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Mitchell’s NJPW New Beginnings Sapporo Part One! (2/1/20)

Strong Style at its finest in Goto VS Shingo!

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NJPW New Beginning Sapporo 2020

NJPW begins again in Sapporo!

And with a truly hard hitting contest in the main event! Can Hirooki Goto hold onto the NEVER Openweight title?

 

NOTE: NJPW no longer wants to feed AXS TV now that it is with Anthem and Impact Wrestling. But never fear, I will cover NJPW in the spirit of AXS in providing the most important matches of the show.

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Jon Moxley & Kazuchika Okada VS Minoru Suzuki & Taichi; Suzuki & Taichi win.
  • NEVER Openweight Championship: Hirooki Goto VS Shingo Takagi; Takagi wins and becomes the new NEVER Openweight Champion.

PLAY BY PLAY

Jon Moxley & Kazuchika Okada VS Minoru Suzuki & Taichi!

Suzuki-Gun is targeting some big game, and that forces the unlikeliest of team-ups! The Maniac and the Rainmaker fight against the meanest and the sliest, can they make it out of this in one piece?

For those unfamiliar with AEW, Moxley has that eye patch because Chris Jericho jammed a spike into that eye! But Moxley can still see clearly enough to fight, so will he get to see his hand raised alongside the former Heavyweight Champion?

Speaking of, Moxley and Okada stand side-by-side outside the ring and throw off their jackets. And then together, they rush the ring! Moxley brawls with Suzuki while Okada is after Taichi! The referee rings the bell so that this is on the record, and does his best to restore order. Taichi rakes Okada’s eyes and throws him out. Moxley and Suzuki throw more forearms and even SLAPS as Taichi sends Okada into railing. Suzuki knees low, throws more forearms, then eggs Moxley on. But Moxley puts his hands down to egg Suzuki on. Suzuki accepts and ROCKS Moxley. Moxley throws forearms back and Suzuki dares him to keep going. Moxley throws forearms from all sides, then headbutts! Suzuki staggers but then laughs!

Suzuki throws a forearm, Moxley returns it, and they’re brawling again. Back and forth, back and forth, neither man backing down. Suzuki headbutts, Moxley gives one back! Moxley then sits down and turns around to mock Suzuki. “You think I’m scared of you, mother f*cker?!” Suzuki boots, Moxley boots, and back again! Moxley spins to forearm but Suzuki keeps hitting back. Suzuki forearms, Moxley CHOPS, Suzuki rocks Moxley with big shots! Moxley staggers about but stays standing. He winds up and Suzuki waits, only for Moxley to SLAP him. And then give double dirty birds. Fans cheer the guts from Moxley, but Suzuki takes on finger to bend it! The ref counts but Suzuki brings Moxley to ropes. The ref reprimands Suzuki and counts but Suzuki lets go at 4.

Suzuki rocks Moxley and SLAPS him back! Then knees him down! Tag to Taichi and he toys with Moxley. Taichi clubs Moxley but Moxley powers him to the corner! Moxley rolls back to ram in a shoulder, then tag to Okada. Moxley makes sure to hit Suzuki first before helping Okada double whip. They double elbow Taichi down, then drop and elboe and a basement dropkick! Quick teamwork already, and Okada drags Taichi up. Suzuki’s temper can be heard as he kicks railing while Okada drops Taichi with a neckbreaker. Cover, TWO, but Okada keeps his cool. Okada clamps on with a chinlock and Taichi endures. Fans cheer as Taichi works against the hold. Suzuki has found chairs from somewhere and has them on stand-by. Taichi gets a ropebreak with a leg and Okada lets up.

Suzuki and Moxley bark at each other on the outside but the ref gets them to return to their corners. Okada returns to Taichi with a scoop and slam, then a slingshot. Taichi avoids the senton and boots him, but Okada fires forearms. Taichi kicks but Okada forearms, and repeat. Now these two get to go back and forth, but Taichi pie faces Okada. Okada just shrugs off the kicks and gives forearms back. They keep going back and forth but Okada gets an edge to uppercut. But Taichi snap back suplexes! Suzuki throws chairs at Moxley! And then whips MOxley into railing! And JAMS the chair in! And SMACKS Moxley on the back! The ref can’t do anything about those two as Taichi throws Okada out. Suzuki brings Moxley into the crowd and gives him a seat. Suzuki throws forearms on Moxley while Taichi whips Okada into railings! Taichi copies Suzuki as he rips railing down.

