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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (7/1/22)

One more before MITB!

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SmackDown 2022

It’s a battle of the brands!

Before battling for the Women’s Money in the Bank contract, Raw’s Asuka, Liv & Bliss team up against SmackDown’s Lacey, Raquel & Shotzi! Which side comes out with momentum going into Las Vegas?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • 10 Man Battle Royal: Happy Corbin wins.
  • The New Day VS The Viking Raiders; No Contest.
  • Six Woman Tag: Asuka, Liv Morgan & Alexa Bliss VS Lacey Evans, Raquel Rodriguez & Shotzi Blackheart; Asuka, Liv & Alexa win.
  • Men’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match Fatal 4 Way Qualifier: The Miz VS Happy Corbin VS Mad Cap Moss VS Ezekiel; Moss wins and advances to MITB.

PLAY BY PLAY

The Men’s Money in the Bank participants are in the ring, and on ladders.

Drew McIntyre, Matt Riddle, Sami Zayn, Sheamus and Seth Rollins are high above, but Omos is standing on his own without a ladder since he’s already gigantic. Phoenix is fired up but there is still one ladder open, representing the remaining seventh spot. Rollins welcomes everyone to the show, and says we’re starting off on ladders because MITB is right around the corner! Rollins feels he can speak for everyone here- McIntyre says, “Whoa, whoa, whoa, sweet child of mine, you do not speak for Drew McIntyre.” Riddle says yeah, Rollins doesn’t speak for Drew. Well okay BRO~!

Rollins was just going to say that whoever wins the MITB contract tomorrow, “we can all agree that the best place to cash in is SummerSlam, when Brock Lesnar and Roman Reigns beat the hell out of each other in a Last Man Standing Match!” And since Rollins has done it before, he can tell you that it’s like taking candy from a baby. Now whether it’ll be a tiny Samoan baby or a tiny Beast baby- Okay, okay, bro, we get it. But Riddle says he’s rooting for Roman. So that Riddle can cash-in and beat that “disgusting, despicable dirt bag, bro!” Sami says that is NOT gonna happen!

Sami reminds us all of something: The Honorary Uce is in this match! And what that means is that Sami will climb the ladder, grab the briefcase, and that contract stays in house with the Bloodline! As long as Sami has the contract, that means Roman Reigns will be safe from the vultures. MVP says Sami once again impresses him with his idiocy! In fact, they’re all idiots! You don’t see this literal giant here? And Vegas, appropriately, is saying Omos’ 7’3″, 300 pound frame is the odds-on favorite to win! There is nothing anyone can do to stop that! So it doesn’t matter what happens with Lesnar and Roman, OMOS will be the Last Man Standing at SummerSlam!

Sheamus says he sees what MVP means. If Roman is the “Last Lad Standing,” then Sheamus will be over the bleedin’ moon, cuz he already cashed in on Roman! But if it swings the other way and Mr. BRRROCK! LESNARRR! Is the last one standing, then Sheamus is going to have to switch Lucky Charms for Wheaties, because that’s a whole different bowl, lads. McIntyre says, “Speak for yourself, Fella.” McIntyre beat Lesnar before, and in under five minutes. And tomorrow night, McIntyre beats all of these guys to win the MITB briefcase. But wait, The Miz makes his way out here? No one understands why but Miz has a smirk on his face and a mic in his hand.

“Drew, do you remember the last time I held that contract? I successfully cashed it in on you.” Miz is the ONLY Two-Time Mr. MITB in this company! Miz deserves to be in this match tomorrow night! But then out comes EZEKIEL! Fans fire up and Zeke says in case there’s anyone who doesn’t know who he is, he is Elias’ younger brother. And Zeke was supposed to have a qualifier with Kevin Owens, so if anyone deserves to be in this match, it’s him. And now Bum Ass- Er, Happy Corbin is here. Corbin tells Zeke that he is as dumb as his brother. And Miz, Corbin won this contract before, too. And no one, and he means no one, is as lucky as Corbin in Vegas!

But here comes MAD CAP MOSS! Moss tells Corbin that we were supposed to be done with jokes. The thought of Corbin squandering the contract again is hysterical, though. But no worries. Corbin won’t have the chance, because Moss is stepping up to take that last spot! Everyone argue about who is in and out, and Adam Pearce comes out to calm everyone down. He feels the tension, but he has a way to blow it off. Here’s a preview of the MITB match itself. Let’s move the ladders out, for a good ol’ fashioned BATTLE ROYAL! And it starts right now! A battle royal!? For a spot? The seventh spot or someone else’s spot? We’ll have to wait and see, after the break!

 

10 Man Battle Royal!

It seems this is just about asserting dominance before going for the grand prize! Will it be someone already in the Men’s MITB Ladder Match who comes out on top? Or will one of the hopefuls use this to prove their worth?

The bell rings and Riddle rushes Omos! Rollins is after Zeke, Corbin is after McIntyre, Omos throws Riddle off but Sheamus and Moss try! The Miz and Sami, wily as ever, hang back and watch things unfold. Miz stomps Riddle down, Zeke CLUBS Rollins and Omos CLUBS Sheamus! Zeke tries to lift Rollins up and out and Moss goes after Miz, and Riddle jumps onto Omos’ back! Sheamus kicks Omos low, Sami still stays the odd man out. Omos throws Riddle off, CLUBS Sheamus down, Miz turns things around on Moss, only for Moss to turn things around on Miz! McIntyre throws Corbin at the ropes but Corbin holds on desperately!

Sami stomps Riddle while he’s down, throws him over the ropes, but Riddle clings to ropes! Zeke dodges Miz’s chop to CHOP Miz! McIntyre ROCKS Miz, CLUBS Corbin, CHOPS Miz, then CHOP him again! Omos digs his knees into Moss, Sheamus CLUBS Rollins, and McIntyre CHOPS Miz again! McIntyre throws Miz over the ropes but Miz holds on! McIntyre tries to scrape Miz off but Miz rakes eyes! Omos fires off elbows on Zeke in the corner! Miz bumps McIntyre off buckles, Rollins fires off on Moss. Omos CLOBBERS Zeke up and out and ELIMINATES him! Omos taunts everyone else while MVP talks some trash, too.

