GOLD~ BERG~ is back again, and he wants answers!

But will MVP and Bobby Lashley give him the answers he wants to hear? Or will they continue to ice him out of the WWE World Championship scene?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

• 2v1 Handicap: Veer & Shanky w/ Jinder Mahal VS Drew McIntyre; McIntyre wins, by disqualification.
• Rhea Ripley VS Nia Jax w/ Shayna Baszler; Ripley wins.
• Mustafa Ali & Mansoor VS Mace & T-Bar; Mace & T-Bar win.
• “Doudrop” Piper Niven w/ Eva Marie VS Tamina; Tamina wins.
• Damian Priest VS John Morrison w/ The Miz; Priest wins.
• Damian Priest & Ricochet VS Sheamus & John Morrison w/ The Miz; Priest & Ricochet win.
• Matt Riddle VS Omos; Omos wins.
• Karrion Kross VS Keith Lee; Lee wins.
• WWE 24/7 Championship: Reggie VS ???; Reggie wins and retains the title.
• No Holds Barred: Nikki A.S.H. VS Charlotte Flair; Nikki wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Bobby Lashley is here!

Though of course the All Mighty WWE World Champion would be here to open the night! He and MVP are dressed sharply as usual, too, and Chicago gives them a mixed reaction. MVP gets a mic to say, “CHI Town! Welcome back to Monday Night Raw! Where y’all been?” Now everyone is excited to see GOLD~ BERG~, but before he shows up, Lashley has asked MVP to address some things. Goldberg showed up uninvited to challenge Lashley for HIS WWE Championship. Lashley has not dignified that challenge with a response, so let’s address a few things. “Without question, Goldberg is an icon, a GOAT, a WWE Hall of Famer, still capable of annihilating any man on any given night. But you see, there in lies the problem. He didn’t challenge any man, he challenged THE ALL MIGHTY!”

Goldberg is a gladiator and he’s used to stepping into the coliseum and crushing any gladiator that stands before him. But Lashley isn’t a gladiator, he’s a KAIJU! An unstoppable monster! So MVP is here to try and stop a tragedy from unfolding. Fans chant for “GOLD~BERG~!” but MVP wants them all to listen, including Goldberg himself. If Lashley accepts this challenge, it won’t end well for Goldberg! It could be Goldberg’s final match! So Mr. Goldberg, Bill if he may, MVP asks if Goldberg wants to be remembered as a champion, or as a casualty? He asks the fans this, but Goldberg makes his entrance!

Lashley watches closely as said icon makes his way out on stage and fires himself up in the pyro! Goldberg gives his son, Gage, a quick side hug in the front row before heading into the ring. Lashley is stoic as Goldberg has a mic to call him out. “Let’s get something straight. If anybody should be worried about losing something, it’s you losing the WWE Championship.” After listening to MVP’s intro, Goldberg’s sure MVP’s nothing but scared! And the same goes for Lashley! Now, Goldberg knows what Bobby’s thinking. Bobby’s a high level athlete, a gladiator. But, high level athletes still question themselves. The gladiator still shows weakness.

So then, does Lashley think he’s up for the challenge? Because the first time he saw Goldberg walk up, he thought Goldberg was his victim. Lashley thought Goldberg was the next gladiator stepping into his coliseum. But guess what, Lashley? This ain’t YOUR coliseum! This is CHICAGO. And the fans can smell fear a mile away! Lashley either crapped his pants or he’s scared out of his mind! It doesn’t matter if Goldberg’s 35, 45 or 105, Goldberg will always be Goldberg! Goldberg lives by the Spear, and Lashley will die by the Spear! That’s why Goldberg is Goldberg. And because he’s Goldberg, at SummerSlam, Lashley’s next!

Mic drop from the icon, but what will Lashley’s response be? MVP points out Gage, Lashley walks right up to him, and tells him he’s gonna break his dad. MVP tells Gage that Lashley will end Goldberg’s career, and Gage will be crying at home. It’ll be over! Done! The career is done! But Goldberg comes back to SPEAR MVP! Goldberg and Gage leave as Lashley scrapes MVP off the ground, father warning Lashley not to mess with his son. Will much worse happen should these two clash at SummerSlam?

Drew McIntyre is on standby backstage.

He, his claymore, and Sarah wait for their cute, and the sword is almost as tall as she is! We’ll see the Scottish Warrior go into a 2v1 Handicap against Mahal’s minions, after the break.

2v1 Handicap: Veer & Shanky w/ Jinder Mahal VS Drew McIntyre!

The Modern Day Maharaja stands with his men in the ring as Raw returns, and here comes McIntyre! And he keeps his claymore, now named Angela in honor of his late mother, right with him as he storms the ring! Mahal and friends bail out, then have a quick huddle up to figure out how to handle this. Shanky’s still not 100% from how his arm is wrapped but perhaps Veer makes up for that. They go to the ring, take their time getting in, and the bell rings. McIntyre smirks as he and Veer circle, they tie up and Veer hits low. McIntyre fires off hands in the corner, CHOPS Veer then COHPS him again. McIntyre fires off haymakers, stomps but the ref reprimands. Veer throat chops!

The ref reprimands Veer now but Veer throws clubbing shots. Tag to Shanky, they both bring McIntyre across the way to POST him! Mahal applauds but fans boo as Shanky gets McIntyre up for back elbows. Shanky punches, McIntyre CHOPS! McIntyre runs but Shanky clotheslines him down! Cover, ONE! Shanky gets McIntyre up to tag in Veer. Veer runs to SPLASH, then keeps moving to BODY PRESS! Cover, TWO! Veer growls, runs, but McIntyre avoids the leaping elbow drop! McIntyre starts to seethe and fans fire up as he rallies on Veer with clotheslines! McIntyre whips and CLOBBERS Veer, then gets him up for an OVERHEAD Belly2Belly!

Veer staggers back up, swings on McIntyre but ends up in a NECKBREAKER! McIntyre kips up, taunts Shanky, then sucker punches him! Veer gets up, into a SPINEBUSTER! McIntyre wants the countdown, but Shanky anchors McIntyre’s foot! Mahal gets in with a chair to JAM and SMACK McIntyre!

