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Andrew’s IMPACT Results & Match Ratings: 12.16.2021

With this Saturday being a Throwback IPWF App Special, and non-canon like a Dragonball Z Movie, this should be leading to Hard to Kill. I wonder if anyone will get rocked during the contract signing?

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With this Saturday being a Throwback IPWF App Special, and non-canon like a Dragonball Z Movie, this should be leading to Hard to Kill. I wonder if anyone will get rocked during the contract signing?

Well last week got away from me because work decided to drop a reconciliation project spanning 3 years on me, and by the time I got home on Thursday I passed out. So let’s see where the Hard to Kill build is going.

The thing I will find the most interesting is if this ends up being the last real IMPACT before 2022. In the past few years they’ve taken a liking to using the last few weeks as a Year End Wrap up. So I’m intrigued to see if we’re building to something next week or January 6th.

Ratings:

  • Rohit Raju w/Raj Singh vs Josh Alexander: Alexander wins via C4 Spike – *** ¼
  • Joe Doering & Doc Gallows w/VBD & Karl Anderson vs Willie Mack & Rich Swann w/ Rhino & Heath Slater: Towers win via Double Tandem Chokeslam – ** ¾
  • John Skyler vs Trey Miguel: Trey wins via Meteora – **
  • Chris Bey w/Hikuleo vs Laredo Kid: Bey wins via Cutter – *** ½
  • Tenille Dashwood w/Madison Rayne & Kaleb vs Jessie McKay w/Cassie Lee: Tenille wins via Spotlight Kick – ** ¼

 

Results:

Opening the show they do the memorial still for Jimmy Rave. Still one hell of a tragic story with what he went through the last few years. No matter what details come out of at a later date, he gave everything to wrestling and wrestling took more than it has from most. He will be missed.

Rohit Raju w/Raj Singh vs Josh Alexander

It takes Rohit a second to notice that Josh’s ribs are taped under the singlet after an attack from Jonah. So once Rohit sees this, he focuses his attacks on the mid-section. Alexander fights through it early, sets up for the Apron Crossbody, but Raj moves Rohit and then Alexander gets distracted with Raj. Rohit takes advantage and starts working over Alexander.

Rohit gets a little cocky and Alexander looks to pick the ankle, but Rohit blocks hits a Russian Leg Sweep and tries to keep moving forward. Alexander catches Rohit in a Fireman’s Carry, rolls through, looks for a top turnbuckle move but Raj distracts him and Rohit hits a Vertical Suplex and then hangs Alexander on the ropes mid-section first. There’s a small burst of offense from Alexander after a few solid strikes and a Release German Suplex, but Rohit keeps finding openings.

After a distraction from Raj, Rohit hits a Running Yakuza Kick, Cannonball to the seated Alexander and then a Double Footstomp right into the ribs…and kick out! Alexander keeps selling the ribs, can’t hit the C4 Spike so Rohit hits a Jumping Knee, goes for the Mumbai Driveby but eats a Rolling Forearm. Josh Alexander goes dark after that, draped Rohit’s leg in the corner, drops down on it, stays pissed and finally hits the C4 Spike after digging into something different.

Joe Doering & Doc Gallows w/VBD & Karl Anderson vs Willie Mack & Rich Swann w/ Rhino & Heath Slater

Gallows starts off with Swann, and Swann starts running the big man in circles. Quick tags and general quickness give Willie and Rich the early advantage. Gallows gets oki-doked to the outside, Doering goes over to check on Gallows and double Planchas from Willie and Rich take us to commercial. When we get back, Gallows and Rich are in the ring trading blows, where Gallows finally connects with a Round Kick and drops Rich off the apron.

After a small flurry by the big men, Willie evens the score and we see some tandem corner attacks. Eventually we get a High/Low from Willie and Rich on Doering to focus on Gallows. Doering stops Rich from a top rope move by just pushing him off. Double Tandem Chokeslam from the Towers and Willie eats the pin.

Rich and Willie put up a better fight than expected but eventually fall to the size difference. Afterwards the heels beat up all the faces and Eddie Edwards comes out to make the save. I wonder if this could possibly lead to a Lethal Lockdown match? It’s been a while since we’ve seen one of them.

John Skyler vs Trey Miguel

Really awkward early chain wrestling. Trey with his typical too many twist and World of Sport way of doing chain wrestling while Skyler tries to slow it down. Things don’t get interesting until Skyler hits a Slingshot Spear, but it’s a Trey Miguel match. It will be predictable, wasted movement, no real story beyond his wannabe Myles Morales underdog approach, he’s just trash.