Riddle and Sheamus fight at the ropes, McIntyre fires off on Miz! Omos is after Moss but Moss throws hands! Fans fire up but Omos KNEES Moss low, throw him out and ELIMINATE him! The Nigerian Giant has cleared out two would-be contenders, and then Sami feeds Miz to Omos! Omos TOSSES and ELIMINATES Miz! MVP says that’s his guy doing the heavy lifting! Riddle fires off on Omos but Omos KNEES him down. McIntyre dares Omos to bring it, and fans fire up as the two stare down. Omos is a head taller but McIntyre fires off haymakers! Omos choke grips, grinds Mcntyre down, but McIntyre powers back up!

Fans fire up as McIntyre breaks Omos’ grip and ROCKS him with haymakers! Omos HEADBUTTS McIntyre down! Sheamus fires off hands on Omos now but Omos whips him to a corner. Omos back elbows Sheamus, then he looks at Sami. Sami says hold on, he helped him with Miz. Sami throws hands but Omos CLUBS Sami down! Omos spots Rollins but Rollins looks up at the briefcase. Rollins says screw it, and ELIMINATES himself! Rollins can’t lose his spot, so he doesn’t need to fight. But Riddle goes out under the ropes, to RKO Rollins!! Fans fire up, but Omos drags Riddle back up onto the ropes!

Riddle squirrels around to get a HANGING ARMBAR!! Sheamus and McIntyre help out, they DUMP and ELIMINATE Omos!! Phoenix is thunderous while the Celtic Connection stares down, and SmackDown goes to break!

SmackDown returns, Sheamus has Sami in a corner but Riddle CLOBBERS him from behind! Riddle fires off forearms and CHOPS! McIntyre and Corbin brawl, Sami scurries away, but Riddle fires off KICKS on Sheamus. Riddle runs side to side to forearm smash! Riddle runs the other way, dodges Sami’s cheap shot, but Sheamus CLOBBERS Riddle! Corbin digs his boots into McIntyre, and he stares Pat McAfee down over the SummerSlam challenge. Sami and Sheamus double whip Riddle up and out, but Riddle holds onto the ropes! Sami tries to kick Riddle off the apron but Riddle holds on and makes it back in!

Corbin throws McIntyre over! McIntyre holds on, he and Corbin brawl more! HOTSHOT sends Corbin floundering away! But then Sami CLOBBERS McIntyre! Fans rally for Riddle and he counter punches Sheamus at the ropes! Riddle CHOPS, slingshots, and fires off haymakers and body shots! Riddle KICKS, Sheamus blocks and short arm LARIATS! Sami and Corbin try to work together against McIntyre, and then Corbin helps Sheamus with Riddle. McIntyre just feeds off Sami’s haymakers, and then Sheamus throws hands on Sami! McIntyre CHOPS Sami, bumps Sami off buckles, then fires off fast hands!

Sheamus has McIntyre move aside, and now Sheamus fires hands on Sami! Fans taunt “BUM ASS CORBIN!” as he goes after Riddle. Riddle kicks Corbin away from the corner, and leaps, into a choke grip! CHOKE SLAM BACKBREAKER! Riddle writhes while McIntyre TOSSES Sami! Sheamus kicks Sami to ropes, drags him up from under the bottom rope, and he gives him Beats of the Bodhrain! McIntyre goes after Corbin in the corner, and then Riddle lurks behind Sheamus. Sami stops the Bodhrain to HOTSHOT Sheamus, and Riddle fireman’s carries! BRO TO SLEEP! Fans fire up and Riddle hits a BROTON!

Sheamus staggers to ropes, Riddle brings him up but Sheamus CHOPS him. Sami and Corbin mug McIntyre. Riddle and Sheamus brawl, Riddle BOOTS then dodges Sheamus to POWERSLAM! Sheamus ends up on the apron, Riddle brings him through the ropes, DRAPING DDT! Fans fire up and Riddle is hearing voices, bro! RK- NO, Sheamus denies Riddle and Riddle goes over the ropes! Riddle ROCKS Sheamus back, but Sheamus BROGUES Riddle down and ELIMINATES him! Fans boo but Sheamus grins, only to turn around into a CHOKE SLAM from Corbin! Sheamus is down but Corbin helps Sami mug McIntyre again.

Corbin brings McIntyre up so Sami can throw body shots and haymakers. Sami talks some trash, runs, but McIntyre BOOTS him! McIntyre elbows Corbin, fires off elbows and forearms on both of them, but Corbin waistlocks. They end up in a corner, Sami runs in, HELLUVA KICK hits Corbin! Corbin dodges Sami to hit a NECKBREAKER! Fans fire up with McIntyre’s kip up! McIntyre aims from a corner, counts it down, BROGUE from Sheamus!! Sheamus grins again and he hauls McIntyre up. Sheamus tosses McIntyre up and out but McIntyre holds on! McIntyre hammers Sheamus away, but Sheamus runs in, but the Brogue misses!

GLASGOW KISS HEADBUTT! Sheamus staggers away, McIntyre gets back in, and he LARAITS! McIntyre rallies on Sheamus, whips him to ropes, and hits the OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! And then another OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! Sami LEAPS in, but into an OVERHEAD Belly2Belly! McIntyre gives Sheamus FUTURE SHOCK! Fans fire up with the Scottish Warrior but Sami throws him at the ropes! McIntyre holds on, elbows Sami away, then dodges Sami to CLAYMORE!! McIntyre tosses and ELIMINATES Sami! Sheamus goes after McIntyre but McIntyre tosses him over! Corbin DUMPS them both and WINS!!

Winner: Happy Corbin

That Bum Ass wins like a jackass! But will this get him any closer to the MITB contract? Or will Corbin just have to settle for the ego boost?

 

Backstage interview with Happy Corbin.

Kayla Braxton congratulates him on the win and he says this is great! Do you see how happy he is? Corbin is so happy that he is fartin’ rainbows! He eliminated Drew, Sheamus, Seth (uh, no…), he eliminated EVERYONE! (Bigger no.) But did you see those pathetic looks on the fans’ faces? Just imagine those at home! It was amazing! And he knows no one will stop bitching or complaining about who he is or how great he is! Kayla points out McAfee’s SummerSlam challenge. Corbin stops being happy and seems speechless. Is it going to be a yes or a no from Corbin about taking on McAfee in Tennessee?

 

Backstage interview with Natalya.

Megan asks her about last week’s harsh comments from Ronda Rousey. Natty says that is all Ronda has left! She’s bashed Natty’s charisma, her looks, like Ronda is the one to talk. Natty’s seen the movies Ronda’s been in. And she understands why Hollywood isn’t knocking anymore. But while Ronda has made her snide comments, Natty’s seen nothing but fear in her eyes. Natty sees fear because she knows the Sharpshooter hurt Ronda, and that Ronda isn’t 100% physically. That is why Ronda is lashing out like a child. Ronda can make fun of Natty and her “rack” all she wants, it won’t get to her.