Winner: Drew McIntyre, by disqualification

Mahal SMACKS McIntyre again, then Shanky gets himself a chair! They want to get the revenge for all those chair shots! McIntyre sees he’s in a bad way against three angry men with chairs, but again, he has his SWORD! And he SMACKS Mahal’s chair right out of his hands! Veer tries, but gets a GLASGOW KISS! Shanky doesn’t want anything worse than what he got, so he pleads with McIntyre to just let him leave. Shanky drops the chair as McIntyre points his sword, and then McIntyre reels back! Shanky runs away, but it was just a fake out. Team Mahal hurries backstage and Kevin Patrick asks what happened. Mahal says McIntyre is insane! He threatened their lives with that sword! But karma will come around for McIntyre, just you wait and see!

Nia Jax & Shayna Baszler speak.

The Irresistible Force says, “If you’re shocked by what you just saw, just wait until you see what I do to Rhea Ripley.” Will the Nightmare be able to survive Nia’s brutality to stay on track for SummerSlam’s Raw Women’s Championship Triple Threat?

Backstage interview with McIntyre.

Kevin Patrick asks about Mahal, Veer & Shanky being quite alarmed over McIntyre having his sword ringside. Does he care to comment? Well to be fair, he didn’t finish the job. Chicago is bloodthirsty, though, they wanted him to finish the job. And McIntyre might just do that. It’s good that Mahal gets away because then he has to think about McIntyre. Mahal has to spend the next several nights with nightmares about McIntyre. Mahal knows what’s coming and McIntyre loves it. Mahal can choose the hospital (McIntyre’s left hand), the graveyard (his right hand), or Angela. Mahal knows McIntyre enough to know that that wasn’t a threat, it was a promise! Will McIntyre get to keep that promise on the way to SummerSlam?

Rhea Ripley VS Nia Jax w/ Shayna Baszler!

The Irresistible Force is already in the ring as Rhea makes her entrance, now with sound effects. The bell rings, the two circle and they tie up. Nia shoves Rhea away and tells the fans to calm down a bit. Rhea comes back, ties up with Nia again, but Nia puts her in a corner. The ref counts, Nia lets off, and Shayna taunts Rhea. Rhea BOOTS Nia, then HEADBUTTS! But Nia stays up! She HEADBUTTS Rhea down! Nia gets Rhea up to POST her with one arm! Then she goes out to the apron to run in and HIP ATTACK Rhea into the post! Nia goes back in the ring as Rhea flop over, but Rhea kicks from below! Nia staggers but shoves Rhea away, but Rhea ducks and dodges to KICK Nia in the back!

Rhea pump handles but Nia elbows out hard, and POSTS Rhea again! Nia goes back outside, grins, runs in, but Rhea moves this time! Nia hip attacks the post! Nia tumbles down to the floor, Shayna checks on her, and Rhea goes out to aim and CANNONBALL! Nia moves, Shayna takes the shot! Nia fireman’s carries to SAMOAN DROP into the barrier! Fans boo Nia and Rhea writhes while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns and Nia has Rhea in a torture rack! Rhea endures as fans rally up, but Nia grins as she bends Rhea back. Rhea elbows free, ROCKS Nia with forearms, then gets around to LARIAT! Nia stays up so Rhea keeps throwing clotheslines! Nia swings back, Rhea gets around and CLUBS her! Then she springboard RANAS!! Rhea goes out of her usual playbook and sends Nia to a corner! Rhea runs in, is put on the apron, but she ROUNDHOUSES Nia away! Rhea climbs, aims, leaps, and missile dropkicks Nia down! Cover, TWO! The ref checks on Nia, she’s bleeding from somewhere on her face.

Rhea gets up, gets Nia up but Nia throws body shots and clubbing elbows. Nia reels Rhea in, smiles through the blood, and gets Rhea up, but Rhea fights the bomb to a sunset flip! Nia stays up, sits down, but Rhea moves! Nia lands on her butt, but she gets up to CLOBBER Rhea! And then runs to drop the leg, brother! Cover, TWO!! Rhea survives and Nia’s shock shows through that crimson mask! Nia gets Rhea up, fireman’s carries, but Rhea slips off to CLUB her! Pump handle, but Shayna distracts! Rhea gets in Shayna’s face, but senses Nia coming! Rhea dodges and rolls Nia up, and WINS!

Winner: Rhea Ripley, by pinfall

Shayna is seething and biting her thumb as Rhea snatches that one away! Nia isn’t any happier, and she argues with Shayna. Shayna gets heated and takes off her jacket! Fans fire up as the arguing gets even more heated, but then Nia laughs it off and Shayna storms up the ramp. Is that tag team finally breaking apart? But then Rhea ROUNDHOUSES Nia and gets her RIPTIDE!! The Nightmare shows no mercy, and that is a message to both Charlotte Flair and Nikki A.S.H! Will nothing stop Rhea from getting the Raw Women’s title back?

Mustafa Ali & Mansoor VS Mace & T-Bar!

The tag team debut of The Beacon & the Star of Saudi Arabia was shockingly successful, especially if you asked Ali himself. Will it be no less shocking the second time? Or will the walking, talking extinction level events get revenge?

Raw returns as Mansoor makes his entrance, followed by Ali’s. Mansoor’s still pumped, Ali still wants him to be serious, but Chicago is fired up for their hometown hero! The bell rings, Mansoor and Mace start, but T-Bar swipes at Mansoor. Mansoor is distracted, and Mace CLOBBERS ALI! Mansoor realizes he’s alone but he fires off on Mace! Mace knees and whips Mansoor to the corner but Mansoor fights back! Only to get a LEG LARIAT! Tag to T-Bar, he goes out to CLOBBER Ali and turn him inside out! Mace scoops and SLAMS Mansoor, T-Bar springboards in for an ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO!! Mansoor survives but T-Bar gets him back up.

T-Bar drags Mansoor into position and gets him up, but Mansoor slips out of the bomb to ENZIGURI! Ali drags himself up the corner, fans fire up for him and Mansoor crawls, hot tag to Ali! Chicago’s own fires off a dropkick on Mace, a BOOT to T-Bar, but T-Bar roars! T-Bar runs in but Ali slips out to ROUNDHOUSE! And somersault NECKBREAKER! Fans fire up as T-Bar bails out. Ali builds speed, as does Mansoor, DOUBLE DIVES! Ali takes out T-Bar at the ramp while Mace is sent onto the announce table! And Ali only notices just now! And he starts to like the cohesion! But then T-Bar shoves Ali into the apron then into the ring!

