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Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (3/28/22)

It’s RAW-stleMania!

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WWE Raw 2022

It’s a mighty Monday night before Mania!

We’re on the homestretch to WrestleMania, so WWE is giving us a WrestleMania level Raw! Will the action start early in one last Lesnar-Reigns face-off?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Rey Mysterio w/ Dominik Mysterio VS The Miz w/ Logan Paul; Rey wins.
  • 2v1 Handicap Match: Omos VS The Viking Raiders; Omos wins.
  • WWE 24/7 Championship Love is in the Air: Dana Brooke retains the title.
  • 8 Woman Tag: Sasha Banks, Naomi, Rhea Ripley & Liv Morgan VS Queen Zelina Vega, Carmella, Shayna Baszler & Natalya; Sasha, Naomi, Rhea & Liv win.
  • Ricochet VS Austin Theory; Theory wins.
  • 2v1 Handicap Match: Drew McIntyre VS Happy Corbin & Mad Cap Moss; McIntyre wins.
  • RKBRO VS The Usos; RKBRO wins, by disqualification.

PLAY BY PLAY

BROCK LESNAR is here!

Pittsburgh fires up because The Beast is back again! He waves his hat to the crowd and passes by the joint RawDown commentary. After a SmackDown recap video, Lesnar is in the ring and he has a mic. “Good evening, Pittsburgh. Your WWE Champion is in the house. I’m sorry I gotta do this. Y’see, for the last 20 years, that loudmouth Paul Heyman has been doing all the yapping for me, but I gotta do this for you tonight. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Monday Night Raw! That felt good but it felt like it sucked. I won’t be doing that again. But what i don’t suck at is handing out country ass-kickings.”

Lesnar says Sunday, WrestleMania 38, he’ll spoil his game plan here. HE has a hard time doing it but he will. Sunday, the spoiler is, they’ll take a trip down memory lane. Yeah, play along if you want. They’re going to take a trip down the streets of Suplex City, and then Lesnar will introduce Roman to the Beast of Broadway. And after that, “What?” They’ll go to the carnival, “WHAT?” and take a ride on the F5. No one survives riding the F5. And Steve will be there, too. Steve Austin is an ass-kicker, too, but he never kicked Lesnar’s ass. Okay, enough of that. After the carnival ride, this is where the party really starts!

“Roman, we’re gonna hit a wedding. We’re gonna be wedding crashers. My title is gonna marry your title. And it’s gonna have a baby! The Unified Title. And I get full custody.” Fans cheer that on and Lesnar holds up the world title. “I’m in a great mood tonight, because y’know why? At six days, in WrestleMania, I finally get my hands on Roman Reigns.” There’s no more running, nowhere to hide! This Sunday, WrestleMania, Lesnar will stand above Roman with two titles, and raise them to the sky. They will say, “Ladies and gentlemen, your NEW! REIGNIN! DEFENDING! UNIFIED! HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WORLD! BRRROCK! LESNAR!!” Will The Beast plant Suplex City right onto the Island of Relevancy?

 

Rey Mysterio w/ Dominik Mysterio VS The Miz w/ Logan Paul!

Before going 2v2 at WrestleMania, the King of Lucha and the Hollywood A-Lister face off here 1v1! Will Rey finally get a small portion of payback on Miz before getting the whole thing this weekend? Or will Miz make sure the Most Must-See Tag Team has all the momentum?

Raw returns and Miz has the mic and a smug grin. “I imagine Rey Mysterio has an incredible outfit planned for WrestleMania. Rey Mysterio has so many amazing outfits and masks. Y’know, my persona favorite mask of Rey Mysterio’s is the one I took from him last week!” And surely, Rey is livid and wants that mask back, but Miz gave that to the REAL greatest luchador in history! Please welcome “Lucha Logan!” Logan Paul handsprings out, wearing Rey’s stolen mask! Logan gets in the ring, high fives Miz, but Steel City boos. Miz introduces the greatest luchador ever, Lucha Logan, again.

Miz says unmasking Rey was the most disrespectful thing he could do. But when you don’t get respect that you’ve earned, you take it! Miz will keep taking it! He wants a mask of his own! Imagine these two guys wearing Rey Mysterio masks on the Grandest Stage of Them All! Whatever mask Rey is wearing tonight, Miz will take! But then the Mysterios interrupt Miz with their entrance! Rey brought his Batman mask, because he’s here for vengeance! Rey & Dom get in and Dom TACKLES Miz! Rey runs off “Lucha Logan” and demands he get that mask back! Miz bails out, Logan gets in, Dom rushes at Logan!

Logan bails out again and he regroups with Miz. “That close!” But then the ref EJECTS Dominik!? Fans boo, Dom has no choice but to storm back up the ramp, and now Rey is alone against the two biggest jerks in WWE today! Does he stand a chance in this unofficial handicap match?

The bell rings, Miz KNEES and CLUBS Rey, then ROCKS him to a corner. Miz whips corner to corner, Rey goes up and over, and then KICKS! Rey CLUBS away, whips, but Miz reverses. Rey tilt-o-whirl headscissors Miz away! Rey runs, ducks an dodges Miz, then baseball slides at Logan! Logan runs, Rey follows, Miz TACKLES Rey into barriers! And then DDT to the floor! Logan is laughing and high-fiving Miz as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns, Miz has Rey up top, and Miz rips at the mask! The ref counts, Rey throws body shots then headbutts Miz down! Rey adjusts, leaps, SEATED SENTON! Rey keeps moving, he fires forearms and CHOPS! Rey whips, Miz sunset flips but Rey rolls through to BUZZSAW! Logan coaches Miz but fans fire up for Rey. Rey tells Logan he’s gonna get this, and then he throws knees into Miz. Rey whips, Miz reverses to kick and reel Rey in. Miz lifts, rebounds Rey off ropes, but Rey sunset flips through! REY WINS!

Winner: Rey Mysterio, by pinfall

Logan is upset but Rey glares back at him. And DOM returns to put Logan in! Drop toehold onto ropes! The Mysterios dial it up, but Logan flops out to escape! But Rey snatches the mask away! No more Lucha Logan garbage, the mask is back in Rey’s possession! Dom SUPERKICKS Miz, Rey RANAS him onto ropes! DOUBLE 619! Logan is stunned as Dom goes up top for a FROG SPLASH! Rey goes up, he hits a FROG SPLASH! Miz felt all of the Mysterios’ wrath, but will there be plenty left over for Logan?

 

Veer is coming.

“You’ve been waiting, and now, your fate is sealed. Your fear is certain. Your fear is real. Next week, your fear is here.” The Monday after WrestleMania, the Million Dollar Arm is finally back!

 

Seth Rollins visited WWE HQ.

It was 6:57 AM this morning when The Visionary arrived for his meeting with Vince McMahon. Seth Freakin Rollins asks if he’s ready for Rollins. The receptionist says it’ll just be a few minutes. Then Rollins will take a seat. Then it’s 8:45 AM when “Mr. Rollins” was allowed in. Rollins walked past the secretary and it was the “moment of truth.” Rollins says hi to Vince, but Vince ignores him until Rollins walks closer. Rollins tries to get Vince’s attention but Vince still ignores him. That is, until Rollins sits with his feet up on Vince’s desk. Vince tells him to not do that, and Rollins sits up straight.

Rollins knows this is about the outburst last week, so let’s cut to the chase. Is it a fine? A suspension? Ban him from Raw or WrestleMania? No, it’s none of those. Rollins knows what it is. He’ll save Vince the trouble. “Seth Freakin’ Rollins, you’re FIRED~!” Is that it? Just rip the bandage off! Vince didn’t bring Rollins here to fire him. No? No. Then why is he here? Vince is a bit surprised that Rollins didn’t win his way to WrestleMania. Lots of failures. Yeah, well, not all of it is Rollins’ fault. Sonya, Pearce, it’s a long story. Well why didn’t he just ask Vince? Why did Rollins jump through all the hoops?

Wait, Rollins could’ve just come to Vince? Well, Vince wasn’t going to just give him something but he could’ve talked to Vince instead of jumping through hoops. But this year is different. This is the two-night and most stupendous WrestleMania ever. So could Vince have such a WrestleMania without Seth Freakin’ Rollins? Could he? Of course not. No, he could. But it would be a good idea to still have him on it. But if he were, it’d have to be his own main event. So then… Vince says Seth Freakin’ Rollins IS going to WrestleMania. Is this a trick? Nope. Now, he’s busy, so please go. But who is his opponent? Someone of Vince’s choosing, and you’ll know when you see them.

Well okay. Rollins is going to WrestleMania. Rollins shakes Vince’s hand, and sees himself out. Don’t disappoint. Rollins fires up. “I’M GOING TO WRESTLEMANIA!” Rollins runs around Vince’s room and even dances, then tells the T-Rex skull, “I told ya, baby!” Rollins even hops up on Vince’s desk! Rollins is feeling great, but will that mood be crushed when he meets the opponent of Vince’s choosing at Mania?

 

2v1 Handicap Match: Omos VS The Viking Raiders!

The mountain of a man has dominated everyone he’s been put up against, even when it was Apollo Crews & Commander Azeez at the same time. But will he be able to take on Erik & Ivar, who have been tag team champions everywhere they’ve gone?

Raw returns and the Viking Raiders make their entrance. Erik starts against Omos and he fires off fast body shots! Omos shoves Erik away, Erik ducks the clothesline to fire a forearm! Omos stays up, Erik runs, but Omos CLOBBERS him! Erik bails out, writhing from that collision. The ring count climbs, Ivar goes check on Erik, but the count is already 6 of 10. The count hits 10, Omos wins!

