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Mitchell’s Ring of Honor Report! (5/5/18)

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ROH WRESTLING TELEVISION, Episode 346

The ROH World Champion moves over from singles to Six Man competition as he and The Boys take on The Kingdom! Matt Taven, Vinnie Marseglia & TK O’Ryan want back towards officially owning the World Six Man Tag titles, but so does The Peacock. Which trio will take the next step forward at the others’ expense?

 

All images courtesy of the Fite.TV app and streaming service

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Team Coast 2 Coast VS Brian Milonas & The Beer City Bruiser; Coast 2 Coast wins.
  • Jonathan Gresham VS Will Ferrara; Gresham wins.
  • Shane Taylor VS Ryan Nova; Taylor wins.
  • Six Man Tag: The Kingdom VS Dalton Castle & The Boys; The Kingdom wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Team Coast 2 Coast VS Brian Milonas & The Beer City Bruiser!

Shaheem Ali & Leon St. Giovanni have been rising since their miraculous win over War Machine. However, they’re going up against literally the biggest team in the ROH Tag Division, who already beat them down separately. Now that they’re both 100%, can Ali & LSG pull off another miracle? Or will these behemoth bouncers throw them out of the bar?

And with tempers flaring from that past beating, C2C goes right at Brian & BCB! It is a four man brawl in the middle of the ring! The bigger men get the edge, but then get dumped out of the ring. C2C takes aim, and they slingshot out!

Ali takes out Bruiser, but Brian catches LSG. LSG tries to fight free but Brian keeps hold. Ali notices his friend is caught, so he lurks around the corner, and runs in with a dropkick! Now Brian topples over, and fans fire up with C2C. LSG bicycle boots Brian, then C2C puts Bruiser in the ring. LSG hits a basement dropkick, then Ali adds his own. Brian returns and drags LSG out to the apron, but LSG kicks him away. Ali runs and LSG holds down the ropes so Ali can FLY onto Brian!

The fans are on C2C’s side as they keep Brian down. They put Brian back in the ring, but Bruiser punches LSG out of the springboard, and then kicks Ali from the apron. Bruiser then takes aim, but misses the cannonball! Ali gets back in the ring, and jumps at Brian. Brian catches him, but LSG adds on. Brian catches him too, for a double body slam! The Kingpin gets his team back in control while we go to break.

ROH returns to fans rallying for Ali. Brian & Bruiser have him in their corner, and Brian gives him those Mastadon hip attacks. Bruiser tags and takes LSG out, then cannonballs on Ali in the corner. Cover, TWO, and fans rally for Ali again. Bruiser lifts Ali up, tags Brian, then drops Ali with a Samoan Drop. Brian runs, and gives Ali that fall-down back senton. Brian taunts LSG then tags in Bruiser. He holds Ali down for Bruiser to stomp. Bruiser toys with Ali, but Ail shoves him away. Brian tags back in, but Ali dodges his big leg drop. Bruiser grabs Ali, but Ali enziguris him down. Hot tag to LSG!

The Human Rocket rallies on the bigger men, but his forearms don’t do as much as he thinks… He finds himself trapped, but then gets out of the way as the two run in. Brian & Bruiser collide with each other, then LSG handspring lariats Bruiser down. He goes after Brian with a springboard forearm! Brian goes down, and LSG climbs up. LSG takes aim, and hits the 450 splash! TWO, and LSG is a bit surprised. Bruiser returns but LSG chops him. Still no effect, and Bruiser grabs LSG for a sidewinder DDT! Ali returns, and goes after Bruiser with forearms and chops. He adds a back elbow, then manages to lift Bruiser for the Complete Shot. He takes aim, but Bruiser ducks the leg lariat. Ali runs back at Bruiser, but Bruiser back drops Ali onto Brian’s shoulder.

Brian then throws Ali down with a dominator slam! Brian and Bruiser coordinate as they go after LSG. They bring him up to the top rope, and Brian climbs up to join LSG while Bruiser climbs another corner. Brian SUPERPLEXES LSG, and Bruiser hits the Frog Splash, aka the Last Call combination. Brian covers, but Ali breaks it just in time! Bruiser goes after Ali, whipping him to a corner. He whips Brian in but Ali dodges and kicks back. Bruiser rocks Ali with a right, then whips Ali again, but now he misses and takes a kick. Ali becomes a step stool, LSG launches off of him for a code breaker! C2C sees Brian coming, and double dropkick him to a corner. They run in for double back elbows, then have Brian in position. They go to their corners, and take aim at Brian, for the two-man Coast2Coast!

