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Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu News! (8/21/20) | The Chairshot
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Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu News! (8/21/20)

HPW checks in with Link.

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Hyrule Puro-Resu News Generic

What is going on with the former Triforce Champion?

Link lost the title on Treasure Island and apologized to his fans, and has been silent since. Hyrule Pro-Wrestling has sent a small news team to see how he’s doing.

 

Paya and crew arrive in Kakariko Village.

They pass by Karakiro High, Link’s alma mater, and see a crowd of students pulling down a “Home of the Triforce Champion” banner that was on the front of the building. Well, Link isn’t champion so it makes sense, but it’s still sad to see. Eventually, the crew arrives at Link’s home in “Old Kakariko.” The house itself is part tree, to Paya’s surprise. There’s a small crowd gathered on the sidewalk, of children and young adults wearing Link merchandise shirts. Three girls out in front wear “I <3 Link” shirts, one in red, one in blue and one in green. The crowd sees the crew and all start asking things. Paya nervously asks they settle down and let them through. Is she here to see Link? Yes, actually. Paya is fairly sure their questions are the same as hers, so please be patient.

Paya goes up the steps and knocks on the door. An old woman slowly opens the door and is surprised to see the cameraman. “Are you here from Publishers Clearing-” No, ma’am, they’re from HPW. 8G Double Who? Paya speaks up as she she says, “No, H P W. Is Link home?” Zlink? No one named Zlink lives here. A young woman hurries over. “Grandma, I think you need to turn up your hearing aid.” The old woman does exactly that. “I think you have a point, Aryll. I’m sorry about that, who were you again?” Paya introduces herself and again says she’s here on behalf of HPW, Hyrule Pro-Wrestling. “Oh, HPW! Of course! Link’s been in his room, waiting for someone to finally deliver that title belt. We can’t wait to see it shine with the new plates.” Um, new plates?

Mrs… Link’s Grandmother… Wait, what is Link’s last name? Well, that’s besides the point now. Link isn’t- Aryll interrupts, suggesting to Grandma that they should give their guests something to drink. Grandma agrees and goes to the kitchen while Aryll leads the crew down the hall and up the stairs. Aryll quietly explains that Grandma doesn’t really know what happened on Treasure Island. Grandma fell asleep somewhere near the end of the Eventide Challenge match. She felt bad missing the main event, and Aryll didn’t have the heart to tell her Link lost. Aryll’s been covering up things but it’s only a matter of time before Grandma finds out. Aryll wants the truth to come from Link, so please don’t say anything. They arrive at Link’s room and Aryll knocks on the door. “Big Brother? Some people from HPW are here to see you.”

It’s quiet enough in the hallway that they can hear inside Link’s room. It sounds like a flute is playing. Aryll opens the door and Link is playing Through the Water and the Waves on Ocarina Hero. “Really? You’re playing a video game?” Aryll huffs and puffs over to her brother and turns the console off! Link is about to say something but his sister cuts him off. “You need to tell Grandma the truth. Ms. Paya is here and they want to talk to you about stuff, and Grandma still thinks you’re champion!” Link sighs and drops his ocarina controller, but he doesn’t get up. Aryll puffs her cheeks more as she pulls his arm. Link grumbles but gets up, and Aryll pulls him along as she goes back out to the hall. Paya and cameraman quietly follow the siblings back to the den and find Grandma has served lemonade. “There he is! Now, let’s see that even shinier belt!”

The awkward silence confuses Grandma. Aryll tells her that Link has something to tell her about that. Aryll looks at her brother but he looks down at the floor. She nudges him with an expectant look and Link sighs again. He starts to say something, but Grandma speaks first. “You’re no longer champion, are you?” Link shakes his head, “No.” Why didn’t he and Aryll just say so? Link isn’t sure how to put it into words, so Aryll says that they didn’t want to break her heart. Grandma says him losing wouldn’t have hurt her. Them keeping this secret doesn’t exactly make her happy. But the only thing that could hurt her is if Link gave up. He hasn’t given up, has he? Paya would like to know that, too, actually.

Link takes a deep breath and stands up tall. He heads back to the hallway and up the stairs. The cameraman hurries after Link, but he’s already coming back with a big duffel bag and luggage. He brings those back to the living room and clearly Aryll and Grandma understand. Link’s not quitting HPW! He says good-bye to Aryll and Grandma before leaving with Paya and crew. But with Gerudo Canyon’s cards already set, when and where will Link get back in the ring again?


