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Mitchell’s WWE Monday Night Raw Report! (7/2/18)

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6 years ago

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With the Huggable Bayley going berserk on The Boss (and her supposed friend) Sasha Banks, Raw GM Kurt Angle has demanded they BOTH go to anger management! Can therapy bring these two back around? Or will it only make things worse? Plus, will Seth Rollins & Roman Reigns have something to say about Ziggler & McIntyre?

 

All images courtesy of the WWE’s official Twitter

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Woken Hardy VS Curt Axel w/ Bo Dallas; Axel wins.
  • Titus Worldwide VS The Authors of Pain; The Authors of Pain win.
  • Seth Rollins & Roman Reigns VS Drew McIntyre & Dolph Ziggler; Roman & Rollins win, by disqualification.
  • Ember Moon VS Liv Morgan w/ Sarah Logan; Ember wins.
  • Bobby Lashley & Roman Reigns VS The Revival; Lashley & Reigns win, by disqualification.
  • Mickie James w/ Alexa Bliss VS Nia Jax; Nia wins.
  • Kevin Owens VS Braun Strowman; Strowman wins, by count out.

PLAY BY PLAY

Roman Reigns heads to the ring!

The Big Dog opens Raw in Sioux Falls, coming off a loss to The Revival alongside Bobby Lashley, but also saving his Shield Brother, Seth Rollins from Dolph Ziggler & Drew McIntyre. Roman speaks on the “extremely talented” duo, and admits he never thought he’d lose to The Revival. He did have the worst tag team partner of all time, though, in Bobby Lashley. For whatever reason, Kurt Angle wants Roman to team with “Bob” again. But Roman just wants to fight “Bob.” And if he doesn’t get to fight at Extreme Rules, he’ll fight him tonight! “Bob” is a fool, thinking he’s The Guy, when 10 years ago he wasn’t because he couldn’t handle it. And 10 years from now, Lashley still won’t be The Guy because ROMAN is the Guy! Roman is the Big Dog how runs the Yard!

But wait, here comes Ziggler & McIntyre! Ziggler wants to understand something: Roman is someone else is an egomaniac. The guy who makes it all about him, walking around like he owns the place. Roman calls Ziggler’s ring His Yard. Roman acts like the world has to go through him. McIntyre says Roman couldn’t help himself in “playing the hero”, even for Rollins. The former Intercontinental Champion, Seth Rollins. But that’s what brings them out here. If Roman wants to make all of this all about him, “that’s fine by us.” He stuck his nose in their business, so it’s their turn. Roman fights both Ziggler & McIntyre! But that’s 2v1 and they get Roman down on the mat. So here comes Seth Rollins!

Rollins evens the numbers, and kicks McIntyre out of the ring. Rollins gets Ziggler down but McIntyre saves the Show-Off. McIntyre & Ziggler are in retreat while the Shield Brothers regroup. Roman is getting pulled in different directions, where will he put his focus?

 

Rollins & Roman find Angle backstage.

They want to settle this with Ziggler & McIntyre asap! Angle will accept their request, and schedule a match for next week. Next week? That doesn’t sit right with Roman. Just do it now! No, Roman has to team with Lashley against The Revival. Well, okay, since they want it so bad, they’ll get it tonight. Roman & Rollins get a chance at revenge, will it go their way? And what of Lashley and the #TopGuys, Dash & Dawson?

 

WOKEN Hardy VS Curt Axel w/ Bo Dallas!

The WOKEN Wisdom is without the Eater of Worlds, who was in an accident of automobiles over the previous day of Frige. But WOKEN Axel says last week’s WONDERFUL battle will forever be etched in the multiverse. But a galactic glitch will bring a new Twist of Fate. Bo Wyatt adds that his Woken Wisdom Friend must face the ferocious B Team all by his lonesome. Wait, the song! “You may never truly be alone, because he’s got the whole~ world~, in his hands.”

For those unclear on what’s happening, yes, it is a rematch from last week’s match where a simple ACCIDENT cost Woken Hardy the win. Can Axel keep his team “undefeated” another week? Or will he be DELETED?

They tie up, Hardy gets the headlock, then shifts to a roll up. ONE, and Axel backs away to a corner. Axel and Hardy circle while fans chant DELETE. Axel gets the headlock and the takedown to a facelock. Bo coaches Axel, but Hardy reverses to DELETE Shoulder Breakers. Hardy wrenches the wrist, then whips Axel to ropes. He runs Axel over with a back elbow, covers, TWO. Hardy brings Axel up again, for haymakers. He keeps on Axel with those makers of hay, then whips him again. Axel reverses for a back elbow of his own. Axel brings Hardy up for buckle bumps and stomps. He grinds a forearm into Hardy’s face, then backs off at 4.

Hardy comes out with a kick and a headlock. Axel powers out but Bo swipes at the feet. Hardy fights them both off, but Axel denies the Twist. Hardy chants DELETE while we go to break.

Raw returns and Axel has Hardy in a lock of the arm. hardy fights out while fans rally. Axel knees low and whips for a dropkick. Axel brags but fans boo. He stomps Hardy to a corner, then clubs him in the back. Hardy hits back, backs Axel down, but Axel kicks him low. Axel lifts for the breaker of back, covers, TWO. Axel snapmares and neck snaps Hardy, then covers, TWO! The B Team grows frustrated, but Axel follows Hardy to the apron. Hardy hits back, Side Effect on the apron! Hardy powers up and goes after Axel with DELETE forearms and buckle bumps. He backs off while Bo throws a fit, then comes back for a clothesline and second Side Effect! Cover, TWO! Hardy climbs up, and drops the ax handle. He climbs up again, and drops an elbow! Cover, TWO!