Natty will take Ronda down, putt her in the Sharpshooter, and make Ronda tap out! And she’ll be the first person to do that ever, and become a TWO-TIME SmackDown Women’s Champion! The only thing Ronda will be left holding is her 10 month old baby. Is this Natty making a promise? Or her own way of lashing out for what Ronda said?

 

The New Day VS The Viking Raiders!

Xavier Woods & Kofi Kingston, as well as the Skyscraping Shanky, were blindsided by the RAID! Erik & Ivar are back with a new and more violent edge, will they cut down the former ELEVEN TIME WWE Tag Team Champions? Or will Woods & Kofi prove that the Power of Positivity will never be stopped?

SmackDown returns and Woods has the mic to shout out Phoenix, Arizona. “It’s ya bois, the NEW~ DAY~!” And Kofi says there ain’t no better place to be in June than Phoenix, BAAABYYY~! Wait, Kofi, June is over. It is? Julying! HA! Fans laughed, they understood the joke! Pay up! Woods hands over a sweet $5 over that one. But Kofi says they are the guys who, when you come to a show, they make sure fans have a good time. And last week, everyone wanted to see a human skyscraper dance machine. New Day gave us that with Shanky! Shanky was cuttin’ a rug, hitting his thing, it was a great time. Until them damn Viking Raiders ruined it! RUINED IT!

Yes, boo them. Boo louder! Louder!! And to be honest, last week, it was not a good Viking Experience. But they get it. Now they’re being serious Vikings. The new VICIOUS Vikings, the dangerous Raiders! But if they’re dangerous, maybe… “Let’s get dangerous!” So then, serious, newly vicious Viking Raiders, bring your Asgards out here so they can send you to Helheim! BECAAAAUSE! NEW! DAY ROCKS! NEW! DAY ROCKS! And war horn blows, and here comes Ragnarok! Erik & Ivar indeed are vicious as they snarl their way to the ring. The ref wants the teams to sort out but they’re all staring down instead.

Woods offers the mic to the Viking Raiders, and then drops it! To then throw hands! Fans fire up as the brawl is on, but Erik CLOBBERS Kofi with his shield! Ivar CLOBBERS Woods with his! Erik CHOKES Kofi, Ivar hammers away on Woods! Then a feed to the SHIELD BASH from Erik!! Fans boo as the Viking Raiders then CLOBBER Kofi back down! Erik & Ivar don’t care about the match, and they decide to keep going! They haul Kofi up, to DOUBLE POWERBOMB him down! Erik drags Woods over to be beside Kofi so that the Vikings can stand over both of them. The Viking Raiders head out, will they lay waste to the SmackDown Tag Division?

 

Adam Pearce stops the arguments backstage.

He has The Miz, Moss, Corbin and Ezekiel all stop shouting. Kevin Owens cannot compete, which Zeke says should be grounds for him being in MITB. Corbin says who cares about that, Corbin just won that battle royal! Miz says he was on The Today Show at 5 AM! He traveled 2500 miles just to be here! Moss says he’s just happy to be here period. Pearce says each of them has a case but there’s only room for one. The four of them are in a Fatal 4 Way, win and you’re win! Moss and Zeke are good with that. Will this bring Corbin’s mood back down given the odds aren’t in his favor?

 

Six Woman Tag: Asuka, Liv Morgan & Alexa Bliss VS Lacey Evans, Raquel Rodriguez & Shotzi Blackheart!

It’s Raw VS SmackDown in a battle of six of the seven Women’s MITB participants! Will no one be ready for the Empress, the Living End and the Five Foot Fury? Or will the Model Soldier, Big Mami Cool and the wild child defend home turf before going into the ladder match?

SmackDown returns as Team SmackDown makes its entrance. The teams sort out and Shotzi starts against Asuka, but here comes Becky Lynch! The Man struts out with a mic to say, “Welcome to the Big Time! You know nothing important until Big Time comes around, and here I am in all my brilliance! Sorry, Phoenix, though, you’re gonna have to wait, though. I’m sitting this one out. After all I’ve been through to qualify, to finally get into the MITB Ladder match? No, no, no. You’re gonna have to wait to see me fight. And I’m not letting any of you snakes try to take me out, because I know that’s what you’ll do because I’m the biggest threat in this match!”

Fans are torn but Becky says instead, she will just lend her expertise to the commentary table to sit with Pat and “Mihal.” So go ahead, fight for her, ladies, give her something entertaining. The bell rings, Shotzi and Asuka circle and fans rally up. They approach but Shotzi avoids the grapple, and then she avoids a backhand! And another! Shotzi goes back to the SmackDown corner, and she argues with her team. Fans rally as Lacey tags in, and she circles with Asuka. They tie up, Lacey arm-drags Asuka but Asuka jumps the sweep. Lacey ducks the backhand, waistlocks, then whips Asuka hard into the corner.

Raquel tags in, she and Lacey set Asuka up for a SPLASH, then a HEADSTAND BRONCO BUSTER! Raquel covers, TWO! Raquel hauls Asuka up but Asuka fires off hands! Asuka sunset flips but Raquel stays up. Asuka dodges the elbow drop to SLIDING KICK! Tag to Alexa and fans fire up. Alexa smiles as she stares down with Raquel. Alexa does her best to look bigger as she struts around, and then she realizes she’s cornered. Raquel smiles back as she keeps Alexa caught, puts her in the corner and SPLASHES! Raquel whips corner to corner hard, then brings Alexa back up to scoop. Alexa kicks and gets free, only to get run over!

Fans fire up with Raquel and she puts Alexa in the corner. Alexa avoids the boot, tags in Liv, and fans really fire up for the double toehold! And double basement dropkicks! Liv covers, TWO! Liv brings Raquel up but Raquel blocks the whip. Raquel whips Liv, but Liv RANAS! Fans fire up and Liv runs into the corner, to SHINING WIZARD! Liv shoves Raquel away, runs back in, but no Code Breaker! Shotzi tags in as Raquel TOSSES Liv, then Shotzi covers, TWO! Shotzi stomps Liv, drops an elbow, then stalks Liv to ropes. Shotzi runs, CANNONBALL against ropes! Cover, TWO! Shotzi CLUBS Liv, whips her to a corner, then runs in, only for Liv to give her BROKEN WINGS!

