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Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu Results & Report! (5/1/22)




HPW ThunderStruck

The Legend of Zelda: The Ring of Destiny, Chapter 29

It’s raining, it’s pouring, but no one is snoring! HPW debuts ThunderStruck, and BLOOD & THUNDER! Who survives to reign as HPW Trios Champions?


  • HPW Death Mountain Championship: Tali w/ Shabonne VS Torbevito; Tali wins and retains the title.
  • Fused Shadow on the line: Ghirahim VS Midna; Midna wins and gains another Fused Shadow.
  • Trios Match: The Dark Forces VS The UnderWorld Order; The uWo wins, ReDead joins the HPW Triforce Championship match.
  • HPW Termina Championship: Fin Balure w/ The Young Ducks VS Igos du Ikana; Balure wins and retains the title.
  • HPW Trios Championship Blood & Thunder: The Desert Flowers VS Forged By Violence VS Ganondorf, Zant & Agahnim; Ganondorf, Zant & Aghanim win and become the new HPW Trios Champions.


HPW and HXS TV set the scene!

Hyrule’s stormiest region is the perfect location for a tumultuous Trios Division! The Desert Flowers were facing Ganondorf, Zant and Agahnim, only for Iron Knuckle and the Dark Nuts to go after the Gerudo Ace for revenge! That made Forged By Violence enemies of Riju, Aveil & Buliara, and now all three teams fight for the gold in the first-ever BLOOD & THUNDER! Three teams in two rings and a double cage, who will more or less survive the steel and bring the titles home with them?

Plus, so many other prizes are on the line! The Dame of the Dunes defends the Death Mountain title against the Son of the Whirlpool, the Zora Rock ‘n’ Rolla looks to keep the Termina title from the Ruler of Ruin, and in a rematch from earlier this year, the Living Blade dangles another of the Twilight Princess’ Fused Shadows in front of her. Will Torbevito make his father proud? Will Igos du Ikana take back the belt he brought to HPW? And will Midna be one step closer to re-releasing her true power? HPW ThunderStruck starts now!


HPW Death Mountain Championship: Tali w/ Shabonne VS Torbevito!

The Dame of the Dunes made four challengers compete in a Ladder match, and she still felt the need to tip the scales against the underdog! But the Son of the Whirlpool still came out the winner, and now he has his shot! Can Torbevito climb up Death Mountain and stand atop it? Or will Tali send him tumbling back down to the bottom?

The introductions are made, but Shabonne does the one for Tali. “Sav’saaba, vai and voe! Your opening contest for this evening won’t even be a contest! This is going to be a swift, one-sided, and almost uncomfortable-to-watch display of dominance! The Dame of the Dunes is going to make lightwork of this lightweight, and then we’re gonna celebrate! Sa’oten, baby!” Shabonne exits the ring, the belt is raised, and we see if Torbevito can topple Tali!

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Fans rally and duel, “TOR-BE-VI-TO!” “SA-O-TEN!” as the two circle. They approach, but then Tali mocks Torbevito with the difference in height by holding the knuckle lock way up over his head. Torbevito tries to reach up, but then Tali pie faces him. Shabonne laughs and Tali grins arrogantly while fans boo. Torbevito kicks but Tali blocks and grins more. Tali spins Torbevito but Torbevito DRAGON WHIPS! Tali staggers and fans let out an “OHH~!” Tali scowls, swings on Torbevito but he dodges and runs the ropes. Torbevito tilt-o-whirls, but Tali uses power to block the DDT! Tali then OVERHEAD suplexes Torbevito!

Torbevito tumbles to a corner and fans marvel at the showing of strength! Tali flexes and Shabonne says, “The Dame of Dunes! Big Mama Muscles! Ain’t no whirlpools in the desert!” Tali storms over to Torbevito and stands him up. Tali CLUBS him in the chest, then stands him up again to whip him corner to corner hard! Torbevito bounces off buckles and hits the mat! Tali flexes again then taunts Torbevito to get up. Fans rally and Torbevito gets up, only for Tali to run in and RAM him into the corner! Tali RAMS her shoulder in again and the ref reprimands. The ref counts, Tali picks Torbevito up and hits a SPINEBUSTER! High stack, TWO!

Tali looms over Torbevito and smirks. Tali gives toying kicks and fans duel again, “TOR-BE-VI-TO!” “SA-O-TEN!” Torbevito flounders to ropes but Tali stalks him. Tali stands Torbevito up to ROCK with a forearm, then whips, but Torbevito reverses to go up and around Tali, WHIRL- NO! Tali tosses Torbevito away! Shabonne shouts, “What’d I just say? Ain’t no whirlpools in-” Torbevito ENZIGURIS Tali! Tali staggers to ropes, Torbevito runs in and uses the ropes again, but Tali follows through on the spin to stay up! Tali slows it down, goes over another overhead throw, but Torbevito makes it a BLOCKBUSTER! Cover, TWO!

Fans fire up as Torbevito stands up and staggers about. Tali sits up and shakes her head, but Torbevito KICKS her in the back. Tali scowls and gets up to her feet. She glares at Torbevito, then BOOTS him to ropes! Torbevito rebounds, Tali pops him up to a fireman’s carry! GORON DROP! Cover, TWO! Tali grows annoyed now but Shabonne coaches her to keep going since she has the lead. Tali drags Torbevito up again, holds him up by his chin, and SLAPS him! Torbevito drops to his knees, fans rally up, and Tali gives him another toying kick, but to the back of his head. Fans duel, “TOR-BE-VI-TO!” “SA-O-TEN!” as Tali gives him another kick.

Fans keep dueling, Tali kicks him a little harder, but Torbevito gets up and huffs and puffs. Fans rally up again and he glares back at Tali. Tali talks trash, “Ohhh, you all hard now?!” Tali SLAPS Torbevito again! Torbevito enziguris but Tali ducks it this time! Tali waistlocks, Torbevito resists the lift, throws elbows, but then Tali lets him slip around. Tali then squeezes on a BEARHUG! Torbevito endures as Tali thrashes him around! Fans rally and duel, Torbevito throws elbows over and over and over! Tali shoves him away, Torbevito rebounds again, pop-up SATELLITE DDT! Torbevito turns things around on Tali!

