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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (1/21/22)

Acknowledge the history made!

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SmackDown 2022

The Tribal Chief is the new Universal Championship standard!

SmackDown, acknowledge that Roman Reigns is the new longest reigning WWE Universal Champion as the Bloodline celebrates!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Kofi Kingston VS “Mad Cap” Moss w/ “Happy” Corbin; Kofi wins.
  • Aliyah VS Natalya; Aliyah wins, by disqualification.
  • Los Lotharios VS The Viking Raiders; The Viking Raiders win.
  • SmackDown Women’s Championship Contender’s Match: Charlotte Flair VS Naomi; Charlotte wins and denies Naomi a title match.
  • Sheamus w/ Ridge Holland VS Ricochet; Sheamus wins.
  • Seth Rollins & Kevin Owens VS The Usos; Rollins & Kevin win, by disqualification, and The Usos are banned from ringside during the Royal Rumble’s Universal Championship match.

PLAY BY PLAY

The Usos are in the ring to start off SmackDown!

Jey tells Nashville, “The Bloodline is now in your city!” Jimmy says they’re here for one reason and one reason only! They’re celebrating the longest reigning Universal Champion EVER! At 508 days… That’s 508 consecutive days! There are a few big names who have been Universal Champion, but none held the belt as long as this. Not Kevin Owens, not Seth Freakin’ Rollins, not Brock Lesnar! But there is one. He is the Head of the Table, he is the Tribal Chief, he is the longest reigning Universal Champion in WWE history! Their cousin, ROMAN! REEEIGNS! And here comes Roman! He holds up the belt for one round of pyro on stage, then the second round in the ring.

Jimmy gets Roman a mic, and Roman says, “Nashville! Acknowledge me.” Jimmy says, “Ladies and gentlemen, let’s witness the highlights of the most dominant, decorated WWE champion, Roman Reigns.” The video starts by noting August 30th, 2020, Roman Reigns returned to action and took the title from Braun Strowman. From there, he defeated Kevin Owens, Daniel Bryan, Edge, Cesaro, Rey Mysterio, Finn Balor, Shinsuke Nakamura, and even John Cena, Brock Lesnar, and Big E. “ACKNOWLEDGE ME!” Back to present, Roman has a big smile on his face while the Usos applaud. That was a good video!

But then SETH ROLLINS appears! “Oooooh, what kind of party would it be without Seth Freakin’ Rollins~?” Hell of a video, and congratulations to the longest reigning Universal Champion of all time. They should celebrate, because that reign will end very, very shortly. But also, celebrate the fact that Roman made an honest man outta Rollins. Last week, Rollins came out, told Roman that he’s not responsible for any of his own success, and Rollins meant that in a meta way. Roman is the chosen one, catered to, but oh, Roman took it so literally. In fact, Roman sent his cousins to Raw to do the dirty work for him. If Roman had a message to send, he could just text.

But since we’re here celebrating, what they should be celebrating is the longest reigning SmackDown Tag Team Champions in history, The Usos! They in truth, and Roman knows it, too, are the cornerstones of the Bloodline. They’re the ones who make everything Roman do possible. They hold Roman up now, just like Rollins and Mox did in the Shield! So let’s have a celebration for the Usos! “UCE! SO! UCE! SO!” Rollins laughs and says it is fun to say that. Roman tells “little brother” Rollins that he makes all the same excuses. Did Cena write that stuff for Rollins? Roman assures Rollins that their match at the Rumble will be 1v1. Rollins has Roman’s word.

Oh, is he gonna add a “Believe that” next? Once upon a time, Roman’s word was as good as gold, but Rollins doesn’t believe him. So Roman should put his money where his mouth is. Rollins can get a partner, beat the Usos, and then bar them from ringside at the Rumble! Rollins even adds a You Can’t See Me. Roman mulls it over, but the Usos say, “Hell yeah! Challenge accepted, Uce!” Then we have a main event! Rollins loves it! Jey says Rollins is trippin’. Ain’t nobody crazy enough to team with Rollins in the first place, so they’re good. Yes, not too many people like Rollins. But uh… Here’s KEVIN OWENS! The Prizefighter and Rollins hug, Kevin shouts HE likes Rollins!

Roman has them cut the “stupid music.” Nothing is final until the Tribal Chief says so! Rollins is a betting man, huh? Then let’s raise the stakes. When Rollins & Kevin lose tonight, that means Rollins loses his match at the Rumble. And Roman can go on vacation until WrestleMania! Deal? Rollins thinks, and says, “You’re on!” What a huge match on the way to the Royal Rumble! Will the Usos clear Roman’s schedule for him? Or will Roman have no choice but to do things all by himself?

 

Kofi Kingston VS “Mad Cap” Moss w/ “Happy” Corbin!