Bo is relieved, but Hardy prepares the Twist. Axel stands up but Bo distracts from the apron. Axel hits back, whips but is reversed. Hardy ends up going up and into the post! Axel then hits his twisting neckbreaker! Cover, Axel wins!

Winner: Curt Axel, by pinfall

Just a couple weeks away from Extreme Rules and their Raw Tag Team Championships, and The B Team is on a WONDERFUL roll! Will they dethrone the Deleters of Worlds as easily as they won tonight?

 

Rollins and Roman prepare backstage.

Not only is Roman having two matches tonight, but he still doesn’t have an Extreme Rules match. Meanwhile, Rollins has a 30-Minute Ironman Match against Dolph Ziggler for the Intercontinental Championship. Speaking of the double header, Lashley comes in to talk with Roman alone. “You have some huge brass ones calling me an egomaniac.” Is Roman Superman or something? No, he’s a heat magnet, and expect for his “brother”, no one likes him.

Lashley doesn’t like Roman, either. And as much as he’d rather fight Roman at Extreme Rules, they have to work together. Roman tells Lashley to shut up. Roman wills tart and finish the match because he’ll win it. All Lashley has to do is flash that fake smile and collect the check. He better, or Lashley will hold him responsible again. Is that a threat? Yes, it is. Can these two work together at all tonight?

 

Raw has footage of Sasha’s & Bayley’s first counseling session.

The Legit Boss and Huggable One both have 10 o’clock meetings with whoever is in 6A. They argue over who actually has the appointment, but it’s DR. SHELBY! He’ll be helping them in their paired friendship counseling. Let’s enter the Friend Zone!

To start, Shelby calls it the Friend Zone because the only rule is to be accepting. Love, helping, joy, sharing, time, honesty, respect. Those are the principles of friendship. Can Bayley & Sasha survive each other long enough to pass the class?

 

Titus Worldwide VS The Authors of Pain!

While veterans Titus & Apollo were just trying to give the younger Akam & Rezar advice, the former NXT Tag Team Champions didn’t want it. Then when AoP brutally beat down the Gibson Brothers, Titus Worldwide came to the rescue. Now these two teams will battle directly to see if the main roster rookies really do have something to learn.

The bell rings and Titus starts against Rezar. They power up and Titus puts Rezar in a headlock. Rezar powers out and collides with Titus, and is actually staggered to the corner. Apollo tags in and hits a big splash in the corner. But Apollo is put in the AoP corner and Akam tags in. Akam throws Apollo, then whips. Apollo goes up and over, impressed as always. Things speed up and Apollo dropkicks Akam. Akam staggers and tags in Rezar, then lifts him up for Rezar to throw down. Rezar trash talks in Albanian, then stalks Apollo to a corner. Rezar brings Apollo up to ram shoulders into his back, then throws him out to another corner. He trash talks Apollo, then throws him again! Rezar covers, ropebreak.

Apollo rolls away but Rezar is on him with neck wrench. Fans rally for Apollo, and Apollo gets up, but Rezar just powers him to the AoP corner. Akam tags in, and the AoP go for another suplex into the powerbomb neckbreaker! Titus breaks the pin, then goes after Rezar. Rezar blcoks him, and Akam helps Rezar throw Titus into a post! Apollo rolls up Akam, TWO! Powerslam from Akam, then tag to Rezar. They drag Apollo up, LAST CHAPTER! Cover, AoP win!

Winners: The Authors of Pain, Rezar pinning

That’s all Akam & Rezar wrote on Titus Worldwide! They have more than enough to defeat a veteran tag team, how long until they’re tag team champions?

 

Roman and Rollins talk again.

How did the talk with “Bob” go? Roman doesn’t really know, he didn’t listen to the guy. That aside, these two are on the same page for their match up next.

 

Kevin Owens arrives a little late.

Perhaps it has to do with needing a new rental car after Braun Strowman flipped the last one as more of a prank. The valet says Kevin can’t park here, he’ll need his keys to relocate. Kevin says “No chance.” Then he puts up his hood, in hopes Strowman won’t spot him. Will he make it through the rest of the night? Or will he #GetTheseHands all over again?

 

Seth Rollins & Roman Reigns VS Drew McIntyre & Dolph Ziggler!

The Architect & The Big Dog are united in wanting to shut up and shut down the Show-Off & The Scottish Stud. Ziggler and Rollins will meet again 1v1 in an Ironman match at Extreme Rules, can their friends help them gain momentum before then?

The teams sort out and it’s Rollins starting against Ziggler as a sampler for their coming rematch. They circle, tie up, and Rollins gets a waistlock. Rollins brings Ziggler to the mat, but Ziggler turns it around. Rollins turns that back around, but Ziggler resists. Ziggler gets out and around, and rolls Rollins, ONE. The two back off, then tie up again. Rollins gets the armlock, but Ziggler has the counter. Ziggler switches to a headlock, but Rollins powers out. Things speed up and Ziggler counters the hip-toss to a roll up. TWO, and Rollins dropkicks Ziggler down. Ziggler gets to his corner, and tags in McIntyre. McIntyre steps up to Rollins, and now they tie up. McIntyre wrenches Rollins with a headlock, then brings him down to his knees. Fans rally, and Rollins powers out. McIntyre runs Rollins over with a shoulder, and fans boo.

McIntyre runs, things speed up, but the hip toss doesn’t work as McIntyre shoves Rollins. Rollins evades, and gets to his corner. Roman nods, and Rollins tags him in. The Big Dog steps to McIntyre, but McIntyre grins. McIntyre welcomes the challenge, and fans duel. They circle, tie up, and are even in strength. But McIntyre starts pushing Roman to a corner! McIntyre throws knees, haymakers and stomps! He backs off at 4, then comes back, but Roman turns it around for a flurry of right hands! Roman backs off, but comes back with corner punches. McIntyre shoves him away, but runs into the fireman’s carry. McIntyre slips out, but gets an uppercut! Roman sees Ziggler coming, but McIntyre headbutts Roman! Lashley is watching, and doesn’t like Roman’s lack of focus.

