Entertainment
Andrew’s Top Albums, TV Series, Wrestlers & Matches of 2021
So I’ve done this the last two years 2019 – 2020; and each year it changes slightly. Last year I dropped movies from the list because well…we know why. This year the wrestling section will be a bit smaller because I couldn’t sit through any product this year without having to do it for coverage.
That being said, the albums aspect became a more prevalent focus on my writing and most of the ones in my Top 12 were covered in articles here. I managed to find something to help trudge through the here; so let’s see if any of my favorites are a shared feeling!
Top 12 Best Albums:
- Weezer: OK Human – As I said in the article, this album was not met with as glowing of an interpretation as I had. I was definitely in an interesting headspace through this year, so that could’ve helped. But if you enjoy interesting concepts, a theatrical approach to the song transitions and songs with awkward yet upbeat depression beats, this is definitely worth a listen! Notable Songs: All My Favorite Songs // Here Comes The Rain
- Diablo Swing Orchestra: Swagger and Stroll Down the Rabbit Hole – Sweden does it again with bands that come out of nowhere and just really hook me. Calling themselves avant-garde metal is of course a tad pretentious, but their music is such a fun mess/journey that you can overlook the theater kid need to be “unique” in the band labeling. If you like music, you’ll probably find a song that fits your taste through their discography. From Muse to Mariachi…it’s a bit of everything. Notable Songs: Celebremos Lo Inevitable // War Painted Valentine
- Knife: Knife – Now I was not expecting a Black Metal band to ever rank this high for me, let alone Blackened Speed Punk from Germany. But there’s something fantastic about the throwback approach, melodic while aggressive song construction and since the vocals are just gruff and not Cookie Monster swallowing a microphone…this was just fantastic. Definitely not for everyone, but if you’re more of a modern metal or Venom fan, this could check boxes for you. Notable Songs: K.N.I.F.E. // Demon Wind
- Aeonblack: The Time Will Come –A NWOBHM inspired band from Germany. This was one of the more impressive albums from lesser known bands. It has a lot of Judas Priest influence from the vocals to a lot of the rhythm section. You also get moments of Thrash and Power, so if Rob Halford was the lead singer of a Megadeth/Cryonic Temple fusion band, you’d get this band. Aeonblack has only been around since 2003, but most of the members were from Groggy Elks which was formed in the 80s. So the 80s Power/Thrash stylings makes far more sense the further you dig. Notable Songs: Fire Wheels // The Phantom of Pain
- Blacktop Mojo: Blacktop Mojo – A funny music video for Wicked Woman put this band on the map just in time for their newer album to drop onto my radar. While my only real criticism was that most of the album is a little sad and not really a “cruising” album, it’s all done well. The music matches the lyrics perfectly in each song and it’s hard to ignore such great craftsmanship even if the subject matter gets redundant. So if you have an ex you’re mad at or need a band to help you verbalize a rough patch, give this a listen! Notable Songs: Cough // Wicked Woman
- Gojira: Fortitude – Well now Gojira is usually not my favorite genre either. But starting with their album From Mars to Sirius, I found that I can tolerate their approach. More of a progressive/technical death metal doesn’t put a huge emphasis on the Cookie Monster and allows you to get lost in the musical ambiance and actually enjoy the deep lyrical quality. Also being technical/progressive they venture outside of the pure death metal aspects of just blast beats and guttural vocals. This album is much like most of their discography where it’s intricate, smart and really fun to listen to. I know this was some people’s Album of the Year, but I wasn’t quite THAT blown away. Notable Songs: Another World // The Sphinx
- Twelve Foot Ninja: Vengeance – Well I’m actually mad. I recently read that the band is parting ways with their current vocalist on amicable terms so he’ll stick around for the current tour and help them fill his spot. These guys were such a breath of fresh air in music, and the vocals were definitely a big factor. I’ve always said they were like Mike Patton on an acid trip, so unless they get Mike Patton to join; I’m just tempering my expectations for the next album. This one was great, lots of fun, lots of different genres contained in one song, ear worms everywhere. So take in the really tall ninja as it is now, in case it changes for the worse! Notable Songs: Long Way Home // Over and Out
- Exodus: Persona Non Grata –There was a big theme of older bands who maybe fell off a little, finding their footing coming out of the pandemic. Exodus was no different. As much as I enjoyed their 80s stuff, multiple singer changes, direction changes and just a really spotty discography had them fall off pretty hard for me. After going back to Zetro Souza for the last album, they continued with him here and this was actually wonderful. It was aggressive while keeping the 80s tongue in cheek moments as well. Can’t overlook the educational aspects of some songs from Thalidomide to political situations. This covers a wide breadth of topics really well. Notable Songs: Prescribing Horror // R.E.M.F.
