that!” “This is on you, Shane!” Shane sees the situation he’s in, but still wants to fight. The main ref backs Sami & Kevin up, and Shane orders for the bell. The bell rings, and Shane starts against Kevin.

Shane gets a shot in on Sami then unloads on Kevin in a corner! Shane punches and punches and punches, but backs off at the ref’s request. He keeps Kevin off balance, whips him, and runs him over with a big back elbow. But Shane’s stomach is bothering him. Shane still gets shots in on Sami, body shots and elbows, then a bicycle kick to Kevin. Sami runs at Shane but into a DDT. Shane’s stomach slows him down again, and Kevin pounces with kicks and stomps. A stretcher is brought for Bryan while Kevin stomps on Shane more. Kevin mocks the healing hernia, then tags in Sami.

Sami stomps Shane while fans cheer for Bryan. Sami keeps Shane down, then whips him for a big body check. Cover, ONE, another cover, TWO. Sami brings Shane over for elbow drops, covers, TWO. Sami drags Shane up and over, then tags in Kevin. Kevin kicks Shane while Sami holds him, and the attacks to the stomach aggravate the injuries from before. Kevin mocks Bryan’s “return” while clubbing Shane. Cover, TWO. Shane grabs ropes but that doesn’t stop Kevin from throwing crossface punches. Kevin says Shane doesn’t know when to stop, and “money ain’t gonna save you now!” Kevin embraces the heat, then tags in Sami.

Sami mocks Shane’s boxing style while they mug him. He grinds boots into Shane’s gut, torturing that healing stomach. Sami throws Shane with an exploder, cover, TWO. Fans keeping cheering for Bryan but Sami keeps bullying Shane. Shane finds the energy to fight back! He gets Kevin and Sami in turn, mule kicks Sami then clubs Kevin, but Sami pounces on Shane. Sami backs up, for Kevin to SUPERKICK Shane, and then Sami hits the Blue Thunder Bomb! Cover, TWO, and Shane frustrates Sami & Kevin. Shane has no partner to tag, though, so Sami & Kevin take it easy. Sami wants Shane to get up, runs in, but Shane dodges the kick to elbow away on Sami’s back.

Shane hoists Sami up for kidney punches, then a Tree of Woe stomp. Kevin runs in but Shane side steps and sends him out. Shane sees Sami hanging upside down, and sees his opening. He climbs up to the top rope, and Sami scrambles to get free, but Shane still leaps for the COAST2COAST! Shane’s stomach keeps him from making the cover, but the fans applaud his effort. Shane crawls but Kevin uses a back senton to break the cover! Kevin drags Sami to their corner, and tags in to then hurry up and FROG SPLASH on Shane! Cover, but Bryan returns to break it?! Fans are ecstatic with “YES! YES!” Bryan gets himself to his corner, but Kevin just runs at Shane.

Shane avoids the cannonball, and Bryan reaches for a tag! Kevin and Shane crawl, hot tag to Sami to stop Shane just short. Sami drags Shane back in a chinlock, but Bryan rallies the fans for Shane. Shane uses whatever he has left to lift Sami with him, and reaches for Bryan! They’re inches away but Sami pulls Shane away. Shane back suplexes Sami! Sami and Shane are down, but Shane is heading for Bryan. Shane gets to the ropes and uses them to pull him along, tag to Bryan! Bryan slowly enters the ring while the fans are thunderous, and he throws hands on Sami and Kevin! Bryan whips but Sami reverses, Bryan goes up and over to keep moving, running lariat runs Sami over!

The fans are at a fever pitch as Bryan baseball slides Kevin down, and adds a flying knee. Bryan climbs up, to hit Sami with a missile dropkick. The landing stuns Bryan, but he kip-ups! Kevin goes after Bryan but Bryan gets him with a saido suplex. Bryan sees Kevin and Sami in opposite corners, and he begins the dropkick train! First Sami, then Kevin, then back to Sami, and back to Kevin. Kevin slumps out of the ring while Sami pleads with Bryan. No dice, shotgun kick in the corner! Bryan climbs up with Sami, SUPER STEINER! The fans and Bryan fire up together, and Bryan takes aim, only for Kevin to anchor his foot. HELLUVA KICK! Cover, TWO!

Kevin gets back to his corner and Sami tags him in. SUPERKICK blasts Shane off the apron, then Kevin shouts at Bryan, “You should’ve stayed retired!” He throws Bryan to ropes, but Bryan holds on and boots Kevin away. Kevin runs into another boot, then Bryan speeds up, but runs into the Pop-Up Bomb! TWO!! And Kevin can’t believe it! But Sami’s back, so Kevin tags him in. Kevin runs at Shane again but Shane dumps him out, to then wipe Kevin out with a leaping lariat! Sami has Bryan to himself, fans building to a rally. Sami gives Bryan haymakers for forcing them into this situation. “How could you do this?!” But each punch just makes Bryan stronger!