Speaking of which, the trash starts to block a few charges by Skyler, an unnecessary handspring into Skyler hitting a Release Overhead Belly to Belly into the corner. Trey fights back off the top rope, attempts an Avalanche Powerbomb, but Skyler blocks, Cheeky Nandos, Corner Tiger Feint and then the Meteora.

As usual, a waste of like 5 minutes. Trey is everything that was bad with Will Ospreay and Ricochet early in their career. Except Ospreay had charisma…Trey is just more bland than describing the taste of vanilla to someone. After the match, Steve Maclin attacks him and then drags him into the back and does some kind of tie up torture porn video to try and get Trey to agree to his title match. I’m…I…why?

Chris Bey w/Hikuleo vs Laredo Kid

Hey look, Light Heavyweights that know how to tell a story while wrestling, concepts.

Early on Bey tries to play tactical heel by calling to the ref that Laredo was pulling hair, tries to find quick spots but Laredo responds and actually out-quicks Bey on the first real exchange. Laredo gets Bet on the run, Laredo goes for the Senton from the Apron, Bey moves and Laredo just rolls through. Hikuleo runs interference and Bey takes the advantage off the little bit of help from his big buddy.

Bey hits the Apron Tiger Feint, bounces Laredo off the post, Low Sweets, taunts in the ring and then goes back out to deliberately work over Laredo’s ribs and back. Laredo tries to get an advantage during some rope runs, but Bey sweeps the leg, stands on Laredo’s hands and hits a Dropkick and then taunts. So Bey and Hikuleo continue the taunting and interspersed cheating in classic Bullet Club style.

Bey drives Laredo into the corner, hits an Enzuigiri followed by a Top Rope Crossbody for a near count. Every kick Bey hits after, he mocks Laredo saying “breathe”. Bey does a good job slowing things down and just being very deliberate in his attacks and taunts. Laredo manages to block a move and hold on to land a Slingshot Senton, a few other high impact moves and starts working toward a possible finisher. As the referee checks on Chris Bey, Hikuleo shoves Laredo off the corner and we go to commercial.

Out of the commercial, Bey has the advantage but Laredo turns the tides by dodging the corner Hip Attack, hits a Michinoku Driver and then subsequent Moonsaults. Laredo goes for a Suplex, Bey Blocks, hits a Spinning Corkscrew Kick into a TKO for the near fall. Bey taunts on the top turnbuckle, Laredo counters Bey and turns it into an Avalanche Driver for 2. Some quick counters bring us to more top turnbuckle jockeying. Bey rocks Laredo and Laredo lays back on the top rope. Bey hits a Double Footstomp onto the suspended Laredo for 2. Laredo blocks the Art of Finesse into an Essex Destroyer.

Hikuleo distracts Laredo, so Laredo hits a Swanton on Hikuleo. Laredo goes back to the top rope to get intercepted by Bey. Bey backflips off the top rope, Laredo goes for a Diving Headbutt and Bey does his best Randy Orton impression and hits the Cutter for the pinfall!

Tenille Dashwood w/Madison Rayne & Kaleb vs Jessie McKay w/Cassie Lee

Tenille and Jessie start with a little playful mocking, the double foot catch, then they both put down share a good laugh and Tenille cracks Jessie in the face. This actually is a decent match admist some of the silliness. While there’s posing and some cute mocking spots, the spots are pretty rough. Jessie hits the Big Boot, looks for the pinfall but Kaleb pulls out the referee. When he does so, he blames Cassie for pulling out the referee. So there’s outside ridiculousness and Jessie goes out to get involved.

As she heads back in, Kaleb trips her, Tenille hits the Spotlight Kick and Tenille wins!

We have a nice triple threat contract signing. So if the contract signing is tonight, I’m going to go out on a limb and say we’re getting the year in review shows for the remainder of the year. Massive Cassidy makes his point, signs the contract and walks out. So he’s immediately distancing himself from a possible trope.

Moose can’t quite provoke Cardona, but after insulting Chelsea, calls her a whore and of course gets in the great Mid Card-ona line…Matt snaps. But Moose takes control and Uranage’s Matt through the table. Nothing ground breaking, but it was entertaining and Moose managed to put some damage on Cardona.