McIntyre rains down rights on Roman, then tags in Ziggler for a SUPERKICK! Roman is down, and Ziggler covers, TWO! Ziggler grows frustrated, but he keeps on Roman at the ropes with a choke. He backs off at 4, and Roman coughs and gasps. Ziggler drags Roman back up, bumps him off buckles, then tags McIntyre. McIntyre kicks Roman’s ribs, then chops him across the chest. He drags Roman out for a neckbreaker. Cover, TWO, so McIntyre tags Ziggler in. McIntyre holds Roman for Ziggler to stomp. Ziggler drags Roman up, and bumps him off buckles. Ziggler throws hands, then backs off to shout how he’s the best. He runs in at Roman, but the uppercut intercepts the splash! Both men are down and fans rally up. Roman and Ziggler crawl, hot tag to Rollins!

Rollins rallies and jumps around, Slingblade for Ziggler and a dropkick for McIntyre. Rollins runs to DIVE! McIntyre hits the barrier, Drive-By from Rollins to Ziggler! Rollins climbs up, Frog Splash!

Cover, but McIntyre breaks in. Roman returns but McIntyre clotheslines him back out. Rollins knees McIntyre out but Ziggler rolls up. TWO, Rollins covers, TWO. Rollins blocks the superkick into a catapult that sends Ziggler to the outside! Rollins fires up again as he climbs up, and LEAPS! The super crossbody wipes both Ziggler & McIntyre out while we go to break!

Raw returns and Ziggler keeps Rollins away from Roman with a sleeper hold. Rollins reaches for Roman as well as the ropes. Roman reaches, too, but Rollins falls to the mat. Ziggler squeezes with body scissors, but Rollins gets a second wind. Fans duel as Rollins stands up and backs Ziggler into an open corner. The hold breaks, and Rollins crawls, but Ziggler intercepts with a Famouser!

Cover, TWO! Ziggler drags Rollins over and tags McIntyre. McIntyre stomps Rollins’ right hand, then drags Rollins up for a chop. Rollins staggers to ropes, but McIntyre stretches him back against the ropes. The ref coutns and McIntyre lets go. Rollins chops back, but so does McIntyre. Rollins slips out of teh suplex and throws McIntyre out! McIntyre trips Roman! McIntyre then powers Rollins to his corner for him and Ziggler to mug. Ziggler tags while Rollins is sent out of the ring.

Ziggler drags Rollins up and rakes the eyes, then whips, but Rollins reverses! Rollins sends Ziggler into barriers, but McIntyre helps Ziggler up. Tag to McIntyre, and he denies another tag to Roman,. SUPERKICK from Rollins sends McIntyre down and out! Rollins crawls, fans are thunderous, but Ziggler returns! But he runs into a powerbomb! Rollins crawls again, and Roman reaches, but The Revival attack!! They go right at Roman!

Winners: Roman & Rollins, by disqualification

Now Roman and Rollins fight off the #TopGuys, but McIntyre & Ziggler add on to make it 4v2!

Dash & Dawson aren’t waiting for later, they want revenge now. Meanwhile, Ziggler & McIntyre put Rollins in the ring. The Revival whip Roman into steel steps, but Rollins works to fight off McIntyre and Ziggler! He can’t, it’s still 2v1. Dash & Dawson keep Roman down while Ziggler & McIntyre hit Rollins with Zig-Zag Claymore! Then Roman is brought into the ring by The Revival. Fans boo while they bring Roman up, for SHATTER MACHINE!

Will Rollins be okay in time for the Ironman match? Will Roman be okay for his second match later tonight?

 

Kevin meets with  Angle backstage.

Something has to be done about Bruan Strowman. They cant have someone running around doing whatever they want! Well, they settle things in the ring, so does Kevin want a match? No! He just wants Strowman to go away. Put him in counseling! No, suspend him! No, FIRE him! Actually, Angle feels like Kevin should face Strowman tonight. The worst case scenario for Kevin has happened, will he survive Strowman tonight?

 

Constable Baron Corbin heads to the ring.

After their tag team dysfunction led to a loss, “Stephanie McMahon’s personally appointed” Constable Corbin has words for the Extraordinary Finn Balor. He is here to help. It doesn’t matter who they are or who they are, everyone needs help to reach their full potential. If a boss chews you out, they’re trying to help. If a teacher sends you to detention or a police officer gives you a ticket, they’re just helping. Corbin is constable to help Angle be a better GM and all the superstars reach their full potential.

Though, there’s always someone to proud to accept the help. Finn was exhausted so Corbin tagged in, yet Finn kicks him down. That’s why Corbin pulled him from the ring to talk strategy. They ended up fighting, and they got counted out. Such behavior is “inappropriate and unprofessional.” Therefore, Corbin invites Finn out here so Finn can apologize to Corbin. Finn accepts the invitation and does head to the ring.

Corbin thanks Finn for cooperating. This doesn’t have to be hard, just admit you were wrong and that you’ll never do that again. Finn doesn’t speak, so Corbin apologizes first. When he hit Finn, he was just trying to communicate. He forgets he’s so much bigger, stronger and tougher, so he’s sorry. Finn’s turn. Finn says he’s sorry, that his comments about the vest got Corbin fired from TGI Friday’s.