- Billie Eilish: Happier Than Ever – See, not everything I ranked well was Hard Rock or Metal. Billie is an interesting situation where I feel like she gets unnecessary hatred because her songs are vapid so people think she’s trying too hard to be deep. But the songs are written with such a simple note of relatability, that anyone hating is just doing it purely to be “edgy”, but I guess Hot Topic exists for those people still. I can only hope they are legitimately 15 and not mentally 15. Another album that was generally depressing throughout, but it makes sense given the state of the world. Clever lyrics, catchy enough beats. There’s no club bangers like Bad Guy, but the album itself is worth more than just one song on repeat. Notable Songs: NDA // Halley’s Comet
- Midnight Spell: Sky Destroyer –Another one of the NWOBHM inspired bands. Out of Miami, we get a surprisingly wonderful band that also sounds like they’re straight out of the 80s. Sonically there’s a bit of a Def Leppard/Scorpions vibe and I’m here for it. Great vocal range, smooth and fairly ridiculous lyrical content in the cheesey 80s nostalgia way. A definite diamond in the rough. Hell, Lady in the Moonlight is probably my most listened to song this year, it’s just soo good. Notable Songs: Lady of the Moonlight // To The Stars
- Accept: Too Mean To Die – We brought up older bands who came back to form and it was never more evident than with Accept. Dude this reminds me of my thoughts on Body Count last year. A band I all but forgot existed because the music has generally been awful for far too long, just punches you in the mouth with some fantastic balance. Even though Udo is again no longer with the band for the 3842 time, their new singer does great. Mark Tornillo is an awesome addition and really reignited my interest in the band. Notable Songs: Overnight Sensation // Best is Yet to Come
- The Offspring: Let The Bad Times Roll –Another band that was hit with awkward news shortly after I did the review. Not like that changes my opinion, but I can see if it soured people on the new album. While it wasn’t a complete return to form like a few of the other bands, it definitely felt more like their classic Pop Punk days and less like the post-Splinter sound. Also I really enjoyed the re-imagining of Gone Away, it was a nice evolution using the same words just a more stripped down version for new emotions. Notable Songs: Opioid Diaries // We Never Have Sex Anymore
Top 10 TV Shows:
- Arcane (Netflix) – Now this rightfully got a lot of hype. I’ve played League of Legends (the source material) since 2013 so I’m fully aware of these character and the fact the game community is complete garbage. However, aside from episode 1 being the typical “setting the table” style of presentation, this might be the best animated series I’ve ever seen. The struggle between Zaun and Piltover, hell even within both nations. Struggles mirrored between Silco and Vander/Jinx and Vi. Silco’s evolution from seeming like a typical bad guy to being on the best representations of a father in media. Hell they even acknowledge Vi and Caitlyn as being a thing, used normally in a derogatory way from Jinx but it was never really rejected. So you get politics, characterization, emotion, great fights… just all around near perfection. Riot proves once again, as long as it’s not the actual League of Legends game, they can do things competently.
- Loudermilk (Prime) – A little bit of an exception I’m making here. Originally released in 2018 on the AT&T Audience Network, it was left homeless in 2020 when Audience ceased operations. So Amazon purchased the 3 seasons and made it available to US audience in March 2021. So it technically isn’t a 2021 series, but since it was on an obscure network and Amazon saved it, I’m giving it the credit it deserves. Ron Livingston (main guy from Office Space) is the titular character Sam Loudermilk, a former music critic, recovering alcoholic, leader of a substance abuse group, and generally just a curmudgeon; so I relate to a few of those. Will Sasso plays his best friend and sponsor, shenanigans thusly ensue. The comedy is dry and offbeat much like Office Space, but it’s quite relatable if not exaggerated a little because it’s a show. Give this show a check, it’s really complex and yet very easy to get absorbed in to.
- What We Do In The Shadows S.3 (Hulu/FXX) – The Vampire based mockumentary directed and partially written by Taika Waititi and James Clement. If you are aware of the movie, or the other 2 seasons, I don’t really need to say much. Smart references, clever resolution and just general buffoonery to keep everything moving forward without feeling too serious until it has to. This definitely walks that line between insanely stupid and so moronic it’s genius. Which is what makes it so high on my list this year.
- My Name (Netflix) – After watching Squid Game I went into a little bit of a Korean series rabbit hole. This series focuses on a young girl, whose father is killed for his affiliation with a drug gang. After trying to get the police to give her answers, she turns to her only option, the gang themselves. The leader of the gang takes her in to train her to be a killer, at times even acting like a surrogate father, before sending her to infiltrate the police to find her answers. While I won’t spoil the ending here, the twists are fun, the acting is pretty damn solid and when you’re supposed to hate someone…you really hate them. Also makes me realize that South Korea kinda looks like America in 90s, just with current technology. So it’s got an oddly retro cop drama appeal while being modern.
- Squid Game (Netflix) – The show that took the internet by storm. Okay, so the hype was mostly warranted though I feel the last say, 1.5 episodes really hurt the show. I loved the pacing up until we are supposed to be getting to the grand climax. Then a kind of wet fart of a finish into malaise from the main character just because his motivation for winning was no longer around. It felt insanely forced when the show painted him as a miscreant with the worst luck but generally good intentions. I also hate the last few scenes. Instead of moving forward he opts to abandon his daughter AGAIN just to go do what? Play hero? Feed a second season in an inane way? Oh you have no clue how much that last bit made me lose some respect for the show on a whole. The first 7.5 episodes were nearly perfect though, so even if I take points away it’s not nearly enough to drop this into the garbage can.
- Cobra Kai S.3 (Netflix) – Now this doesn’t rank as high as the last season, mostly because it felt a little padded. Getting the Karate Kid 2 trip to Japan in there, Daniel’s osmosis way of mastering concepts and the slow burn to Johnny and Daniel finally joining forces, just felt like too much filler. The touch with Elizabeth Shue having to return to be the bridge between them when she was original the cause of their hatred, was pretty poetic and not a bad angle. References are still great, Miguel’s recovery was fun, and the life turmoil from all perspectives was relatable. I guess only other small nitpick is Tory’s story felt a little ignored, so general pacing issues and personal gripes with focus knocked it down a little, but it was still pretty damn good.
