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Andrew’s Judgmental Album Reviews: Three Days Grace - Explosions (2022) | The Chairshot
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Andrew’s Judgmental Album Reviews: Three Days Grace – Explosions (2022)

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Not gonna lie, Fozzy was the layup last week on what to cover since it works with the theme of the website, but there’s been a few albums that have caught my interest. So picking one to cover, wasn’t what I would call easy.

I suppose this one won out, because I don’t know what to expect. Now I think most people in the Millennial age range know this band for I Hate Everything About You or Animal I Have Become. They got popular around the same time as Bullet for My Valentine, Breaking Benjamin and that era of metal. Now in 2013, the original lead singer Adam Gontier left the band, and at that point I considered them dead. I heard a few songs with the new guy, and was heavily unimpressed.

Though, even when the original singer was in the band, I can’t say I really know anything after One-X (2006). It’s safe to say they weren’t a favorite of mine. But who knows, the pandemic has reinvigorated a lot of older bands, maybe it’s time for Three Days Grace to stop sucking?!

Three Days Grace is: Brad Walst (bass), Matt Walst (lead vocals & rhythm guitar), Barry Stock (lead guitar), Neil Sanderson (drums & keys)

  • Artist: Three Days Grace
  • Album: Explosions (2022)
  • Label: RCA Records
  • Total Track Time: 37:51

So Called Life at least starts off with a more classic distorted groove and then the vocals kick in and they sound like Adema. I don’t know if that’s positive or negative yet. Lyrically I’m already a little annoyed with the inane lyrics most likely about the pandemic. Musically it’s at least passable, but the lyrical imagery is childish like the line of ‘wanting to ram a chainsaw through the wall’, the band members are in their 40s or pushing 40 and they’re writing lyrics like Monster chugging frat boys. I Am The Weapon is at least slightly more intricate lyrically since its about some form of psychological abuse. By some form I don’t know if there’s real layers or if its just a concept they found cool to write about. The problem is the worthless instrumentation. A bad drum beat, heavy keyboard effects and the boring parts of Animal I Have Become comprise this song. It’s safe to say, so far this album is shaping up to the be lowest I’ve ever rated.

Neurotic (feat Lukas Rossi) at least the guitar bridge between verses is kind of interesting. But again, this is written by 40 year olds with the lyrical capacity of 19 year olds. There’s a lyric about barely breathing, and that’s how I feel about this album so far. Damn this is bad. Lifetime oh my God this is terrible. With an open chord intro into the vocals and then very sparse guitar and keys it really is sad, in a shitty way. This is like every 00s nu-metal attempt a ballad, but all the bad parts, clichés and just vomit inducing trash. This was actually their second single for the album?! The song is the epitome of dying of cringe. A Scar is Born well okay it doesn’t turn me immediately off, that’s a change from the last few songs. Okay this is the pre-chorus; “Do you remember the moment your heart ripped wide open? The moment when you started to grieve? Believe”, this is hot garbage. Like the lyrical content is embarrassing. The musical quality isn’t much better but for the most part its just stereotypical new metal distortion with a possible classical sample behind things. But these lyrics make Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber sound like wordsmiths.

Souvenirs again, dude, these lyrics are awful. “There’s nothin’ more beautiful than a distant star, Proof of our ignorance, proof of how small we are (Small we are), Remember gettin’ high on the hood of my broke-down car, Remember how innocent we no longer are (We no longer are)”, these are teenage stoner thoughts and reminiscing…WHEN YOU’RE 40! These feel like words Matthew McConaughey would’ve said in Dazed and Confused. And this is only the halfway point of this pile of cow shit. No Tomorrow well okay, this at least is serviceable, I’m gonna try to ignore the lyrics moving forward unless they are asinine. But this could’ve been on Fuse in the early 00s and not felt out of place. So it took seven songs, but this is at least not pure chaff.

Redemption is this aptly named? ” I know sorry is not enough, To erase all the pain from when I messed up”, I know I’m not focusing on the lyrics, but given how awful this album is, I thought it was funny that these words feel like an apology for the wasted 20 minutes already. As a song though, this is uninspired. It’s a typical melancholic power ballad about suicide and forgiveness.  If someone needs to hear this song, good for them and glad it helped. But in the greater picture of music, this is worthless, goes nowhere and doesn’t say anything that 700 others songs in the same genre haven’t said better. Champion I hate this song already. It feels like they’re trying really hard to get a song into a WWE game, and the abrupt start and mentioning anything champion is laughable. Could this be like a Night of Champions theme song? Sure, but that also gets across the simplistically bland and boring nature of the song.