Corbin gets it, Finn is angry over a loss two weeks ago. Corbin will be the bigger man, because he actually is. Finn, say you’re sorry. Finn does feel Corbin needs an apology. Form whoever gave Corbin that haircut. “Listen, you little twerp!” He knows it’s hard out there for guys like Finn, who doesn’t get the opportunities or the pay like Corbin does. Stephanie made Corbin a constable for a reason, so give him the respect he deserves! Fans say “No! No!” but Finn says, “I’m sorry. But you stopped deserving anyone’s respect the day you became Stephanie’s stooge!” Corbin hits Finn! He drags Finn up, then whips Finn, but Finn dodges to Slingblade! Then to wreck Corbin with a dropkick! Finn climbs up, takes aim, but Corbin retreats. This isn’t over between them, who will be the sorry one when it’s all over?

 

Elias plays when the Riott Squad appear.

Is the Drifter performing tonight? For Sioux Falls? No. But for Liv & Sarah, he has a song in mind. Liv & Sarah like it, they #StartARiott! Thanks, Elias! These two are headed out, even with their Squad Leader down with injury. Can they represent for Ruby to the fullest tonight?

 

Ember Moon VS Liv Morgan w/ Sarah Logan!

The Prophecy of Flame has been on fire since coming to Raw, but so has the Riott Squad since the Superstar Shake-Up. Team leader Ruby is out with a leg injury, but that doesn’t mean the riot has to end. Will #LivStrong win strong against the rising War Goddess? Or will Ember Eclipse the wild ones tonight?

The bell rings and Ember ties up with Liv. Liv powers Ember to ropes but Ember standing switches. Liv gets a headlock, but Ember powers out. She still gets whipped but counters the hip-toss with an arm-drag. Ember sweeps then kicks Liv down, cover, ONE. Ember grabs Liv in a facelock, but Sarah coaches Liv up. Liv slips out to rock Ember with a right! Liv puts the headlock back on, and gives a noogie. Ember endures, but Liv gets the takeover. Ember sits up and rolls Liv off. Liv sings but Ember springboards to crossbody! Cover, TWO! Liv rolls away while we go to break.

Raw returns and Liv thrashes Ember around in a full nelson. Fans rally and Ember gets up. Ember breaks free with butt bumps, then slips down to roll Liv into an ankle lock! But Liv throws Ember into ropes! Then she rocks Ember with an enziguri! Cover, TWO, and Liv grows frustrated. She slams Ember’s face off the mat, then drags her back into the full nelson. Liv thrashes Ember around again, but fans still rally. Ember powers up again and arm-drags Liv off. Liv comes back with a forearm, but so does Ember. Liv backs Ember down and knocks her off her feet! She stalks Ember, then drags her up. “You are nothing!” Liv goes for a bulldog, but Ember puts Liv into buckles, then STOMPS her! Ember throws Liv to the center, then climbs up. Sarah panics, ECLIPSE!! Cover, Ember wins!

Winner: Ember Moon, by pinfall

Sarah rushes the ring, but Ember gets away. The Squad is furious, but the Moon rises higher and higher. Can Ember reach the top and challenge the champion in the future?

 

Raw looks at more of the friendship counseling between Sasha, Bayley & Dr. Shelby.

The doctor seems to be at his wit’s end already, and this is just the first day. They spent hours, can they just go? It’s clearly not working. Shelby says we know how Sasha feels, but how doe sBayley feel? But Bayley can’t answer, it’s Sasha’s role to play. It will be role-playing, Sasha is Bayley and Bayley is Sasha. So how doe s”Bayley” feel? Sasha puts on her best Bayley and says “when I grow up, I’m gonna be a champion! Not because I deserve it, but because I collected a bunch of autographs!” Bayley acts like she’s five and is everyone’s friend, and loves hugs, yay~! Okay… So how does “Sasha” feel to hear that?

Bayley puts on Sasha’s jewelry and says that if no one calls her the The Boss, she’ll stab you in the back. If you get ahead of her, she stabs you in the back! It doesn’t matter, she’ll just stab you in the back! And her neighbor’s mailman’s cousin is Snoop Dog! The Boss~! Is that funny? They argue again, but Shelby tries to bring up the principles of friendship. They both tell him to shut up, so he loses his cool! Will this ever sort itself out?

 

Bobby Lashley & Roman Reigns VS The Revival!

It may be the third time around, but that’s just to prove the #TopGuys didn’t win on a fluke. Of course, this time won’t exactly be fair with Dash & Dawson beating Roman up earlier. Will they get a guaranteed win tonight over Roman & Lashley? Or will Roman personally see to them not making it out of the ring?

Lashley lets Roman start, and Dawson circles with The Big Dog. Fans duel again as Roman and Dawson tie up. Roman powers Dawson to a corner, but then Roman gets back as Dawson tries to sucker punch the ribs. Dawson talks strategy with Dash before getting Roman in a waistlock then wristlock. Roman reverses, and puts on a headlock. Dawson fights back with body shots, then kicks. Dawson keeps on Roman’s ribs, which he and Dash beat up to begin with. Roman hits back with uppercuts and haymakers, sending Dawson out of the ring. The #TopGuys regroup, but Lashley wants in. Roman refuses, his pride/ego won’t let him. Dawson returns, and Dash flanks him from the outside. The ref keeps Dash back but Dawson gets Roman with body shots!

Dawson tags Dash in but Roman fights back. Roman throws Dawson out, but Dash drops him with a dropkick. Dash knees Roman in the ribs at the ropes, and Lashley knew this was going to happen. Dash stomps away, then tags Dawson. They drag Roman to the apron for Dawson to club away at those ribs. Dawson brings Roman back up and in, then kicks the ribs. Fans chant for Bobby, but Dawson puts Roman in body scissors. Dawson also grinds his forearm into Roman’s face and traps the arms so Roman can’t grab ropes. Roman endures the squeeze, but he won’t give up. Fans rally, and Roman gets up. Roman hits back, but Dawson shoves. Dawson’s hip-toss is blocked, so he lariats Roman down. Tag to Dash, human weapon leg drop! Cover, TWO, but very close. Lashley grows concerned, more for his own win-loss record than Roman’s ribs.