The Right Hand of the King will not let it stand that the literal fool of SmackDown got the last laugh last week. Before the match, Corbin says they’ve been on a roll! First, they took out Drew McIntyre. Then Moss steamrolled Sir Kofi! As incredible as Kofi is, without King Woods, the Hand of the King is just a disembodied hand. If Kofi started a Garth Brooks cover band, what would he sing? Friends in NO places! But Kofi makes his entrance, and surprise! Big E is here! Even more Raw stars are showing up on SmackDown! Will the Powerhouse of Positivity keep Corbin from helping his hyena sidekick?

The bell rings, Kofi and Moss circle. Kofi dodges Moss to waistlock, headlock, but Moss powers out. Moss runs Kofi over with a shoulder and then gives two thumbs up. Big E coaches Kofi but Moss CLUBS Kofi to the corner. Moss whips Kofi corner to corner, but Kofi goes up to missile dropkick! And LEAPING LARIAT! Fans fire up as Kofi runs, for the NEW~ DAY~ Boom Drop! Big E says to make this quick work, and Kofi claps it up. Moss slowly gets up but Corbin distracts. Moss CLOBBERS Kofi from behind! Moss throws haymakers, CLUBS Kofi down, then throws Kofi out of the ring. Moss goes out and Corbin suggests to use the steps.

Moss gets Kofi up, whips him over, but Kofi leaps over the steps to jump back and CLOBBER Moss! And then Big E sends Corbin into the steps! The New Day is all fired up as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and Moss has a chinlock. Kofi fights up and hits a JAWBREAKER! Kofi runs, Moss gets him up for a SPINEBUSTER! Corbin is fired up and Moss taunts Kofi. Moss also taunts Big E, then he stomps away on Kofi in a corner! The ref counts, Moss lets off and runs in, but is sent into buckles! Moss staggers up, Kofi rallies with DOUBLE CHOPS! And a dropkick! Kofi runs, but Moss ducks the lariat to kick low. Moss whips Kofi to a corner, Kofi goes up and up and RANAS Moss to another corner! Then STOMPS Moss down! Cover, TWO! Moss survives but Kofi drags him up to whip. Moss reveres, Kofi leaps, but into a POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO!

Moss snarls, Corbin tells him to keep on Kofi. Moss says this is it, and he reels Kofi in. Kofi slips out of the gut wrench, dodges to TROUBLE IN PARADISE outta nowhere!! Cover, Kofi wins!

Winner: Kofi Kingston, by pinfall

Corbin gets in the ring, but Big E gets in, too. Big E dares Corbin to do something, but Corbin bails back out. Moss flounders up, Big E says this is for Corbin. Scoop and BIG ENDING! The New Day owns Corbin’s crony, will they own the Royal Rumble?

 

Aliyah VS Natalya!

Last time these two faced off, it lasted only 3.17 seconds because the Queen of Harts overestimated herself. Will Natty take Aliyah more seriously and redeem herself? Or will Aliyah still win, even if it takes longer than the blink of an eye?

SmackDown returns and Natty makes her entrance. Nashville’s own Summer Rae is in the crowd and is given a shoutout by the ring announcer. The bell rings, Natty kicks Aliyah then pulls her hair. Aliyah rolls Natty up, ONE! Natty bumps Aliyah off buckles, and stomps her. Natty drags Aliyah out to a snap suplex! Cover, ONE! Natty says Aliyah is gonna learn for disrespecting her, but Aliyah gets a cradle! TWO, and Natty LARIATS Aliyah down! Cover, ONE! Natty drags Aliyah up, whips, but Aliyah reverses. Aliyah runs in but Natty puts her on the apron. Aliyah throws a forearm, and hits a handspring huricanrana! But Natty’s right up, for a DISCUS! Cover, TWO!

Natty is frustrated with Aliyah and drags her up to reel her in. Natty gets a Canadian rack and uses gravity to stretch Aliyah out. Aliyah fights up, sunset flips, TWO! Natty whips Aliyah hard into ropes, then stomps her down! The ref counts, Natty lets off at 4, and she stomps Aliyah in the corner. The ref counts, Natty doesn’t let off, that’s a disqualification!

Winner: Aliyah, by disqualification

Aliyah wins again, but Natty only gets angrier! Natty fires off hands on Aliyah, and even dribbles Aliyah off the mat! But here comes XIA LI! The Protector returns to defend Aliyah from the bully, Natalya! Xia gets in the ring, stares Natty down, and then blocks Natty’s punch! Xia sobats Natty out of the ring, then dares her to try again. Natty leaves it at this, but will Xia make sure Natty learns not to cross the line?

 

Los Lotharios VS The Viking Raiders!

Angel Garza & Humberto Carrillo may not have won the #1 contenders Fatal 4 Way, but they can definitely be a speed bump in the road. Will Erik & Ivar stumble against these two studs? Or will they run right through the heartthrobs on their way to the Usos?