Chain of Abuse I’m going to bash my head into the desk. The lyrical tone is too bad to overlook again. You know, they are still trying to write to the 17 year old Hot Topic crowd, but the problem is, they are writing like they’re 17. Instead of actually coming from a place of expertise and maturity, the lyrics and instrumental tone sound more like a gaslighting boyfriend who’s trying to reassure a potential love interest with sweet nothings. The old “Everyone hates you and doubts you, but I don’t”. Those kind of lyrics aren’t positive, they are creepy, shallow and easily applied to manipulation. Bad song in every possible way. Someone To Talk To (feat Apocalyptica) I honestly didn’t know Apocalyptica was still together (the cool heavy metal cello band). What do you want me to say about this? At least having Apocalyptica in the feature implies it will be softer. But the song is useless.

Explosions, THANK GOD IT’S THE LAST SONG! I think it’s something that tries to sound deep about sitting on a rock in a universe of explosions and to have a little fun in the insignificant existence. BUT again it’s worded like a dyslexic 9 year old with half eaten crayons.

I don’t have enough metaphors to describe how much of an uninspired half-assed time capsule attempt of whatever garbage this was. If anyone over the age of 15 thinks this is good, please go to the ER and consult a doctor for head trauma. Two songs were under 3 minutes long, so I feel like even they wanted to get this album over with quickly.

This was the worst album I’ve covered thus far, and it’s not even close. Bad atmosphere, worse lyrics, conflicting musical tone, cliché song concepts and lyrics written by 40 year old man-children. Avoid this album like you avoid phone calls.

Final Judgment: 2.5/10

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Bandwagon Nerds #288: Disney In The Desert

Disney makes a controversial decision about where it is building its 7th theme park. Plus, loads of trailers, Thunderbolts* news, DCU updates, and more!

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Bandwagon Nerds Mario

Patrick returns to the show this week and leads the guys through a stacked Trailer Park, including the most recent previews of Old Guard 2, The Long Walk, Peacemaker Season 2, and Stick. Patrick also shares his thoughts with Dave and Tunney about Thunderbolts* and addresses some interesting rumors about what didn’t make it into the film. Meanwhile, Disney makes a very divisive decision about a 7th theme park, and President Trump’s trade war targets the film industry. It sounds crazy, but it’s true. If you are curious, we have answers, so make sure you tune in!

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Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu News Report! (5/9/25)

June will be electric!

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Prepare for the most electrifying even of the HPW calendar!

While the stage is set for Blood & Thunder 4 and the HPW World Trios Championships, HPW must also address the return of KAGE!

 

Thundra Plateau is ready.

Wrestling is Life, but life has its stormy weather. The rain is going to be hot in June, but will the reign continue through the Summer? The Dark Forces may have failed to take the Undisputed Triforce World Championship from Zelda, but they still have the World Trios Championships. Harlequin, Lupay & Glutko will step inside the double ring, double cage to defend their gold. On one side, Arrow Club’s special combination of Fin Balure, Torbevito & Bad Croc Scaly. On the other, a new combination of its own in Cia, Lana & Midna.

 

Speaking of Cia, Lana & Midna…

The three of them are together, dressed in workout attire, in what appears to be a dance studio. This is a collaboration stream for Midna and Lana as they’re both big presences on the internet, aka “influencers.” Lana and Midna wave and say hi, and they give introductions, including Cia, who is reluctant to be standing there. Cia doesn’t know why they need to do this. Lana says they have to improve their teamwork. They may have won against Los Taros Locos, but it was really sketchy there for a second. Midna adds that doing a dance routine together is great for their timing and coordination.

Cia says she didn’t mean that, she meant having to stream it! Oh, well obviously, combining Midna’s viewing audience with Lana’s, and HPW’s overall, this makes huge numbers! So? And huge money…! Cia raises her eyebrow and says, “Oh really?” The trio sets up, and Lana says obviously they first have to learn the steps. Midna brings up, “Wait, what song are we dancing to?” Oh, good point. Lana was thinking something from Lulu. Cia asks, “Lulu? From the Indigo-Go’s?” Midna says Lulu’s got a great solo album. Lana agrees! That’s so great that they like the same music. Cia isn’t as familiar with her solo stuff, so she’ll rely on them for this.

Lana suggests they go with Energetic Me. For one, it has the most energy, duh. And it still has a dance vibe, which is the whole point. Midna says she might’ve gone with Royal Discotheque or Ten Outta Ten, but she sees Lana’s point. Lana shows them the dance moves she has in mind. Left arm up, bent at the elbow, and the hand up against the side of the chest. Then they switch so the right arm goes up to mirror that position while the left hand goes back to the hip. Maybe add a little hip pop as that happens. Do that a couple times, and then turn to the right. This puts the left hand on the back of the hip, right hand on the back of the neck for a sexy pose.