Bryan slaps and punches Sami back and from both sides! Then he starts giving those YES Kicks! “YES! YES!” echoes out with each kick, then Bryan prepares and hits the buzzsaw. But that isn’t all, as Bryan takes aim from the corner. Fans again echo “YES! YES!” Bryan runs out, and hits the KNEE PLUS!! Then the YES LOCK!! Sami endures the hold, and taps! Bryan & Shane win!

Winners: Bryan & Shane, Bryan by submission

Bryan’s return to the ring is victorious! And best of all, he ends this grudge between SmackDown and the #YEPMovement. Will this usher in a new era for SmackDown now that the administration is on the same page? And what will happen now that Sami & Kevin are truly without jobs in the WWE?

 

Raw Women’s Championship: Alexa Bliss VS Nia Jax!

The Irresistible Force thought the Goddess was on her side, was her best friend. But in reality, she was only ever being used by the WWE’s resident mean girl. The title is on the line in this grudge match, can Nia get revenge on Alexa for herself and everyone who has ever been bullied? Though, surprise surprise, Alexa brings Mickie James with her as back-up.

The belt is raised, but Nia doesn’t wait for the bell before running Mickie James over! She goes after Mickie, pushing her into the announce desk then the apron, then across the floor! Nia swings Mickie back and forth into the barrier, and Alexa panics. Alexa goes after Nia from behind, but that doesn’t do anything, so Alexa runs away. Nia finishes Mickie with a Samoan Drop to the floor! No more back-up for Alexa, she is truly alone against Nia. Now the bell rings, and the match begins. Alexa evades Nia, but Nia grabs her hair. Alexa SLAPS Nia, Nia shrieks which makes Alexa scream before Nia knocks her down. Nia kicks Alexa into a corner then throws her out of it! And again!

Alexa is a ragdoll as Nia throws her around the ring, then squashes her in a corner. Nia holds Alexa by her hair, fireman’s carry, and trophy press! Nia throws Alexa hard, but Alexa bails out of the ring to save herself. Alexa cowers to the announce desk, and decides to take her title and run. But Nia won’t let her get away, and runs her over the second she turns around! Nia drags Alexa back up and puts her in the ring. She stalks Alexa but Alexa shields herself with the ropes. That doesn’t stop Nia, but then Alexa rakes Nia’s eye! Alexa goes after Nia with kicks to the leg and forearms to the face. Nia shoves Alexa away but Alexa comes back for more stomps.

Nia puts Alexa in the corner, but Alexa dodges her kick, and then drops knees on the leg! Alexa stalks Nia while she writhes on the mat, and drops knees on Nia’s head. Alexa dropkicks Nia, then springboards for double stomps. She stands on Nia for the skateboard stomps, then works over the leg. Alexa keeps going, dropping elbows on the knee and wrenching the joint. Nia clubs Alexa, but Alexa dropkicks her back. Alexa hops on for a guillotine hold, but Nia powers out for a suplex! Alexa crawls to a corner while Nia stands up. Nia runs in but misses, hitting the post! Nia falls to the floor, and Alexa sees an opening. Alexa climbs up top, for a SUPER Twisted Bliss!

Down go Nia and Alexa! The referee counts them both now. Alexa gets in at 4, but Nia gets in at 8. Alexa dropkicks Nia’s face into buckles! But that won’t be enough, so Alexa says, “I’m so sorry.” Not! DDT! TWO! And Alexa doesn’t understand, so she throws a tantrum. She argues with the referee, then glares at Nia. Alexa slaps the “loser”, and says “You’re nothing without me!” But then Nia grabs Alexa, and tells her to “Shut the hell up!” Scoop slam, and Nia rallies as she throws Alexa around. Big corner splash then another toss, and another corner splash. Nia whips and clubs Alexa down, and Alexa crawls to a corner.

Nia runs in but Alexa kicks out the leg before rocking Nia with a right hand. Alexa climbs up to the top again, and jumps, but her seated senton is countered into a powerbomb lift. Alexa tries the sunset flip powerbomb, but that won’t work, either! Nia walks to a corner and flips Alexa all the way around to smack her against buckles! Alexa goes limp, but Nia drags her out from under the ropes. The referee fixes the skirt but Alexa rakes the eyes again! Nia still lifts Alexa, but Alexa rakes eyes a third time. Alexa wants her DDT, but Nia picks her up. Nia bumps Alexa off buckles, then gives her the ALABAMA SLAM!

Nia drags Alexa up, fireman’s carry, and then she climbs up the corner, SUPER SAMOAN DROP!! Cover, Nia wins!

Winner: Nia Jax, by pinfall; NEW Raw Women’s Champion

All the torment, all the manipulation, all the ridicule, it was all worth it because now, the Irresistible Force is champion! For anyone and everyone who has ever been mistreated, Nia’s win is for you!