Winner: Omos, by count-out

Ivar is enraged and he rushes in, but into a ROUNDHOUSE from Omos! Omos tells the ref to raise his hand, not that the ref can even reach Omos’ hand up that high. If Erik was done with one clothesline, what hope does anyone have of ever bringing Omos down?

Kevin Patrick appears to congratulate Omos on that win. Omos is still undefeated, and yet to even fall over. Omos has been looking for a WrestleMania opponent, but is there anyone he feels could threaten him? Omos laughs and says there is no one! He will dominate everyone! Surely, there is someone- HERE COMES BOBBY LASHLEY! Omos is amused as The All Mighty returns! And he’s even dressed to compete! He storms his way up to the ring and gets right in front of Omos! Omos isn’t backing down, but Steel City is behind Lashley> Lashley nods at the Mania sign, but Omos pie faces him!

Lashley rams a shoulder but Omos doesn’t budge! Omos clamps onto Lashley’s head, and he throws him to a corner! Omos says Lashley doesn’t want this, but Lashley roars. Lashley RAMS Omos, Omos still stays up and clamps onto Lashley’s neck. Omos shoves, Lashley rebounds and dodges, and RAMS Omos down!! Omos is furious as he gets out, and he tells Lashley doesn’t want this! Lashley says otherwise, and fans are fired up as both men point to the sign! Will these two titans topple the ring and all of Dallas when they collide?

 

Reggie and Dana Brooke talk backstage.

He’s been wanting to talk to her about something for awhile. But it just seems like whenever it’s the perfect moment, things go sideways. She tells Reggie he could always talk to her about anything. Well, okay. Reggie kneels and asks Dana to- But she cuts him off! This is so sudden. Reggie says they don’t have to wait to have their WrestleMania Moment this weekend. They can have it right now, if she’ll have him. He has a ring?! He’s actually proposing?! Dana says yes! He puts the ring on her finger, and Tamina CLOBBERS them both!! Tamina throws Reggie away, then covers Dana! Reggie saves Dana and they run!

Akira Tozawa is in Tamina’s way! What is he doing in a suit? Oh, uh, well, he heard Reggie was gonna propose to Dana and… Tozawa kneels?! And has a ring?!? He says Tamina is his earth, his wind, and his fire. Will she do him the honor of- Tamina yanks him up to his feet, and says, “What do you think?” Uh… Is that a yes? She holds out her hand and says yes!! He puts the ring on her finger and now we have TWO engagements! Wait, the ring is too small… He gives it a little grease and it fits. They spin around like in the movies, and R-Truth is watching from the shadows. “That gives me an idea. By the power vested in me~!” Uh oh….!

 

Roman Reigns returns to Raw!

The Tribal Chief hasn’t been on Monday nights in months, but the longest reigning Universal Champion isn’t going to miss this! Roman, dressed in red, has Paul Heyman and the Usos with him. They raise the gold for the pyro, then continue to the ring. Then they raise the belts again for more pyro. Paul Heyman then hands Roman the mic, and fans are already torn. “Pittsburrrrgh! ACKNOWLEDGE ME! I was gonna come out here and I was gonna shine on ya. I was gonna talk about the last needle mover, we was gonna talk about God Mode, we was gonna talk about how I used to run Monday Night Raw, until Fox came begging for me to come save SmackDown.

“And those are facts. It’s all true. The Tribal Chief has done everything that you can do in this business, y’see? Except one thing. And if y’all keep Whattin’ me, I’ma smash y’all like I would Steve Austin! Just like I’m gonna smash Brock Lesnar! So like I was saying, The Tribal Chief has done everything. Except beat The Beast at WrestleMania. And that pisses me off!” Fans chant, “Suplex City!” and that doesn’t help Roman’s mood. Roman sighs and continues, “Let’s talk about Brock, then.” What really bothers Roman about Brock is that just a couple weeks ago, Brock was out for blood. It was personal for him. But he’s already spilled Roman’s blood.

In 2018, WrestleMania 34, Brock busted Roman wide open right at the hairline, then the top of his skull. Lesnar smashed Roman’s face to the point that Roman’s children didn’t even recognize him. His wife didn’t want him in this business, his father doubted him, his family was disappointed! And then Lesnar comes out and it’s just a game now! Suplex City, carnival, wedding, the titles will have a baby. Well that’s all good. Roman will change the game! Roman will take everything from Lesnar. Roman already took the Advocate and made him a Wise Man. Roman took Lesnar’s claim to the longest reign and got his receipt! And Roman took Lesnar’s blood at Madison Square Garden.

This Sunday, Roman makes the final move. Roman will take Lesnar’s title. Then, Brock, you will know what it’ll be like to make it personal. Roman will make it personal because it’s ALWAYS been personal for Roman! Roman sets the mic down, then raises up the finger. Will the Head of the Table be the one to become the one and only undisputed champion in WWE?

 

The WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions are having a photoshoot.

Carmella says that’s enough. It is exhausting being this beautiful. Queen Zelina is “absolutely chuffed” that they’re on the same page now. And they’ll look so stunning leaving the ring with these titles at WrestleMania. Vega can’t help but remember the shock and awe when they took out Liv, Rhea, Shayna and Natalya last week! Yeah, Shayna remembers that, too. She and Natty walk in, and Natty asks, “You really thought you could get one over on us with those cheap shots?” Not happening this week. So here is what will happen: Mella & Vega get behind the Queen of Harts & Queen of Spades, and they’ll make sure their team wins.

Then at Mania, Natty & Shayna walk out as NEW champions. So as long as Bootleg Barbie and the imposter queen here have their backs tonight, they can tear the other four limb by limb, and let the champs live long enough to see Mania. Got that? Good.

8 Woman Tag: Sasha Banks, Naomi, Rhea Ripley & Liv Morgan VS Queen Zelina Vega, Carmella, Shayna Baszler & Natalya!

We just heard from the Most Beautiful Woman in the WWE, the Queen of the Ring, and the queens of pain, but will tension like that only ensure they lose to the Boss, the Glow, the Nightmare and the Living End?

Raw returns and all eight women have assembled. The teams sort out, Liv and Natty start. They circle, Natty trips Liv, but Liv kicks her away. Liv gets up, dodges, and RANAS! Natty ends up in enemy territory, Liv runs in to back body block! Tag to Rhea, snapmare and basement dropkick! Rhea laughs as she drags Natty up, but Naomi snipes the tag. Naomi wrenches Natty, but Natty breaks free to throw hands! Tag to Shayna, the Queens mug Naomi, then Vega tags in. She also gets in on the mugging with some stomps, then she waves to the crowd. But Naomi hits a JAWBREAKER! Naomi brings Vega over, BULLDOG to buckles!

Tag to Sasha, she and Naomi get the fans fire up, DOUBLE BOOT WASH! Cover, Mella breaks it! Naomi ROCKS Mella and whips, but Mella boots back! Shayna gets in to ROUNDHOUSE Naomi! Liv gets in to dropkick Shayna! Natty gets in to DISCUS LARIAT Liv! Rhea gets in to HEADBUTT Natty! Mella FABULOUS KICKS Rhea! Sasha spins Mella but Vega drags Sasha out! Vega whips Sasha into barriers! Then KNEES her down! Mella and her team actually are working together well, and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns and Mella leans on Sasha with the chinlock. Sasha endures, her team rallies the fans, but Mella knees Sasha and whips her to the other corner. Sasha BOOTS back, fires off forearms on everyone else, then spins Mella to a BACKSTABBER! Both Mella and Sasha are down but Sasha crawls her way over. Only for Natty and Shayna to yank Liv and Rhea off the apron! Naomi is still there, Shayna tags in off Mella. Shayna drags Sasha away and DECKS Naomi! Shayna brings Sasha up, bumps her off buckles but Sasha elbows her back. Then BOOTS her! Sasha goes up, but Shayna stops the headscissor to a STRETCH MUFFLER!

Natty tags in, Shayna brings Sasha up, Natty runs, HART ATTACK! Vega tags in and pushes Natty away so she can cover! But Shayna drags Vega off! They argue, seeing as how they’re on the same team right now, but then Mella drags Shayna out. Shayna DECKS Mella! Vega is furious, she storms over to Sasha, but Sasha blocks her kick! Sasha tags Naomi in, then KNEES Vega! Naomi ROUNDHOUSES! Liv tags in and then Rhea tags in! WING SNAPPER to RIPTIDE!! Cover, Rhea’s team wins!

Winners: Sasha Banks, Naomi, Rhea Ripley & Liv Morgan, by pinfall

Graves comforts Mella and tries to say she’ll win at Mania, but it doesn’t look it to everyone else! Is there no doubt that we will see NEW WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions?

 

The WWE Hall of Fame has two more inductees!

Holler if ya hear me! The Steiner Brothers, Scott & Rick, are both going in as a tag team! They were all over tag team wrestling, from WCW to WWE to even around the world in Japan! And now, they’re immortalized in the HOF!

 

WWE takes a look back at the career of “Stone Cold” Steve Austin.

“Austin 3:16 says I just whipped yer ass!” And from the moment Austin said that, he did what he wanted when he wanted. “And that’s the bottom line, because Stone Cold said so!” King of the Ring, Royal Rumble, world titles and general badass moments, he was on top of the world! Brash, tough, rough, and up for some fun, what wasn’t there to love about ol’ Stone Cold? The biggest draw ever, a true needle mover, “OH HELL YEAH!” Will he add Kevin Owens to the long, long, long list of those he’s opened up a can o’ whoop-ass on?

 

Kevin Owens is in the ring!

Speaking of KO, he says, “Wasn’t that an incredible tribute to Stone Cold Steve Austin?” NO one does video packages better than the WWE. True angles of editing. But as great as all that was, it’s noting compared to Kevin’s “tribute” last week! We all saw it, right? IT was amazing, right? Some people thought Kevin was mocking Austin. What? Those are lies. WHAT? THOSE ARE LIES! That was an homage to the Austin we all love and remember. Everyone is ecstatic that Austin is Kevin’s guest on the KO Show at the “main event” of WrestleMania Saturday, and so is Kevin.