Fans get clear as Taichi brings Okada over to bowl into chairs! Suzuki keeps kicking Moxley and then uses railing as a weapon! Suzuki buries Moxley with the railing and chairs! Taichi uses a chair on Okada and then stalks up behind him. Young Lions keep close to each of these brawls as the 20 count begins. The count reaches 10 but Suzuki has brought Moxley to back production. Taichi brings Okada back to the ring at 16 so that the match can continue. You can hear the brawling of Suzuki and Moxley by production, and Moxley rakes eyes! Taichi clamps onto Okada with a mounted neck wrench but Okada endures. Taichi cranks hard and grinds Okada inot the mat. Back to Moxley and Suzuki, they joust with railing! Suzuki kicks low to then boot Moxley in the head. Taichi meanwhile shifts to a cobra twist to bend and stretch Okada.

Okada continues to endure as Taichi thrashes him around in that hold. Suzuki returns to ringside just to kick at commentary. Taichi stands on Okada and mocks him about not having Moxley to tag to. Taichi drags Okada up and over to bump off the buckle pad. Suzuki tags in and now he gets to club Okada down. Suzuki drags Okada back up for another chinlock, trapping an arm. Okada endures as Suzuki cranks harder. Fans rally and Okada fights, but Suzuki shifts to a headscissor squeeze. Okada still endures, so Suzuki lets up to tag Taichi. Taichi gives toying kicks while Moxley can be heard dragging himself back to ringside. Taichi cranks Okada’s neck again and then gets forehead to forehead. Okada throws big forearms back, and blocks the kick! Okada whips Taichi to a corner but misses the big elbow, Taichi enziguris! Suzuki runs over to BOOT Moxley down! Off come Taichi’s tearaway pants!

Taichi swings a kick but misses, and Okada Alabama lifts. Taichi fights out of it, to powerbomb, only for Okada to huricanrana out of it! Okada runs corner to corner but misses again, only to get Taichi up! Alabama, AIR RAID CRASH! Both men are down and fans rally up. Okada crawls and so does Taichi, hot tags to Moxley and Suzuki! Moxley fires off on Suzuki but Suzuki fires back! MOxley knees low then puts Suzuki in a corner. Suzuki reverses the whip but Moxley comes back with a clothesline! Moxley hurries to get Suzuki up, spin-out backbreaker! Cover, TWO! Suzuki survives and Moxley’s eye bandage is coming loose. Moxley ignores it as he puts Suzuki in a Cloverleaf, to a Figure Four!

Suzuki endures the modified hold and reaches for the ropes. Moxley rolls him away, shifts to an STF! Moxley is showing he can be just as technical as anyone, but Suzuki powers up. Suzuki BITES Moxley’s arm! Moxley shoves and bites Suzuki’s FACE! The ref reprimands, Moxley backs off to REGAL KNEE! Cover, TWO!! Suzuki survives but Moxley decks Taichi. Moxley bails out to grab a table from commentary! Moxley dumps all the equipment off and sets the table by the ring. He grabs at Suzuki at the ropes and fans anticipate what’s coming. Moxley suplexes but Suzuki fights out, to a draping triangle! The ref counts, Suzuki lets up at 4, then brings Moxley into the ring. Suzuki wrenches for a takedown! Moxley endures the cross armbreaker while Taichi keeps Okada away! Suzuki is trying to make Moxley a one-eyed, one-armed man!

Moxley reaches with his legs, to get the ROPEBREAK! Suzuki reluctantly lets go before a count, and stomps Moxley to an open corner. Suzuki grinds his boots in but the ref backs him off. The count only stops Suzuki for a moment before coming back with more. Moxley gets up, Suzuki runs in, Moxley LARIATS Suzuki down! Fans are fired up as both men are down! Moxley stands and calls for the end. But Taichi rakes Moxley’s bad eye! Taichi back kicks Moxley but Okada goes for Rainmaker! Taichi ducks but runs into Okada’s uppercut! Okada whips but Taichi denies the dropkick! Taichi gets Okada for a HUGE SAIDO! Moxley dropkicks Taichi out! Suzuki is up and stalking behind Moxley with a smile on his face. Moxley turns around to get forehead to forehead, and the brawl begins again!