 

WWE Championship: AJ Styles VS Shinsuke Nakamura!

The King of Strong Style won the 2018 Royal Rumble, and chose to challenge the Phenomenal One! This is a Dream (Re)Match and it’s happening where moments are made! Will Nakamura give Styles a #Knee2Face to take the world title from him? Or will Styles prove why he IS the Phenomenal One?

The fans are already dueling and thunderous at the bell. Styles and Nakamura circle, wary of each other. Nakamura gets the arm but Styles gets away. They circle again, tie up, and push each other to the ropes. The ref tries to separate them but they keep moving around into a corner. Nakamura shoves Styles, then they circle again. Nakamura tests kicks but Styles avoids them. Styles catches a kick and then gets the waistlock to slam Nakamura down. They sit up, Nakamura breaks free and kicks Styles away! Nakamura is up and on Styles right away, but the ref calls for a ropebreak. Nakamura does his signature ab rest, but Styles slaps him!

Now it’s a brawl, and Nakamura throws forearms! Nakamura whips, Styles ducks under but gets the enziguri, cover, TWO! Nakamura drops knees, then grinds it into Styles’ head. He backs off at the ref’s count, but puts Styles in a corner for knees to the stomach. Nakamura gives Styles Good Vibrations but Styles grabs that foot. Styles shoves Nakamura but Nakamura gets around behind Styles for a waistlock. Styles bucks Nakamura off, and then Nakamura runs into Styles’ knee! Nakamura checks his jaw, Styles asks him how he likes a #Knee2Face. Styles puts Nakamura in a corner, then throws a forearm. He brings Nakamura out, snap suplex and cover, ONE.

Styles keeps cool as he drags Nakamura up. He goes for another suplex but Nakamura blocks. Nakamura backs Styles to a corner with body shots, then throws forearms of his own. Styles staggers, Nakamura runs, but into the pendulum backbreaker! Styles kicks Nakamura while he’s down, stiff across the back. He brings Nakamura up, snapmare to more kicks, then a running knee drop. Cover, TWO. Styles goes after Nakamura in a chinlock, fans build to a rally while Nakamura endures. Nakamura works to stand up but Styles brings him back down. Nakamura gets back up to his feet, and fights out with elbows.

Nakamura knees Styles, then runs, but Styles speeds things up to dropkick Nakamura down! Nakamura rolls out of the ring, but Styles takes aim, slingshot but Nakamura moves. Styles goes for his sliding knee but Nakamura avoids that, too, to then sweep Styles’ legs out! Styles hits the apron, but he gets back inside the ring while Nakamura takes time to recover on the outside. Nakamura returns, Styles blocks the left kick but not the right! Styles holds onto the left leg, though, so Nakamura kicks him again. Nakamura gets space while Styles is dazed. Styles runs over but into a boot. Nakamura hops up, flying dynamic dropkick is a direct hit!

Both men are down but stirring. Nakamura gets up first, and dares Styles to “C’MON!!” Styles runs in but into the strike fest from Nakamura! Nakamura drags Styles up, whips him to a corner, and hits a knee to the stomach. Nakamura sets Styles on the top rope, then runs in for the top shelf knee! Cover, TWO, but Nakamura keeps his cool. Nakamura drags Styles up, prepares the suplex, and drops Styles with a gourd buster. He keeps on Styles with a facelock, and brings him back up, but Styles gets to the ropes. Nakamura pries him off, but Styles hits Nakamura with a wheelbarrow facebuster!

Styles can’t make a cover from exhaustion, but fans build to a rally for both men. Nakamura and Styles get space, Styles runs in for a corner clothesline! Snapmare and sliding forearm! Cover, TWO! Styles seems to be running out of ideas on how to defeat Nakamura. He gets up and drags Nakamura into the fireman’s carry. Nakamura slips out but Styles ducks the attack to get Nakamura in a pumphandle. Styles lifts, pumphandle gutbuster! Cover, TWO! Styles drags Nakamura up again, and wants the Clash. Nakamura resists, getting to ropes, and puts Styles on the apron. Styles duck the kick, hits Nakamura, then springboards!

But Nakamura catches him into a Landslide driver! Cover, TWO! Now Nakamura feels the frustration, not sure what it’ll take to defeat Styles. He stalks Styles to a corner, brings him up and lifts him to the top rope. The fans continue to duel as Nakamura roundhouses Styles. Nakamura climbs up to fireman’s carry but Styles resists. Nakamura keeps trying something, but Styles slips out! Styles wants the powerbomb but Nakamura fights him off. Nakamura kicks but Styles blocks to kick out the left leg! They both go down, but fans are rallying. Nakamura gets up, Styles comes over, and Styles goes for that bad knee.