But last week wasn’t just Kevin paying tribute, that was also Kevin doing everyone watching a favor. Because that last week, Kevin cosplaying Stone Cold, is the closest we will ever get to the ol’ Stone Cold we used to admire. Because that Stone Cold is GONE! Has been for 19 years! What? He’s been gone! WHAT? NINETEEN YEARS! And he ain’t ever coming back. At Mania, it won’t be Stone Cold, it’ll just be “Steve.” And that’s still cool. That’s the same Steve who has been drinking himself into oblivion for 19 years. The same Steve who is so bored on his own ranch that he’s begging everyone to come onto his podcast so they can talk about the old days and make him feel good!

But hey. That’s Steve! Still sounds and looks like Stone Cold. We saw the video of him and the golf cart. Heavily edited, probably, but he even still talks a big game like Stone Cold. Austin knows he has to but Kevin will show Austin isn’t coming to pick a fight. Austin knows damn well what’d happen! Austin is coming to have another little conversation about his career. He wants a nice little chat. And y’know what? Kevin is honored “Steve’ accepted the invitation and Kevin will do that. Kevin is a good person so he’ll give Steve the biggest platform he’s ever had. The WrestleMania Edition of the KO Show will make Austin feel good and give him the sendoff he thinks he deserves.

Kevin will even do something very special. Kevin hates beer, it is disgusting. But he’ll drink one with Austin> They’ll sit down in the ring at AT&T Stadium and have a toast, even! A toast to Austin finally officially passing the torch to Kevin, not only as the new “Stone Cold,” but the one true master of the Stunner! Cuz Kevin 3:16 says his stunner is better than Austin’s! And if you think his stunner is better, give him a hell yeah! “HELL NO!” And then Austin can be on his way. Doesn’t it sound perfect? It does to Kevin. But just a friendly warning: if Steve tries to get funny with Kevin, there will be a stunner Steve will be on the end of, OH HELL YEAH.

Kevin will repeat that just to be sure. “Steve, if you try to pick a fight with me on the KO Show, I will end up pouring one of your very own beers onto your lifeless carcass after I open up a can of whoop-ass on you! And that’s the bottom line, because KO said so!” Is the Prizefighter riling up the Texas Rattlesnake a little too much this close to meeting face to face?

 

Ricochet VS Austin Theory!

The One and Only has his hands full this Friday as he takes on both Los Lotharios for the Intercontinental Championship. Meanwhile, Vince McMahon’s protégé is preparing for Pat McAfee. Will Ricochet show up Vince’s new pet project? Or will Theory add another champion to his selfie gallery?

Raw returns and Theory makes his entrance. The bell rings, Theory fires off on Ricochet then stomps a mudhole in the corner. The ref counts, Theory lets off, and he scoops Ricochet to FALL AWAY SLAM! Theory grins but fans chant, “We Want Pat!” Theory gets mad, but runs into BOOTS, then a SHOTGUN dropkick! Theory ends up in a corner as Ricochet kips up. Ricochet elbows Theory, whips corner to corner, then runs in to RAM and bump and BOOT Theory away! Ricochet springboards, FLYING LARIAT! Fans fire up with Ricochet and STANDING SHOOTING STAR! Cover, TWO!

Ricochet watches Theory crawl as he aims from the corner. Ricochet runs in but Theory dodges to then fireman’s carry! Ricochet slips off, dodges and ENZIGURIS! Theory is down, Ricochet hurries up the corner! Ricochet reaches the top, but Theory hits ropes to trip him up! Theory drags Ricochet off into a fireman’s carry, A T L! Cover, Theory wins!

Winner: Austin Theory, by pinfall

Another match, another win, and another selfie. Theory gloats and takes more selfies as he exits, but will the fun be over when he faces off with McAfee?

 

Triple H officially retires from in-ring competition!

The Game has called it Game Over after 27 years as a superstar. He helped hundreds of others get into this business, so surely we all can say, #ThankYouHHH.

 

Bianca Belair is here!

The EST is back after the brutal beating from Becky Lynch that damaged her throat. Bianca gets a mic and says she shouldn’t really be talking, but she has to address this. Fans cheer her own and she tells Becky, “you came out here and you talked about all the things you’d do to make sure that title never left your waist. But two weeks ago, I found out just how low you would stoop. Let’s be real. I threatened your whole existence, my confidence threatened you. The way I hold my head high even when I get knocked down, that threatened you, and that’s why you act the way that you do.

“Not only did you try to injure me and take out of WrestleMania, but you come out here week after week and you run your mouth and you constantly bash my name, you play the victim, and you try to ruin my reputation. But girl… uh-uh. They don’t call me the EST for no reason. So congratulations, Becky, you took me out for a week. But now I am right back here tonight on Monday Night Raw like I never even left.” Fans cheer that on, and Bianca says, “Becky, even after everything that you have tried, I am still standing here. So enough is enough, this has been going on for far too long. This started all back at SummerSlam.

“And ever since SummerSlam, you have tried to use every trick in the book to escape with that title. You have tried everything. You attacked me, and you deliberately tried to end my career, but that didn’t work. You tried to break my throat and break my spirit, but that didn’t work. So what else you got, huh?” Bianca will tell Becky: absolutely nothing! There is nothing that can stop Bianca from coming for the title. So Saturday, WrestleMania, Bianca is coming for Becky and will take that title to walk out Raw Women’s Champion, and there’s not a damn thing Becky can do about it.

But speaking of, here comes Becky in person! But Bianca knows it was a sneak attack! She stopped the chair shot, and the two are scrapping! Bianca RAMS Becky into the corner again and again and then she stomps a mudhole! Bianca rains down fists, but lets off too soon! Becky throws Bianca down by her hair! Becky gets the chair back, and JAMS Bianca in stomach, before she SMACKS her on the back! Becky looms over Bianca and says, “There’s nothing else I can do? I said I was coming for your hair, Bianca.” Becky brings out SCISSORS! And big ones!! She grabs the ponytail, but the refs rush out! Bianca fights up to torture rack! KISS OF DEATH!!

Bianca is snarling, knowing what Becky just tried to do to her! So she hauls Becky back up, KISS OF DEATH again! Fans fire up as Bianca looms over Becky, and Bianca looks at the scissors. Bianca thinks about it, and she picks the scissors up! Fans fire up as Bianca walks over to Becky, pulls her hair, and cuts off a big lock of it! And then another! Bianca is giving Big Time Becks a big time makeover! Pearce and Sonya rush out but Bianca snips off more and more! Bianca finally stops and keeps some of those fiery locks for a souvenir. Becky wakes up and realizes what just happened! Now Becky is furious, and she grumbles, “I am going to end her!” Will these two be out for blood at Mania?

 

Becky is fuming backstage.

Sarah asks her about the match with Bianca. After what we just saw- Becky snatches the mic and throws it away. Becky tells Bianca, “You bitch!” And then she storms off. Will Becky’s rage build these last few days into an inferno that burns down the EST?

 

2v1 Handicap Match: Drew McIntyre VS Happy Corbin & Mad Cap Moss!

Before the Scottish Warrior goes 1v1 with the head hyena, he’ll have to take on them both! Will Mad Cap be more of a meat shield than a tag partner for Corbin? Or can they manage to get the upper hand on McIntyre before WrestleMania?

Raw returns and the Happy Folks make their entrance. The bell rings and Corbin actually starts with McIntyre. They tie up, McIntyre shoves Corbin away but Corbin pushes back. McIntyre doesn’t budge, so Corbin tags out and bails! Moss is surprised but McIntyre TOSSES Moss in! Then CLOBBERS him! Then TOSSES Him to a corner! McIntyre fires off haymakers on Moss but the ref counts. McIntyre lets off, reels Moss in, OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! Moss gets up and swings on McIntyre, but McIntyre gets around to NECKBREAKER! McIntyre kips up and fans fire up! McIntyre glares at Corbin, then throws Moss his way!

McIntyre dares Corbin to tag back in! Corbin says alright, NOPE. He leaves the apron and goes up the ramp! Corbin says this will wait until WrestleMania. McIntyre HEADBUTTS Moss down! And the countdown begins! Three, two, one CLAYMORE! Cover, McIntyre wins!

Winner: Drew McIntyre, by pinfall

But Corbin attacks from behind! The hyena is more like a weasel, and he POSTS McIntyre! Then POSTS him the other way! Then drags McIntyre up, for END OF DAYS! Corbin then grabs McIntyre’s sword! And he leaves with it! Hasn’t Corbin confiscated Angela the Claymore before? Will McIntyre not just beat Corbin at WrestleMania but break him in two for this?

 

Edge speaks.

The Iconoclast sits with a scale. “Last week on Raw, I had a choice to make. Do I blast Seth Rollins with the chair and give him another beating this Sunday at WrestleMania? One that he deserves, and it was very tempting. Or do I let fate take its course?” But Edge has taken fate into his own hands, so it was serendipity that it needed to be AJ Styles. Edge and Styles need each other. Styles needed Edge to pull off “the veil of mediocrity” Styles had put on himself so he could remember he is an era defining superstar! So you’re welcome. But Edge needed Styles to become this! The wild light, blind and bright, the benchmark of the WWE!

They’ve already pushed each other to better places, but Edge will keep soaring while Styles stagnates. Finally, after 20 years being parallel, collecting titles and blowing off roofs, they will face off on the Grandest Stage of them All for a match of the ages! But Styles, Edge saw the look in your eyes last week. Edge is already roaming inside Styles’ head. WrestleMania will be Styles’ judgement day. His judgement… is sealed. Edge puts a little weight on one side to tip the scales, but will Styles defy Edge’s omnipotence and make Mania truly phenomenal?

