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Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu News Report! (6/27/21)

HPW Skull Lake is taking shape!

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HPW News 2021

Skull Lake becomes the gateway to gold!

HPW Gut Check Rock already announced Cia VS Lana in a Skull Lake Street Fight, winner challenges Zelda for the Goddess Championship, but that’s only the beginning! There is even bigger news, because HPW already knows where they’re going in August!

 

HPW Treasure Island 2 is happening, August 18th!

HyruleProWrestlingPPVLogo TreasureIsland2

For the second time ever, HPW is going to Eventide Island! And that means ALL THE TITLES will be on the line on one night! But that means the champions need challengers!

First, the Triforce Championship!

After tasting defeat at the underhanded hands of Yuga and Hilda, Ganondorf and Link are back at odds! Yuga claims a pinfall on Ganondorf, so what better way to hit two birds with one stone than to have Ganondorf and Yuga battle again, with a chance at Link on the line! Who will leave Skull Lake to head for Eventide?

Second, the Trios Championships!

The Studly Guys have called out the UnderWorld Order, and the UnderWorld Order has let HPW know to “give those marks the greenlight so we can wreck ’em.” Groose, Tingle and Skull Kid have their shot, will they hit the jackpot?

Third, the Death Mountain Championship!

For starters, Gold Lynel has told HPW that he will NOT be going to Skull Lake. He doesn’t want anything to do with fighting perilously over a lake. Therefore, his next Death Mountain Championship Open Challenge won’t be until Treasure Island! Who will step up to the One True Monster and go after his gold?

Fourth, the Termina Championship!

Igos du Ikana and Osphala are destined to battle again, and both are willing to do it at HPW’s #UltimateSummerBlockbuster. Will the Gleaming Yellow Light make all the waiting and preparing worth it and dethrone the Ruler of Ruin?

Fifth, the Eventide Challenge returns!

HPW is returning to the island, so why wouldn’t this return, too? Six competitors will battle for a huge title opportunity! What eclectic combination will collide to battle for a golden ticket?

 

And that brings us to HPW Skull Lake Slam Jam!

We already know about the Skull Lake Street Fight between Cia and Lana, but in case you missed it, here’s an explanation on how that match works. Obviously by “Street Fight,” it is a match with no disqualifications and no count-outs. Cia and Lana must either win by pinfall or submission in the ring, or by shoving the other into Skull Lake itself! How will the Dark Sorceress and the Blue Haired Goddess settle their sibling rivalry?

As we already said, Ganondorf and Yuga are battling to be the next contender to Link’s Triforce Championship, but here’s a little extra: There will be a ringside ban on EVERYONE! Not just Ravio and Hilda, but anyone who might try to help Ganondorf against The Artist! This way, it will be truly 1v1, with a clear winner going on to Eventide! Will Yuga even survive against a furious Gerudo Ace?

Then, to determine the six for the Eventide Challenge, there will be a SKULL LAKE BATTLE ROYAL! This is something Ravio and Hilda are allowed in, and they’ll be joined by the Desert Flowers, the Doom Bringers, the Three Masters, the Dark Forces, The Great Fairy, Ghirahim, Fin Balure, Oaky Treetoh and Midna! The battle royal will go until only six participants are left in the ring, and those will be your #EventideSix for Treasure Island 2! Who will survive to set sail for the summer?


My Thoughts:

A lot of news to process but I am being transparent on how I am actually planning ahead towards HPW’s next big tradition. The Triforce Tournament returned, so why not bring back our mix of Money in the Bank, Clash of Champions and SummerSlam? There is a lot building from now to even the October tradition, Clash of Champions and its huge, modified Royal Rumble, so I hope you stay tuned!

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 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

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CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

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Entertainment

Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu News Report! (5/9/25)

June will be electric!

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Prepare for the most electrifying even of the HPW calendar!

While the stage is set for Blood & Thunder 4 and the HPW World Trios Championships, HPW must also address the return of KAGE!

 

Thundra Plateau is ready.

Wrestling is Life, but life has its stormy weather. The rain is going to be hot in June, but will the reign continue through the Summer? The Dark Forces may have failed to take the Undisputed Triforce World Championship from Zelda, but they still have the World Trios Championships. Harlequin, Lupay & Glutko will step inside the double ring, double cage to defend their gold. On one side, Arrow Club’s special combination of Fin Balure, Torbevito & Bad Croc Scaly. On the other, a new combination of its own in Cia, Lana & Midna.