My Thoughts:

Hooray for introducing Aryll and Grandma a la Wind Waker! And I realized that Link has never lived directly in Kakariko Village, but in Link to the Past and A Link Between Worlds, his house was just on the outskirts. I also decided to make the house part tree like in Twilight Princess. And of course he wasn’t quitting, he’s Link! Just wait to see when he shows up again.

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Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu News Report! (5/23/25)

What’s with all the glowing?

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HPW Investigates: The Glowing Aura Phenomenon…

Riju, Sidon, Thunderbird, Donny B. Kool, Yunobo. Five stars of HPW have had powerful performances, but there’s something more to it… What is the reason behind this modern mystery? And could there be another?

 

Reviewing the timeline of events…

March 21st, the Triforce Tournament Bracket Finals

As the Gerudo Sisterhood was settling its grudge, Riju fought as hard as she could as the massive underdog against the Dame of the Dunes. Riju would survive heavy impact, begin to glow as she made her comeback, but Shabonne made sure she would lose the match. On that same night, we would see Sidon and Thunderbird each have their own moment where, after surviving heavy damage, they would begin to glow and make their comebacks. From there, Sidon and Thunderbird would win their way into the Triforce Tournament Finals at the Triforce Annivesary show.

 

April 1st, The Triforce Anniversary

Not only would we see Sidon & Thunderbird each bring out that same glowing energy, but Donny B. Kool would bring out that same phenomenon during the 21 Person Battle Royal. Donny held his own, but with that many opponents, winning was unlikely, and he was eliminated fifth-to-last.

 

May 1st, Wrestling Is Life

Yunobo won that 21 Person Battle Royal in April, and made his challenge for the HPW Death Mountain Championship. Igos du Ikana was as sharp as ever, but both men pushed each other to their limits. Yunobo powered through submissions and sharp strikes, bringing about the glowing aura, but Igos still won the match and retained the title.

 

So what might this all mean?

Five stars have been seen with glowing auras during the emotional heights of these matches. Or perhaps, the glowing auras are the results of these emotional heights? Could they be brought about by the “fighting spirit” within each one and in turn bring out new strength and energy? Each one of the five certainly seemed to “dig down deep” and fight like they were rising above mortal expectations.

Another detail that must be considered is the number of people who have presented this glowing aura phenomenon. Five people, with no connections between them: Riju the Gerudo; Sidon the Zora; Thunderbird the Ruto; Donny B. Kool the Gero; and Yunobo the Goron. Granted, they’re all young, and certainly leading this new generation forward. But the number itself is a point of focus. Needless to say that in Hyrule, three is the magic number, originating with the Triforce of legend. Therefore, multiples of three are also important. Five recorded phenomena, could this be a breaking of the norm? Or could there be a sixth?

Images flash on screen of the many faces on the HPW roster. Who could it be that enters the GAP?

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Bandwagon Nerds

Bandwagon Nerds #289: The Rest of Us

The Nerds discuss trailers for Ironheart and Superman, talk about the greatness that was Andor Season 2, break down casting news, and much more!

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This week, the Bandwagon takes a limited, but massively important, trip to the Trailer Park as we got the first trailer for Ironheart and the first full trailer for James Gunn’s Superman. What did the guys think of them, and how are they feeling about the way summer is shaping up as a possible resurgence in great superhero movies? Speaking of great, Andor Season 2 concluded this week. Patrick and Dave have made it known to all just how much they love the show, and they offer a mini-review of what made Season 2 so great… and how it makes watching Rogue One again a completely new experience. We also have casting news for the Buffy the Vampire Slayer reboot, as well as some surprise choices for the upcoming John Madden movie. All that plus, Max is going back to its roots, Christopher Nolan continues to innovate the movie industry, Jessica Jones is heading to the MCU, and VFX workers take a big step towards unionizing.

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Join Patrick O’Dowd, David Ungar, PC Tunney, Rey Cash, and DPP as they keep everyone up on all things nerd and maybe add some new nerds along the way. It’s the Bandwagon Nerds Podcast!

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Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

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CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

Patrick O'Dowd's 5X5

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