SmackDown returns as the Viking Raiders make their entrance. Nashville is ready for the raid, and the teams sort out. Humberto starts against Ivar and they circle. Humberto knees low, CLUBS Ivar, then clamps onto an arm. Ivar powers Humberto back, tags in Erik, and whip. Humberto dodges Ivar but Erik scoops him for a SLAM! Then Erik scoops and SLAMS Ivar onto Humberto! Erik roars, drags Humberto up to whip to ropes, then scoops. Humberto slips out, Garza tags in, and Humberto feeds Erik to Garza’s GAMANGIRI! Garza fires off hands, knees Erik at the ropes, and off come the pants!

Garza throws the pants at Erik, has him against ropes, and tags Carrillo. Garza holds Erik out, they LEAP FROG ATTACK Erik down! Then double basement dropkick! Cover, TWO! Humberto rains down fists, then STANDING MOONSAULTS but flops! Erik KNEES Humberto down, hot tags to Garza and Ivar! The War Beard rallies on Garza, then hits a BASEMENT SPLASH! Humberto runs in, into a HEEL KICK! Ivar runs at Garza, but Garza dodges. He turns seated senton into POWERBOMB! High stack, TWO! Tag to Humberto, but Erik sneaks a tag in! Los Lotharios double whip Ivar, but he cartwheels through the double clothesline!

The Viking Raiders scoop a Lothario each, stack them on Erik, POWERBOMB POWERSLAM COMBO! Then they get Humberto up, THOR’S HAMMER!! Cover, The Viking Raiders win!

Winners: The Viking Raiders, by pinfall

Raid successful! But the ultimate challenge will be going after the gold! Will Erik & Ivar get the titles off the longest reigning SmackDown Tag Team Champions?

 

SmackDown Women’s Championship Contender’s Match: Charlotte Flair VS Naomi!

Adam Pearce stepped in to get past Sonya Deville’s bias, and now Naomi gets another chance! Will Nashville #FeelTheGlow now that things are fair and square against Flair?

SmackDown returns and Charlotte makes her entrance. But then Sonya appears outta nowhere and gets in the ring to talk with the ref. She wants to be the special guest referee?! Sonya throws off the jacket and the ref hands over his shirt. Naomi says Sonya can’t do this, but Sonya says she can. The bell rings, Naomi glares at Sonya, and then Charlotte ROCKS Naomi with a forearm! Fans boo but Charlotte stomps away! Sonya doesn’t count as a ref should, and Charlotte dribbles Naomi off the mat! Charlotte mocks the fans, drags Naomi into a headscissor necklock, and she RAMS Naomi into the mat again and again.

Charlotte squeezes tight, Sonya asks if Charlotte is okay, and she says yes. Charlotte TOSSES Naomi, and says this is too easy. She brings Naomi up to CHOP her in the corner. And CHOP! But Naomi kicks, Charlotte blocks, Naomi ENZIGURIS! And then RANA- NO! Charlotte blocks to a BOSTON CRAB! Naomi endures, crawls, Sonya stands in her way of the ropes! But Naomi fights through to kick Charlotte into Sonya! REAR VIEW!! Cover, but Sonya ignores it! Naomi would’ve won twice over by now! Naomi shouts at Sonya but then Charlotte CHOP BLOCKS the leg! FIGURE FOUR! Sonya just rings the bell?!?

Winner: Charlotte Flair, by referee stoppage

And then Charlotte bridges to a FIGURE EIGHT! Charlotte makes Naomi suffer a little longer, and then Sonya mocks Naomi, “How does it feel to be a big loser?” What does Naomi have to do to get Sonya to stop being a tyrant?

 

Backstage interview with Kevin Owens & Seth Rollins.

Kevin and Seth are in a good mood, even with tonight’s high stakes tag match. Why is Rollins willing to bet his Universal Championship opportunity? Kevin asks if he can take this one. Yeah, have at it. Kevin tells Kayla that if it wasn’t for the Usos, Kevin would be the longest reigning Universal Champion of all time, but they kept that from happening. So the thought of them doing that to his friend, Seth Rollins, it tears Kevin up inside. Rollins says Kevin has become an honest man! And Rollins says that the stakes may be huge, but the risk is worth the reward. Can Rollins beat Roman with the Usos by his side? Maybe.

But 1v1, well, “Death, taxes and Seth Freakin’ Rollins beats Roman Reigns every single time!” HAHAHA! Kevin even has a shirt that says that. The friends head out, but will it be a certainty that they make Roman VS Rollins truly 1v1?

 

Sami Zayn heads to the ring!

The Great Liberator continues to try and out Jackass the Jackass original, Johnny Knoxville, and we’ll see how he plans to do that, after the break.