 

Speaking of Cia, Lana & Midna…

The three of them are together, dressed in workout attire, in what appears to be a dance studio. This is a collaboration stream for Midna and Lana as they’re both big presences on the internet, aka “influencers.” Lana and Midna wave and say hi, and they give introductions, including Cia, who is reluctant to be standing there. Cia doesn’t know why they need to do this. Lana says they have to improve their teamwork. They may have won against Los Taros Locos, but it was really sketchy there for a second. Midna adds that doing a dance routine together is great for their timing and coordination.

Cia says she didn’t mean that, she meant having to stream it! Oh, well obviously, combining Midna’s viewing audience with Lana’s, and HPW’s overall, this makes huge numbers! So? And huge money…! Cia raises her eyebrow and says, “Oh really?” The trio sets up, and Lana says obviously they first have to learn the steps. Midna brings up, “Wait, what song are we dancing to?” Oh, good point. Lana was thinking something from Lulu. Cia asks, “Lulu? From the Indigo-Go’s?” Midna says Lulu’s got a great solo album. Lana agrees! That’s so great that they like the same music. Cia isn’t as familiar with her solo stuff, so she’ll rely on them for this.

Lana suggests they go with Energetic Me. For one, it has the most energy, duh. And it still has a dance vibe, which is the whole point. Midna says she might’ve gone with Royal Discotheque or Ten Outta Ten, but she sees Lana’s point. Lana shows them the dance moves she has in mind. Left arm up, bent at the elbow, and the hand up against the side of the chest. Then they switch so the right arm goes up to mirror that position while the left hand goes back to the hip. Maybe add a little hip pop as that happens. Do that a couple times, and then turn to the right. This puts the left hand on the back of the hip, right hand on the back of the neck for a sexy pose.

Then you turn to flip it the other way, then do a 360 with a big neck whipping, hair flipping move. Then finish with feet apart and double V’s up by the eyes, maybe with a wink. Cia says, “Yeah, okay…” while Midna says, “I like it!” Midna says she’ll set up in the middle. Cia asks why Midna is in the middle, and Midna says it’s symmetry. She’s the tallest, Cia and Lana are about the same, it makes sense. Yeah, but it also means Midna is the center of attention. Well, that’s just coincidental. Lana says it doesn’t matter, the point is them doing it all in synch. Cia sighs and says, “Fine.” Midna is in the middle, Cia is on her right, and the music plays.

Left arm, right arm, left arm, right arm, pose to the right, pose to the left, 360 spin and neck whip, then double V. Midna nailed it, but Cia was lagging. Cia defends she was not, but Lana says it’s alright, they’ll just keep trying. They run through it a couple more times, they do tighten it up, and all three feel really good about how that went.

The Dark Forces are watching.

They aren’t impressed by the “little dance party.” Harlequin says the Faces of Evil are way better anyway. Especially with the classics like the Thriller dance and Macarena. Zant says, “The Macarena? Pfft, and people think I’m a dork…” Harlequin says, “Don’t you dare mock the Macarena!” Harlequin changes tabs on the computer and starts playing the song! After the introduction, he lifts his right arm up flat, then his left. Then he turns the right hand up, the left hand up, puts his right hand on his left shoulder, left hand on right shoulder, then moves right hand up behind his head, and then his left.

Now his arms crisscross, right hand on left hip and left hand on right hip, to then switch so right hand on right hip and left hand on left hip. And of course, he swivels his hips in one big circle to go with “HEY~ Macarena! AIGHT!” Zant rolls his eyes while Harlequin keeps going, jumping 90 degrees to his left. Ganon walks in, Ghirahim following behind, and he tells Harlequin to “turn that crap off.” Harlequin pouts but he does as told. Ganon seethes as he takes a seat in his big arm chair. “Needless to say… Wrestling is Life didn’t go how I’d hoped. What was Kage even doing there?! Did either of you have any idea he was going to betray us?!”

Zant and Ghirahim are a bit flustered. Zant isn’t even sure Kage was part of The Dark Forces at the time Ganon took ownership. He’d kinda gone rogue at some point, didn’t he? Ghirahim agrees, it didn’t seem like he was even aligned with Cia and the others. All the more reason for Kage to keep his nose out of Ganon’s business! If Kage cared about the Dark Forces, then he would’ve helped them fight back at HyruleMania, or any time since. Kage clearly just wants the title, same as Ganon, so he’s a dead man walking. Speaking of that… Where’s Kevin? He came back in April, why isn’t he here?