Fans fire up even more while both Tali and Torbevito are down! Shabonne is getting upset and she shouts for Tali to get up. But Torbevito kips up! Fans fire up with Torbevito, and he gets a running start for a SHOOTING STAR PRESS! Cover, TWO! Torbevito basement dropkicks Tali back down and then hurries to the apron. Fans fire up as Torbevito aims. He seems a bit nervous, but he still SPRINGBOARD SHOOTING STARS! Torbevito sputters from that landing and fans lose their minds over what they just saw! Torbevito crawls to the cover, TWO!! Torbevito is shocked as Tali sits up! Tali clutches her ribs, but so does Torbevito.

Fans are thunderous now as Torbevito gets to a corner. Tali gets up, the two glare at each other, and the two rush each other! Torbevito swings around Tali’s clothesline, but Tali holds off the crucifix takedown with strength! Tali pops Torbevito up to an Electric Chair, but Torbevito swings around to RANA TAKEDOWN! It’s a cover, TWO!! Shabonne is greatly relieved, but then Tali runs into a drop toehold! Tali ends up on ropes, Torbevito runs the ropes! TIGER FEINT KICK! Tali goes down and fans fire up as Torbevito climbs a corner! FROG SPLASH!! Cover, but Shabonne’s on the apron! Fans boo and the ref tells her to get down!

Torbevito is furious and he shouts at Shabonne, too. Shabonne tells him to shut up but she still gets off the apron. Torbevito hurries back to the corner and climbs again, but Tali CLUBS him on the back! And then CLUBS him again! Tali drags Torbevito off the corner into the shoulder rack, for a DOMINATOR!! Cover, Tali wins!

Winner: Tali, by pinfall (still HPW Death Mountain Champion)

Well, give Shabonne the assist, but it seems that’s what a manager is for. She and Tali celebrate together in the ring, but how long will Tali last when she needs help against even an underdog?


Backstage interview with the Dark Forces.

Irene says there’s a lot on the line in their Trios Match tonight, but um, where’s Gibdo? Isn’t he supposed to be in the match tonight? Cia says yes he is, but they haven’t seen him all day! What will they do if he doesn’t show up before the match? Obviously Cia will have to step up in his place. She is NOT letting the uWo weasel their way into the title match. Kage earned his opportunity fair and square, only he gets to face Link. Will the Dark Forces have no choice but to go on without #DatGibdo?

Fused Shadow on the line: Ghirahim VS Midna!

The Living Blade, the Demon Lord, and an otherwise short tempered narcissist, Ghirahim was upset that the Twilight Princess had all the spotlight. He took her prized possessions and only gave one of them back last time! Will Midna get another piece of her Fused Shadow crown back? Or will Ghirahim continue to string her along and steal her spotlight?

To make sure Midna doesn’t attack Ghirahim like last time, her entrance is first. As Ghirahim makes his entrance, he wears the Fused Shadow to mock Midna. She wants after Ghirahim right away but the ref keeps her back. Introductions are made, Ghirahim hands the piece over for the ref to hold it up, and the difference between 33% and 66% is on the line!

Fans rally up as the two circle. They approach, tie up, and Ghirahim headlocks. Midna throws elbows and body shots, then uppercuts! Midna goes to run, but Ghirahim grabs her hair! The ref reprimands and counts, but Midna headbutts low! Midna jumps up for a flying-mare, then she pushes Ghirahim down for a SENTON! Cover, TWO! Midna watches Ghirahim get up, and she jumps on for a SLEEPER HOLD! Ghirahim gets to a corner and the ref calls for a ropebreak. Midna lets go, but then jumps up to CLAW Ghirahim’s back! The ref reprimands but Midna headbutts low again.

Midna whips but Ghirahim blocks. Ghirahim whips Midna into the corner, then scoops her on the rebound for a SIDEWALK SLAM! Cover, TWO! Ghirahim drags Midna up just to CLUB her down! And again, and again! Fans boo as Ghirahim wraps on a chinlock. Ghirahim leans on the hold but Midna endures. Fans rally up, Ghirahim thrashes Midna, but she still endures. Midna moves around, but Ghirahim shifts from chinlock to BULLY CHOKE! Midna endures while fans rally harder! Ghirahim cranks the hold but Midna manages to scoot back and gets a ROPEBREAK with her tiny foot! Fans cheer but then boo as Ghirahim holds until 4.

Ghirahim lets Midna go and waits for her to get up. Fans rally behind Midna as she sputters and stands up. Ghirahim then BOOTS her down! Fans boo but Ghirahim soaks up the heat as he laughs and looms over Midna. He deadlift suplexes her, just like last time, and also holds her up. But Midna fights that to get a cradle! TWO!! Even Ghirahim is shocked he escaped! He checks with the ref, and yes, he got out before three. But then Midna dropkicks Ghirahim into a corner! Fans fire up and Midna runs corner to corner, to CANNONBALL! Then she runs corner to corner for a BRONCO BUSTER! Midna then drags Ghirahim to a cover, TWO!

Midna wraps on another SLEEPER! Fans rally up as Ghirahim endures. Ghirahim reaches out, fights his way up, but Midna hops on as a backpack! Midna thrashes and shakes around and Ghirahim starts to fade! But then he drops back for a BACKPACK SENTON! Ghirahim coughs and sputters and drags himself up with the ropes. Ghirahim snarls and stomps Midna over and over! Fans boo but Ghirahim tells them to shut up. Ghirahim drags Midna up and shouts at her, “You don’t deserve the spotlight! I deserve the spotlight!” Ghirahim then ROCKS Midna with a forearm, runs and springboards, but FLOPS as Midna dodges!

Fans fire up as Midna drops another SENTON! Fans rally more as Midna hurries to a corner. Midna climbs to the top, but Ghirahim CHOPS her! Midna wobbles up top and almost falls! But Ghirahim sits her back up, then throws hands. Ghirahim climbs up to join Midna, then he scoops her up. Ghirahim laughs while fans anticipate what he’s up to! SUPER BACKFLIP POWERSLAM!! Fans lose their minds while Ghirahim covers, TWO?!? Ghirahim is furious and he argues with the ref, but the count is the count! Ghirahim stomps around angrily, then waistlocks for a deadlift GERMAN SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO!!