Cover, C2C win!

Winners: Coast 2 Coast (Ali & LSG), LSG pinning

Don’t call it an upset, this is legit! Ali & LSG are undefeated since their Do or Die victory, can they go all the way to the top?

 

Jay Lethal speaks.

“Without Ring of Honor gold”, Lethal will admit, he is lost. “There’s no other way to put it.” He went to ROH Management about this, and they told him that if he wants his shot, he’ll have to win. Lethal will do them one better: he’ll defeat the people who have recently defeated him. Those losses keep Lethal up at night. But that list isn’t that long, because he’s that good. Even so, Lethal would fight hundreds, as many times as he had to, if it meant getting back to the top spot in ROH. “I must stand at the top of this company with gold around my waist.” Lethal is lost, but he has his way back. Can he succeed on this journey back to the title?

 

The Young Bucks speak.

But what are they to talk about? How about the Tag Gauntlet they won to earn a shot at the ROH World Tag Team Championships. Yes, good idea. Though they’ve wasted some time. Then let Matt speak! “Briscoe Brothers, Young Bucks, let’s do this thing one more time for the ROH Tag Team Championship titles.” Every time they’re in the ring, the Young Bucks give PPV level performances, for free on TV! More Bang for Your Buck, and an invite to the Superkick PARTY! Did that get that in? That’s their time, okay.

 

Jonathan Gresham VS Will Ferrara!

The Dawgs are in the house, but don’t be silly. The Big Dawg is sitting this one out, while the Octopus wrestles Little Willie. Ferrara is off his leash, but will he be able to do anything about Gresham’s grappling ability?

The two keep the Code of Honor while Rhett Titus joins commentary. The bell rings and the two tie up, and Ferrara pushes Gresham to a corner. Gresham turns it around but then Ferrara turns it back. They break, but Ferrara shoves Gresham. Gresham shoves Ferrara back, then the two get in each other’s face. Gresham grabs Ferrara in a headlock takeover, but Ferrara headscissors back, and Gresham pops out for another stare down. They circle, Ferrara gets the headlock takeover but Gresham the headscissors. Ferrara pops out, and it’s another stare down. Fans applaud as the two men circle again. They tie up, Ferrara goes after the arm, but Gresham spins around to reverse the hold. Ferrara reverses back, but Gresham arm-drags Ferrara away, yet Ferrara holds on.

Gresham backs Ferrara down, then spins around, to monkey flip Ferrara, but Ferrara holds on. They stand up and Gresham reverses to a facelock. Ferrara gets the hammerlock, but Gresham gets the headlock and takeover. Ferrara headscissors and Gresham pops out, for a third stand off. Fans applaud the technical exchange while the two circle. Ferrara hits Gresham with a throat chop, Rhett takes credit for teaching him that. Ferrara puts Gresham in a corner and stomps away, then backs off to embrace the heat. He goes back to Gresham, but Gresham hits back with a chop. Gresham whips but Ferrara reverses into an arm wringer. Cover, ONE, but Ferrara keeps his cool while we go to break.

ROH returns to Ferrara covering again, ONE. Ferrara keeps on Gresham’s arm, but Gresham counters by grabbing Ferrara’s arm with his legs, and SNAP. Ferrara walks off, clutching his arm. He comes back to whip Gresham, but Gresham counters with a European Uppercut right to that arm! Ferrara gets to a corner, and Gresham runs in corner to corner. Gresham catches the boot to then give Ferrara a sharp chop. Gresham whips but Ferrara reverses, putting Gresham in a corner. Ferrara runs in and catches Gresham’s boot, but Gresham slips free to hop up and over for a sunset roll. They both stand up but Gresham trips him, rolls him, and kicks the arm. Gresham throws Ferrara with an arm-drag, but that’s proving double-edged from the damage Ferrara has done.