- Cowboy Bebop (Netflix) – The series that got cancelled like two weeks after release made my Top shows?! Yes, yes it did. This was a great branch in the Cowboy Bebop universe. Spike was wonderfully portrayed by John Cho, he was more human, more relatable and just very fun. Daniella Pineda’s Faye was nearly perfect for the same reasons, because the anime was unrealistic in how always cool everyone was. Most of the people who complained about this don’t understand a few things. Firstly, it wasn’t the anime so people expecting exact copies of personalities, looks and stories are idiots. Secondly, the way the fights and some scenes were shot is on par with the fact the source material is an anime and lines up with the slightly campier approach that Japanese and Korean action tends to take. Lastly, it was supposed to be like the Evangelion rebuild movies where it immersed you into the world with familiar stories and interactions before taking things in its own direction. YES, I will concede that Vicious was too cartoony. They made him Vicious in the over dramatic little brother way, so that wasn’t really a good characterization, but given the way they backed things up and how they adjusted Julia…it works better than the anime version. So if you actually understood the Cowboy Bebop universe, you enjoyed this and I honestly liked this series more than the anime. The anime is just “too cool for school” so people who think that is superior don’t understand the first thing about character depth.
- Miracle Workers S.3 (TBS) – Daniel Radcliffe has become one of my favorite actors post-Harry Potter. His comedic work in all 3 of these seasons is great, especially paired with Steve Buschemi. This season it’s the Oregon Trail, and the jokes are amazing and wonderfully topical. Smart humor, dark humor, great satirical tone and a throwback like Little House on the Prairie kind of intro. Just wonderfully done, watch all of it. Heaven, Middle Ages and Oregon Trail, comedy gold.
- The Witcher S.2 (Netflix) – So the first season was a smash hit, and with Henry Cavill being something of a nerd himself, the world feels very true to what I’ve seen of the games personally (I haven’t read the books). This season split up the main group but slowly brings them back together in logical ways. While this season focuses a little more on relationships, personal growth and story, it’s never really slow. There’s a lot of places to think about the information you’re being given; even if the action is a little sparse and lacking. Gerolt’s relationship with Cirilla really evolved in a logical way and it comes to a great head when Cirilla and Yennefer have a conversation about helping him. In a cold unfeeling world, the concepts of love ring true strongly in this season; just many different variations of love. The Witcher Keep was also a great addition to the cast.
- WandaVision (Disney+) – Some may be shocked that more of these Marvel series didn’t make it on my list, but come on now, are you really shocked? All of the series started off slow, and this was no different. Funnily enough, I hated episode 1, to me it wasn’t an homage to the Dick Van Dyke show, it was just a hollow mockery that came off flat, forced and poorly acted. Now that being said, episode 2 grabbed me a bit more and the third one actually sold me. None of these shows blew me away, but the gradual progression of watching Wanda’s psyche crack as she processed her grief in the form of her own little self-isolation bubble was pretty fantastic. Also getting the cameo from X-Men movies Quicksilver was a cool touch on top of giving the Marvel universe the answer to how “mutants” came to be now that they have control over that IP. So while it wasn’t close to perfect, I feel it rebounded the best and kept me engaged from a deeper level than just liking these characters from movies or a comic book.
– This year has definitely been more entertainment focused for me since wrestling in general has become a chore. Nothing was overly captivating and even for what was good, it wasn’t enough to get me to engage in the product (besides needing to cover IMPACT). 2022 promises to start off stronger with NOAH kicking things off in Budokan and NJPW actually treating the Wrestle Kingdom shows like something interesting.
That allows for some hope, but here’s the wrestling aspects of this article.
Top 5 Wrestlers:
- Roman Reigns (WWE): Now none of his matches may have made my Top 10, but that doesn’t mean I’m ignorant to his overall impact this year. He’s been a dominant champion, turned his career around, effectively carried the company and finally has the swagger and confidence to be someone the fans don’t want to Boo out of the building. WWE isn’t built around 5 star matches and honestly, pro wrestling for most of history wasn’t focused on that either. They make characters, they make brands to buy into. Roman is the most lucrative brand in wrestling currently.
- Shingo Takagi (NJPW): Though it was a generally down year for New Japan, Shingo lit things up in nearly every big singles match he had. When he lost the New Japan Cup to Ospreay and then the following title challenge, myself and many others thought New Japan was really missing the boat. Then Ospreay got hurt, and they had to pivot. Shingo may have honed his skills in Dragon Gate, and he may never be seen as a “New Japan guy”, but in 2022, he was the only guy in New Japan that mattered. So they avoided a major catastrophe by deciding to use him as a Plan B. Now if we could just get them to stop with EVIL.
- Bryan Danielson (AEW): Much like Roman, even though I can’t stand the AEW product, I give aspects credit where they deserve it. The story telling is still childishly bad, the character work is even worse and it’s just a giant eFed for kids who weren’t old enough to enjoy the Attitude Era, but Bryan Danielson at least adds in-ring legitimacy. Completely eclipsing Adam Cole’s debut, and being the only thing to keep people buzzing after CM Punk’s initial pop turned into literal no tangible change in viewership or product, he’s all they got. The whole company is a joke, Tony Khan just shot a lot of his good faith in the foot with the Big Swole interaction, but maybe Danielson can work some Mania 30 level of magic to bring people back on board.
- Syuri (Stardom): A Joshi wrestler! Nani the fuck, am I right? But let’s be serious, she made headlines with Utami Hayashishita after their Cinderella overtime draw match from Meltzer and the rest of the internet. THEN, she caps off her 2021 by finally winning the belt from Utami. Syuri has always been a legit and accomplished female wrestler, with a background in MMA, Kickboxing (championships in both as well) they don’t get much better than Syuri. She fell into the background early in the DDM days when they were pushing Giulia to the moon, but since she was out, Stardom decided to steer into serious wrestling for at least the main event. Syuri being the hurdle that Utami never could beat, and then the person to end Utami’s 409 day reign was a great capstone to Syuri’s year and solidified her as a major player for overall wrestler of the year.