Liv hurries after but Shotzi bails out of the ring. Fans boo and Shotzi wants Team Raw to stay back. She doesn’t want Lacey bothering with her, either, but Lacey says Shotzi should get in the ring. Liv builds speed while they argue, and she DIVES! Direct hit at the ramp but perhaps double-edged! Raquel hurries over but Asuka HIP ATTACKS her, and Alexa CANNONBALLS! Team Raw is in control as SmackDown goes to break!

SmackDown returns again and Asuka fights against Raquel’s chinlock. But Raquel CLUBS Asuka down, then drags her up to RAM her with shoulders. Raquel brings Asuka up again, but Asuka gets away! Alexa tags in, she dodges Raquel to KICK away on Raquel’s leg! Alexa SLAPS, ROCKS, KICKS and SHOTGUNS Raquel down! Fans fire up with Alexa and she eggs Raquel on. Alexa KICKS her in the leg again, then LEAPS, but into Raquel’s arms! Shotzi tags in while Raquel carries Alexa. And then Shotzi trips Raquel to make her POWERSLAM Alexa! Shotzi is practically fighting her own teammates! Cover, TWO!

Raquel is upset but she has to exit. Shotzi stomps Alexa, drops a leg splitting leg drop, then covers, TWO! Shotzi drags Alexa up, whips her to a corner, then runs in to SPLASH! Shotzi laughs and goes up the corner to reel Alexa in. HANGING HEADSCISSORS! The ref counts, Shotzi lets go at 4, and Alexa sputters as she reaches for her corner. Shotzi brings Alexa around but she won’t tag her partners. She snap suplexes Alexa into buckles! Shotzi stomps away, lets off at 4, but fans rally for Alexa. Shotzi drags Alexa up, bumps her off buckles, then goes corner to corner, to run into an elbow! Alexa BOOTS Shotzi, goes up and hops on, CODE-

NO, Shotzi holds off Code Red, but Alexa powers it through. Shotzi slips through to get a BOSTON CRAB! Alexa endures, fans rally up, and Alexa reaches for her corner. Shotzi keeps on the hold, but Alexa turns over to kick away at Shotzi! Shotzi is sent flying, hot tag to Asuka! Asuka fires off on Shotzi, whips her but Shotzi reverses. Asuka HIP ATTACKS Lacey, dodges Shotzi and runs to run Shotzi over! Asuka is fired up and so is Phoenix as she runs in at Shotzi. Shotzi BOOTS Asuka then ENZIGURIS, only for Asuka to get the ANKLE LOCK!! Shotzi fights, Asuka reels her in, GERMAN SUPLEX! Asuka runs to BASEMENT HIP! Cover, TWO!!

Fans fire up while Asuka demands Shotzi get up! Asuka drags Shotzi away, reels her in and waistlocks. Shotzi elbows Asuka away, but Asuka runs in. Shotzi dodges, Liv tags in! Asuka ROUNDHOUSES Shotzi, Liv hits the CODE BREAKER! Cover, Raquel breaks it! Alexa and Asuka DOUBLE SHOTGUN Raquel! Lacey gives Alexa a WOMAN’S RIGHT! Asuka BACKHANDS Lacey! Shotzi kicks and tosses Asuka! Shotzi says SHE is going to win MITB, but then turns around into ObLIVion!! Cover, Raw wins!!

Winners: Asuka, Liv Morgan & Alexa Bliss, by pinfall

Phoenix is loving it as Liv snatches the win for her team! But will this be a sign of Liv finally winning the big one?

But then Becky slithers in to MANHANDLE SLAM Asuka!! Big Time Becks won’t let anyone get ahead of her! Will we see the MITB contract go Big Time?

 

Sonya Deville meets with Adam Pearce.

She wants to talk with him about last week. He says that’s fine. Sonya says what Pearce did was wrong. She just wanted an opportunity and he put her in a handicap match! And she knows he got flack for it, because she filed a formal complaint. Yes, he knows that. Sonya still says he was in the wrong, but she knows this is going to be wrong, too. She SLAPS Pearce!! Is Sonya pushing Pearce to abuse his power the way she used to? Or will Pearce turn the other cheek for the greater good?

 

The Usos are here!

Jimmy & Jey, the Undisputed Tag Team Champions, are here ahead of Money in the Bank because on Raw, the Street Profits won the right to name a stipulation. But before that, it’s an… Ask Them Anything Q&A session? How deep are we going to go into the minds and lives of Jimmy, Jey, Ford and Dawkins? We’ll find out, after the break.

SmackDown returns as the Profits make their entrance. Kayla is already in the ring, as she will be the moderator for this “ATA.” Kayla starts by noting these four men will battle for THE Undisputed Tag Team Championships, but they are allowing the fans to ask them truly anything. To start with the Usos, “How fearful are you of losing your titles tomorrow night? And are you even more fearful of how your cousin, Roman Reigns, will react if you do?” Wait, let’s get this right. Out of all the questions the fans could’ve asked they went and asked if they’re afraid? Do they look afraid? This right here is confidence, Uce! The Bloodline runs all the damn shows!

Ford laughs and says y’all know damn well, Roman Reigns runs the show! The Usos just run to the grocery store. Jey will run his foot down Dawkins’ throat! Kayla has everyone calm down, this is about the questions. Profits take their turn. “It has been nearly a year and a half since the Street Profits have held WWE gold, and in that time, you lost one of the greatest opportunities of their career at WrestleMania. Have the Profits lost that killer instinct?” And there’s a part two! “What is this about them not getting along?” Aww… Wait, where are they getting that from? Dirt sheets? Probably. Tez ain’t just a teammate, he’s a brother.

And killer instinct? They’ve had a killer instinct ever since they got drafted back to Raw. Hell, they have it whenever they get in the ring with the Usos! But hey, make no mistake, partners. These two know all about the legacy and everything that was laid forth for teams like the Profits themselves. All the way back to High Chief Peter Maivia to the Wild Samoans to the Usos doing the dirty dirty! That’s respect. But as much as the family has prepared the Usos for everything in life, they did not prepare y’all for this hungry, starving Street Profits! Come Saturday~, the Profits are getting those titles under the bright lights! The Usos’ legacy comes to an end, and the Profits’ legacy BEGINS!