Nakamura fights, tries to suplex but that leg gives out, Styles rolls him for a Calf Crusher! Styles wrenches and Nakamura endures! Nakamura pulls at his own hair but Styles pulls on the leg harder. He rolls Nakamura way from ropes and puts the hold back on! Nakamura continues to endure, and rolls Styles into the triangle hold! Nakamura throws punches on Styles’ head. The fans duel while Styles fades, but Styles tries a second wind, only for Nakamura to grab his leg and bring him back down! Styles keeps trying, and with a third wind, he deadlifts Nakamura up and into a BRAINBUSTER!

Both men are down again from exhaustion and the damage done. Styles crawls over to Nakamura while fans rally again. He doesn’t cover, he brings Nakamura up for the Clash, but his back gives out. Nakamura revives, swings a kick but hits the left! That’s the bad leg, though, and the pain slows him down. Nakamura doesn’t care, he goes over to Styles and hoists him back up onto the top rope. Nakamura backs off and runs in, but Styles avoids the top shelf knee. Styles springboards, and hits the Phenomenal Forearm!! Cover, TWO?! Nakamura survives Styles’ best strike?! Styles really is running out of ideas.

Styles gets himself to the apron again, and springboards, 450, but into knees! Cover, TWO! Both men are down again, but the fans are still cheering. Styles and Nakamura stir, face each other, and start throwing headbutts! Then they throw forearms and elbows, with fans dueling with every hit. Nakamura gets the edge but then Styles comes back again. Styles rocks Nakamura but then Nakamura fires off more strikes. Nakamura’s strike fest is interrupted by the Phenomenal Blitz, but Nakamura’s last hit interrupts that! PELE from Styles! Nakamura wobbles, but then rams a knee into Styles’ back! Cover, TWO!

The Rockstar grows frustrated, so he takes it out on Styles with knees to his head and shoulders. Nakamura toys with Styles, slapping him before suddenly yanking him up for the inverted exploder! Then Nakamura gets to a corner, and fires up. He takes aim at the dazed Styles, KIN- NO, STYLES CLASH!! Roll to the cover, Styles wins!

Winner: Styles, by pinfall; still WWE Champion

The match: a dream come true. The hype: completely accurate. The champion: truly Phenomenal! Styles gets the better of Nakamura, will we get a Dream (Re)Rematch?

Styles goes over to Nakamura, the respect strong between these two. Fans applaud as Styles helps Nakamura up and they hug it out. Nakamura then hands Styles the belt, on bended knee. Styles accepts, and raises the belt up high, only for Nakamura to uppercut his balls!! Why, Shinsuke, why!? Nakamura trash talks Styles in Japanese, then kicks Styles while he’s down, and stomps away on the apron. Fans boo and jeer as Nakamura kicks Styles to the floor. Nakamura keeps kicking Styles while he’s down, but the referee gets him to back off. Except Nakamura doesn’t leave, he hits Styles with the KINSHASA!!

Styles goes down, and Nakamura finally leaves. No more respect between these two, it seems. Will Nakamura be a different kind of Rockstar the next time he challenges the champion?

 

Raw Tag Team Championship: The Bar VS Braun Strowman & ???

The Swiss Cyborg & Celtic Gladiator once said they’d beaten all the teams there were to beat on Raw, but they never expected The Monster Among Men to win a Tag Team Battle Royal all alone. Strowman promises he has a partner, but who is it?!

But before introducing the mystery partner, Strowman shoves The Bar’s party float off the stage! When no partner comes out, The Bar protests, wanting to see who Strowman has. The formal introductions are made, and Strowman takes care of introducing his partner personally.

“I know everyone of you wants to know who my partner is, especially you two,” Sheamus & Cesaro. That’s why Strowman waited until they were on the Grandest Stage of Them All. It’s not one of the superstars in the back, it’s one of the fans! “Who wants to be my WrestleMania tag partner!?” The Bar again protests, that’s not a valid choice! Is it? Strowman peers out into the crowd, then exits the ring to look up close and personal. There are a lot of volunteers, but Strowman doesn’t seem to like any of his choices. He points here and he points there, but he still doesn’t have a partner.

Strowman looks high and low, but no matter how many people volunteer, he isn’t choosing them. Until he picks out a child?! Strowman escorts his new little buddy to the ring, and The Bar is really upset over this. The fans cheer as Strowman helps him up and into the ring, and we are formally introduced to… “Nicholas!” Strowman tells Nicholas just to stand on the apron and let Strowman take care of things. The Bar is about to #GetTheseHands!

Nicholas takes his position, the bell rings, and Strowman throws Sheamus to a corner, then out of it! Sheamus bounces, Strowman whips him, but Cesaro tags in while fans chant, “We Want Nicholas!” Strowman clotheslines Sheamus out but Cesaro is on him with EuroUppers. Cesaro doesn’t want Nicholas, but he might change his mind after Strowman runs him over and deadlift CHOKE SLAMS him! Cover, Sheamus breaks it. But then immediately regrets it. Sheamus runs out of the ring, Strowman pursues and grabs the ‘hawk! But Cesaro dropkicks Strowman’s legs out and gives more EuroUppers and ax handles. Tag to Sheamus, The Bar double suplex Strowman up and over!