Suzuki forearms, then Moxley, and back again, both men just throw heavier and faster! And the SLAPS! Moxley staggers Suzuki then headbutts. Double dirty bird but no Dirty Deeds as Suzuki slaps back! Suzuki gets around to the SLEEPER! Moxley reaches but Suzuki keeps him from ropes. Moxley fades, but Suzuki spins him around! Gotch lift, PILEDRIVER! Cover, Suzuki-Gun wins!!

Winner: Suzuki-Gun, by pinfall

The Meanest Man in the World pins the IWGP United States Champion! Their title match is coming in Osaka, who leaves their with the title? As for Taichi, his fight with Okada is just a day away, so he’s getting in his shots now! Taichi chokes Okada at the railing, using camera cable to keep him bound! Even Miho Abe is shocked to see her maestro doing this! Okada has faded out but Taichi won’t let him go. Suzuki walks away, having done what he needs to. Taichi still continues, and puts Okada back in the ring. Taichi grabs his mic stand and HITS the ref! That’s a fine.

Young Lions run in but are hit back out! Taichi uses the stand to choke Okada even more! Okada is purple as Taichi finally drops him. But this isn’t the end. Taichi has the IRON CLAW of Izuka! He equips it onto his hand and watches Okada rise. Okada ducks and dropkicks Taichi back! Then a whip and another dropkick! Fans cheer as Okada drags Taichi up. But Zack Sabre Junior jumps in! ZSJ puts Okada in a sleeper hold, continuing where Taichi left off! Then ZSJ feeds Okada to the CLAW!! Will Ospreay runs in to go after ZSJ! They have their own fight coming, but Taichi distracts Ospreay look enough for ZSJ to scoop him! ZACK DRIVER! Taichi and Ospreay stand over Chaos’s top two! Will Sapporo see the sliest and the meanest conquering the world’s best?

But before Taichi leaves, he calls for a mic. Taichi gets the mic and tells Okada while he’s down on the ramp, “You’re pretty beaten up, huh?” The worst possible state. So there’s no doubt that Taichi wins their 1v1 match, just like when Okada was just a Young Lion. And Taichi will finally have his moment in the main event! Okada can rest up now, so he can give it his all, and then Taichi will beat him down again. Taichi mocks the fans, saying they can cheer all they want, but they’ll go home upset because Taichi won.

 

NEVER Openweight Championship: Hirooki Goto VS Shingo Takagi!

The Fierce Warrior and the Last Dragon have met in the past, and it was truly Strong Style. But now they meet with gold on the line! If Goto fought as hard as he did without a title, how much harder will he fight to keep one?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and this battle of Shingo’s attempt at becoming Double NEVER Openweight Champion begins!

The fans are already fired up as these two stare down. The Takagi fans are very loud as he circles with Goto. They tie up, and are fairly even in power. They break and circle again. Another tie up, and Goto headlocks. Shingo powers out but nether falls from the shoulder collision. Nor the second one. Goto kicks then runs, rams Shingo but Shingo rebounds to ram back. Goto comes back with another shoulder, but still neither falls! Goto throws a forearm but Shingo gives it back. Now we have a brawl between these behemoths, and it speeds up! Shingo gets the edge then runs, but Goto follows. Shingo still gets the fireman’s carry but Goto slips out!

Goto dragon sleeper but Shingo snapmares free. Shingo runs, Goto avoids the sliding lariat but Shingo avoids the buzzsaw. Shingo waistlocks but Goto elbows free. Goto runs to ram, Shingo comes back but Goto runs him over! Fans cheer as Goto brings Shingo up to whip. Goto elbows Shingo down, covers, ONE, but clamps on with a chinlock. Fans rally and duel as Shingo endures. Goto drives an elbow into the forehead and has Shingo down. Shingo gets to a corner but Goto stomps away. Goto throws forearms, too, and then eggs Shingo on. Shingo turns it around to give forearms, but so does Goto. Shingo shoves but gets ROCKED by that right! Goto brings Shingo up as fans rally again.