- Josh Alexander (IMPACT): Now this may feel like a biased pick since IMPACT is the only thing I’ve really kept up with, but he got great matches out of so many different people, was involved in major angles and has a lot of general good faith in the IWC. A great technical wrestler with decent enough speaking skills to not seem like a buffoon, but the type to let his actions do the talking. He’s been one of the major shining stars of this current iteration of IMPACT, and should be in line to get a decent Heavyweight title reign in 2022.
Top 10 Matches:
- Syuri vs Utami Hayashishita: World of Stardom Title – Tokyo Dream Cinderella Special
- Walter vs Ilja Dragunov: NXT UK Championship – NXT: Takeover 36
- Shingo Takagi vs Hiroshi Tanahashi: NEVER Openweight – New Beginning Nagoya
- Shingo Takagi vs Jeff Cobb: NEVER Openweight – Wrestle Kingdom 15
- Takashi Sugiura vs Kazuyuki Fujita: GHC National Championship – NOAH The Glory
- Shingo Takagi vs Will Ospreay: – NJC Finals
- Josh Alexander vs Chris Sabin: X Division Championship – Victory Road
- Kento Miyahara vs Jake Lee vs Yuma Aoyagi: Triple Crown Championship – AJPW Champions Night
- Bryan Danielson vs Minoru Suzuki: – Buy In
- Willie Mack vs Moose: I Quit Match – Genesis
– There we go, a lot of my top matches are focused towards the front half of the year, but that’s to be expected since I generally lost interest. Aside from things being very Shingo Takagi heavy, I think there’s way more variety in the 10 than I expected. But that’s all for 2021, now let’s hope 2022 starts strong to help me find that spark again!
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The Legend of Zelda: The Ring of Destiny, Chapter 64
HPW Fyter Feast is about to stuff you full of action! Death Mountain Qualifier, Million Rupee Roulette, and the first-ever Championship Charcuterie! Will this night earn five stars?
OFFICIAL RESULTS
- HPW Death Mountain Championship Qualifier: Ralph VS Ghirahim VS Militron VS Igos du Ikana VS Dark Hammer VS Grim Creeper; Hammer loses and the rest advance to HyruleMania 5.
- Million Rupee Championship Wrestling Roulette Casket Match: Kevin Gibdo VS Scaldera; Kevin wins and retains the title.
- Championship Charcuterie: Link VS Thunderbird VS Osphala VS Ladrona VS Fin Balure VS Mack Quackson VS Rick Quackson; Fin wins and earns the all-you-can-eat dinner for two at Conundrum.
PLAY BY PLAY
HPW and HXS TV set the scene!
Anyone hungry? How’s your appetite for destruction? Because tonight, you’ll have a buffet of brutality to choose from as Fyter Feast is about to get cooking! The SEVEN champions of HPW will be in one match! No titles on the line, but a fabulous prize awaits the winner. Will it be Link, Thunderbird, Osphala, Ladrona or a member of Arrow Club that wins a date to Conundrum? Plus, we will once again spin the wheel and make the deal in Wrestling Roulette! Kevin Gibdo knows the UnderWorld Order wants their Million Rupee Championship back, and Scaldera is looking to make Kevin into a roasted Gibdo! What dish of destiny awaits?
But first, the opening course will be more about the loser than the winner! Six stars that stood out during the Clash of Fates will now battle to earn spots at HyruleMania’s traditional Death Mountain Championship ladder match, and the one who loses must watch from home! HPW Fyter Feast in the North Akkala Valley starts now!
HPW Death Mountain Championship Qualifier: Ralph VS Ghirahim VS Militron VS Igos du Ikana VS Dark Hammer VS Grim Creeper!
The Lad from Labrynna, the Living Blade, the Armored Annihilator, the Ruler of Ruin, the Doombringer’s #Bulkzilla and the UnderWorld Order’s underhanded underling are the lucky six chosen from the 31 flavors that didn’t win this year’s Hyrule Warriors match. And now, one will be crossed off the HyruleMania menu! Who will taste bitter defeat to open Fyter Feast?
The bell rings and the six watch each other. Then Ghirahim throws hands on Igos! Ralph runs up on Militron and Hammer chases Creeper. Creeper bails out of the ring and Hammer pursues. Militron shoves Ralph away, but then Ralph dodges a lariat. Ralph comes back to DROPKICK, but Militron stays up! Militron runs at Ralph but Ralph DUMPS him out of the ring! Ralph then aims to TORNILLO PLANCHA! Down goes Militron and the fans fire up! Igos dodges a shot from Ghirahim to KICK a leg! Igos starts up the strike fest, but Ghirahim avoids the knee thrust! Ghirahim CHOPS Igos, but Igos spins through to ROCK Ghirahim!
Creeper slips back into the ring, and he stomps Hammer as Hammer slides in. Creeper drops an elbow on Hammer’s back, then throws in elbows and knees. Hammer rolls under the bottom rope but Creeper stomps him on the apron. Ralph slingshots over the ropes to DDT Creeper! Cover, but Hammer CLUBS Ralph! The fans rally, and Hammer drags Ralph up. Hammer TOSSES Ralph to a corner, Militron gets on the apron, but Hammer DECKS Militron! Igos BOOTS Hammer into the same corner as Ralph! Ghirahim runs at Igos but Igos sends him into Hammer and Ralph! Igos SOBATS Ghirahim, ROCKS Hammer, and ROUNDHOUSES Ralph!
