Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE NXT Results & Report! (1/23/19)

Published

5 years ago

January 23, 2019

NXT TakeOver: Phoenix is days away, and Johnny Wrestling looks to call out the One and Only! Will Ricochet make him regret being so bold?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

Oney Lorcan & Danny Burch VS Fabian Aichner & Marcel Barthel; Lorcan and Burch win.
Kairi Sane & Io Shirai VS Tanea Brooks & Amber Nova; Sane & Shirai win.
Velveteen Dream VS Bobby Fish w/ Adam Cole; Dream wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

The Velveteen Dream returns!

Full Sail gives the Patrick Clark Experience an ovation as he makes his way to the ring. Dream picks up a mic as he hears out the fans on their cheering. Now he doesn’t know if they know it, but he has a little sparkle in his eyes. Dream has something special in his sights. Correct him if he’s wrong, but Full Sail knows Dream waits for no man. If Full Sail really knew Dream, they’d now this sparkle is the sparkle of title gold. Specifically, the North American Championship. It is high time that Dream reign supreme. But wait, the Undisputed Era appears!

Adam Cole tells Dream to “pump the breaks”. Everyone knows that 2019 will be the Year of the Undisputed. They vow to not have just one but all the belts! Roderick Strong and Kyle O’Reilly prepare for a tag team title defense at TakeOver but Cole and Fish are without titles. They don’t like showing up to parties empty handed, so both of them will have gold very soon, baybay. As for Dream, he can continue to #DreamOn. Bobby Fish says “Shame on you, Dream”, getting the fans all excited. Fans say “Shut Up, Bobby!” But Fish says Dream needs to learn to live in reality. 2019 will continue to be the Undisputed Era, and that itself is Undisputed.

Dream wishes to dispute that claim, but only if it’s okay with Cole. Fish gets mad and rushes Dream but is thrown right out. Cole gets the same, and Dream slips away. Dream mocks Cole’s pose, baybay, but will he be able to keep Fish and Cole behind him in the line to the North American Championship?

NXT looks toward the Women’s Championship match.

The Queen of Spades is “more dangerous than ever” as a two-time champion, but The EST is clearly not impressed nor intimidated. Shayna Baszler says no one can stand her as champion, because they can’t do a thing to stop her. However, Bianca Belair is the strongest, toughest, fastest, and boldest. But she also vows to prove she’s the best. Shayna had a great 2018 and has made history, but she’s Shayna Two-Time because she lost. Bianca is Un-De-Fea-Ted, and that won’t change in Phoenix. Shayna made this title mean something, she made this title a symbol of a threat. The MMA Horsewomen support each other and always will.

Bianca doesn’t care if it’s one or three, she’ll take them all out to get the title. Shayna doesn’t care if Bianca is stronger, faster or any of that, everyone needs air to breathe. Bianca thrives under pressure, and Shayna is going to put a lot of pressure on her. Who shines brightest in Phoenix?

Oney Lorcan & Danny Burch VS Fabian Aichner & Marcel Barthel!

It’s a crossover between NXT America and NXT UK as the One Two Combo meets the European Alliance! Will Lorcan & Burch punch their way to NXT (America) Tag Team Champion contention? Or will Aichner & Barthel use this win for contention in both brands?

Fans duel “One Two!” “NEIN!” as Barthel and Lorcan start. They circle and feel it out, and Lorcan gets the wrist. Barthel breaks free to chop but Lorcan chops back. Barthel kicks low and hammers away in the corner. He tags to Aichner and Barthel feeds Lorcan to a tilt-o-whirl backbreaker! Cover, TWO! Aichner puts Lorcan back in the Euro corner and tags Barthel. They stomp a mudhole but back off at 4. Barthel drags Lorcan up for haymakers then tags to Aichner. They double whip but Lorcan goes through to escape, tag to Burch! The Governa rallise on the Euros with haymakers and elbows! He gives lariats to Aichner then whips, but Aichner reverses. Aichner leaps but gets a leg pick! Barthel runs into a headbutt! Burch fires off on Aichner, then rolls him to leap, big missile dropkick! Burch fires up as he kips up and fans cheer.

Tag to Lorcan and the One Two go for the finish. Barthel saves Aichner and throws Lorcan into Burch. Air Raid Crash for Burch, but Lorcan throws Barthel out. Aichner grabs Lorcan but gets European Uppercuts! Lorcan runs but into a HUGE clothesline! Aichner drags Lorcan up to his corner, tag to Barthel, and they put Lorcan up top. Tag back to Aichner before a kick and a toss to the brainbuster! Barthel DIVES onto Burch, Aichner triangle moonsaults onto Lorcan! Cover, TWO!! Lorcan lives and fans are loving this. Aichner drags Lorcan over and Barthel climbs. Powerbomb lift, EuroUpper Bomb! But Lorcan rolls through to roll Aichner into the Half Boston Crab! Aichner endures and Burch intercepts Barthel. Barthel breaks free to rock Burch then enziguri Lorcan! Burch clobbers Barthel but Aichner boots Burch! Fans are thunderous as Aichner drags Lorcan up.

Lorcan grabs Aichner to slap, slap, SLAP!! Running EuroUpper! Lorcan FLIES onto Barthel and Burch! Fans reach a fever pitch as Aichner triangle FLIES onto everyone!! Full Sail loves this as Aichner springboards. Lorcan ducks and rolls him up, Burch holds Barthel back, Lorcan & Burch win!!

Winners: Oney Lorcan & Danny Burch, Lorcan pinning

Fast and furious is an understatement for this match! The One Two gets it down, will this position them for another NXT Tag Team Championship match after Phoenix?

NXT looks toward to the top championship match, Ciampa VS Black.

The Psycho Killer quotes the old saying, “The title doesn’t make the man, the man makes the title.” Ciampa claimed Aleister Black was proof of the reverse. Because ever since losing the title, the Embodiment of the End hasn’t been the same. Ciampa makes the title what it is, and he is who makes NXT the TOP show. “Why can’t anybody dethrone Ciampa?” Because he wants it more than everyone else. IT takes a certain kind of man to scratch and claw to reach the top, but it takes an even stronger man to build a home there. Aleister was shoved into an abyss but he climbed his way back out. There are many who get lost in the frenzy of their rage, but he focuses it as a stream targeted at his enemies.

Aleister absolved Johnny Gargano of the sins that the puppet master put upon him. Ciampa has manipulated Johnny Wrestling but Aleister tells Ciampa to hold his beloved title closely. Aleister will come back for what is rightfully his. Ciampa says he has overshadowed Aleister time and again. Aleister vows to cut the strings but Ciampa vows to continue his reign. Will Aleister take the title along with Ciampa’s pride? Or will Ciampa’s days continue to be numbered and counting?

Kairi Sane & Io Shirai VS Tanea Brooks & Amber Nova!

The Pirate Princess and Genius of the Sky have been friends since Stardom, and now they combine forces here in NXT to make a tag team debut! Will the stars align as sea and sky meet at the horizon?

Teams sort out and Shirai starts against Nova. They circle as fans cheer on Team Stardom. Shirai waistlocks but Nova standing switches. Shirai reverses to a wristlock and headlock but Nova powers out. Things speed up and Shirai handsprings past Nova to dropkick her down. Fans fire up with Shirai as she tags Kairi. Stardom combines for a double whip and CHOP! They roll Nova to her feet to then whip her again. Nova has to hop over Kairi and gets tripped up by Shirai. Kairi hits Nova with the running blockbuster! Fans fire up with Kairi as she marches the plank. Kairi runs corner to corner for the Sliding D!