Dash keeps on Roman, then tags Dawson in. Dawson kicks but Roman blocks to throw a haymaker. Roman keeps throwing hands, then whips. Dawson reverses the whip and kicks Roman in the ribs again. Dawson whips but Roman reverses to send Dawson into buckles! Fans cheer for Lashley, but Roman refuses to tag. Dash tags in but runs into the leaping lariat. Dawson gets a guillotine leg drop before he can get in! Roll up on Roman, TWO! SUPERMAN PUNCH! Cover, but Dawson breaks it. Lashley decides to just come in! He gives Dawson a spinebuster, then throws Dash out before giving Dawson another spinebuster! Lashley returns to the corner and wants the tag, but Roman still refuses. Roman aims at Dash, goes to howl, but Dawson grabs his leg! The Revival swarm on Roman in the corner! The referee rings the bell!

Winners: Reigns & Lashley, by disqualification

Dash & Dawson keep stomping Roman, but Lashley leaves him?! Lashley told Roman his ego would do this to him, so he lets it happen. Roman gets another SHATTER MACHINE! Then, a SUPER Splash! The Alpha Male lets the Big Dog suffer for his own ego. He and Roman still get the win in the record books, but we all know the truth. Can Roman recover if he ever wants to run His Yard again?

 

Kevin brings the “chaos” up to Angle.

This can’t keep happening. The first thing to do: cancel his match with Strowman. He’s right, right? No, that match is still on. Kevin can help Angle organize his office! Or get him Shania Twain tickets! He’s friends with her, you know. Kevin is not getting out of his match. Fine! You don’t deserve Shania tickets. Kevin storms off, preparing for the worst.

 

Angle meets with Roman.

Roman wants to know what he has to do? Don’t worry, the match is set. Lashley asked for this match, too. Then they better start looking for a replacement, because Roman is going to lay Lashley’s “punk ass” out.

 

Mojo Rawley VS No Way Jose!

The man with #KillerInstinct refused this rematch last week, but after sucker punching the Fighting Fiesta, seems both men have no way around it. But Mojo says he made himself clear last week. Mojo paid the price already just to lace up his boots in a WWE ring. And what does Mojo do with the same opportunity? He dances and dances. So they’re just supposed to have a rematch? No way, Jose. Jose swings but Mojo knocks him down again! Then he goes up to the conga line, grabs the guy in a cheeseburger costume, and throws him! Then the POUNCE! That wasn’t Todd, but still.

Jose goes after Mojo again, but is rammed into the LED apron again and again and again! Mojo finishes it with a choke slam to the apron! He leaves Jose and the cheeseburger down and out. Will Mojo continue to show no mercy to anyone undeserving?

 

Exclusive interview with Ronda Rousey.

While the Baddest Woman on the Planet is suspended for 30 days, she can still talk. She’s excited to hear Alexa Bliss has to defend against Nia Jax. Ronda won’t have to stay away from a PPV, she promises to be front row at Extreme Rules!

 

Mickie James w/ Alexa Bliss VS Nia Jax!

The Goddess is running out of time before having to face the Irresistible Force, as well as having Ronda on the sidelines from the suspension. Can the six-time former champion soften the challenger up for Alexa? Or is she just a lamb being led to slaughter for the Goddess’ sake?

Nia knows when she defeated Alexa back at Wrestlemania, she thought she was done with Alexa. But she wasn’t. Then when she squashed Alexa at Backlash, that should’ve been the end. But wrong again. Then, the “legal” MITB cash-in brings us back to square one. “But this needs to end.” At Extreme Rules, with Ronda ringside, it will. In fact, Angle made their rematch… Oh yes, AN EXTREME RULES MATCH! But tonight, Mickie brought the little pest out here with her. Nia brought some back-up, too! It’s Natty! Will the Queen of Harts keep the “pesky” Goddess out of this match?

The bell rings and Mickie throws hands on Nia, but Nia shoves her away. Mickie kicks and throws more hands, but Nia headbutts her down. Mickie tries a third time, but Nia powers her into buckles. Nia squashes Mickie, then throws her across the way. Mickie crawls to ropes, but Nia is on her. Mickie elbows and kicks Nia back, then runs, but into the bulldozing! Nia stalks Mickie but Mickie gets to the apron. Nia swipes at Mickie but Mickie gets away to the barriers. Mickie tries to run when Nia pursues, but Nia grabs her and brings her into a fireman’s carry. Alexa saves Mickie but Natty reinforces Nia. It’s a stand-off while we go to break.

Raw returns and Mickie has Nia down and out on the outside. Nia climbs up but Mickie baseball slides Nia back down. Mickie goes after the leg with swift kicks, then gets back into the ring. Nia slowly gets in and still beats the count at 8. Mickie goes after the leg more, and Alexa mocks Nia’s pain. Fans rally while Nia endures more kicks. Nia puts Mickie in a corner but Mickie hits back again. Mickie kicks and kicks, keeping Nia down on her knees. Nia pushes Mickie but Mickie keeps kicking. Mickie runs and dropkicks Nia’s legs out! Mickie has Nia in a corner, and hotshots the leg! Nia writhes in pain, but Natty keeps the fans rallying. Mickie grabs the leg to drop an elbow on the knee. Nia endures and clubs Mickie back.

Nia grabs hair but Mickie grinds her elbow into the knee. They keep fighting on the mat. Nia gets Mickie in body scissors! Fans rally as Nia squeezes Mickie. Mickie reaches ropes and gets the ropebreak. Nia holds on but lets go at 4. Mickie throws hands but Nia gives a headbutt. Nia rallies with lariats, then pulls Mickie up. She shrieks as she puts Mickie in a corner, but she runs into boots. Mickie goes for the Mick-canrana, but Nia blocks. Mickie pops out and kicks the legs again. She aims at Nia, swings the kick, but Nia blocks it! Mickie slaps Nia, but Nia brings her up for the sit-out powerbomb! Alexa distracts the ref, so Natty trips her up! Nia sneers at Alexa, then goes back to Mickie, Samoan Drop! Cover, Nia wins!