Mansoor hurries around the way but T-Bar BOOTS him! Ali gets T-Bar in the ropes with a TILT-O-WHIRL DRAPING DDT!! Ali wants Mansoor to get in, the tag is made, Mansoor gets T-Bar into the drop zone, only for T-Bar to boot him! Mansoor hits ropes and trips Ali up! Ali crashes down and Mansoor panics. Mansoor hurries up top, but Mace returns to distract! T-Bar YANKS Mansoor down then KNEES Him! CYCLONE KICK!! Cover, T-Bar & Mace win!!

Winners: Mace & T-Bar, by pinfall

Ali gets back up and starts berating Mansoor, but T-Bar & Mace slither back into the ring! They stalk up behind Ali, and he sighs. He shoves Mansoor out of the ring to save him?! Ali alone takes HIGH JUSTICE!! Mansoor crawls back in to check on his teammate. They didn’t win, but given what Ali just did there, is there a friendship starting to grow?

Charlotte Flair heads to the ring!

Before having it out with Nikki A.S.H. in No Holds Barred, the Queen is here to speak her mind. “A few days ago, I woke up to a headline that read, ‘Simone Biles withdraws from the Olympics.’ And I couldn’t help but take a second to think to myself, ‘Why would the greatest gymnast of all time not want to go for the gold anymore?’ And later I discovered it was for mental health concerns.” The more Charlotte learned, the more she couldn’t help but empathize. Now, Charlotte is going somewhere with this so hang on. Two weeks ago, at Money in the Bank, Charlotte defeated Rhea Ripley. Also Becky’s not here, CHARLOTTE sold out the arena. Yes, it’s true.

As she was saying, two weeks ago at MITB, she beat Rhea. Then the next night, Nikki cashes in the MITB contract and illegitimately won- No, STOLE Charlotte’s title! Now Charlotte has been in this business a long time, and when she woke up the next morning, she couldn’t help but think, “What the hell is going on?! I am near a breaking point! I am going to have my own nervous breakdown!” Because Charlotte is the ELEVEN TIME (13 if you count NXT) Women’s Champion!! Do you want to know what that makes her? The most decorated woman in the HISTORY of this business!

Charlotte starts going outside the ring as she says she believes, as she believes the fans believe, that cashing in the MITB contract “is the most cowardly way to win a title in this business!” It is not competition, it is THEFT! Charlotte takes a moment to look under the ring. She brings out a kendo stick and says, “Oh yes, I’m gonna beat Nikki Cross with this.” And then a broom?! And ever since the inception of the Women’s MITB Contract, Charlotte’s been cashed-in on not once, not twice, but THREE TIMES! Charlotte caps this off by adding a chair to her collection. It seems like cashing in on Charlotte is the only way women make a name for themselves anymore!

Charlotte goes back into the ring and recounts how she wanted a 1v1 match to show her superiority to the aspiring, wannabe almost superheroes. And when Charlotte won, Nikki had the audacity to say she could still beat Charlotte?! So that’s why she shook Nikki’s hand to then sucker punch her down! The champion is gullible, but the only thing people love more than a champion is a martyr! And Nikki A.S.H. Cross is going to be both! She will be sacrificed in their NHB match! No disqualifications, no count-outs, no hiding from Charlotte. “Anything goes tonight.”

But wait, Nikki is here and she SMACKS Charlotte with the very chair Charlotte brought out!! The Almost a Super Hero gets the drop on the Queen, but will she drop the Queen and prove her point? Can Nikki finally beat Charlotte Flair in a full-on battle?!

Backstage interview with Eva Marie and “Doudrop” Piper Niven at gorilla position.

Kevin Patrick wants to ask something before they have their match. Natalya sustained an injury in the tag match last week, have they heard any updates? Eva cuts off Piper to say, “Who cares about Natalya’s injury? What we should be concerned about is that disgusting smear campaign by Alexa Bliss and that ugly little doll.” How dare Alexa disparage the #EvaLution has accomplished? Take Doudrop, for instance. Before Eva came along, Doudrop was probably some scared, lonely girl living on a farm. Wait, where is she from again? Scot- Actually, it doesn’t matter. The point is, look at her now! And honestly, Kirk, what the hell is the “Lillylution” supposed to be, other than gross?

Last week, Natalya paid the price for getting in the way. Now, so will Tamina. The music hits and the EvaLution heads out. Will Tamina make Eva eat those words while Piper pays the price?

“Doudrop” Piper Niven w/ Eva Marie VS Tamina!

Raw returns as Tamina makes her entrance. The bell rings, Eva gives Piper a high-ten for luck, and then Piper ties up with Tamina. They’re in a deadlock so they break and circle. They tie up again, Piper headlocks, but Tamina powers out. Piper rams Tamina, Tamina comes back and runs Piper over! Tamina fires up and dares Piper to get up. Piper does, and Tamina CLOHTESLINES her in the corner! Tamina runs in to HIP ATTACK! Tamina drags Piper to a drop zone and she climbs up! Eva gets on the apron to distract but Tamina steps and scares Eva! Eva says she was just kidding! But then Piper POSTS Tamina!

Piper gets Tamina in the ropes to CLUB her down! Eva applauds Piper as Piper uses the ropes to springboard ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO! Piper keeps her focus as she keeps on Tamina with a chinlock. Tamina endures, fights up and throws elbows. Piper throws Tamina by her hair! Piper stomps Tamina, runs, and BACK SENTONS! Cover, TWO! Piper and Eva are both frustrated but Piper gets Tamina back up for a seated cobra clutch! Tamina endures, fights up again, and throws body shots, but Piper whips her to a corner. Piper runs in but into a BOOT! Both women are down and Eva panics!