SmackDown returns and it’s time for an all-new #InZayn! Sami has a collection of items on a table and he welcomes us to “self defense.” Many may not know this about Knoxville, but before he got famous doing Jackass, he got noticed for testing self-defense weapons on himself. So Sami is going to do the same here tonight! He has some of the most dangerous self-defense weapons on the market, and some not on the market, and will use them on himself! Anything Knoxville can do, Sami can do better! Starting with a cattle prod! The max setting could put down a rhino! So just going with level one, that’s quite a lot of voltage already.

Sami aims at himself, and here goes. One, two, three. ZAP! Sami hobbles around and tries to laugh off the pain. Not great, that wasn’t fun. Sami says it’s no big deal, really. Let’s go to level two! Knoxville was incapacitated for about 15 minutes, but let’s see how a real man handles it. Sami says he’ll even up the ante by putting it to his chest! Everyone, shut up! This is dangerous. One, two, three. ZAP! Sami falls right over into the ropes! Why does it hurt so much!? Sami gets up, but here comes Knoxville! So, Sami, you are so concerned about Knoxville making a mockery of his profession, yet Sami’s doing the same to Knoxville’s? Something seems off here…

Fans rally behind Knoxville and Sami says this is HIS show! Nothing is off! Knoxville snatches the cattle prod, and says this is a legit model. But it’s literally off. Sami never turned it on! Here, Knoxville will fix that. ZAP! And Sami falls right down! Yeah, that’s not good. Knoxville “apologizes” and wants to help Sami up. Sami asks why Knoxville did that, but Knoxville says, “See you at the Rumble.” And then Knoxville TOSSES Sami up and out! Will Sami stop trying to go InZayn and worry more about just wrestling the Rumble?

 

Adam Pearce talks with Eric Bischoff backstage.

Eric says a pessimist complains about the wind, while an optimist expects the winds to change. A true leader adjusts the sails. Pearce likes that. But in walks Sonya. Perfect timing. Pearce properly introduces them, and hopes Sonya knows of Eric’s history as a decision maker here in the WWE. Of course, and it’s a pleasure to meet him. She didn’t know he was coming, though. Well, Sonya, what you did out there in the ring was completely over the line. Pearce doesn’t know what this issue with Naomi is, but it needs to stop. It is affecting Sonya’s ability to lead. Pearce says  he’ll bring it to upper management that Sonya and Naomi should have a match, next week.

Sonya does her best not to explode, and says great. Let her know what they say. Sonya walks back out, and Eric says that was great leadership. Pearce thanks Eric for that, but will Naomi be the one who’s really thankful once she gets her hands on Sonya?

 

Sheamus w/ Ridge Holland VS Ricochet!

The Fella has his protégé back by his side! Will the damage to the nose be avenged? Or will the One and Only just give Sheamus some of the same?

SmackDown returns and Ricochet makes his entrance. The bell rings, Sheamus kicks low and fires off on Ricochet! Sheamus bumps Ricochet off buckles, fires more forearms, and Ridge says to unleash on Ricochet for the nose! Sheamus whips, Ricochet goes up and over then runs to KICK and CHOP and forearm! Ricochet runs, but into a scoop and BACKBREAKER! Sheamus snarls, drags Ricochet and drives elbows into his shoulders. Sheamus knees Ricochet in the back then wraps on a chinlock. Sheamus thrashes Ricochet, Ricochet fights with fists and body shots to hit a JAWBREAKER!

Ricochet runs, Sheamus scoops but Ricochet slips free to tiger wall kick! And dropkick! Sheamus staggers, Ricochet runs, but into an IRISH CURSE BACKBREAKER! Ridge loves it and Sheamus soaks up the heat. Ricochet goes to the apron, Sheamus drags him up to ROCK him with a forearm. Sheamus gives Ricochet Beats of the Bodhrain! Sheamus stops at 9 to go out to the apron and CLOBBER Ricochet back into the ring! Sheamus drags Ricochet up in a motorcycle stretch but Ricochet kangaroo kicks free! Ricochet dodges the boot and Sheamus ends up on the apron! Ricochet triangle jump dropkicks Sheamus down!

Ricochet builds speed, and DIVES into a knee! Sheamus takes Ricochet outta the air, then puts him in the ring. Sheamus runs in and BROGUES! Cover, Sheamus wins!

Winner: Sheamus, by pinfall

Ridge celebrates with The Celtic Warrior as he rolls towards the Rumble! Will Sheamus win the Rumble once again to head back to WrestleMania’s main event?

 

Shinsuke Nakamura and Rick Boogs rock out backstage.

Wait, is that Double J? Jeff Jarrett is here! Double J, E, double F, J, A, double R, E, double T! HAHA~! That was good, guys. But Jeff has to say, Boogs plays a mighty fine guitar. What’s his name? Double J wants to know his name? He’s Rick… BOOGS! Well, can he spell it? R I C K- Well, anyway, will we get a duet of Boogs and Jarrett some day?

 

Seth Rollins & Kevin Owens VS The Usos!