Kairi climbs up but Brooks distracts. Nova capitalizes with a forearm, then tags Brooks in. Brooks brings Kairi around for big knees, and says “You’re welcome.” She knees Kairi more, then suplexes Kairi up. Kairi slips out and shoves Brooks to then go perpendicular and hit the Interceptor! Tag to Shirai and she fires off forearms. Shirai sits Brooks up for a basement dropkick! Brooks gets to ropes but gets a Shirai-1-9! Nova runs in but into forearms! Shirai springboards and hits them both with a dropkick! Tag to Kairi and Stardom combines on Brooks. Spinebuster sets up the alley-oop elbow drop! Then assisted moonsault! Cover, Team Stardom wins!

Winners: Io Shirai & Kairi Sane, Sane pinning

The stars shine and the best friends celebrate with a hug. Will they fly high enough to set sail for those WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships on the main roster?

Backstage interview with Sane & Shirai.

Kairi says that she and her best friend are going to take care of business together. Shirai says there’s no one that can stop this combination! But Jessamyn Duke and Marina Shafir thinks that’s “adorable.” They welcome Kairi back from her “adventure”, but promise to send them both back out to sea. Will the MMA Horsewomen sink the Pirate Princess and pal? Or will they be the ones seeing stars after their match?

Velveteen Dream VS Bobby Fish w/ Adam Cole!

Johnny Wrestling may get a crack at the King of Flight in Phoenix, but the line for contenders doesn’t stop there. Will the Infamous One have an Experience tonight? Or will Velveteen have to #DreamOn about challenging the North American Champion down the road?

The bell rings and Dream circles with Fish. Fish tests with kicks but Cole creeps up. Dream sees the sneak attack coming and elbows Fish away. Fish hits back but Dream ducks the roundhouse. Dream keeps his eyes on Cole as he avoids Fish’s feet. Fish and Dream go around and Dream blocks the kick. Dream swivels the hips but Fish grabs him in a headlock. Dream powers out but Fish runs him over. Fish runs into a fireman’s carry but slips out! Fish shoves but Dream turns around to dropkick him down! Dream keeps Cole back, but walks into Fish’s boot. Fish kicks but misses, Dream springboards for ax handles! Cover, but Fish scrambles away. Fish and Cole regroup, but Dream slingshots out. They get clear and Dream lands on the apron.

Dream leaps over the sweep, then triangle dropkicks Fish down! Fans fire up for Dream while Cole helps Fish get up. Dream hops up quick and LEAPS! Big ax handles take Fish out and Dream returns to the ring to soak up the cheers. Cole shouts for Fish to get up but Dream comes out to keep Cole back. Dream fetches Fish into the ring, then drags him up for clubbing forearms. Fish hits back but Dream throws forearms. They brawl and Dream gets an edge with those heavy haymakers. Fish ducks and waistlocks but Dream elbows out. Cole distracts, Fish grabs a leg to drag Dream out! Fish kicks away on the other leg, then dragon screws Dream into the barriers! Dream clutches that leg while Fish returns to the ring. Fish comes back and kicks the bad leg.

Dream gets in the corner but can barely hobble. Fish stalks Dream and kicks out the bad leg. Fish drags Dream up for knees into the corner. He snapmares Dream then drops a slingshot senton. Cover, ONE! Fish keeps his focus as he stalks Dream to the ropes. Dream kicks at Fish with his good leg but Fish keeps coming. Fish kicks away on Dream’s bad leg in the corner, and Dream writhes in agony. Cole talks trash while Fish drags Dream. Dream grabs ropes then shoves Fish away! Dream hobbles but Fish chop blocks him down. Fish covers, TWO! Fish keeps his cool as he goes after the leg again. He rolls Dream over for the Half Crab! Dream endures as fans rally up.

Dream powers his way over and kicks Fish with the good leg. Fish staggers back and Dream stands, Fish walks into Dream’s knee! Dream hits Fish with another knee, then hops up for a missile dropkick! Cover, TWO! Cole coaches Fish up while he trash talks Dream. Fans are on Dream’s side as he throws big haymakers on Fish in the corner. The ref backs Dream off and Fish kicks out the bad leg! Fish stands, runs, but into a SPINEBUSTER! Dream hurries up top and Cole shouts for Fish to move. Dream leaps, Purple Rain Maker rolled through to a Kneebar! Fish has Dream flailing and reaching, but Dream endures. Fans give Dream strength to crawl for ropes, but Cole holds the ropes away! The ref doesn’t see it at first, but he catches Cole red handed!

Fish lets Dream go to plead with the referee, but Dream rolls Fish up! TWO, but Dream rolls Fish to a fireman’s carry! But the leg gives out! Fish runs in but Dream sends him out onto Cole! Fish hurries back in, but runs into Dream Valley Driver! Dream climbs up fast, takes aim, and hits Purple Rain Maker! Cover, Dream wins!!

Winner: Velveteen Dream, by pinfall

Even on one leg, Dream keeps his dreams alive! Will Dream prove things aren’t so undisputed by reaching the North American Championship first?

Ricochet heads to the ring!

The One and Only will defend his NXT North American Championship against Johnny Gargano in Phoenix, but he’s here tonight to answer Gargano calling him out. Ricochet has the mic and tells Gargano that “two weeks ago, you came out here and talked all this crap about being better.” But then five minutes later he goes and blindsides Ricochet with a superkick? Ricochet says 2019’s Gargano is the same Gargano from 2018. That is to say, 2018 Gargano simply showed his true colors. Gargano showed himself to be a selfish liar. But 2018 Ricochet showed his true colors, when he won gold. Ricochet showed everyone that he IS the One and Only, that he is something Gargano is not: a champion.

But speaking of Gargano, he heads to the ring! Gargano says “Wait a minute, Rick.” He knows Ricochet is trying to use Gargano’s emotions against him. 2018 Gargano would’ve rushed the ring like a mad man. But this is 2019 Gargano, and this Gargano always has a plan. And that plan is a sucker punch! But Ricochet saw it coming, and the brawl is on! Ricochet blocks the superkick to give a jumping knee! But Ciampa clobbers Ricochet from behind!? Is DIY working together again!? Gargano looks up at Ciampa and Full Sail chants “YES! YES!” Gargano goes after Ricochet as Ciampa applauds. But Aleister Black gets his hands on Ciampa! And then his feet as he stomps a mudhole! Gargano whips Ricochet into steel steps but Aleister stomps and boots away on Ciampa. Gargano saves Ciampa!? And SUPERKICKS Aleister!

Fans again chant “DIY! DIY!” as Gargano stands over Aleister. Ciampa goes after Aleister with a rain of rights, and Gargano goes after Ricochet with lefts! Gargano aims at Ricochet, slingshot DDT! Ciampa hits Aleister with a double underhook driver! DIY sits in silence a moment, then they leave, “Goldie” in Ciampa’s arms. Gargano and Ciampa stare down and fans want them to “Hug It Out!” DIY doesn’t hug, but they don’t fight. They don’t say a word as they both go up the ramp and stand on stage. Ciampa and Gargano are about to shake hands, when Candice LeRae appears! She will NOT let this happen, that is not who Gargano is anymore. Gargano comes to his senses, and leaves with Mrs. Wrestling. But is there anything anyone can do from both Ciampa and Gargano having the titles after TakeOver?