Fans are thunderous as Midna survives again! Ghirahim is shrieking with anger! Ghirahim goes to a corner and demands Midna get back up! Midna slowly gets up, Ghirahim leaps up, SUPER GHIRA- NO! Midna catches Ghirahim for a FLYING NECKBREAKER!! Fans are losing their minds again and Midna hurries up top! TWISTED TWILIGHT! Cover, Midna wins!!

Winner: Midna, by pinfall (gains another Fused Shadow)

The Twilight Princess wins and has another piece of her crown back! Then she gets a mic and stands over Ghirahim. “You’re going to give me my last piece of Fused Shadow, you argyle loving fiend! Wherever HPW goes in June, you and I are settling this!” Fans fire up for that one! Will Ghirahim give Midna that final Fused Shadow? Or will he do everything he can to avoid losing the spotlight?


Trios Match: The Dark Forces VS The UnderWorld Order!

Kage won the Triforce Tournament and has earned a title shot at the HPW Triforce Championship. Hollywood ReDead brutalized Link with a chair and thinks he gets a title shot. Though this is 3v3, the difference between 1v1 and 1v1v1 hangs in the balance! Will Kage, Volga and now Cia make sure things stay as planned? Or will ReDead, Death Sword and Gomess make sure their brand of darkness encroaches on that title match?

The uWo make their entrance second, and they have Ted Beedle Ossi with them, and wait! Is that Gibdo?! Gibdo’s now sporting the uWo colors of black ‘n’ white! Cia is losing her cool already that another member of the Dark Forces has betrayed them! Volga and Wizzro calm her down as the uWo gets in the ring. Wait, ReDead stays on the outside with Beedle? Is Gibdo taking ReDead’s place in this match? Cia gets a mic to shout, “Are you kidding me?! Gibdo, you’re betraying us?! And you can’t take ReDead’s place in this match, this is about him joining the title match!” ReDead gets a mic while on the outside to respond.

“Oh, I’m sorry, was there a line in some contract saying the uWo had to be just me, Death Sword and Gomess? Million Rupee Man, you were there, right? Did Hook say anything about that?” Beedle says no, only that the uWo was competing for the spot. “Well there you have it! Gibdo’s in the uWo, and if the uWo wins, I’m in!” ReDead laughs and it seems the Dark Forces has no choice! Will they still be able to keep the HPW Triforce Championship match as Link VS Kage? Or will this new betrayal derail everything?

The trios sort out, and Gibdo starts for the uWo. Cia wants to start, but Kage insists. Cia allows it, and fans rally up, “Oh~ let’s go, Dark Forrr~ces! Oh~, let’s go, Dark Fo-or-ce-es!” Kage and Gibdo circle, approach, and tie up. Kage knees low, then throws more knees, then CHOPS Gibdo. Gibdo goes to ropes and Kage ROCKS him with a forearm! Kage whips but Gibdo holds ropes to stop himself. Kage rushes over, Gomess tags in and Gibdo puts Kage on the apron. Kage ROCKS Gibdo, but then Gomess trips Kage off the apron! Gomess whips Kage hard into railing! Fans boo as Gibdo DECKS Volga and Gomess stomps Kage!

Death Sword also gets in, he distracts the ref while Gomess uses camera cables to choke Kage! The ref still manages to see that and he reprimands the uWo. Gomess lets off and gets in the ring, but now he distracts the ref so ReDead can stomp Kage! ReDead gets away with that but fans still boo. Gomess goes back out to drag Kage up and into the ring. Gomess stomps Kage into the uWo corner, then digs his boots in. The ref counts, Gomess lets off and tags Death Sword. They drag Kage up to double whip, then body shot, knee lift, and LARIAT! Death Sword covers, TWO! Fans rally up for Kage but Death Sword clamps on a chinlock.

Death Sword grinds Kage down, leans on the hold, but Kage endures. Kage fights up, throws body shots, and goes to run, but Death Sword pulls his hair! The ref reprimands, Kage back elbows Death Sword, wrenches an arm and HOOK SHOTS! Death Sword wobbles, Kage puts him in the Dark Forces corner. Volga tags in and they mug Death Sword. Volga KICKS Death Sword in the leg and Death Sword goes along the ropes. Volga KICKS him again, and has Death Sword in another corner. Volga whips Death Sword corner to corner, runs in, but Death Sword pops Volga up and gets a fireman’s carry!

Volga slips off to waistlock, but Death Sword throws him off! Death Sword boots but Volga ducks under! Volga goes up the corner and CROSSBODIES! Direct hit and Volga covers, TWO! Volga hurries and gets a toehold. Death Sword kicks at Volga with the free leg and sends him way. Death Sword and Volga stand off and fans rally. They reset, feel out the grapple, but Death Sword gets around to waistlock and SLAM Volga down. Death Sword drops an elbow on Volga’s back, then Death Sword goes for a Fujiwara Armbar! Volga scrambles and reaches out, ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Death Sword lets off to tag Gibdo.

Gibdo and Volga circle, and Volga asks Gibdo why. Gibdo doesn’t respond, and they just tie up. They go around, end up on ropes, and the ref calls for the ropebreak. Gibdo lets off slowly, but Volga avoids the cheap shot! Volga CHOPS, whips, but Gibdo reverses, only for Volga to come back with a SLINGBLADE! Fans fire up and Volga drags Gibdo up. Volga bumps Gibdo off the buckles in the Dark Force corner again and again and again! The ref counts, Volga lets off and he tags in Cia. Cia stops a mudhole into Gibdo, then digs her boots in! The ref counts, Cia steps up to swinging dropkick! She drags Gibdo to a cover, TWO!

Cia stomp and kicks Gibdo around, then shouts at ReDead that he’s to blame for this. Cia gets Gibdo to ropes to stand him! The ref reprimands, Cia hops away at 4 and distracts the ref, Wizzro gets in Gibdo’s face! “How could you do this to us?!” Gibdo swipes at Wizzro but Wizzro gets clear, and then Cia stomps Gibdo more. Cia stands on Gibdo again, reaches out and tags in Volga. Volga hops down and Cia stomps Gibdo to the apron. Volga runs for a DRIVE-BY DROPKICK! Volga gets up on the apron to slingshot senton! Cover, TWO! Volga drags Gibdo up to chinlock, and he drags Gibdo back to tag Kage in.