The Visionary and Prizefighter want to keep Jimmy & Jey from helping out the Tribal Chief at the Royal Rumble, but Roman wants a vacation. Will the Bloodline ironically prove Rollins right by doing their cousin’s dirty work? Or will Seth & Kevin be the ones that level the playing field against the Head of the Table?

Roman is watching from his private room as Rollins and Kevin go to the ring. This high stakes main event tag match determines Rollins’ fate, after the break.

SmackDown returns and Rollins starts against Jimmy. Rollins wants Jimmy to acknowledge the fans singing Rollins’ theme. Then Rollins rolls Jimmy up, TWO! Backslide, ONE! Rollins Oklahoma Rolls, ONE! Jimmy bails out and Rollins is feeling good. Rollins gives Jimmy time to come back, Jey tags in. Fans want tables already but Jey kicks Rollins low. Jey headlocks to the takeover but Rollins rolls it to a cover, ONE! Another, ONE! A third, TWO! Jey mule kicks hard, then he RAMS Rollins into the corner! Tag to Jimmy, the Usos mug Rollins, and Roman is pleased. Tag back to Jey, they stomp away on Rollins, and then tag back to Jimmy.

The stomping continues, Jimmy fires up but fans are torn. Jimmy drags Rollins up but Rollins powers him to the other corner! Rollins fires off, tags Kevin, and they stomp away on Jimmy in return! Tag back to Rollins, he stomps Jimmy more, then lets off as the ref counts. Kevin gets up to fire up the fans, and Rollins wrenches to kick Jimmy low. Rollins scoops and SLAMS Jimmy, then goes to a corner. Rollins climbs, but Jey distracts the ref. Jimmy trips Rollins up! Kevin protests but Jimmy bumps Rollins off buckles. Tag to Jey, Jimmy ROCKS Rollins with an uppercut, then holds Rollins still for Jey’s forearm smash!

Jey CLUBS Rollins down, stomps Rollins, and tags Jimmy. The Usos mug Rollins, Jimmy bumps Rollins off buckles, then stomps him down. Fans are torn as Jimmy holds up the finger. “UCE! SO!” Jimmy runs, but Rollins LARIATS him down! Fans fire up as both men are down, hot tag to Kevin! Kevin dodges Jimmy and fires off forearms and CHOPS! Kevin whips, CLOBBERS Jimmy with an elbow and adds a SENTON! Kevin DECKS Jey, shouts “SUCK IT!” and runs corner to corner and CANNONBALL into Jimmy! Then Kevin goes up top, only for Jey to rush over. Kevin kicks Jey away, SWANTONS onto Jimmy’s knees!

SUPERKICK! Tag to Jey, and he finds Kevin on the outside to SUPERKICK again! The Usos stand tall as SmackDown goes to break!

SmackDown returns again and both Kevin and Jimmy are down. They crawl for their corners, hot tag to Jey and he goes past Kevin to DECK Rollins! Jey drags Kevin away, the ref keeps Rollins from getting in, and Jey stomps away on Kevin! Roman nods as he watches, but Kevin CHOPS back. Kevin DECKS Jimmy, CHOPS Jey, but Jey mule kicks! Kevin drops into the corner, Jimmy holds him down and Jey stomps. Tag, and Jimmy stomps Kevin down now. Jimmy rains down fists, the ref counts, Jimmy lets off at 4. Fans rally, Jimmy drags Kevin up but Kevin blocks the kick, and ducks the Dragon Whip to ENZIGURI!

Both men are down again, Kevin crawls, hot tags to Jey and Rollins! Rollins rallies on Jey, whips but Jey reverses, only to get a SLINGBLADE! And then a fireman’s carry, to a GUT BUSTER! Rollins clotheslines Jey out of the ring! Jimmy runs in but Rollins sends him out, too! Rollins builds speed and DIVES! He takes out both Usos at once! Nashville fires up as Rollins puts Jey back in. Rollins aims from the apron, springboards in, FLYING KNEE! Cover, TWO! Jey survives but Rollins drags Jey back up to suplex. Jey slips out, waistlocks, but Rollins switches. Jey switches back, back suplexes to a NECKBREAKER! Cover, TWO!

Jey is frustrated, but he gets up and aims from a corner. SUPER- NO! Rollins blocks to kick and reel Jey in! Jey fights the bomb, Jimmy tags in! Rollins runs into an ALLEY-UCE! Cover, TWO!! Rollins survives and the Usos can’t believe it! Fans rally up, Jimmy decks Kevin off the apron to take away a tag! Jimmy goes up top, Rollins stands but he gets under Jimmy! Kevin tags in, ROLLING ELBOW from Rollins! Jey gets in, but gets a PELE! Kevin POP-UP POWERBOMBS Jimmy! Cover, TWO!! But Kevin hurries to put Jimmy in a drop zone! Kevin goes back up top, fans fire up, but Jimmy ROCKS him with an uppercut!