My Thoughts:

A great go-home to TakeOver: Phoenix! There were really good hype packages for the NXT Championship and NXT Women’s Championship matches. The presentation was good and the promos delivered were solid, but in the case of the women’s title, I still can’t be sure if Bianca stays Un-De-Fea-Ted to let the MMA Horsewomen go to main to join Ronda Rousey, or Shayna holds on so that Wrestlemania Weekend will be the moment a new champion is crowned. Kairi and Shirai did great in their tag team debut, and going against Jessamyn and Marina next week will serve as the next best thing to the Six Woman Tag I expected. Obviously things change when injuries happen, namely Dakota Kai’s. But whether 3v3 or 2v2, I’m thinking Kairi’s team wins for the same reasons as Bianca would defeat Shayna. Horsewomen VS Horsewomen is a route that WWE should take towards Summerslam 2019.

The NXT Tag Team Division continues to shock and amaze, as Lorcan & Burch VS Aichner & Barthel was incredible! This tag match, especially in this week of go-homes, shows that Raw could learn some things about booking even filler matches. There was nothing directly on the line for this match but the teams fought like there was. That is how Lucha House Party VS Mahal & The Singh Brothers should’ve been treated, but instead it was just throwing them all on TV so that they can all be on TV. Roderick Strong & Kyle O’Reilly were absent but Cole & Fish helped strengthen their story by saying they were too busy preparing to the title match. Raw doesn’t need to have everyone on TV but should have ways of feeding story even without them. The Singhs could’ve made note about Mahal preparing for the Rumble while they take on LHP in a great match.

Dream VS Fish w/ Cole was great, even with similar booking to how EC3 had to deal with the Undisputed Era hanging around. They made it unique with the story being told in the wrestling. I don’t know if Dream will get a title before Wrestlemania, but he’s got a lot of fans on his side. If Lars Sullivan can’t make a proper main roster debut, Dream may be used as an emergency substitute call-up. Dream is confident enough as a character and competitor, but there is also a concern of proper booking. Maybe Dream can go to SmackDown and EC3 can stay on Raw once the call-ups settle in. And perhaps it’d be for the best, as there’s a chance the titles will be tied up for a time.

The brawl of Aleister, Ricochet and Heel DIY was great, and with Candice coming out to say “No”, this reunion is certainly happening on the way to Mania. The title matches are still tricky to call but Heel DIY holding the singles titles at the same time sounds like a great way to go. And depending on how the NXT Tag Team Championships go, I would love a story of Heel DIY going back for the tag titles so that they will be the ones draped in gold. This can bring in War Raiders, Aleister, Ricochet and all of Undisputed Era into a crazy story to get titles in a mad dash that crosses all the Men’s Divisions.

My Score: 8.5/10

Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!

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Mitchell’s NJPW Wrestling Dontaku Results & Report! (5/3/24)

Will the Ace go global?

Published

56 mins ago

May 3, 2024

Steven Mitchell

He’s here to show the world, he’s here to show the world!

Nic Nemeth finally gets his dream match with Hiroshi Tanahashi, and the IWGP Global Heavyweight Championship is on the line! But can the Wanted Man trump President Ace of the Universe?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

Kickoff – Togi Makabe & Katsuya Murashima VS Boltin Oleg & Shoma Kato; Oleg & Kato win.
DOUKI & Taka Michinoku VS SHO & Yujiro Takahashi; Sho & Yujiro win.
Yuya Uemura & Taichi VS Great-O-Khan & Callum Newman; Yuya & Taichi win.
Six Man Tag: TMDK VS Guerrillas of Destiny; Guerrillas of Destiny win.
Six Man Tag: Ryusuke Taguchi, Hirooki Goto & Yoshi-Hashi VS Bullet Club; Bullet Club wins.
8 Man Tag: Los Ingobernables de Japon VS Bullet Club War Dogs; LIJ wins.
Six Man Tag: Jon Moxley, Shota Umino & El Desperado VS The House of Torture; The House of Torture wins.
NJPW World Television Championship: Zack Sabre Jr. VS Jeff Cobb; Cobb wins and becomes the new NJPW World Television Champion.
Yota Tsuji VS David Finlay; Finlay wins.
IWGP Global Heavyweight Championship: Nic Nemeth VS Hiroshi Tanahashi; Nemeth wins and retains the title.

PLAY BY PLAY

NJPW World Television Championship: Zack Sabre Jr. w/ TMDK VS Jeff Cobb w/ Great-O-Khan & Francesco Akira!

The Front Man and the Imperial Unit have battled over this belt before, and now, in “season 4,” we revisit the rivalry! Will ZSJ still have Cobb’s number? Or will Cobb finally be the star of NJPW World?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see who is truly might!

The bell rings and we’re on the clock. The fans cheer as ZSJ and Cobb shake hands. ZSJ then rushes in but Cobb avoids him. They feel things out, hand fight for control, and Cobb goes for a leg. ZSJ avoids being thrown but Cobb waistlocks. ZSJ drops, slips out, but Cobb keeps on him. They go around again, ZSJ gets away, and the fans cheer. The two knuckle lock, go forehead to forehead, then Cobb blocks a leg pick with a facelock. Cobb pushes ZSJ to a lateral press, TWO!! ZSJ narrowly escapes and Cobb lets him know it. The fans applaud as the two reset, and they feel things out again.

They knuckle lock, ZSJ rolls back and wrangles Cobb. Cobb stands, slips through to wrench back. ZSJ turns around, has a cording hold, and then hooks a leg to make the arm-drag easier! Then he shifts right around to an ARMBAR! Cobb scrambles to the ROPEBREAK! The fans cheer and ZSJ lets off quickly. ZSJ and Cobb reset, feel things out, and knuckle lock again. They go forehead to forehead, then shoulder to shoulder. ZSJ facelocks but Cobb slips around to a waistlock, then spins ZSJ to a facelock, then headlock. Cobb hits the takeover, denies the headscissors, but ZSJ keeps trying. Third time’s the charm and ZSJ has Cobb down!

ZSJ squeezes tight but Cobb moves around. Cobb headstands, pops free, and then has a standing toehold! The fans applaud, but ZSJ works on his escape. He gets his left leg free, turns over and reels Cobb in, but Cobb turns that into a waistlock! ZSJ wrenches out but Cobb avoids the Pele! Cobb feints moonsault and ZSJ scrambles away! The fans cheer the standoff as the two reset again. Cobb and ZSJ circle, step closer, and knuckle lock again. They both try to clinch, but then Cobb slips around to a waistlock and SLAM! ZSJ scrambles away, clutching his side. ZSJ stands, Cobb storms up, and Cobb TOSSES ZSJ across the ring!

The fans fire up while ZSJ flounders to the apron, still clutching his side. ZSJ seems alright to continue as he gets back inside, so Cobb storms up on him again. Cobb HEADBUTTS the ribs! Cobb whips corner to corner hard and ZSJ bounces off buckles! ZSJ is getting frustrated with himself, but Cobb is right on him again. Cobb whips ZSJ back the other way and ZSJ again hits buckles hard! The fans rally for ZSJ as Cobb storms over. Cobb steps on ZSJ’s chest! Cobb then drags ZSJ up at the five minute mark. Cobb whips, ZSJ goes up and comes back, but is caught into an OVERHEAD BELLY2BELLY!