Kage and Volga stomp Gibdo down, then they both blast Death Sword and Gomess off the apron! The ref reprimands and ReDead protests but Volga and Kage then stomp Gibdo more. The ref counts, Volga exits at 2, and Kage drags Gibdo up. Kage throws body shots and a CHOP, then he runs, but Gibdo CLOBBERS him with a full body block! Gibdo stomps Kage, drags Kage to the uWo corner, then puts Kage up top. Gibdo ROCKS Kage, climbs up after him, but Kage throws shots back. Gomess sneaks a tag in before Kage DECKS Gibdo! Gibdo falls into a drop zone and Kage stands on the top rope, only for Gomess to trip him!

Gomess gets in and turns Kage around on the top rope. Gomess then crucifix carries Kage, RAZOR’S EDGE! Cover, Volga breaks it! Volga drags Gomess up to fire off haymakers, but Gomess knees low! Gomess whips but Volga SLINGBLADES! Death Sword gets in and BOOTS Volga! Cia springboards to missile dropkick Death Sword! Gibdo dragon sleepers Cia for a REVERSE DDT! Kage SUPERKICKS Gibdo! Gibdo wobbles, Kage SUPERKICKS him again! Kage then reels Gibdo in for a COMPLETE SHOT! Kage turns Gibdo over and gets the wrists! But Beedle gets on the apron, and he’s throwing Rupees all over the place!

The ref tells him to get down, but is scooping up the Rupees and pocketing them… Kage glares at Beedle, but ReDead slithers in to LOW BLOW Kage from behind! Fans boo but ReDead slithers back out. Gibdo gets up, he choke grips Kage, SOUTH OF HYRULE CHOKE SLAM! Cover, the uWo WINS!!

Winners: The UnderWorld Order, by pinfall (Hollywood ReDead joins the HPW Triforce Championship match)

This is a travesty! The betrayal of #DatGibdo, the underhanded tactics of the UnderWorld Order, and now the unfairness of ReDead jumping the line into the Triforce Championship scene! Will Kage make ReDead pay while also taking the title from his brother? Or will the Hero of Hyrule overcome these odds?


HPW Termina Championship: Fin Balure w/ The Young Ducks VS Igos du Ikana!

The Zora Rock ‘n’ Rolla pitted Ruler of Ruin against Gleaming Yellow Light, and now he takes on the winner! Igos brought this title back from the dead, will he breathe new life into it again? Or will this title stay with Arrow Club 4 Life?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see if Igos can turn back time, if he can find a way!

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Fans rally and duel already as the two stare down. “Let’s go, Igos!” “Arrow Club!” Igos is alone, but the Ducks drum the apron to emphasize “Arrow Club!” The two start to circle, then approach, and they feel out the grapple. They knuckle lock and go shoulder to shoulder in a test of strength. Igos hooks a leg and uses that for leverage. Balure bridges back as Igos pushes him. Fans cheer as Balure goes full bridge, but Igos sweeps the leg to get the cover. TWO as Balure gets one arm up. Igos pushes that arm back down, cover, TWO as Balure gets the other arm up. Igos hops on to push Balure back down, TWO as Balure bridges back up!

Igos jumps up to add more weight but Balure stays up! Igos tries again, Balure counters with a monkey flip! They keep the knuckle locks so it’s a double cover, TWO as both men bridge up! Fans applaud while Igos rolls and goes after an ARMBAR! Balure scrambles around and gets the ROPEBREAK! Fans cheer more while Igos lets off quickly. The Ducks coach Balure and cool him off, he and Igos reset. They circle again, feel out another grapple, and tie up collar ‘n’ elbow this time. They go around, Igos puts Balure on the ropes, Balure turns it around on him, and referee Maron Ronron counts the ropebreak.

Balure lets off slowly, and then he CHOPS Igos against the ropes. Maron reprimands and Balure “apologizes,” and the Ducks taunt Igos about the stinging in his chest. He glares at them but they don’t take him seriously, wiggling spooky fingers at him. Igos and Balure reset, fans continue to rally, and the two approach. Balure shoots in and gets a leg to trip Igos. Balure has a standing toehold and he stands on the other leg. Igos endures as Balure cranks the ankle. Fans rally and duel, Igos fights to get his other foot free and kicks at Balure. Balure stomps the leg he has, then drops an elbow on it. Balure cranks on this toehold while fans rally more.

Igos tries to fight back with a chinbar but Balure shrugs that off. Igos grabs at Fin’s head fins but Fin throws back elbows. Balure then stands up to drop another elbow on the leg. Balure pulls on the leg, but Igos endures again. Igos uses his free leg to hook Balure and he goes for an armbar! Balure clasps hands to fight that off, then fights to make it a cover, TWO! Igos still wants the arm but Balure scrambles around. Balure reaches out, and gets a ROPEBREAK with a foot! Maron counts but Igos lets go quickly. Balure shakes his arm out as he gets up, and he circles with Igos again. The Ducks rally up the fans and cheer Balure on.

Balure and Igos approach, Balure goes after the leg again but Igos blocks with a sprawl. Igos CLUBS then KNEES Balure, then wrenches an arm to a top wristlock. Balure endures, fans rally, and he fights up to his feet. Balure arm-drags but Igos holds on! Igos wrangles Balure down with a wristlock, then drops a leg on the arm. Igos ties up the arm in a short arm scissor and Balure endures again. Balure rolls back and tries to roll Igos up but Igos uses his legs to throw Balure down! ARMBAR! Balure scrambles around again and gets another ROPEBREAK! Fans cheer and Igos lets go as Maron counts.

Balure gets frustrated but the Ducks calm him down. “He’s just bones!” “Yeah, and a bad haircut!” Balure and Igos reset again. They approach, tie up, and Igos wrenches the arm again. Balure rolls, wrenches back, but Igos wrenches Balure right back. Balure spins through, wrenches Igos again, but Igos rolls. Igos ROCKS Balure with a forearm! Balure holds onto the wrist to wrench again, and then he CHOPS Igos. Igos ROCKS Balure again, but Balure wrenches and CHOPS! Balure then whips but Igos reverses. Igos blocks the Slingblade and shoves Balure to a corner! Igos runs in, Balure slips out to the apron and GAMANGIRIS Igos away!