Winner: Nia Jax, by pinfall

The Irresistible Force toughs it out, and with a little help from her friend, she stands tall. With the rules brought to their extreme, does Alexa stand a chance against her archenemy?

 

Kevin is trying, but it’s not working.

Why isn’t his meditating working? Jinder Mahal explains, but Kevin just can’t get it. Find inner peace. You must repeat the mantra. But he doesn’t want to. Charly comes over and asks if he’s shaken up. Kevin isn’t shaken! Just surprised by her is all. Kevin is glad he’s facing Strowman tonight! He is? Yes! Why would he be shaken up> Just because Strowman looks at him like a slab of bacon? Some people would be terrified of a monster, but Kevin’s faced the monster before. Kevin feels he knows everything about the monster now. He’ll go in that ring, and show the world how you destroy a monster! He goes back to meditating with Mahal, will it be enough to prepare for Strowman?

 

Backstage interview with Bobby Lashley.

How does he feel about getting Roman reigns in a match at Extreme Rules? We all saw it, Roman was feeding his own ego not tagging out. Roman got what he deserved in that tag match. The only reason Roman got what he’s gotten is because Lashley hasn’t been here. Roman’s “yard” would’ve just been a concrete patch in a trailer park. Will Lashley take over the Yard as the new Guy? Or will Roman reaffirm his Empire?

 

Kevin Owens VS Braun Strowman!

The Prizefighter wanted to be a friend, but when Strowman refused, he no longer wanted a thing to do with the #MonsterintheBank. The problem is, Strowman isn’t finished with Kevin, as he literally flipped Kevin’s car with his bare hands. Win or lose, will they be finished after tonight?

Raw returns one more time, and this match begins. Kevin fires up and ties up with Strowman, but Strowman just shoves him to a corner. Strowman roars, so Kevin bails out. Kevin hears the ring count begin, and he runs away! And he doesn’t come back. The count hits 10, Strowman wins!

Winner: Braun Strowman, by count out

But Strowman is now in hot pursuit! Kevin hurries to get out of the building and back to his car. But where are his keys?! He likely left them with his luggage in the locker room. Kevin isn’t sure what to do, so he tries to find a hiding place. He has no choice: portapotty. Strowman traces Kevin’s steps, but can’t find him. The valet attendant runs away, but Strowman keeps searching. Strowman walks down the parking lot, but can’t find Kevin. Fans chant “portapotty!” in hopes he hears. Strowman searches more, but that’s when he smells something. He smells Kevin’s fear! And more other things…? “Anybody in there?” “Go away.” So Strowman tapes up the portapotty! “I told you I’d find you!” Kevin panics and begs for mercy, but Strowman pulls the portapotty around, into the arena!

Kevin continues to beg, but he can’t do a thing as Strowman pulls the potty along. Strowman goes all the way back to ringside, knocking down anything in his way. Strowman shakes the portapotty, then drags it up to the stage. Kevin continues to beg, but Strowman ignores him. Strowman brings the portapotty across the stage, then makes sure Kevin is still conscious in there. He shoves the portapotty closer to the edge, but not all the way over. Strowman backs away, and fans know what’s coming next. Strowman runs at the portapotty and RAMS it off the stage!!

Kevin is likely battered, bruised and a mess… Fans fitting chant “holy sh*t!” The Monster looks down upon Kevin as security and medics drag him out of the wreckage and waste. Between the pain and the humiliation, will Kevin ever show his face around Raw again?

 

 

My Thoughts:

I think Raw has relapsed to the lackluster stuff from last year. Like, I think last Summer was just as bad for Raw as this Summer has been. As if fans didn’t have enough reason to dislike Roman being shoved down our throats, he gets a double-header tonight given his stories crossing over. Him having a match with Rollins against McIntyre-Ziggler would’ve been good instead of yet another team-up with Lashley, and to his character’s credit, Roman said as much. But Angle insisted and we got a double dose of The Big Dog. Though it also went in character for The Revival to attack. I just wish Roman had stayed out of the second match for whatever reason, like he was that beat up or Angle thought better of it. But at least we get Lashley VS Roman for the sake of pride.

The B Team is on the weirdest roll. Axel goes up 2-0 on Hardy (likely meant to be Bo VS Bray if Bray didn’t get in that car accident), but there’s still time before their title match. I still don’t think B Team will win, but if they do, holy crap that’d be shocking. Meanwhile, it was a given that the AoP were going to win against Titus Worldwide. I hope for AoP’s sake that they’re in the title scene going towards Summerslam, even if it’s in a crazy free-for-all with The Revival and I guess even Ziggler-McIntyre. Another unfortunate accident was Ruby Riott’s, hers might be a bit more serious. Liv & Sarah still hold their own as an act, but going by how Ember won tonight, their numbers game is obviously their strong suit, and being a woman down, it won’t work as well as it used to.

Hooray for having Dr. Shelby back to help Bayley & Sasha. Though, unlike Team Hell No uniting, this will (and should) have a complete meltdown and we get an Extreme Rules match. I was hoping this would be the one to be the Extreme Rules match, but that goes to Nia VS Alexa with Ronda in the front row, so that Ronda can get involved without the match being thrown out. Extreme Rules really should just be a PPV where all matches are No DQ by default, but WWE doesn’t want to risk (more) injuries. Nia and Mickie did great tonight, and if the team of Nia & Natty holds up, possible team for a possible Women’s Tag Division? Lastly, Strowman and Kevin basically save the night with that “match” and the portapotty spot at the end there. I bet they’ll have another match at the PPV that Kevin again won’t want.