Tamina and Piper slowly get up and Piper throws a haymaker. Tamina hits back, they brawl, Piper shoves Tamina away but Tamina comes back to CLOBBER Piper! Piper staggers to a corner, Tamina runs in to uppercut! Tamina aims but Piper blocks the superkick to kick Tamina’s legs out! Eva then distracts Piper by telling her to go for the crossbody. Piper runs and does go for the crossbody, but Tamina moves! Piper FLOPS, and Tamina gets her up for a SAMOAN DROP! Cover, Tamina wins!

Winner: Tamina, by pinfall

Eva is furious that “Doudrop” lost, but it was her fault for thinking she had to tell Piper what to do! Eva scolds Piper for not listening to her, and then Alexa Bliss laughs from the titantron. “And the loser of this match is EVA~ MARIIIIIIE~!” Alexa mocks Eva again and Eva is even more upset now! Will Eva throw a fit if things keep going wrong for the EvaLution?

Matt Riddle scoots up to Damian Priest backstage.

Sup, padre! New scooter! Omos broke the original, but this stallion was still in the stable. It’s kinda like when Riddle had goldfish and take them to the beach, but then he’d lose them. But then, when he got home, Swim Shady would still be in the tank. Know what he’s saying? Yeah… But is Riddle not worried Omos won’t just broke this one, too? If he was alone, sure. But Riddle has “the power of Randy Orton” coursing through his veins! He has so many voices in his head, he can’t even keep track. Priest believes that. So Riddle’s ready, but also congrats on Priest’s win over Sheamus.

Though, wait, shouldn’t he be out partying, though? Like in the hot tub, with champagne and ladies, instead of going on MizTV? Yeah, usually, but to be honest, Priest got his partying in at Lollapalooza. As for MizTV tonight, Priest’s handled those clowns before, we all remember. But if there are any shenanigans with that whatever stick, Priest will make sure Morrison gets a wheelchair just like The Miz’s. Aw yeah! Good luck out there, bro! Riddle scoots away, will Priest be able to handle whatever Miz ‘n’ Morrison have planned? Speaking of which…

The Miz & John Morrison head to the ring!

The Hollywood A-Lister and Johnny Drip Drip have those very Drip Sticks to SQUIRT SQUIRT and make it rain! Byron Saxton is already on guard as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns and Miz welcomes us to the Most Must-See WWE Talk Show, MizTV, and notes the long history with their guest tonight. Bygones can’t be bygones so easily as Miz welcomes Damian Priest! The Archer of Infamy makes his entrance, goes to the ring, and Morrison wants the “dry amigo” to know this is a #SplashHoleFreeZone. Keep your mouth shut or Morrison will moisten you up! Miz asks John, “Who is the man responsible for putting me in a chair?” Priest. Correct! Who is the man taking advantage of the injured as of late? Priest. Cooorrect! And who is the cheater who ripped Sheamus’ mask off to win last week? PRIEST! COOOOOOOOORRECT!!

Priest asks if these guys are out of their minds. Listen, Sheamus was medically cleared to wrestle. He wore a mask, did what he was supposed to do. And to his credit, Sheamus fought with that injury. That’s badass in Priest’s book, unlike these two. Speaking of which, what is actually wrong with Miz’s knee? Miz is offended but Priest cuts him off by asking, “Are you ever gonna wrestle again?” No, wait, is it to the legs, or maybe more between them? Miz is stunned as he says, “How. Dare. You!” Miz has been in this business for 16 YEARS, and never been injured! One match with Priest, and this happens! Miz can’t even stand! If Miz wasn’t in this chair, he’d smack the taste out Priest’s mouth!

Then do it! Yeah, just like Priest thought. Priest’s dealt with so many people like Miz. When Priest worked at the nightclubs, so many guys would walk in, run their mouths, act like bullies, and then Priest put them in their place. And now that he’s in the WWE, Priest gets to do that in front of every single fan. What was that, ese? Morrison aims the Drip Stick but Miz has him stand down. Morrison says Priest is disrespecting two legends right now! The Drip Stick and Miz’s wheelchair will be in the Museum of Modern Moistness, because kids all around the world dream of growing up to be as half as cool as them! The fans immediately refute that.

Priest is flabbergasted! Estas loco?! There’s not one kid that wants to be second-fiddle. Right, Johnny Sidekick? And while we’re at it, there ain’t a kid who wants to be a loud mouth jackass who uses anyone to get ahead, including his best friend. Watch what you say, Priest, or else! Or else what? “The wet don’t forget, bro.” Morrison will make Priest regret ever saying anything bad about them! What is wrong with these two?! Priest was going to call out Sheamus but he’s pissed off. He’ll fight Morrison here and now in Chi Town! Oh well you’re about to find out that the wet guy’s the best guy! Cuz Morrison ‘n’ Miz are gonna have the last splash! Miz aims the Drip Stick, but Priest plugs it up!!

Priest tosses the Drip Stick but Morrison gets a cheap shot in! Morrison swings on Priest again, but gets a BELL CLAP for it! Priest throws Morrison out, and Miz panics as he’s all alone! Miz can’t get his chair moving fast enough, and Priest gets the Drip Stick! Miz gets stuck in a corner, and gets SQUIRT SQUIRT! Miz finally gets his Drip Stick out but Priest snatches it to SQUIRT SQUIRT Miz again! And again! And then he dumps the bucket on him!! Chicago fires up as Miz’s rose pink suit is soaked! Will Priest make Johnny Drip Drip dry up after the break?

Damian Priest VS John Morrison w/ The Miz!

Raw returns and it’s happening! The bell rings and Miz is furiously ranting to commentary while Morrison circles with Priest. Morrison shoots in, gets Priest’s leg, and avoids the long arms to kick said leg. Priest ends up in a corner, Morrison SLAPS him, so Priest reels back to BOOT him down! Priest runs corner to corner to back elbow! And then suplex, but Morrison slips out to shove Priest at a corner., Priest goes up and out to GAMANGIRI! Priest climbs the ropes to leap and LEG DROP! Cover, TWO! Miz barks at Priest but Priest just smirks as he ROCKS Morrison! Priest whips Morrison, Morrison cartwheels over Priest’s back!