Sheamus gets to a corner and climbs up, then jumps for a big knee drop! Tag to Cesaro, Cesaro climbs up and trash talks Nicholas, before Sheamus helps him for a senton bomb! Cover, TWO! The Bar grows frustrated, Cesaro tags in Sheamus, and they both stomp Strowman. The fans cheer for Nicholas all the same, but The Bar don’t care. They tag, and then go Super Saiyan Kick! But Strowman blocks both kicks! He runs, and double crossbodies The Bar?! Strowman flattens Sheamus & Cesaro, then gets back up. Sheamus runs in but Strowman bounces him off the post! Sheamus falls to the floor in a heap, and Strowman reaches for Nicholas?

Nicholas reaches back, and tags in! Nicholas enters the ring with Cesaro, but he isn’t sure what to do. He tags back out, and Strowman catches Cesaro’s springboard, for the MONSTER SLAM! Cover, Strowman & Nicholas win!

Winners: Strowman & Nicholas, Strowman pinning; NEW Raw Tag Team Champions

Nicholas makes a WrestleMania debut and becomes the youngest WWE tag team champion ever! With Strowman by his side, will he reign over the Raw Tag Team Division all the way to adulthood?

 

WWE Universal Championship: Brock Lesnar w/ Paul Heyman VS Roman Reigns!

A rematch three years in the making, and this time it is much, much more personal. Will the Big Dog get revenge for the beatings and the disrespect The “reigning, defending, undisputed” Beast has given him? Or will Suplex City continue to dominate The Yard?

The bell rings and they go right at each other! Lesnar puts Roman in a corner and rams his shoulder in again and again and again. Roman shoves Lesnar away and throws uppercut after uppercut, but gets thrown with a German Suplex! Lesnar throws Roman with another, and another! Roman is back up, SUPERMAN PUNCH! Reload, SUPERMAN PUNCH! Lesnar gets out of the ring, Roman slips out and comes around the bend for a flying SUPERMAN PUNCH! Roman puts Lesnar in the ring, and hurries to go after him with a clothesline that sends Lesnar out of the ring! Lesnar crawls around, but Roman slips out of the ring again.

Roman comes around the corner again, flies in, but into a belly2belly suplex! Lesnar goes into the ring but then slips right out to attack Roman, another belly2belly and Roman lands on his head! Roman slowly gets up, and Lesnar clears off an announce desk. Lesnar brings Roman over, and belly2belly suplexes Roman’s face into the table! Lesnar drags Roman into the ring, stalks him for another waistlock, and another German Suplex! The Beast walks around and reminds Roman it’s “Suplex City, bitch!” A fifth German Suplex! Lesnar stands over Roman and drags him up. He throws Roman with another belly2belly, and takes his time walking over to Roman.

Roman slowly stands, but Lesnar throws him with another belly2belly! Roman bounces and slumps out of the ring. Lesnar slips out of the ring and throws the announce lid at the German team. The Beast shows no respect to anyone, and that includes staff. He drags Roman up and over, and slings him into the timekeeper barriers. The referee tries to get this match back in the ring, but Lesnar doesn’t care. He drags Roman up again, fireman’s carry, but Roman slips out to shove Lesnar into a post! Roman recovers while Lesnar crawls. Roman runs at Lesnar, and Spears him onto the English announce table!

They both tumble all over the table, spilling into the gap. Roman stands up and drags Lesnar into the ring. Roman takes aim at Lesnar, locks and loads, then runs, SUPERMAN PUNCH! Lesnar gets back up, SPEAR! But that’s not all, another Spear! Cover, TWO! And Roman can’t believe it. The fans duel, but Roman gets back to a corner. He lets out his howl while Heyman shouts for Lesnar, Lesnar knees the Spear down! Cover, TWO! Lesnar is surprised, but he drags Roman up again. Fireman’s carry, F5! Cover, TWO!! Lesnar is further surprised, but he won’t let up. He drags Roman back up, another fireman’s carry, and another F5! Cover, TWO!?

Lesnar is furious, how is Roman surviving? Heyman shouts to “Put Him Down!” Lesnar roars, drags Roman up, a THIRD F5!! Cover, TWO!? And Lesnar curses Roman’s resilience. Lesnar searches for ideas, so he tosses Roman out of the ring. He goes back to the announce desk, and drags Roman up for another fireman’s carry. A fourth F5 sends Roman through the table! Lesnar leaves Roman in the wreckage while he rests, then drags Roman back into the ring. But Lesnar doesn’t cover, he stands over Roman and gets another waistlock. Lesnar gives Roman his sixth German Suplex. Lesnar waits for Roman to get up again, then brings him up for another fireman’s carry.