Goto whips, Shingo reverses and then runs in. Shingo blocks the boot to corner clothesline! Fans fire up as Shingo whips but Goto reverses. Goto hits his own clothesline then runs more, but Shingo withstands this new clothesline! Shingo runs and clotheslines but Goto also stays standing. Shingo clotheslines, runs but Goto swats him away! Goto runs but into a back elbow, and Shingo JABS to the left hand lariat! Fans fire up again as Goto gets to ropes. Shingo clotheslines Goto out of the ring! Shingo goes out to fetch Goto as fans rally and duel. He holds up the NEVER Openweight title to shout that it’ll be his soon enough! Shingo then kicks Goto while he’s down before bringing him up and throwing him into a post!

Camera men clear out as Shingo kicks Goto more. Shingo brings Goto up and whips him into railing! Goto comes back, but runs into the fireman’s carry and snake eyes! Then a DDT to the floor! Shingo stands over Goto as fans cheer. Shingo says hi to Sho as he puts Goto back in the ring. Goto is down and Shingo slingshots to drop a knee! The ref reprimands Shingo as he stands on Goto’s body. Shingo jumps to double stomp Goto! Fans rally and duel again as Shingo brings Goto up. Goto chops and kicks and staggers Shingo! Then a snapmare to a back kick. Shingo eggs Goto on, but that one does sting. Goto eggs Shingo on and they trade CHOPS! Goto then Shingo then back again! Shingo DOUBLE CHOPS Goto down! Shingo drags Goto up and suplexes high and hard! Cover, TWO!

Shingo keeps his cool as he stands on Goto’s head. He mocks Goto and then toys with him. Fans rally and duel as Shingo knees Goto. Goto eggs Shingo on then blocks one of those kicks. But Shingo deflects the headbutt, only to walk into the DISCUS! Shingo rolls away to ropes while Goto steadies himself. Both men end up in opposite corners, and Goto runs in. Goto hits a wheel kick but Shingo blocks the saido! Shingo elbows then underhooks, but Goto blocks the lift. Shingo shifts but it’s Goto who suplexes! Cover, TWO! Fans cheer as Goto keeps his focus. Goto drags Shingo back up, fireman’s carries, but Shingo slips out. Shingo waistlocks, Goto standing switches but Shingo elbows free. Shingo runs but into a sleeper!

Goto squeezes tight but Shingo makes him a backpack for a senton! But Goto sits up to get the sleeper again! They both stand up and Shingo pries free. Goto counters the shoulder breaker into the sleeper! Shingo backs up into a corner and Goto hits buckles. Shingo is free again and sees Goto coming. But Goto counters Shingo’s counter back into the sleeper, only for Shingo to slip out! Underhooks and lift, NOSHIGAMI! Fans fire up as Shingo gets to his feet. Shingo catches his breath before bringing Goto back up. Goto anchors a foot so Shingo drives in elbows until Goto sits put. Shingo drops a knee, runs and SLIDING LARIAT! He keeps going, but Goto fireman’s carries for USHIGOROSHI! Both men are down now and Sapporo fires up!

Goto and Shingo slowly crawl and again go to opposite corners. Goto shouts at Shingo as he stands, and Shingo shouts back. They run at each other and collide with clotheslines! Both men stagger, then collide again! And again! Shingo fires up but Goto keeps with him on those clotheslines. Goto fires up but Shingo keeps with him in return. Goto runs but Shingo swats and SAIDO! But Goto is right back up to SAIDO Shingo! Fans are fired up even more as both men are down again. Goto doesn’t waste time getting Shingo up. Goto hits and runs but Shingo follows to clothesline at the ropes! Shingo runs but Goto returns the favor, only to run into an elbow and the jab! Shingo powers up his left but Goto LARIATS with the right! Cover, TWO!! Shingo survives but Goto won’t stop here.