Gresham keeps going, a wrench to hammerlock, to Octopus Stretch! But Gresham can’t finalize it, his own damaged arm can’t grab Ferrara’s. Ferrara gets the ropebreak, and Gresham lets him go. Ferrara goes after Gresham’s arm, but Gresham snapmares. He tries it again, but Gresham snapmares him again. Ferrara tries a third time, so Gresham spins around, spins Ferrara around, then spins himself again for a headlock takeover. Ferrara headscissors, and catches the legs to make it a cover! TWO, and Ferrara goes after the arms again, for the hammerlock lariat! Cover, TWO, and he puts Gresham in a cobra crossface!

Gresham endures the “Dawgface”, as Rhett claims, and drags himself around. Fans rally, and Gresham gets the ropebreak. Ferrara lets go, and both men work to get their arms moving. Ferrara gives a dog headbutt, but Gresham hits back. They throw forearms back and forth, faster and faster. Ferrara knocks Gresham down, but Gresham kips up and enziguris back! Then German Suplex and bridge, TWO! But Gresham keeps going, only for Ferrara to roll him up, TWO. Gresham spins and trips to stomp the bad arm. He rolls Ferrara then Mahistrols then reverse clutch bridge, Gresham wins!

Winner: Gresham, by pinfall

The Octopus continues to use his pure wrestling style to win, but Big Rhett ain’t having it! He goes right into the ring and right after Gresham.

Ferrara joins in, but out come the Motor City Machine Guns!

Alex Shelley & Chris Sabin are Gresham’s friends in Team Search & Destroyer, and they run The Dawgs off. Will Big Rhett & Little Willie regret messing with a friend of former tag team champions?

 

Cody & Marty Scurll speak.

The American Nightmare brings up June 29th, “the day before my birthday”, in Baltimore, Maryland. ROH Best in the World, the very event Cody first became ROH World Champion. The Peacock, Dalton Castle, will defend his title against the #1 contender, “the most deserving contender”, the man who has dominated the news and the ring. Marty agrees, because at BitW, it’ll be The Villain. No, no. It was supposed to be Cody. But hey, Bullet Club is fine. And at ROH BitW– DALTON! You will lose to The Villain! “Damn it, Marty.” Whether it is American Nightmare or British Villain, will it be someone from the Bullet Club who challenges the Peacock?

 

SoCal Uncensored speak.

Frankie Kazarian tells “Kingdom, at Supercard of Honor, you proved you are as dumb as you look when you stole our titles.” The Kingdom not only pissed off The Bullet Club, but the infuriated rightful ROH World Six Man Tag Champions, the SCU. Scorpio Sky adds that SCU will be watching the main event very closely, but also bring up that there’s nothing stopping them from showing up for payback. Christopher Daniels lets The Kingdom know that the difference between the SCU and everyone else is that SCU doesn’t play by the rules. They will finish The Kingdom off by “any way we see fit.”

 

Shane Taylor VS Ryan Nova!

“Pittsburgh, I’m baaack~.” That is how the Notorious Hitman introduces himself to the crowd tonight. “For eight years, Shane Taylor ran the streets of this city doing the same thing that I do in Ring of Honor right now”: get paid to beat people down. Taylor has gotten paid by everyone from Bullet Club to the Kingdom to do what he does best. Ryan Nova’s the kind of guy Taylor’s dealing with now. ROH pays guys like him, who aren’t even regular members of the roster. That money should be in Taylor’s pocket. “So the way I see it”, Taylor’s gonna knock people off, until he’s the only one left. Or in other words, “More Money, Your Problems.”

Nova himself thinks he’s ready, as his pre-match promo warned Taylor that he would be “scorched by Ring of Honor’s One True Supernova.” As for the match, the bell rings and Taylor rocks Nova with a big right knee. Taylor then drags Nova up for one Choke Slam, then a second! He’s not done there, either. He drags Nova up again, and onto his shoulder. Taylor declares “Everybody Dies!” before dropping Nova with a sit-out piledriver!

Taylor doesn’t even have to cover Nova. The referee checks on the man and calls the match.

Winner: Taylor, by referee stoppage

It happened so fast, if you looked away, you missed it all. Just ask Caprice Coleman. Taylor has upped his intensity while changing his mission. Will anyone survive his Notorious Purge?

 

Six Man Tag: The Kingdom VS Dalton Castle & The Boys!