Chelsea tries to get Moose to leave and he almost does, but he just removes his blazer, heads back in and decides to line up Cardona for a Con-Chair-to. Chelsea grabs the chair and asks Moose to stop. Cardona gets to his feet, grabs the other chair and turns just in time to see Cardona and moves out of the way so Chelsea eats the Chairshot. Moose and myself are heartily amused. Chelsea took that chairshot like a champ.

Overall Score: 7/10

So what I’m figuring is the last IMPACT before 2022, ends to keep us entertained for Hard to Kill. The contract singing was good, the Knockouts Title had some good build with Deonna and Mickie, the Knockouts Tags are at least entertaining, X Division is weird though. Not just me disliking Trey with the fury of 1000 suns, the torture porn scene with Maclin was…I’ll say different. Not really sure what they’re doing with the Tag Team scene, but at least the people are involved even if the belts don’t end up on the line at Hard to Kill.

There’s plenty to sink your teeth into, a few choice lines and vignettes, and some solid wrestling. All in all, no real complaints.

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Coverage

Mitchell’s ROH Results & Report! (4/18/25)

ROH says TGIF!

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420 Honor Club!

Can’t go wrong with ROH on a Friday afternoon! But will Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs still be World Six Man Tag Champions after facing #MXMTV?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Bandido & Komander w/ Alex Abrahantes VS The Infantry w/ Shane Taylor Promotions; Bandido & Komander win.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championships: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS Johnny TV & MXM Collection; Dustin & The Von Erichs win and retain the titles.
  • Sammy Guevara VS Lee Johnson w/ Blake Christian; wins.
  • The Frat House VS ???
  • Six Man Tag: Atlantis Jr, Fuego & Esfinge VS Euforia, Barbaro Cavernario & Zandokan Jr; win.
  • Evil Uno & Alex Reynolds VS Jon Cruz & Rosario Grillo; win.

PLAY BY PLAY

Bandido & Komander w/ Alex Abrahantes VS The Infantry w/ Shane Taylor Promotions!

The Most Wanted is once again ROH World Champion, but the Commander of the Skies just lost his ROH World Television Championship. Meanwhile, Captain Shawn Dean & “Bad News & Tattoos” Carlie Bravo want to take over the ROH Tag Division. Will someone be getting Two 2 Da Head? Or will the luchadores be dealing out a Blackjack 21?

The fans rally for Bandido already, which annoys The Infantry. The Code of Honor is not upheld as The Infantry strike first! The bell rings, the ref reprimands and the fans boo as Dean fires forearms with Komander while Bravo has Bandido. Dean kicks Komander, then Bravo SUPERKICKS Komander! Bandido BOOTS Dean, then he brawls with Bravo! They go back and forth, Bandido ROCKS, KNEES, and headlocks. Dean tags in as Bravo powers out, and then Bravo drops down for Dean to take a swing. Bandido blocks that to DECK Dean, but Bravo CHOP BLOCKS Bandido! Bravo shoves Bandido out for Dean to whip hard into railing!

The fans boo but Bravo says, “That’s how we get down! S T P!” Dean drags Bandido up and into the ring, then stays between him and Komander. The fans rally, but Dean RAMS Bandido into the corner! The Infantry mugs Bandido, the ref counts, and The Infantry lets off. Tag to Bravo and he CHOPS Bandido! Bravo puts a leg in the ropes, stomps it, then CHOPS! Bravo stomps Bandido again, then backs off as the ref reprimands. Bravo brings Bandido out, but Bandido fights the suplex! Bravo hooks a leg to FISHERMAN SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO! Not quite perfect, but Bravo drags Bandido from Komander with a HEEL HOOK!

Tag to Dean, Dean stomps Bandido, and Bravo says #TAIGASTYLE taught him that. Lee Moriarty gives a thumbs up, and Dean stomps Bandido. Dean puts Bandido’s leg on the ropes, then HIP DROPS it! The fans rally for Bandido but Dean stomps him down. Cover, TWO! Bandido stays in this but Dean drags him around by the leg. Dean drops an elbow on the knee! Then he drops an elbow on the other knee! Then back to the right knee! Then the left knee! The fans boo but Dean drags Bandido to the corner. Dean runs to ELBOW Bandido, then he tags Bravo. Dean scoops Bandido, Bravo goes up, ELBOW DROP BACKBREAKER!