Fans get loud as Goto runs, but Shingo dodges. DOUBLE CLOTHESLINE, and yet Shingo stays up! Shingo brings Goto up despite being dead weight, and whips him corner to corner. But Goto stumbles and falls, and Red Shoes checks on him. Fans rally up and Goto finds the strength to stand. Shingo runs in to corner clothesline! Shingo fireman’s carries Goto to bring him up to the top rope! Fans worry now but Goto fights back with elbows. Shingo just chuckles and keeps hold, SUPER DEATH VALLEY DRIVER! Cover, TWO!! Goto still lives and Sapporo is amazed! Shingo gets back up and wants to end it now. He puts Goto up top and climbs up to join him.

Goto fights back with haymakers and body shots but Shingo slaps away! Goto gives big forearms and a headbutt! He drags Shingo in and stands up, SUPER SUNSET BOMB! Cover, TWO!?! Shingo survives now but Goto won’t let up. Goto drags Shingo back to his feet, turns him around, but Shingo gets a ropebreak! Goto throws knees to then suplex and drape Shingo for a draping inverted GTR! Cover, TWO!! Shingo still survives but Goto keeps on him with swift kicks to the chest! Kick after kick but Goto keeps going, harder and faster! Goto builds power but Shingo blocks! Shingo puts the legs on the rope and has Goto draping, to STEAL the GTR! Shingo then runs to AX BOMBER!! Cover, TWO!?! Goto survives but Shingo doesn’t waste time being shocked!

Sapporo is thunderous as Shingo stands and Goto slowly rises. Shingo drags Goto up to pump handle, but Goto slips out! Goto dragon sleepers but Shingo spins around to suplex. Goto blocks to suplex back, SHOUTEN KAI!! Cover, TWO!!! That still wasn’t enough to finish Shingo! Goto crawls as fans rally harder. Goto stands on wobbly legs but Shingo rises. Shingo sits up, Goto powers up, BUZZSAW! Goto drags Shingo up but Shingo headbutts! Double headbutt! And again! And again! They’re like rams, but without the helmet-like horns to help them. Goto fires off so many forearms but Shingo just glares back. Goto keeps throwing but Shingo keeps egging him on. Shingo then throws elbows from all sides! He ROCKS Goto but Goto glares back. Now Goto backs Shingo down just by taking the forearms!

Shingo slaps, Goto SLAPS! JAB! JAB! Shingo and Goto ram heads again! Goto headbutts over and over and over, and then finally hits REVERSE GTR! Then TRUE- NO! Shingo fights the real deal off but Goto swings him out in a ripcord. Shingo counters to pump handle and lift, MADE IN JAPAN!! Cover, TWO!?!? But how?!? Is Goto more than human!? Shingo himself can’t believe it! Fans reach that fever pitch as Shingo grabs at Goto. Shingo brings Goto to his feet as fans duel as hard as ever! Shingo lifts Goto back up, LAST OF THE DRAGONS!! Shingo WINS!

Winner: Shingo Takagi by pinfall (NEW NEVER Openweight Champion)

NJPW, and Los Ingobernables de Japon, have TWO double champions now! Shingo Takagi owns the NEVER Openweight Division after an incredible fight with The Fierce Warrior! Is this a sign that LIJ is going to take over NJPW in the New Decade?

Red Shoes presents Shingo with the belt, and Shingo gets himself a mic. Fans cheer as Shingo wants everyone to wait a moment. Shingo wants them to understand how great tonight is for him. He feels like crap, yet also feels awesome! Shingo says that what we saw IS NEVER Openweight wrestling! And that while he has the title, this isn’t the end, but the beginning! Shingo will combine the NEVER Openweight Championship with his soul, and together they will rise to new heights! The top title in NJPW may be the IWGP Heavyweight Championship, but the top title in Shingo’s life is the NEVER Openweight one. Therefore, if the Heavyweight title is #1, the Openweight title is THE one! Shingo vows to “tear it up” with this title in NJPW and around the world. The fans will come along with him as he flies high like the dragon he is! Confetti flies for Shingo on this victorious night. Will Shingo revolutionize what it means to hold this title?