 

Backstage interview with AJ Styles.

Sarah asks his response to Edge’s comments. Well, Edge used a lot of words to justify another cheap shot. It was a month ago where Edge grabbed a steel chair and cracked Styles in the back of the head not once but twice. And since then, Edge’s music has changed, Edge has changed, as if he were trying to get in Styles’ head. “Mission accomplished. “All Styles has thought about is what he’ll do to Edge when they get in that ring. If Edge wants the Pitbull, well Styles will do a lot worse than that! Edge wants to destroy Styles? The feeling is mutual! Edge says the judgement is coming, but the Phenomenal AJ Styles will give the entire WWE Universe will never forget!

 

Rick Boogs is on Raw!

And just as he does on Fridays, he is rocking! He introduces himself, and how he is here to rock with one-half of the future SmackDown Tag Team Champions, Shinsuke… NakamurAAAAAA~! The King of Strong Style and Boogs go to the ring, because they want to watch tonight’s Champions VS Champions tag main event!

RKBRO VS The Usos!

Randy Orton & Matt Riddle will be facing two teams in The Alpha Academy and the Street Profits, but Jimmy & Jey are taking on Nakamura & Boogs. But who will be the ones proving they’re the best tag team champions in WWE?

Raw returns and the Viper & the Stallion make their entrance. The teams sort out and Orton starts with Jimmy. Orton kicks and EuroUppers but Jimmy hits back. Jimmy CHOPS, Orton pokes him in the eye! Orton uppercut Jimmy down, tags Riddle, and ASSISTED FLOATING BRO! Jey gets in, the Usos double superkick but they’re both blocked! They block Double RKBROs, and then bail out. The Usos talk smack to Boogs & Nakamura, but Riddle SMACKS Jey off the desk, then Orton BACK SUPLEXES Jimmy onto the desk! Then Riddle BACK SUPLEXES Jey onto the desk! Boogs, Nakamura and Steel City are fired up as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns again and Jimmy gives Orton stomps much like Orton does! Jimmy whips Orton to a corner but Orton comes back to CLOBBER Jimmy! Orton gives those stomps back with interest, too! Boogs likes it, and fans rally for “Randy! Randy!” Orton scrapes laces on Jimmy’s face, then tags Riddle. RKBRO mugs Jimmy, then Riddle gut wrenches to TOSS Jimmy! Riddle brings Jimmy up but Jimmy powers him to the corner. Tag to Jey, he runs in to forearm smash! Jey talks trash on Riddle, drags him up, but Riddle BOOTS him! Riddle runs in to forearm smash! Then a forearm for Jimmy, then a forearm for Jey!

BROSPLODER and BROTON! Cover, ONE!! Jey is hanging tough but Riddle is after him in the corner. Riddle whips, Jey reverses, but Riddle goes up and over. Jey ducks a kick, shoves Riddle and fireman’s carries, SAMOAN DROP! Cover, TWO! Tag to Jimmy, the Usos stomp away then Jimmy rains down fists. Jimmy digs his knees into Riddle and chokes him on the ropes. The ref backs Jimmy off but Jey gets a cheap shot in! Orton protests but Jimmy tags Jey. The Usos split the wishbone on Riddle! Jey taunts Riddle, talks trash to fans, then chokes Riddle on ropes. The ref backs Jey off, and now Jimmy gets a cheap shot!

Orton is furious again but the ref keeps him back. Jey taunts Riddle, lets him crawl, but then facelocks to keep him from Orton. Fans rally, Riddle counter punches Jey! And again, and again! Jey hits low, whips Riddle hard into the corner, then tags Jimmy. Jimmy sits Riddle up for a chinlock and he grinds Riddle down. Riddle endures, but Jimmy stomps him down! Tag to Jey, the Usos stomp Riddle more, then Jey stands Riddle up. Riddle ROCKS Jey with forearms, then fires off palm strikes and forearms! Riddle whips, Jimmy tags, and Jey reverses the whip to shove Riddle into another cheap shot!

Jey dropkicks Riddle out of the ring, and then the Usos bring him up to whip him over the barriers and into the timekeeper’s area! The Usos raise their fingers, they the ones in charge as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns once again, and Jey is just holding Riddle away from Orton! Riddle swings on Jey but Jey gets around for a back suplex NECKBREAKER! Jey tells Pittsburgh to quiet down, and then he swipes at Orton! The ref keeps Orton back and the Usos laugh at him. Jey shouts, “UCE!” but fans boo. Riddle runs in to RUNNING KNEE Jey down! Both men are down in the corner and fans fire up! Riddle and Jey crawl, hot tags to Jimmy and Orton! Fans fire up as the Viper rallies! Big clotheslines, then a duck and a- NO, Jimmy holds ropes to deny the powerslam! Jey tags in, Jimmy runs at Orton, but into a POWERSLAM!

Orton fires up and he brings Jimmy up to put into the ropes. But Jey rolls Orton up! TWO, and Orton dodges Jey! POWERSLAM! Fans fire up with Orton as he puts Jey through ropes. Jimmy anchors Jey but Riddle KICKS and FLOATING BRO ATTACKS! Orton still has Jey, DRAPING DDT! And now he hears the voices! Jey staggers up, but the PROFITS attack?!?

Winners: RKBRO, by disqualification

Riddle gets in to go after the Profits, but they and the Usos mug RKBRO! The Usos toss Riddle out while the Profits keep Orton down. But Boogs & Nakamura go after the Usos! Nakamura throws Jey out, Boogs pumps and TOSSES Jimmy! Jimmy hotshots off the ropes, Boogs powers him out and takes him away! SmackDown’s teams fight their way to the back, but Dawkins sets Orton up for Ford. But Riddle gets in, RKO for Dawkins! Ford jumps over Riddle, gets baited in, POP-UP RKO!! Fans fire up as the Raw Tag Team Champions stand tall!

Wait, Riddle and Orton get Ford up, fans want “One More Time!” Dawkins crawls into the ring, to see Ford get an RKO! Riddle wants another, and Orton says his pal is gonna get one! Dawkins gets an RKO from Riddle! But will the Viper & Stallion still be golden when they have to worry about Ford, Dawkins and the Alpha Academy?


My Thoughts:

It seems “WrestleMania Raw” is literally just a name. This was not a WrestleMania level of Raw but just another underwhelming go-home. One too many recaps, and only the main event was all that good as a match. It really was a great segment, though, the Usos and RKBRO being great tag teams, and even having Boogs & Nakamura ringside was good. The Profits attacking adds to their apparent Heel turn, and it seems the math says RKBRO loses. They stood tall to close the show, and being in a Triple Threat, it’s that much easier for them to lose the titles without really losing. And if it’s the Profits, that’d be a great combination with them being more Heel to stay fresh.

Lesnar had a good opener to put his final stamp on things, and Roman had a good response in his segment, but it’s pretty much solidified. Roman is winning, and he’s already got a red tracksuit for when he shows up on Mondays from now on. The Mysterios with Miz & Logan tonight was alright. We all knew Logan would wear the mask, but Miz and even Corey Graves on commentary were hamming it up a bit too much with the “Lucha Logan” joke. The Mysterios get to stand tall and take the mask back, so that’s a bad sign that Miz & Logan are winning.

WWE posted that entire Seth Rollins segment with Vince online, so time was wasted somewhere in the process. But in the end, they’re keeping us guessing until the very last moment. It will surely still be Rollins VS Cody, so long as Vince doesn’t get some other idea in the next few days. Poor Viking Raiders. They could’ve and should’ve been SmackDown Tag Champs already. But instead, they got eaten by Omos and they’ll lose the Andre the Giant Battle Royal this Friday. But hey, Lashley’s back way earlier than anyone expected! He had a pretty great moment with Omos, they’ll have a great match at Mania, but I can’t be sure Lashley wins that with how strong they’ve made Omos.

We’re totally getting a double wedding at WrestleMania, aren’t we? R-Truth is totally officiating, and he is totally messing it up on purpose to get that title off Dana. As for the kayfabe romances of Dana x Reggie and Tozawa x Tamina, they’re probably just going to be casualties of this 24/7 Championship Division. The 8 Woman Tag we got tonight was pretty good, but it only adds to my worries that a Fatal 4 is going to keep the titles on Vega & Mella. I hope not, but that’s usually how go-home math goes. We got a really good Stone Cold vignette, as Kevin himself said, and Kevin had a great promo here, but this is totally setting up one last Stone Cold Stunner.

Ricochet being here tonight was a missed opportunity. Team up Ricochet and Finn against Los Lotharios, have Damian Priest show up, he and Los Lotharios get to stand tall and that ensures Ricochet retains on Friday and Finn retains whenever he faces Priest. Theory getting such an easy win over another midcard champion is just annoying to me. Bianca Belair had a great promo, and Becky going after her was great stuff. The whole thing with going after hair was also great, too bad they aren’t following through with a Hair VS Title situation. But Bianca standing tall here, I can only think that Becky uses Champion’s Advantage as the last way to screw Bianca over.

McIntyre of course wins the 2v1 because Moss takes the loss. Corbin does stand tall and takes the sword, so McIntyre is gonna Claymore him back to being Bumass Corbin. Plus, Corbin and Moss should get to a point of breaking up as a duo because Moss has been making jokes at Corbin’s expense, and Corbin’s been using Moss as the lackey. Then McIntyre can go for some title, or maybe even Money in the Bank. Edge and Styles each had their own good promo, and I feel like their match could go either way. Leaning towards this new persona Edge is using, it’d be a bit of a shame if his first match in this character was a loss.

My Score: 8/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (4/26/24)

It’s Draft Day!