Morrison fakes Priest out with one kick to hit another! And get Priest with a KNEE on the way down! And then a mule kick! Cover, TWO! Morrison keeps on Priest with a ground ‘n’ pound  but Priest shoves him away. Morrison comes back to facelock and grind Priest down. Morrison then hooks Priest’s arm with legs, turns him sideways and has a unique submission hold. Morrison poses while grinding the shoulder, but Priest fights with knees! Priest is free, Miz is upset, and Morrison slowly gets up. Priest is in a corner, he back elbows Morrison away! Morrison comes back but Priest clubs his forearm shot down!

Priest KICKS and KICKS and ROLLING ELBOWS Morrison, then CLOBBERS him on the rebound! Fans fire up with Priest as he goes to the corner. Priest climbs, Miz has a Drip Stick and SQUIRT SQUIRT!! Morrison ROCKS Priest off the top with a forearm! Morrison gets Priest on the apron but Priest fights back. Morrison kicks low, fireman’s carries, but Priest resists by holding ropes. So Morrison uses that for a TUMBLING SAMOAN DROP?! Priest ends up in the drop zone, Morrison goes to the corner, STARSHIP- No! Priest yanks him down and choke grips! SOUTH OF- NO! Morrison wheelbarrows to a victory roll, TWO!!

Morrison keeps going, SHINING WIZARD! STANDING SHOOTING STAR! Cover again, TWO!! Priest is still in this and Morrison is furious. Morrison gets Priest up, but Priest ROCKS him with a right! Morrison rebounds to BOOT, then keeps going, only for Priest to bock Flying Chuck! Canadian rack, CLIFFHANGER DDT!! Priest isn’t done there, choke grip to SOUTH OF HEAVEN CHOKE SLAM!!! Cover, Priest wins!

Winner: Damian Priest, by pinfall

Miz is speechless! A rare sight, all thanks to the Archer of Infamy! But then SHEAMUS attacks! The Fella is furious from last week, he and Priest brawl it out! Sheamus knees, clubs, Morrison anchors Priest, but here comes RICOCHET! The King of Flight still wants to get even and he springboards to missile dropkick Sheamus down! Morrison gets a FLAPJACK from Priest! Morrison and Sheamus bail out, Priest and Ricochet fist bump. Will things escalate between the Celtic Warrior and his many enemies?

Damian Priest & Ricochet VS Sheamus & John Morrison w/ The Miz!

Holla holla holla! It seems Sonya Deville called upon the powers of Teddy Long for this one, and now the Archer of Infamy continues to fight! He and Sheamus brawl as this match is already underway! Priest ROCKS Sheamus, whips, but Sheamus reverses! Priest holds ropes, boots Sheamus away, and Ricochet tags in to springboard CROSSBODY! Ricochet fires off hands, Sheamus knees low and whips Ricochet, but Ricochet ducks to springboard CROSSBODY again! Ricochet keep smoving to PENALTY KICK Sheamus, then springboard TRIANGLE DROPKICK to Morrison! Ricochet fakes Miz out to LIONSAULT onto Sheamus! Cover, TWO!!

Ricochet keeps cool even after all that, and he runs at Sheamus in a corner. Ricochet RAMS into Sheamus and slips out to the apron. Morrison rushes him but Ricochet DECKS him! Miz is worried for Morrison, Sheamus BOOTS Ricochet! And then Miz suddenly starts making Drip Stick oil slicks? Morrison tags in, fetches Ricochet, and Miz moves aside so Morrison can SLIP ‘N’ SLIDE Ricochet into steps! Morrison puts Ricochet in the ring, covers, TWO! Morrison wraps Ricochet up in a chinlock, tags Sheamus back in, and they mug Ricochet with heavy hands. But Ricochet still fights with forearms! Sheamus knees low then hits an IRISH CURSE BACKBREAKER!

Sheamus sits Ricochet up to fire off clubbing forearms! Sheamus drags Ricochet up to CLUB him hard in the back. Ricochet throws back elbows over and over and fans fire up! Elbow after elbow, it never seems to end! Ricochet stops and fires up, but Sheamus CLUBS Ricochet again! Ricochet still ROCKS and ENZIGURIS Sheamus back! Morrison tags in, rushes Ricochet, but Ricochet switches super fast to GERMAN SUPLEX! Both men are down and fans rally up! Hot tag to Priest! Priest rallies on Morrison and Sheamus with big shots! BOOT for Morrison but Morrison mule kicks back. MOON- NO! Priest turns that into an Alabama lift, swinging BACKBREAKER!!

Priest gets Morrison up, ANOTHER SOUTH OF HEAVEN CHOKE SLAM!! Cover, Sheamus breaks it! Sheamus gets Priest up, but Priest ducks the clothesline to HEEL KICK Sheamus! Sheamus teeters on the ropes, Priest CLOBBERS him out of the ring! Ricochet adds on with the ARIHARA MOONSAULT! Fans are thunderous but Morrison catches Priest to a cradle! TWO, and Priest punches Morrison’s roundhouse away! Dragon sleeper, to THE RECKONING!! Cover, Priest & Ricochet win!

Winners: Damian Priest & Ricochet, by pinfall

Miz is about to explode over this! But Priest #HitTheLights on Johnny Drip Drip, and now heads straight for Sheamus and the US Championship. Will the Celtic Warrior need more than his face mask to protect his title reign now?

Lashley is pacing backstage.

Obviously, he is still fuming over what happened to MVP earlier tonight, and MVP is still clutching his gut from where Goldberg got him. But after the break, we finally get Lashley’s true response to Goldberg’s challenge!

Raw returns and Sarah interviews Lashley backstage. MVP tries to cut her off but his gut holds him back. Sarah continues to ask how Lashley is going to respond to Goldberg. Lashley says Goldberg brought his son to watch tonight, so Lashley hopes Goldberg brings his son to Las Vegas so he can watch Lashley ANNIHILATE Goldberg! Then that’s a yes?! We are getting Lashley VS Goldberg for the WWE World Championship?! We are!! Will this battle of gladiator and All Mighty be more like Godzilla VS King Kong?!

Matt Riddle VS Omos!