Do not be deceived by those belts in their possession. Matt Taven, Vinnie Marseglia & TK O’Ryan are not the ROH World Six Man Tag Champions, regardless of what they believe. The CMLL NWA World Historic Welterweight Championship, his Horror King and Sassy Wild Horse took those belts out of self-entitlement, but just like The Peacock and his twin fan boys, they have to earn their way back.

The Kingdom hopes Castle is ready, because this main event is just a preview of what will happen on the War of the Worlds Tour. Taven and Castle face off for the ROH WHC, and Taven already feels good about the prospect of becoming an ROH Grand Slam Champion. As for the SCU, what’re they to do about that? Don’t worry, Taven knows a guy. Yes, Taylor implied it and Taven confirms it: The Kingdom has paid Taylor straight cash to be security in case Daniels, Kaz & Sky appear.

The ROH WHC is here!

The Peacock & his Boys are themselves former ROH World Six Man champs, and Castle has a response for Taven. Lowell, Massachusetts, the War of the Worlds event, that match will be for the WHC. “But tonight, Boys!” “CAAAW~!” Is the Kingdom ready for what Castle & The Boys are “bringing to the table?”

ROH returns from a quick break, and this match begins with Castle and TK O’Ryan. O’Ryan stays safe in his corner as Castle approaches. Castle backs off, and we see Taylor keeping a watchful eye over the World Six Man belts. O’Ryan brags he’s “T K O!” but Castle brags he has “B O Y S!” The fans chant “Boys! Boys!” but O’Ryan shouts them down. He and Castle tie up, and they end up in a corner. They honor the break, but O’Ryan slaps Castle and slips away. The referee reprimands O’Ryan while Castle glares at him. O’Ryan returns, but fans chant for Castle. Castle gets a headlock, O’Ryan powers out but Castle powers him down. Things speed up and Castle catches O’Ryan and throws him overhead! O’Ryan tags out to Vinnie, then kicks the barriers in frustration.

Fans chant for Vinnie, Pittsburgh seems to like his horror movie style. Vinnie talks trash but Castle shoves him. Vinnie shoves back, so Castle trips him and rolls him with a waistlock. Castle mounts into the body scissors and armlock, but Vinnie resists. Castle drives elbows into Vinnie, then shifts back to the waistlock. Vinnie backs Castle into a corner and throws elbows of his own. Vinnie gets free and runs side to side for a forearm smash. He runs and hits another, then goes to throw Castle into the corner, only for Castle to throw him. Castle throws Vinnie overhead, and then Castle tags into Boy 1. Or is it 2? Either way, The light haired Boy A brings Boy B up onto his shoulders, and Castle feeds Vinnie to the Boy Boot.

The Boys work together to wrench and whip Vinnie to a corner. Boy A is put on the apron and then elbowed away. Boy B runs in and spins Vinnie around, but Vinnie tosses him off the sliced bread. The Boy pushes Vinnie into the corner, but Vinnie dodges him, only to run into Boy A’s swing kick. Vinne staggers and Boy B rolls him for Boy A’s missile dropkick. Cover, TWO, and Boy A fires up, only for Vinnie to chop him into the Kingdom’s corner. Taven and O’Ryan hold onto Boy A, but Boy A still escapes Vinnie’s forearm. Vinnie rocks Boy A with a knee, then knocks him down with a boot. Vinnie stalks the Boy, then drags him up by his “boy bun”. He puts Boy in chinlock, then tags in the ring leader, Matt Taven.

Taven toys with the Boy, and dares the champion to tag in. Boy A crawls over and tags in Castle, and fans actually duel between Castle and Taven. Taven and Castle bump chests, testing who is the alpha, but Castle starts turning it into a chest rubbing game. Taven shoves Castle to the corner, then tries to sucker punch, but Castle evades. Castle swings but Taven evades, Taven swings but Castle evades. They repeat this again and again, until Castle lifts Taven up. Taven holds the ropes to avoid Bangarang like his life depends on it. Castle lets him go, but then runs in for a big knee strike. The Peacock is in control while we go to break.

