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Andrew’s IMPACT Wrestling Results & Match Ratings: 9.22.2022

The last IMPACT before Victory Road tomorrow! How does this GO Home wrap things up?

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Tonight should be interesting! We get a Ladder Match for the Digital Media title, a number one contender match for the Tag Team Titles and a little bit of a preview for the revolver match tomorrow.

Capped off with the contract signing, things will either get really interesting or tread water a bit. I guess there’s only one way to find out. So let’s start with a little bit of the Kane level of a creepy from Killer Kelly.

Ratings:

  • Digital Media Championship – Ladder Match: Bhupinder Gujjar vs Brian Myers (c): Myers retains – ** 3/4
  • Jordynne Grace vs Zicky Dice w/Johnny Swinger: Jordynne wins via Grace Driver – Squash
  • 5 Way X Division Match: Mia Yim vs Black Taurus vs Laredo Kid vs Trey Miguel vs Alex Zayne: Taurus wins via Destination Hell Hole – ***
  • Open Challenge Street Fight: Heath vs PCO: Heath wins via Wake Up Call – ** 1/2
  • Aussie Open vs Motor City Machine Guns: MCMG win via Skull and Bones – *** 1/4

Results:

Digital Media Championship – Ladder Match: Bhupinder Gujjar vs Brian Myers (c)

Myers decides to try to lead by talking before Gujjar just goes after him with heavy strikes, Samoan Drop and some solid offense. Gujjar sets up for the moron perched Spear and Myers counters it with a Jumping Knee. A little jockeying back and forth for a ladder, but Myers keeps momentum, hits a Backdrop on the apron and sets up the first ladder in the middle.

Gujjar slides in, lays in some heavy forearms, sweeps his leg and catches the falling Myers with a Cutter. Moron Perched Spear again…this time it connects with Myers bouncing off the ladder and powdering out. It takes him a minute, but Gujjar tries to climb the ladder and Myers rushes in to tip over the ladder sending him and ladder bouncing off the ropes. Myers drops the ladder on Gujjar’s head and sets up the ladder in the corner. Gujjar plays the roll on the pinball and starts careening off of ladders and corners.

Ahh okay nonsense spots begin! Myers grabs a second ladder, Gujjar sets up the original ladder and we have the stupid “slug it out while on two different ladders” spot. Myers gets knocked down, Gujjar can’t take advantage and Myers recovers almost immediately for an elevated Backdrop Driver. So…purely useless and just done for a spot. Third ladder leaned against the steps, little bit of a fight, and then Myers lands the Kevin Nash style Jacknife Powerbomb on the third ladder.

They stumble back in, Gujjar hits a desperation Superkick, tries to climb the ladder but Myers hits the Uppercut to the nuts and then tapes Gujjar’s leg to the ladder. So instead of fighting Myers as he was climbing, Gujjar just helplessly struggles to try and get his leg out while Myers grabs his title.

The finish was clever, but stupid and we saw some dumb spots for the sake of spots; but it wasn’t awful, especially given Gujjar’s inexperience. 

Jordynne Grace vs Zicky Dice w/Johnny Swinger

This got set up last week since Zicky and Swinger were setting up the classic porn pizza delivery and Zicky’s mouth got him in trouble. So he gets dominated by Jordynne and they return to the dungeon.

Yeah all of this is tags on Pornhub, a lot like Rhea & Dom Mysterio.

5 Way X Division Match: Mia Yim vs Black Taurus vs Laredo Kid vs Trey Miguel vs Alex Zayne

While I’m generally disinterested in most of the wrestlers here, I do enjoy Mia’s theme song. All four guys go after each other so Mia waits, works with Alex and Trey for a moment and then it breaks down. Trey and Alex go into the leg pick, counter style that is very video game, and very boring. Mia waits for them to pause and pose and hits a Double Dropkick.

Black Taurus slides in to interrupt Mia’s offense and just headbutts her into next week. So Lucha time when Laredo kid pop up. Frankensteiner to the outside for Laredo, Alex and Trey decide to fly together to set up the pile spot for Mia’s Senton. Again, basic indy Cruiser stuff that is kinda lame, boring and predictable.

Now is the point when everyone gets some form of offense in and there’s a lot of flashy moves and then they all fall down. Mia does land a Powerbomb on Alex Zayne which is unexpected. Protecc Ya Neck from Mia, but Laredo Kid and Trey intercept. Taurus eats Trey for a snack, but Laredo Kid lands a Superkick causing the bull to powder. Laredo tries the Corkscrew Moonsault Press, and crashes and burns. Cinnamon Twist from Zayne catches knees. Destination Hell Hole from Black Taurus and the bull wins!