Bravo swaggers while the fans boo, but then he goes back to cover Bandido. TWO, and the fans rally up. Bravo drags Bandido up to HEADBUTT, then he tags Dean. Dean sends Bravo in, but Bandido TOSSES Bravo out! Dean runs up, Bandido BOOTS him! Dean comes back, Bandido dodges and hobbles, hot tag to Komander! Komander springboards and salutes for the CROSSBODY! Bravo rushes back in, he has Komander, but Komander BOOTS Dean to go up and over Bravo! Komander shoves Bravo into Dean, then knuckle locks Bravo to CHOP! Komander goes up, jumps around, and FLYING RANAS Bravo away!

The fans fire up as Komander dodges Dean, ROCKS Bravo, then mule kicks Dean! Komander sends Dean into Bravo, then springboards to DROPKICK Bravo into giving Dean the DDT! Cover, but Bravo breaks it! Bandido runs up, Bravo wrenches and ROLLING ELBOWS! Bravo is fired up, but Komander SUPERKICKS him! Komander fires off on Dean with forearms and puts him in the corner. Bravo sneaks a tag while Komander climbs up. Komander rains down five punches, then whips Dean corner to corner. Dean reverses, Bravo runs up, CARLIE CROSSOVER! Then feed to Dean’s FLYING LARIAT!

The Infantry then hoist Komander up, wrench and URENAGE DOUBLE BACKBREAKER!! Bravo covers, but Bandido breaks it! The fans fire up as Dean whips but Bandido TOSSES him! Bravo runs up, Bandido SUPERKICKS him! The fans fire up as Bandido rises, but then Bravo distracts the ref. Shane Taylor gets on the apron, talks trash on Bandido, then ROCKS Bandido! Komander storms up, Shane grabs him, but Bandido comes back! Komander gives Bandido the boost to SUNSET FLIP POWERBOMB Shane onto Moriarty & Dean! The fans are all fired up as Komander then BOOTS Bravo, ENZIGIRIS, and calls to Bandido!

Komander tags Bandido, then he ROCKS Bravo! Komander goes corner to corner to go up, up, and ESCALARA MOONSAULT onto STP! Bandido scoops Bravo for the X KNEE!! Bravo is on the ropes. Bandido runs, BLACKJACK 21 PLEX!! Bridging cover, Bandido y Komander win!

Winners: Bandido & Komander, by pinfall

A big victory for Bandido y Komander! With Sueprcard of Honor just a few weeks away, who will step up to take on The Most Wanted for his most wanted ROH World Championship?

 

ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championships: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS Johnny TV & MXM Collection!

The Natural may have been literally robbed of his belt, but he is still a champion alongside Marshall & Ross Von Erich. The Von Erichs are back to help Dustin take back that belt, will the Sons of Texas ride off into the sunset tonight? Or will they find they’re NOT #TVReady?

Speaking of not ready, Johnny, Mansoor & Mason Madden attack the Sons of Texas at the ramp! The fans boo the blindside attack, but Mansoor CLUBS Ross, Johnny CLUBS Marshall, and Mason stomps Dustin. Johnny kicks Marshall, Mason whips Dustin into the railing, and Mansoor RAMS Ross into the steel steps! The fans boo more, Mansoor tells them to shut up, but Marshall fights back! Marshall fires forearms, but Johnny CLAWS Marshall’s eyes! Mason sends Dustin into more railing, then LEG LARIATS Dustin down! Mansoor fires more shots on Ross, then he puts Ross in the ring for Johnny.

The ref checks on Ross, but Ross says he wants the match! The bell rings, and Johnny BOOTS, KICKS, ROCKS, and fires more shots on Ross! Taya Valkyrie shows off the remodeled ROH World Six Man belt while Johnny gives Ross some ground ‘n’ pound. The fans boo but Johnny drags Ross up. But Ross jumps to RANA! And then he arm-drags! And arm-drags again! And DROPKICKS! The fans fire up as Ross brings Johnny up, tags Marshall, and then whips so Marshall can DROPKICK! Cover, TWO! Johnny rolls to his feet, mule kicks Marshall, then hot tags Mansoor! But Marshall dodges to BLAST Mason!

Marshall ROCKS Mansoor with counter punch after punch, but Mansoor puts him in a corner for body shots and stomps! The ref counts, Mansoor digs his boot in, but then Mansoor stops at 4. Mansoor argues with the ref while sneaking kicks. Mansoor whips corner to corner, but Marshall comes back to LARIAT! Marshall fires more hands, then he UPPERCUTS! Marshall ROCKS Mansoor, wrenches and whips corner to corner, but Mansoor comes back! Marshall runs through the lariat to then LARIAT Mansoor! The fans fire up and Marshall calls his shot! CANNONBALL for Mansoor! Cover, TWO!