ROH returns once more, to Taven slipping out of the saido suplex. Taven’s leg buckles and he clutches it as he leans against the ropes. Castle runs in but Taven dodges. Taven swings but Castle dodges, then clotheslines Taven out of the ring. Castle builds speed but The Kingdom trip him up, and trip up the Boys! Castle still boots Taven down while Vinnie wreckes the Boys. Taven gets in the ring and trash talks Castle. Taven shoves Castle, and that brings him close enough for O’Ryan to grab a leg! Vinnie also comes in, and The Kingdom hold Castle down for Taven to stomp the fingers! Castle clutches his wounded and wrapped hand, so Boy A tags in.

The Boys stand up 2v3, but the fans are on their side! Vinnie & O’Ryan laugh, but end up getting hands! The Boys club them down, but Taven is the difference maker. He grabs each Boy, only to get double dropkicks. But that gives O’Ryan & Vinnie an opening to club The Boys from behind. Then they double flapjack Boy B down! They add a back senton and fist drop, then Taven joins in to stomp away on Boy B. The referee reprimands The Kingdom but the damage is done. O’Ryan distracts the referee, and Vinnie uses the ropes to choke Boy B. O’Ryan comes over and lifts Boy B with a big back suplex. Cover, TWO, but The Kingdom keeps calm.

O’Ryan tags Taven in, and Taven suplexes Boy B down. Cover, TWO, and Boy A rallies for his brother. Taven tags in Vinnie while the fans duel, and Vinnie stomps Boy B more. Vinnie drags Boy B up for a EuroUpper, then tags in O’Ryan. O’Ryan & Vinnie toy with Boy B, but he fights back with haymakers and elbows. He rocks Vinnie, and headscissors, only for O’Ryan to turn that into a pop-up spinebuster! Vinnie adds a flying headbutt, then Taven adds the shining wizard! “Because I’M MATT TAVEN!” But wait, Christopher Daniels appears!?

The Fallen Angel goes right to Taylor, but not to fight. Daniels wants the belts back, and Taven is there to keep them. Taylor shoves Daniels down! But while Daniels storms off, distracting everyone else, the Boys pull off Twin Magic! Boy A is now in the ring, and O’Ryan turns around to take a kick to the face. Hot tag to Castle, and the Peacock rallies! He chops O’Ryan, rocks Vinnie, then hits O’Ryan again. Castle rocks Taven, and counters O’Ryan into an elbow and corner knee. O’Ryan shoves Castle but Castle takes out Vinnie, then dumps O’Ryan down with a judo throw. The fans fire up for The Peacock, and he asks for a Boy. Boy A volunteers, and Castle helps him FLY onto Taven!

Boy B comes in and he FLIES on Vinnie! Then Boy A returns, to FLY on O’Ryan! Boy B then FLIES onto Taven, and Boy A onto Vinnie! Castle throws Boy B at O’Ryan, then Boy A! The fans are all fired up for this Boy-apalooza, and the Boys feed O’Ryan to Castle. Castle has the Boys whip him, but Castle runs into Taven’s kick. Castle still rocks O’Ryan, but Taven then uses a belt as a weapon! The belt hits Castle’s hand and he writhes in pain. Taven wants Castle, but he tags out to Boy A. Boy A springboards but Taven gets under, to then hit him with The Climax!

Cover, The Kingdom wins!

Winners: The Kingdom (Taven, Vinnie & O’Ryan), Taven pinning

The CMLL NWA World Historic Welterweight Championship and his cohorts defeat Castle & The Boys tonight, making gains in the ROH World Six Man Division. At the same time, Taven has momentum going into his ROH World Championship challenge against Castle. With a damaged wing already a big target, will The Peacock be able to stop Taven’s Grand Slam?

But then the Kingdom attacks Castle & The Boys again! They are sore winners as they punch and stomp away. Taven grabs a chair, and they go after Castle. Vinnie drags Castle over to go after that arm, with O’Ryan helping out. Taven climbs up high while Vinnie gets the arm threaded inside the chair. Taven flies, and stomps the chair to crush the arm!!

The Kingdom are vile, but they’re also one step away from having the top titles in ROH. Will there be consequences for these despicable tactics?!