Jimmy GAMANGIRIS Kevin, then climbs up after him. Kevin holds ropes, and turns things around, SUPER FISHERMAN BUSTER! Kevin crawls to the cover, Jey breaks it! Fans are thunderous as Rollins tags back in! Forearm smash for Jey, then a flurry of fists and feet for Jimmy! Jey SUPERKICKS Rollins! Kevin kicks but no stunner! Kevin blocks Jey’s superkick to STUNNER anyway! Jimmy SUPERKICKS Kevin! Rollins SUPERKICKS Jimmy! ROLLING ELBOW, then the DREAM SMASHER! Fans are thunderous and singing Rollins’ theme as he aims at Jimmy, CURB STOMP!! But Roman runs in to SUPERMAN PUNCH!!

Winners: Seth Rollins & Kevin Owens, by disqualification (The Usos are banned from ringside)

Rollins was going to win, so Roman beat him to it! The Usos are still out of the equation, and the Architect is under the skin of the Tribal Chief! Will Rollins take advantage of Roman’s frustration and take away the Universal Championship?


My Thoughts:

A pretty good episode of SmackDown, though sadly a lot of it shares the same formula as Raw. The matches weren’t as long as they could’ve or should’ve been, and the promos took priority. I will say, stars from Raw showing up was quite a surprise. Perhaps a ratings grab play, maybe even an indicator that the rosters are combining into one again. But in Xavier Woods’ absence, it’s great that Big E is here to support Kofi. Kofi gets redemption in the rematch with Moss, and turns out we’re getting a tag match, New Day VS Corbin & Moss. That will be a really good match for the go-home as everyone’s going into the Rumble.

Jarrett showing up was random but they could be planting seeds for him and Boogs having something for WrestleMania. Bischoff showing up was cool, and I like that Pearce is putting Sonya in her place. Sonya again screws over Naomi but now she and Naomi are going to have a match. I just hope it lasts longer than five minutes, given how WWE is doing things these days. Aliyah gets another win because Natty loses her cool, but I appreciate that WWE remembered they were building to something with Natty and Xia. Viking Raiders get a quick win over Los Lotharios to stay warm for the SmackDown Tag Team Championship match, but it doesn’t do much to make me think they’re winning the titles.

Sheamus getting payback on Ricochet for Ridge was rather anticlimactic. It was too short of a match for what we know those two can do. And can’t Ridge get payback for himself? Why is it Boogs gets the push while partnered with Nakamura but Ridge is just around while he’s partnered with Sheamus? They should basically be parallels. And when is Sami getting his title shot? I get Sami wasn’t going to really zap himself with the cattle prod, but they used such a corny zap sound. Even when Knoxville appeared to “really” zap Sami, it was a bad sound effect. Even though Sami’s the Heel, I hope he gets to eliminate Knoxville to get that heat, and then Nakamura eliminates Sami as instant karma.

But as has been the case for SmackDown these last 508 days, the best stuff was with the Bloodline. That really was a well made video to highlight Roman’s reign, and the interplay between Roman and the Usos was great stuff. Rollins and Kevin were great as always, too, and their tag match was a great match. I should’ve figured Roman would throw the match out of frustration. The Usos won’t be part of the main event, so unless someone from Raw who doesn’t like Rollins costs him, this could be the best opportunity to take that title of Roman before 600+ days.

My Score: 8.1/10


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Mitchell’s ROH Death Before Dishonor Results & Report! (7/26/24)

YEEHAW!

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The word of the day is, “Gold!”

ROH brings Death Before Dishonor to Texas, and makes it bigger than ever! SIX championship matches, how drastically will the landscape change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – MXM Collection VS Spanish Announce Project; wins.
  • Komander VS The Beast Mortos; wins.
  • Texas Deathmatch: Leyla Hirsch VS Diamante; wins.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championship Qualifier: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS The Dark Order; wins and advances to Battle of the Belts 11.
  • ROH World Tag Team Championships: The Kingdom VS Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O’Reilly; win(s) and
  • ROH World Television Championship Survival of the Fittest: Atlantis Jr. VS Lio Rush VS Shane Taylor VS Johnny TV VS Lee Johnson VS Brian Cage; wins and
  • ROH Pure Championship: Wheeler Yuta VS Lee Moriarty; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship: Billie Starkz VS Red Velvet; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Championship: Athena VS Queen Aminata; wins and
  • ROH World Championship: Mark Briscoe VS Roderick Strong; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 7.25.2024

Slammiversary Fallout! Where do things go on the way to Victory Road?

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Well now we start the fall out of Slammiversary. Josh Alexander in his bad bitch summer, X-Speedball legacy, ABC got the t-a-g and Jordynne is still in charge of the Knockouts division. Like I said at the end of Slammiversary, all of the champions being Babyfaces is stupid. They need to drop a couple titles fairly quickly, because I don’t care what some people say, Nic Nemeth ain’t gonna bring any eyes to the brand. He’s about as hot as day old Hamburger Helper over a camping sterno.