Bro… Riddle is ready to avenge his baby blue stallion, as well as the phenomenal beatdown the Raw Tag Team Champions gave him right after. Kevin Patrick interviews Omos at gorilla about said destruction of property, what can we expect in the ring? “Riddle’s scooter came first. Riddle’s spine comes next.” Menacing words from the mountain of a man, and he makes his entrance with his own theme song! Will Omos commemorate this special occasion by crushing Riddle’s body and spirit?

But Riddle doesn’t wait for a bell, he jumps on Omos’ back! Riddle wants a sleeper but Omos claws at him, and THRWOS him down! Then palms Riddle’s face and SHOVES him to a corner! The ref has Omos back off and Omos grins as he watches Riddle get up. Fans rally for “RID~DLE!” as the Original Bro gets back up. The bell rings, Omos rushes in but Riddle dodges! Riddle comes right back to forearm smash! Riddle keeps going, another forearm smash! And then another! Riddle keeps going, but Omos choke grips and SHOVES Riddle out of the ring! Omos goes out after him as a ring count begins, and Omos TOSSES Riddle into the timekeeper’s area!

Fans boo, Omos leaves Riddle for dead, and the count continues to 5 of 10! Riddle drags himself up at 7, flounders over at 8, and gets in at 9.9!! Only for Omos to get him up and HEADBUTT him! Riddle flops to the apron, Omos runs and BLASTS Riddle off it! Riddle hits the floor and is almost back at the timekeeper’s area! Omos glares at the ref, and the ref starts the ring count. Riddle drags himself back but we’re at 5 of 10 again. Riddle uses the announce desk to prop himself up at 7, staggers over at 8, drags himself up at 9 and Omos grabs him! Riddle shoulders in, slingshots up and over, and runs to FINAL FLASH! And again! But OMs is still up!

Riddle dodges Omos to FLYING FINAL FLASH! But Omos comes back to CLOBBER Riddle!! Fans boo as Omos looms over Riddle and talks trash. Omos dead lifts Riddle with one arm, then gets both hands on Riddle for the TWO HAND SLAM!! Cover, Omos wins!

Winner: Omos, by pinfall

Never before has such a valiant effort felt like such futility! The scooter is left alone, but will Riddle be able to even walk out of Chicago?

Alexa Bliss and Lilly are on the Playground.

Hello, friends, and welcome back! Did you know that Lilly has been thrilled over how the #LillyLution’s been going? But y’know, Lilly’s actually been influencing people for a long time. There was Jack the Ripper, Zodiac, and- Piper Niven attacks from behind!!? Eva smugly chuckles as she saunters into view. She picks Lilly up and says, “You are so much yuckier and uglier and gross in person.” Eva says this is EvaLution. She and Piper leave, but then Lilly stands up on her own?!

Karrion Kross VS Keith Lee!

The NXT Champion and the Limitless One battled it out last week, but this is far from done! Will Keith #FallAndPray all over again? Or will he finally cancel the apocalypse?

Raw returns and Keith makes his entrance. The bell rings and the two tie right up! They go around, end up on ropes, in a corner, and then more ropes. Fans chant for “NXT!” because Chicago remembers this feud. They finally stop in a corner, the ref counts, and Keith lets off slowly but cleanly. To then fire off body shots and forearms! Keith lets off to put Kross’ arms in the ropes, and GRIZ- NO! Kross remembers, too, and he blocks the double chop! Kross turns things around to stomp away! The ref counts, Kross stops at 4, but Keith clinches! Kross fights free with elbows but Keith gets him again. Kross keeps fighting, gets free again, and whips, only for Keith to reverse and run Kross over!

Keith runs Kross over again, then runs in at the corner. Kross dumps Keith out!? But Keith stays on the apron by holding the ropes! Kross runs in but Keith bumps him off buckles! Then Keith SLINGSHOT CROSSBODIES! Fans fire up while Kross sputters and gasps! Keith smirks as he watches Kross get up in the corner. Keith heads over but Kross BOOTS him! Kross fires off haymakers but Keith stays up. Kros reels Keith in for an EXPLODER into the corner! Kross scowls and goes outside, and he drags Keith out to join him. Kross brings Keith around to EXPLODER into the steel steps!! Fans go nuts and the ring count climbs as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns as Keith throws body shots. Kross knees low, Keith staggers to a corner, and Kross runs in to clothesline, back elbow, and DISCUS! Keith staggers and shoves Kross away, but Kross grins. Kross reels Keith in but Keith wrenches. Kross dodges the clothesline and runs to CLOBBER Keith! Cover, TWO! Kross grows frustrated but the fans continue to rally behind Keith. Keith crawls to a corner, Kross runs in, but Keith elbows him away! Kross grins again and runs back in, but into a boot! Kross staggers and scowls now, he runs in again but Keith sends him into buckles! Keith throws counter punches, big haymakers and back elbows, then a HEADBUTT! And a SPLASH!

Keith keeps Kross cornered to then GRIZZLY MAGNUM! Kross winces as he can’t breathe! Keith powers up and Chicago fires up with him, Keith runs to POUNCE Kross down! Fans are thunderous as Keith powers up more, and they lend him their energy! Keith gets Kross up but Kross spins out to reel Keith in. Keith blocks the suplex, even as Kross keeps trying, and Keith CLUBS him with an elbow! But Kross hammerlocks that arm to then ROCK Keith with a forearm to the back of his head! Kross says that’s it, and he puts on the KROSSJACKET!! Keith endures and has a hand in the gap! Keith is prying the hold apart and fans are thunderous!

Kross tries to tighten his grip but Keith blocks the other arm! Keith powers up to throw Kross off!! And then pop him up, for a SPIRIT BOMB!!! Cover, Keith wins!!

Winner: Keith Lee, by pinfall

Finally and emphatically, the Limitless One gets his win back from the apocalypse! Chicago is exhilarated to #BaskInHisGlory, is this a new beginning for Keith Lee?

Backstage interview with Rhea Ripley.

Kevin Patrick congratulates Rhea on her win over Nia, and asks if she’ll be watching tonight’s main event given it has her SummerSlam opponents. Rhea knows her match was brutal, but also knows it was nowhere near as brutal as a No Holds Barred match. Anything goes, from weapons to fighting dirty. So yeah, she will be watching. And again, she hopes Nikki beats Charlotte. But nothing changes the fact that at SummerSlam, in that Triple Threat, Rhea walks out champion. Just how badly will Nikki and Charlotte beat each other up in the main event?