Marshall drags Mansoor up, headlocks, and Ross tags in. They mug Mansoor and the fans cheer that CHOP! Ross headlocks and grinds, but Mansoor hooks Ross’ nose! Mansoor headlocks now, but Ross powers up and out. Mansoor jumps the dropdown, Mason tags in, and Mason BLASTS Dustin off the apron to then LEG LARIAT SPINEBUSTER COMBO! The fans boo, Marshall protests, but MXM mugs Ross! Johnny joins in and they all stomp away! The fans rally for Dustin while Mason TOSSES Ross out. MXM distracts the ref so Taya can stomp away on Ross with those bright green boots!

The ref has to hold Marshall back, and Mason goes out to fetch Ross. Mason puts Ross in the ring, throat chops him, then fires body shots as he says he’s H O T T, O~ G~ O~! Tag to Mansoor, Johnny lets Chappell Roan know they’re big fans, and Mansoor BLASTS Marshall off the apron! Mason scoops Ross, Mansoor runs up, CATWALK SLAM! Cover, TWO! Ross survives and Mansoor snarls. Mansoor clamps on with a chinbar and armlock! Ross pries at the grip, reaches out for the ropes, and Marshall coaches him. Ross fights up, Mansoor holds him back, but then Mansoor THROWS Ross down by his hair!

The fans boo, but Mansoor drags Ross back to tag Johnny. Johnny stomps Ross, then drags him up, only for Ross to fire body shots! Johnny gets up and under Ross, Alabama ROLLING SLAM! Cover, TWO! Johnny stands over Ross and pulls on the arms while he tags in Mason. Mansoor runs around the outside to blindside Dustin! The fans boo and Marshall protests, but there’s nothing to be done as Mason drops an ELBOW on Ross! And another ELBOW! And then a JUMP ELBOW! Cover, TWO! Mason is annoyed, Dustin is down, and Mansoor tags in. Mansoor tells Marshall that he saw the Iron Claw movie, and it SUCKED!!

The fans boo but MXM hoist Ross up! Mason runs, but Marshall DUMPS him out! Ross CLUBS away on Mansoor, reaches for Marshall, but Mansoor holds onto a hand! Ross fires a forearm, the fans rally up, but Mansoor still holds on! Mansoor ducks the shot, back suplexes, but Ross lands out! DOUBLE LARIATS take both men down! The fans fire up as Ross and Mansoor crawl! But Mason is creeping up! Mason YANKS Marshall down, then THROWS him into the steel steps! And he CLUBS Dustin for good measure! Mansoor rolls up Ross, TWO! Ross feints high to BACKDROP Mansoor! Dustin rises up!

The fans are thunderous as Mansoor and Ross crawl, hot tags to Johnny and Dustin! The Natural rallies on the Guru of Greatness, then whips, but Johnny reverses! “Not Today!” UPPERCUT! SNAP POWERSLAM! Mansoor is in, but Dustin kicks and “Not Today!” UPPERCUT! SNAP POWERSLAM! Mason is in, but again, “Not Today!” But Mason grabs Dustin first! CHOKE- NO, Dustin slips free, and feeds Mason to a DOUBLE DROPKICK from the Von Erichs! Johnny CLUBS Dustin, whips, but Dustin hits a BULLDOG! Cover, Mansoor breaks it! The fans boo but Mansoor CLUBS Dustin. Mansoor whips, Dustin reverses, but Mansoor avoids the powerslam!

Mansoor DDTS Dustin, but Ross RANAS Mansoor! Johnny SUPERKICKS Ross! Marshall DISCUS LARIATS Johnny! Mason LEG LARIATS Marshall! Dustin storms up, Mason HEADBUTTS him! Mason runs, but Dustin dodges! Mason’s leg is in the ropes, and he begs Dustin not to. Dustin pokes Mason in the eyes! And then he puts Mason’s other leg in the ropes! Dustin takes a deep breath, but Johnny runs up! Dustin gets around and lifts Johnny, to stick him right in there with Mason! Taya protests, but that lets Dustin hit DOUBLE SHATTERED DREAMS!! Mansoor runs up, Dustin dodges, DESTROYER!!

Ross is in, and he gives Mansoor an IRON CLAW!! Marshall has Mason, and SLAM DUNKS him into Johnny’s TV! Johnny sits upright, right into Mansoor’s runway! Ross keeps Mansoor in a corner, and Dustin brings Johnny up! Dustin puts one out, then hits the FINAL RECKONING!! Cover, Sons of Texas win!!