Then you turn to flip it the other way, then do a 360 with a big neck whipping, hair flipping move. Then finish with feet apart and double V’s up by the eyes, maybe with a wink. Cia says, “Yeah, okay…” while Midna says, “I like it!” Midna says she’ll set up in the middle. Cia asks why Midna is in the middle, and Midna says it’s symmetry. She’s the tallest, Cia and Lana are about the same, it makes sense. Yeah, but it also means Midna is the center of attention. Well, that’s just coincidental. Lana says it doesn’t matter, the point is them doing it all in synch. Cia sighs and says, “Fine.” Midna is in the middle, Cia is on her right, and the music plays.

Left arm, right arm, left arm, right arm, pose to the right, pose to the left, 360 spin and neck whip, then double V. Midna nailed it, but Cia was lagging. Cia defends she was not, but Lana says it’s alright, they’ll just keep trying. They run through it a couple more times, they do tighten it up, and all three feel really good about how that went.

The Dark Forces are watching.

They aren’t impressed by the “little dance party.” Harlequin says the Faces of Evil are way better anyway. Especially with the classics like the Thriller dance and Macarena. Zant says, “The Macarena? Pfft, and people think I’m a dork…” Harlequin says, “Don’t you dare mock the Macarena!” Harlequin changes tabs on the computer and starts playing the song! After the introduction, he lifts his right arm up flat, then his left. Then he turns the right hand up, the left hand up, puts his right hand on his left shoulder, left hand on right shoulder, then moves right hand up behind his head, and then his left.

Now his arms crisscross, right hand on left hip and left hand on right hip, to then switch so right hand on right hip and left hand on left hip. And of course, he swivels his hips in one big circle to go with “HEY~ Macarena! AIGHT!” Zant rolls his eyes while Harlequin keeps going, jumping 90 degrees to his left. Ganon walks in, Ghirahim following behind, and he tells Harlequin to “turn that crap off.” Harlequin pouts but he does as told. Ganon seethes as he takes a seat in his big arm chair. “Needless to say… Wrestling is Life didn’t go how I’d hoped. What was Kage even doing there?! Did either of you have any idea he was going to betray us?!”

Zant and Ghirahim are a bit flustered. Zant isn’t even sure Kage was part of The Dark Forces at the time Ganon took ownership. He’d kinda gone rogue at some point, didn’t he? Ghirahim agrees, it didn’t seem like he was even aligned with Cia and the others. All the more reason for Kage to keep his nose out of Ganon’s business! If Kage cared about the Dark Forces, then he would’ve helped them fight back at HyruleMania, or any time since. Kage clearly just wants the title, same as Ganon, so he’s a dead man walking. Speaking of that… Where’s Kevin? He came back in April, why isn’t he here?

 

Somewhere dark and spooky…

Heavy footsteps can be heard echoing as Kevin Gibdo moves down the hallway. He speaks with a low, airy voice, “Majora… Your madness… spread like wildfire… You thought by setting me ablaze… I would crumble into ash… You were wrong! Instead, I have been purified…! Purged of flaws and weaknesses… I now come forth… as gold!” There’s a light at the end of the hall, and Kevin enters a grand hall, with treasure gleaming in the light. At the center is the sarcophagus. Kevin walks up to it, opens it, and then his burnt and tattered bandages fall away before he steps inside. The sarcophagus closes, then the eyes on it begin to glow… Then the entire thing glows!

The glowing becomes a shining light, and that shining becomes so bright that nothing can be seen. It is clear things between Kevin and Majora are not over. Will the Masked Monster even stand a chance once the Gibdo of All Gibdos is restored to full strength?

 

Back to the Dark Forces…

Shabonne says, “I’m sure Kevin is just fine doing whatever Gibdos do on their time off.” Tali says, “What matters is what I’m about to do to that tiny little weasel with the Goddess Championship. If The Dark Forces is gonna have all the gold, then I need to squash her like a bug and take that title off of whatever’s left!” Ganon nods and says he likes the initiative. Tali will start on her own Triple Crown as the Dark Forces will make Hyrule Pro-Wrestling their kingdom! The group cheers while raising a toast! And then Harlequin gets Glutko and Lupay to join in on the Macarena, to which Ganon groans and facepalms.

 

And so, the ThunderStruck card is set!

The double ring, double cage will rattle with Blood & Thunder as the HPW World Trios Championships are on the line! The Gerudo Ace looks to settle a grudge with the Hero’s Shadow! And now, the Million Rupee Championship and HPW Goddess Championships will also be on the line! Will the Dark Forces absolutely dominate the Summer? Be ready to endure the heat on Friday, June 20th!

About Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling) 

THURSDAY - Keeping the news ridiculous... The Oddity / Chairshot NFL (NFL)

FRIDAY - DWI Podcast (Drunk Wrestling Intellect)

SATURDAY - The Mindless Wrestling Podcast

SUNDAY - The Front and Center Sports Podcast 

CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5

Classic POD is WAR


Chairshot Radio Network Your home for the hardest hitting podcasts... Sports, Entertainment and Sports Entertainment!

All Shows On Demand


Powered by RedCircle


Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!
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