 


 

My Thoughts:

This was a strong go-home episode to the War of the Worlds tour events, happening May 9th to the 13th. C2C VS Brian & BCB was a solid opener given their story with each other. Ali & LSG are becoming great stars of the ROH Tag Team Division, but with the titles belonging to The Briscoes and possibly going back to The Young Bucks, it’s going to be a while before they’re the champions. Ferrara VS Gresham was an impressive match, and Ferrara reminds everyone he’s not just a comedy Heel. I still hope between this and Gresham’s overall story, the ROH Pure (Wrestling) Championship returns. The promos were great for setting up story, especially for Bullet Club. Cody and Scurll both want the world title, but only one can hold it, so this will surely add a new wrinkle to the Bullet Club is (not) Fine story.

Taylor adds a new layer to his story by becoming Shane Taylor: Destroyer of Jobbers, so that it’ll make sense for him to have a bunch of squash matches where he crushes guys like Ryan Nova. Then he is brought back into the story with SCU, Kingdom, etc. which could go any number of ways. And speaking of The Kingdom, the fact O’Ryan & Vinnie wore camo pants referencing The Dudley Boys’ signature might be foreshadowing Bully Ray being Taven’s inside guy. Sure they argued before Supercard, but between their actions at the PPV and Bully’s own Heel turn, they could end up being the standard corrupt authority and chosen wrestlers for ROH. I don’t think Taven wins the ROH WHC, but The Kingdom could use Bully to finally get those World Six Man titles back.

My Score: 8.5/10


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Mitchell’s ROH Death Before Dishonor Results & Report! (7/26/24)

YEEHAW!

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The word of the day is, “Gold!”

ROH brings Death Before Dishonor to Texas, and makes it bigger than ever! SIX championship matches, how drastically will the landscape change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – MXM Collection VS Spanish Announce Project; wins.
  • Komander VS The Beast Mortos; wins.
  • Texas Deathmatch: Leyla Hirsch VS Diamante; wins.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championship Qualifier: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS The Dark Order; wins and advances to Battle of the Belts 11.
  • ROH World Tag Team Championships: The Kingdom VS Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O’Reilly; win(s) and
  • ROH World Television Championship Survival of the Fittest: Atlantis Jr. VS Lio Rush VS Shane Taylor VS Johnny TV VS Lee Johnson VS Brian Cage; wins and
  • ROH Pure Championship: Wheeler Yuta VS Lee Moriarty; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship: Billie Starkz VS Red Velvet; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Championship: Athena VS Queen Aminata; wins and
  • ROH World Championship: Mark Briscoe VS Roderick Strong; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 7.25.2024

Slammiversary Fallout! Where do things go on the way to Victory Road?

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Well now we start the fall out of Slammiversary. Josh Alexander in his bad bitch summer, X-Speedball legacy, ABC got the t-a-g and Jordynne is still in charge of the Knockouts division. Like I said at the end of Slammiversary, all of the champions being Babyfaces is stupid. They need to drop a couple titles fairly quickly, because I don’t care what some people say, Nic Nemeth ain’t gonna bring any eyes to the brand. He’s about as hot as day old Hamburger Helper over a camping sterno.

We’ll probably open with the luke warm champion, so tune in like 10 minutes late for anything of substance to be happen.

https://x.com/i/status/1816629254349533588

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner: Maclin wins via KIA – *
  • AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan: AJ wins via Down Payment – **
  • Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young): Hammer Your ASH wins via Torture Rack – ** 1/2
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey): Broken Alphabet wins via Twist & Splash – ***

 

Results:

Nemeth gives the ole “I’ll be a fighting champion…blah blah” promo and drops the “any company” line that we’ve already understood what that means. Campaign Singh cuts him off…and I never thought I’d be happy for Campaign Singh to walk out and say anything…ever. And…Mustafa’s promo is worse than Dolph’s. He’s gone from parody to caricature even saying “it was the biggest screw job Montreal ever saw”. Like some of these lines are cheap heat, but most are just brain dead comments that wouldn’t get a reaction out of anyone (and the crowd was silent for that comment). Mustafa gets caught in an Archer “phrasing” moment about getting screwed hard, but this is painful. Promos written by 14 year olds everyone…

This ends with Ali challenging Nemeth for the World Title. While I’m not against walk up challenges, I watch Japanese wrestling, I don’t really get the point aside from doing it just to do it. 