The fans fire up as Igos is the only one standing! But Creeper is creeping, and he CLUBS Igos from behind! Igos stumbles forward, Creeper stalks behind him, and Creeper puts Igos in a corner. Creeper stomps a mudhole in, then digs his boots in. Igos grabs at Creeper but can’t reach him, and Creeper doesn’t have to stop because there’s no disqualifications! Hammer reels Creeper in for a BIG back suplex! Cover, Ralph breaks it! Ralph gets payback, and he kicks Hammer to ropes. Militron is back, Ralph runs up, but Militron FLAPJACKS him! Militron and Hammer both stand up, and the fans fire up as these two stare down.
Militron pushes Hammer, but Hammer pushes back! The two RAM shoulders, and RAM, and RAM! They egg each other on, then they start throwing haymakers! Militron gets the edge, then winds up, but Hammer CLUBS the lariat away! Militron spins to ELBOW Hammer! Militron runs, but Hammer CLOBBERS Militron! Ghirahim returns to JUMP KNEE Hammer! Igos JUMP KNEES Ghirahim! Hammer rebounds to SHOULDER TACKLE Igos! Ralph ROLLING NECKBREAKERS Hammer! Creeper has a chair! He JAMS Ralph, then SMACKS him on the back! The fans boo but again, no disqualifications.
Creeper SMACKS Hammer on the back, SMACKS Militron on the back, then SMACKS Igos on the back! Creeper is all fired up but the fans boo. But then everyone else gets up and they all glare at Creeper! The fans fire up as Creeper turns around to see how deeply in trouble he is. Igos BOOTS Creeper, Ralph URAKENS, Hammer HEADBUTTS, and then Militron reels Creeper in, suplex to PILEDRIVER!! Creeper sputters away from taking the “Impact Driver,” but now that leaves the others standing tall. Militron ROCKS Hammer, Ralph URAKENS Militron! Igos hits Ralph with ELEGY OF THE END! Cover, HIDDEN BLADE from Ghirahim!!
Ghirahim hurries to cover Igos, but Hammer SPLASHES DOWN on them! The fans fire up, and then Hammer drags Ghirahim up in a waistlock! GERMAN SUPLEX! Ghirahim flounders away, and Militron BODY CHECKS Hammer! Militron drags Hammer up to a fireman’s carry, for a WIDOWMAKER!! Cover, Hammer LOSES!
Loser: Darkhammer, by pinfall (Ralph, Ghirahim, Militron, Igos du Ikana & Grim Creeper advance)
No doom will be brought to HyruleMania, and Militron has the momentum! Will this Face of Evil soon stand atop Death Mountain? Or did this match show Thunderbird all he needs to know to stay on top?
Backstage interview with Zelda.
Seres is with the Princess of Hyrule and congratulates her on, well, not winning this year’s Hyrule Warriors match, but managing the first ever draw in a Hyrule Warriors match. That means she will still challenge for the Undisputed Triforce World Championship at HyruleMania 5. Zelda thanks Seres, and says this isn’t really the result she wanted, but it’s a lot better than Ganon winning outright and her missing out on the title match entirely. Seres notes it is rather serendipitous that the title match is a Triple Threat, just like the first time a Triforce Champion was crowned. Zelda says yes, that’s certainly a twist of fate.
Well, that will be HyruleMania’s main event. How is Zelda feeling about tonight’s main event? Zelda asks back, “What about it?” Well, surely she’ll be cheering Link on so that they can go to Conundrum for dinner. W-What? Why would she care if she goes to dinner somewhere with Link? Oh, well, Seres just thought- Thought what? That they’re dating? That if Link wins that dinner reservation, he’d take her there? Okay, sure, they’ve gone out to eat together, but not on dates. And sometimes, it wasn’t just the two of them, his sister would come along. Zelda doesn’t care if he wins that prize or not.
Well, it’s not that she doesn’t care if he wins. She doesn’t want him to lose, either. There are seven people in the match, he might not even be in the decision. So then, if Link wins, and if he were to ask her, would she accept the invitation? Zelda’s a bit hesitant, but she stammers out a “Maybe.” It’d be free food, and who says no to free food? Seres says that’s a good point. Seres wishes Zelda good luck on her date, but then instantly regrets saying that. Zelda blushes and says it won’t be a date. Zelda’s flustered and just storms off, how will Championship Charcuterie affect the relationship of princess and hero?
Million Rupee Championship Wrestling Roulette: Kevin Gibdo VS Scaldera!
The Gibdo of All Gibdos and The Burning Abomination have gone back and forth in their blood feud, and now they fight for The UnderWorld Order’s most valued possession! But with the gold comes the gamble! Time to spin the wheel and make the deal! And for this match, the wheel chooses… CASKET MATCH! Scaldera is at first frightened, as he was sealed away in a casket before. But will he get to return the favor now?
The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see who closes the lid on this rivalry!
The bell rings, the fans rally up, and the two monsters feel things out. They tie up, Kevin headlocks but Scaldera throws body shots. Kevin is already bringing Scaldera towards the casket side of the ring! Scaldera powers out, and hurries away, definitely still traumatized by the casket. The two tie up again, and Kevin again headlocks. Scaldera powers up and out, but Kevin runs him over! Things keep moving, Kevin blocks a hip toss to hip toss back! Then he arm-drags! Kevin is throwing his weight around, or rather throwing Scaldera’s weight around, and again powers him towards the casket! Scaldera pushes against the ropes!
The fans rally but Scaldera slips around to slip free. Scaldera wants this to stop but it can’t until someone goes into the casket. Scaldera headlocks now, but Kevin powers up and out. Scaldera runs Kevin over, but Kevin’s right up. The two tie up again, and Scaldera headlocks again. Kevin powers up and out, but Scaldera runs him over! Scaldera runs up but Kevin trips him! Kevin drops an elbow on Scaldera’s leg, then turns him over to a HALF CRAB! Scaldera endures, goes for ropes, but he’s also near the casket! Pain and fear fight in the mind of Scaldera, and he crawls under the bottom rope to scrape Kevin off him!