Cobb walks over to pick ZSJ up, then whips him to a corner. Cobb runs in but ZSJ avoids the back elbow! ZSJ goes up and around to TORNADO DDT! Both men are down and the fans fire up! ZSJ stands but Cobb follows, and ZSJ UPPERCUTS! And UPPERCUTS! Cobb wobbles but ZSJ UPPERCUTS again! ZSJ fires a flurry of forearms, but Cobb DECKS him with just one! ZSJ is mad and he gets right up! The fans rally up as ZSJ UPPERCUTS again and again! Cobb ROCKS ZSJ with a forearm! ZSJ has the fans behind him as he runs back in, only to get run over! GACHI- NO, ZSJ sunsets Cobb first! But Cobb rolls through!

Cobb rolls into the jackknife, TWO as ZSJ bridges up!! ZSJ spins Cobb around, but Cobb fights the backslide! Cobb turns things around to backslide ZSJ, but ZSJ rolls through to trap Cobb’s head! NECK TWIST! PENALTY KICK! The fans fire up again while ZSJ catches his breath. ZSJ still clutches his side, but he watches Cobb rise. The fans rally, ZSJ storms up on Cobb and waistlocks, but Cobb breaks free! Cobb wrenches, snapmares, and steals EURO CLUTCH! TWO!! ZSJ storms up on Cobb, fires forearms, but Cobb ROCKS him with just one! ZSJ walks it off, comes back with more, then a BOOT! Cobb swings, into a BOOT!

Cobb rebounds, but ZSJ BOOTS! ZSJ runs, but into a BOOT from Cobb! ZSJ drops to his knees, but Cobb drags him back up to suplex! ZSJ fights that to wrench and PELE the arm! ZSJ waistlocks to GERMAN SUPLEX!! The fans are thunderous, but then Cobb is right back up! Cobb deadlift GERMAN SUPLEXES ZSJ away! The fans rally as ZSJ ends up in a corner. Cobb rises, runs up, and UPPERCUTS! Cobb then brings ZSJ up for a SPIN OUT BOMB! Cover, TWO! GACHIMUCHI MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO!! ZSJ survives heavy impact after heavy impact, but Cobb powers up his arm. Cobb runs, but ZSJ LARIATS with him!

Both men stay up but ZSJ does stagger. ZSJ and Cobb DOUBLE LARIAT again! We hit ten minutes, time is still on ZSJ’s side! But then Cobb LARIATS him down! Cobb runs, but ZSJ KICKS the lariat away! Scoop and ZACK DRIVER!! Cover, TWO!! Cobb survives and the fans are thunderous again! ZSJ runs to KICK! That might’ve hurt ZSJ’s leg more than anything. ZSJ runs but Cobb blocks this kick! ZSJ SLAPS Cobb, so Cobb DROPKICKS ZSJ! Cobb then hauls ZSJ up to suplex, and he puts ZSJ up top! Cobb goes up top with him, then SUPER- NO, ZSJ slips around to a SLEEPER! The ref counts the ropebreak, ZSJ drops back at 4.

ZSJ considers his options, and gets under Cobb, for a POWERBOMB! Roll to a cover, TWO! The fans fire up as Cobb stays in this! But we’re at the three minute warning! ZSJ KICKS and KICKS and KICKS, then runs, but Cobb ducks the Penalty Kick to schoolboy! TWO!! ZSJ escapes, Cobb runs back up, and Cobb blocks a boto! Waistlock, O’Conner Roll, but ZSJ pops that into a SLEEPER! Cobb rolls back to get free, and deadlifts ZSJ into a pop-up! F 5000!! Cobb hurries to haul ZSJ back up, whip and TOUR OF THE- CRUCIFIX TAKEDOWN! ONE!! Cobb gets free fast, and he hurries to haul ZSJ back up! LARIAT! FALLING HAMMER!

Cobb swings again but into an omoplata! ZSJ wants the other arm, but Cobb moves around as we hit the two minute warning! ZSJ just shifts to get the other arm in the omoplata, then a traditional ARMBAR! Cobb holds hands, ZSJ breaks the grip! Cobb powers right through to deadlift ZSJ! Then a TOUR OF THE ISLANDS!!! Cover, COBB WINS!!

Winner: Jeff Cobb, by pinfall (NEW NJPW World TV Champion)

With 90 SECONDS to spare, Cobb ends ZSJ’s reign! The Imperial Unit wears gold once again, will “season five” be the biggest and strongest yet?

Yota Tsuji VS David Finlay w/ Gedo!

Los Ingobernables de Japon and the Bullet Club War Dogs have been battling all up and down the Road to Wrestling Dontaku, but now Gene Blast will have it out with The Rebel! Who proves they are truly ungovernable?

The bell rings and the fans rally for Yota already. Yota and Finlay stare down, but then back away as Finlay gets annoyed by the fans. Yota encourages the fans and they get louder for him. Finlay gets on a corner to throw up the Too Sweet, the fans boo him. Finlay hops down with a frown, and the two circle. Yota blocks a kick, headlocks, but Finlay powers up, only for Yota to hold on tight. Finlay rolls to a cover, ONE and Yota holds onto the headlock. Finlay powers up again, powers out this time, but Yota runs him over! The fans cheer, Yota grins, but Finlay bails out. The fans boo while Finlay paces. Yota gets on the corner and the fans fire up!

Finlay slides in, Yota hits him with a body shot first! Finlay goes to a corner, Yota RAMS into him, and RAMS him, and RAMS him again. Yota then brings Finlay around to whip corner to corner. Yota runs up but Finlay puts him on the apron! Finlay knocks Yota off the apron, then goes out to RAM him into railing, right in front of commentary! Finlay RAMS Yota in again and again, but the ref reprimands him. Finlay lets off, leaves Yota behind, and says it’s too easy. Yota writhes, the ring count starts, and Finlay waits. Yota rises up at 6 of 20, stands at 8, and makes his way in at 10. But Finlay is there to stomp away on him at the ropes!

Finlay drops a KNEE into Yota’s back, pulls Yota’s hair and a leg, but the ref reprimands. Yota has the ROPEBREAK, the ref counts, and Finlay lets go at 4. Finlay brings Yota up to suplex and BROKEN ARROW! Finlay flexes and fans do cheer the feat of strength. Finlay covers, TWO! Finlay mockingly says Yota is tough, HEADBUTTS away on Yota’s ribs! Then he drops a leg! Yota sputters but Finlay mocks the fans rallying behind him. Finlay whips Yota hard into a corner, and Yota falls forward. Finlay covers, TWO! The fans cheer but Finlay stands on Yota’s fingers! Finlay stomps Yota’s arm, then clamps on a chinlock.

Yota endures as Finlay leans on the hold. The fans rally up again, even as Finlay thrashes Yota around. Yota fights around, reaches out, but Finlay grinds him back down to the mat! The fans rally harder as Yota reaches out. Finlay sits Yota up so he can CLUB away on Yota’s face, then puts the hold on tighter! It’s almost a Bulldog Choke, but Yota fights to his feet! Yota reaches out but Finlay wrangles Yota back down! Yota is fading! The ref checks, and the hand drops once! The hand drops twice! But Yota opens his eyes and rises up! The fans rally and Yota stands to throw body shots! Yota is free, and he runs, but into an ELBOW! Finlay adds a SENTON!

