The last SmackDown before going to Hell in a Cell!
The Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns, is FINALLY going to reveal to us all what consequences he has in store for Jey Uso in their WWE Universal Championship I Quit in the cell match!!
- 8 Man Tag: Daniel Bryan, Kevin Owens & The Street Profits VS Cesaro, Shinsuke Nakamura, Robert Roode & Dolph Ziggler; Bryan, Kevin & The Street Profits win.
- Bianca Belair VS ???; Belair wins.
- Lars Sullivan VS Chad Gable; Sullivan wins.
- Seth Rollins VS Buddy Murphy; Rollins wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
SmackDown opens with the Kevin Owens Show!
“Now that the dust has settled and everyone has fulfilled their contractual obligations, we’re good right? Everybody’s where they’re supposed to be?” Then Kevin is excited to welcome us to the KO Show on his new home, Friday Night SmackDown! The ThunderDome is fired up for Kevin’s first guest on this special SmackDown KO Show. It’s the four-time WWE champion and most technically skilled competitor to ever step into the ring, it is… DANIEL BRYAN! The Yes Movement leader heads to the ring and the ThunderDome echoes the “YES! YES! YES!” Kevin and Bryan take a seat and Bryan loves the set-up.
Firstly, Kevin thanks Bryan for accepting the invitation. Second, he wants to thank Bryan for the superstars he’s looking forward to facing, because Kevin feels the same. These two have beaten the hell out of each other, but that’s part of it. They push each other. That is what Bryan wants from every superstar on SmackDown. A great opinion to have, and Bryan has been very vocal about his opinion. What exactly does he see for SmackDown’s future? Bryan wants SmackDown to highlight the absolute best in the world. And this roster now nails that! They have the best fresh, young talent in the world! Even people who stepped up before the draft! Big E, Jey Uso, Bryan wants to see who is next!
But on a more personal note, one thing that would make SmackDown better for everyone is to have a championship defended each and every week, and that championship should be the Intercontinental Championship. Bryan wants to see that title on the line every week! A great idea, too! Kevin is flattered that Bryan is suggesting him for such a role. Kevin asked Bryan here for that reason, to talk about championships, and even more specifically… the SmackDown Tag Teams Championships! Can you believe Kevin’s never been a tag team champion in the WWE? Yeah, Kevin’s betrayed a lot of his friends… Well, we’ll gloss over that. But Kevin knows where Bryan is going, but he’s thinking about the wrong part. Imagine them as a team! Kevin already has a name: Team Hell KO. No that’d be if he teamed with Kane. That’s the hell part. Oh, of course. But Kevin and Bryan would be a great team! Even better than Hell No!
But now Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode interrupt!? Ziggler hears Bryan talking about hot, fresh, young talent, so he couldn’t be talking about anyone else but these two. Hot for teacher, baby! Kev, c’mon. Ziggler and Roode love to party, run with the devil. Kevin’s having a party and didn’t invite them? C’mon. Roode says Kevin is talking about a fantasy tag team when they should be talking about two of the best SmackDown acquisitions ever, and one of the best tag teams ever! But here come the SmackDown Tag Team Champions, the Street Profits! They make it rain Solo cups and are fired up to start Friday night partying! Especially with these two acting like they’re the new hires. Please, y’all looked like you stepped out of 1984. Uh, the greatest album of all time? Thank you! Hey, Ziggler, the Profits didn’t forget what they were doing last week.
But nonetheless, the Profits are so excited to be on Friday Night SmackDown! Why? The Profits are up, and #WeWantTheSmoke! But here come Shinsuke Nakamura and Cesaro! “Surprise, surprise.” So much disrespect in the face of the two men who have carried SmackDown’s tag division for MONTHS. New Day steals the titles, and then hand them over to the Profits like a game of White Elephant. Bryan tells Kevin they can test that tag team theory of his, right now! They and the Profits start brawling with the Glorious Show-Offs and the former champions! The bell rings to try and stop this, and here comes Adam Pearce with the cavalry! Will this be sorted out after SmackDown goes to break?
8 Man Tag: Daniel Bryan, Kevin Owens & The Street Profits VS Cesaro, Shinsuke Nakamura, Robert Roode & Dolph Ziggler!
SmackDown returns and these fearsome foursomes are fighting, playa! Will Bryan say “YES!” to being the Prizefighter’s tag partner after they, Montez Ford & Angelo Dawkins shut down the Swiss Cyborg, King of Strong Style and Glorious Show-Offs?
Nakamura already has Kevin down in the corner and gives him Bad Vibrations! The ref counts, Kevin fights up and throws haymakers all around! Nakamura kicks low, whips but Kevin kicks back! Kevin atomic drops, runs and LARIATS Nakamura down! Then he drops the back senton! Kevin tags Dawkins in, Dawkins drags Nakamura up but Nakamura knees low and throws more knees! Tag to Cesaro, they double whip Dawks and double BOOT him down! Cover, ONE! Cesaro keeps on Dawkins and tags in Roode. They mug Dawkins together and Roode bumps Dawkins off buckles. Roode throws haymakers and stomps, then lets off at the ref’s count. Roode drags Dawkins up, snapmares him and runs to drop an elbow but misses as Dawkins moves!
Dawkins brings Roode up, tags Ford, and the Profits work together to run Roode over! Back suplex splash! Cover, TWO! Ford keeps focus as he brings Roode around. Roode knees low, reels Ford in and suplexes, but Ford slips out to headlock! Ziggler tags in as Roode powers out and Ziggler dropkicks Ford down! Cover, TWO! Ziggler drags Ford back up to choke on ropes and rake the eyes! The ref reprimands and backs Ziggler off but Nakamura gets a cheap shot in! Ziggler taunts Ford, headlocks him and tags in Roode. The mugging continues and Roode brings Ford up for a backbreaker! Cover, TWO! Roode keeps close, tags Cesaro back in, and they mug Ford with a boot to the chest! Cesaro stomps Ford, drags him up and throws a BIG European Uppercut. Tag to Nakamura, they stmop away on Ford in the corner!
Nakamura snapmares Ford and tells the others to “C’MON!” Knee drop! Cover, TWO! Tag to Cesaro, they mug Ford with more boots! Cesaro has the chinbar and armlock but Ford endures. Ford fights up but he’s thrown into the corner. Ford fights out with boots and haymakers! Cesaro back suplexes, Ford lands on his feet to enziguri! Ford hurries, hot tag to BRYAN! Bryan throws EuroUppers on Cesaro! Bryan whips, Cesaro reverses but Bryan kicks back! Bryan dumps Cesaro out, builds speed and DIVEDS! Direct hit to the ramp! Bryan KICKS away on Cesaro, puts him back in the ring and the ThunderDome fires up! Bryan climbs up top, leaps, crossbody is CAUGHT! Cesaro pops Bryan up but Bryan shoves him to the corner to hit the dropkick! Bryan whips, Cesaro reverses but Bryan goes up and over, only for his leg to buckle!
Cesaro watches closely but the ref check son Bryan. Bryan gets up but Cesaro BLASTS him out of the ring! Kevin goes out to check on Bryan but the ref tells him to go back to his corner. Cesaro STOMPS Bryan down on the outside and goes after the leg! Cesaro SMASHES the knee on the ground, then lets off at the ref’s count. Bryan is in bad shape as SmackDown goes to break!
SmackDown returns and Roode stomps Bryan’s knee at ropes. Ziggler gets in to pull on the leg against the ropes! The ref counts, Ziggler lets off, Roode gets a cheap shot in! Kevin and the Profits protest but it all goes unnoticed. Ziggler eggs Bryan on, “Do something! Fight for yourself!” Bryan hits back! Bryan gets up, Ziggler chop blocks the leg! Tag to Cesaro, they split the wishbone! Cesaro drops an elbow on the leg, turns Bryan over and has the leg for a Half Crab at an angle! Bryan endures, fights over, but it becomes a ONE LEG SWING! Cesaro throws Bryan to his corner, tags Ziggler, and they stomp away! Ziggler taunts Bryan again, daring him to get up! Bryan manages to stand, but Ziggler jumps! Bryan catches the leg to catapult Ziggler into a corner! Both men are down and the fans fire up!
Ziggler and Bryan crawl, tag to Roode and Roode drags Bryan back to SMASH the knee! Roode DECKS Dawkins just because before he stomps Bryan’s leg. Roode stands Bryan up to CHOP! Roode puts Bryan up top, throws haymakers then climbs up to join him. Bryan fights Roode off and sends him down with a headbutt! Bryan adjusts, leaps, missile dropkick! Double-edged as it was, both Bryan and Roode are down! Hot tags to Dawkins and Nakamura! Dawkins rallies with big clotheslines, then a flying elbow! FLAPJACK for Cesaro! Dropkick for Ziggler! CYCLONE SPLASH for Nakamura! BULLDOG! Cover, TWO! Nakamura flounders up, kicks back but Dawkins blocks one, only to get the left! BACKSTABBER! Cover, TWO!
Nakamura tags Cesaro, then hits Ford off the corner! FLYING KNEE to GUT WRENCH BOMB! Cover, Kevin breaks it! Kevin throws Nakamura out, ducks Roode and give shim a STUNNER! Ziggler leaps, SATELLITE DDT! Dawkins clotheslines Ziggler out! Cesaro rolls Dawkins up but has ropes! The ref sees that in time and stops, Dawkins dodges Cesaro to CASH OUT! Bryan LEAPS to KNEE Nakamura down, Kevin CANNONBALLS onto Ziggler and Roode! Tag to Ford, he goes up top, FROM THE HEAVENS! Cover, the Profits, Kevin and Bryan win!
Winners: Kevin Owens, Daniel Bryan & The Street Profits, by pinfall
The SmackDown Tag Team Champions win alongside two incredible former world champions! Will Bryan and Kevin stick together to see if they can’t be tag team champions in their own right?
SmackDown presents: Law & Otis.
“In the WWE Justice System, superstars are generally represented by attorneys. Except for Otis, who has decided to represent himself. This is his story.” DUN DUN! Otis, The Miz and John Morrison finally take the issue of the Money in the Bank briefcase to court! And it’s the APA presiding! Ron “Farooq” Simmons is the bailiff, and “the honorable” John Bradshaw Layfield is the judge! “For the record, in this case, the plaintiff, Mr. Mizanin, is suing the defendant, Otis, for emotional distress, wanton destruction of property, creating an unsafe work environment, and MITB negligence.” With that said, counselor, proceed with opening arguments. Miz has his lawyer stand down so that he can speak.
“Your honor, I am here for the truth.” Case law is on Miz’s side. He can site Intic VS Carrington. Shmuck VS United States. Marbury VS Madison. But more importantly, the truth is on Miz’s side! The truth is, Otis has victimize Miz both physically and emotionally. He has not upheld the responsibilities of being Mr. MITB. As a former Mr. MITB, it is Miz’s duty to right this wrong and lawfully remove the contract from Otis’ possession to place in the hands of an honorable superstar: The Miz. That is the truth. DUN DUN. Well said, bro. JBL gives Otis his chance to speak. Otis says that he deserves the MITB contract because he won the match. Thank you. DUN DUN. Wait that’s all? It was a good argument, though… You’re fired, Sharon. To be continued later tonight!
Bryan, Kevin and the Profits are fired up backstage!