A FIFTH F5! Cover, TWO, and Lesnar is furious! He takes off the gloves now, and throws brutal elbows. Flashbacks to Lesnar busting open Orton, as Roman also bleeds profusely. Lesnar embraces the heat while he dares Roman to stand up. He drags Roman to his feet, another fireman’s carry, and– Roman shoves off and SPEARS! SPEAR AGAIN! Cover, TWO!! Roman’s shock is clear through his red mask of blood, but his blood only boils now. He runs again, getting an extra lap, but into his SIXTH F5!! Lesnar wins!!

Winner: Lesnar, by pinfall; still WWE Universal Champion

The Beast bests The Big Dog in a bloody battle! Both men pushed each other past their limits, but it was Lesnar who again conquers. What will it take to stop Lesnar’s reign of disrespect and ruthless aggression?

Roman is attended to by medics, but he tries to resist their help. Will Roman ever get the better of The Beast? Or is there just too much of a gap between them?


My Thoughts:

Wow. And I mean that in a mostly positive way. Just about everything in this was great, even the kickoff matches. Crazy to see Wyatt helping WOKEN Hardy, but perhaps there is going to be something to them being on the same side. Great for Naomi to be the Women’s Battle Royal winner, while also plugging the story of Bayley & Sasha. The Cruiserweights were amazing again, and great to see Alexander get the nod to finally get that title.

The Intercontinental Championship match was great, hooray for Seth Rollins becoming a Grand Slam. I didn’t expect Charlotte to break The Streak but if it was gonna happen, this was the show to do it on. The US Fatal 4 Way was great, and I’m only slightly upset Mahal won instead of Rusev, but maybe Mahal VS Rusev can lead us into Backlash. Angle-Rousey VS The Authority was really good, and hooray for Rousey, she looked great. The SmackDown Triple Threat was great, hooray for Harper & Rowan.

Holy crap I didn’t think they’d do it but they did, Undertaker came back and just about squashed John Cena. That in itself is crazy, that Taker got to do that to Cena. Bryan & Shane VS Kevin & Sami had such great story, Shane really sold his stomach, and ofc Bryan wins. Kevin & Sami might go to Raw with this, just because what’s the story otherwise? Hooray for Nia and hooray for Nicholas, the random kid Strowman just made into a star. I’m sure Raw will address how to handle this, my guess is stripping Strowman & Nicholas of the titles and we start over. Perhaps this is where the WOKEN & Wyatt alliance finds their way in. Styles VS Nakamura was also great, and I did not see a Nakamura Heel turn coming.

The one and only real disappointment was Roman VS Lesnar, but a lot of people expected that. Overall, and in a vacuum where no one cares that it’s Roman or Lesnar, it was a pretty good match, and it’s rare to see blood as part of the story. But in reality, I’m not sure if the result was what anyone wanted. There are still fans who hate Roman, but a lot of fans oddly agreed with his message of being anti-part-timer. Lesnar winning was a surprise, but probably not a good one. This really brings into question Lesnar’s deals with WWE and UFC, but Raw will surely solve this, too.

My Score: 9/10


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Mitchell’s ROH Death Before Dishonor Results & Report! (7/26/24)

YEEHAW!

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The word of the day is, “Gold!”

ROH brings Death Before Dishonor to Texas, and makes it bigger than ever! SIX championship matches, how drastically will the landscape change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – MXM Collection VS Spanish Announce Project; wins.
  • Komander VS The Beast Mortos; wins.
  • Texas Deathmatch: Leyla Hirsch VS Diamante; wins.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championship Qualifier: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS The Dark Order; wins and advances to Battle of the Belts 11.
  • ROH World Tag Team Championships: The Kingdom VS Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O’Reilly; win(s) and
  • ROH World Television Championship Survival of the Fittest: Atlantis Jr. VS Lio Rush VS Shane Taylor VS Johnny TV VS Lee Johnson VS Brian Cage; wins and
  • ROH Pure Championship: Wheeler Yuta VS Lee Moriarty; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship: Billie Starkz VS Red Velvet; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Championship: Athena VS Queen Aminata; wins and
  • ROH World Championship: Mark Briscoe VS Roderick Strong; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 7.25.2024

Slammiversary Fallout! Where do things go on the way to Victory Road?

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Well now we start the fall out of Slammiversary. Josh Alexander in his bad bitch summer, X-Speedball legacy, ABC got the t-a-g and Jordynne is still in charge of the Knockouts division. Like I said at the end of Slammiversary, all of the champions being Babyfaces is stupid. They need to drop a couple titles fairly quickly, because I don’t care what some people say, Nic Nemeth ain’t gonna bring any eyes to the brand. He’s about as hot as day old Hamburger Helper over a camping sterno.