Winners: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs, by pinfall (still ROH World Six Man Tag Team Champions)

Taya is beside herself! Dustin gets his belt back as the Von Erichs keep theirs! Will no one ever truly stop The Last of His Kind from running the ROH Tag Division?

 

 

 

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]

About Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling) 

THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)

FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast 

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5

Classic POD is WAR


Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!

All Shows On Demand


Powered by RedCircle


Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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Coverage

Andrew’s TNA iMAPCT! & Unbreakable Results & Match Ratings: 4.17.2025

iMPACT is the Pre-Show, Unbreakable is a TNA+ Special! See what happened!

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iMPACT! is getting the old Heat treatment as a TV episode pre-show. While nothing about the iMPACT episode seems overly intriguing, they all actually have narrative weight, and since the last two weeks have been devoid of weight and general cohesion…this might be a surprisingly good episode which would serve as a better pre-show than expected.

I’m still mad that it’s a damn Thursday and they want to have 4-5 hours of show because WrestleMania reasons. Even WWE realized doing long shows before workdays was stupid, so NJPW giving them the idea to break Mania into two nights is a boon for everyone over thirty.

Also the main reason I’m doing a joint article. Since Unbreakable starts immediately after iMPACT, I’m not gonna put up back to back articles. One stop shoppin it!

iMPACT! – Ratings:

  • Laredo vs Jason Hotch w/Tasha Steelz: Laredo wins via Laredo Fly – ** 1/4
  • Jazmyn Nyxx w/Fatal Influence vs Xia Brookside w/Lei Ying Lee: Xia wins via Small Package – **
  • KC Navarro vs Cody Deaner: KC wins via Loaded Fist – **
  • Maggie Lee & Heather by Elegance w/Personal Concierge vs Gigi Dolin & Tatum Paxley: Hot Topic Hotties win via Cemetery Drive – ** 1/4
  • Jakara Jackson w/Lash Legend vs Dani Luna w/Jody Threat: Dani wins via Luna Landing – ** 1/4
  • Leon Slater vs Brian Myers: Myers wins via Roster Cut – ** 1/2

 

Unbreakable – Quick Ratings:

  • Zachary Wentz vs Eric Young vs AJ Francis: Young wins via Piledriver – *** 1/4
  • Ace Austin vs Steve Maclin vs Eddie Edwards w/Alisha: Steve Maclin wins via KIA – *** 1/2
  • X Division Championship: Moose(c) w/Alisha vs Akeem: Moose wins via Lights Out – Long Squash
  • Mustafa Ali & Nemeths vs Hardys & Mike Santana: Jeff Hardy wins via Swanton Bomb – ***
  • Kaz & Tessa vs Joe Hendry & Masha: Hendry wins via Standing Ovation – ** 3/4
  • Barb Wire Massacre: Sami Callihan vs Mance Warner w/Steph De Lander: Callihan wins via Cactus Driver ’97 – ** 1/2
  • Inaugural International Championship: AJ Francis vs Steve Maclin vs Eric You: Maclin wins via K.I.A. – *** – TITLE CHANGE!!!

 

Results:

Laredo vs Jason Hotch w/Tasha Steelz

Laredo starts quick with a Straight Right, Tijeras, a few quick strikes, kicks Hotch out of the ring, wants a Plancha, but Tasha gets in the way to stop Laredo’s offense which gives Hotch an opening. Quick trip, a few chops and a hard Irish Whip has Laredo trying to catch his breath. Hotch tries to go for another Strong Irish Whip but Laredo reverses, two kicks, Flying Neckbreaker into a Missile Dropkick sending Hotch to the outside. Laredo finally pulls off his Suicida, and he’s rolling. Corner Forearm, Uno Mass Corkscrew Moonsaults, but Hotch manages to get away after two. A Snap Jab staggers Laredo, Ali style Outside In Rolling Neckbreaker and Hotch tries to take things to the top. But Laredo counters and Avalanche Michinoku Driver…only for two.

Laredo tries to keep things going, Back Handspring Crossbody, but Hotch catches him, big Tilt-a-Whirl Backbreaker for two. Hotch looks to the corner and then gets scared because he thinks Santana might strike, Hotch and Tasha argue, Laredo recovers and runs up the corner and hits the Laredo Fly for the win.