They won together and now they celebrate together! Bryan says that was RAD! He’s up with the smoke! Fist him, boys! Um… Bryan, no, that’s… But bro fist is fine! The Profits head out, Kevin goes with them, and Bryan says SmackDown is the best! Sami Zayn comes over and congratulates Bryan. Is his leg okay? Yeah, he’s good. Sami wants to say before this goes any further, how Bryan was kinda badmouthing him on the KO Show. Bryan kept going on about how the Intercontinental Championship should be defended every week, Sami will stop him right there. Sami will say again that he does NOT share that vision. This title is important, valuable and Sami’s, so he dictates the terms on how often and against who he defends it. And he already has against some of the best, which includes Bryan at WrestleMania.
So going forward, whatever vision Bryan has for the title, keep them to yourself. Because as long as Sami is champion, Sami will do things his way. Sami leaves, but is Bryan going to find a way to make his vision a reality?
Bianca Belair VS ???
The EST of WWE is the strongEST, fastEST, roughEST, toughEST, smartEST, and tonight, the readiEST for action! Will Bianca start her rise towards the SmackDown Women’s Championship tonight?
SmackDown returns and Bianca’s opponent is Zelina Vega! There’s history here from Monday Night Raw and how these two, alongside the Street Profits and the former team of Andrade Almas and Angel Garza, fought back and forth. Will things continue as they did on Raw? Or will La Muneca ruin Bianca’s Friday night debut?
The bell rings, the two tie up, Bianca powers Zelina to a corner but Zelina goes up the buckles. Zelina is on the top rope, Bianca lets off and Zelina SLAPS her! Bianca grabs Zelina’s hair! And then brings her off with a TOSS! Bianca claps back at Zelina literally, and then says, “Girl. Uh-uh.” But Zelina kicks back! Zelina baits Bianca in to tweak the arm! Then wrenches to a wristlock, but Bianca scoops and SLAMS her! Bianca stomps Zelina, whips her but Zelina ducks and dodges and tilt-o-whirls, but Bianca handsprings through! Bianca comes back to run Zelina over! Bianca walks all over Zelina to then standing moonsault! And kip up! Bianca says “Kiss this,” but Zelina goes to the apron. Zelina holds the apron skirt as Bianca drags her in. Zelina finally lets go but kicks back, then rolls to KICK again! And again!
Zelina has Bianca in a corner to rocket kick her! Zelina goes up, leaps, flying huricanrana! Bianca flounders, Zelina comes back but the flip is blocked to a pop-up RIGHT HAND! Bianca looms over Zelina, Zelina begs for mercy but Bianca dead lifts a la clean ‘n jerk! And then trophy lifts, carriers Zelina around, and drops her on the buckles! Bianca brings Zelina back up, torture rack, K O D! Cover, Bianca wins!
Winner: Bianca Belair, by pinfall
The Kiss of Death was the end for this match, but will Bianca start blazing the hottEST trail to the championship?
Lars Sullivan VS Chad Gable!
Before The Freak heads to the ring, Shorty G is asked what compelled him to accept a match with a superstar that has only brought carnage since his return? Gable says he is fed up with things right now. He couldn’t get drafted by Raw or SmackDown, what’s going on here? That is blatant disrespect! So naturally, it is up to him to right the ship, he’s calling out the big man to turn this right around. Gable’s going to prove he belongs! But will Gable find he would’ve been better off taking tonight off?
The bell rings and Gable circles with Lars. Gable dodges Lars, goes up top and leaps, into Lars’ arms and FALL AWAY SLAM! Lars laughs as he stalks over to Gable. Lars looms over Gable, drags him up and whips him, for a MILE HIGH FLAPJACK! Lars laughs more as he watches Gable writhe. Lars drags Gable up, scoops him, but Gable rakes eyes to get free! Gable throws a throat chop! And clubs Lars on the back! Gable runs corner to corner to ROLLING KICK! And then another, only to be sent into buckles! Lars snarls, roars, and TOSSES Gable across the ring! Lars drags Gable up, reels him in and CLOBBERS him! Lars is only getting angrier as he drags Gable back up, for the FREAK ACCIDENT! Cover, Lars wins!
Winner: Lars Sullivan, by pinfall
Shorty G aimed high but came crashing down! Will Lars look to lay waste to the entire SmackDown roster? Kayla Braxton asks Gable feels now after that match. “I… I quit…” Gable quits SmackDown?! But then where is he going to go?
Backstage interview with Seth Rollins.
Tonight, he and his former disciple, Buddy Murphy, settle things after Murphy got in on the fun- Fun? No, that was “fun.” His disciple, the guy he plucked from obscurity and guided through life, disrespected and assaulted him. But Rollins will have fun doing what he does tonight. He asked for this match for a reason. Murphy, like many, is confused. His emotions are tearing him apart, and Rollins understands. But what Murphy and everyone else needs to understand, the greater good is all of us! We all have a role, Murphy has his. Rollins is the messiah, Murphy is the disciple. Rollins is the savior, Murphy is a follower. There’s no shame in that. Tonight, Rollins will define Murphy’s role for him. Now that sounds fun, doesn’t it?
Roman Reigns tries to eat, but is not hungry.
The bread, the fruits, none of it is appetizing right now. That’s because he is preoccupied with business tonight, as he will finally issue the consequences for his match with Jey Uos. What will the Tribal Chief add to the already brutal combination of an I Quit match inside a Hell in a Cell?!
Adam Pearce checks on Shorty G in the trainer’s room.
Pearce wants him to reconsider saying he quit. But Gable said he quit, because he quits being Shorty G! He’s done being a character talking about accepting who you are and how it’ll all be fine. He doesn’t accept this crap! He’s done being a “smarmy little punching bag” and a happy face on top of every little PSA! It’s a joke! “Just accept who you are and you can achieve anything you are!” Who are we kidding? Not everyone can achieve everything, and neither can Shorty G. The only man who can will be the Olympian, the state, national and world champion collegiate wrestler, with a list of achievements so big it has to be seen to be believed. Trust him, it’s long. That man is Chad Gable! No more nicknames and no more games! Will Gable show us how to get things done?
Bayley is in the ring!
The SmackDown Women’s Champion is already seated in that chair, with belt in one hand and mic in the other. “I’m feeling really annoyed that I even have to come out here and address this tonight.” But today, she did four interviews. And instead of them appreciating their time with her, they asked the same dumb questions about Sasha Banks! Bayley can’t get away from Sasha! “Why are you hesitating? What is it going to take for you to sign the contract? Are you afraid?” No she’s not afraid! Sasha doesn’t deserve this! Sasha is an ungrateful brat and Bayley won’t give her what she wants. Bayle did what she did in walking out because she wants to be done with Sasha. But now Sasha is a bigger pain in the ass than before! Sasha even said, and Bayley quotes, “I am Sasha Banks. And my name is bigger than your title.”
PFFFT! Really?! Bayley doesn’t think so. Sasha is getting so conceited that her head won’t fit inside of the cell! But that doesn’t matter because Bayley did not and will not sign, so burn the contract! Sasha likes to say she’s The Boss, but DING DONG, HELLO! You are not the boss of Bayley! But here comes Sasha! And she has the contract in her hand! Sasha heads to the ring with it, Bayley says she’s still not signing, but Sasha tells her to. Bayley doesn’t do what Sasha tells her. Sasha says Bayley started this and Sasha is going to end it. Bayley grabs her chair! Sasha ducks that to grab the belt Bayley left behind! Bayley wants the belt back. Sign the contract. Give her the belt. Sign the contract. Fine. But Bayley grabs at the belt, and gets a KNEE to the head for it!
Sasha grabs the chair! And puts it around Bayley’s head! Sasha says Bayley is going to sign or else! Bayley kicks Sasha away! Bayley gets up, but she’s still in the chair! Sasha puts the BANK STATEMENT on with the CHAIR included!! Bayley refuses to sign but Sasha cranks back harder! Bayley gives in and signs on the dotted line! Sasha lets go, and then KICKS Bayley down! NOW it’s official, and it’s happening this Sunday! “On Sunday, I’m going to take your title, and I am going to finish what you started.” Sasha has issued her ultimatum. Will Bayley’s first match inside the cell be her last as champion?
SmackDown presents Law & Otis, part 2.
Miz has Morrison as his witness on the stand. Morrison says Otis assaulted Miz, and him, and a lot of people. “It’s hard to put into words the trauma that we’ve endured.” It isn’t so much the physical scars, but the emotional ones. DUN DUN. Miz gives Morrison a handkerchief to wipe the tears. But to counter, Otis calls REY MYSTERIO to the stand! Mysterio was in the MITB Corporate Ladder match with Otis. Eight walked in, only one walked out, and that was Otis. As far as Mysterio is concerned, Otis is the rightful owner. DUN DUN. Asuka is also a witness for the defense as she talks to her role in the Corporate Ladder match. But it’s hard to keep up with her fast Japanese. But again, she won like Otis won, so the point is, Otis should stay Mr. MITB. JBL asks if the court stenographer got that. Every single word, playa. TEDDY LONG!? DUN DUN!
Tucker appears! He is Otis’ best friend. And while Otis may not be as educated as some, the big man is sensitive. Miz crossed the line taking Otis’ girlfriend, Mandy, and trading her to Raw. Miz deserves everything that’s come his way. Permission to treat the witness as hostile. JBL was hoping for that. Miz counters Tucker by saying he says Miz deserved emotional distress, unsafe work environment AND destruction of property caused by Otis?! Yes. Then isn’t it true that during this time, Otis NEGLECTED the contract? What does that even mean!? ANSWER THE QUESTION! All Tucker knows is that ever since Miz started messing with Otis, all Otis can focus on is beating the crap out of Miz. And now that Tucker thinks about it, he wants to beat Miz up right NOW! DUN DUN!
Miz hurries away and Otis tells Tucker to stand down. Order in the court!! Ron tells them all to shut up! DUN DUN. Let’s take a short recess. And when we reconvene, Judge JBL will render the verdict. Teddy’s gotta pee, playa. Be right back. DUN DUN. To be continue in part 3!
SmackDown returns with Law & Otis, part 3!
Judge JBL returns and everyone takes their seats. “In all of this legal uproar, something is missing. And that something IS the truth.” JBL is supposed to believe Otis is responsible for emotional distress, destruction of property and creating an unsafe working environment? He’s a WWE superstar. That’s the job description. if those are crimes, APA would be serving life sentences. And Miz’s accusations of negligence, while it is true Otis has yet to cash in the MITB contract, that is NOT negligence. It is established in the contract that the winner has a full year to cash in. DUN DUN. Why does that keep happening? But after deliberation, JBL will rule in favor of- Miz wants one more second. He forgot to submit a key piece of evidence. Miz is lucky JBL has let him interrupt this entire trial. Yes, but JBL should really admit this evidence. DUN DUN.
JBL has Bailiff Simmons retrieve this leather briefcase Miz has and bring it to the bench. Inside the briefcase is… A HUGE AMOUNT OF CASH!! JBL smirks. “In light of the new evidence, I have no recourse but to side in favor of the plaintiff, the Miz.” WHAT?! Otis must appear at HIAC this Sunday to compete in a match with The Miz. The winner then will receive and keep the MITB contract. Court adjourned. The Miz abuses the system, and all Simmons can say is, “DAMN!” Will Otis still be able to tip the scales of justice in his favor now that he can legally get his hands on Miz and beat him up?
Seth Rollins VS Buddy Murphy!
Monday Night Messiah no more, this is SmackDown’s Savior that heads to the ring! But will he “define” Murphy’s future in their Friday night in-ring debuts?