Balure gets back in, runs, SLINGBLADE! Fans fire up and duel again as Balure flexes. Balure goes to a corner, takes aim, runs in and SHOTGUNS Igos into buckles! Igos falls into the drop zone and Balure hurries up top! Balure aims, leaps, COUP DE- NO! Igos moves and Balure lands on his feet! Balure staggers, turns around, and narrowly avoids an Elegy of Emptiness! Balure falls back on his ass and looks like he’s seen a ghost! Igos just stares him down as Balure backs up. Balure gets mad now, and he gets up to tackle Igos into the corner! Igos CLUBS Balure but Balure throws body shots while Maron reprimands and counts.

Balure RAMS into Igos with a shoulder, then CHOPS him. Balure whips corner to corner, runs in and CHOPS again! Then he whips back the other way, but Igos dodges to ROUNDHOUSE Balure in the corner! Balure staggers, Igos sweeps the legs! Balure falls on his face, Igos floats and facelocks to drag Balure up into a GROVIT! Fans rally and Balure endures but the Ducks look very concerned. Balure starts to fade as Igos cranks harder on the hold! Balure drops to his knees and Maron checks on him. But Balure gets a second wind! He fights up and NORTHERN LIGHTS! Igos holds onto the grovit, but it’s a bridging cover! TWO!!

Balure gasps and sputters as Igos lets him free! Fans are thunderous as Balure flounders to a corner. Igos storms over and he stomps a mudhole into Balure. Maron counts, Igos scrapes his boot off Balure’s face, but he backs off before 4. Igos drags Balure up, KICKS him in the chest, then wraps on a dragon sleeper and body scissors! THE GRAVE STONE! Balure endures and the Ducks panic again! Mack gets up on the apron and he has a towel! But Rick stops him. They argue, Maron tells them to step down, Balure throws elbows and hits Igos between the legs! Did he just low blow Igos!?

The Ducks hop down off the apron while Balure drags Igos up. Half hatch and DEPTH CHARGE BRAINBUSTER! Balure drags Igos to a drop zone then goes up top. Fans are torn as Balure hits COUP DE GRACE!! Cover, Balure wins!

Winner: Finn Balure, by pinfall (still HPW Termina Champion)

By hook and by crook, the Zora Rock ‘n’ Rolla holds onto the title! With this belt still in their collection, will the Arrow Club start to take aim at all the rest?


HPW Trios Championship Blood & Thunder: The Desert Flowers VS Forged By Violence VS Ganondorf, Zant & Agahnim!

For the first time anywhere, it’s three teams, two rings and a double-sized cage! Three people, one from each team, will start this match. Every three minutes, another person is added in a rotation until ALL NINE have entered! Riju, Aveil & Buliara have the advantage, while the Gerudo Ace and team have the disadvantage! But will that influence the outcome? Or will the Desert Flowers stay golden amidst the rain and rage?

The introductions are made, and keeping with the hot hand, Riju enters first! Iron Knuckle also starts for FBV, and to recreate the Triple Threat from before, Ganondorf steps in! The others are put in shark cages so they can’t go after each other. The titles are raised and the door is closed, “It’s TIIIIME… for BLOOD! AND! THUNDERRRR~!”

HyruleProWrestling TriosChampionships2 DesertFlowe by Cartridge88

Fans are thunderous as the three stare down. Ganondorf and Knuckle then both turn their attention to Riju! They rush at her but she hurries into the second ring! They both pursue her, she springboards to CROSSBODY, but Ganondorf catches her! Ganondorf keeps hold of her as he kicks Knuckle low. Ganondorf then trophy lifts Riju to TOSS her at Knuckle! They fall over, then Ganondorf SENTONS onto them both! He can’t cover so he drags Riju back up to FALL AWAY SLAM and send her back into the first ring! Riju crashes and tumbles while fans lose their minds! Ganondorf then sits Knuckle up to run and basement BOOT him down!

Ganondorf stomps Knuckle, puts him in a corner, and digs his boots in. Knuckle can only claw at Ganondorf’s leg as Ganondorf chokes him. Ganondorf pushes Knuckle into the steel of the cage! Fans rally and duel, and Ganondorf finally lets off after what would be a count of seven. Ganondorf looks over to the other ring and sees Riju dragging herself up the ropes. Ganondorf gets into that ring and storms over. Riju kicks his leg then throws body shots, but Ganondorf DECKS her with one forearm shot! Ganondorf looms over her as she crawls and the fans duel even harder. Ganondorf laughs as he drags Riju up.

Knuckle drags himself up and joins the others in the first ring. Ganondorf shoves Riju away then boots at Knuckle but Knuckle catches it! Knuckle CLUBS the leg, then GoroUppers! The countdown starts as Knuckle whips. Ganondorf reverses and Knuckle rebounds into a SPINEBUSTER! Fans count along, “Three! Two! ONE! BRR!” The Desert Flowers hurry and send Buliara! She rushes down the ramp and into the double cage to go right after Ganondorf! They trade big haymakers, Riju springboards and hits Ganondorf with a FLYING KNEE! Ganondorf staggers, Buliara RAMS him into a corner!

Riju stomps Knuckle while Buliara rams her shoulder into Ganondorf more and more. Riju then calls to Buliara and Buliara moves out of the way as Riju runs in. Riju back body blocks Ganondorf while Buliara stomps Knuckle down. Then Buliara runs back in to corner clothesline Ganondorf! Buliara snapmares Ganondorf and the Desert Flowers DOUBLE BASEMENT DROPKICK! Buliara instinctively covers but then remembers it doesn’t matter yet. Riju says it’s okay, and then they both stomp Ganondorf. Knuckle gets up, and they go after him! Knuckle shoves Riju away and ROCKS Buliara with a forearm!

Knuckle CLUBS Buliara, has her against the ropes and CHOPS her. Buliara shoves Knuckle then ROCKS him back! Knuckle ROCKS Buliara again, but Riju hops on him for a SLEEPER! Knuckle throws Riju down, Ganondorf tackles Knuckle all the way to a corner! Ganondorf RAMS his shoulder into Knuckle again and again! Knuckle CLUBS Ganondorf, drives in elbows and knees, but Ganondorf keeps ramming into him. Buliara runs in to KNEE Ganondorf in the side! Buliara back elbows Knuckle, and Riju goes to the second ring to run side to side. Riju FLIES to topple Ganondorf over! Buliara then hip tosses Knuckle onto Ganondorf!