Published

on

And with the first overall pick of the 2024 WWE Draft, SmackDown selects…

The WWE Draft returns for 2024, the first four rounds being right here on Friday Night SmackDown! With champions protected, who ends up where to challenge them?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Rey Mysterio & Dragon Lee w/ Zelina Vega & Carlito VS Angel Garza & Humberto Carrillo; Rey & Dragon win.
  • Bron Breakker VS Cedric Alexander; Bron wins.
  • WWE Women’s Championship #1 Contender’s Match: Naomi VS Tiffany Stratton; No Contest.
  • Cody Rhodes VS Carmelo Hayes; Cody wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Backstage interview with Paul Heyman.

Kayla Braxton is with the Wise Man and says that here on night one of the Draft, there are already rumors circulating, including those about The Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns. Heyman will clarify these are not rumors regarding The Tribal Chief, Roman… Reigns. These are facts! Ladies and gentlemen, Your Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns, has voluntarily withdrawn from eligibility for this year’s Draft. That is not a negative but a positive. Who built SmackDown since the Pandemic? Roman Reigns. Who is the biggest star in the entire industry? Roman Reigns. Why would Roman Reigns hog the number one draft pick spotlight when he won’t be returning in the immediate future?

Read into his words, Kayla, that is not what a real Tribal Chief would do. Instead now, the pressure is on Nick Aldis. Because if Roman Reigns isn’t the first draft pick, then who is? The first two picks make history in a brand new era. And Heyman doesn’t know about you, but he is intrigued. No Tribal Chief up for grabs, who gets their opportunity to shine in the spotlight?

 

SmackDown throws it to the NXT Performance Center.

Jackie Redmond says the emotion down here is palpable! There is excitement, hope, and a little bit of nerves. But for these NXT Superstars, tonight is the culmination of a lifetime of hard work, dedication, a little bit of luck and a whole lot of self-belief. It was just last year that the NEW WWE Tag Team Champion, Grayson Waller, was hoping his name would be called. And it is funny this is NXT, but time to buy a vowel, throw in an E! Who is next? We find out tonight! The draft pool is deep, who rises to the top of the list?

 

Corey Graves is in the ring.

Corey welcomes Cincinnati and all of us at home to night one of the 2024 WWE Draft. Understandably, the GMs have their hands full, so Corey will be moderating the contract signing for the WWE Championship match that takes place next Saturday for Backlash: France. Without further ado, it’s the #1 contender, The Phenomenal AJ Styles! Styles makes his entrance, taking a seat at the table on camera right. And now, the Undisputed WWE Champion, the American Nightmare, Cody Rhodes! Cincy fires up and sings along, “WHOA~ OH~!” as Cody makes his entrance and gets his pyro before joining everyone in the ring.

Styles looks over the contract, absolutely tuning out the fans going wild for “CODY! CODY!” Styles then gets the mic to say before he signs, he doesn’t know if we realize that we’ve got two Georgia boys about to mix it up for the first time, and for the biggest prize in the game. Styles understands why they boo, but they gotta know that he doesn’t respect LA Knight, LA Knight got under his skin. He accepts that. But that’s why Styles lost at Mania. But what happened? Styles got his composure back and realized that he is Phenomenal. Styles BEAT Knight to earn the right to face Cody Rhodes at Backlash.

Now unlike Knight, Styles does respect Cody. They hadn’t crossed paths yet, but they’ve been down the same roads. They had to prove themselves outside of the WWE. And Styles is willing to believe that the same man who gave him advice a long time ago gave Cody the same advice, on how to stand on their own two feet and be the men they are today. That man was The American Dream, Dusty Rhodes. The fans cheer for “DUSTY! DUSTY!” Styles learned a lot from Dusty. Styles gets a little emotional thinking about Dusty, he was a good man. Dusty taught Styles how to carry himself, and to carry the weight of a championship.

And Styles looks at this WWE Championship here. The weight of this isn’t just the leather and gold. And at Backlash, we see if Cody can carry it. Styles goes back to his table, signs the contract, and then hands it off to Corey. Corey brings that to Cody, and Cody picks up his mic. “So… Cincinnati…! Whadda we wanna talk about? Certainly, we can talk about respect. There is not a locker room on Earth that you’ll find where everyone in it, every single person, they all respect AJ Styles. Last week, I went on to say you are the modern day Excellence of Execution. I respect the roads that you have traveled down to get here, the parallel paths that perhaps you and I have.

“Mutual respect, much respect. But that respect goes by the wayside at Backlash. I can feel it in your words to a degree. You’ve been here before. And it seems you’re implying that I cannot carry the weight of that championship. Well, good thing the man who trained me not far from where I sit now used to tell me all the time, it’s not about winning the title, it’s about keeping it.” The fans cheer that. Cody says boy does he respect Styles’ familiarity with Cody’s last name. But when you put C O D Y in front of it on this paper, that means they’ve never touched before. That means Backlash is a level playing field.

That means no matter how Phenomenal Styles is, this isn’t a dream match for Cody. It’s a must-win! Cody signs while the fans cheer, and it is official! Cody even throws the pen to the crowd as a free souvenir. Cody then offers a handshake, and Styles says y’know what? It was a beautiful thing to see Cody #FInishTheStory and win the title. But it’s a shame that Cody’s title reign will end at Backlash. Styles still shakes Cody’s hand, and then walks away. Cody picks up the belt and holds it high, will he get to hold it high again in Lyon, France?

Triple H is here!

Just as Cody was on his way to the back, The Game makes his way out here! HHH raises Cody’s hand, then invites him over to the podium. HHH welcomes us to the first round of the 2024 WWE Draft. It is a night that changes the landscape of the WWE going into the future, and things are a bit different this year. As the GMs ponder their next steps, they have to understand it is about protecting the roster they have as it is making the roster they want. Meaning that when they use their picks, they have just as much of a chance gaining a superstar as they do losing one they already have.

HHH just felt that since champs are protected and Cody will be staying here on SmackDown, maybe Cody could help read the SmackDown picks and HHH can read the Raw picks. And since SmackDown goes first, Cody reads first. Cody takes the card to say that with the first pick of the 2024 WWE Draft, SmackDown selects… The E S T, Bianca Belair! The stongEST, fastEST, roughEST, toughEST stays on Friday nights! HHH reads that for the second pick of the 2024 WWE Draft, Raw selects… YEET! JEY USO! Monday nights will still have Main Event Jey Uso! And the fans “YEET!” Cody says for the third pick, SmackDown selects… NXT’s Carmelo Hayes!

The fans fire up as SmackDown manages to snag… HIM! The former NXT Champion makes history again by being the first NXT superstar to be chosen this high in the Draft! HHH says that’s a hell of a pick. But then the fourth and final pick of this first round, Raw selects… SETH! FREAKIN’! ROLLINS! It is still going to be Monday Night Rollins as the Visionary stays on the red brand! Cody and HHH shake hands, and then Melo makes his way out! Melo has the mic to say when they talk about who’s next up, about who’s the hottest out, they don’t call them “the hottest out,” they just call him “Carmelo Hayes.”

The fans chant “WHOOP DAT TRICK!” to remind Melo how he’s leaving NXT. Melo says okay, okay. But then to Cody Rhodes, ever since Cody won the title, he’s been talking about “If you aim for the king, you best not miss.” Well, funny how that works. Because when Melo shoots, Melo don’t miss. And as a first round draft pick, what better way to shoot his shot on SmackDown than to shoot it right at Cody? Melo leaves the mic with Cody but Cody picks it up to say, “Fortune certainly favors the bold, but I dunno. You folks don’t wanna see me in action tonight, do ya?” The fans go wild! Oh, but what if Cody forgot his gear?

Oh that’s right! He didn’t forget his gear! And this title right here, for Cody, means absolutely 100%, Melo’s on! They shake on it, and we’re about to see a huge first-time-ever showdown! But will this bold first move work out for… HIM?

 

Rey Mysterio & Dragon Lee w/ Zelina Vega & Carlito VS Angel Garza & Humberto Carrillo!

The LWO is still not convinced Legado Del Fantasma had nothing to do with the beating that took the Boy Wonder out ahead of WrestleMania. Will the King of Lucha help get to the bottom of things? Or will Angel & “Berto” make it as easy as ABC, 1-2-3?

The teams sort out, Dragon runs up on Humberto but Humberto LARIATS him down! Humberto drags Dragon up, tears the shirt away and CHOPS! Humberto whips, Dragon ducks ‘n’ dodges to RANA! Humberto tumbles out, Dragon builds speed and FLIES! Direct hit and down goes Humberto! The fans fire up as Dragon pushes Humberto into the ring, goes up a corner, and then CROSSBODIES! Cover, TWO! Dragon facelocks to drag Humberto up, but Humberto wrenches out to CLUB Dragon down. Humberto waistlocks but Dragon throws elbows. Angel tags in as Humberto shoves Dragon. Dragon ducks but Angel holds ropes open, and Dragon tumbles to the floor!

The fans boo and LWO hurries to check on Dragon! Angel & Humberto just soak up the heat as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and both Dragon and Humberto are down! They crawl, hot tags to Angel and Rey! The fans fire up as Rey ducks ‘n’ dodges and tilt-o-whirl RANAS! Angel ends up in a corner, he puts Rey on the apron, but Rey ROCKS Angel! Rey goes up to SEATED SENTON! Rey keeps moving, wrenches and kicks, then hops on! CODE RED! Cover, Humberto breaks it! The fans boo but Humberto hauls Rey up. Rey fights and RANAS Humberto up and out! But Angelo kicks, scoops, but Rey slips free! Angelo kicks low, reels REy in, and underhooks, but Rey fights those to RANA Angel onto ropes! Rey dials it up to 619!