 


 

My Thoughts:

NJPW does it again with another great event! And to think this is just part one of the Sapporo event, on top of a United States event in between! As for this part of Sapporo, I made sure to hit a major highlight in the Moxley-Okada VS Suzuki-Taichi match. That was great just on the names teaming together, i.e. Moxley and Okada. They made a pretty good combination, though they didn’t really work together directly. It was a very chaotic match that went all over the arena and it was great. It was a natural move for Suzuki-Gun to win, putting Moxley’s IWGP United States title reign in question for next week’s Osaka event, but also for Taichi to stand tall over Okada.

Throwing Ospreay and ZSJ in was a nice surprise, and it puts the math on both those matches that Chaos might be able to rise up. Okada is more likely to beat Taichi than Ospreay is ZSJ since Ospreay VS ZSJ is a title match. I’m not sure how likely ZSJ is to lose that title in just the New Beginning event. Then Shingo VS Goto, hot damn that was a good match. And I was really surprised to see Shingo win, since he becomes the other dual champion alongside Naito. But Shingo has had a story of wanting to face anyone and everyone, regardless of weight class. I also like the plug of Sho being a future challenger, that will be great for Sho’s singles career even in losing. The NEVER Openweight Division seemed a bit in flux since Goto was always winning that title, but I really hope Shingo takes the singles title for a good long run.

My Score: 9/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s ROH Death Before Dishonor Results & Report! (7/26/24)

YEEHAW!

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The word of the day is, “Gold!”

ROH brings Death Before Dishonor to Texas, and makes it bigger than ever! SIX championship matches, how drastically will the landscape change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – MXM Collection VS Spanish Announce Project; wins.
  • Komander VS The Beast Mortos; wins.
  • Texas Deathmatch: Leyla Hirsch VS Diamante; wins.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championship Qualifier: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS The Dark Order; wins and advances to Battle of the Belts 11.
  • ROH World Tag Team Championships: The Kingdom VS Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O’Reilly; win(s) and
  • ROH World Television Championship Survival of the Fittest: Atlantis Jr. VS Lio Rush VS Shane Taylor VS Johnny TV VS Lee Johnson VS Brian Cage; wins and
  • ROH Pure Championship: Wheeler Yuta VS Lee Moriarty; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship: Billie Starkz VS Red Velvet; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Championship: Athena VS Queen Aminata; wins and
  • ROH World Championship: Mark Briscoe VS Roderick Strong; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 7.25.2024

Slammiversary Fallout! Where do things go on the way to Victory Road?

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Well now we start the fall out of Slammiversary. Josh Alexander in his bad bitch summer, X-Speedball legacy, ABC got the t-a-g and Jordynne is still in charge of the Knockouts division. Like I said at the end of Slammiversary, all of the champions being Babyfaces is stupid. They need to drop a couple titles fairly quickly, because I don’t care what some people say, Nic Nemeth ain’t gonna bring any eyes to the brand. He’s about as hot as day old Hamburger Helper over a camping sterno.

We’ll probably open with the luke warm champion, so tune in like 10 minutes late for anything of substance to be happen.

https://x.com/i/status/1816629254349533588

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner: Maclin wins via KIA – *
  • AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan: AJ wins via Down Payment – **
  • Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young): Hammer Your ASH wins via Torture Rack – ** 1/2
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey): Broken Alphabet wins via Twist & Splash – ***

 

Results:

Nemeth gives the ole “I’ll be a fighting champion…blah blah” promo and drops the “any company” line that we’ve already understood what that means. Campaign Singh cuts him off…and I never thought I’d be happy for Campaign Singh to walk out and say anything…ever. And…Mustafa’s promo is worse than Dolph’s. He’s gone from parody to caricature even saying “it was the biggest screw job Montreal ever saw”. Like some of these lines are cheap heat, but most are just brain dead comments that wouldn’t get a reaction out of anyone (and the crowd was silent for that comment). Mustafa gets caught in an Archer “phrasing” moment about getting screwed hard, but this is painful. Promos written by 14 year olds everyone…

This ends with Ali challenging Nemeth for the World Title. While I’m not against walk up challenges, I watch Japanese wrestling, I don’t really get the point aside from doing it just to do it. 

ABC and Matt Hardy have a small promo, and I’m still not really a fan of Unbroken Matt Version 6.0. The floating between Broken voice and his normal voice sounds amateurish.