Scaldera scrambles away, the fans taunt him with, “Scaredy Cat! Scaredy Cat!” Scaldera walks away, but Kevin storms out after him! Kevin catches up to Scaldera, turns him around, and knees him down low! The fans cheer and Kevin whips Scaldera. Scaldera reverses and Kevin hits the side of the casket! Kevin slumps down, Scaldera beats him down with fists and stomps! Scaldera throws fast hands, then SMACKS Kevin off the lid! Kevin sputters but Scaldera stands him up. Scaldera says let’s see how you like it! He SMACKS Kevin off the lid again! Scaldera pushes Kevin into the ring, then storms in after.
Scaldera throws more hands, taunts Kevin, then fires more hands in the corner. The fans boo but Scaldera soaks up the heat. Scaldera stomps Kevin, his confidence returning. The fans rally for Kevin, Scaldera says shut up, and he fires more hands. Scaldera roars, gets right in Kevin’s face and says this is the UnderWorld Order’s world! But Kevin jumps up for a TRIANGLE HOLD! Scaldera can only suffer as Kevin uses ropes for leverage! Scaldera fades, and Kevin drags him down to the mat! The fans fire up as Kevin squeezes the air out of Scaldera! But wait, Hollywood ReDead rushes out here! ReDead gets in the ring to stomp away on Kevin!
The fans boo but ReDead can do this under No Disqualifications. ReDead stomps away on the ropes, then roars, “I’m THE MAAAN!” ReDead whips Kevin to LARIAT him down! The ref reprimands but that’s all he can do. ReDead stands Scaldera up, they fire up and then bring Kevin up. DOUBLE SUPLEX! Scaldera drops an ELBOW, ReDead drops an ELBOW! The uWo drag Kevin over and want the casket to open! The casket opens, and VOLGA is inside! The Dragon Knight rushes out of the casket, he must’ve known the uWo would pull this! The fans fire up as Volga fires hands and kicks on ReDead & Scaldera!
Volga fires a strike fest, then a WHEEL KICK on Scaldera! Then he fires strikes on ReDead! ReDead shoves Volga away but Volga runs back up to CROSSBODY ReDead up and out! The fans fire up as ReDead scrambles away into the crowd, Volga giving chase! But back at ringside, Scaldera is pushing the casket away from ringside. Scaldera doesn’t want to touch it but he doesn’t want it ringside anymore. But wait! Kevin is back up and he SMACKS Scaldera off the lid! Kevin whips, Scaldera reverses, Kevin hits steel steps, legs first! Kevin takes a tumble, but Scaldera starts ripping up floor mats!
The fans boo again but Scaldera is going past safe restrictions! Scaldera SMACKS Kevin off the steps, SMACKS him off the apron, then rains down hands. Kevin sputters, and Scaldera goes back to the casket. No one else is in there, so Scalder takes aim! Scaldera runs up to RAM Kevin into the apron! Kevin sputters on the floor while fans lose their minds. Scladera stomps Kevin, drags him up, and puts him in the ring. The refs make sure the casket is still in one piece, but Scaldera clamps onto Kevin with a COBRA CLUTCH! Kevin endures as Scaldera thrashes him around! The fans rally but Kevin’s already fading!
The casket opens, Scaldera works to roll Kevin in! Kevin is in, Scaldera grabs the lid, but Kevin sticks his arm out! Scaldera slaps at the arm but Kevin still grabs at him! Kevin then fights with both hands to get out of the casket! The fans fire up as now Kevin drags Scaldera off apron and into the casket! Kevin rains down fists, then goes to the apron. GUILLOTINE LEG DROP slams the lid on Scaldera’s back!! The fans lose their minds all over again while Scaldera is stuck half in and half out. Kevin drags Scaldera out of the casket to top this off! Choke grip, but Scaldera HEADBUTTS back! Scaldera runs up to fire hands!
Scaldera whips corner to corner hard! But Kevin BOOTS back! Kevin runs, but into a CYCLONE KICK!! Cover out of instinct but Scaldera remembers, this is a Casket Match, not No Disqualifications! Scaldera is frustrated, and he drags Kevin over. The casket is open again, and Scaldera pushes Kevin back in. Scaldera grabs the lid again, but now Kevin grabs Scaldera! The fans fire up as Kevin throws hands again! Kevin rises up, ELBOWS Scaldera, but Scaldera hits back! They brawl with big haymakers and the fans fire up! Kevin whips, Scaldera reverses, but Kevin hits a RUNNING DDT! Kevin aims and the fans fire up!
Scaldera rises, Kevin has the choke grip! CHOKE SLAM! Scaldera sputters but the fans want more! Kevin slashes his throat and he watches Scaldera stumble. Kevin scoops, positions Scaldera, TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER!! The casket opens, Kevin rolls Scaldera, and stomps him into the casket for good measure. Kevin slams the lid shut and wins!
Winner: Kevin Gibdo (still Million Rupee Champion)
ReDead, Death Sword, Gomess, and now Scaldera, the uWo is running out of chances to get their belt back! Will they ever- Wait, the lights go down? The fans have a little freakout, but when the lights come back, IT’S MAJORA! Kevin turns around in time for the TORPEDO MAJORA!! The fans boo as Majora stoops over Kevin, looking down at him. Then, Majora slowly looks over to the Million Rupee Championship. He slowly steps over to the belt, then picks it up. Majora slowly looks up at the camera, then stands up tall to hold the belt over his head. Majora may not always show up, but he is a member of the uWo. Will Majora be the one to bring this belt back to the UnderWorld Order?
Backstage interview with Ganon.