SmackDown returns as Murphy makes his entrance. Aalyah Mysterio is watching backstage as Murphy gets in the ring. The bell rings, Murphy glares at Rollins as Rollins smirks. They tie up, go around and end up on ropes. Murphy puts Rollins in a corner but Rollins turns it around. The ref counts, Rollins lets off and reminds Murphy, “Messiah. Disciple.” Rollins pokes Murphy in the head, but Murphy comes back with another tie-up! Murphy puts Rollins in the corner again, Rollins turns things around again, but Murphy turns it back! The ref counts, Murphy lets off, but Rollins pushes him. “What don’t you understand, Murphy!?” Another poke in the head, but Murphy grins as he grabs the arm and yanks and yanks! Murphy grinds Rollins down and grinds him into the mat!
Rollins endures, fights up but Murphy wrenches. Rollins wrenches back, yanks and wristlocks, but Murphy rolls and handsprings to wrench back. Rollins wrenches, Murphy spins and headlocks to the takeover but Rollins headscissors back. Murphy pops out, Rollins ROCKS him! Rollins drags Murphy up, headlocks and takeover again, but Murphy keeps shoulders up. Murphy pushes back with forearms and gets up, but Rollins holds on as Murphy tries to power out. Murphy fights up again, powers out this time, but Rollins runs him over! Rollins runs, Murphy stays low then hurdles over but Rollins grabs ropes. Rollins laughs at Murphy and shouts, “When are you going to learn?” Rollins pushes Murphy but Murphy DECKS Rollins!
Rollins is furious as he gets up and swings on Murphy. Murphy dodges, huricanranas and sends Rollins out! Murphy runs, slides, but Rollins gets under. Rollins runs, but is back dropped onto the announce desk! Rollins tumbles down as SmackDown goes to break!
SmackDown returns again and Murphy punches but Rollins knees low. Rollins whips, runs in but Murphy elbows back! Murphy goes up, brings Rollins in, tornado hotshot! Rollins is down, Murphy goes back up but Rollins trips him up! Murphy tumbles down to the floor, Aalyah grows concerned for Murphy, but the family finds her. Why is she watching this? She’s just watching Murphy! She can watch who she wants! Rollins puts Murphy back in as Rey and Dominik want Alayah to leave. Rollins fireman’s carries and GUT BUSTERS Murphy! Cover, TWO! Rollins grows frustrated and he drags Murphy into a bearhug. Murphy endures, fights up, powers Rollins to a corner, but Rollins squeezes tighter. Murphy keeps ramming Rollins into buckles, but Rollins throws him in! Rollins runs in but Murphy BOOTS him away!
Murphy goes up and missile dropkicks! Rollins flounders but both men are down. The two stir and stand, Murphy rallies with clotheslines! Murphy dodges and calf kicks on the rebound! Murphy kips up, throws Rollins out, then wrecks him with a dropkick! Murphy builds speed and this time he FLIES! Direct hit at the ramp! Both men are down, the ring count begins but Murphy is up at 4 to put Rollins in at 5. Murphy climbs up top at 6, Rollins stands but Murphy gets him with METEORA! But Murphy can’t cover, his own arm might’ve landed bad! Cover, TWO!! Rollins and Murphy flounder around and Rollins gets to ropes. Murphy hurries after, going to the outside. Murphy works to put his shoulder back in, but Rollins runs to DIVE! Direct hit sends Murphy into barriers!
Rollins puts Murphy in, springboards and FLYING KNEES! Cover, TWO!! Murphy is still in this and Rollins is shocked! Murphy rolls out to the apron but Rollins is on him! Rollins drags Murphy up, wrenches and WRINGS the arm out into the apron! Aalyah is concerned and the Mysterios themselves aren’t sure what to think. Murphy is down and SmackDown goes to another break.
SmackDown returns again and Rollins has Murphy up top. Murphy resists, throws body shots, and then adjusts to sunset flip! Rollins holds on, Murphy lets go to tuck Rollins in, CHEEKY NANDOS! Murphy gets Rollins off the top, but his body gives out! Rollins drags Murphy up, to BUCKLE BOMB! Murphy is down, Rollins runs, but into a KNEE TRIGGER! Both men are down again! Murphy crawls to a cover, TWO!! Rollins still lives! Murphy crawls to a corner while Rollins checks his jaw. Murphy hobbles over, Rollins elbows him back! Rollins snarls, slaps Murphy and says he has disrespected Rollins. Rollins slaps him around, drags him up, and says, “I am the Messiah, YOU are the disciple!” He DECKS Murphy, then demands he get up! Murphy does stand, and DECKS Rollins in return!
Rollins gets up, he ROCKS Murphy! Murphy stands to ROCK Rollins! They go back and forth, Murphy gets the edge, fires off a strike fest but Rollins blocks momentarily. Murphy keeps going, misses the knee thrust, PELE! Murphy rebounds but cradle counters, TWO!! ROLLING ELBOW from Rollins! FALCON ARROW! Cover, TWO!! Murphy survives and Rollins is seething! Rollins pushes past Murphy and says, “You’re gonna learn, Murphy. One way or another.” Rollins aims from the corner as Murphy rises. CURB- NO! Murphy rolls Rollins, avoids another stomp and shoves him! Rollins elbows back, climbs up top, but Murphy enziguris first! Murphy drags Rollins off the top, but Rollins slits put and wrenches to wring out the arm! CURB STOMP!! Cover, Rollins wins!
Winner: Seth Rollins, by pinfall
But the lesson is not over! Rollins gets a kendo stick! Aalyah begs Rey and Dom do something to help Murphy, but they refuse. This is not their business. If they’re not going to, then SHE will! Aalyah runs off, referees tell Rollins to stop but he refuses. Rollins is in the ring, with the kendo stick, and he tells Murphy he’s going to learn to stay behind the savior! “Nobody has your back!” But here comes Aalyah! Rollins laughs. What is she going to do? Where’s her back-up? Rollins SMACKS away on Murphy! Aalyah gets in the ring to shield Murphy, but here comes Dom! Rollins leaves now, and Dom can’t believe what Aalyah is doing! This is not their business anymore! Rollins CLOBBERS Dom from behind! Rollins still hates the Mysterios, but here comes REY! WITH A CHAIR!
Rollins bails out, and Rey check son his son and daughter, not Murphy. They keep trying to reason with her, and now Dom and Rey argue about if Aalyah should even be here. Aalyah helps Murphy up, and brother and father don’t understand. What is happening with this triangle of Rollins, Murphy and Mysterio family?
A SmackDown staffer knocks on Roman Reigns’ door.
But it’s Paul Heyman that answers. Apologies, but it is time for Roman’s segment. No, it’s Roman’s time when Roman says. Heyman will go talk with Roman, and we’ll see if the champ is ready. Will the Tribal Chief be ready to issue his edict after the break?
Roman Reigns heads to the ring!
It seems he did deem it the right time. The WWE Universal Champion and his Special Counsel in Paul Heyman are here as Roman holds that title overhead. Heyman gets the mic to hand it to Roman. But Jey interrupts the Tribal Chief via titantron! He’s in the VIP suite, looking at the Tribal Cheese, the Tribal Berries, and some ice cold H2O. It must be great to be chief. Or maybe it’s better to be the cousins of the chief. At least, it was. Roman changed. Roman has his head so far up his chief ass that he’s lost connection with himself and his family. But who is he to say? Because This isn’t Jey, it’s JIMMY!! And Jey’s right there! Jey attacks Roman and rains down hands! Roman pushes him away, runs in at him but Jey POSTS Roman first! Jey goes out to grab a chair! And he brings it in to swing, but into a BOOT!
Roman gets the chair while Jey flounders! Jey gets up to SUPERKICK back!! Jey goes up top, and leaps, USO SPLASH! The Usos used twin magic to get the better of the “chief,” but it won’t be a match won with splashes and pinfalls! Will Jey be able to push Roman to the edge and make him say two words we’ve never heard? Heyman gets Roman the mic, because he still has to say what he came here to say! “It’s all just games, huh? It’s funny to you boys, because you don’t understand. I understand.” If Roman quits, he isn’t champion, face of the WWE, head of the table or Tribal Chief, and therefore is not the provider for generations of their bloodline! If they make Roman quit.
But the question is, can they? Because when Roman makes Jey quit, and he will make Jey quit… Jey will fall in line, take his orders, and acknowledge him and respect him for who he is in the WWE and all that he does for the family! And if he still can’t, then Jey is OUT of the family. Jimmy is in this now, too. Their wives, their children, their children’s children, are ALL disowned!! “We will all turn our backs on you. Those are your consequences.” The cell lowers to show what Roman is ready for, and what Jey must prepare for. But Jey IS ready, as he climbs the outside to stare Roman down! Will the Usos be exiled from the Anoa’i Dynasty when Jey can’t endure it anymore?
What a great episode, though it could’ve been greater. To start, I was hoping Sasha was going to rough Bayley up even worse than she did to make her sign the contract, maybe draw some blood. Maybe they’re saving that for the match. And then, while I’ve never really referred to him as Shorty G in matches, I’m glad that is done with for Chad Gable. He might even be turning Heel now after getting whooped by Lars like that. Opening with the KO Show was good, but I was really surprised that Kevin suggested to Bryan they try to be tag partners. Bryan was of course surprised, too, but they and the Profits had a great 8 Man with Cesaro, Nakamura, Roode and Ziggler.
Sami getting in Bryan’s face later is good, I think mingling the stories of Sami and the IC title with Kevin wanting the tag titles to complete his grand slam with Bryan stuck in the middle is great. Was kinda hoping Sami and Kevin would’ve been tag champions the last time they were all on SmackDown a year or so ago, but maybe a twist or swerve can make that happen this time. Bianca had a good match with Zelina but it seemed a shame it was so easy for Bianca to win. Maybe after Bayley VS Sasha, Bianca goes after whoever the champion is and we get some great promo banter on top of great in-ring action.
The “Law & Otis” segments were funny, and it was great to see Teddy Long and the APA back, but of course this turns into Otis VS Miz, MITB briefcase on the line. I hope Otis wins that just to shut Miz up, but at the same time, with both WWE World and WWE Universal championships on the line, there’s a good chance Miz wins to try and cash in on McIntyre to start a feud there. Maybe Tucker and Mandy get involved since this story involves them, too. Rollins VS Murphy was a great match, especially because it went so long. There was still the Mysterio family drama, which is fine because slowly, it is being what turned Murphy back to Face. It’s a bit of a shame nothing was set for HIAC, but perhaps Rey being at only 99% isn’t enough for WWE just yet. I hope things get settled before Survivor Series because this feud has been one of the longest all year, and a winner needs to be named to move up to a title.
And speaking of title, this has probably been the best thing WWE has done with the Universal Championship ever. Roman, Jey and Jimmy are all on point with their characters. Granted, I figured that was a twin magic trick when “Jey” was wearing hat and bandanna mask indoors, but it worked so perfectly because it’s the Usos. Jey getting the jump on Roman was great, but then Roman giving us the consequences was great, too. It made a lot of sense for the Usos’ consequences to be falling in line, and possibly being excommunicated. I don’t think Jey is winning the title, and yet I don’t know how well they’ll “fall in line” or how even the “excommunication” story will go. It’s all very unpredictable and that makes it very interesting. Rollins talks about being the messiah/savior of WWE, but I feel like this story right here is what is saving SmackDown.
My Score: 8.5/10
Mitchell’s AEW Rampage Results & Report! (12/1/23)
Best Friends are on a Rampage!
Will tonight be Very Nice, Very Evil or whatever?
Greetings humans! Danhausen is back in AEW, and to celebrate, he teams with Orange Cassidy, Trent Beretta & Hook in a Very Nice, Very BIG 8 Man Tag!