I’ve learned because most of the Western cruisers have literally no personality or its always the same “high flying daredevil” type, these matches are boring and paint by numbers. Mia’s involvement helps, the Lucha element is always volatile and tomorrow’s Revolver match has Frankie Kazarian, so at least there’s reasons to care. 

I believe in Joe Hendry. 

Open Challenge Street Fight: Heath vs PCO

PCO comes down, then Honor No More cuts off his entrance and Eddie tells PCO this is not his fight. Gets in his face, pulls the “you belong to me” line while Heath is trying to goad the French Canadian Frankenstein. PCO pushes through Honor No More and comes down to start the match. 

Heath hits the Plancha immediately, but Vincent stuck around, so Heath is immediately out numbered. Going up the ramp and then outside to a staging area, we get a very awkward and very dark set up for some kind of spot off a stage.

There we go, after a DDT from Heath onto the stage, the flings PCO into a few rows of nicely place chairs. So while I don’t like the lightning, pacing or spot selection; it’s what one expects with PCO and hardcore rules. Honor No More walk out while PCO recovers and then we see Josh Alexander and Rich Swann hit the ring to even up the odds a little.

Josh and Rich get most of them, focus on Eddie Edwards but Vincent tries to take advantage of the bedlam. Chairshot, Orange Sunshine attempt, but Heath counters and hits a Wake Up Call. PCO rises from the chairs like the Shredder from Teenager Mutant Ninja Turtles, and while draped in chairs, starts throwing them at Heath. Heath charges once PCO gets in, eats a Chokeslam. PCO piles up the chairs, puts on the glove, Mandible Claw onto the pile of chairs.

PCO-SAULT crashes and burns on all the chairs. Wake Up Call onto the pile and Heath wins!

For all of the opening jawing, this was fairly paint by numbers.

Aussie Open vs Motor City Machine Guns

Shelley starts off against Fletcher. Fletcher tries to impose his height, but Shelley hits him with multiple arm breakers, tag, quick spots and Sabin even takes a shot at the arm. Davis gets tagged in as per the usual Japanese tag openings. Very rarely do we see the opening salvo be a lot of isolation, everyone usually gets a chance to play before isolations tactics get applied.

Davis rattles Sabin a little with a Backhand Chop, but a blind tag, tandem Guns classic offense levels Davis, stops Fletcher’s interference and they play a little rope a dope. Stereo apron attacks from the Guns and we get to see that MCMG swagger.

Davis sandwiches Shelley, Fletcher gets cute, we see both teams try to help save one another in locomotion corner spots before Aussie Open both catch the smaller guns and give them the old Squisher before the commercial break. The Aussie’s maintaining control as we come back to a Delayed Vertical Suplex, VERY Delayed. Davis tries a Senton but Shelley rolls away and finally looks for daylight. Fletcher goes for the block but Sabin gets in anyway.

Hot tag flurry from Sabin with a Missile Dropkick, PK and a big High Fly Flow for 2. Shelley slips in for high impact tandem offense, Flatliner/Missile Dropkick combo, again, only 2. Fletcher hits a desperation Driver, Tandem Gutbuster/Cutter from Aussie for 2. Assisted Iconoclasm, but also only 2. Both teams have hit bigger tandem moves, trying to impose their tag superiority.

Corealis attempt, but Sabin fights out with a Tornado DDT. High Speed Dirt, Double Yakuza in the corner, Skull and Bones…for the win!

Ahh we’ve got the contract signing main event, or in this regard; the “Hold Harmless” agreement. Sami shows up a little late with smarmy things to say, pulls out a pen wrapped in barbed wire, which is just TOO gimmicky and stupid. There’s a fine line between ridiculous parody amusement and going to far to the point of stupid. This is stupid, then we get a big brawl. 

Overall Score: 6/10

Last few episodes have been a bit uninspired, with mediocre matches and no real story to sink my teeth in to. The draw of the big triple threat is just the violence, but they’ve done so many hardcore matches in the last 3 or 4 years, it’s a little old. That’s not to say I don’t enjoy Moose, Sami and Maclin on their own; this story has just dragged a bit. Also going from No DQ to Clockwork House of Fun, to Barbed Wire Massacre…it’s all the same and redundant.

Myers’ match felt like it was almost good, which I blame more on Gujjar’s vanilla personality and a few dumb spots. X Division style isn’t what it used to be. If I wanted to watch pointless flips and piles of people waiting for spots I’d go to more Indies, or watch AEW.

For people who only watch intermittently, this did explain how we get to the Victory Road card pretty well. But I’m just uninterested in the last few weeks is all. It’s kinda bad when the thing I popped the most for was Joe Hendry.