Tag to Dragon and he takes aim! Angel stands, into the tilt-o-whirl, PROJECT DRAGON!! Cover, LWO wins!

Winners: Rey Mysterio & Dragon Lee, by pinfall

Carlito and Zelina hug it out with the team, but then Santos Escobar & Elektra Lopez walk out here. Santos says whoa, whoa, whoa, hold that celebration. Because Santos is many things, but a liar is not one of them. And when Santos said he did NOT attack Dragon that night before Mania, he meant it. Elektra has been working for weeks to track down the security footage from that night. And Rey… Oh, Rey. What you’re about to see, you will find very, very interesting. The footage plays, and it was CARLITO!! Carlito throw Dragon around backstage! No one can believe it, because of how well Carlito fooled even Dragno.

Speaking of, Carlito RAMS Dragon into Rey, then hits a BACKSTABBER! Never has that move’s name been more fitting! Carlito runs away in a panic, and Rey stands back up in a rage! Santos says he told Rey that he was right all along. They were supposed to be family, and yet look how that turned out. How will the LWO recover from this shocking development?

 

Bron Breakker VS Cedric Alexander!

The Big Bad Booty Nephew has been making a case for himself ever since showing up on SmackDown, and he’s already bringing the straps down! Is he going to break PRIMED Alexander while also breaking match time records? Or will Cedric prove he’s too fly for Bron?

The bell rings and Cedric dodges Bron to CHOP and ROCK! Cedric whips, Bron reverses and Cedric handsprings, into a SPEAR!! Cover, Bron wins!

Winner: Bron Breakker, by pinfall

Well, hard to say if that’s an all-time fast match, but that was a fast match! QR Code stuff going on, but will we all see Bron take the world by storm?

 

Nick Aldis heads out.

And waiting is Tiffany Stratton. She asks if he saw what she did last week. Wait, of course he did. Because she is the Center of the Universe. She dropped Naomi and Bayley, where is her title match? Aldis tells Tiff to look at his watch. It is NOT set to #TiffyTime. And he was this close to sending her to the back of the line. But then someone convinced him otherwise, good for her. Tonight, she goes 1v1 with Naomi again, and the winner faces Bayley for the title at Backlash. Whose stupid idea was that?! Bayley says DING DONG, it was hers. It is a win-win situation here. If Naomi wins, she gets the match she got cheated out of.

And if Tiff wins, then she’ll find out when she attacks the Role Model. Tiff gasps as she has a #TiffanyEpiphany. Bayley should be ringside for that match so she can see Tiff do what Bayley couldn’t, and that’s beat Naomi. Tootles. Tiff leaves, but will the only thing she gets is to #FeelTheGlow?

 

Michelle McCool and Torrie Wilson are here!

One is a former WWE Women’s Champion, the other is a WWE Hall of Famer, but they’re both here to present Draft picks! Michelle says with the first pick of the second round, SmackDown selects… The Viper, Randy Orton! SmackDown will still have to watch out for an RKO outta nowhere! Torrie says that with the second pick of the second round, Raw selects… BRON BREAKKER! We just saw Bron make quick work of opponents here on SmackDown, but now he’s gonna be rampaging on Raw!

Michelle says that with the third pick of the second round, SmackDown selects… NIA JAX! The Irresistible Force may have to change targets from the Women’s World to the Undisputed Women’s title, but will she be unstoppable all the same? And with the fourth and final pick of this round, Raw selects… LIV MORGAN! The Revenge Tour will still be part of Monday nights, will we watch Liv rise to the top?

 

The Bloodline arrives backstage.

Paul Heyman is there to greet them and open the door to the SUV. He apologizes for not being faster about that, but Solo Sikoa asks The Bloodline if they’ve been drafted. Not yet. Then give Solo the details. Okay, well, Roman Reigns withdrew right before the show began, and then Solo keeps adding members, so no one really knows what they’re getting if they draft The Bloodline! Solo sighs, and here comes Tama Tonga. Heyman asks they be patient but Solo wants Heyman to repeat that for him. Heyman gets scared, but then KEVIN OWENS jumps in! Kevin fires off on Tama, security and refs rush in to stop it!

The Prizefighter wants Solo’s “MFT” to bring the fight like he did last week! Security still drags Kevin away, but will he get that fight he wants?

 

Kayla Braxton is on stage.

SmackDown returns and Kayla welcomes us back to the show. And please welcome out the first overall pick, Bianca Belair! The fans fire up as The EST walks out on stage, and Kayla congratulates her on being the first overall pick. But let’s talk Backlash. Breaking news, Bianca and Jade Cargill are going to challenge for the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships, against the Kabuki Warriors. How satisfying would it be to dethrone them on the stage of this magnitude? Bianca says so satisfying. She really hopes Jade gets drafted to SmackDown because given all this history with Damage CTRL, all the partners by her side, Bianca has never been the one to finally end it with them.

For everything they’ve done to her and this division, Bianca feels Jade is the perfect woman to help her end this. Now, DMG CTRL is falling apart piece by piece, and that final piece is the tag titles. So once Bianca & Jade take the gold at Backlash, the Kabuki Warriors won’t even have a reason to come back to SmackDown. But wait, they’re here now! Asuka & Kairi walk out here and Kayla moves aside. The Empress of Tomorrow and the Pirate Princess taunt the EST, but here comes The Storm! Jade makes her way to stand right by Bianca’s side. The four shout and argue, but this will be settled on May 4th!

WHOA! Tama and Kevin are brawling their way out here! The ladies move aside so the gentlemen can brawl all the way down to ringside! Tama hits low, gets in the ring, but Kevin pursues! Kevin TACKLES Tama, but Solo CLOBBERS Kevin! The fans boo as The Bloodline beats Kevin down! The refs hurry out here but clearly Solo’s Bloodline won’t listen! Tama DECKS producers, DECKS guards, HEADBUTTS them, throws hands and even THROWS the guards! Tama and Solo beat Kevin down again, but here comes Randy Orton! The Viper is still on SmackDown and he’s still pals with Kevin, so here he comes!

Orton DECKS Tama, fires hands on Solo, then RK- NO, Solo gets free and gets away! Orton wants to pursue, almost runs Jamie Noble and refs over to do it, but the Bloodline has gotten away! The fans cheer Randy on, and KAevin even hugs him! But then Kevin and Randy try to give chase! Security stops this, when and where will we see #RKKO strike down Solo and Tama?

 

The Dudley Boyz are here!

The fans fire up as Bubba Ray & D-Von are both here for the next round of picks! Cincy chants for “E C DUB! E C DUB!” Bubba and D-Von look at the cards, it’s hard to read. So out come the glasses! Bubba says with the first pick of the third round of the 2024 WWE Draft, SmackDown selects… L A KNIGHT! YEAH!! The Mega Star stays on Fridays! D-Von says with the second pick of the third round, Raw selects… RICOCHET! Mondays still has the One and Only, is Ricochet going to bring that WWE Speed Championship home to Raw, too?

Bubba says with the third pick of the third round, SmackDown selects… THE BLOODLINE! That means Solo Sikoa, Tama Tonga and Paul Heyman are staying right here on Friday nights. And D-Von says with the final pick of this round, Raw selects… SHEAMUS! The Celtic Warrior just got back, but he won’t have to worry about going anywhere else but Monday nights.

 

WWE Women’s Championship #1 Contender’s Match: Naomi VS Tiffany Stratton!

It’s time to run it back once again! The Glow got robbed by the Spoiled Rich Girl, but supposedly, it’s #TiffyTime. Will Naomi prove there’s no such time on the clock? Or will Bayley be the one feeling the Backlash over giving Tiffany one more chance?

The bell rings and Naomi hits a THESZ PRESS! Naomi rains down fists, Tiffy shoves her away and goes to ropes, but Naomi gets up in Tiff’s face. Naomi whips, Tiff holds ropes to bail out and fans boo. Naomi scowls, runs in and WRECKS Tiff with a dropkick! Naomi then gets Tiff up, SMACKS her off the apron, and then SMACKS her off it again! And again! Naomi puts Tiff in, goes up a corner, but Tiff gets under the jump! Naomi runs back up but Tiff YANKS her into ropes! Tiff runs to HIP ATTACK! Naomi sputters, Tiff scowls and drags Naomi up, to then put through ropes. But Naomi RAMS into Tiff!

Naomi reels Tiff in, for a HEATSEEKER! Tiff flops to the floor, and then Naomi SPLIT LEG DROPS! Naomi says it’s #NaomiTime, but SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and Naomi runs, but into a SPINEBUSTER! High stack, TWO! Naomi survives and Tiff is frustrated but the fans rally up. Tiff drags Naomi up, whips her to a corner, but Naomi goes up and sunset flips! TWO! Tiff escapes, knees Naomi low, then whips. Naomi slides under the lariat to then mule kick! Then she headscissor SPIKES Tiff down! Cover, TWO! Tiff survives but barely, and Naomi keeps her cool. Naomi headlocks, but Tiff shoves her into buckles! Tiff runs, but Naomi follows, DOUBLE RUNNING FACEBUSTERS take them both down! The fans fire up as the two rise!

Naomi KICKS, ROCKS and ROCKS Tiff again! Naomi fires shots again and again but Tiff knees low! Tiff reels Naomi in, but Naomi wrenches out to ENZIGIRI! And then BUCKLE BULLDOG! But then NIA JAX attacks Bayley!? Nia SMACKS Bayley off buckles, rains down fists, and this momentarily distracts Naomi. Naomi refocuses, but by now, Tiff’s slipped away! Nia KICKS Bayley in the side, so Naomi goes out to ROCK her! Nia POSTS Naomi and that throws the match out!