Jey tells Tez to be careful what comes out of his mouth about legacy. Jimmy & Jey know what everyone says about the Profits. “Street Profits got the potential to beat the best tag team in the WWE.” But y’know what? Usos actually like the Profits. “They walk like us. Talk like us. Move like us. Groove like us. But here’s the thing, though! They’re NOT us! And on Saturday, it’s lit now! The Usos are up, and WE WANT THE SMOKE!” Dawkins and Ford like the sound of that, too! Because the Profits gonna beat the Usos’ asses tomorrow! And at MITB, the Profits will be the NEW Undisputed Tag Team Champions! Y’all the twos, #WeTheOnes!

The belts are raised as all four men stare down. But have the Profits seen the future? Or will the Bloodline still run everything?

 

Max Dupri meets with Adam Pearce.

Dupri, getting in real close again, says he is so excited for this. The whole WWE Universe is excited! Because finally, we will see what we’ve been waiting for. We will see the magnificence of Maximum Male Models. The showcase is next. And Dupri lets out a long, “Yes…!” Will Max’s clients live up to the hype?

 

“Please welcome the founder of Maximum Male Models, Max Du-PRI!”

Max is already in the ring with the spotlight and he thanks the fans. “This is a momentous occasion. Maximum Male Models is the agency that is based on its passion and love of fashion that will be displayed by the most virile, athletic men in all of fashion. This moment is upon us, and so without further ado, allow me to introduce our first. You know him as Mace, but until he found his love of fashion, you can now call him… Maçè. And yes, the former monster of Retribution is now strutting his way out on the red carpet catwalk, showing off his angles.

Max says MMM is not about a line, skin and bones, or physique, but synergy, muscularity. Maçè is 6’6”, with sloping shoulders and slim waist with breathtaking 42 inch inseam. Just look at the ratio and the perfect proportions. Ladies and gentlemen, Maçè. Fans boo as Maçè heads to the back. Max says his next model is Mansoor, but no more. He has found his love for fashion, and he is now… Mansôör! Mansoor even has a fashionable fanny pack as he struts out. Mansôör is the epitome of what MMM is after. His overall aura, his heartthrob looks, and his statuesque physique. Mansôör is suave! He exemplifies the most important ingredient: charisma!

Fans boo again as Mansôör takes his leave. Male fashionistas will surely be clamoring to join MMM, but they shouldn’t bother, unless they have the same qualities as Mansôör and Maçè. The clients of MMM pose together now, and Max says they embody the creed, “To titillate the juices of your guilty pleasures!” Was this really worth the wait? Will Maçè and Mansôör at least still wrestle like Mace and Mansoor?

 

Backstage interview with Ronda Rousey.

Megan brings up what Natty said about seeing fear in Ronda’s eyes. Oh, how creative. It has been fun for Ronda to teach Natty how to promote a fight, and how to count. Ronda’s baby is nine months old, not ten, even though she is advanced for her age. But as a former friend, Natty should’ve remembered Ronda’s baby was born back in September. But Natty can still count on tapping out to the Armbar at MITB. Ronda kept it short and sweet, will she make it quick and painful when she goes after Natty in Vegas?

 

Men’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match Fatal 4 Way Qualifier: The Miz VS Happy Corbin VS Mad Cap Moss VS Ezekiel!

Each man wants in on the MITB Ladder Match, and each man will have to fight for that seventh and final spot! Will it be a matter of luck or skill when it comes to that last ticket to Vegas?

SmackDown returns as Zeke makes his entrance, followed by Corbin. The bell rings and Miz rushes Moss only to miss, and Corbin goes after Zeke! Corbin puts Zeke in a corner, Moss fires off on Miz and Corbin fires off on Zeke. Moss bumps Miz off buckles, Zeke turns things around on Corbin. Moss whips Miz to ropes while Corbin hits Zeke back. Miz reverses the whip, but Moss leaps! Miz ducks and the FLYING LARIAT hits Corbin! Miz rolls Moss up, TWO! Moss gets around Miz, Zeke goes up, FLYING SUNSET FLIP makes Moss GERMAN SUPLEX Miz away! Zeke covers Moss, ONE! Moss and Zeke stare down and fans fire up.

Moss and Zeke tie up, Zeke headlocks but Moss powers out. Zeke ducks and then kicks the back drop away to scoop and SLAM! Zeke runs, things speed up, Moss hurdles then CLOBBERS Zeke! Zeke gets up but Moss is after him. Zeke flops out of the ring and Corbin gets in to knee and forearm Moss to a corner. Corbin fires off body shots, then runs corner to corner, into Moss’ BOOT! Moss goes up and hits a FLYING SHOULDER! Fans fire up but Miz CLOBBERS Moss! Miz stomps Moss, drags him up to bump off buckles, and throws knees. Corbin helps Miz mug Moss, then Corbin goes corner to corner to SPLASH!

Miz says he gets a turn now. Miz soaks up the heat, runs corner to corner, but Corbin CLOBBERS Miz! Corbin runs back at Moss but Moss dodges. Corbin slides out, but Zeke ROCKS Corbin! Zeke fires off forearms and then clotheslines Corbin over the barriers! Fans fire up, but Miz throws Moss out. Zeke helps Moss up, Miz runs in but misses! He gets pinballed between Moss and Zeke then they SMACK him off the desk! Corbin RAMS Moss into steel steps, elbows Zeke away, then choke grips Miz to drag him out of the ring. Miz breaks free, fires body shots, but Corbin ROCKS Miz to hit an APRON BACK SUPLEX!

Corbin choke grips Zeke to stare McAfee down before the CHOKE SLAM to the desk! Even McAfee is wincing while SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again as Moss counter punches Miz! Miz wobbles, Moss ROCKS him again and again and again! Moss whips, Miz reverses but Moss ducks ‘n’ dodges to CLOBBER Miz! Fans fire up, Corbin gets in but gets a FLAPJACK! Moss catches Miz for a back suplex into a CLUBBING SLAM! Cover, Corbin breaks it! Corbin rains down fists on his former friend, then he drags Miz up to toss out. Miz holds onto ropes, slides back in and tries to sunset flip Corbin. Moss gets Miz’s legs, and he CATAPULTS Miz to LOW BLOW Corbin! Corbin’s not so happy there! Moss turns him for the PUNCHLINE! Cover, Zeke breaks it!