Jazmyn Nyx w/Fatal Influence vs Xia Brookside w/Lei Ying Lee

Jazmyn and Xia go for a chain wrestling or World of Sport kind of start. Xia even gets out of the Head Scissors with the classic Hand Stand and pop. After a little taunting, Jazmyn tries to charge but Xia loops around for a flash Cradle, Nyx kicks out quick and retreats to her Fatal Influence friends for a breather. Xia catches her with a Dropkick, a few strikes and starts putting things together until Jazmyn catches her in the corner and Snake Eyes Xia the hard way and then starts leaning her into the ropes, a few Leg Sweeps, PK kicks and Jazmyn is in control. Fisherman’s Suplex Hold from Jazmyn but Xia kicks at two. She tries to fight back up but Jazmyn is using her positioning to keep control. Bulldog into the middle buckle, puts Xia between the ropes and lays in a Round Kick to her chest and Xia has been eating offense for the last few minutes. The crowd tries to rally the little British Angel, but Jazmyn lays in some forearms, hits the ropes, Xia ducks and they hit stereo High Kicks to double down for a few moments.

Xia starts to rally, gets a few shots in, Tijeras, Xia tries Angel Wings but Jazmyn moves. Jazmyn tries to stay on her, but a Jawbreaker gives Xia time to go to the corner, Xia hits the Crossbody, Angel Wings, and looks for a DDT or something but Fatal Influence get involved distracting everyone. Lei has Fallon hanled, but Jacy is mouthing off causing Rosemary to come down and make a Mist save. Jazmyn tries to be opportunistic, but Xia blocks her move and hits the Small Package for the win.

Overbooked and timing was a bit shoddy in some spots, but not offensive. Not bad, but not good either. 

KC Navarro vs Cody Deaner

This is for a spot in the Ultimate X match. Here’s to hoping the Blessed One beats the hell out of the loser who’s about as over as Herpes. Meaning he never goes away, and he’s unlikable. Anyone that says “Funny Underdogs are needed on shows”, isn’t that like 60% of the roster? No one is funny if everyone tries to be funny. KC however, he’s fucking hilarious and amazing.

KC tries to pay off Deaner and get him to forfeit, Deaner of course does the underdog thing of fighting back, dumb looking punches, goofball corner spot that he lengthens to the put of looking dumb and not funny. Oh thank God KC hits the Spiderman in the ropes, ducks Deaner and 305 gets hit for a near fall. Now KC is rolling, nice quick offense, Snapmare, Front Roll Neck Snap, Stomp into Split into cover for only two. Deaner goes for the comeback, and a few Lariats, Bulldog, and everything looks soo stupid. Deaner puts KC in the Airplane spin, gets dizzy and then goes again, TKO for two.

Navarro tries to powder, Deaner goes after him but the ref gets Deaner off of him since KC was in the ropes, KC wraps his necklace around his knuckles and a quick Jab to the face as Deaner tries to suplex him, 1-2-3, Blessed WIN.

If Deaner was the only doofus guy he’d be fine, but when we have Santino, Arianna, Laredo, KC, Great Hands, Brian Myers, Dango, Alisha, Hendry (while not a doofus isn’t close to serious), Kaz, Elegance Brand (all 3 of them), Ryan Nemeth and those are just off the top of my head. Everyone can’t be silly or no one is silly and nothing matters.

Maggie Lee & Heather by Elegance w/Personal Concierge vs Gigi Dolin & Tatum Paxley

I’m gonna keep any Gigi drooling to a minimum since I respect my boy Wentz, but I will say, you gotta love Hot Topic Hotties. Yes I like walking red flags, I’m self aware, and okay with it.

Maggie and Gigi start, a  few quick counters, Gigi manages the Double Hook Cradle for two, then Hot Topic Hotties go tandem with a Dropkick and a Twisting Elbow for another two. Tatum is officially legal, Maggie looks for the tag but Heather wants to push Maggie more. Which is exactly how ASH treated her. Tatum turns it around, Gigi tags in, Poetry Bronco, and then Kawada Kicks from Gigi. Concierge distracts, Maggie grabs her, Heather takes the cheap shot, Suplex from Maggie for two. Heather and Maggie get some offense in together, and Heather is working Gigi over in the heel corner. Unicorn Stampede essentially. Heather goes for a pinfall and its only 2. Heather is getting frustrated, Gigi with an Upkick headscissors, Heather tries to stop the tag out, but eats the Mule Kick.

Tatum starts beating on Heather, rams Heather into Maggie, Cartwheel Peach Sunrise, tags in Gigi, Double Headbutts and Cemetery Drive from the Hot Topic Hotties and everyone wins. Jesus…will never leave this chat, he started it.