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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (1/17/25)

Will Tiffy Time be cut short?

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DING DONG, Hello, Tiffany!

Tiffanny Stratton just won the WWE Women’s Championship but she’s already defending it against Bayley! Will the Role Model be back on top?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Bianca Belair & Naomi VS Nia Jax & Candice LeRae; Bianca & Naomi win.
  • Jimmy Uso VS Carmelo Hayes; wins.
  • Motor City Machine Guns VS Los Garza w/ Legado Del Fantasma; win.
  • Piper Niven w/ Chelsea Green VS B-Fab w/ Mia Yim; wins.
  • Rey Mysterio VS Kevin Owens; wins.
  • WWE Women’s Championship: Tiffany Stratton VS Bayley; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

Rey Mysterio is here!

San Diego fires up for the hometown hero as he makes his entrance! The King of Lucha high-fives fans along the ramp, and hugs his wife and daughter, before stepping in the ring. Rey grabs himself a mic, the fans chant “619! 619!” and he smiles. Rey tells San Diego, “Bien venidos, welcome to Friday Night SmackDown! This is the home of the 6! 1! 9!” The fans cheer, and Rey says no cap, it feels great to be back home in front of his people, his Raza, his city, and his familia. Rey requested to be here tonight because he couldn’t think of a better place to reminisce as he gets ready to do the impossible once again.

Rey officially declares for the 2025 Royal Rumble! The arena is shaking hearing that! Rey wants to look back: 2006, he entered the Rumble at #2, outlasted 28 other superstars, and became the Royal Rumble winner! And it didn’t end there. he went on to main event WrestleMania, and he became the WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION! Now, Rey won’t lie, he will be realistic. The competition is heavy this year: Drew McIntyre, who fans boo. CM Punk, who fans cheer; Seth Rollins, who fans are torn on; Roman Reigns, who fans cheer; John Cena, who fans also cheer. It will be tough, but let’s remember back to when he won.

It was 2006, and Rey did it for a friend we all know very well. The fans chant for “EDDIE! EDDIE!” But wait! Kevin Owens makes his way out here! The Prizefighter, still holding onto the winged eagle title belt, showing off his new shirt: The Canadian Dream, Son of a Security System Technician. Kevin has a mic, too, and while fans boo, he tells Rey, “Lemme start off by saying I’m very sorry for coming out here and interrupting you> I mean it, okay? But I had to come out here. Because I heard you just now talking about how you were gonna win the Royal Rumble.

“And Rey, I mean this from the bottom of my heart. It’s never been a secret. There’s a lot of people in this industry that I respect quite a bit, but very few I respect as much as I respect you. In fact, I’ll even go so far as saying there’s nobody in this industry that I respect as much as I respect you.” The fans do cheer that, and Kevin says he has had an incredible career, he’s accomplished things he’s dreamed of since he was a kid. He has main evented WrestleMania with Steve Austin. He won the tag team titles with his then best friend, Sami Zayn. He won countless other tiles, and now he gets to stand here with THIS title!

The fans boo but Kevin says this is the title that as a kid, he saw all his idols win. This is the title he dreamed of winning, and now he stands here as the TRUE, RIGHTFUL WWE Champion! The fans boo again but Kevin says there is one thing left for him to accomplish so that he can truly feel his career is complete. And that is to step into the ring and have a 1v1 match with the legendary Rey Mysterio. The fans like that idea, and Kevin says face to face, man to man, he hopes Rey wins the Rumble! Kevin will root for Rey with everything he has! Rey can and will beat “all those other idiots.”

But just promise Kevin one thing. After Rey wins the Rumble, promise that Kevin is the champion he picks for WrestleMania so that Kevin can have his dream match. Rey takes a moment, and he tells Kevin that we all know Rey loves competition. But… Kevin’s not the champion. The fans cheer that! Rey means that with all due respect, but Cody Rhodes is the champion. But, but, here’s this. If Rey wins the Rumble, and if Kevin wins the title, then yes, Rey will gladly face him for the title. Kevin takes a moment, and repeats, “I’m not the champion? I AM THE CHAMPION! This is my title! I earned it! I deserve it!”

The fans boo but Kevin says Cody has Rey brainwashed, too! Does Rey have bleached blonde hair under that mask? Is it seeping into his brain? Rey wants Kevin to calm down. What’s going on? Drew McIntyre, now Kevin, he’s acting so delusional! It’s reminding him of Dominik. Oh…! Kevin swings on Rey! Rey dodges to fire hands in return! They brawl, Kevin shoves Rey but Rey dropkicks the legs! Kevin is on the ropes, but he bails out before the 619! The fans boo but Kevin is the one offended. Will Kevin be able to let this go so he can focus on Cody?