Zeke drags Moss up, throws hands then whips, but Moss reverses. Zeke ends up in a corner, he elbows Moss away and hops up. Zeke leaps, CROSSBODY but Moss rolls through! What power! Then the FALL AWAY SLAM! Miz hits a FLYING LARIAT! Cover, TWO! All four men are down and Phoenix rallies up! Miz stands while Moss and Zeke sit up. Miz smirks as he fires off IT KICKS back and forth! Miz then powers up, to BUZZSAW Zeke! And then BUZZ- No, Moss blocks! But he swings into the A-LIST COMBINATION! Cover, but Corbin breaks it! Miz kicks Corbin into a corner! Miz runs corner to corner, into a DEEP SIX! Cover, TWO!

Corbin is furious, but he refocuses and drags Zeke up. Corbin throws haymakers, Zeke throws them back! Fans rally as Zeke gets the edge but Corbin knees low. Corbin whips, Zeke goes up and MULE KICKS Corbin away! Zeke CLOBBERS Corbin, POSTS Moss, and then SPLASHES Miz! SPLASH for Moss! SPLASH for Miz again! Corbin choke grips, but Zeke JUMP KNEES him down! Cover, TWO! Miz is a little late, his ax handles club Corbin! Zeke dodges Moss to SPINEBUSTER! Fans fire up but Miz runs in. Zeke sends Miz to a corner, then Electric Chair Lifts! Miz slips off, full nelson, SKULL CRUSHING FINALE!! Cover, Corbin drags Miz away!

Corbin RAMS Miz into barriers, hurries back in the ring, and he has Zeke all to himself. Corbin stares at McAfee but McAfee tells the bum to focus. END OF DAYS for Zeke!! But Moss POSTS Corbin! Cover on Zeke, Moss wins!!

Winner: Mad Cap Moss, by pinfall (advances to MITB)

A bit of luck, skill and a lesson learned from Corbin, Mad Cap is in the Bank! Will Moss be able to have the last laugh on everyone when he wins that prized contract?


My Thoughts:

Go-Home Syndrome, my old friend. You’ve come to screw up once again. Because just… Ugh… All things considered, the “gold ol’ fashioned” Battle Royal was a lot of fun, but it meant nothing. It was just so Corbin could have a win while considering his feud with McAfee, and then have all that momentum taken away by him losing tonight’s Fatal 4 Way. That Fatal 4 Way was a lot of fun but it should’ve happened by default when those four guys came out to stake their claim. The others could’ve been in a Six Man of Riddle, McIntyre & Sheamus VS Rollins, Sami & Omos, and we could’ve seen an impact on go-home math. It still feels like Rollins is winning this anyway.

Moss winning the main event was a great surprise, because for one, better than Corbin since he has McAfee to focus on. It was better than Miz winning because he’s got Logan Paul to focus on, and we don’t necessarily need the tease of him becoming a three-time Mr. MITB. And while it would’ve been great for Zeke, Zeke “and his brothers” can wait for Kevin Owens to return from whatever undisclosed injury or issue he has so that they can settle their feud on the way to SummerSlam. Hell, that feud’s finish feels like it deserves to be at SummerSlam so this all works out in the end. I would love for Zeke’s biggest win ever, and Kevin’s biggest meltdown ever, to be on a show as big as SummerSlam.

Natty and Ronda had decent promos to keep their momentum going, but this is totally Ronda’s match to win. Sonya Deville’s interaction with Pearce and her slapping him was more impactful on their story, though. I do feel like Sonya should egg Pearce on until he snaps, and then there is a question of who is in charge of RawDown, with Sonya facing a female proxy like Raquel or Lacey. The Six Woman Tag was a lot of fun, and I like the unique take on dysfunction Team SmackDown had with Shotzi tripping Raquel like that.

But in the end, Raw wins to give all the Faces momentum, and then Becky goes after Asuka to at least cancel out that math. Becky technically stands tall, does that mean she’s out of the running? Fans would definitely love if Liv won, she got a great reaction tonight. But maybe Becky defies the math to becoming Ms. MITB, because I am still betting on the power couple of her and Seth. The New Day VS Viking Raiders being a No Contest was alright. I don’t think it added anything to the feud, as opposed to what a great tag match would’ve given. We know New Day can give us great matches, we know Viking Raiders can give us great matches, so let them give us a great match on the go-home!!

I don’t know why the final face-off of Usos and Profits turned into a group AMA, other than Vince and his team are idiots. Did they not four days ago set up the idea that the Profits get to name a stipulation for the tag title match? Did they forget about that idea in just four days? Or did they decide that they didn’t actually want to do that because Vince is becoming more fickle and impulsive as the walls are closing in? And even the Profits questioned someone suddenly questioning their bond as a team. What half-assed, rushed attempt at foreshadowing a break-up is that? We’re just lucky the Usos and Profits are great on the mic or this would’ve been a train wreck.

Speaking of, the train wreck of tonight was the Maximum Male Models segment. Granted, I don’t think the reintroduction to “Mansôör and Maçè” was going to go any different than this, but the extra weeks of waiting is what made it garbage. They were the ones rumored to be joining “Max Dupri” all along because of house show appearances, so why delay? Just give us their debut last week, and then they can have their first match here tonight against some Phoenix local wrestlers. Why wait until after a PPV to get things going for what is clearly a cringe comedy gimmick created by the king of cringe entertainment?

My Score: 7.9/10


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AEW Coverage

Mitchell’s AEW Revolution Results & Report! (3/3/24)

Revolution is a mystery!

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This is the biggest Revolution yet!

While the AEW World Championship is defended in a Triple Threat, Revolution is also Sting’s last match ever! Will The Icon retire undefeated? Or will the EVPs serve him a bitter “severance package?”

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – Kris Statlander & Willow Nightingale w/ Stokely Hathaway VS Julia Hart & Skye Blue; win.
  • Zero Hour – 12 Man Tag: The Bang Bang Scissor Gang VS Private Party & Team Triple J w/ Sonjay Dutt & Karen Jarrett; win.
  • All-Star Scramble: Chris Jericho VS Lance Archer VS “Powerhouse” Will Hobbs VS Wardlow VS Hook VS Brian Cage VS Magnus VS Dante Martin; wins and earns a future AEW World Championship opportunity.
  • AEW Continental Triple Crown Championship: Eddie Kingston VS Bryan Danielson; wins and
  • FTR VS Jon Moxley & Claudio Castagnoli; win(s).
  • Don Callis Family Feud: Will Ospreay VS Konosuke Takeshita; wins.
  • AEW International Championship: Orange Cassidy VS Roderick Strong w/ The Undisputed Kingdom; wins and
  • AEW TNT Championship: Christian Cage w/ The Patriarchy VS Daniel Garcia; wins and
  • AEW Women’s World Championship: “Timeless” Toni Storm w/ Luther VS Deonna Purrazzo; wins and
  • AEW World Championship Triple Threat: Samoa Joe VS Swerve Strickland w/ Prince Nana VS Hangman Page; wins and
  • AEW World Tag Team Championships Tornado Tag Match: Sting & Darby Allin VS The Young Bucks; win and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will begin later tonight]


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AEW Coverage

Mitchell’s AEW Collision Results & Report! (3/2/24)

It’s an All-Star Collision!