Yota flounders away to a corner, and Finlay barks at him. Finlay aims from a corner as Yota rises, and fans rally with the barking. Finlay runs in, to UPPERCUT! And clothesline! And then Finlay brings Yota out, only for Yota to suplex Finlay into the corner! The fans fire up while both men are down! Finlay rolls away while clutching the back of his head, and Yota rises while catching his breath. The fans rally again and Yota stands. Yota fires up and runs in at the corner, to STINGER SPLASH! Yota keeps moving, to FLIPPING RANA! Finlay tumbles out, and the fans fire up as Yota builds speed! Yota DIVES and sends Finlay over railing!

The fans fire up with Yota while Finlay is down in No Man’s Land! Yota catches his breath again and the ring count starts. Finlay crawls through the gap, but we’re at 10 of 20 before Yota stands. Yota storms over and drags Finlay up at 15, then puts him in the ring. The fans cheer and Yota gets Finlay up. Yota half nelsons for a GUTBUSTER! Yota then snapmares Finlay into a body scissors squeeze! Finlay endures, moves around, but Yota grabs an arm in a cording hold! Finlay flails with his free arm but he’s still far from ropes! Finlay pulls at the body scissors but Yota just squeezes tighter! Finlay endures, fights around, and has the ROPEBREAK!

The ref counts, Yota lets off, and the fans applaud. Finlay coughs as he goes to a corner, and Yota paces. Yota storms over, brings Finlay back up, but Finlay blocks the suplex. Finlay throws body shots but Yota gives a hard body shot in return! Finlay falls over and coughs his way to ropes. The ref has Yota stay back while he checks on Finlay. But then Yota runs up to KICK Finlay into the corner! Yota stands Finlay up to CHOP! Finlay grits his teeth as his chest stings, but Yota brings him up to the top rope! Yota ROCKS Finlay, then roars, and the fans fire up! Yota climbs, brings Finlay up, but Finliay shoves him down!

Finlay adjusts, but Yota comes back to GAMANGIRI! Yota goes back up, brings Finlay to the top, but Finlay throws body shots! Finlay SUNSET FLIPS, but Yota holds on! Finlay pries Yota from the corner, but Yota sunset flips him back! TWO, but Yota kicks and whips! Finlay reverses, and scoops for BLUE THUNDER! Both men are down and Gedo cheers Finlay while the fans rally for Yota. Finlay hauls Yota up for the Canadian Rack, CANADIAN HAMMER! Cover, TWO! Yota stays in this and the fans are still behind him, but Finlay keeps his cool. Finlay drags Yota around, reels him in, but Yota fights the lift! Yota back drops Finlay away!

The fans cheer as Yota clinches, but Finlay fights free! Finlay gets Yota back in, picks him up, but Yota slips free of the bomb! Finlay dodges the knee, but runs into a tilt-o-whirl BACKBREAKER! Finlay writhes but Yota drags him back up. Yota suplexes for the ORANGE CRUSH! Cover, TWO! Finlay survives the brainbuster bomb and we pass 15 minutes, but Yota keeps his cool. Yota grins, even! Yota stands, brings Finlay to a corner, then goes up and up for the FLYING- PRIMA NOCTA! Finlay reels Yota in to bring him up and BUCKLE BOMB! Then suplex INTO OBLIVION! Cover, TWO!! Yota survives and Finlay is beside himself!

The fans rally while Yota is down, but Finlay brings his kneepad down. Finlay stands, drags Yota up, but Yota is deadweight. The ref checks but Yota seems okay to continue, so Finlay drags him up! Yota fights the suplex so Finlay knees him low! Finlay brings Yota back up and in, slashes his throat, and suplexes, but Yota cradle counters! TWO!! Finlay runs up, into a clinch! BACKBREAKER! FLATLINER! STOMP!! The fans fire up as Yota stands tall, but then he drops back down, needing to catch his breath. The fans rally up and both men stir. Finlay rises first, and he sits Yota up. Finlay UPPERCUTS, and Gedo says nice!

Yota sits back up, Finlay UPPERCUTS him again! Yota shakes his head as he sits back up, so Finlay UPPERCUTS again! Finlay taunts Yota, Yota stands, and Finlay UPPERCUTS! Yota shakes his head and comes back, but Finlay UPPERCUTS again! Finlay eggs Yota on, and Yota snarls as he storms back up. Finlay UPPERCUTS again and Yota drops back! Finlay says this is too easy, but Yota still smiles?! Yota rises, and he fires forearm after forearm on Finlay! Finlay UPPERCUTS, UPPERCUTS and UPPERCUTS! Yota drops to a knee, Finlay says BANG! UPPER- BACKSLIDE! Roll through, Finlay blocks a knee to UPPERCUT!

Yota SUPERKICKS! Finlay UPERCUTS! Yota FOREARMS, then he dodges the lariat to JUMP KNEE! Cover, TWO!! We hit 20 minutes as Yota hauls Finlay up to a fireman’s carry, and swings into the POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO!! Finlay survives but Yota storms around. Yota waits on Finlay to rise, then runs in, to CURB STOMP! Yota roars, because he’s not done yet! Up and up, MARVEL CRUSH!! Cover off the flying stomp, TWO!! Finlay survives, but Yota just fires up again! The fans are with Yota as he aims from the corner! Finlay rises, but then Gedo gets on the apron! Yota runs Gedo off, but Finlay SPEARS first!!

Finlay hurries to get Yota up and suplex! STUN DOG MILLIONAIRE!? Yota takes a play out of Will Ospreay’s book (or Orange Cassidy’s, or Mark Andrews’), then runs in to GENE BLASTER!! But Yota says that’s not enough! The fans fire up again as Yota reloads in the corner! Finlay slowly rises, but Gedo distracts the ref! Yota runs in, into a SHILLELAGH SHOT!! Finlay drags Yota up and reels him in, for a POWERBOMB!! High stack, TWO?!?! Yota survives and shocks Finlay! Finlay is furious, he gets Yota up for another POWERBOMB!! Then a flip-over, suplex, for OVERKILL!! Cover, Finlay wins!

Winner: David Finlay, by pinfall

The Goatslayer may have won, but he still needed the ace up his sleeve to steal this one from Yota! Will Finlay stop at nothing to make himself the savior of this company? Or is he simply a false prophet?

IWGP Global Heavyweight Championship: Nic Nemeth VS Hiroshi Tanahashi!

The Wanted Man has wanted to show off ever since arriving in NJPW, and he started off strong taking this title off David Finlay. But now he gets what he wanted even more, and that’s a dream match with The Ace of the Universe! Will Nemeth take President Tanahashi to the Danger Zone? Or will we soon witness the birth of a Two Belt Ace?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see who shows the world their true strength!

Tanahashi shows off the abs and the fans cheer. The bell rings and the fans rally up for Tanahashi. Tanahashi and Nemeth circle, tie up, and they’re in a deadlock. They break, reset, and circle again. They tie up, are in another deadlock, but Tanahashi gets around to waistlock. Nemeth reaches back, shoots around to get a leg then a waistlock, then shifts, but Tanahashi fights off the cobra twist. Tanahashi wrenches an arm to a wristlock, but Nemeth rolls, slips around again, and tries from the other side. Tanahashi fights the cobra twist to roll Nemeth up, TWO! The fans cheer the exchange and even Nemeth nods as they reset.