We’ll probably open with the luke warm champion, so tune in like 10 minutes late for anything of substance to be happen.

https://x.com/i/status/1816629254349533588

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner: Maclin wins via KIA – *
  • AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan: AJ wins via Down Payment – **
  • Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young): Hammer Your ASH wins via Torture Rack – ** 1/2
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey): Broken Alphabet wins via Twist & Splash – ***

 

Results:

Nemeth gives the ole “I’ll be a fighting champion…blah blah” promo and drops the “any company” line that we’ve already understood what that means. Campaign Singh cuts him off…and I never thought I’d be happy for Campaign Singh to walk out and say anything…ever. And…Mustafa’s promo is worse than Dolph’s. He’s gone from parody to caricature even saying “it was the biggest screw job Montreal ever saw”. Like some of these lines are cheap heat, but most are just brain dead comments that wouldn’t get a reaction out of anyone (and the crowd was silent for that comment). Mustafa gets caught in an Archer “phrasing” moment about getting screwed hard, but this is painful. Promos written by 14 year olds everyone…

This ends with Ali challenging Nemeth for the World Title. While I’m not against walk up challenges, I watch Japanese wrestling, I don’t really get the point aside from doing it just to do it. 

ABC and Matt Hardy have a small promo, and I’m still not really a fan of Unbroken Matt Version 6.0. The floating between Broken voice and his normal voice sounds amateurish.

OH LOOK, finally a match 20 minutes into the show. And it’s my son Steve Maclin! OH CHRIST he’s facing Deaner. This has been 25 minutes of talking followed by the worst god damn attempt at a gimmick. Deaner’s little “Papa Santino told me I can wipe my ass only if the crowd agrees”. This gimmick should die in a fire.

Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner

Deaner started off quick because Maclin was in disbelief that Deaner was actually gonna fight him. Maclin dodges a Crossbody, Busaiku Knee, and just starts beating on Deaner for fun. And this is fun, maybe Maclin can make sure Deaner gets stretchered out and written off forever. How do you call for an ambulance in French? Maclin with the old Back Breaker into a stretch. Deaner tries to nerd rage up, breaks the Back Breaker Stretch, his punch combo, into a Manhattan Drop and Bulldog. Deaner hits the Crossbody, but Maclin kicks out. This is entirely too competitive.

Deaner goes for the Deaner DDT, blocked, Olympic Slam into Splashing Deaner into the corner, Caught in the Crosshairs, K-I-A, thanks for coming you damn dweeb. Stay in Canada and don’t travel Deaner, please.

https://x.com/i/status/1816633784537874761

AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan

As the bell sounds, Sami knocks Rich off the apron, Low Bridges AJ, does the Beats of the Bodhran on AJ and then AJ eats the offense and strategizes with his crew. Bishop and Rich swarm the ring, Sami allows himself to get distracted so AJ slides in and starts beating on Sami. AJ throats Sami across the middle rope and Rich makes his presence felt, AJ distracts the referee and Rich gets in a lot of cheap shots. Bishop throws Sami back in the ring, and AJ keeps up the pressure. Lots of 5 count chokes and leverage moves. After the commercial break ends, Sami dodges a Tennessee Whiskey Knee, gets in a few shots before Rich trips Sami as he’s setting up a Dive, and then AJ takes advantage of the position and hits the goofball knee strike.

AJ calls for his Chokeslam, Sami tries to break it with Axe Handles, then claws the eyes. Sami goes for a Scoop Slam, gets him part way up and then falls over. AJ Chokeslam again, but he bites his hand and starts fighting back. Launches himself at AJ, sends him bouncing off the ropes and uses the momentum to hit that Scoop Slam that was teased earlier. Sami goes for a Western Lariat but eats a Big Boot. AJ does a little Hulk Hogan pose to signal a Leg Drop, but Sami dodges and then connects on a Sliding Lariat. Thumbs Up, Thumbs….interference. Rich distracts the ref, Bishop lays out Sami, AJ connects with the Down Payment.

Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young)

ASH and Jordynne exchange slaps and then Jordynne starts to out muscle ASH. Spinebuster from Jordynne, Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights off, rope run, Sattelite DDT into both tagging out. EY does the Flair corner flop, slides back in between Hammer’s legs, and connects on a Neckbreaker. EY is the quicker of the two, but Hammer finally gets his hands on him and a Release Belly to Belly into a full mount raining of fists, then a near fall. Hammer smashes EY in a corner, Arm Wringer into an Irish Whip across, but EY moves and Hammer tags out to ASH. ASH levels Jordynne, peppers EY with a few shots and pulls him back to their corner and starts some tandem offense with Hammerman. Hammer Guerilla Presses ASH and throws her into EY for a near fall. Hammer looks to aim for either a Powerbomb or Nightmare Pendulum, but EY drops it into a Small Package, pinfall kick out, they both run, Double Lariat spot. The Knockouts get tagged in.