The fans fire up as Buliara and Riju stomp Ganondorf and Knuckle. The countdown is back and fans count down, “Three! Two! One! BRR!” Forged By Violence send down Red Nut! Red Nut rushes into the cage and he CLOBBERS Riju! Knuckle holds Buliara’s legs and Red Nut kicks her low, DDT! Knuckle kicks Ganondorf to a corner, stomps him a few times, then storms over to Riju. Knuckle coordinates with Red Nut, Knuckle pops Riju up to Red Nut, but then Riju victory rolls and sends Red Nut into Knuckle! Riju regroups with Buliara and helps her get to another corner. Red Nut and Knuckle glare at Riju, but Ganondorf gets them for DOUBLE REVERSE DDTS!

Fans duel as Ganondorf rushes the Desert Flowers! Riju kicks him in the leg but he stays up. He swings a punch but she’s so short, she easily avoids it. She KICKS his leg, but he mule kicks her in return! Buliara is back up and she LARIATS him! Ganondorf stays up but he’s gritting his teeth. Buliara runs to LARIAT again! Ganondorf still stays up, Riju and Buliara coordinate, Riju wheelbarrows and Buliara tosses her, FLYING RANA! Ganondorf ends up on the ropes, and the Desert Flowers realize Aveil isn’t here. Buliara convinces Riju to try, and Riju runs to Tiger Feint! But Ganondorf catches her! And then drags her out to TOSS her to the second ring!

Ganondorf mule kicks Buliara, front kicks, then whips her. Buliara holds the ropes, BOOTS Ganondorf back, then reels him in for a torture rack! SWINGING NECKBREAKER! Buliara stands over Ganondorf, but then Red Nut  clotheslines her into the second ring! Knuckle stomps Ganondorf to keep him in the first ring while Red Nut gets into the second ring. Red Nut stomps Riju then drops an elbow onto Buliara. Knuckle drags Ganondorf up to whip him to ropes but Ganondorf stops himself. Ganondorf rushes Knuckle, Knuckle dodges and runs, DOUBLE LARIATS collide! Both men stay up and fans fire up!

Knuckle comes back and ROCKS Ganondorf with a forearm! Ganondorf staggers but he rebounds off ropes to ROCK Knuckle in return. Knuckle staggers, but he roars and ROCKS Ganondorf again! Ganondorf leans against ropes and fans fire up! Knuckle eggs Ganondorf on and Ganondorf shakes out the cobwebs. Meanwhile, Red Nut runs over to BLAST Ganondorf off the ropes, and that sends him staggering into Knuckle’s SPINEBUSTER! The countdown is back, “Three! Two! One! BRR!” Ganondorf finally gets reinforcements from Zant! And Zant starts looking under the ring! Zant brings out a trash can full of stuff and brings it in with him!

Zant dumps the trash can out, then he SMACKS Knuckle in the head with the can! Knuckle drops to a knee, so Zant puts the can down and reels Knuckle in. Knuckle is too big to suplex, and Knuckle tosses Zant away. But Knuckle turns around into Ganondorf’s low kick. Ganondorf reels Knuckle in to GANON BOMB him onto the trash can! Red Nut sees all this, but Buliara reels him into a waistlock for a GERMAN SUPLEX! Riju adds on a LYNEL-SAULT! The Desert Flowers stare down with Ganondorf and Zant as they each stand tall in the opposite rings. Zant eggs the Desert Flowers on while wielding the trash can lid.

Fans rally up as the teams stare down. But Knuckle gets up and turns Zant around to ROCK him with a forearm! Knuckle then takes the trash can lid to SMACK Ganondorf! Then Knuckle SMACKS Zant with it! And then Ganondorf, and then Zant! Knuckle tosses the dented lid aside to pick up something that was dumped out of the can. It’s a chain! Knuckle wraps the chain around his fist! Talk about iron knuckle! Knuckle swings but Zant dodges to get around, spin Knuckle around, and hit a NECKBREAKER! Ganondorf puts the busted up trash can onto Knuckle to DOUBLE STOMP it in! Riju springboards to SEATED SENTON Zant down!

The countdown is back again! “Three! Two! One! BRR!” Aveil is let loose! She rushes down, goes looking under the ring, and she brings out kendo sticks! Aveil gets in, tosses a kendo stick to Buliara and Buliara SMACKS Ganondorf in the head! Aveil throws another to Riju and she SMACKS Knuckle while he’s down! Aveil gets into the second ring to SMACK Red Nut! The fans are thunderous as the Desert Flowers SMACK away on everyone else! Then the three regroup and touch the kendo sticks together, “SA-O-TEN!” Riju turns around and Zant JAMS her with a baseball bat! It was apparently in the trash can.

Buliara swings the kendo stick but Zant guards with the baseball bat! Knuckle gets in the second ring and he rushes Aveil! He RAMS her into the corner then grinds his shoulder into her. Red Nut gets up and runs in to forearm smash Aveil! Zant swings but Buliara dodges the baseball bat. She SMACKS Zant on the back, but then a bloodied Ganondorf ROCKS her with a forearm! Buliara staggers and Ganondorf takes the kendo stick from her. Ganondorf SMACKS Buliara, but then Riju SMACKS Ganondorf! Ganondorf swings on Riju but misses. Riju SMACKS Ganondorf again, but then Zant CLOBBERS Riju with the bat!

Ganondorf SMACKS Buliara with the kendo stick, then Zant JAMS her with the bat. Ganondorf SMACKS Buliara again, and they have Buliara in a corner. Zant JAMS Buliara again, then CRACKS her on the back! As for Aveil, Knuckle and Red Nut CLUB her over and over. They double whip to then double back elbow. Then Red Nut runs, he and Knuckle FIST DROP SPLASH COMBO! They then get into the first ring and they each BOOT Ganondorf and Zant! Knuckle picks up the bat and Red Nut picks up a kendo stick. Red Nut SMACKS Zant and Knuckle CHOKES Ganondorf with the bat!

Fans are torn as Knuckle keeps on Ganondorf with the bat against his throat. Red Nut SMACKS Zant more, but then Buliara goes after him. They fight over the kendo stick, Buliara gets the stick away from him, and then Aveil springboard missile dropkicks Red Nut down! The countdown returns! “Three! Two! One! BRR!” Blue Nut is unleashed! And just like Zant and Aveil, he looks under the ring and brings out chairs! Knuckle JAMS Buliara with the baseball bat, but a bloodied Riju jumps on him for a sleeper! Blue Nut gets in to SMACK Riju! She drops off Knuckle, then Blue Nut SMACKS Aveil with the chair!