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Who heads into Revolution with a win?

Just 24 hours before Revolution, AEW Collision has a Triple Threat Qualifier for the All Star Scramble! Penta VS Dante Martin VS Bryan Keith for the final spot!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Buddy Matthews VS ???; No Contest.
  • All-Star Scramble Qualifier Triple Threat: Penta El Zero Miedo VS Dante Martin VS Bryan Keith; Dante wins and advances to Revolution.
  • Mariah May VS Angelica Risk; Mariah wins.
  • Six Man Tag: The Acclaimed & Austin Gunn VS The Dark Order; The Acclaimed & Austin win.
  • Private Party VS Christopher Daniels & Matt Sydal; Private Party wins.
  • Thunder Rosa VS Cassandra Golden; Rosa wins.
  • 8 Man Tag: Orange Cassidy, Trent Beretta, Hook & Daniel Garcia VS Christian Cage, Killswitch/Luchasaurus, Brian Cage & Roderick Strong; Christian, Luchasaurus, Cage & Strong win.

PLAY BY PLAY

Buddy Matthews VS ???

The House of Black’s Aussie Juggernaut opens Collision on Revolution Eve, but wait! Mark Briscoe drags Buddy out of the ring! The fans fire up but no, Mark is NOT Buddy’s opponent! This is revenge for the beatdown just last week! Mark SMACKS Buddy off the steel steps while the ref reprimands, but then Mark brings out a table! The fans fire up as Mark props that up against railing. But Buddy BOOTS Mark! And he SMACKS Mark off the steps! Buddy grabs a chair, but Mark kicks him low! Mark takes that chair and JAMS Buddy up with it! And SMACKS Buddy on the back! Mark tosses the chair into the ring, but Buddy knees low!

Buddy and Mark scrap, Mark ROCKS Buddy and slides into the ring. Mark then WRECKS Buddy with a dropkick! Buddy hits railing but Mark sets up the chair! Mark builds speed again and uses the chair to FLY! Direct hit, and through the table! The fans are thunderous as Mark rises up and high-fives the front row! Mark shoves Buddy into the ring, and he finds that spike! Mark storms into the ring with it, but Buddy asks for mercy! The fans say spoke him, but here comes Brody King! Brody drags Mark out, Malakai is also headed down here, but Mark dodges Brody to BOOT Malakai! Brody blocks the spike attack!

Brody choke grips Mark, but Mark LOW BLOWS him! Mark gets that chair again and he SMACKS away on Brody! Malakai runs up, but Mark uses the chair as a shield against the kicks! Malakai hobbles, Mark CHUCKS the chair into him! And Mark has the spike!! Mark storms up on Malakai while he’s down, and says this is payback! But then Buddy KNEES Mark down! Buddy saves Malakai, ROCKS Mark with forearms, then ROCKS him again. Buddy brings Mark up the ramp while throwing hands. Buddy underhooks, but Mark fights free! Mark back drops Buddy on the ramp! Then Mark CROSSBODIES Buddy down!

Mark still throws hands on Buddy, grabs something from the stage crew area, but Buddy storms up. Mark elbows Buddy away and- Wait, is that the switch for the pyro?! Mark presses a button, and the flames from Buddy’s entrance literally fire up! Buddy almost gets burned! Security rushes in but Mark keeps throwing Buddy around! Mark shoves Buddy to where the flamethrower is!! But then security swarms him before he can get the switch! The House regroups and retreats before facing disaster! Is Mark going to burn the House down with his own two hands?

 

Swerve Strickland speaks.

AEW shares footage from after Dynamite, The Realest having recovered from Hangman Page getting the jump on him. “I really don’t know what I should be pissed off at more: The fact that Hangman went out there and just ripped my $2,000 Jeff Hamilton exclusive jacket; or the fact that maybe I was just being a little too nice. I don’t really let my guard down too often, and in this business, you pay for it eventually. And it feels like I just paid for it. Swerve hung the Hangman and it was only right for the Hangman to swerve Swerve. You got me. I’ll never take my eyes off you ever again. This Sunday, you can’t get behind me. You gotta look me dead in my eye. I’m not gonna forget this.

“And as far as Joe, hm… I’m taking that championship. Whether I humiliate you on social media or in a promo, it doesn’t matter. I’m doing whatever it takes to walk out the historical figure of AEW, the first African American AEW World Champion. Whose house? Swerve’s House.” Angry yet focused, is Swerve truly the most dangerous man in that Triple Threat?

 

All-Star Scramble Qualifier Triple Threat: Penta El Zero Miedo VS Dante Martin VS Bryan Keith!

So far, it is Chris Jericho, Lance Archer, Will Hobbs, Wardlow, Hook, Brian Cage, and after last night’s Rampage, CMLL’s Magnus. One spot remains, will the eighth man have #CeroMiedo, represent Top Flight, or be looking for his next bounty?

The bell rings and the fans rally as the three stare down. The fans cheer for “CERO! MIEDO!” and Penta reminds Dante that they still owe each other. So listen! “CERO! MIEDO!” Penta pie faces Dante but then Keith shoves Penta. Penta takes the glove off! The fans fire up as Penta calls to Abrahantes, but then Keith HEADBUTTS Penta down! Then Dante SUPERKICKS Keith down! Penta gets up to SUPERKICK Dante! Penta KICKS Dante in a leg, KICKS Keith in a leg, “CERO! MIEDO!” Penta runs but into DOUBLE SUPERKICKS! Penta falls out, Keith DECKS Dante! Things get moving, Dante drops, hurdles then rolls back to headscissor! Then he dodges Keith to JUMP KNEE!