- 8 Man Tag: Orange Cassidy, Hook, Danhausen & Trent Beretta VS Matthew Menard, Angelo Parker & The Dark Order; OrangeHookHausen & Trent win.
- Six Man Tag: The Don Callis Family VS ???; The Don Callis Family wins.
- Six Woman Tag: Anna Jay & The Outcasts VS Hikaru Shida, Skye Blue & Kris Statlander; Shida, Skye & Statlander win.
- Six Man Tag: Penta El Zero Miedo, El Hijo Del Vikingo & Komander w/ Alex Abrahantes VS Brian Cage & The Workhorsemen w/ Prince Nana; Penta, Vikingo & Komander win.
PLAY BY PLAY
8 Man Tag: Orange Cassidy, Hook, Danhausen & Trent Beretta VS Matthew Menard, Angelo Parker & The Dark Order w/ Jake Hager!
OrangeHausen, HookHausen, OrangeHook, all of the above, and #JustTrent take on Daddy Magic, Cool Hang Ange, Alex Reynolds & Evil Uno in a big, super team-up type deal! But will the Very Nice, Very Evil Best Friends be victorious together? Or will the rogues gallery standing against them earn themselves quite a lot of golden opportunities all at once?
But wait, as Big Hurt Hager gets the VNVEBFs to turn their backs, the rogues attack! Fans boo, the bell rings, and all but Danhausen is tossed out of the ring as he tosses Reynolds instead. Uno CLUBS Danhausen, Cassidy is sent into railing, and Uno puts Danhausen in a corner. Uno CHOPS him, soaks up the heat, and then storms up. Danhausen kicks low, throws hands, but Uno kicks back. Uno whips corner to corner, runs in but into a BOOT! Danhausen runs up to RANA! Uno tumbles, fans fire up and Danhausen catches Reynolds as he runs in, wrench and NORTHERN LIGHTS! Fans fire up as Danhausen kicks low and tags Hook.
HookHausen double whip Uno, Uno holds ropes and Menard tags in. Menard, Parker and Reynolds all get in, but then so do Trent and Cassidy! The eight men are stare down, and the brawl is back on! The ref reprimands but the Dark Order & X-JAS get the edge. They all have someone in a corner, then they all coordinate to quadruple whip! But the Best Friends all reverse that, X-JAS and Dark Order crash into each other! And then Best Friends set up in the corners… and Hook needs to be coaxed a little bit, for the GROUP- NO, they all get kicked low! Fans boo as X-JAS & Dark Order reel them in, but the Best Friends QUADRUPLE SUPLEX!
Fans fire up because now we get the GROUP HUG! You GOT to give the people what they want! Hook then goes after Parker with body shots, but Menard storms up. Menard hits low, scoops Hook, BACKBREAKER and Parker KNEES Hook down! But Trent JUMP KNEES Parker down! Menard kicks low and POWERBOMBS Trent! Cassidy dodges Menard to tilt-o-whirl and DDT! Uno CHOPS Cassidy down! Danhausen baits Uno in for a GERMAN SUPLEX! Reynolds runs in, spins Danhausen and ROLLING ELBOWS!
Hook is back up, T-BONE for Reynolds! T-BONE for Parker! Uno is up, he kicks low and whips. Hook reverses that to clinch and T-BONE! Extra large serving for Uno there! But wait, here comes Wheeler Yuta! The ROH Pure Champion wants to taunt Hook like he has been for weeks now, and then Menard CLOBBERS Hook in the distraction! Yuta joins commentary while Menard bumps Hook off buckles, and reels him in for a big suplex! Tag to Parker and he stomps Hook down. Parker stomps more, then pushes Hook around. Parker tags Uno, they mug Hook. Uno then bumps Hook off the boots of Menard and Reynolds.
Reynolds tags in, he runs side to side to ELBOW Hook! Uno SPLASHES, short arm LARIATS, and Reynolds covers, TWO! Reynolds stands on Hook’s head, fans boo but the Dark Order and X-JAS soak up the heat. But Hook clinches! Reynolds fights with forearms, then he bumps Hook off buckles. Tag to Menard, he stomps Hook then lets off to distract the ref, Uno and Parker CHOKE Hook while Rampage goes picture in picture!
Menard stomps Hook, drags him up, and ROCKS him with a right. Menard pushes Hook around, soaks up the heat, but turns around into a CHOP! Menard trips Hook, drags him back, and tags Parker in. Parker CLUBS Hook down, then stomps him. Parker taunts the Best Friends, flicks his hair gel at them, then goes back to Hook. Parker CLUBS Hook, tags Uno, and they mug Hook some more. Uno scrapes his laces on Hook’s face then tags Parker back in. Parker stomps Hook, but Hook powers Parker back! They end up on ropes, Parker KNEES Hook back! Parker then BLASTS Cassidy off the corner!
Rampage returns to singe picture as Parker goes after Hook, and Hook gets around to NORTHERN LIGHTS! Parker tags Menard but Hook LARIATS Menard down! The fans fire up as Hook and Menard crawl, hot tags to Trent and Uno! Trent rallies on Uno, then on Reynolds! GERMAN SUPLEX! And then another GERMAN SUPLEX! Trent still has Reynolds but Reynolds fights the nelson. Uno runs in but Trent ducks, the BOOT hits Reynolds! Trent HALF ‘N’ HALF SUPLEXES Uno away! Trent runs in at Reynolds but into a BOOT! Reynolds goes up but Trent YANKS him down for a SAIDO! Fans fire up with Trent!
Trent tags Cassidy, and Cassidy storms up to “unleash.” But then he really does fire off BOOT after BOOT on Dark Order! Yuta sighs as this is typical Cassidy. Cassidy dodges the Dark Order’s double lariat to DOUBLE SHOTGUN! Cassidy kips up and the fans fire up! Cassidy ducks ‘n’ dodges and tilt-o-whirls, but Uno stops the DDT to suplex! Only to get STUN DOG MILLIONAIRE! Cassidy keeps moving but Uno BOOTS him! Uno hooks Cassidy up, for SOMETHING EVIL! Cover, Trent KNEES it apart! Fans fire up, Reynolds BOOTS Trent! Reynolds runs in to BOOT Cassidy in a corner! Reynolds puts Cassidy up top!
Reynolds ROCKS Cassidy, climbs up, but Trent runs up to get Reynolds! SUPER GERMAN SUPLEX! Fans fire up as Cassidy adjusts, and Danhausen tags in! But so does Menard! Menard says do NOT do what he thinks he’s gonna do! But then Danhausen CURSES him! And yes, the PURPLE HAT! Hager is pissed, Parker tries to calm him down, but then Hager runs in! Danhausen dodges, Trent & Cassidy dump Hager out! Menard grabs Danhausen, Parker runs in to get the hat back! But Hook gets Parker in the REDRUM!! Menard lets Danhausen go, but Danhausen rolls him up! BEST FRIENDS WIN!
Winners: Orange Cassidy, Hook, Danhausen & Trent Beretta, by pinfall
Not only is X-JAS furious, but Yuta says this is unbelievable. But will the Decoder have to worry about the much more Cold-Hearted Handsome Devil?
Backstage interview with The Outcasts & Anna Jay.
Renee Paquette is with Saraya, Ruby Soho & The Star of the Show to say they are teaming up for the first time in Six Woman Tag action. Saraya says yes they are, and sorry for cutting Renee off, Renee knows Saraya loves her, but… Isn’t Anna just the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen? Ruby sighs and Saraya says “Liza Minnelli” is in a time out so shush. Anyway, Saraya thanks Anna for teaming with them, Lord knows they’ve needed some extra help around here. And also, they do have something in common that is giant, greasy, irritating, and needs to be handled. Oh, speaking of, here it comes.
Parker walks in, apologizes for not being here sooner, and then says hi to Ruby. But uh, yeah, the guys are ready to go, they’ll be out there for her, team effort! Um, no, Anna doesn’t want the boys out there. Especially Parker. What? But Saraya says this is why she loves Anna! She’s great. Yeah, she is. Hey, no, stop looking at Ruby. Saraya drags Ruby along, leaving Parker alone. Will the X-JAS still even be the X-JAS anymore with all this drama?
Tony Schiavone is in the ring.
Schiavone says that 28 years ago, in this town, at the Mall of America, two men were in the main event for the very first wrestling match ever on TNT. It was Sting VS Ric Flair. And Schiavone wants to also say that the final match on TNT back then was Sting VS Ric Flair. So it gives Schiavone a sense of pride to welcome one of Minnesota’s favorite sons, as well as STIIIING~! The Icon makes his way out to the ring and fans howl for him. Schiavone then introduces the Nature Boy, the Minnesota native, Ric Flair! Fans “WOO~!” as Flair makes his way out now, and hugs Sting in the ring.
Schiavone has them bring it in. Wednesday night, they announced the location of Sting’s final match at AEW Revolution, March 3rd, 2024. It will be Greensboro, North Carolina, where these two set the standard for a great televised wrestling event. Sting stands at 24-0, the longest undefeated streak standing, and we’re just two weeks away from tickets going on sale. Sting asks to take the mic, and he howls for the fans! The fans howl back and Sting says Minneapolis, lots of great memories here! Not only did he and Ric do the first and last WCW shows on TNT here, but they did the very big, gigantic- Oh, can’t really say that on TV, sorry. Copyright and stuff.
But the massive match at Mall of America, everyone knows about it. Sting’s had great matches here against and with Lex Luger, Bam Bam Bigelow, and lots of other great memories. So good to be back. Thank you for those memories. Thank you, Tony Khan, Tony Schiavone and the Nature Boy! WOO~! Ric takes the mic now, and he says, “Wow. From 1972 ’til today. And believe it or not, I’m still alive. And that’s saying a lot, heh. Because I’ve covered a lot of ground and had a lot of fun. But there are three or four people that are always gonna be special in my life, and you’ll love these names.
“Dusty Rhodes, Ricky The Dragon, and a guy that I think I’ve wrestled at least 15 hundred times over our career, the great–and the word ‘Icon’ does not even enough to begin to say what a man he is. I’m so serious, to be back in my hometown in this moment, and this ride. This is an incredible ride. Think about the history of our business. I’ve been there with him since ’88, and I’m gonna be there with him in the end. And man, that doesn’t happen in real-life, guys. And y’know what? We’ve stayed as respectful and honest with each other as the day we met, and that’s really unusual. You’re the man, brother.”
Fans cheer, and Ric says, “We’re gonna dance all night and dance a little longer. We’re gonna stay up all night and stay a little longer. I cannot tell you where we’ll be at like the old days, but you know we’ll be going AEW strong! WOO~!” Fans echo “WOO~!” with Ric and Schiavone says Ric will be there for Sting at AEW Revolution, tickets on sale soon! The Icon and Nature Boy are riding off into the night, and we have the when and where. Now all we need is, who faces Sting in his final match?
Backstage interview with Hikaru Shida, Kris Statlander & Skye Blue.
Renee is now with the Shining Samurai, the Galaxy’s Greatest and Chicago Skye as she says a lot has changed in the AEW Women’s Division after Full Gear. Shida lost the AEW Women’s World Championship to Toni Storm, and Statlander lost the AEW TBS Championship to Julia Hart, the same match Skye Blue was in. Does tonight feel like a way to get momentum back? Kris says it has been a hard pill to swallow. “You work so hard for something, and you come back from multiple injuries, you come back and change yourself so many times, and you obtain something so precious, and it’s just taken away in a matter of seconds.”