 

Bianca Belair meets up with Naomi backstage.

Bianca asks if Naomi finished with Nick Aldis. She did. Any updates? No! No lead on Jade’s attacker. Nothing? Wow. But that’s okay, they’ll keep pushing forward. They will handle Nia & Candice, but Bianca just wants to make sure they’re good after the mishap last week. It wasn’t on Bianca, that was Candice. Naomi knows that. Plus, they have to focus. It may not be Tiffany, but they can at least get some lick back on Candice & Nia. And they still have their gold! Bianca says that’s true. Ready to go? Naomi says maybe Bianca should wrap her up. That way, last week won’t happen again. Bianca agrees, and she hurries to wrap the braid into a bun.

Now they’re good. The StrongEST Glow heads out, will they be able to get past the Irresistible Force & Poison Pixie? Or will they soon be owing some golden tickets to the Queen of the Ring and her new sidekick?

 

Nick Aldis talks with Rey Mysterio.

After what we saw with Kevin, and since they are in San Diego, we have to have Rey on the card. Rey VS KO happens 1v1! Rey thanks Aldis and promises to handle business. And then Cody Rhodes walks in! The American Nightmare tells Rey he saw what happened while he was going through his physical. Cody says he would’ve been out there to help, but Rey says it’s nota big deal. It is handled, Rey VS Kevin is happening. Cody just needs to heal up. Rey can handle his problems, and will leave something for Cody at the Royal Rumble. Rey fist bumps and heads out. Aldis tells Cody that Rey has a point, Cody needs to be careful.

That said, what’d the doctors have to say? Cody says he has a clean bill of health, fully cleared, and Aldis can read the report himself. Aldis says he trusts Cody, he just doesn’t know if that’s good news. There is a lot of time between now and the Rumble, and even more so to WrestleMania. But with that in mind, Aldis has an addendum to the ladder match. Cody needs to sign it, as does Kevin, because they cannot have what happened at Saturday Night’s Main Event happen ever again. Cody asks if Kevin’s signed it yet. Kevin was Aldis’ next stop. Then Cody will sign it once Kevin has. Cody heads out, will Aldis be able to get what he wants out of this?

 

Bianca Belair & Naomi VS Nia Jax & Candice LeRae!

SmackDown returns as Bianca & Naomi make their entrances. The teams sort out and Nia steps to Bianca, only to CLOBBER Naomi! Candice joins in to mug Bianca, but the fans boo. The ref reprimands, Candice backs off, and Nia soaks up the heat. Naomi throws Bianca down, talks more trash, then HEADBUTTS Bianca down. Nia drags Bianca up, tags Candice, but Bianca fights back. Nia CLUBS Bianca, Candice wrenches, but Bianca runs Candice over! And runs her over again! Bianca suplexes, holds Candice up, then SLAMS her down! The fans fire up as Bianca kips up, and she runs up to RAM Candice!

Bianca then climbs to rain down fists! The fans count along, Bianca goes all the way to TEN! Nia storms in, but Bianca flips up and over! Nia runs into Candice, then turns around into Bianca’s DROPKICK! Bianca runs up but Candice BOOTS her! Candice goes up, but Bianca ROCKS her! Bianca military presses Candice, and she THRWOS her out onto Nia! Nia & Candice fall, the fans fire up, and SmackDown goes picture in picture.

Bianca flexes, then waits on Nia & Candice. Bianca’s braid has unrolled so Bianca swings it to rally the fans. Bianca then goes out to fetch Candice, shoves her into the ring, but Nia anchors Bianca’s feet! Candice DROPKICKS Candice down! Cover, TWO! Candice CLUBS away on Bianca, then scuffs her. Candice stalks Bianca to a corner, KNEES her down, then steps on her to DOUBLE STOMP! Tag to Nia, and Nia stalks Bianca. Nia makes Bianca smile with fishhooks, then HIP DROPS her down! Nia swings the braid around to mock Bianca, and even intimidate the ref. Bianca gets her braid free to SMACK away on Nia!

Bianca LASHES Nia more, backing her down, then she runs. Bianca SHOTGUNS Nia, Nia rebounds, but Bianca avoids the elbow drop! Cover, ONE!! Nia CLOBBERS Bianca at the ropes! Nia argues with the ref, taunts Naomi, then soaks up the heat. Tag to Candice and Candice kicks Bianca around. Candice SMACKS Bianca off the apron, pushes her in, then CLOBBERS her! Cover, TWO! Candice CLOBBERS Bianca again, then digs her knee in for a half Bow ‘n’ Arrow stretch! Bianca endures, fights around, reaches back, and she pulls Candice’s hair! Bianca and Candice fire forearms, but Candice DECKS Bianca! Cover, TWO!