ABC and Matt Hardy have a small promo, and I’m still not really a fan of Unbroken Matt Version 6.0. The floating between Broken voice and his normal voice sounds amateurish.

OH LOOK, finally a match 20 minutes into the show. And it’s my son Steve Maclin! OH CHRIST he’s facing Deaner. This has been 25 minutes of talking followed by the worst god damn attempt at a gimmick. Deaner’s little “Papa Santino told me I can wipe my ass only if the crowd agrees”. This gimmick should die in a fire.

Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner

Deaner started off quick because Maclin was in disbelief that Deaner was actually gonna fight him. Maclin dodges a Crossbody, Busaiku Knee, and just starts beating on Deaner for fun. And this is fun, maybe Maclin can make sure Deaner gets stretchered out and written off forever. How do you call for an ambulance in French? Maclin with the old Back Breaker into a stretch. Deaner tries to nerd rage up, breaks the Back Breaker Stretch, his punch combo, into a Manhattan Drop and Bulldog. Deaner hits the Crossbody, but Maclin kicks out. This is entirely too competitive.

Deaner goes for the Deaner DDT, blocked, Olympic Slam into Splashing Deaner into the corner, Caught in the Crosshairs, K-I-A, thanks for coming you damn dweeb. Stay in Canada and don’t travel Deaner, please.

https://x.com/i/status/1816633784537874761

AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan

As the bell sounds, Sami knocks Rich off the apron, Low Bridges AJ, does the Beats of the Bodhran on AJ and then AJ eats the offense and strategizes with his crew. Bishop and Rich swarm the ring, Sami allows himself to get distracted so AJ slides in and starts beating on Sami. AJ throats Sami across the middle rope and Rich makes his presence felt, AJ distracts the referee and Rich gets in a lot of cheap shots. Bishop throws Sami back in the ring, and AJ keeps up the pressure. Lots of 5 count chokes and leverage moves. After the commercial break ends, Sami dodges a Tennessee Whiskey Knee, gets in a few shots before Rich trips Sami as he’s setting up a Dive, and then AJ takes advantage of the position and hits the goofball knee strike.

AJ calls for his Chokeslam, Sami tries to break it with Axe Handles, then claws the eyes. Sami goes for a Scoop Slam, gets him part way up and then falls over. AJ Chokeslam again, but he bites his hand and starts fighting back. Launches himself at AJ, sends him bouncing off the ropes and uses the momentum to hit that Scoop Slam that was teased earlier. Sami goes for a Western Lariat but eats a Big Boot. AJ does a little Hulk Hogan pose to signal a Leg Drop, but Sami dodges and then connects on a Sliding Lariat. Thumbs Up, Thumbs….interference. Rich distracts the ref, Bishop lays out Sami, AJ connects with the Down Payment.

Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young)

ASH and Jordynne exchange slaps and then Jordynne starts to out muscle ASH. Spinebuster from Jordynne, Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights off, rope run, Sattelite DDT into both tagging out. EY does the Flair corner flop, slides back in between Hammer’s legs, and connects on a Neckbreaker. EY is the quicker of the two, but Hammer finally gets his hands on him and a Release Belly to Belly into a full mount raining of fists, then a near fall. Hammer smashes EY in a corner, Arm Wringer into an Irish Whip across, but EY moves and Hammer tags out to ASH. ASH levels Jordynne, peppers EY with a few shots and pulls him back to their corner and starts some tandem offense with Hammerman. Hammer Guerilla Presses ASH and throws her into EY for a near fall. Hammer looks to aim for either a Powerbomb or Nightmare Pendulum, but EY drops it into a Small Package, pinfall kick out, they both run, Double Lariat spot. The Knockouts get tagged in.

Jordynne is in control early, World’s Strongest Slam into a Vader Bomb. Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights it off and tags out to Hammer. Jordynne and EY do some schoolyard stuff with the old Push while Jordynne is down to trip Hammer. All four get in, ASH gets leveled, EY gets leveled, Hammer and Jordynne have a brief face off, but Hammer throws Jordynne to the apron and ASH connects with a Meteora from the apron. Death Valley Driver from Young on Hammer, ASH stares in shock, EY tells her to get, ASH runs away. EY goes up for his Macho Elbow, and ASH causes him to fall to Hammer’s feet, Torture Rack, and EY submits.