Buliara storms over but Blue Nut dodges her kendo stick attack. Blue Nut SMACKS Buliara on the back, then Red Nut CLOBBERS her! Knuckle RAMS Ganondorf into a corner, then whips him corner to corner. Knuckle then runs in to back body block and PELE! Ganondorf staggers, HEAD SHOT from Blue Nut! Zant gets up, Red Nut BOOTS him again! Red Nut and Blue Nut coordinate, they give Zant the NUT BUSTER! Fans rally and duel as FBV stand tall now. Riju staggers up and throws body shots, but they don’t hurt Red Nut much. Red Nut ROCKS Riju with a forearm, Blue Nut pops her up to Red Nut and Red Nut hits a GERMAN SUPLEX!

Zant crawls to the second ring while Knuckle stomps Buliara into a corner. Knuckle stomps a mudhole, then digs a knee in. Blue Nut stands Aveil up, then pops her up to Red Nut for another GERMAN SUPLEX! Red Nut spots Zant, he and Blue Nut head over together. They stalk Zant to the far side and then go after him at the ropes. Zant stomps Blue Nut’s foot then HELL STABS Red Nut! Red Nut sputters away while Blue Nut hobbles, and Zant RAMS Blue Nut into the steel cage! Zant then brings Blue Nut around to RAM into Red Nut! The Dark Nuts fall over and Zant stomps away on each of them!

Knuckle sees what happened to the Nuts and storms towards the ropes between rings. Aveil SMACKS Knuckle with the kendo stick! Riju SMACKS Knuckle, too! They SMACK and SMACK and SMACK Knuckle on all sides, and then Buliara SHOTGUN dropkicks Knuckle down! But then Ganondorf SMACKS Buliara with the trash can lid! Aveil SMACKS Ganondorf with the kendo stick, and Riju SMACKS him, too! Ganondorf stays up, he catches one kendo stick, then the other! Ganondorf sends Riju and Aveil into each other, then DOUBLE DROPKICKS them! And kips up while holding onto the kendo sticks!

Fans actually fire up as Ganondorf fires up! Buliara rushes over but Ganondorf SMACKS, SMACKS and SMACKS with his dual wielding kendo sticks! Then he DOUBLE SMACKS Buliara on the shoulders and she drops down! The final countdown begins! “Three! Two! One! BRR!!” Ganondorf points to the top of the ramp as Agahnim is released. “Agahnim! GET THE TABLES!!” Fans are thunderous as Agahnim looks under the ring. “Nana nana, nana nana, nana nana, nana nana… NA NA NA NAAA~!” He brings out a table! He puts that in and Zant hurries to help set it up. And then Agahnim brings out another table!

Fans are chanting “TABLES! TABLES!” as Agahnim even brings out a third table! Agahnim leaves it at that and finally gets in. The cage closes one last time, and finally, this match can reach the end! Agahnim picks up the baseball bat and he JAMS Knuckle. Then he CRACKS Knuckle on the back! Zant props a table up in a corner but then Red Nut goes after him! They brawl, Blue Nut gets into go after Ganondorf. Ganondorf SMACKS Blue Nut with a kendo stick, Agahnim JAMS Blue Nut with the bat! Ganondorf BOOTS Blue Nut down! Zant pulls Red Nut’s mask, fans boo, and Agahnim helps Zant put Red Nut up against the table.

Agahnim JAMS Red Nut in the gut with the bat. But then the Desert Flowers attack! Riju SMACKS Zant with the beat-up trash can! Buliara scraps with Ganondorf and tumble through ropes into the second ring. Ganondorf kicks Buliara away but she comes back with a JUMP KNEE! Aveil RANAS Agahnim into a corner, then runs side to side to BOOT WASH him! She sits Aghanim up, then she wedges a chair in front of his face. Riju drop toeholds Zant into another corner and he hits buckles. Riju then gets another of the chairs and does the same as Aveil with Agahnim. They coordinate in the other corners, and count it out! “Three! Two! One! BRR!!” DOUBLE COAST2COASTS!!

Fans lose their minds but then Knuckle BOOTS Riju down! Then he hits a SENTON! Aveil rushes him but he pops her up for a FLAPJACK onto one of the tables! The wood doesn’t break but that had to hurt! Buliara springboards?! She CROSSBODIES Knuckle down! Red Nut and Blue Nut mug Buliara, then they double whip her corner to corner. Buliara stops herself before crashing into the table, but then Red Nut whips Blue Nut in to SPEAR Buliara through the table!! Fans lose their minds again while Blue Nut and Buliara are down in the wreckage! But then Ganondorf gets in and kicks Red Nut low! DEMISE DRIVER!

Knuckle gets up and fans are thunderous as he and Ganondorf are the last two left! And the brawl is on! Fans duel as hard as every, “Let’s Go, Knuckle!” “GAN-ON-DORF!” Knuckle throws body shots, a forearm, then GoroUppers! Knuckle spins but Ganondorf boots the rolling elbow! Ganondorf reels Knuckle in for a back suplex FACEBUSTER, onto the busted trash can! Knuckle clutches his face, his mask may have saved his skin. Ganondorf RAMS Knuckle into the steel of the cage! And then goes to the opposite side to RAM him into more steel! Knuckle staggers back, Ganondorf LARIATS him down!

Ganondorf sets up the third and final table in the center of the ring. He goes back to Knuckle and drags him up. “Now… YOU must die!!” Ganondorf whips Knuckle and pops him up, GANON BOMB through the table!!! Ganondorf covers with one boot, and his team wins!!

Winners: Ganondorf, Zant & Agahnim, by pinfall (NEW HPW Trios Champions)

The Gerudo Ace roars in victory! He makes history as becoming the first to have HPW Triforce and Trios Championships on his record! His teammates sputter as they pick themselves up. Ganondorf hands each of them a belt, and the three stand tall. From crimson masks to scratches on the back, there was definitely blood spilled in this match. Will there be even more blood, sweat and tears now that Ganondorf reigns again?