And worse yet, Kris wasn’t the one who got pinned. Oh, okay, blame Skye when Kris had plenty of chances to win the Triple Threat, and didn’t. Shida tells them to stop. She also lost a title, she also feels angry, but not towards them. Not towards her partners. They can take their anger out on their opponents tonight! Kris agrees with that, and so does Skye. Will this trio of stars be able to bring down The Outcasts and Star of the Show?
The Don Callis Family VS JAH-C
So what if they lost the Like A Dragon Street Fight? “Powerhouse” Will Hobbs did damage to Paul “The Giant” Wight like no man has ever done before, and there’s still a lot left in the tank for Kyle Fletcher & Konosuke Takeshita. Will they only be made stronger from that loss?
The teams sort out, Hobbs starts and Jah throws hands! Hobbs doesn’t even flinch! Jah runs, but Hobbs CLOBBERS him! In runs ??? but Hobbs picks him up to SPINEBUSTER! D runs in but Hobbs SPINEBUSTERS him, too! Fletcher & Konosuke step in, they all get a man up, and in synchronized formation, we get the WORLD’S STRONGEST SLAM, GRIMSTONE and BASTARD DRIVER!! Cover, The Don Callis Family wins!
Winners: The Don Callis Family, by pinfall
Fans boo but Callis celebrates with his “family.” Then Callis gets a mic to talk. “Chris Jericho and Kenny Omega! The Golden Jets! You put two of the greatest of all time into a tag team and what do you got? You got a team that could be the most dominant of all time. And I know that wins and losses matter here in All Elite Wrestling. But in the Don Callis Family, the only thing that matters is winning! And whether it’s singles, tag, or trios, the Don Callis Family will continue dominating until there’s nowhere for the Golden Jets to hide in AEW!” The ultimatum has been issued, will it only be a matter of time before AEW belongs to the DCF?
Prince Nana & Brian Cage talk with The Workhorsemen.
Nana says it is an unbelievable time for the Mogul Embassy. Cage says it’s always a great time. Nana says the Gates of Agony are in NJPW World Tag League, killing it and bringing home that money. But tonight, Nana needs to hire some help, and that brings in JD Drake & Anthony Henry. Nana has been watching them, he likes their style. That is why tonight, he needs their services. And this could be a huge opportunity for you both to step up to the plate and to prove a point. To impress Swerve Strickland, too. So tonight, Nana’s paid them, get the job done, and we’ll see if they can join the team. But he believes in them!
Nana & Cage head out, will Scrap metal & The Saint of Augusta help The Machine bring down the luchador trio in tonight’s main event?
Six Woman Tag: Anna Jay & The Outcasts VS Hikaru Shida, Skye Blue & Kris Statlander!
Both sides have said what’s on their mind, but it’s the emotions in their hearts that could make or break these team-ups. Will Saraya be able to keep things together between Anna and Ruby? Or will it be Shida who struggles to keep Skye and Kris on the same page?
The teams sort out and Kris starts against Anna. The fans rally as the two circle, then tie up. Kris waistlocks, SLAMS Anna, then drags her up to tag Shida. The former champs double whip, sweep and ELBOW Anna down. Then they shake hands to DOUBLE ELBOW DROP! Shida covers, TWO! Tag to Skye and she wrenches Anna to a JAWBREAKER! Anna blocks the superkick but not the BASEMENT ROUNDHOUSE! Skye pushes Anna around, but Kris tags herself in. Skye lets that go, to then tag herself back in! But Kris tags back in again! They argue, but then Shida tags herself in to get them both to stop.
But then Anna hot tags Saraya! Saraya gets around Shida, Shida gets around Saraya, but Saraya mule kicks Shida! Saraya runs, but Shida ENZIGURIS first! Shida fires up, the fans are with her, and Shida torture racks! Saraya endures, but Ruby says put her down! So Shida DROPS Saraya! Ruby storms in but Shdia kicks her low, and snap suplexes her onto Saraya! Fans fire up as Shida covers Saraya, TWO! Shida tags Skye in and Skye keeps Saraya from her corner. Skye whips, runs up and SHINING WIZARD on the ropes! But Anna distracts the ref so Saraya can keep Skye stuck, and Ruby ROUNDHOUSES Skye down!
Fans boo but Saraya howls to the moon. Saraya stomps Skye, insults her, and whips her to the corner as Rampage goes picture in picture.
Saraya bumps Skye off buckles, lets off to distract the ref, and Ruby digs her boot in! Anna pulls Skye’s hair to help out, then Saraya storms up to bump Skye off buckles. Tag to Ruby, she stomps away on Skye, but lets off as the ref counts. Saraya tells fans to shut up while Ruby drags Skye around. Skye throws body shots, then JAWBREAKERS! Ruby staggers back, Saraya tags in, and the Outcasts mug Skye! Saraya has Skye in the ropes to throw knee after knee! The ref counts, Saraya lets off, and she pushes Skye back in. Saraya keeps Skye from her corner, taunting Shida and Kris, then she stomps Skye.
Saraya bumps Skye off buckles, tags Anna and Anna CHOKES Skye! The ref counts, Anna lets off, and then Anna CHOKES Skye on ropes! The ref counts again, Anna lets off and distracts the ref so Saraya can SLAP Skye. Anna bumps Skye off buckles, Ruby tags in, and Anna ROCKS Skye. Ruby CHOPS Skye, stalks her to a corner, and stands her up, but Skye avoids the chop to CHOP! And CHOP! And CHOP! Skye and Ruby sputter and drop to their knees while Rampage goes to break.
Rampage returns and hot tag to Kris! She BLASTS Ruby, drags Saraya up and FISHERMAN BUSTERS! Cover, but Anna kicks it apart! Anna drags Saraya back and tags herself in. Anna stands Kris up, wrenches and HOOK KICKS! Then Saraya KNEES Kris down! Cover, TWO! Anna drags Kris up, QUEENSLAYER SLEEPER! But Kris powers up to back suplex free! Ruby runs in, STO! Skye SUPERKICKS Ruby! Saraya YAKUZA KICKS Skye! Shida ROCKS Saraya, whips her but Saraya reverses, only for Shida to JUMP KNEE! Anna BOOTS Shida! Kris runs up, but into a COMPLETE SHOT! Anna tags Ruby and they get Kris up.
Anna HOOK KICKS, then Ruby SUPERKICKS but Kris pulls Anna into it! Ruby panics, Kris tags Skye and Electric Chair Lifts Ruby! SLAM and CODE BLUE!! Cover, Skye’s team wins!
Winners: Hikaru Shida, Skye Blue & Kris Statlander, by pinfall
The dysfunction wasn’t enough to bring down Skye and Kris, they made it work and now celebrate together! As for Anna, she is furious with Ruby, and Saraya pulls Ruby along like an angry mother with her daughter. Are the Outcasts going to be on the outs sooner rather than later?
BREAKING NEWS for Dynamite!
Firstly, the Continental Classic continues, and the Gold League’s third round has been set: Jon Moxley VS Rush; Jay White VS Jay Lethal; and Swerve Strickland VS Mark Briscoe! Will El Toro Blanco be the one to serve The Maniac that first L in the tournament? Will Lethal and Briscoe finally get on the board?
And after being the one to score the pinfall in tonight’s Six Woman Tag, Skye Blue gets her shot at “Timeless” Toni Storm and the AEW Women’s World Championship! Will Skye finally make it through the Storm to grab the gold on the other side?
Six Man Tag: Penta El Zero Miedo, El Hijo Del Vikingo & Komander w/ Alex Abrahantes VS Brian Cage & The Workhorsemen w/ Prince Nana!
While the AEW World Trios Champions, Billy Gunn & The Acclaimed, are down and out, trios are forming and fighting their way up. Alex Abrahantes’ league of luchadores want their shot, but will they make it through a Rampage? Or will The Mogul Embassy learn that having #CeroMiedo is priceless?
The trios sort out, and Cage starts against Komander. Cage kicks Komander low right at the bell, then whips him to ropes. Komander handsprings, Cage dodges but Komander dodges back, then RAN- NO, Cage blocks that to pop Komander up! But Komander sunset flips! Cage drags Kmoander up to OVERHEAD SUPLEX! Penta tags in, then GAMANGIRIS Cage! Penta goes up to CROSSBODY! And then he dodges to SUPERKICK! Henry tags in, bobs ‘n’ weaves and fires off hands. Henry gets around to make Penta kneel, and he DROPKICKS Penta away! Henry soaks up the jeers, but Penta tags Vikingo!
Viking springboards to MISSILE DROPKICK Henry! Fans fire up as Vikingo then whips Henry corner to corner. Henry reverses, but Vikingo reverses back to HEEL KICK! Vikingo forearm smashes int he corner, goes up and fans rally, for the IMPLODER DRAGON-RANA! And then the DREAMCAST KICK! JD tags in and fans rally up. JD says “SUCK IT!” and then dares Vikingo to chop him. Vikingo winds up as fans chant “SI! SI! SI!” CHOP! JD nods, but he wants another. Vikingo CHOPS again, and JD huffs and puffs. JD swings, Vikingo ducks ‘n’ dodges but JD CHOPS Vikingo down after all!
JD then powers Vikingo to ropes to BIEL him across the way! JD taunts Penta, whips Vikingo, but Vikingo ducks ‘n’ dodges again to CORKCCREW RANA! JD flounders out, Cage and Henry run in, but Penta & Komander SUPERKICK them first! Henry bails out, Penta gives Komander a boost, saluting MISSILE DROPKICK! Cage tumbles out, fans rally as the luchadores coordinate, and “CERO! MIEDO!” TRIPLE DIVES!! Some cleaner than others, and JD pops Vikingo back up to CLOBBER him off the ropes! Komander stomps Cage, and puts him in the ring as Rampage goes picture in picture.
Komander hurries in, Penta BOOTS JD to join Komander. But Henry trips Komander! Penta runs up, SUPERKICKS Henry, then makes sure he knows, “CERO! MIEDO!” Penta runs but into a SPIN POWERSLAM! Cage drags Komander up for a deadlift SUPERPLEX!! Cage flexes, Henry & JD join in, and then JD stalks Komander. JD drags Komander up, DECKS him, then stalks him to ropes. JD puts Komander in the corner, CHOPS, and then tags Henry. The Workhorsemen mug Komander, Henry throws body shots, then he runs in to forearm smash! JD tags, LARIAT, NECK TWIST and SLINGSHOT SENTON!
Nana likes what he sees as Komander writhes. JD drags Komander up, keeps him from the lucha corner, and he CLUBS Komander back down. JD drags Komander up to scoop and SLAM! JD goes up a corner, to then VADER FLOP as Komander moves! Henry tags in, he drags Komander from the corner, then ducks the enziguri! But Komander rolls free and hot tags Vikingo! Vikingo springboards to CROSSBODY! Vikingo SOBATS Henry, runs but into a cheap shot from Cage! The ref reprimands but Henry throws Vikingo down by his hair! NECK TWIST! And a headscissor squeeze, even!
Henry lets off to then stand Vikingo up, for another NECK TWIST! Tag to Cage and he RAMS Vikingo into a corner! And again! And then he CHOPS! Cage wrenches Vikingo, scoops him, and does bicep curls before he FALL AWAY SLAMS Vikingo! Cage flexes, taunts Cero Miedo, and he drags Vikingo up to GERMAN SUPLEX! Vikingo lands on his feet! Vikingo waistlocks, Cage elbows free then whips Vikingo to ropes. But Vikingo slides under, only to get caught! But Vikingo then PELES! Hot tag to Penta as Rampage returns to single picture! Penta dodges Cage to then SLINGBLADE Cage down! SLINGEBLADE again!