Candice is frustrated but she KNEES Bianca in the side. Candice stomps Bianca more, KNEES her down, then has her on the ropes. The ref counts but Candice bends Bianca back! Candice lets go at 4, SmackDown returns to single picture,. and Candice brings Bianca up. Bianca rolls Candice up, TWO! Candice ENZIGIRIS Bianca down! Candice hurries to a corner and goes up, to then CROSSBODY! But Bianca rolls through! The fans fire up as Bianca lifts, but Candice slips free! Candice pulls the braid! Bianca uses that to reel Candice in for an ELBOW! But Candice grabs the braid to throw Bianca down! Both women are down and the fans fire up!

Bianca and Candice crawl, Candice goes to Bianca! STEP-UP- NO! Bianca avoids the senton! But Nia YANKS Naomi down from the outside! The fans boo but Nia sends Naomi into barriers! Candice stands Bianca up, but Bianca rolls her again! TWO, and Candice SUPERKICKS Bianca down! Candice hurries to the corner, tag to Nia. Nia storms up on Bianca, mockingly reaching out to Naomi, and then CLUBS Bianca! Nia whips, LARIATS, and SAMOAN DROPS! Bianca sputters and goes to the corner, but Nia runs up! Bianca BOOTS Nia first! Bianca ELBOWS Candice, dodges Nia, then RAMS into her! Candice grabs the braid!

Bianca whips Candice into the POST! Bianca climbs, but Nia ROCKS her! Nia climbs up after Bianca, fireman’s carries, but Bianca CLUBS away! Bianca is safe, she shoves Nia away, then CROSSBODIES! Both women are down and the fans fire up! Naomi returns! Bianca crawls, hot tag to Naomi! The fans fire up as Naomi ROUNDHOUSES Nia away, then slingshots for the FACEBUSTER! Cover, TWO! Nia still has a lot left in the tank but Naomi HAMMERS away on her! Nia shoves Naomi away, runs up, but Naomi dodges! Nia POSTS herself, falls back, and Naomi goes up! SPLIT-LEG MOONSAULT! Cover, Candice breaks it!

Naomi ENZIGIRIS Candice for it! Tag to Bianca and the tag champs go after Nia. Nia fights back, SAMOAN DROP for Naomi! The fans boo but Nia looms over Bianca. Nia runs, Candice sneaks a tag, and Bianca dodges! Bianca SPEARS Nia! Bianca runs, handsprings, but Candice DROPKICKS her down! STEP-UP SENTON! Nia rises, she adds a SENTON of her own! Candice covers, TWO!! Bianca survives and the fans fire up! Candice can’t believe it, but San Diego declares, “This is Awesome!” Candice storms around, snarls, then runs up at Bianca. Bianca ALLEY-OOPS her onto buckles! Then SPINEBUSTERS her down!

Bianca runs, handsprings, and MOONSAULTS! But Nia runs up! Bianca dodges, LEG DROP hits Candice!! Nia panics, runs up on Bianca, but Bianca tosses her out! LARIAT and down goes Bianca! Naomi tags for the BUBBA BOMB! Gedo clutch, Naomi & Bianca win!

Winners: Bianca Belair & Naomi, by pinfall

The tag champs find a way to survive, but now they’ll have to meet NXT’s Meta Four on January 28th! NXT goes on the road to Atlanta, Georgia, will Lash Legend & Jakara Jackson be bringing the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships home as souvenirs? Or will they only feel the StrongEST Glow?

 

Pregame interview with Bayley.

Byron Saxton walked through an empty Pechanga Arena with The Role Model before the show, and noted how last week, Bayley won the Fatal 4 Way #1 Contender’s match. Now, we’re in San Diego, with a sold out crowd as Bayley challenges Tiffany Stratton for the title. What does this match mean to her? Well, sold out here in her home state, that is what dreams are made of. We all dream about being in the main event and fighting for a championship. This is a huge night for her. Thinking on her career, this time last year, she won the 2024 Royal Rumble and earned a guaranteed championship opportunity.

Bayley would challenge former friend, Iyo Sky, someone she respects so much in this business. That felt like the peak of Bayley’s career, where she was going to do something different and change the world. To be honest, she isn’t sure she fulfilled her potential during that reign. Yes, she defended the title, took it all over the world, but she always felt she was just winning by the skin of her teeth. She’s a perfectionist, she loves wrestling so much. And so, that reign was certainly cut short when Tiffany helped Nia take that title from Bayley. Tonight is a big night for her.