Seres is now with the Gerudo Ace and congratulates him on his part in the first-ever double win in the Hyrule Warriors match. Ganon thanks her, but she does have to point out the controversy of how he took Harlequin’s spot in the match. She also wants to know how it is that Ganon has the Faces of Evil under his command when he also leads The Dark Forces. Ganon says it’s been a whole month, did she not put two and two together? The Faces of Evil and The Dark Forces are now one faction. A super faction, even! Harlequin was more than happy to hand that spot in the match to Ganon, because you always bet on the Gerudo Ace.
As for the Triforce World Championship, Ganon couldn’t be happier that it’s now a Triple Threat! And a Triple Threat of him, Zelda, and Link. Call it fate, call it karma, but Ganon is more than ready to redeem himself from that very first Triforce Championship match. Sure, he held the title later that year, but he still wants to right the wrong of April 1st, 2020. He’ll gladly powerbomb Zelda through a table again, and then he’ll make sure to kick “her little boyfriend” right in the head. What better way to ring in the new year than with a new world champion, huh? And you can bet he’ll be partying like it’s 1999 after that!
And really, neither Link or Zelda should feel bad about it, because at least they’ll have each other. Ganon grins and leaves, but will he really make up for his past failure? Or will history have a way of repeating itself?
Championship Charcuterie: Link VS Thunderbird VS Osphala VS Ladrona VS Fin Balure VS Mack Quackson VS Rick Quackson!
For the first time in HPW history, all SEVEN champions are in action at once! And for the first time in HPW history, there will be a prize that isn’t a championship! Only one person can win the all-you-can-eat dinner for two, so who will taste sweet, sweet victory while the others feast on defeat?
This may be every person for themselves, but Arrow Club still enters all together. The fans are already rowdy before the bell, dueling over their favorites. The bell rings and the seven all watch each other closely. Ladrona bails out right as the HPW World Trios Champions brawl with Link, Osphala and Thunderbird! The fans fire up while Fin puts Link in a corner, Mack puts Osphala in another, and Rick puts Thunderbird in a third. They all climb up onto the corners and fire the fans up, only for Link, Osphala and Thunderbird to all trip them up! Link whips Fin corner to corner but so do Osphala and Thunderbird with The Young Ducks.
Fin passes between The Ducks before the Ducks dosido with each other. Osphala and Thunderbird each dodge The Ducks, sending them into buckles. Link runs corner to corner at Fin, but Fin goes up and out to the apron. Link hits buckles, Fin GAMANGIRIS Link! Thunderbird hits a SPLASH on Rick while Osphala hits a SHINING WIZARD on Mack! Then they each BULLDOG the Ducks down! Osphala and Thunderbird stare down as they stand up, but Link stumbles over. Osphala and Thunderbird DOUBLE HIP TOSS Link down! Ladrona YANKS Fin off the apron! Ladrona RAMS Fin into railing then hurries away.
Osphala is distracted by that, and Thunderbird rolls him up! TWO, and both men hurry to their feet. Osphala swings but Thunderbird ducks it to run and springboard, FLYING ARM-DRAG! Osphala tumbles and Ladrona drags him out of the ring! Ladrona sends him into railing, then runs away again. Thunderbird is confused, but the Ducks are up. They both kick Thunderbird low and double whip, but Thunderbird springboards to QUEBRADA! Both Ducks go down and the fans fire up! And then Ladrona rolls Thunderbird up! TWO, the fans fire up as Ladrona dodges Thunderbird, and she WRECKS Fin with a dropkick!
Fin tumbles to the ramp, Ladrona dodges Thunderbird again, and she WRECKS Osphala with a dropkick! Osphala hits the commentary desk, Thunderbird runs up on Ladrona, slingshot ARM-DRAG! Ladrona tumbles, Link is up but Thunderbird dodges him. Thunderbird comes back, tilt-o-whirls and RANAS Link! Link tumbles to a corner, Thunderbird runs up, but Link stops the monkey flip to put Thunderbird up top. Thunderbird BOOTS Link away, then jumps up to the top rope! CROSSBODY! Down goes Link but Thunderbird bounces off the cover! Fin is back to run up and CHOP Thunderbird!
Fin CHOPS Thunderbird to the corner, whips him corner to corner, but then Osphala runs in to FLYING FOREARM Fin! Osphala covers Fin, TWO! Thunderbird runs up to DOUBLE SHOTGUN Fin and Osphala! Thunderbird covers Fin but both Ducks break it! The Ducks mug Thunderbird, then toss him out of the ring. Link is up, he blocks Rick’s superkick and hands it off to Mack. Link then HOOK SHOTS Rick! Mack SUPERKICKS Link! Link rebounds but Mack blocks his superkick! Rick SUPERKICKS Link! Link falls, Mack goes for the legs, Osphala rolls up Rick! Mack sees that, Link BOOTS Mack into Osphala’s cover!
The fans are thunderous as Link hurries to his feet. Link rushes Osphala but Osphala dodges. Osphala takes a swing but Link dodges! Osphala ducks the Hook Shot to URAKEN Link! Link ROLLING ELBOWS Osphala! The Ducks DOUBLE SUPERKICK Osphala and Link! Mack covers Link while Rick covers Osphala, referee Tiger Sahasrahla counts them both! TWO!! The fans are thunderous while The Ducks are furious! Ladrona gets on the apron, the Ducks DOUBLE SUPERKICK her down! Thunderbird gets up on the other side, Mack handsprings to headscissor and hold him in place for Rick’s DROPKICK!