The Workhorsemen attack, double whip, but Penta KICKS JD and SUPERKICKS Henry! Penta runs in to wheelbarrow Cage, victory roll and DOUBLE DDT on the Workhorsemen! Fans fire up and Penta SUPERKICKS Cage! Tag to Komander and he goes up top to MISSILE DROPKICK JD! Penta hauls Henry up, ALLEY-OOP into a MISSILE DROPKICK from Vikingo!! Fans lose their minds over that one, and then Penta sets up so Komander can use him as a step, HANGTIME DROPKICK on JD in a corner! Cage staggers up, Penta has his target, SUPERKICK! Komander springboards, FLYIGN CODE BREAKER! And he holds on for Vikingo to DOUBLE STOMP Cage!
Penta goes up, “CERO! MIEDO!” DIVING DOUBLE STOMPS of his own! Cover, TWO!! Cage survives because he’s a Machine! But Abrahantes rallies the fans for his team. Penta hauls Cage up, reels him in, “CERO! MIEDO!” But Cage wrenches out to JUMP KNEE! Penta falls into the tag with Komander, and Komander springboards, but Cage SWATS him! Cage whips Komander to the corner, tags Henry, and Cage runs up to MONKEY FLIP Komander into JD’s POWERBOMB!! Then JD CATAPULTS Kmoander into Henry’s SUPERKICK! Henry goes up, DIVING DOUBLE STOMP BACKBREAKER of their own! Cover, Vikingo breaks it!!
JD TOSSES Vikingo, Penta SUPERKICKS JD! Cage fireman’s carries Penta for F10! Vikingo returns with a springboard, FLYING TORNADO DDT!! Henry is back, he steps over and reels Vikingo in, PILEDRIVER! But Penta catches Henry now, half nelson, pump handle, MADE IN JAPAN!! JD is up, Penta kicks but JD blocks it! JD has Penta for the underhooks, the SILENCER! Komander returns, JD ducks his roundhouse but not the HEEL KICK! But Cage waistlocks Komander! Komander fights with elbows, but Henry runs up! Komander ducks, the ENZIGURI hits Cage! Nana is furious, and Cage CLOBBERS Henry!!
Nana says no more, they’re done. JD asks what the hell, but Cage shoves JD. Vikingo DREAMCAST KICKS JD! The Embassy is leaving, they don’t want to hire Workhorsemen anymore? Well Penta says “CERO! MIEDO!” and FEAR FACTOR!! Komander is up top, he tags Vikingo before giving Henry CIELITO LINDO! Komander DIVES onto JD! Vikingo adds on the 630 SENTON!! Cover, the luchadores win!
Winners: Penta El Zero Miedo, Komander & El Hijo Del Vikingo, by pinfall
The implosion of Nana’s team all over a misunderstanding gives Penta’s team their first victory together! Will Penta, Komander y Vikingo take this momentum to next beat Action Andretti & Top Flight?
A really good Rampage here with a lot of tag team action. There must be something in Cassidy’s contract about opening shows, though, because that 8 Man Tag certainly felt main event worthy. But then it made sense in story that it had to go first so that the X-JAS could be in action before Anna, and Anna would tell Parker to stay in the back during her match because of how Ruby would be involved. Great win for Cassidy’s team, and great win for the Faces in the Women’s Trios match. Rather surprised Skye is getting her shot at Storm so soon. Yes, she interrupted Storm’s acceptance speech moment, and won here, but why not give us a promo segment between them first, then the match on Winter is Coming. But at the same time, debut in Montreal, they want it to be important.
Of course Don Callis Family squashes jobbers, but I like that we got to see Hobbs, Konosuke and Fletcher all in red ring gear. And seeing Don Callis’ Last Supper parody, it makes me think he wants a total of 11 faction members. I say 11 because “Judas” is already accounted for in Jericho. So far, he has five, Callis really is gonna have to recruit tag teams and/or trios if he wants an easier time of filling out the group. Really good main event from Penta’s team going against Cage & Workhorsemen. Of course the Faces win, but also it was clear the Workhorsemen were going to take the loss for the Heels. Kinda wished Cage would beat down the Workhorsemen after the loss, not because of the “misunderstanding” trope, but that’d probably take away from the Faces celebrating.
And given Rampage is prerecorded, turns out that was for the best this week. I’d only just heard today about how… controversial Ric Flair got in his part of the promo segment. Flair also tweeted about it, both apologizing and not apologizing for what he said. This is gonna be a long three months if everyone has to worry about Flair spouting off the stuff he got away with in the 1980s when he was much, MUCH younger. That aside, the entire segment was redundant anyway, we heard them talk on Dynamite, this is the same crowd that heard it all, it’s just a waste of time.
My Score: 8.5/10
Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (12/1/23)
SmackDown hears voices!
The Viper is here for The Bloodline!
He returned at WarGames, he returned to Monday Night Raw, and now, The Apex Predator, Randy Orton, returns to Friday Night SmackDown! Will he be able to strike at The Bloodline tonight?
- Pete Dunne VS Bobby Lashley w/ The Street Profits; Lashley wins.
- Santos Escobar VS Joaquin Wilde; Santos wins.
- Kevin Owens VS Grayson Waller w/ Austin Theory; Kevin wins.
- Bianca Belair w/ Charlotte Flair & Shotzi Blackheart VS Kairi Sane w/ DMG CTRL; Bianca wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
Bianca Belair is here!
Brooklyn cheers The EST as she skips to the ring, her team victorious against Damage Control in WarGames! After a recap package, fans chant for Bianca and she gets the mic to say, “Man, it is so cool to be in one of the best boroughs in one of the greatEST cities in the world, Brooklyn!” The fans cheer that! Bianca says DMG CTRL really tried to take them out, but her team did what needed to be done. So shout out to Becky Lynch for coming through, showing up and showing out. Shout out to Shotzi for her guts and passion. And shoutout to Charlotte Flair for being a bigger person and making that call to Becky.
“Now while it feels great to be standing in this ring and celebrating that W from WarGames, my war with DMG CTRL, it ain’t over~! Cuz Iyo Sky, I’m still coming for you, cuz I want my title back!” Fans also cheer that. But speaking of Iyo, here she comes! The Evil Genius leads DMG CTRL out, though where’s Bayley? That aside, Dakota Kai is the one to tell Bianca, “It’s really great how uh, you can get all of these people to cheer for you.” The fans boo her but Dakota tells them to shut up! Dakota says just earlier, Iyo was saying how gross it is here in Brooklyn! It smells! Who would want to live here?!
DMG CTRL slide into the ring, and Dakota says Iyo was also saying that Bianca is in way over her head, dude. Iyo already beat Bianca twice. So… if Bianca wants to get yet another shot, she’ll have to go through all of DMG CTRL. Well that ain’t nothing new. So who wants it first, huh? But wait! Here come Charlotte & Shotzi to back Bianca up! Fans cheer as Charlotte says “Ladies~…! Bianca isn’t the only one coming for you. And I’d love to go through all of DMG CTRL.” Shotzi says it seems to her that there’s enough DMG CTRL to go around. They rush in, and the brawl is on! Fans fire up but Iyo TOSSES Bianca and helps Asuka against Charlotte!
Shotzi and Kairi brawl in a corner, Bianca returns, Charlotte BOOTS Asuka way while Bianca RAMS Iyo into a corner! Bianca stomps Iyo down, Charlotte helps Shotzi with Kairi, and Charlotte sets Kairi up for Shotzi’s BOOT! Iyo ends up isolated, and Bianca hits a SPINEBUSTER! Iyo scrambles out, DMG CTRL regroups, are their days on top numbered?
DMG CTRL regroups backstage.
And Bayley is confused as to what’s going on. Iyo angrily asks where Bayley was but Bayley says no one told her they were going out there! Maybe if she knew, things would’ve been different! The joshi talk in Japanese, Dakota cools it off. What matters is that Kairi is facing Bianca tonight. No one knows Bianca better than Bayley so Kairi would appreciate the help. Kairi says yes, they’re “tomodachi <friends>,” that’d be appreciated. Bayley says okay, but are they really Bayley’s friends?
Pete Dunne VS Bobby Lashley w/ The Street Profits!
With Sheamus recovering from injury and Ridge Holland just ditching him last week, The Bruiserweight is all alone against The All Mighty! Will Dunne stand a chance against the overwhelming strength of Bobby Lashley?
SmackDown returns and Lashley makes his entrance, Montez Ford & Angelo Dawkins by his side. But before the bell, Lashley gets a mic to say “Hey, listen, kid. When I told you to make a name for yourself…” The fans chant “BOBBY! BOBBY!” and Lashley says that’s a name. Does Dunne know what Lashley can do to him? Lashley will break Dunne into pieces! Is Dunne ready for that? Dunne SLAPS Lashley! Fans fire up, Lashley grins, and the bell rings. Dunne then BOOTS Lashley! And BOOTS! And fires off furious fists! Lashley carries Dunne to then TOSS him! Dunne flounders but also snarls. Dunne swipes at the Profits, but Lashley run sin to CLOBBER him!
Lashley whips Dunne hard into buckles, then storms around. The Profits high-five Lashley and Brooklyn is behind him as he stands Dunne up for haymakers! Lashley smothers Dunne in the corner, lets off to whip corner to corner, then storms up on Dunne. Lashley digs hands into Dunne’s face, the ref counts and Lashley lets off. Lashley runs in but Dunne BOOTS again! Dunne runs up to DROPKICK Lashley out of the ring! Fans are torn as Dunne goes out to FLYING KNEE! Lashley staggers back, Dunne sets up to MOONSAULT! Down goes Lashley and Dunne hurries back up! Dunne ARIHARA MOONSAULTS! Down goes Lashley and fans fire up as SmackDown goes to break!
SmackDown returns and Lashley clotheslines Dunne in a corner! Lashley then brings Dunne around to snap suplex! Dunne writhes, Lashley paces around him and the fans cheer. Lashley drags Dunne up, suplexes again, and this time he holds Dunne up! Dunne throws knees, gets free, and he runs, ducks ‘n’ dodges, but Lashley hits a MILE HIGH SPINEBUSTER! Fans fire up again and Lashley drags Dunne up. Lashley TOSSES Dunne out, storms out after him, and then drags Dunne up again. Fans cheer as Lashley fireman’s carries Dunne, to then POST Dunne! The Profits say this is an extended Black Friday!
Lashley puts Dunne in, Dunne crawls away but Lashley aims. Lashley runs in, but Dunne sends the Spear into the POST! Lashley staggers back, the Profits coach him up, but Dunne GAMANGIRIS! Dunne runs up to ENZIGURI! Lashley ends up in a corner, Dunne GAMANGIRIS again! And again! Dunne KICKS and KICKS and KICKS, then pushes Lashley out so he can go up. Dunne DOUBLE STOMPS an arm! Dunne bends the fingers, isolates the arm, and STOMPS the arm! Lashley grits his teeth but Dunne reels him in. ASAI DDT! Cover, TWO! Lashley is tougher than that but Dunne keep son him with HAMMER ‘N’ ANVIL ELBOWS!
But Lashley fights up! Fireman’s carry, then an adjustment, for the OKLAHOMA STAMPEDE! Cover, TWO!! Dunne survives and Lashley is annoyed. Ford says yeah, Dunne’s got heart, but that’s about it. Lashley hauls Dunne up but Dunne SLAPS him! Lashley LARIATS Dunne inside out! Lashley then drags Dunne up, MILE HIGH- ENZIGURI! Dunne gets up, Lashley SPEARS him back down!! Cover, Lashley wins!