My Score: 7.8/10


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Mitchell’s ROH Death Before Dishonor Results & Report! (7/26/24)

YEEHAW!

Published

28 mins ago

on

July 26, 2024

By

The word of the day is, “Gold!”

ROH brings Death Before Dishonor to Texas, and makes it bigger than ever! SIX championship matches, how drastically will the landscape change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – MXM Collection VS Spanish Announce Project; wins.
  • Komander VS The Beast Mortos; wins.
  • Texas Deathmatch: Leyla Hirsch VS Diamante; wins.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championship Qualifier: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS The Dark Order; wins and advances to Battle of the Belts 11.
  • ROH World Tag Team Championships: The Kingdom VS Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O’Reilly; win(s) and
  • ROH World Television Championship Survival of the Fittest: Atlantis Jr. VS Lio Rush VS Shane Taylor VS Johnny TV VS Lee Johnson VS Brian Cage; wins and
  • ROH Pure Championship: Wheeler Yuta VS Lee Moriarty; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship: Billie Starkz VS Red Velvet; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Championship: Athena VS Queen Aminata; wins and
  • ROH World Championship: Mark Briscoe VS Roderick Strong; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 7.25.2024

Slammiversary Fallout! Where do things go on the way to Victory Road?

Published

20 hours ago

on

July 25, 2024

By

Well now we start the fall out of Slammiversary. Josh Alexander in his bad bitch summer, X-Speedball legacy, ABC got the t-a-g and Jordynne is still in charge of the Knockouts division. Like I said at the end of Slammiversary, all of the champions being Babyfaces is stupid. They need to drop a couple titles fairly quickly, because I don’t care what some people say, Nic Nemeth ain’t gonna bring any eyes to the brand. He’s about as hot as day old Hamburger Helper over a camping sterno.

We’ll probably open with the luke warm champion, so tune in like 10 minutes late for anything of substance to be happen.

https://x.com/i/status/1816629254349533588

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner: Maclin wins via KIA – *
  • AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan: AJ wins via Down Payment – **
  • Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young): Hammer Your ASH wins via Torture Rack – ** 1/2
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey): Broken Alphabet wins via Twist & Splash – ***

 

Results:

Nemeth gives the ole “I’ll be a fighting champion…blah blah” promo and drops the “any company” line that we’ve already understood what that means. Campaign Singh cuts him off…and I never thought I’d be happy for Campaign Singh to walk out and say anything…ever. And…Mustafa’s promo is worse than Dolph’s. He’s gone from parody to caricature even saying “it was the biggest screw job Montreal ever saw”. Like some of these lines are cheap heat, but most are just brain dead comments that wouldn’t get a reaction out of anyone (and the crowd was silent for that comment). Mustafa gets caught in an Archer “phrasing” moment about getting screwed hard, but this is painful. Promos written by 14 year olds everyone…

This ends with Ali challenging Nemeth for the World Title. While I’m not against walk up challenges, I watch Japanese wrestling, I don’t really get the point aside from doing it just to do it. 

ABC and Matt Hardy have a small promo, and I’m still not really a fan of Unbroken Matt Version 6.0. The floating between Broken voice and his normal voice sounds amateurish.

OH LOOK, finally a match 20 minutes into the show. And it’s my son Steve Maclin! OH CHRIST he’s facing Deaner. This has been 25 minutes of talking followed by the worst god damn attempt at a gimmick. Deaner’s little “Papa Santino told me I can wipe my ass only if the crowd agrees”. This gimmick should die in a fire.

Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner

Deaner started off quick because Maclin was in disbelief that Deaner was actually gonna fight him. Maclin dodges a Crossbody, Busaiku Knee, and just starts beating on Deaner for fun. And this is fun, maybe Maclin can make sure Deaner gets stretchered out and written off forever. How do you call for an ambulance in French? Maclin with the old Back Breaker into a stretch. Deaner tries to nerd rage up, breaks the Back Breaker Stretch, his punch combo, into a Manhattan Drop and Bulldog. Deaner hits the Crossbody, but Maclin kicks out. This is entirely too competitive.

Deaner goes for the Deaner DDT, blocked, Olympic Slam into Splashing Deaner into the corner, Caught in the Crosshairs, K-I-A, thanks for coming you damn dweeb. Stay in Canada and don’t travel Deaner, please.

https://x.com/i/status/1816633784537874761

AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan

As the bell sounds, Sami knocks Rich off the apron, Low Bridges AJ, does the Beats of the Bodhran on AJ and then AJ eats the offense and strategizes with his crew. Bishop and Rich swarm the ring, Sami allows himself to get distracted so AJ slides in and starts beating on Sami. AJ throats Sami across the middle rope and Rich makes his presence felt, AJ distracts the referee and Rich gets in a lot of cheap shots. Bishop throws Sami back in the ring, and AJ keeps up the pressure. Lots of 5 count chokes and leverage moves. After the commercial break ends, Sami dodges a Tennessee Whiskey Knee, gets in a few shots before Rich trips Sami as he’s setting up a Dive, and then AJ takes advantage of the position and hits the goofball knee strike.

AJ calls for his Chokeslam, Sami tries to break it with Axe Handles, then claws the eyes. Sami goes for a Scoop Slam, gets him part way up and then falls over. AJ Chokeslam again, but he bites his hand and starts fighting back. Launches himself at AJ, sends him bouncing off the ropes and uses the momentum to hit that Scoop Slam that was teased earlier. Sami goes for a Western Lariat but eats a Big Boot. AJ does a little Hulk Hogan pose to signal a Leg Drop, but Sami dodges and then connects on a Sliding Lariat. Thumbs Up, Thumbs….interference. Rich distracts the ref, Bishop lays out Sami, AJ connects with the Down Payment.

Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young)

ASH and Jordynne exchange slaps and then Jordynne starts to out muscle ASH. Spinebuster from Jordynne, Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights off, rope run, Sattelite DDT into both tagging out. EY does the Flair corner flop, slides back in between Hammer’s legs, and connects on a Neckbreaker. EY is the quicker of the two, but Hammer finally gets his hands on him and a Release Belly to Belly into a full mount raining of fists, then a near fall. Hammer smashes EY in a corner, Arm Wringer into an Irish Whip across, but EY moves and Hammer tags out to ASH. ASH levels Jordynne, peppers EY with a few shots and pulls him back to their corner and starts some tandem offense with Hammerman. Hammer Guerilla Presses ASH and throws her into EY for a near fall. Hammer looks to aim for either a Powerbomb or Nightmare Pendulum, but EY drops it into a Small Package, pinfall kick out, they both run, Double Lariat spot. The Knockouts get tagged in.

Jordynne is in control early, World’s Strongest Slam into a Vader Bomb. Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights it off and tags out to Hammer. Jordynne and EY do some schoolyard stuff with the old Push while Jordynne is down to trip Hammer. All four get in, ASH gets leveled, EY gets leveled, Hammer and Jordynne have a brief face off, but Hammer throws Jordynne to the apron and ASH connects with a Meteora from the apron. Death Valley Driver from Young on Hammer, ASH stares in shock, EY tells her to get, ASH runs away. EY goes up for his Macho Elbow, and ASH causes him to fall to Hammer’s feet, Torture Rack, and EY submits.

Josh Alexander comes out, with new heel music. And it’s not that bad, definitely better than some other people’s new music. Josh yells at the crowd a bit, says he can’t wait til he’s back in a real Canadian town, like his home of Toronto. Then he drops the mic in lieu of an explanation. The crowd chants him off with the “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey”. 

https://x.com/i/status/1816647373654724937

The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey)

JDC and Hardy start, but JDC quickly tags out to Myers and that doesn’t go well. Hardy grabs a hold of Myers, a few Delete chops, drags him to his corner and they all get in a few shots punctuated with Hardy getting tagged back in and an Elbow into Myers’ extended and worked on left arm. Myers stays isolated, back into the corner, Boot to the gut, Ace tags in and wallops Myers. Ace connects on Double Kicks, into Russian Leg Sweep and his half of Click Click Boom, for a 2 count. Myers finally gets free with a Jaw Breaker and tags out to Eddie. But The System gets no momentum, Ace stifles Eddie’s offense and starts a few quick tags with him and Bey for tandem offense. Moose finally comes down the ramp as Eddie kicked out of yet another pinfall attempt because The System has had nothing going for them. Eddie finally gets some offense since Moose was a big enough distraction.

Eddie thinks they have a spot, so he tags back in JDC, but The ABC stop him cold, tag in Matt Hardy, and Matt walks down JDC, but JDC Low Bridges. Matt is on the outside, so all of The System surrounds Hardy, then Joe Hendry’s music hits! That stops the heel beatdown, and we follow Hendry’s entire entrance. So that proves Hendry is bigger than the 8 other people in this frame. Not really sure if that’s optics you want to push along. Ace and JDC try to remind people there’s wrestling going on, but JDC thumbs the eye to get a little something going. Vertical Suplex for a near fall, tag out for Eddie and Eddie lights up Ace with some of those NOAH Chops. Ace retreats to the ropes and Alisha chokes him with the ropes while the ref is distracted.

Myers gets tagged in, Ace tries to use the crowd energy, Myers stops it at first but then Ace slips a Scoop Slam and tags out to Bey. Hot tag, strike rush, Double Stomp, educated feet, Leap Frog to the corner but Lish climbs on the apron and yells at Bey which stops his rhythm. Myers kicks his feet out and causes Bey to crash. Eddie tags in for a few shots, then to JDC and Slingshot Knees, Wringer Snapmare, Bow and Arrow Submission, and JDC is just doing solid wrestling work right now. Uppercut between the Shoulder Blades as Bey tries to get out, tag to Myers and Bey is still eating offense. Eddie tags in, Bey tries the Sunset Flip, but Eddie tags out before going over, so Myers folds up Bey for a near fall and then tags out to JDC who connects on a Standing Suplex, slams Bey’s face into the corner, Eddie tags in, and Bey finally fights up to his feet, Eddie just flatten Bey’s comeback, tries a Tiger Driver but eats an Enzuigiri for a simultaneous tag. JDC and Hardy come in, JDC tries to exit halfway in, but Hardy is wrecking shop. He disposes of Eddie, Myers slides in but eats a tandem Neckbreaker/DDT from Hardy. Face team does the Delete Corner Face Smashes. Poetry in Motion into a Side Effect into Corkscrew Swanton for only 2 since Myers breaks it up! Everyone throwing hands, referee is distracted, Moose comes in to Spear Hardy, but Hardy dodges and throws him into JDC (I get the call back), Hendry then lays out Moose with the big Lariat. Twist of Fate from Hardy, Splash from Bey, Broken Alphabet wins!

 

Overall Score: 4/10

Ugh, cliche promos, too damn much talking, a competitive squash match with an imbecile as our first “match”, into an overbooked and slow heel match, finally a decent tag match (with the right team going over), into another overbooked match with a “tease” for the mystery backup being more obvious than Jericho’s WWF debut.

Aside from the afore mentioned tag match, The Rascalz promo and The System Promo; this was hard to watch. A lot of cornball promos, Rosemary licks her conspiracy board, storylines got zero traction. Whoopity Doo, Ryan Nemeth got a match next week and we get an undead wedding.

While this was a bad episode, it was bad by at least new standards. We’re not back in the TNA Dark Days again, but this was…a useless show.


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