Then how does tonight feel different from past opportunities in regaining the title? Well, we’ve seen what Tiffany has done this past year, and she just showed she’s willing to turn on her friends to get to the “Tiffy Top,” as she puts it. Part of Bayley respects her, but the other part wants to beat Tiffy that much more. Tonight, it’s personal. Byron wishes Bayley luck and they shake hands. Will this be a big first defense for Tiffy? Or will it be a big comeback for the former Grand Slam Champion?

 

Mia Yim talks with B-Fab backstage.

Michin just knows she would’ve had Chelsea Green if not for Piper Niven. They always gotta use numbers! B-Fab knows how they do. That US Championship should’ve been Mia’s! B-Fab tells Mia to keep her head up, because she’ll get another shot to take down sleazy- Piper Niven walks in being all Secret Service. Piper says the room is clear, no threats to the champion. Chelsea walks in, thanks “Spicy Service,” and says B-Fab and “Mimi” should stand up and properly congratulate her as the only woman to successfully defend this title. B-Fab says Chelsea please. We all know that if it wasn’t for Piper the Mall Cop, Chelsea would not be champion.

Piper steps up and tells B-Fab that if she takes another step closer, it’ll be her last. If that’s how Piper wants to play it, then how about this? B-Fab will talk with Aldis, then she and Piper can handle their problem tonight. Then after Piper, Chelsea better watch her back. Mia says that is a threat. Mia follows B-Fab, Chelsea tells Piper to neutralize B-Fab. Piper agrees. But just how will this shake out when Piper’s the one in action?

 

Jimmy Uso heads to gorilla.

“San Diego! The goal tonight is to make sure Carmelo stays missing. Hey, ya boi got something to prove! Hey, I’m proud of The Yeet Man. My brother got his own title match coming up, and it’s time to go get mine. But it starts tonight with Carmelo. Hey yo, Uce, between me and you, Big Jim is Him!” Jimmy heads out to the ring, will he prove he’s just as worthy of golden opportunities?

Jimmy Uso VS Carmelo Hayes!

SmackDown returns as Melo makes his entrance. Melo has a mic to tell Big Jim that he wants to get this straight. Roman’s in the Rumble, Jey’s got a world title match, and what’s Jimmy got? It just seems like Jimmy is living in the shadow of his brother who is living in the shadow of Roman Reigns. But for some reason, Jimmy’s taking shots at H1M? Then here’s a serious question: How can Jimmy take shots when he’s sitting on the bench? Do Melo a favor: Lace up those shoes real tight, Unc, because you’re about to see that Melo Don’t Miss. But then Jimmy TOSSES Melo into the ring! Jimmy borrows those sunglasses, then he fires haymakers!

The fans fire up as Jimmy pops, locks ‘n’ ROCKS Melo! Jimmy whips, but Melo avoids the superkick! Melo bails out, the fans boo, and Jimmy grins. Jimmy hurries after Melo but Melo HOTSHOTS Jimmy down! Melo storms in to CLOBBER Jimmy, and he stomps away at the ropes! The ref counts, teh fans boo, but Melo lets off at 4. Melo soaks up the heat, then he CHOPS Jimmy against ropes. Melo stalks Jimmy, CHOPS Jimmy in a corner, then brings him around for haymakers. Melo whips, Jimmy reverses, QUICK DRAW! Melo is in a corner, and the fans join Jimmy in chanting, “UCE! OH!” Jimmy runs, but Melo dodges the hip attack!

Melo comes back, but Jimmy puts him on the apron. Jimmy UPPERCUTS Melo, Melo sputters, and Jimmy goes out to join him. Jimmy suplexes Melo onto the apron! Melo writhes, Jimmy refreshes the count, and then Jimmy builds speed! Jimmy DIVES, and Melo is sent into the desk! The fans fire up for Jimmy while SmackDown goes to break.

 

About Chairshot Radio Network

Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

 MONDAY - Bandwagon Nerds (entertainment & popular culture)

TUESDAY - Musical Chairs (music) / Hockey Talk (NHL)

WEDNESDAY - The Greg DeMarco Show (wrestling) 

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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 1.16.25

The Go Home for Genesis this Sunday! Let’s see what happens!

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So Genesis is Sunday, followed by next week’s Live Episode of iMPACT! Let’s see exactly how we get to Genesis and not to bury the lead, the fact the WWE/TNA partnership was extended for a few years is very big news for TNA. More visibility for a nostalgic brand and the younger NXT wrestlers get more opportunities with potential sprinkles of a big name here or there (yes I only really mean AJ Styles, but that’s what we all want to see one more time).