 

Somewhere dark and spooky…

Heavy footsteps can be heard echoing as Kevin Gibdo moves down the hallway. He speaks with a low, airy voice, “Majora… Your madness… spread like wildfire… You thought by setting me ablaze… I would crumble into ash… You were wrong! Instead, I have been purified…! Purged of flaws and weaknesses… I now come forth… as gold!” There’s a light at the end of the hall, and Kevin enters a grand hall, with treasure gleaming in the light. At the center is the sarcophagus. Kevin walks up to it, opens it, and then his burnt and tattered bandages fall away before he steps inside. The sarcophagus closes, then the eyes on it begin to glow… Then the entire thing glows!

The glowing becomes a shining light, and that shining becomes so bright that nothing can be seen. It is clear things between Kevin and Majora are not over. Will the Masked Monster even stand a chance once the Gibdo of All Gibdos is restored to full strength?

 

Back to the Dark Forces…

Shabonne says, “I’m sure Kevin is just fine doing whatever Gibdos do on their time off.” Tali says, “What matters is what I’m about to do to that tiny little weasel with the Goddess Championship. If The Dark Forces is gonna have all the gold, then I need to squash her like a bug and take that title off of whatever’s left!” Ganon nods and says he likes the initiative. Tali will start on her own Triple Crown as the Dark Forces will make Hyrule Pro-Wrestling their kingdom! The group cheers while raising a toast! And then Harlequin gets Glutko and Lupay to join in on the Macarena, to which Ganon groans and facepalms.

 

And so, the ThunderStruck card is set!

The double ring, double cage will rattle with Blood & Thunder as the HPW World Trios Championships are on the line! The Gerudo Ace looks to settle a grudge with the Hero’s Shadow! And now, the Million Rupee Championship and HPW Goddess Championships will also be on the line! Will the Dark Forces absolutely dominate the Summer? Be ready to endure the heat on Friday, June 20th!

About Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling) 

THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)

FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast 

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

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Bandwagon Nerds

Bandwagon Nerds #287: Filling A Void

The Nerds review Thunderbolts*, check out the latest trailers, and celebrate Star Wars Day as only they can!

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Bandwagon Nerds Mario

The Bandwagon is stripped down this week as Dave and PC Tunney helm the ship for a big week in the Nerdosphere. Naturally, we are covering Thunderbolts as Dave, Tunney (and the rest of the Bandwagon, for that matter) all saw the latest entry into the MCU. What was the consensus, and did the longest post-credit scene in MCU history push the Universe in the right direction? In other MCU News, we discovered why Hawkeye had no second season. From there, the guys head into the Trailer Park to look at the latest, including a sizzle reel for Netflix’s TUDUM event, Dwayne “The Rock ” Johnson’s latest movie, The Smashing Machine, and a very creepy look at Weapons. GTA 6 got delayed, again….but could that be a blessing in disguise? But this Episode was recorded on Star Wars Day, and to commemorate the event, Dave tries his best to convince Tunney to watch Andor, while Tunney tells Dave what he likes most about one of the most successful franchises of all time. All that, plus Dave tells you why The Last of Us is the best show anywhere on TV. Dave & Tunney cover a lot of ground in an action-packed episode of BWN, so make sure you tune in!

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PROWRESTLINGTEES.COM/TheChairshot – Makes a GREAT GIFT!!!

About Bandwagon Nerds

Join Patrick O’Dowd, David Ungar, PC Tunney, Rey Cash, and DPP as they keep everyone up on all things nerd and maybe add some new nerds along the way. It’s the Bandwagon Nerds Podcast!

About Chairshot Radio Network

Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

MONDAY – Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY – 4 Corners Podcast (sports)

WEDNESDAY – The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)

THURSDAY – POD is WAR

FRIDAY – DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY – The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY – Keeping the news ridiculous… The Oddity / The Front and Center Sports Podcast

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE’s PPV/PLE history)

http://TheChairshot.com PRESENTS…IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O’Dowd’s 5X5


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Bandwagon Nerds

About Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling) 

THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)

FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast 

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5

Classic POD is WAR


Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!

All Shows On Demand


Powered by RedCircle


Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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