WWE 24/7 Championship: Reggie VS ???

No longer “Reginald” and apparently no longer French (or rather, he never was French?), Reggie is ready to again defend this title in the most unusual place: the ring! Will Reggie keep hold of this title, even though he doesn’t know who’s challenging him?

Raw returns and now we learn his challenger is Akira Tozawa! The Stamina Monster was the one Reggie took the WWE 24/7 Championship from, will he be able to take it back? The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and Reggie shows off his moves. But then Tozawa shows off his moves? Is this becoming a dance-off? No, they tie up and Tozawa waistlocks. Reggie switches, Tozawa switches back but Reggie slips under and through the legs! Reggie ducks a kick, then goes Matrix! Reggie fakes Tozawa out into going Matrix, and when Tozawa stands back up, BOP! Tozawa ends up at the ropes, Reggie runs in but is dumped out, only to land on the apron!

Tozawa swings on Reggie but Reggie flips away! Fans marvel at Reggie’s agility! Reggie goes to the barrier and taunts Tozawa, but Tozawa runs out after him! Only to get barriers! Reggie plays cat ‘n’ mouse, and Tozawa clips rope with his face! Reggie goes back to the ring and makes sure Tozawa is okay. Tozawa throws a body shot! Tozawa whips but Reggie CORKSCREWS up and over him! Reggie shows punch and Tozawa shouts “STOP~!” Tozawa wants a breather, and then uses his NINJA POWER~! But it whiffs as Reggie back flips over him! And then handsprings to a back elbow! Direct hit and Reggie rolls right to his feet, to hit the 450 SEATED SENTON! Cover, Reggie wins!

Winner: Reggie, by pinfall (still WWE 24/7 Champion)

Cirque du Soleil has nothing on Reggie! He wins, keeps the belt, and rolls on! Will anyone ever capture this charismatic chameleon?

Backstage interview with Nikki A.S.H!

Kevin Patrick asks Nikki if it was wise to challenge Charlotte to a No Holds Barred match? Has she ever been in such a potentially dangerous match? Nope, not really. And while Nikki isn’t sure what to expect, Charlotte didn’t expect Nikki to do what she did earlier tonight. That’s part of being almost a superhero. You don’t know what to expect, but you just have to give it your absolute best. Charlotte beat Nikki, and Nikki asked for the rematch, because she has the confidence she can win! If she does, she’ll finally prove to the entire world that if you believe in yourself, you can be Almost a Super Hero!

The Raw Women’s Champion hears her music and heads out! Nikki may want the power of flight, but will she find she has the power of invulnerability?

No Holds Barred: Nikki A.S.H. VS Charlotte Flair!

Raw returns as The Queen makes her entrance. For some reason the belt is being raised? The bell rings and Charlotte tells Nikki she’s in over her head. The fans duel between “WOO~” and “Let’s Go Nikki!” as Nikki shakes her head. Charlotte rushes in, Nikki dodges, Nikki comes back to CROSSBODY and fast hands! Charlotte shoves her away but Nikki dodges again, only to run into a kitchen sink KNEE! Charlotte bounces Nikki off buckles, runs in but Nikki dodges! Nikki runs back in, into a backbreaker and BUCKLE SHOT! “THIS is your superhero?!” Charlotte is still upset over that as she throws Nikki out of the ring.

“You think you can just cash in on me?! No more cashing in on me!!” Charlotte tears the announce desk apart and commentary gives her space. Charlotte throws a monitor! It misses, but she grabs another one! Charlotte throws it down in a huff, and Nikki fires off forearms! Charlotte DECKS Nikki then hammers away on her! Fans want tables, so Charlotte brings one out! And she stands it up against the apron, BOOTS Nikki down, then gets Nikki up for a scoop. Nikki slips off and POSTS Charlotte first! Nikki hurries after Charlotte to fire off forearms but Charlotte DECKS her again! Charlotte CLUBS and pushes Nikki around, then gets her up just to slap her down!

Rhea is watching, just as she said she’d be, as Charlotte talks more trash to Nikki. “You think you’re a champion, dressed like that?!” Charlotte stomps Nikki, kicks her around, then CHOPS Nikki. Nikki KICKS back, Charlotte CHOPS, repeat, but then Charlotte BOOTS Nikki down! Charlotte gets Nikki back up to EXPLODER! Nikki ends up all the way back at the other corner! Charlotte glares, aims, and runs at Nikki, and SPEARS her through the timekeeper’s barriers!! Charlotte is rabid and so are the fans as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns once more and Charlotte RAMS Nikki into a corner! And then RAMS her shoulder in, then CHOPS Nikki down! The table has moved into the ring, too. Charlotte puts Nikki up top on the corner, she climbs up and fires off forearms, but Nikki hits back! They brawl, Nikki sends Charlotte down, and then leaps! But the crossbody FLOPS! Charlotte runs to BOOT Nikki down! And then covers, but lets up!? Charlotte wants to make Nikki suffer, even more than she already has! Charlotte gets Nikki up, shoves her and BOOTS her down again! Cover, but again Charlotte lets Nikki off! The Queen has reached a new level of sadism!

Charlotte goes outside the ring, looks underneath, and brings out chairs! Charlotte has one as she gets on the apron, but Nikki WRECKS her with a dropkick into the chair! Nikki fires up as Charlotte staggers up, and Nikki reels her in for a TORNADO DDT to the floor! Rhea likes that, and likes it as Nikki CLUBS away on Charlotte’s back! But Charlotte CHOPS back, and CHOPS again! And CHOPS! Nikki KICKS, Charlotte forearms, repeat, Charlotte tosses Nikki over the barriers, into the front row of fans! Charlotte soaks up all the heat as she continues to say no one will ever cash in on her again.

But Nikki’s on the barrier! Nikki LEAPS, but Charlotte catches her! And POEWRBOMBS her through the announce desk! Chicago goes nuts as they finally get a table spot! The ref checks on Nikki and has Charlotte stay back. Charlotte keeps muttering to herself that she’s the champion and no one will ever cash-in on her again. Charlotte gets Nikki up and says, “There are no easy ways in this business!” Nikki is here because of Charlotte! Charlotte drags Nikki’s limp body back to the ring, hauls her up and in, then takes her time going up the steps. Charlotte takes her time dragging Nikki to center, and stands on her for a cocky cover. TWO?!?!