Nemeth and Tanahashi circle, Nemeth gets a leg, and he brings Tanahashi down to a cradle, TWO! Tanahashi fights through the leg guard to get a headlock, but Nemeth fights around to roll Tanahashi. ONE, Nemeth facelocks, and he brings Tanahashii up. Tanahashi puts Nemeth on ropes, Red Shoes counts, and Tanahashi lets off slowly. Tanahashi says clean break, but then Nemeth runs up! Tanahashi arm-drags, arm-drags again, and has the cording hold! The fans cheer while Nemeth moves around. Nemeth stands, hooks Tanahashi’s leg with a leg, and then flips Tanahashi over to a cradle! TWO, and the two stand off again.

The fans applaud as both men reset. They feel out a knuckle lock, but Nemeth again goes for a leg. Nemeth waistlocks, and he still wants that cobra twist. Tanahashi drops but Nemeth tries for a ground cobra! Tanahashi clasps hands to resist that, then he rolls things to a headlock. Nemeth keeps his shoulders up, fights to his feet, and he hooks a leg to roll Tanahashi! Tanahashi manages to keep a shoulder up, so Nemeth flips around and has the roll from the other side! TWO, and Nemeth DROPKICKS Tanahashi down! The fans fire up as Nemeth swivels the hips! Tanahashi backs away to ropes to catch his breath.

Nemeth waits on Tanahashi, Tanahashi stands and they circle. They tie up, Nemeth headlocks but Tanahashi waistlocks. Nemeth switches, Tanahashi fights the lift, and then Tanahashi switches. Nemeth reaches around, switches again, but Tanahashi switches on him. Nemeth switches, and goes to throw Tanahashi out! Tanahashi fights that with elbows, then gets a leg, to DRAGON SCREW! Nemeth flounders out of the ring while the fans cheer! Tanahashi goes out after Nemeth, puts him in the ring, and the fans cheer. Tanahashi drags Nemeth up, bumps him off buckles, then fires up as he whips corner to corner.

Nemeth reverses the whip, runs in, but into an elbow! Tanahashi goes up to CROSSBODY! Fans fire up for the air guitar! Nemeth stands, Tanahashi runs up and dropkicks the legs out! Nemeth flounders, stands back up, and Tanahashi runs in, but into a dropkick right back! The fans rally while both men are down, but Nemeth grins as he evens the score. Nemeth stands, storms up on Tanahashi and grabs the leg. Nemeth stands on Tanahashi’s face, then DDTs the leg! Tanahashi clutches the knee, but Nemeth drags him around. Nemeth steps over, has a standing toehold, but Tanahashi kicks at him with his free leg!

Nemeth and Tanahashi struggle against each other, and Nemeth powers things into a cover! TWO, and Nemeth YANKS the leg! Then Nemeth cradles Tanahashi, TWO! Tanahashi is still in this and the fans rally behind him, even as Nemeth stalks Tanahashi. Tanahashi fires forearms! But Nemeth kicks the leg out! Nemeth gets the leg to YANK it, then he drops a JUMP ELBOW! Cover, TWO! Tanahashi is tougher than that but Nemeth grabs the bad leg. Nemeth stretches the leg out, and adds a chinbar so he can bend Tanahashi around. Nemeth hooks the leg, pulls on it, it’s like a standing kneebar! Tanahashi endures and the fans rally up!

Tanahashi endures, even as Nemeth makes it an ANKLE LOCK! Tanahashi slips under and brings Nemeth down with his own leglock, only for Nemeth to turn him back over! Tanahashi reaches out to the ROPEBREAK! Nemeth stomps the leg as he lets off. Nemeth eggs Tanahashi on, so Tanahashi stands up and fires a forearm! Nemeth fires a haymaker! Tanahashi forearms again, Nemeth throws a forearm back! Tanahashi throws another forearm, so Nemeth kicks the leg out! Tanahashi eggs Nemeth on now, then blocks his superkick! But not the SATELLITE DDT! Cover, TWO!! Tanahashi is still in this and the fans fire up!

Nemeth stands and shows he still has energy to spare. Tanahashi stands, Nemeth taunts him, “I thought you were a legend!” Nemeth whips, and Tanahashi CLOBBERS him! The fans fire up again and Tanahashi fires up with them! Nemeth stands into a strike fest! Tanahashi scoops to SLAM Nemeth into the drop zone! Then Tanahashi goes up for the SUNSET SENTON! Cover, TWO! Nemeth is tougher than that but the fans rally with Tanahashi. Nemeth slowly rises and Tanahashi runs, SLING- NO, Nemeth sends Tanahashi out! But Tanahashi skins the cat! Then he TOSSES Nemeth! But now Nemeth skins the cat!

The fans fire up, Nemeth mocks the air guitar, but then Tanahashi dodges! Nemeth dodges, and DOUBLE CROSSBODIES collide! The fans fire up while both men are down! Both men stir, the fans rally up, and Nemeth fires a haymaker! Tanahashi gives a forearm back! Nemeth fires another haymaker, Tanahashi fires another forearm! They stand, continue to trade shots, and then Tanahashi gets the edge! But Nemeth roars to HEADBUT! Both men wobble, Nemeth roars again, and he whips, only for Tanahashi to reverse and SLINGBLADE! The fans fire up and Tanahashi roars! Tanahashi goes up a corner, Nemeth stands, into HIGH FLY ATTACK! Cover, TWO!

The fans fire up again as Tanahashi resets! Tanahashi climbs again while Nemeth is down, HIGH FLY FLOP!! Nemeth avoids disaster and Tanahashi writhes from his crash landing! But Tanahashi just fires himself back up! After all, as NEVER Openweight Six Man Champion, he can’t give up! Tanahashi runs in, but into SUPERKICK 101!! Cover, TWO!! Tanahashi survives and we pass 15 minutes! Nemeth rises first, he takes aim again, and Tanahashi turns around into a kick! Nemeth runs, to FAMOUS- NO, Tanahashi stops the Famouser to SHOTEI! But Nemeth roars, swings, only for Tanahashi to TWIST ‘N’ SHOUT!

The fans are thunderous and Tanahashi gets running, to SLINGBLADE! Cover, TWO! Tanahashi drags Nemeth into the drop zone, but has him on his stomach! Tanahashi goes up to HIGH FLY FLOW, onto knees!! Nemeth turns over in time, and then covers, TWO!!! Tanahashi survives the crushing counter, and the fans rally as hard as they can for him! Tanahashi stands, DANGER- NO, Tanahashi shakes that off, then runs, but Nemeth dodges! DANGER ZONE!! But Tanahashi rises up and Nemeth reloads, to DANGER ZONE again!! Cover, Nemeth wins!!

Winner: Nic Nemeth, by pinfall (still IWGP Global Heavyweight Champion)

Nemeth got what he wanted in this dream match, and then he came out as the Top Gun! Will Tanahashi have to settle for being a Six Man Tag Team Champion for now?