Fin is up, The Ducks almost superkick him but hold back. There’s a bit of tension and the fans eat it up. Fin says hold on now, fellas, they’re Arrow Club. The Ducks look to each other, then look to Fin. Mack asks who Fin’s taking to Conundrum. Uh… R-Ruto… The Ducks look at each other again, and then they DOUBLE SUPERKICK Fin! Rick covers and Mack plays defense, TWO! Fin stays in this but The Ducks push Fin out of the ring. The Ducks find themselves alone in the ring, and they eye each other with suspicion. Well, now that they think of it… Who are The Ducks taking to Conundrum?
The Ducks decide that on the count of three, they’ll reveal who they’re taking. One, two, three! Rick says “You!” but Mack says “My girlfriend!” Rick says, “What?!” Mack says, “What?” Rick says Mack was supposed to choose Rick! They’re brothers for crying out loud! Mack says his girlfriend has always liked Conundrum, it’s her dream destination! Rick shoves Mack, Mack shoves Rick! Osphala dragon sleepers Rick, kicks Mack, and then reels Mack in, DOUBLE DDT COMBO! Cover on Rick, TWO! Cover on Mack, TWO! Osphala is frustrated, but then Thunderbird runs in! Thunderbird ducks Osphala’s lariat to handspring and NEURALIZER KICK!
Ladrona is back and she SHOVES Thunderbird out of the ring! Ladrona hurries to reel Osphala in for the PICKPOCKET CRADLE! TWO!! The Thief Girl almost stole one! Osphala kicks Ladrona, reels her in, SAND ROD!! Cover, The Ducks both break it! Rick HAMMERS away on Osphala, but Mack sneaks to cover Ladrona! Rick hears the count so he hurries to break it! Mack and Rick argue, and Mack says okay, okay, hold on. Mack agrees that if one of The Ducks win, they just take each other. Rick says, “Thank you!” They shake hands on it, but then Fin shoves Rick into Mack! They go to ropes, Mack tumbles out and Fin O’Conner Rolls Rick! TWO!!
Rick staggers to his feet, Fin kicks low and reels him in! DEPTH CHARGE! Cover, Mack breaks it! Mack drags Fin up and calls to Rick. Rick shakes his head and gets to his feet. Mack tells Rick to go to the apron. Rick does as told and Mack scoops Fin. But Thunderbird YANKS Rick down! Fin victory rolls Mack! TWO, Thunderbird trips Mack and drags him out! Thunderbird kicks Mack low to then snap suplex him onto Rick! Fin FLIES out onto Thunderbird! The fans are thunderous again and Fin puts Thunderbird in the ring. Thunderbird’s in a drop zone so Fin goes up a corner! COUP DE GRACE! But Ladrona then DROPKICK SENTON COMBOS!
Fin hits buckles, Ladrona covers Thunderbird, TWO! Ladrona almost snatches this one again, but then she drags Fin up from the corner to MONKEY FLIP! Ladrona rolls back, drags Fin around, and then drags him into a KOJI KLUTCH!! Or as she calls it, the DEN OF THIEVES!! Fin flails, but then someone rushes in from the crowd!? IT’S RUTO!! Ruto gets in the ring and she CLOBBERS Ladrona! Fin is free, Ruto drags Ladrona up and shouts, “I’m kicking your ass at HyruleMania! But for tonight…” Ruto SLAPS Ladrona, and then Fin dragon sleepers! BLOODY SUNDAY!! Cover, Fin wins!
Winner: Fin Balure, by pinfall (earns a meal for two at Conundrum)
The Zora Princess laughs as she and Fin stand over Ladrona. In one fell swoop, Ruto put the challenge out to Ladrona and helped Fin win their dinner date! Will these two suddenly become an HPW power couple? Or will Ladrona ruin this bad romance before it gets started?
My Thoughts:
Not quite under the wire like last time, but still later than I would’ve liked to finish this one. November just turned into a busy month with NJPW having one tag tournament after another. But that’s why I kept this Fyter Feast a little slim this time, with just three matches and then adding the promos after. I hope my attempt at Zelda’s awkwardness wasn’t itself awkward, but Link x Zelda is almost as strong a ship as Mario x Peach, it needed to be touched upon. Now let’s get ready for HyruleMania 5!
About Chairshot Radio Network
Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!
MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)
TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)
WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)
THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)
FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)
SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast
SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast
CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS
Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)
TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends
Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5
Classic POD is WAR
Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!
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Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
Entertainment
The 5×5 w/ Patrick O’Dowd: Lord of the Rings Characters
On this episode Patrick is joined by DJ from the Mindless Wrestling Pod to give you their five best and five worst characters from the Lord of the Rings Universe.
On this episode Patrick is joined by DJ from the Mindless Wrestling Pod to give you their five best and five worst characters from the Lord of the Rings Universe.
Powered by RedCircle
@WrestlngRealist @The MindlessPod @ChairshotMedia
prowrestlingtees.com/TheChairshot – TONS of Great designs…MAKES A GREAT GIFT!
About Chairshot Radio Network
Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!
MONDAY – Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)
TUESDAY – Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)
WEDNESDAY – The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)
THURSDAY – Keeping the news ridiculous… The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)
FRIDAY – DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)
SATURDAY – The Mindless Wrestling Podcast
SUNDAY – The Front and Center Sports Podcast
CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS
Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE’s PPV/PLE history)
TheChairshot.com PRESENTS…IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends
The 5×5 w/ Patrick O’Dowd
Classic POD is WAR
Chairshot Radio Network
Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts… Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!
Listen on your favorite platform!
iTunes | iHeart Radio | Google Play | Spotify
Listen, like, subscribe, and share!
About Chairshot Radio Network
Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!
MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)
TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)
WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling)
THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)
FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)
SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast
SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast
CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS
Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)
TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends
Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5
Classic POD is WAR
Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!
Powered by RedCircle
Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!