Let’s get to the show and see if it’s a Go Home worth anything.

Ratings:

  • Trent Seven vs Leon Slater: Slater wins via Swanton 450 – *
  • Fir$t Cla$$ vs Maniac Marines (Eric Young & Steve Maclin): EY wins via Macho Elbow – ** 3/4
  • Laredo Kid vs Jake Something: Jakes wins via Avalanche Something Bomb – **
  • The Hardys vs Ohio Versus Frankenstein (Sami Callihan & PCO): Hardys win via Crouton Bomb – ***

 

Results:

Trent Seven vs Leon Slater

British on British violence! I just appreciate that Trent’s theme is a down tuned remix of Seven Nation Army. 

A little back and forth until Slater hits a Reverse Gamengiri, Trent tries to climb back to the apron after the powder, eats a Shotgun Kick. Trent dodges the dive, and Suplexes Leon down the steps at Center Stage. I feel like Slater over sold the spot, but I suppose using your surroundings is always interesting. Leon slides in at 9.5, Trent gets a little cocky and Leon hits two Flash Cradles for near falls, as Trent is reeling from the quick pinfall attempts he eats another Shotgun Kick for a near fall. Trent sells to the corner, eats a Jumping Bootwash, Leon perches Trent, goes for possibly a Spanish Fly but Trent turns it into an Avalanche Flowsion for two!

Bop and Bang, 7 Star Lariat, Piledriver with flourish and…still a two. Birminghammer attempt but Slater flips out of it, Crucifix pinfall for two, Uppercut by Trent and Birminghammer is hit! But Slater…kicks…out? He sells a Suplex where he slides down steps like death, but eats huge signature and finishing moves and kicks out. The psychology in this match is non-existent. Trent does the Finger Break, Leon sells away, hits another Shotgun Kick and Trent powders. X Plex gets reversed into a DDT from Slater. Trent powders off the Ramp, Leon goes to the entrance way runs and jumps off the ramp, then hits the Swanton 450.

Completely stupid match with spots that make no sense. All sizzle no steak, so dumb my IQ dropped 5 points.

The Elegance Clique have a “Pre-Launch Championship Celebration”. Tom Hannifan hates it, the crowd hates it, and the Personal Concierge uncovers a cardboard cut out with a Knockouts Title around their waists…and they are size accurate. Heather is like a My Size Barbie. Ash gives a very cringey speech where she thanks everyone except Heather, the Concierge passes the mic to Heather, Spitfire interrupts of course, and at least Dani cuts the promo to start so it’s tolerable. Yeah this is painfully bad cringe, as much as I didn’t mind the Ash gimmick to start with, this is lame. The only thing saving the segment is the crowd is hot for the the Elegance Clique getting their stuff ruined. So it was lame, but the crowd was into it and Ash sold the destruction of cardboard cut outs like Spitfire just murdered her puppy. 

Well the first 40 minutes of this show are making me wish for a stroke instead of watching this. So hopefully it picks up somewhere. 

Fir$t Cla$$ vs Maniac Marines (Eric Young & Steve Maclin)

KC flips out of two of EY’s Back Body Drops and does his “First Class” taunt, so EY just slaps him upside the head and tags in Maclin to start beating on Navarro. I do really like KC’s work. He’s like WWE Lio Rush, but likable and talented. Maclin is beating the hell out of KC though, Lariats him out, goes for the SCUD, but AJ low bridges so Maclin crashes to the outside, KC hits the Tope con Hilo with blind tag so AJ is now legal and they start working over Maclin in the corner. Tennessee Whiskey, and there does seem to be a few First Class fans in the crowd.

Navarro is back in for the 305, quick tags though to keep Maclin eating offense. Splash into Big Boot into Assisted Splash while AJ leans on Maclin literally. KC starts picking on kids in the crowd near Judd Normand, he shoves the actor, the actor shoves him back and AJ comes over to mad dog the actor. Maclin takes advantage of the distraction and drops AJ on the way back in with an Olympic Slam, tags in EY and EY comes out hot. KC tags in, EY levels KC and they start messing around in the corner, AJ tries to break it up but eats a Busaiku Knee from Maclin and then a SCUD. EY manages to throw KC off the turnbuckle and then hit the Macho Elbow for the win.

After the match Eddie, Lish and Brian Myers stand at the entrance way to send a message but not cause any real chaos. 

Josh Alexander and his two bitch boys come out to cut a promo on Santana or something. I am about as interested in this as I am in Norwegian Dog Sledding. Josh trying to say Santana is too hurt to go at Genesis when we all know this was filmed the same time like a month ago. You really can’t do doofus attempts a story when you’re promoting the first live episode in nearly a decade or something for next week. At least the match should be good because this build is lame, the jabronis are useless, “Bald Ass Head” is the big insult…sheeeesh. 