We’ll probably open with the luke warm champion, so tune in like 10 minutes late for anything of substance to be happen.

https://x.com/i/status/1816629254349533588

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner: Maclin wins via KIA – *
  • AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan: AJ wins via Down Payment – **
  • Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young): Hammer Your ASH wins via Torture Rack – ** 1/2
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey): Broken Alphabet wins via Twist & Splash – ***

 

Results:

Nemeth gives the ole “I’ll be a fighting champion…blah blah” promo and drops the “any company” line that we’ve already understood what that means. Campaign Singh cuts him off…and I never thought I’d be happy for Campaign Singh to walk out and say anything…ever. And…Mustafa’s promo is worse than Dolph’s. He’s gone from parody to caricature even saying “it was the biggest screw job Montreal ever saw”. Like some of these lines are cheap heat, but most are just brain dead comments that wouldn’t get a reaction out of anyone (and the crowd was silent for that comment). Mustafa gets caught in an Archer “phrasing” moment about getting screwed hard, but this is painful. Promos written by 14 year olds everyone…

This ends with Ali challenging Nemeth for the World Title. While I’m not against walk up challenges, I watch Japanese wrestling, I don’t really get the point aside from doing it just to do it. 

ABC and Matt Hardy have a small promo, and I’m still not really a fan of Unbroken Matt Version 6.0. The floating between Broken voice and his normal voice sounds amateurish.

OH LOOK, finally a match 20 minutes into the show. And it’s my son Steve Maclin! OH CHRIST he’s facing Deaner. This has been 25 minutes of talking followed by the worst god damn attempt at a gimmick. Deaner’s little “Papa Santino told me I can wipe my ass only if the crowd agrees”. This gimmick should die in a fire.

Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner

Deaner started off quick because Maclin was in disbelief that Deaner was actually gonna fight him. Maclin dodges a Crossbody, Busaiku Knee, and just starts beating on Deaner for fun. And this is fun, maybe Maclin can make sure Deaner gets stretchered out and written off forever. How do you call for an ambulance in French? Maclin with the old Back Breaker into a stretch. Deaner tries to nerd rage up, breaks the Back Breaker Stretch, his punch combo, into a Manhattan Drop and Bulldog. Deaner hits the Crossbody, but Maclin kicks out. This is entirely too competitive.

Deaner goes for the Deaner DDT, blocked, Olympic Slam into Splashing Deaner into the corner, Caught in the Crosshairs, K-I-A, thanks for coming you damn dweeb. Stay in Canada and don’t travel Deaner, please.

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AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan

As the bell sounds, Sami knocks Rich off the apron, Low Bridges AJ, does the Beats of the Bodhran on AJ and then AJ eats the offense and strategizes with his crew. Bishop and Rich swarm the ring, Sami allows himself to get distracted so AJ slides in and starts beating on Sami. AJ throats Sami across the middle rope and Rich makes his presence felt, AJ distracts the referee and Rich gets in a lot of cheap shots. Bishop throws Sami back in the ring, and AJ keeps up the pressure. Lots of 5 count chokes and leverage moves. After the commercial break ends, Sami dodges a Tennessee Whiskey Knee, gets in a few shots before Rich trips Sami as he’s setting up a Dive, and then AJ takes advantage of the position and hits the goofball knee strike.

AJ calls for his Chokeslam, Sami tries to break it with Axe Handles, then claws the eyes. Sami goes for a Scoop Slam, gets him part way up and then falls over. AJ Chokeslam again, but he bites his hand and starts fighting back. Launches himself at AJ, sends him bouncing off the ropes and uses the momentum to hit that Scoop Slam that was teased earlier. Sami goes for a Western Lariat but eats a Big Boot. AJ does a little Hulk Hogan pose to signal a Leg Drop, but Sami dodges and then connects on a Sliding Lariat. Thumbs Up, Thumbs….interference. Rich distracts the ref, Bishop lays out Sami, AJ connects with the Down Payment.

Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young)

ASH and Jordynne exchange slaps and then Jordynne starts to out muscle ASH. Spinebuster from Jordynne, Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights off, rope run, Sattelite DDT into both tagging out. EY does the Flair corner flop, slides back in between Hammer’s legs, and connects on a Neckbreaker. EY is the quicker of the two, but Hammer finally gets his hands on him and a Release Belly to Belly into a full mount raining of fists, then a near fall. Hammer smashes EY in a corner, Arm Wringer into an Irish Whip across, but EY moves and Hammer tags out to ASH. ASH levels Jordynne, peppers EY with a few shots and pulls him back to their corner and starts some tandem offense with Hammerman. Hammer Guerilla Presses ASH and throws her into EY for a near fall. Hammer looks to aim for either a Powerbomb or Nightmare Pendulum, but EY drops it into a Small Package, pinfall kick out, they both run, Double Lariat spot. The Knockouts get tagged in.