No Contest

The fans boo as Nia ruins the fun, then runs Bayley over! Nia smiles as she blows kisses to Cincy. Tiff smiles, she drags Naomi up and puts her in the ring. Then she drags Bayley in! Tiff wants a repeat of last week as she puts them side by side in the drop zone! Tiff then goes up and up for the PRETTIEST MOONSAULT EVER!! Tiff says it’s her time, but the #1 contendership is still in question. Who gets their shot at the Role Model at Backlash?

 

B-Fab and the Street Profits meet up backstage.

Angelo Dawkins has a “WHO-DEY” sign, but Montez Ford is wondering where Bobby Lashley is right now. B-Fab says calm down, he’ll be here. Byron Saxton walks over and apologizes for interrupting. He doesn’t know what the Draft destination for this group will be until Monday Night Raw, but we do know that The Profits will challenge A-Town Down Under for the WWE Tag Team Championships. YESSIIIIIIR~! B-Fab says it doesn’t matter where they get drafted. The Profits are going to take down A-Town Down Under and take those titles. Then they’ll have their first class tickets right back to SmackDown.

SmackDown? Did someone say SmackDown~? In walk Austin Theory & Grayson Waller, showing off the titles. And Theory says you can’t have SmackDown without the GREATEST undefeated tag team of all time. And sorry, Dawkins, but these are championships, something the Bengals know nothing about! B-Fab keeps Dawkins back, but then in steps Bobby Lashley! The All Mighty scares Theory & Waller right off, and Dawkins says see y’all next Friday! Will there be nothing keeping these Profits down the night before Backlash?

 

The Final Testament speaks.

Karrion Kross says good evening. What’s going on here? You guessed it! More random acts of violence! Just follow him. Kross & Scarlett lead the way to show The Authors of Pain beating down New Catch Republic! Rezar beats down Pete Dunne while Akam victimizes Tyler Bate! Paul Ellering says they will know about sacrifice! Kross says whether they get drafted to Raw or stay on SmackDown, the violence will continue until they get what they want! So sayeth The Final Testament!!

 

Teddy Long and JBL are here!

The Hall of Famer General Manager and the Hall of Famer WWE Champion are both here, ready to give us the fourth and final round of picks tonight! Teddy gets right to it! The first pick of the fourth round, SmackDown selects… AJ STYLES! The Phenomenal One is really an obvious choice, because one way or another, the WWE Championship stays with SmackDown! JBL says the second pick of the fourth round, Raw selects… THE ALPHA ACADEMY! Raw keeps Chad Gable, Otis, Maxxine Dupri & Akira Tozawa, A THANK YEW~!

Teddy says with the third pick of this round, SmackDown selects… ANDRADE! A big move as now El Idolo will be part of Friday nights. And with the final pick of this fourth round, Raw selects… NXT’S Kiana James! The Calculator, the former NXT Women’s Tag Team Champion, has the Raw hat to put on, and after a quick hype package, Jackie Redmond is there to interview her. Kiana, congratulations! You are heading to Monday Night Raw! How much does this mean to her? This means the world to her. She is filled with gratitude, but also knows every decision she has made up to this point has been by design to get her here.

Kiana is so proud of her time in NXT, but she’s ready to show Raw why she is the One Percent. Was she surprised? Of course she was! HBK is here to wish her luck and congratulations. Is Kiana going to start the hostile takeover of the Raw Women’s Division?

 

Backstage interview with Nick Aldis.

Kayla is with the SmackDown GM and says that with night one in the books, how does he feel about SmackDown’s selections? He feels really good about them. SmackDown’s future is bright, he can’t wait for the new recruits to show up and show out for the blue brand. But he also wants to turn attentions to Backlash, because he’s got some new matches to announce! The first PLE in France, this is exciting stuff, Kayla. Aldis says that the WWE Women’s Championship will now be on the line in a Triple Threat! Bayley VS Naomi VS Tiffany Stratton! Will the odds make it that much harder for the Role Model to succeed?

There’s one more match to announce, but Aldis will let the GM GOAT take it from here. Teddy Long steps in, and don’t forget. We’ll talk about this tag team match. The Bloodline VS Kevin Owens & Randy Orton! Holla, players. Solo & Tama will have to face The Viper and the Prizefighter, will #RKKO strike fast and strike hard?

 

Cody Rhodes VS Carmelo Hayes!

The American Nightmare just put pen to paper for his match with the Phenomenal One, but he isn’t one to shy away from a challenge. The former NXT Champion is shooting his shot, but will this be nothing but net? Or will it be a frustrating airball?

The bell rings and the two circle. They tie up, the fans rally for Cody as he puts Melo in a corner then arm-drags him away. Melo runs up, Cody headlocks, Melo powers out then drops. Melo hurdles, but Cody kicks low to RHODES UPPERCUT! Melo staggers to ropes, the fans fire up, but then melo throat chops and springboard FLYING LARIATS! Melo says that’s why he’s a first round pick! But then Cody CLOBBERS him! Cody asks if Melo’s ready for this, and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns once again and Cody has a headlock. Cody hits a takeover, Melo flails and kicks around, but Cody grinds him down. Melo pushes with his forearm, then headscissors, but Cody kips free. Melo CHOPS, the fans “WOO~!” but Cody brushes himself off. Melo pie faces Cody! Cody fires forearms on Melo, then whips, but Melo reverses. Melo ELBOWS Cody, then runs up to KICK him in the side! Melo fires forearms and CHOPS in a corner, then throws body shots. Melo digs his boot in, the ref counts, and Cody goes to another corner. Cody eggs Melo on, Melo storms up, but Cody puts him in the corner to CHOP!

Cody swings, Melo dodges and CHOPS! Cody turns things around to CHOP! The fans rally, Cody whips corner to corner, then he back drops Melo away! Melo staggers up, Cody runs, and he rallies on Melo with forearms! Cody goes up and over in a corner but Melo tilt-o-whirls, LA MYSTICA! Melo springboards, FADE AWAY! Cover, TWO! Cody survives that flying DDT, but we see the NXT roster all fired up watching Melo take it to the champ. Melo sits Cody up, drags him into a facelock, but the fans rally for Cody. Cody fireman’s carries but Melo slips free to dragon sleeper! Melo grins, but Cody cradles! TWO!!

Melo swings, Cody boots, then Cody springboards to BEAUTIFUL DISASTER! Melo flips inside-out, Cody covers, TWO! Melo is still in this and he snarls up at Cody. Melo gives a forearm, Cody gives it back, and the fans rally up. Cody scoops Melo, storms around, and then hits a RUNNING POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO! Melo survives and Cody grows frustrated. Cody pounds the mat, the fans rally up, and then Cody goes to ropes. Cody springboards again, CODY CUTTER! Cover, TWO!! Melo survives yet again, proving why he’s a former NXT Champion, on top of NXT North American Champion! But then Cody drags him up!

Cody back suplexes, Melo lands out of it, then FIRST 48! Doe goes Cody and Melo goes up! Melo is setting up for the game winner! NOTHING BUT- NO, Cody avoids the flying leg drop! Melo rolls through, Cody dodges to SUPERKICK! Cody brings Melo around, but Melo gets free! They both run, both springboard, but completely miss each other, and Cody takes a rough landing! Melo drags Cody up, reels him in, but Cody wrenches out to dragon sleeper! CROSS RHODES!! Cody shakes out the bad arm but still makes the cover, and Cody wins!

Winner: Cody Rhodes, by pinfall

Melo took his shot but it was blocked! Even so, Cody sits Melo up to show him respect and tell him he’s still the future. But did this match end up more of a trap game for Cody after that crash landing? Or will he be alright in time for Backlash and his phenomenal opponent?

Speaking of, Styles sneaks right into the ring! Cody sees him in time and Styles stays back. Cody and Styles stare down, but Styles says it was that close. Styles offers a handshake, and Cody takes it. There’s still respect here, for now. But will nothing stop Styles from turning Cody’s story into a tragedy after all?


My Thoughts:

A great SmackDown to open the WWE Draft but to also set up Backlash. To recap, SmackDown took Bianca, Melo, Orton, Nia, LA Knight, The Bloodline, Styles and Andrade while Raw took Jey, Rollins, Bron, Liv, Ricochet, Sheamus, The Alpha Academy, and Kiana. Many of those choices made sense, as picks won’t be wasted on keeping champions on brands, and just need to be used to keep most stories alive and change up a few others. Kiana is perhaps one of the more surprising moves, but well-deserved. She has been a solid character and solid in-ring performer almost from the start, she’s a solid addition to Raw.

Bron of course demolished his opponent tonight, it’s just a shame it was Cedric and not local enhancement talent. But Bron will also be a good addition to Raw, but maybe he can move past his squash match phase and get right to story. Melo being a first round pick was great stuff, and he had a great promo with Cody to give us tonight’s main event. That double springboard whiff was definitely a timing problem, but at the same time, a Fade Away countered into a Cody Cutter would’ve been way too epic just for TV. Cody with a great win, and we got a really good contract signing segment, but you can bet Cody retains.

Really good tag match from LWO VS Legado but naturally Rey & Dragon won. I knew it was only a matter of time before Carlito was outed, and how he handled being exposed was pretty good. And with Andrade being drafted to SmackDown, you just know that means Andrade joins the LWO. The Final Testament attacking New Catch Republic was a wild moment, I almost thought Ellering was going to use the pliers in his hands to grab at fingers. Maybe we get that next week for SmackDown in France. Good promos from A-Town Down Under and the still technically unnamed faction of Bobby Lashley’s. As great as The Profits are, it feels like Theory & Waller will cheat to retain.