Laredo Kid vs Jake Something

Well…someone has to win this match, so there’s that.

Nothing special start until Jake comes off the ropes and runs over Laredo sending him flying over the ropes onto the ramp. Jake panders to the crowd, Laredo tries to get something going but Jake steps on his foot to stop any Lucha things, and mollywops him. Jake runs him corner to corner until Laredo moves, strings a few moves together, tries to fly and then gets knocked out of the sky with a Forearm. Only a two count for Jake, but Laredo is definitely doing his best impression of a pinata so far in the match. Laredo gets a desperation Satellite DDT, misses his big attempt, but Jake misses the Spear in the corner, La Magistral gets a 2, a few bad spots from Laredo where it looks like he missed a Satellite Facebuster and sloppy Essex or Canadian Destroyer. Laredo goes to the top, Jake bear paw slap, goes up top and Avalanche Something Bomb for the win.

The Hardys vs Ohio Versus Frankenstein (Sami Callihan & PCO)

Before the Hardys intro, the 23 thing flashes a few times again. So at least they didn’t forget that.

Sami starts with Jeff and gets in a few early shots and goads Jeff with Hardys taunts, then all four get in, throw hands and we go to commercial. We come back from commercial to Matt Delete Turnbuckling Sami, and then Poetry In Motion the classic way! A few quick tags, but Sami eventually knocks down Matt, tags in PCO, Matt’s moves aren’t very effective, Jeff throws himself in too and they get their asses beat by PCO. PCO tags in Sami, Sami slaps around Matt, drags his face across the ropes, tags PCO back in and uses PCO as a battering ram into Matt’s chest. PCO keeps Matt in their corner, tags back in Sami, some simple tandem work and a short 2 count for Sami. Sami calls PCO back in and they’re formulating a tag move, they try the Double Back Drop, but Matt turns it into a Double DDT instead.

Jeff tries to fight them both off, Sami grabs Jeff, PCO goes for the Lariat, malfunction at the junction, Whisper in the Wind mostly hits PCO so Jeff Splashes Sami. Twist of Hate, Twist of Fate, Swanton Bomb from Jeff and the Hardy Boys win!

Before the obligatory contract signing on the Go Home before a PPV, Jordynne walks over to the announce table with the contract for her match with Tessa. Says she’ll leave it with them so she can’t miss it, but hey, “if she doesn’t show up at Genesis it wouldn’t be the first time”. That’s funny. 

Joe starts the promo saying he has to win, but its on him to take the title from Nic. There’s an intensity, so it’s not all cornball jokes and shenanigans. That’s kinda nice to start with. Nic takes the babyface angle of “you’re not wrong but I don’t think you’re ready yet kid”. Then he plays the JBL clip from Bound for Glory. Nic tries to use the video to clear his name because Ryan got attacked too. Joe is about to poke a hole in the defense but then Hollywood Abyss Mokuba shows up. “MY BROTHER SETO” Ryan interferes, Nic tries to stop the stupidity but Ryan plows through is about to eat a Standing Ovation but Nic Superkicks Joe to save Mokuba. Nic does stand there as the crowd chants “kick your brother”, but Nic doesn’t pull the trigger but you can tell he’s contemplating. 

OH! Sexy Tessy shows up, signs the contract but Jordynne was waiting for her and leaves Tessa laying with a Grace Driver and solid intensity. Okay most of the show was kinda mid but the ending was pretty solid.

Overall Score: 6.25/10

As I said at the very end, most of this show was mid…or mediocre for the older crowd. Indie Spotfest Dumbassery to kick off the show, a few segments that made me question if I was tasting pennies, a decent match with First Class, the stalled push never relevant squad match between Jake and Laredo, and at least the main event match was fun.

The video packages always feel lackluster because the only people really watching TNA currently are hardcore fans. I never really see too many people pull the whole “whoa first TNA episode in 11 years and I decided on the random Go Home instead of the first live episode since 2015”. See, this is why logic matters in booking. WWE gets to have the mentality of “it could be someone’s first time watching it” every week because they the biggest show in town. The name alone will garner random views or transient lapsed fans if they get a whiff of something. However when it comes down to TNA, people are only surprised its still alive.

Even with many questionable hours it wasn’t terrible. It did fine…plus like I just said, there’s opportunity for more random eyes thanks to the WWE merger AND a live episode next week. So the Go Home format won’t change, but hopefully the exposure gives us more congruent storylines.

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