Jakara Jackson w/Lash Legend vs Dani Luna w/Jody Threat

Things start a little slow, Collar & Elbow tie up that they won’t relent for a while, Jakara tries to turn it into a Headlock Takeover, but Dani is too strong. Dani gets a few shots in, hops the rope for something but Lash makes her present felt and trips Dani while Jakara distracts the referee. The referee didn’t see anything but ejects Lash anyway. Lash won’t go, tries to intimidate the ref and say no. Jakara keeps things moving against Dani while Lash takes her sweet time slowly walking away. Jakara tries a Roll-Up but Dani too thicc to keep down. Dani fights back up, scoops Jakara and drops her unceremoniously.

Jakara starts laying in a bunch of Falling Knees and gets a quick two, before locking in a Cravat that Dani tries to fight out of. Dani counters out of it, ducks the Line, and they crash into each other with Forearms. The Double Fall Down spot is a little played out and this is only the pre-show really.

Dani levels Jakara with a few Lariats, looks for the Luna Landing, Jakara slips it so Dani comes off the ropes with a Busaiku Knee. Luna wants a Blue Thunder but Jakara gets away until Luna grabs her again for the Rebound Blue Thunder Bomb and a near fall. Luna charges the corner, misses, Jakara hits the Tornado DDT, but only two. Jakara tries to ram Dani’s head into the buckles, but Luna blocks, fires and takes Jakara’s head off, Luna Landing gets his and Dani wins!

Elijah has a promo segment and they have a really Sesame Street style “Walk this Way” words on the screen thing. When they did the bouncing ball lyrics with Ron Killings, it was at least cool. This comes off as corny and low budget public broadcasting crap just for Elijah to announce an open challenge at Rebellion or something. Admittedly I zoned out cause I figured it would be nothing of note.

Leon Slater vs Brian Myers

Myers and Slater start in a shoving match jawing at each other, and then Leon lays in a Shoulder Tackle off the ropes, some jumping crap and Myers is getting bounced from corner to corner like a dork. Leon tries to continue the Around the World but a punch, Thrust Kick and Irish Whip across the ring gives him some confidence, but he eats the Feint Mule Kick, Back Handspring Back Elbow…and again System matches are “look stupid and get beat up for 70% of the match until a shortcut can be taken”. Speaking of short cuts, Leon goes for his Corner Leap, Myers guards from it, Leon repositions but gets tripped and eats a Spear. Then…we go to commercial.

Coming out of the commercials Myers is still in control. Leon slips out of a suplex and then connects with a flurry of offense, Myers eats more kicks than I can count, powders, Leon does his corner post leap, comes in and looks to win but an Implant DDT, dick kick and Roster Cut gives Myers the win.

Overall  iMPACT! Rating: 5/10

Nothing special but at least it made some sense and was a better than the last few episodes. Low bar comparatively. Now immediately onto Unbreakable! So because this is a long night, I figured I’d do a Watch A Long with Mat Sarpraicone over on Dirt Sheet Radio because I have zero faith in Unbreakable being worth the 2-3 hours it will take to watch it.

So you’ll get quick results with ratings and an overall thoughts at the end of Unbreakable from me, because it’s late and I needed something to keep me awake.

Overall Unbreakable Rating: 4.5/10

The iMPACT! episode was easier to watch and digest, three Triple Threats is too many and the Main Event being a slow paced triple threat after a Barb Wire match and a bunch of faster matches really doesn’t resonate well with fans. Even though I didn’t love the Sami vs Mance match, ending on carnage and the “babyface” winning would’ve been a much better way to send the crowd home happy and we wouldn’t have needed so much time fill during the last hour of the show.

Maclin being the inaugural International Champion is cool, setting up the first defense against Eric Young is good for their story, so most of the marks were hit. It just was too damn slow and had no business being a main event. Champions vs Challengers was okay, but it only really picked up when Masha and Tessa were mixing it up. I liked Moose having the extended squash match for shits and giggles, but two Triples back to back to open the show is an easy way to burn out a crowd. Sure the Moose match was an extended piss break to recharge the crowd, but the card was just laid out awkwardly and things felt like far more of a chore than they should have.

All in all this was a very lame event. Yes I get it was purely stop gap to take advantage of WrestleMania weekend, but with Rebellion next week, we all knew it wasn’t gonna shake things up too much. But hot damn was I about to fall asleep if I wasn’t doing the watch-a-long to not pass out.

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