Charlotte is stunned! How is Nikki still in this?! Charlotte is enraged and she KICKS Nikki in the side! Nikki is on the brink of tears, but she also grits her teeth and pushes herself up off the mat. Charlotte aims, vows this will end it, and runs in, but Nikki moves! Charlotte Spears herself THROUGH THE TABLE!! Nikki crawls, covers, TWO!?!? Now Charlotte stuns Nikki! But fans know “This is Awesome!” as Nikki still has a chance! Nikki scowls at Charlotte, gets her up through the ropes, and hits a DRAPING SWINGING NECKBREAKER!!! Cover, Nikki wins!!

Winner: Nikki A.S.H, by pinfall

The return of Nikki Cross’ Anarchy is what helped this Almost Super Hero finally take down The Queen! Chicago celebrates with the champion, and it is rightfully deserved! But after such an epic battle, is it even possible to repeat this at SummerSlam?!

My Thoughts:

This episode was truly an emotional roller coaster. Chicago is always a rowdy crowd, but this was without a doubt the rowdiest they’ve been in a looong time. A bit fickle in a way, too. They’d “CM Punk!” segments that were honestly really good, and then snap back to actually caring when and only when things crossed into awesome. But the crowd is the crowd, not the show. In the show, there was a hilarious technical glitch where the opening B-roll didn’t have visuals, and then we got a clunky second part to Goldberg challenging Lashley.

Well, no, MVP and Lashley were smooth, Goldberg was clunky. I think he lost his train of thought and just copied a lot of what MVP said about gladiators and coliseums and all that. Also, no one is who they used to be at 105! What a dumb line… I have said I’m not behind Lashley VS Goldberg happening, and this made me less so. Goldberg stumbles in his promo, then Lashley & MVP honestly do pull a punk move trying to get in the face of Gage, Son of Goldberg. If you’re not afraid of the old part-timer, why resort to the lowest level of bullying? This is all just the worst way to do this kind of story, regardless of when and where in the world it happened.

I don’t want to mix messages, but there’s a lot to unpack with McIntyre’s segment. On one hand, much love to McIntyre for immortalizing the memory of his mom through the sword. They’ve been saying it’s a family heirloom, and now it is, in a way. But to that other hand, Mahal should’ve just attacked at the bell so that they don’t even bother with the Handicap Match and try to have their 3v1 beatdown right away. McIntyre still fights them off with the sword and scares them out of town, what even changes in terms of the story?

In hindsight, there’s morbid irony in Nia saying we’d see something more shocking than someone using a sword. Nia VS Rhea was a really good match, but whoa at the blood that we unintentionally got. Nia kept going so I suppose that means it wasn’t serious. Hard to say if the roll-up was a plan B finish or the actual plan, since Shayna and Nia had their argument and apparent break-up and Rhea still got her Riptide in, but it all worked out in its own way. The Shay-Nia break-up was coming, Rhea needed to get back to that brutality as she had in NXT, all good stuff. Well, maybe not Rhea’s interview promo afterward. It was recycled material, again, as almost all of Rhea’s Raw promos have been.

We got a really good match and really good story progress in the rematch of Mansoor & Ali VS Mace & T-Bar with that masterfully subtle moment where Ali gets Mansoor away before taking the double choke slam. But… it also exposes that the tag division is scarce right now. I would’ve liked this week to be where Mansoor & Ali face some other team, Ali gets the pin, but only after using a Heelish tactic. Mansoor could realize what happened, be upset, there’s an argument promo, tension, and then they come into the match we got tonight on edge. I think that pacing would’ve given Ali’s sacrifice move more stain power.

I know, I know, I’m starting to sound redundant, but I did start by saying it was a roller coaster of a night. But you have to agree we got sent through a loop with the EvaLution story. First it’s like, “Oooh, Piper’s getting mad! Eva disrespected her, disrespected Natalya, and then disrespected Piper again after losing to Tamina when it was Eva’s fault!” But then, we’re supposed to accept that Piper sides with Eva again just because Alexa was mocking Eva? No! Piper should agree with Alexa, and ditch Eva for all the constant disrespect! I know I would. Vince and his guys just don’t know how to write humans anymore, I swear…

But then, the saving grace of tonight, or maybe graces. Firstly, everything with Priest, Morrison, Miz, and eventually Ricochet and Sheamus, was awesome! Well, okay, MizTV was just “really good” because promos fighting with “CM PUNK!” chants is just… Anyway, Priest VS Morrison 1v1 was badass and Priest & Ricochet VS Sheamus & Morrison was super badass, and I loved that they brought out some never-before-seen moves! Priest is rolling into his US Championship match, I hope this means Ricochet and Morrison have some kind of 1v1 on the side, every single one of these guys are incredible.

Reggie VS Tozawa was great, too! Despite the promo where Reggie explains he was never really French being here and not on SmackDown (more of a communication issue within WWE itself), it doesn’t change that he can still move like he’s almost a superhero. I could not keep up in way where I could describe the moves properly, Reggie is making the WWE 24/7 Championship must-see on his abilities alone. Kinda makes me feel bad that I expect Otis to get this belt on SmackDown.

And of course, everything with Charlotte and Nikki! Charlotte’s promo was good, and yes it droned on, but that’s because she was buying time for Nikki to get to a spot where she could make that ambush possible. And there was confusion caused between a graphic again saying “Championship Contender’s Match” for no reason when Charlotte has a spot in the Triple Threat, and then the ref raises the belt like this was a championship match, all signs that Vince’s newest obsession is poisoning his booking.

But the match itself could not have been any better! There were some obvious things like Charlotte sending herself through the table, but Nikki looked so tough and so aggressive that of course the fans got behind her. And best of all, a clean, definitive win for Nikki with the return of her actual finisher, that’s how you top it off. I would really hope that this all means Nikki retains in the Triple Threat and gets to do as she promised last week in transforming and leading the Raw Women’s Division into the future.

My Score: 8.3/10