OH LOOK, finally a match 20 minutes into the show. And it’s my son Steve Maclin! OH CHRIST he’s facing Deaner. This has been 25 minutes of talking followed by the worst god damn attempt at a gimmick. Deaner’s little “Papa Santino told me I can wipe my ass only if the crowd agrees”. This gimmick should die in a fire.

Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner

Deaner started off quick because Maclin was in disbelief that Deaner was actually gonna fight him. Maclin dodges a Crossbody, Busaiku Knee, and just starts beating on Deaner for fun. And this is fun, maybe Maclin can make sure Deaner gets stretchered out and written off forever. How do you call for an ambulance in French? Maclin with the old Back Breaker into a stretch. Deaner tries to nerd rage up, breaks the Back Breaker Stretch, his punch combo, into a Manhattan Drop and Bulldog. Deaner hits the Crossbody, but Maclin kicks out. This is entirely too competitive.

Deaner goes for the Deaner DDT, blocked, Olympic Slam into Splashing Deaner into the corner, Caught in the Crosshairs, K-I-A, thanks for coming you damn dweeb. Stay in Canada and don’t travel Deaner, please.

https://x.com/i/status/1816633784537874761

AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan

As the bell sounds, Sami knocks Rich off the apron, Low Bridges AJ, does the Beats of the Bodhran on AJ and then AJ eats the offense and strategizes with his crew. Bishop and Rich swarm the ring, Sami allows himself to get distracted so AJ slides in and starts beating on Sami. AJ throats Sami across the middle rope and Rich makes his presence felt, AJ distracts the referee and Rich gets in a lot of cheap shots. Bishop throws Sami back in the ring, and AJ keeps up the pressure. Lots of 5 count chokes and leverage moves. After the commercial break ends, Sami dodges a Tennessee Whiskey Knee, gets in a few shots before Rich trips Sami as he’s setting up a Dive, and then AJ takes advantage of the position and hits the goofball knee strike.

AJ calls for his Chokeslam, Sami tries to break it with Axe Handles, then claws the eyes. Sami goes for a Scoop Slam, gets him part way up and then falls over. AJ Chokeslam again, but he bites his hand and starts fighting back. Launches himself at AJ, sends him bouncing off the ropes and uses the momentum to hit that Scoop Slam that was teased earlier. Sami goes for a Western Lariat but eats a Big Boot. AJ does a little Hulk Hogan pose to signal a Leg Drop, but Sami dodges and then connects on a Sliding Lariat. Thumbs Up, Thumbs….interference. Rich distracts the ref, Bishop lays out Sami, AJ connects with the Down Payment.

Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young)

ASH and Jordynne exchange slaps and then Jordynne starts to out muscle ASH. Spinebuster from Jordynne, Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights off, rope run, Sattelite DDT into both tagging out. EY does the Flair corner flop, slides back in between Hammer’s legs, and connects on a Neckbreaker. EY is the quicker of the two, but Hammer finally gets his hands on him and a Release Belly to Belly into a full mount raining of fists, then a near fall. Hammer smashes EY in a corner, Arm Wringer into an Irish Whip across, but EY moves and Hammer tags out to ASH. ASH levels Jordynne, peppers EY with a few shots and pulls him back to their corner and starts some tandem offense with Hammerman. Hammer Guerilla Presses ASH and throws her into EY for a near fall. Hammer looks to aim for either a Powerbomb or Nightmare Pendulum, but EY drops it into a Small Package, pinfall kick out, they both run, Double Lariat spot. The Knockouts get tagged in.

Jordynne is in control early, World’s Strongest Slam into a Vader Bomb. Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights it off and tags out to Hammer. Jordynne and EY do some schoolyard stuff with the old Push while Jordynne is down to trip Hammer. All four get in, ASH gets leveled, EY gets leveled, Hammer and Jordynne have a brief face off, but Hammer throws Jordynne to the apron and ASH connects with a Meteora from the apron. Death Valley Driver from Young on Hammer, ASH stares in shock, EY tells her to get, ASH runs away. EY goes up for his Macho Elbow, and ASH causes him to fall to Hammer’s feet, Torture Rack, and EY submits.