Josh Alexander comes out, with new heel music. And it’s not that bad, definitely better than some other people’s new music. Josh yells at the crowd a bit, says he can’t wait til he’s back in a real Canadian town, like his home of Toronto. Then he drops the mic in lieu of an explanation. The crowd chants him off with the “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey”. 

https://x.com/i/status/1816647373654724937

The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey)

JDC and Hardy start, but JDC quickly tags out to Myers and that doesn’t go well. Hardy grabs a hold of Myers, a few Delete chops, drags him to his corner and they all get in a few shots punctuated with Hardy getting tagged back in and an Elbow into Myers’ extended and worked on left arm. Myers stays isolated, back into the corner, Boot to the gut, Ace tags in and wallops Myers. Ace connects on Double Kicks, into Russian Leg Sweep and his half of Click Click Boom, for a 2 count. Myers finally gets free with a Jaw Breaker and tags out to Eddie. But The System gets no momentum, Ace stifles Eddie’s offense and starts a few quick tags with him and Bey for tandem offense. Moose finally comes down the ramp as Eddie kicked out of yet another pinfall attempt because The System has had nothing going for them. Eddie finally gets some offense since Moose was a big enough distraction.

Eddie thinks they have a spot, so he tags back in JDC, but The ABC stop him cold, tag in Matt Hardy, and Matt walks down JDC, but JDC Low Bridges. Matt is on the outside, so all of The System surrounds Hardy, then Joe Hendry’s music hits! That stops the heel beatdown, and we follow Hendry’s entire entrance. So that proves Hendry is bigger than the 8 other people in this frame. Not really sure if that’s optics you want to push along. Ace and JDC try to remind people there’s wrestling going on, but JDC thumbs the eye to get a little something going. Vertical Suplex for a near fall, tag out for Eddie and Eddie lights up Ace with some of those NOAH Chops. Ace retreats to the ropes and Alisha chokes him with the ropes while the ref is distracted.

Myers gets tagged in, Ace tries to use the crowd energy, Myers stops it at first but then Ace slips a Scoop Slam and tags out to Bey. Hot tag, strike rush, Double Stomp, educated feet, Leap Frog to the corner but Lish climbs on the apron and yells at Bey which stops his rhythm. Myers kicks his feet out and causes Bey to crash. Eddie tags in for a few shots, then to JDC and Slingshot Knees, Wringer Snapmare, Bow and Arrow Submission, and JDC is just doing solid wrestling work right now. Uppercut between the Shoulder Blades as Bey tries to get out, tag to Myers and Bey is still eating offense. Eddie tags in, Bey tries the Sunset Flip, but Eddie tags out before going over, so Myers folds up Bey for a near fall and then tags out to JDC who connects on a Standing Suplex, slams Bey’s face into the corner, Eddie tags in, and Bey finally fights up to his feet, Eddie just flatten Bey’s comeback, tries a Tiger Driver but eats an Enzuigiri for a simultaneous tag. JDC and Hardy come in, JDC tries to exit halfway in, but Hardy is wrecking shop. He disposes of Eddie, Myers slides in but eats a tandem Neckbreaker/DDT from Hardy. Face team does the Delete Corner Face Smashes. Poetry in Motion into a Side Effect into Corkscrew Swanton for only 2 since Myers breaks it up! Everyone throwing hands, referee is distracted, Moose comes in to Spear Hardy, but Hardy dodges and throws him into JDC (I get the call back), Hendry then lays out Moose with the big Lariat. Twist of Fate from Hardy, Splash from Bey, Broken Alphabet wins!

 

Overall Score: 4/10

Ugh, cliche promos, too damn much talking, a competitive squash match with an imbecile as our first “match”, into an overbooked and slow heel match, finally a decent tag match (with the right team going over), into another overbooked match with a “tease” for the mystery backup being more obvious than Jericho’s WWF debut.

Aside from the afore mentioned tag match, The Rascalz promo and The System Promo; this was hard to watch. A lot of cornball promos, Rosemary licks her conspiracy board, storylines got zero traction. Whoopity Doo, Ryan Nemeth got a match next week and we get an undead wedding.

While this was a bad episode, it was bad by at least new standards. We’re not back in the TNA Dark Days again, but this was…a useless show.


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