Winner: Bobby Lashley, by pinfall
The Bruiserweight put up a fight, but Lashley is still Lashley. Will The All Mighty soon head for a title as we head for the New Year?
Paul Heyman walks into Nick Aldis’ office.
The Wise Man seems rather indignant looking at the SmackDown General Manager. Heyman then dusts off the New York Jets NFL Legacy belt before speaking. “Did you invite Randy Orton to SmackDown tonight?” Aldis says yes, he did. And Aldis intends to sign Randy to a SmackDown exclusive superstar contract tonight. Heyman looks around and asks if the Tribal Chief knows about this. Aldis says Heyman has forgotten that there are countless memos: All communication to Roman Reigns must go through Paul Heyman. So consider this a communication to Roman: Aldis WILL sign Randy to SmackDown.
And if Aldis has to offer up the entire Bloodline as leverage, so be it. So the question to Heyman is… “What’re you gonna do about it?” Heyman says, “Anything it takes.” Heyman gets on his phone to call Roman Reigns. But is there nothing that can stop The Viper from finally being within striking distance of The Tribal Chief?
Backstage interview with Pete Dunne.
Kayla Braxton says he lost to Lashley, but she wants to talk about last week. Why did Ridge walk out on him? Dunne says he doesn’t know. And he doesn’t care. Because right now isn’t about the Brutes, it’s about Dunne! He is going to focus on himself. He is here to fight, and he will fight anyone! But in walk Pretty Deadly. They say this is so tough. But don’t be sad, use this as a learning opportunity. Sometimes, being abandoned can help you find your own path. Even if that path, like Dunne’s career, hits a dead end. Dunne HITS them! Dunne fires off but that’s 2v1 and Pretty Deadly turns it around! They TOSS Dunne into a road case!
How’s that, Butch?! HUH!? You’re alone! ALONE! And always will be! Elton Prince & Kit Wilson have numbers on their side, but will Dunne still get revenge?
Backstage interview with Santos Escobar.
Cathy Kelley says given his recent history with the LWO, what can we expect in his match with Joaquin Wilde here? Santos says he’s only trying to finish what Rey started. Rey turned his back on the LWO when he chose Carlito over Santos. And now Santos’ own brothers in arms are blinded by their hero, not seeing that Rey will do the same to them. Cruz is still recovering from the last time he tried standing up to Santos. And if Wilde can’t see the truth, Santos will put him on the shelf, too. The Emperor of Lucha is becoming a tyrant, but will he be unstoppable in destroying what he helped create?
Santos Escobar VS Joaquin Wilde!
SmackDown returns and Wilde makes his entrance. The bell rings and Wilde DROPKICKS Santos! And DROPKICKS again! Then kips up and ROCKS Santos with haymakers! Fans fire up, Wilde whips and ELBOWS Santos down! Then drops an elbow! Santos bails out but Wilde PLANCHAS out onto him! Fans fire up again and Wilde CLUBS Santos. Wilde puts Santos in the ring, then aims again, but Santos bails out! Fans boo but Wilde just goes to the corner! Springboard CANNONBALL! Direct hit and the fans fire up all over again! Wilde snarls and he puts Santos back in. Cover, TWO! Wilde keeps on Santos with a shove.
Wilde then goes up a corner, but Santos sweeps the legs! Wilde tumbles down, Santos stomps away and RAMS Wilde into a corner. Santos puts Wilde in the Tree of Woe, goes to the far side and runs in, DROPKICK! Wilde falls out of the Tree, Santos snapmares to cover, TWO! Santos is annoyed but he CLUBS away on Wilde’s chest! Santos rips up the LWO shirt! Fans boo but Santos throws the shirt away. Santos drags Wilde up, CLUBS him, then clamps onto an arm with a cording hold. Wilde endures, Santos talks trash that HE is the LWO, but the fans rally up. Wilde fights up to his feet, throws knees, but Santos whips Wilde away.
Santos storms up, Wilde ELBOWS him, then bumps Santos off buckles. Wilde fires haymakers again, then whips. Santos reverses but Wilde ducks ‘n ‘dodges to dropkick a leg out! Fans rally up behind Wilde and he runs up to KNEE Santos down! Wilde roars and fans are with him! Wilde runs back in, SOMERSAULT SATELLITE DDT!! Cover, TWO!! Santos survives and Wilde grows frustrated. Wilde hurries back to a corner to aim again. Wilde runs in, into a SUPERKICK! Santos says this is what happens when you cross him! Fireman’s carry, and “This is for YOU, Rey!” PHANTOM DRIVER!! Cover, Santos wins!
Winner: Santos Escobar, by pinfall
But Santos isn’t done sending his message! He beats down Wilde with fists, the ref tells him to stop, but Santos refuses! So here comes Dragon Lee! The Boy Wonder may have lost at Survivor Series but he won’t let Santos just do what he wants! Santos bails out, he did what he wanted. Wait, he slithers back in! But Dragon is ready and fires haymakers on him! Dragon whips, Santos reverses but Dragon RANAS! Santos ends up in a corner, Dragon JUMP KICKS, leg sweeps, and SWINGING DROPKICK! Combinacion Dragon hits, and fans fire up! Dragon aims again, BULL’S HORNS!! Santos flounders away, is his fight with Dragon far from over?
Nick Aldis greets Logan Paul backstage.
The Maverick is her with his United States Championship, ready to make his first appearance on SmackDown. What will the ImPAULsive Influencer have to say about being United States Champion? We find out, after the break.
Adam Pearce visits Nick Aldis in his office.
And the Raw GM asks the SmackDown GM to tell him the rumor isn’t true. Is Aldis trying to get a Raw Legend out from under Pearce’s nose? Aldis tells Pearce that Randy is a free agent now. But yes, Aldis does intend to sign Orton right here tonight in that ring. Is that so? Yeah, Pearce had his chance on Monday. Don’t worry about what happened on Monday. If Aldis is going to the ring with a contract, Pearce will join him. Pearce also has a contract folder! Nice office, by the way. Pearce heads out, who wins the signature of the Legend Killer?
Logan Paul heads to the ring!
Brooklyn is a little torn on seeing the Maverick in person, though probably because he needed brass knuckles to load his already titanium reinforced hand to beat Rey Mysterio. But Logan gets the mic to say, “To every friend who stabbed me in the back, to every hater who preyed on my downfall, I’ve got a question: WHERE ARE YOU NOW?!” He doesn’t understand. Don’t they get it by n ow? The more they hope he fails, the harder he works. And the harder he works, the more he wins. And the more he wins, the more he gets to stand up here and bark back!
And to all the jealous superstars backstage mad at him because they’ve been doing this their whole life while he’s the fastest rising superstar in history, you want the US Championship? Of course you do! It has been on his junk, just like y’all have since he got here! But a champ is only as good as his challengers, and since Rey is hurt, Logan can’t give him the rematch he was so excited for. So good news! Logan spoke with Aldis, and they have created a tournament to determine his next challenger. It starts next week, featuring eight superstars!
Santos Escobar, Dragon Lee, Karrion Kross, an NXT superstar to still be determined, Bobby Lashley, Grayson Waller, Austin Theory, and of course Kevin Owens. And Logan guarantees whoever wins this will have a nightmare trying to take this title from him. But wait, speaking of! Here comes Kevin Owens! Brooklyn fires up for The Prizefighter as he heads right for the ring. Kevin gets himself a mic and he says if Logan wants to talk about a nightmare, this, Logan Paul in the ring, is a nightmare. The first time Kevin ever saw Logan was 10 years ago on that app, Vine. And back then, it only took Kevin those six seconds to realize Logan is an unbearable jackass.
Fans cheer in agreement, and Kevin says if we’re talking about “junk,” the only junk is that crap drink Logan peddles. And now, guess what? Kevin is here to tell us that if he’s in the tournament, the nightmare will end. Logan’s days as champion will be numbered. That’s funny. Kevin calls himself a prizefighter, but Logan’s been in the ring with the greatest boxers in the world. If these two were to fight, six seconds is five more than Logan needs to KO KO. Kevin will never take this away from Logan: he’s very clever. But the thing is, that’s another world. This ring, the WWE Universe, it’s Kevin’s world, understand?
Logan says we’ll see about that. But then here comes Grayson Waller & Austin Theory! Logan smiles because it’s like looking in a mirror as these two walk down here. And Waller tells Logan he is better than this. He doesn’t need to talk with Kevin, Kevin is a troll looking for attention. He isn’t a forward thinking disruptor like the three of them. They have a lot in common, really. A-Town Down Under get in the ring, and Kevin says he loves punching people in the face. Look who he is in the ring with: Logan Paul is a man who knocks people out. So after Logan is done knocking Kevin out, maybe Kevin’s days of punching people- KEVIN DECKS THEORY!
Fans fire up as Theory tumbles out, and Waller goes to check on his buddy. Logan and Kevin drop their mics, stare down, and fans fire up as Kevin dares Logan to make the first move. Logan says worry about Waller first. Will Kevin give us a preview of the US Championship Contender’s Tournament? We find out after the break!
Kevin Owens VS Grayson Waller w/ Austin Theory!
SmackDown returns and Logan is sticking around to be on commentary for this one. Logan says he is like a proud father watching his sons on the playground. The bell rings, Waller bails out and regroups with Theory. Kevin goes out to ROCK Waller! And CHOP him! And then SMACK Waller off the desk! The ring count climbs, Kevin throws hands and he puts Waller in the ring. The ref makes sure Theory stays back, but then Waller stomps away on Kevin. Waller talks trash, UPPERCUTS Kevin, but Kevin CHOPS back! Waller kicks low, CLUBS Kevin on the neck, then cravats him into the ropes! The ref counts, Waller lets off.
Waller whips, Kevin reverses and CLOBBERS Waller! Then SENTONS! Fans rally, Kevin runs in at the corner and he clotheslines! Kevin then goes corner to corner, but Waller gets up to BOOT him! Waller LEG LARIATS! Waller rains down fists, then talks trash. Logan isn’t sure how well Kevin is built for this. Waller throws hands again, Logan denies knowing anything about brass knuckles, and Waller goes along the ropes. BALLER ELBOW! Cover, TWO! Kevin SLAPS Waller! And SLAPS him again! Waller BOOTS Kevin down! Waller snarls, drags Kevin up, but Kevin fights the suplex! The fans rally, Kevin suplexes Waller up and over!
Kevin glares at Logan, then CHOPS Waller! And CHOPS again! Kevin fakes the chop to then poke Waller in the eye! Kevin goes corner to corner, but then Waller bails out! No cannonball here and fans boo. Kevin goes out after Waller but Waller ROCKS him first! And SMACKS Kevin off the desk! Logan holds onto his Prime to make sure it doesn’t spill. Waller gets in the ring, builds speed and slides, but Kevin avoids the lariat to DECK Waller! Kevin gets on the apron, to FROG SPLASH to the floor! Fans fire up with Kevin while the ring count climbs. Kevin goes out after Waller again, but Waller RAMS him into steel steps!
Waller gets in to distract the ref, Theory STOMPS Kevin’s hand on the steps! Theory signals that to Waller and Waller stomps that arm! Waller slides out to then SLAM the arm into the post! Fans boo as A-Town Down Under high-five, and SmackDown goes to break.