Jordynne is in control early, World’s Strongest Slam into a Vader Bomb. Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights it off and tags out to Hammer. Jordynne and EY do some schoolyard stuff with the old Push while Jordynne is down to trip Hammer. All four get in, ASH gets leveled, EY gets leveled, Hammer and Jordynne have a brief face off, but Hammer throws Jordynne to the apron and ASH connects with a Meteora from the apron. Death Valley Driver from Young on Hammer, ASH stares in shock, EY tells her to get, ASH runs away. EY goes up for his Macho Elbow, and ASH causes him to fall to Hammer’s feet, Torture Rack, and EY submits.

Josh Alexander comes out, with new heel music. And it’s not that bad, definitely better than some other people’s new music. Josh yells at the crowd a bit, says he can’t wait til he’s back in a real Canadian town, like his home of Toronto. Then he drops the mic in lieu of an explanation. The crowd chants him off with the “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey”. 

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The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey)

JDC and Hardy start, but JDC quickly tags out to Myers and that doesn’t go well. Hardy grabs a hold of Myers, a few Delete chops, drags him to his corner and they all get in a few shots punctuated with Hardy getting tagged back in and an Elbow into Myers’ extended and worked on left arm. Myers stays isolated, back into the corner, Boot to the gut, Ace tags in and wallops Myers. Ace connects on Double Kicks, into Russian Leg Sweep and his half of Click Click Boom, for a 2 count. Myers finally gets free with a Jaw Breaker and tags out to Eddie. But The System gets no momentum, Ace stifles Eddie’s offense and starts a few quick tags with him and Bey for tandem offense. Moose finally comes down the ramp as Eddie kicked out of yet another pinfall attempt because The System has had nothing going for them. Eddie finally gets some offense since Moose was a big enough distraction.

Eddie thinks they have a spot, so he tags back in JDC, but The ABC stop him cold, tag in Matt Hardy, and Matt walks down JDC, but JDC Low Bridges. Matt is on the outside, so all of The System surrounds Hardy, then Joe Hendry’s music hits! That stops the heel beatdown, and we follow Hendry’s entire entrance. So that proves Hendry is bigger than the 8 other people in this frame. Not really sure if that’s optics you want to push along. Ace and JDC try to remind people there’s wrestling going on, but JDC thumbs the eye to get a little something going. Vertical Suplex for a near fall, tag out for Eddie and Eddie lights up Ace with some of those NOAH Chops. Ace retreats to the ropes and Alisha chokes him with the ropes while the ref is distracted.

Myers gets tagged in, Ace tries to use the crowd energy, Myers stops it at first but then Ace slips a Scoop Slam and tags out to Bey. Hot tag, strike rush, Double Stomp, educated feet, Leap Frog to the corner but Lish climbs on the apron and yells at Bey which stops his rhythm. Myers kicks his feet out and causes Bey to crash. Eddie tags in for a few shots, then to JDC and Slingshot Knees, Wringer Snapmare, Bow and Arrow Submission, and JDC is just doing solid wrestling work right now. Uppercut between the Shoulder Blades as Bey tries to get out, tag to Myers and Bey is still eating offense. Eddie tags in, Bey tries the Sunset Flip, but Eddie tags out before going over, so Myers folds up Bey for a near fall and then tags out to JDC who connects on a Standing Suplex, slams Bey’s face into the corner, Eddie tags in, and Bey finally fights up to his feet, Eddie just flatten Bey’s comeback, tries a Tiger Driver but eats an Enzuigiri for a simultaneous tag. JDC and Hardy come in, JDC tries to exit halfway in, but Hardy is wrecking shop. He disposes of Eddie, Myers slides in but eats a tandem Neckbreaker/DDT from Hardy. Face team does the Delete Corner Face Smashes. Poetry in Motion into a Side Effect into Corkscrew Swanton for only 2 since Myers breaks it up! Everyone throwing hands, referee is distracted, Moose comes in to Spear Hardy, but Hardy dodges and throws him into JDC (I get the call back), Hendry then lays out Moose with the big Lariat. Twist of Fate from Hardy, Splash from Bey, Broken Alphabet wins!

 

Overall Score: 4/10

Ugh, cliche promos, too damn much talking, a competitive squash match with an imbecile as our first “match”, into an overbooked and slow heel match, finally a decent tag match (with the right team going over), into another overbooked match with a “tease” for the mystery backup being more obvious than Jericho’s WWF debut.

Aside from the afore mentioned tag match, The Rascalz promo and The System Promo; this was hard to watch. A lot of cornball promos, Rosemary licks her conspiracy board, storylines got zero traction. Whoopity Doo, Ryan Nemeth got a match next week and we get an undead wedding.

While this was a bad episode, it was bad by at least new standards. We’re not back in the TNA Dark Days again, but this was…a useless show.


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