As for Nemeth, he is given the belt, and he holds it up high. But he also shows Tanahashi respect with a hug, and Tanahashi shows it back by lifting Nemeth’s hand. Then the streamers fly! That took Tanahashi by surprise! But then FINLAY attacks Nemeth!! The Rebel also CLOBBERS Tanahashi! The fans boo as this War Dog is off the leash! Finlay rains down fists on Nemeth again, then he TOSSES Tanahashi out. Finlay gets the shillelagh from Gedo and he takes aim! Finlay takes a swing, but Nemeth dodges! Nemeth fires fists in return and the fans fire up! Gedo watches out as these two go all over the place, in all of the streamers!

Young Lions hurry in to stop this, but Gedo calls reinforcements! Here come Connors & Drilla! They get the pack leader outta there, clearly Nemeth isn’t going down easy! Nemeth gets the mic to tell Finlay he’s a coward! Nemeth was just in this ring with a legend, and he’ll do it every damn night! Finlay clearly takes the easy way out, because he’s a POS who attacks from behind! If Finlay had any balls, he’ll fight Nemeth fair and square. Nemeth will defend anytime, anywhere, because that’s how damn good he is! Hell, tomorrow night! Wrestling Dontaku Night 2, rematch for the Global title! Let’s do it!!

The fans like the sound of that! Finlay may have taken a cheap shot, but he’s still getting what he wants. Will the Rebel shoot down The Wanted Man and take back the IWGP Global Heavyweight Championship? Or will Nemeth bring Finlay into the Danger Zone?

My Thoughts:

A great start to what I think is the first two-night Wrestling Dontaku ever. I will say, of the matches I skipped, The House of Torture winning over Moxley’s team is classic go-home math showing that Moxley will win out against Narita tomorrow on night two. That way, Moxley then faces Shota Umino next Saturday, May 11th, at Resurgence. Anyway, great NJPW World TV Championship match, and a great rematch from ZSJ and Cobb on top of it. Great win for Cobb, and that was the logical move after having lost to ZSJ the last two times. Also, feels like that’s why ZSJ beat Riddle after Riddle had a rather short run. If Cobb was to win this belt, they didn’t wanna make the Chosen Bros face each other, as great as that would’ve been.

Really good grudge match from Yota and Finlay, but I should’ve known Finlay would need to cheat to win. And as we saw at the end, Finlay wants the Global Championship back, what with losing out on the World Championship when he lost in the New Japan Cup. Great match from Nemeth and Tanahashi, great win for Nemeth, and doing back to back nights is some good stuff out of Nemeth and Finlay. I don’t know if they’ll steal the show, but they’ll definitely put on a real good match to help top off Dontaku.

My Score: 8.8/10

Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!

Coverage

Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 5.2.2024

Under Siege is tomorrow! Yeah the card looks pretty awful, but maybe this Go Home will spice things up!

Published

21 hours ago

May 2, 2024

Andrew Balaz

Not gonna mislead anyone here, Under Siege looks nearly as bad as a Steven Segal film by the same name. Lots of useless tag matches, only really the X Division title to care about. It reminds me of a “Road to” show that New Japan does. Bunch of worthless matches with a few story wrinkles but entirely skippable.

Hopefully something crazy happens or the show is good enough to cover the bad card. But let’s hope something happens tonight to maybe create some reason to watch.

.@TheSamiCallihan debuts the first episode of #DMTV! #TNAiMPACT pic.twitter.com/OWrTeBtRZ6

— TNA Wrestling (@ThisIsTNA) May 3, 2024

Ratings:

Mustafa Ali vs Chris Bey w/Ace Austin: Ali wins via 450 – **
Dani Luna w/Jody Threat vs Alisha Edwards w/Masha Slamovich: Lish wins via Russian Death Device – ** 1/4
Hammerstone vs Cody Deaner: Hammerstone wins via Torture Rack – *
#1 Contender Match: Ace Austin w/Chris Bey vs Trey Miguel w/Zachary Wentz: Ace wins via The Fold – ***
TNA Knockouts Championship: Jordynne Grace (c) vs Miyu Yamashita: Grace retains via Juggernaut Driver – *** 1/2

Results:

Mustafa Ali vs Chris Bey w/Ace Austin

Ali with a simple Headlock takeover, Bey fights back up and tries to create something with a rope run; but Ali gets the best of things with a Back Elbow. Ali gets cocky as Bey retreats to the corner, Bey turns things around quickly, lands the 10 Count Punches in the corner, Ali tries to fight back but Bey snaps off a quick DDT for a near fall. As Bey goes to continue the offense, Ali Drop Toe Holds Bey into the ropes neck first. Ali again, demonstrating some of the worst in-ring trash talk, Bey turns things around since Ali is running his mouth too much. Ali gets set in the Tree of Woe, Bey goes across to another corner and does a Coast to Coast Elbow Drop as Ali tries to sit up. Honestly, stupid looking since its obviously too coordinated. No one would stay half sat up just to eat an elbow.

While the move looked cool, I now care significantly less about what’s going on. Illogical spots just because “they’re cool”, should not be rewarded. Bey controls the match after the stupid spot, hits his Corner Uppercut Hip Attack, Ali tries to duck a few moves and create something but eats a Spinebuster for 2. Art of Finesse attempt, but Ali shoves him to the outside. Working back inside Ali goes for his Rolling Neckbreaker but Bey connects with a Roundhouse Kick to stop Ali in his tracks. Fighting Spirit spot, they run into the ropes, Ali has a bad Double Leg takedown that he tries to turn into a Cradle with feet on the ropes, but Ace pushes the feet off.

As security starts to move on Ace, Ali hits a Suicida, then Bey connects on a Tope con Hilo. Bey starts rocking Ali, hits the Kudome Valentine but Ali manages to pull himself under the bottom rope just enough to avoid losing. Bey climbs the corner, Ali German Suplexes Bey to the apron, Ali goes for the 450, misses, Bey goes to finish the match but the security get involved again, hit Bey with the flag and then Ali lands the 450 for the win.

I liked when the Security Guards were window dressing instead of mooks to cheat with. This just makes the matches dumber and significantly less interesting, especially when its nameless mooks and its not even a talent getting heat.

Dani Luna w/Jody Threat vs Alisha Edwards w/Masha Slamovich

Dani starts strong and fast, forearm shots, lariats and a quick near fall sends Alisha retreating to the ropes to get some advice from Masha. Dani goes to attack Lish, Lish with a Drop Toe Hold, Masha takes advantage of the distracted ref and Lish hits a Satellite DDT and then taunts entirely too much. As Lish talks too much, Dani stands up and starts beating the hell out of Lish, Suplex into the rope assisted Blue Thunder Bomb. Dani goes for the Luna Landing, but Masha climbs on the apron, distraction happens, then Lish goes after Jody and the ref stays distracted with Lish. Masha slides into the ring, Roundhouse Kick into the Russian Death Device and Lish turns around for the win!

Sami’s little segment is aptly named DMTv since it feels like a weird hallucination or trip with the way he does stuff.

Hammerstone vs Cody Deaner

Am I supposed to care about this? Hammerstone looks like he’s chiseled out of granite and Deaner looks like he’s fished out of a trailer park. Hammerstone says a lot of how I feel that the Deaner schtick is pathetic. Deaner says he’s given the power to add a stipulation, Hammer says Arm Wrestling Match, Deaner wants a Sin City Street Fight. So we know what the crowd will pick. Christ this is so carny even Court Bauer blushed.