SmackDown returns again and Kevin hits a FROG SPLASH in the ring! Fans fire up again while both men are down. Kevin shakes the bad hand out while Waller goes to the corner. Kevin storms up but Waller hits the bad hand! Then ARMBAR DDT! Waller hammerlocks that arm, then hits a ROLLING SNAP on the arm! Waller traps that arm in a double wristlock but Kevin endures. The fans rally, Kevin fights up, and he throws body shots with the good hand. Fans cheer, Kevin throws Waller out, but Waller grabs at Kevin’s bad hand. HOTSHOT on that arm! SOMERSAULT STUN- NO, atomic drop first! And then a DDT!
Fans fire up as Kevin evens things out. Kevin goes to ropes, drags himself up, but Waller runs up. Kevin blocks to HEADBUTT, CHOP and CHOP! Then a forearm! But that’s the bad arm! Waller runs in, Kevin dodges and SUPERKICKS! Waller is in the corner, Kevin runs in to CANNONBALL! Kevin goes up the corner again, SWANTON BOMB! Cover, TWO!! Waller survives and Theory rubs it in that it was just a two. Kevin keeps his focus, kicks low, but Waller grabs the bad arm to stop the stunner! Waller STOMPS the fingers! FUJIWARA ARMBAR! Kevin endures, fights around, but Waller twists the wrist!
Kevin keeps fighting, reaches out, and ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Waller lets go at 4. Waller has Kevin in the corner, puts the bad hand inside a buckle pad, and then runs up to PUNT only buckle! Kevin rolls Waller up, KEVIN WINS!
Winner: Kevin Owens, by pinfall
Logan can’t even! Kevinn pulled off a minor miracle, can he do that all over again in the opening round of this coming tournament?
BREAKING NEWS for next week!
CM Punk will show up on Friday Night SmackDown in Providence, Rhode Island! What more will the returning Best in the World have to say about “coming home” to the WWE?
Bianca Belair w/ Charlotte Flair & Shotzi Blackheart VS Kairi Sane w/ DMG CTRL!
The Evil Genius said The EST will have to not just earn her rematch for the title, she’ll have to get through everyone in DMG CTRL first! Bianca said bet, but will she be able to sink the Pirate Princess? Or will Bayley’s tips help Kairi end the series before it begins?
SmackDown returns and DMG CTRL has a pep talk backstage. Dakota asks if Bayley is okay. Yeah, yeah, she’s good. Go, Kairi. Dakota says Bayley doesn’t seem like herself, and then Iyo says Bayley will stay backstage tonight. Bayley ends up the odd one out as the others make their entrance, what is that about? But that aside, the bell rings and the fans rally up for Bianca. Bianca and Kairi circle, approach, but Kairi dodges. They tie up, Bianca puts Kairi in a corner but Kairi dodges to KICK a leg! Kairi goes to roll up but Bianca stays up! Then Bianca handsprings free, and she runs Kairi over! Bianca dusts off her hands, then keeps moving.
Kairi drops, Bianca handsprings over her, and then runs her over again! Bianca wags her fingers, then drags Kairi up. Kairi throws body shots, but Bianca blocks the whip! Bianca reverses, Kairi uses ropes to go up and RANA, but Bianca handsprings through to DROPKICK! Fans fire up while Bianca eggs Kairi on. Bianca stands Kairi up, scoops her, but Kairi fights free! Kairi grabs the braid, but Bianca uses that to reel Kairi in and DECK her! Bianca runs, but Asuka trips her up while the ref is checking Kairi! Kairi fires off on Bianca while fans boo, and Kairi SLAPS Bianca! DMG CTRL taunts Bianca, Kairi runs, but Charlotte trips her!
Btu the ref SAW Charlotte do it! So the ref EJECTS Charlotte and Shotzi! Fans boo but then Asuka is caught slithering in! So the ref EJECTS DMG CTRL! Now all things are equal and that doesn’t sit well with DMG CTRL! Asuka protests but Bianca DROPKICKS her down! Kairi goes after Bianca, shoves her to a corner, but Bianca shoves Kairi! The EST and Pirate Princess stare down as SmackDown goes to break.
SmackDown returns again and Kairi has Bianca down with the ANCHOR HOLD! Bianca endures as Kairi bridges back, but then Bianca powers Kairi away! Bianca runs in, but gets POST! Kairi AX KICKS Bianca down, covers, TWO! Kairi stays on Bianca with a chinlock, then gets the arms for a straitjacket stretch. Bianca endures, fans rally up, and Bianca fights to her feet. Kairi ends up a backpack , but Bianca powers up to arm-drag Kairi away! Bianca eggs Kairi on, then scoops her to SLAM her! Fans fire up as Bianca scoops and SLAMS again! Bianca huffs and puffs and whips Kairi to a corner! Bianca storms up to then climb up, and she rains down fists!
The fans cheer and count along, Bianca goes all the way to TEN! Then she backflips away, Kairi runs in into a SPINEBUSTER! Bianca runs, handspring MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO!! Kairi escapes and Bianca can’t believe it. But Bianca then drags Kairi up to a fireman’s carry. Kairi fights free, waistlocks, and they go to ropes. Bianca bucks the O’Conner, scoops Kairi again, and SLAMS her! Cover, TWO! Bianca stands Kairi up but Kairi URAKENS! Bianca goes to the corner, Kairi screams and marches to the far side. Fans boo as she runs back in, SLIDING D! Kairi pushes Bianca out, goes to the top, FLYING KABUKI ELBOW! Cover, TWO!
Bianca is reminding us she’s the toughEST and that makes Kairi mad. Kairi storms up to URA- NO, Bianca blocks and chicken wings! But Kairi victory rolls to send Bianca right out! Kairi then goes to the apron, runs in, but Bianca avoids the elbow to chicken wing! GlamEST Slam on the barriers! Fans fire up as Bianca puts Kairi in, but wait! Bayley sneaks out here! She grabs the braid and YANKS Bianca down! The ref notices Bayley now and is confused, but he did eject the others, not her. Kairi and Bayley high five and then Kairi climbs. Kairi prepares that elbow, but Bianca ROCKS her first!
Bianca drags Kairi off the corner into the torture rack! Bayley freaks out for the KISS OF DEATH!! Cover, Bianca wins!!
Winner: Bianca Belair, by pinfall
Bayley has no words as her help had no effect! Bianca can check Kairi off the list and she continues on, who will she look to take down next?
BREAKING NEWS for the United States Championship Contender’s Tournament!
Our first two opening round matches are set! Dragon Lee and Santos Escobar get to run it back from Survivor Series while Bobby Lashley and Karrion Kross clash for the first time in the WWE! The special Tribute to the Troops edition of SmackDown is the perfect place to start this tournament, but who will move on to the second round?
Nick Aldis and Adam Pearce are both in the ring.
The General Managers are both here, and Aldis says “Ladies and gentlemen, as your General Manager, it is my distinct honor and privilege to welcome back to SmackDown, the Viper, Randy…! Orton…!” The fans fire up as Randy indeed makes his way to the ring, and he looks just as happy to be back! Orton joins Aldis and Pearce in the ring, strikes his pose on the corner, then revels in the fans chanting his name. Randy gets so fired up, he throws his vest off! Pearce says this is electric, but Aldis says, “How dare you interrupt me on MY show!” Pearce says Aldis better calm down. Randy is a Raw legend, that is where he belongs.
But Aldis can give Randy the one thing he wants, right here on SmackDown. Pearce knows what Aldis is getting at, and counter offers with a World Heavyweight Championship opportunity. Randy is rather taken aback, but Aldis says he can give Randy the guys who took him out. But “Ladies and gentlemen, things that live in Brooklyn,” here comes Paul Heyman. And he serves as the Wise Man to Your REIGNING! DEFENDING! UNDISPUTED! WWE UNIVERSAL HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION…! Roman… Reigns. And look who’s back. “After 18 months on the shelf, thanks to Roman Reigns and The Bloodline, Randy Orton comes home looking for revenge.”
But there will be no RKOs this evening, and there will be no decision made by Randy Orton, because The Bloodline is going to make his decision for him. Fans boo but then here comes Solo Sikoa! Jimmy Uso is also with the Enforcer, and the GMs get outta there. Jimmy slides in but Randy stomps away! Solo run sin but Randy fires off hands! Randy fights them both 2v1 but that gets the better of him! But here comes L A KNIGHT! Fans go wild again as the Mega Star runs in and kicks Jimmy! Then he fires off on Solo! Fans chant “YEAH! YEAH!” with every shot! Knight dumps Solo out but Solo drags him out! So Knight fires hands then throws Solo into barriers!
Knight and Solo head up the ramp, but Orton gets Jimmy! He puts Jimmy in the ropes, to DRAPING DDT! And despite what Heyman said, fans want to see it! Orton grins and he hears those voices! Jimmy gets up, for an R K O!!! Heyman is furious, but Orton has the GMs hand over the contracts. Orton looks them both over, Heyman says to stay safe by going with Raw. But Orton looks at Jimmy, who is still out cold. So yeah, Orton signs with SmackDown! Then Orton gets on the mic to say, “Hey, Paul… You can call Roman Reigns. And you can tell him… Daddy’s back.” The fans fire up for that! Aldis raises Randy’s hand in celebration, only to get an RKO!!
The fans are even more fired up as Randy is going to do whatever he wants to whoever he wants! Will the Apex Predator soon make himself the Head of the Table?
A great SmackDown here to follow up Survivor Series while turning the corner. A brilliant story beat for how to get Orton on SmackDown so he can go after The Bloodline, and great move to have LA Knight help out. With Kevin now shifting his attention to Logan Paul and the US Championship, Knight and Orton are going to be a good duo going after the Bloodline together, probably have a tag match with Jimmy & Solo, and maybe a few singles matches, before Randy takes on Roman at the Royal Rumble. I don’t expect Randy to win the Universal Championship because it just doesn’t seem like Roman’s losing before Mania, maybe not even at Mania, but this is going to be good stuff for Randy in his return.
And speaking of the US Championship Contender’s Tournament, awesome field right there, because for one, Karrion Kross gets to do stuff again. And second, it has the classic “settling feuds here” matches you see in WWE tournaments. And also, it gives an NXT superstar an opportunity, possibly even a call-up, so can’t wait to see who HHHBK agree should jump in here. Really good promos from Logan, Kevin and A-Town Down Under to help set this in motion, and Kevin VS Waller was great stuff as a preview. Kevin snatching the win feels like an indicator that he’ll make it to the end, maybe even win the whole thing, only to sadly lose to Logan in the title match.
Lashley being in the field is great, too, he had an awesome opening match with Dunne. Dunne is having to find himself again as his current trio falls apart and then gets beat down by Pretty Deadly. I hope there’s a two birds, one Big Strong Boi opportunity taken here: put Tyler Bate in the contender’s tournament, give him a great showing, but then have him be Dunne’s old-new tag partner so that the mainstream WWE fandom can see the greatness of British Strong Style. And then of course Santos beats Wilde, and Dragon makes a great save to get some heat going into their rematch. I would like to think Dragon wins the rematch to move towards the title, and Santos can screw him over in the later rounds.
And we continue to get awesome stuff out of the DMG CTRL story. Bianca of course wants her title rematch and that means having her go against DMG CTRL again, but Iyo purposefully keeping Bayley at arm’s length is a nice detail. Bayley taking the pin in WarGames despite all her efforts, and then Bayley costing Kairi against Bianca despite her good intentions, the last straw is more than likely gonna be if/when Bayley loses to Bianca, and then maybe, just maybe, the same way Becky and Charlotte made amends, Bayley will try to make amends with Charlotte. There are a lot of stories in WWE right now about forgiveness and grudges, it’d be fitting if Bayley went on a soul searching journey a la Jey Uso and Sami Zayn.
My Score: 8.8/10
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