Josh Alexander comes out, with new heel music. And it’s not that bad, definitely better than some other people’s new music. Josh yells at the crowd a bit, says he can’t wait til he’s back in a real Canadian town, like his home of Toronto. Then he drops the mic in lieu of an explanation. The crowd chants him off with the “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey”. 

https://x.com/i/status/1816647373654724937

The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey)

JDC and Hardy start, but JDC quickly tags out to Myers and that doesn’t go well. Hardy grabs a hold of Myers, a few Delete chops, drags him to his corner and they all get in a few shots punctuated with Hardy getting tagged back in and an Elbow into Myers’ extended and worked on left arm. Myers stays isolated, back into the corner, Boot to the gut, Ace tags in and wallops Myers. Ace connects on Double Kicks, into Russian Leg Sweep and his half of Click Click Boom, for a 2 count. Myers finally gets free with a Jaw Breaker and tags out to Eddie. But The System gets no momentum, Ace stifles Eddie’s offense and starts a few quick tags with him and Bey for tandem offense. Moose finally comes down the ramp as Eddie kicked out of yet another pinfall attempt because The System has had nothing going for them. Eddie finally gets some offense since Moose was a big enough distraction.

Eddie thinks they have a spot, so he tags back in JDC, but The ABC stop him cold, tag in Matt Hardy, and Matt walks down JDC, but JDC Low Bridges. Matt is on the outside, so all of The System surrounds Hardy, then Joe Hendry’s music hits! That stops the heel beatdown, and we follow Hendry’s entire entrance. So that proves Hendry is bigger than the 8 other people in this frame. Not really sure if that’s optics you want to push along. Ace and JDC try to remind people there’s wrestling going on, but JDC thumbs the eye to get a little something going. Vertical Suplex for a near fall, tag out for Eddie and Eddie lights up Ace with some of those NOAH Chops. Ace retreats to the ropes and Alisha chokes him with the ropes while the ref is distracted.

Myers gets tagged in, Ace tries to use the crowd energy, Myers stops it at first but then Ace slips a Scoop Slam and tags out to Bey. Hot tag, strike rush, Double Stomp, educated feet, Leap Frog to the corner but Lish climbs on the apron and yells at Bey which stops his rhythm. Myers kicks his feet out and causes Bey to crash. Eddie tags in for a few shots, then to JDC and Slingshot Knees, Wringer Snapmare, Bow and Arrow Submission, and JDC is just doing solid wrestling work right now. Uppercut between the Shoulder Blades as Bey tries to get out, tag to Myers and Bey is still eating offense. Eddie tags in, Bey tries the Sunset Flip, but Eddie tags out before going over, so Myers folds up Bey for a near fall and then tags out to JDC who connects on a Standing Suplex, slams Bey’s face into the corner, Eddie tags in, and Bey finally fights up to his feet, Eddie just flatten Bey’s comeback, tries a Tiger Driver but eats an Enzuigiri for a simultaneous tag. JDC and Hardy come in, JDC tries to exit halfway in, but Hardy is wrecking shop. He disposes of Eddie, Myers slides in but eats a tandem Neckbreaker/DDT from Hardy. Face team does the Delete Corner Face Smashes. Poetry in Motion into a Side Effect into Corkscrew Swanton for only 2 since Myers breaks it up! Everyone throwing hands, referee is distracted, Moose comes in to Spear Hardy, but Hardy dodges and throws him into JDC (I get the call back), Hendry then lays out Moose with the big Lariat. Twist of Fate from Hardy, Splash from Bey, Broken Alphabet wins!

 

Overall Score: 4/10

Ugh, cliche promos, too damn much talking, a competitive squash match with an imbecile as our first “match”, into an overbooked and slow heel match, finally a decent tag match (with the right team going over), into another overbooked match with a “tease” for the mystery backup being more obvious than Jericho’s WWF debut.

Aside from the afore mentioned tag match, The Rascalz promo and The System Promo; this was hard to watch. A lot of cornball promos, Rosemary licks her conspiracy board, storylines got zero traction. Whoopity Doo, Ryan Nemeth got a match next week and we get an undead wedding.

While this was a bad episode, it was bad by at least new standards. We’re not back in the TNA Dark Days again, but this was…a useless show.


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