My Thoughts:

I think this Blood & Thunder match, more than any of the others matches I’ve written, has given me new respect for companies booking out such extreme matches. That original Triple Threat Trios WarGames NXT did in 2017 was so good for having so many angles to cover. I was torn on whether Ganondorf should win or not, but I figured it’d be good for HPW history, and this was a great way to settle things between Ganondorf and Iron Knuckle. As for everything else, Tali having Shabonne help her cheat was a pretty standard finish for a Heel Champion.

Midna winning again felt like a proper follow-up, she needs momentum, and Ghirahim will feel the pressure since he has one Fused Shadow left. The uWo of course cheat their way to the win so ReDead can complicate the title match. And yes, Balure wins with his own take on the Heel distraction, but I think it was a rather clever one. Has anyone ever low blowed out of a sleeper? That’s definitely a first for HPW.

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Bandwagon Nerds #236: Superhero Madness- Endgame

Superhero Madness reaches its awesome conclusion, plus trailers for Season 2 of The Rings of Power, and more streaming services decide to band together.



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Superhero Madness reaches its endgame this week with the Final Four and the Final battle to determine the greatest superhero of them all. Scarlet Witch, Iron Man, Doctor Strange, and Superman walked into the Final Four, but only one left being able to lay claim as the GOAT of superheroes. Who came away with the ultimate prize? An extended trip to the Trailer Park looked at the latest offerings from Season 2 of The Rings of Power, a prequel to Dune, a movie from Francis Ford Coppola decades in the making, and a new take on the Wizard of Oz prequel story, Wicked. In News Around the Nerdosphere, Patrick debunks a rumor about one of Disney’s most beloved characters, more streaming services decide to combine forces, still more Fantastic Four casting news, and a Spider-Man Noir series is coming soon….and you’ll never guess who will be playing the titular role.

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Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu News Report! (5/16/24)

Fallout from ThunderStruck!



As Spring gives way to Summer…

The storm has passed, see who still reigns in HPW! We hear from the winners and losers of ThunderStruck 3, and of Blood & Thunder!


After the Death Mountain Championship.

Torbevito returns backstage.

Arrow Club is there, and Mack Quackson asks, “Torbs, what the heck? Where’s the title?” Torbevito asks back, weren’t they watching? He lost. He lost!? Yeah, he lost! The Arrow Club sighs, and Fin Balure pats Torbevito on the shoulder, saying it’s fine. They’ll circle back to the Death Mountain title another time. Bad Croc Scaly’s about to go out there with Ruto, they’ll handle Cia & Ganon. The Club cheers the Swamp Boss and Zora Princess as they head to gorilla position.


After the Mixed Tag Match.

Ruto & Scaly return backstage.

Rick Quackson asks, “What in the name of the Golden Goddesses is going on out there?! You lost, too?” Scaly frowns as he puts an icepack on his face, right where the Kick of Calamity got him. Rick apologizes for pointing out the obvious, but this is still really upsetting. Mack says Ganon is one thing, he’s the one and only HPW Triple Crown Champion, from Triforce to Trios to Termina titles. But Ruto’s gonna have Cia handled, right? Ruto says of course she will! Don’t even think that Cia was anywhere close to beating Ruto out there. Cia may’ve been champion before, but she’ll never be a Goddess again.

The Arrow Club clap, nod, and give a “Yeah!” in agreement. But for now, they get to sit back, relax, and watch the rest of the card go down. Will the Zora Princess make sure the Dark Sorceress stays on the outside looking in?


After the World Triforce Championship match.

Link returns backstage.

Zelda is here, the first time we’ve seen her since HyruleMania, and she asks what happened out there. Why did Kage show up and do that? Link shakes his head and shrugs. Zelda wonders if Kage was being genuine. Link looks at her with confusion but she says Link has to remember, Kage was taken from his family and raised by an awful, horrible man. Kage doesn’t know how to help others outside of violence. Link frowns at her, and Zelda says she understands, Link didn’t need the help, so Kage was still in the wrong. But the point is that he meant well. Link sighs and shakes his head, not buying that at all.

Link gets himself an icepack as he starts to leave but Zelda brings up if Link’s talked about Kage with his sister, Aryll. Link stops, looks back at her, but says nothing. Zelda suggests that he should, Kage’s her brother, too. Zelda then walks past Link to leave, and Link sighs. Will the broken home start to heal? Or are the wounds too deep?

Yunobo returns backstage.

He’s of course upset over Kage’s interference with the match, but then he sees Arrow Club is waiting for him. Naturally, he asks what they’re doing here. Fin says they saw what happened out there. “A real shame, isn’t it? The ‘Hero’ of Hyrule resorting to such tricks.” The Ducks agree, they thought Link was better than that. Yunobo says Link said it was all Kage’s idea. Well of course he did! That’s what brothers do! You wouldn’t believe how many times Mack & Rick tried to pin the blame on the other. Like that time when Mack broke their mom’s favorite clay pot. Yeah, or when Rick broke dad’s favorite long bow.

Rick says hold on, that was also Mack. That big gust of wind blew it right out of his grip. What? That’s not when it happened. It was when Rick pulled really hard on the string and- Fin stops the bickering and says they made their point. For all anyone really knows, Link and Kage worked out their issues, then conspired to screw over his opponent tonight. It was just unfortunate that it was Yunobo. Y’know, all right place, wrong time. But hey, Nicholas Foolyere is a pretty fair guy, he might give Yunobo another chance. The Ducks agree again, Yunobo should go talk to Fooly. Yunobo is a little conflicted, but that much is true. He’ll go find Fooly.

Yunobo heads out, Arrow Club wishes Yunobo luck. Fin says to The Ducks, “Y’know, fellas, we may have these shiny new belts, and the rest of the team may be struggling a bit, but that right there… That was a good deed for the day, huh?” The Ducks agree yet again. Mack says Yunobo’s a good egg. Rick says, “He is, isn’t he?” Fin & The Ducks all smile, but what’s really behind them trying to help Yunobo out?

My Thoughts:

I know, that was a lot of Arrow Club for one article, but they were also pretty prevalent on the ThudnerStruck card so it makes sense. And there’s something to the idea that Arrow Club would want to recruit more members and they see an opening with how things went with Yunobo, Kage and Link. Yunobo’s in the top title scene right now, Arrow Club can get the top title if he wins it for them.

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