Deaner bonks Hammer with the mic, low dropkick, goes to grab a trash can lid and hits Hammer…but it just pisses off Captain Hammer. Stomps a mudhole in him, Irish Whip into a Back Elbow and Hammer deposits him to the outside to utilize the gimmick I would assume. This is going on much longer than it should, Deaner finds a chair, clocks Hammer once, goes for Twice, but this isn’t Kpop; so Hammer says no and hits him with a Backbreaker. Then Hammer hits him with a chairshot, 10 Count Punches in the corner, Sack of Shit, Deaner goes for the Ricky Morton lean against the ropes and sell to the crowd spot, but Hammer leans into him and starts using the chair again.

Deaner does his nerd Hulk Up, tries to call for a Body Slam but Hammer doesn’t move and drops the dweeb down. Deaner is back to the begging the crowd Ricky Morton spot…but the crowd doesn’t care since Deaner is a jabroni. Hammer tosses Deaner like a pizza ribs first into the back of the chair and just takes a few moments to revel in his handwork. Deaner fights back, lands a few right hands, tries to call for the Body Slam again like an idiot, gets Hammer half way and falls over so Hammer just rains down punches (can we end this waste of time please). Hellavator, I mean Nightmare Pendulum but Deaner floats over and lands the Scoop Slam onto the steel chair for only 2.

The crowd starts chanting for table, so of course Deaner obliges…this is going on so damn long. Hammer no sells the forearm, Vertical Suplex, goozle, and then Hammer Chokeslams Deaner through the table and calls to for the Torture Rack. Deaner is Rack’d and dead. ‘Bout damn time.

Like a Torpedo, Something is there…

Trent The Seventh and Ball Of Speed, alongside Broken Matt Hardy, are geared up to render The System obsolete tomorrow night at #TNAUnderSiege! pic.twitter.com/laEOlXayIc

— TNA Wrestling (@ThisIsTNA) May 3, 2024

I’m mad at myself that I popped for Ball of Speed. I’m not even sure why, but I like it.

"Can you please get fired?"

.@joehendry's live apology transformed into a new hit about @AJFrancis410! The "apology" song took things HIGHER than ever! #TNAiMPACT pic.twitter.com/6P7pDFbK3p

— TNA Wrestling (@ThisIsTNA) May 3, 2024

If I’ve said it once I’ve said it at least 3 dozen times, Joe Hendry is a treasure. Starting with a medley of the insult songs to lead into the Creed parody is genius. Odd apology, but I respect it. “Can you please get fired…”, such a great song.

#1 Contender Match: Ace Austin w/Chris Bey vs Trey Miguel w/Zachary Wentz

Typical Junior style start with counters and some chain wrestling and then a quick tension spot where Trey slaps Ace and then they fire off on each other for a few seconds before they get broken up because its just a shmoz. Trey baits Ace to the outside, Up and Over but Ace lands on the apron and then Wentz picks the ankle as Trey feigns injury to distract the referee. Back Rake back into the ring and just insulting Knife Edge Chops at a deliberate pace. Commercial break happens and Trey is still in charge. Ace shoots the Double and turns it into a Jacknife Cradle for 2 but Ace is still visibly hobbled.

Trey tries to keep Ace grounded but he tries to fire up and Trey finds different ways to keep Ace grounded including a Running Bodyscissors into Full Mount. Kick combination rush from Trey as he goes for the Asai Moonsault to punctuate it but Ace gets the knees up. Short range Knee Strike, Click Click Boom, Corner Splash Seated Lariat spot into a Triangle Kick for 2! Ace looks to set up The Fold, Wentz distracts, Trey grabs tights! But Ace kicks out! Trey with the Backflip Back of the Head Dropkick. Bey levels Wentz and Trey is talking shit to the fans, Ace goes for the Crucifix Pin, but kicks out at 2.

Jackie Bryant Headlock Kick from Trey, but Ace blocks it. Triangle Kick misses, Ace tries to jump on him but misses, Cheeky Nandos, then Trey heads up but Ace cuts him off. They struggle on the top rope, Trey Bell Claps Ace, Ace tries to duck but Trey turns it into the Sunset Flip, locomotion float away, Ace Face Stomp into The Fold! Ace wins!

.@TheEricYoung and @Walking_Weapon make their intentions clear: they're walking into #TNAUnderSiege ready to take down @SteveMaclin and @FrankieKazarian! #TNAiMPACT pic.twitter.com/idI78rvsYJ

— TNA Wrestling (@ThisIsTNA) May 3, 2024

The Bald Bearded Canadians, good ole team BBC…wait…

TNA Knockouts Championship: Jordynne Grace (c) vs Miyu Yamashita

They start off respectfully, which is what you expect since Miyu is well respected in this generation. A few Headlock Takeovers, Shoulder Blocks and finally Miyu drops Jordynne with a Switchblade Kick. Miyu goes to follow up, but Jordynne catches the kick and T-Bone Suplex gives Jordynne a near fall. Juggernaut Driver early, but Miyu counters, rams Jordynne into the corner, Triangle Kick from Miyu for 2! Cravat into Knee Strikes and then a PK to the spine keeps Miyu in control. Miyu lets Jordynne up and they trade strikes a bit, Jordynne’s arms prove to be a little stronger than Miyu’s legs, takes out the legs and then the Jackhammer on the floor from Jordynne!

Jordynne tries to roll Miyu back in, but Miyu continues to roll out to buy some space, Jordynne goes for a dive and eats a foot. Miyu looks for an Apron Death Valley Driver, Jordynne fights it a while but Miyu eventually gets her over and down on the apron for 2. Miyu with a Headlock Takeover, but both ties the other one up and the ropes save the awkward but effective exchange. Strike exchange number 2. Miyu no sells a few Scoop Slams and lands Round Kicks. Spinning Backfist and Round Kick connect simultaneously for both women to drop.

Jordynne charges, Pink Striker tries to block with the front kick, but Jordynne plows through with a Back Elbow. Kinniku Buster attempt but Miyu knows how to get away from that and fights off with Knee Strikes, Jordynne is rocked but fights back up and Avalanche Back Body Drop for 2! Jordynne no sells a Roundhouse Kick, Miyu no sells a Lariat then another kick from Miyu and a Back Kick to the face for 2. Skull Kick attempt, blocked, Juggernaut Driver out of nowhere to retain!

Overall Score: 6.25/10

The second half of the show was pretty damn good, but God was the first half useless. Hammerstone and Deaner went on far too long, that was dumb, it looked dumb, I felt dumb watching it. Ali’s match was garbage with the stupid spot monkey indie garbage spot. If I want to watch wrestling that makes less sense than Chinese Dramas with Hindi subtitles, I’ll watch AEW and have a stroke.

Thankfully, Joe Hendry got a good chunk of time, the Trey and Ace match was pretty good and overlooking the stupid run in after match stuff, the Knockouts match itself was pretty damn good. So the new bookers have really consistently done this stuff, where there’s a ton of overbooked stupidity, but they sprinkle in enough okay stuff to make me not completely lose faith. OH – and we do get Kushida versus Gresham tomorrow, so at least that strengthens the lackluster card.

Lets see if they ever figure out how to really book, or if they eventually go full TNA 2015.

Let us know what you think on social media @ChairshotMedia and always remember to use the hashtag #UseYourHead!