Really good promo with Tiff and Bayley to set up Naomi VS Tiff round 3, but I did not think Nia Jax would disrupt all that. A Triple Threat at Backlash is good stuff, it will protect Bayley if she loses, but can also protect Naomi and Tiff if Bayley uses them against each other to win. Good promo from Bianca that then turned into the shouting match of Bianca & Jade with Kabuki Warriors. Their tag title match is official, and I’m pretty sure Bianca & Jade win. I also liked that this segment ended up having Kevin and Tama brawl right through it. Orton saving Kevin was a great move, RKKO VS Solo & Tama is going to be awesome stuff, I can’t wait to see it.

My Score: 8.8/10


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 4.25.2024

We just got done with Rebellion, and Under Siege is two weeks away! Gotta see how these dots connect!

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Rebellion had quite a few returns, Mike Santana, Sami Callihan and Broken Matt Hardy. All three of these guys could easily be main event players, and its nice to mix up and expand what felt like a rather small pool of potential challengers.

Under Siege is only like 2 weeks out, so we’ll see how the dots connect in such a short period of time.

Ratings:

  • Mike Santana vs Myron Reed w/Trey Miguel & Zachary Wentz: Santana wins via Spin the Block – ** 1/2
  • #1 Contender: Frankie Kazarian vs Josh Alexander: Josh wins via Grapevine Ankle Lock – ***
  • ASH by Elegance vs Xia Brookside: Xia wins via School Girl Roll-Up – ** 3/4
  • Sami Callihan vs The Good Hands: Sami Callihan wins via Cactus Driver ’97 – SQUASH
  • Eddie Edwards w/Alisha Edwards & Brian Myers vs Nic Nemeth: Eddie wins via Boston Knee Party – *** 1/4

Results:

A weird opening that is just framed to put Nemeth and Hardy together against The System. Feels a little awkward, but who knows how it will play out. 

Mike Santana vs Myron Reed w/Trey Miguel & Zachary Wentz

Ahh I didn’t really pay attention to Santana’s theme at Rebellion, but its pretty damn cool. Good stuff. 

Rascalz blindside Santana early, but the heel advantage doesn’t last more than a few moves. Santana whips Myron from corner to corner, hits a few Hip Attacks before Myron finally dodges one and starts using his unique offense and agility to his advantage. Matrix dodge, into an Leaping Outside Back in Slingshot Codebreaker. Some more offense and Santana powders to the ramp, Myron jumps over the rope and tries a Flying Cutter, but Santana blocks it, turns things around, gets pushed forward and hits the Rolling Cutter. Santana takes out the Rascalz, heads back into the ring, Myron tries to catch him unawares but eats the Spin the Block off the rope run! Santana wins fairly quickly.

Maclin’s music hits, he tries to employ the help of The Rascalz to attack Santana, but as soon as Maclin positions himself to get in, The Rascalz bail and flip off Maclin. Maclin makes it out of the confrontation relatively unscathed, but at least we know where he’s going for Under Siege probably.

OH FUCK ME WITH RUSTY KNIVES. Because Cardona is hurt Kon is paired with SDL, and she just challenges Jordynne and PCO to a tag match. WHY!? STOP IT. This is hot garbage. 

Josh Alexander comes out…I wonder who’s Super Finisher he’s gonna conveniently kick out this time? Brian Myers? Frankie Kazarian? Rich Swann? Because yes, I’m still annoyed that Hammerstone has been in TNA for half a sandwich, he already connects with a Super version of his finish on tacks, and that’s not a finish. Oh Kaz’s music hits. Okay, so time for Josh to kick out of Fade to Black or Flux Capacitor. Kaz talks smack, says he won his match too so he should have a say in who’s number one contender. Josh challenges him, Kaz says not right now, but a referee runs out and says the match is official. 

#1 Contender: Frankie Kazarian vs Josh Alexander

Kaz throws his jacket on Josh’s head, and attacks him with some strikes before Josh fights back and throws Kaz out. Commercial break, we see Kaz misses his Apron Guillotine, Josh goes for the Low Crossbody but Kaz dodges and Josh goes flying. Kaz starts throwing some chops and claws at the cauliflowered ears of Josh. Russian Leg Sweep from Kaz for a near fall. Josh swings wildly and Kaz ducks the strike and levels Josh with a Lariat.

Josh blocks a Vertical Suplex attempt, but Frankie pulls off a Fisherman’s Suplex after a few overhead strikes for a near fall. Josh stands up and connects with a straight right, rocks Kaz, Back Body Drop, into a Charging Forearm, Rolling Senton, 2 count! C4 Spike attempt countered into a Back Stabber and then Chicken Wing, but Josh fights it off, rolls through and into an Ankle Lock, Kaz kicks off and into a Head and Arm Cradle for a near fall and then the Guillotine Leg Drop into Slingshot DDT spot from Kaz for another 2 count!

Fade to Black, but its fought off, Big Boot but then Kaz counters the next move with a Power Slam into the Springboard Guillotine Leg Drop, but Josh grabs the Ankle Lock! Locomotion German Suplex time from Josh, Halfhatch Suplex after the Germans, floats over for a 2 count! C4 Spike attempt again, but Kaz fights it off, dumps him over the top rope, slingshots him in and into the Cutter for a near fall for Kaz! After the 2 Kaz grabs a chair and chain, the referee stops the chair of course, so he tries the chain, EY runs down and grabs the chain so Kaz pulls the Eddie Guerrero and the referee admonishes EY, but doesn’t DQ Josh. So as Kaz is busy laughing at EY, Josh picks the ankle, Ankle Lock with the Grapevine, Kaz taps.

ASH by Elegance vs Xia Brookside

Both are jawing at each other and then throw hands before Xia gets the upper hand with a Headscissors from the Top Turnbuckle, Charging Knees, a Flurry of Kicks, but when the ref forces some space in the corner, ASH is finally able to dodge and work over Xia with her Twisting Body Splash, a few choking moves, a corner Stomp into a Snap Suplex for 2. ASH is in charge elegantly, but the referee keeps forcing space on both of them when they go for corner attacks. Xia manages to take advantage a little, but ASH regains control, kicks Xia up the ramp and then lands her Cartwheel Back Elbow up the ramp. It actually looks pretty cool executed like that.

Headlocks and Hair Pulling to keep Xia down and using energy to kick out. ASH is getting frustrated but Xia is remaining persistent. ASH goes back to the Headlock, but Xia fights up, Jawbreaker, Back Elbow, Kick to the gut and Drop Toe Hold sends ASH face first into the middle buckle. Xia rips off 4 Double Knee Smashes to the back of ASH’s head into her Flying Crossbody for a close 2! Xia pulls her up, but ASH spins out, then Xia slips it, but ASH kicks her in the chest and deposits her to the outside and demands a count from the referee. Iceman puts Jeweled Knuckles/Rings on ASH’s hand, the referee catches her, removes the stuff from her fingers and Xia hits the School Girl Roll-Up for the flash win.

Sami Callihan vs The Good Hands

So the Good Hand Jobs are about to do their job to Sami. I’m just gonna assume Sami beats the hell out of both and wins with a Cactus Driver ’97. If anything interesting happens I might actually cover it, but come on now.

Kaz makes a Metallica reference with the “Wash Your Back So You Won’t Stab Mine”…and Sweet Amber is the only good song on St. Anger. So…I ain’t mad.

Eddie Edwards w/Alisha Edwards & Brian Myers vs Nic Nemeth

A little early ground wrestling and headlocks for control from both men. Nothing super flashy to start until we get to the rope run and Nemeth goes for the Flying Body Press to drop Eddie. Before Nemeth can follow up, Lish grabs his foot. Nic does have his brother Ryan in the crowd, trying to get chants going and do the old school ‘power up the babyface’ thing, but Eddie has been in control since Lish got involved. Simple offense, chokes, strikes, Snap Suplexes, Knee Drops, simple yet effective. But then Eddie ducks his head too early, Nemeth kicks him in the face, bounces his head off the buckles a few times, Dropkick sends Eddie reeling to the corner, Nemeth starts the 10 Count Punches but Myers hits the apron to distract and Eddie manages to slip the situation and push Nemeth to the floor.

Commercial break happens, Nemeth is trying to fight back with Chops, but a Kitchen Sink from Eddie puts Nemeth on the floor again! Clubbing blow from Eddie, but Eddie then misses the Hip Attack in the corner and Nemeth counters with the Rude Awakening into the 10 Count Rain of Elbows. Fame Ass-er miss, Eddie tries something but Nemeth turns it into that hesitation DDT for 2! Tuning up the band starts to build and Eddie powders to avoid it. Nemeth throws Eddie back in, goes to the top, but Eddie crotches him, rises up and hits the Superplex into Tiger Driver for 2! Eddie starts mocking with Tuning Up the band but Nemeth hits his own Superkick into an Olympic Slam for 2!

Both men just trade strikes Fighting Spirit style, Eddie says “Always Trust the System” and Nemeth shuts him up with a Headbutt. Danger Zone is blocked, Boston Knee Party gets ducked, they level each other with Lariats! Myers and Ryan Nemeth start fighting to distract the referee, Moose hits the ring and hits Nemeth with the belt. Eddie lands Boston Knee Party and The System wins again!

 

Overall Score: 6/10

A lame opening segment, a squash match, ASH by Elegance getting her first loss, and a weird way of just pulling the number one contender out of mid air makes for an awkward show. Also Kon still be involved in, literally anything, is negative. However, I can say there was a ton of stuff thrown at the wall this episode, so there’s a chance that some things landed better with other people than myself. The ballot segments were amusing, they overused the “I need to talk to you Santino” gimmick a bit much and personally I feel like having Jake versus Hammerstone is booking yourself into a weird corner.

But hey, the main event was fun, Nemeth getting laid out to the point that there could be a story reason to take him out of the Under Siege match. Kaz with the Metallica reference was pop worthy and I guess its a lot of ‘let’s see where it goes’ kind of angle creation. So it wasn’t complete trash, but its definitely a wait and see episode.


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