Jordynne is in control early, World’s Strongest Slam into a Vader Bomb. Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights it off and tags out to Hammer. Jordynne and EY do some schoolyard stuff with the old Push while Jordynne is down to trip Hammer. All four get in, ASH gets leveled, EY gets leveled, Hammer and Jordynne have a brief face off, but Hammer throws Jordynne to the apron and ASH connects with a Meteora from the apron. Death Valley Driver from Young on Hammer, ASH stares in shock, EY tells her to get, ASH runs away. EY goes up for his Macho Elbow, and ASH causes him to fall to Hammer’s feet, Torture Rack, and EY submits.

Josh Alexander comes out, with new heel music. And it’s not that bad, definitely better than some other people’s new music. Josh yells at the crowd a bit, says he can’t wait til he’s back in a real Canadian town, like his home of Toronto. Then he drops the mic in lieu of an explanation. The crowd chants him off with the “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey”. 

https://x.com/i/status/1816647373654724937

The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey)

JDC and Hardy start, but JDC quickly tags out to Myers and that doesn’t go well. Hardy grabs a hold of Myers, a few Delete chops, drags him to his corner and they all get in a few shots punctuated with Hardy getting tagged back in and an Elbow into Myers’ extended and worked on left arm. Myers stays isolated, back into the corner, Boot to the gut, Ace tags in and wallops Myers. Ace connects on Double Kicks, into Russian Leg Sweep and his half of Click Click Boom, for a 2 count. Myers finally gets free with a Jaw Breaker and tags out to Eddie. But The System gets no momentum, Ace stifles Eddie’s offense and starts a few quick tags with him and Bey for tandem offense. Moose finally comes down the ramp as Eddie kicked out of yet another pinfall attempt because The System has had nothing going for them. Eddie finally gets some offense since Moose was a big enough distraction.

Eddie thinks they have a spot, so he tags back in JDC, but The ABC stop him cold, tag in Matt Hardy, and Matt walks down JDC, but JDC Low Bridges. Matt is on the outside, so all of The System surrounds Hardy, then Joe Hendry’s music hits! That stops the heel beatdown, and we follow Hendry’s entire entrance. So that proves Hendry is bigger than the 8 other people in this frame. Not really sure if that’s optics you want to push along. Ace and JDC try to remind people there’s wrestling going on, but JDC thumbs the eye to get a little something going. Vertical Suplex for a near fall, tag out for Eddie and Eddie lights up Ace with some of those NOAH Chops. Ace retreats to the ropes and Alisha chokes him with the ropes while the ref is distracted.

Myers gets tagged in, Ace tries to use the crowd energy, Myers stops it at first but then Ace slips a Scoop Slam and tags out to Bey. Hot tag, strike rush, Double Stomp, educated feet, Leap Frog to the corner but Lish climbs on the apron and yells at Bey which stops his rhythm. Myers kicks his feet out and causes Bey to crash. Eddie tags in for a few shots, then to JDC and Slingshot Knees, Wringer Snapmare, Bow and Arrow Submission, and JDC is just doing solid wrestling work right now. Uppercut between the Shoulder Blades as Bey tries to get out, tag to Myers and Bey is still eating offense. Eddie tags in, Bey tries the Sunset Flip, but Eddie tags out before going over, so Myers folds up Bey for a near fall and then tags out to JDC who connects on a Standing Suplex, slams Bey’s face into the corner, Eddie tags in, and Bey finally fights up to his feet, Eddie just flatten Bey’s comeback, tries a Tiger Driver but eats an Enzuigiri for a simultaneous tag. JDC and Hardy come in, JDC tries to exit halfway in, but Hardy is wrecking shop. He disposes of Eddie, Myers slides in but eats a tandem Neckbreaker/DDT from Hardy. Face team does the Delete Corner Face Smashes. Poetry in Motion into a Side Effect into Corkscrew Swanton for only 2 since Myers breaks it up! Everyone throwing hands, referee is distracted, Moose comes in to Spear Hardy, but Hardy dodges and throws him into JDC (I get the call back), Hendry then lays out Moose with the big Lariat. Twist of Fate from Hardy, Splash from Bey, Broken Alphabet wins!

 

Overall Score: 4/10

Ugh, cliche promos, too damn much talking, a competitive squash match with an imbecile as our first “match”, into an overbooked and slow heel match, finally a decent tag match (with the right team going over), into another overbooked match with a “tease” for the mystery backup being more obvious than Jericho’s WWF debut.

Aside from the afore mentioned tag match, The Rascalz promo and The System Promo; this was hard to watch. A lot of cornball promos, Rosemary licks her conspiracy board, storylines got zero traction. Whoopity Doo, Ryan Nemeth got a match next week and we get an undead wedding.

While this was a bad episode, it was bad by at least new standards. We’re not back in the TNA Dark Days again, but this was…a useless show.


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