Keith falls out but Penta’s up top! Penta CROSSBODIES Dante, rolls off and keeps moving, SLINGBLADE! SLINGBLADE! Penta aims and KICKS Dante in the leg! Dante hobbles, Penta whips him to a corner but Dante reverses. Dante runs up, into a SUPERKICK! Penta then pops Dante up in the corner, SUPERKICK and BACKSTABBER! The fans fire up as Dante bails out and Penta takes aim. Penta builds speed but Keith is back to BOOT him! Fans are torn but Keith just reels Penta in. Keith underhooks but Penta wrenches out. Keith BOOTS the lariat away to then EXPLODER! Keith covers, TWO! Penta stays in this but also goes out of the ring.

Keith drags Penta back in, but Penta KICKS Keith in the leg! Keith CHOPS, so Penta CHOPS! Keith fires up and fires forearms! Penta wobbles but he ROCKS Keith again! They go forearm for forearm, Keith CHOPS and then DOUBLE LARIATS collide! Both men stay up so Dante DOUBLE CROSSBODIES them down! The fans fire up and Dante DIVES! Direct hit into Keith, then Dante runs to DIVE on Penta! The fans fire up again and Dante is feeling it as Collision goes picture in picture.

Dante drags Penta up, DECKS him with a forearm, then goes around the way. The fans fire up with Dante, but Keith BOOTS him down! Keith drags Dante up, CHOPS him, and Dante falls over. Keith turns around into Penta’s SUPERKICK! Penta drags Keith up, SMACKS him off the steps, then drags Dante up. Penta puts Dante against railing, hooks a leg around it, and KICKS! Penta assures the ref, he hit thigh and knee, not groin. Penta stands Keith up but Keith CLAWS Penta’s eyes! The ref reprimands but can’t do much more than that, and Keith KICKS Dante! Keith brings Dante up and into the ring.

Penta chicken wings Keith! Dante WRECKS Keith with a dropkick! But then Penta grabs Dante to spin him around on the apron, and KICK him back into the ring! The fans fire up with “CERO! MIEDO!” while Penta brings Keith into the ring. Penta keeps the chant going but Keith sits up with grit teeth. Keith seethes but Penta brings Dante up first. Collision returns to single picture as Penta CHOPS Dante! Dante CHOPS Penta! Then Dante CHOPS Keith! Keith CHOPS Dante and Penta! Penta SUPERKICKS Dante, Dante SUPERKICKS Keith, so Keith SUPERKICKS Penta! Then Keith and Penta DOUBLE SUPERKICK Dante!

Penta then kicks Keith low, reels him in, “CERO! MIEDO!” But Keith RAMS Penta into buckles! Keith fires off CHOPS and forearms! Penta shoves Keith away, but Keith comes back, only to be put up top. Keith HEADBUTTS Penta, reels him in, DIAMOND- NO, Penta stops that and Dante SUPERKICKS Keith! Penta uses Keith for a step, DESTROYER on Dante! Cover, Keith breaks it!! Keith saves Dante but also himself in this match, but “CERO! MIEDO!” continues to echo out in Huntsville. Keith storms up, but Penta KICKS and KICKS and “CERO! MIEDO!” Springboard, but into a BOOT!

Keith reels Penta in to underhook, but Penta fights free! Penta SUPERKICKS Keith, goes up a corner, but Keith RISING HEADBUTTS! Penta falls to the floor and Keith fires up! Keith snarls, storms up on Dante, but Dante catches him to a cradle! TWO, and Dante dodges Keith for the LEAPING sunset flip! Keith rolls through to KNEE! Underhook, TIGER DRIVER! Cover, TWO!! Dante survives and the fans fire up again! Dante flounders around, Penta rises up, “This is Awesome!” Keith runs up but Penta GAMANGIRIS! Penta then brings Keith to the apron, but Keith CHOPS! Penta CHOPS back!

Keith snarls, Penta eggs him on, so Keith CHOPS! Penta CHOPS! Neither man is backing down, Keith throat chops! Then Keith fireman’s carries, but Penta fights free! Penta CLUBS away on Keith, reels him in, APRON FEAR FACTOR!! Keith falls to the floor and Penta puts him in. But Dante leaps from the corner! Penta SUPERKICKS Dante outta the air! Dante wobbles on the apron, but he still hurdles over Penta’s tackle! Penta turns around, into an APRON DESTROYER!! Dante hurries to go up a corner, aiming for Keith! MAMBA SPLASH!! Cover, Dante wins!!

Winner: Dante Martin, by pinfall (advances to Revolution)

A huge win for Angelo Dorado, he is the final man in the All-Star Scramble! Will Dante use his speed and agility to snatch that golden ticket to the top?

 

AEW shares more footage from after Dynamite.

AEW Media caught up with Hangman Page backstage, and asked him about the attack on Swerve. Is he really not hurt? Hangman asks back, “Do I look hurt, you dumbass?! I’m fine, I’m in the match, and I’m sorry I took advantage of the trust of the people tonight, but I had to do it! I had to do it! I would rather DIE than have Swerve win the world championship! I would rather DIE than not win it myself! I did what I had to do! He’s hurt! He’s hurt, he’s weakened, he can’t have it, he won’t have it! I won’t let him! I had to do it! I had to do it!” The Cowboy seems to think he had to do what he did, but what will he do in order to finish things at Revolution?

 

BREAKING NEWS for Revolution!

After going back and forth with Julia Hart & Skye Blue, Kris Statlander & Willow Nightingale team together against The House of Black for a big Zero Hour tag match! Will the TBS Champion and her sidekick bring down the dynamic duo? Or will the Galaxy’s Greatest Babes with the Power prove The House does NOT always win? Plus, while The Bang Bang Scissor Gang tests out the combination of The Acclaimed & Austin Gunn tonight, they’re ALL going to team together against a rather eclectic six pack. Willie Mack, Private Party, Jay Lethal, Jeff Jarrett & Satnam Singh are teaming together, but will they be brought down by the AEW Trios & ROH World Six Man Tag Champions?

 

Mariah May VS Angelica Risk!

“Timeless” Toni Storm’s superfan and self-proclaimed protege is back in action, looking to keep her win streak going. Will this be the night she impresses the AEW Women’s World Champion? Or is she simply taking a risk?

The bell rings and Risk circles with Mariah. They tie up but Mariah kicks low! Mariah CLUBS Risk, puts her in a corner, and then puts some major stank on the DOUBLE CHOP! The fans cheer, Mariah stalks Risk to ropes and puts her through to pull her against the ropes! The ref reprimands and counts, Mariah lets go at 4. Risk sputters and coughs, but Mariah pulls her against ropes again! Mariah runs side to side to DROPKICK Risk in the back! Mariah winks to the camera and then brings Risk up. Mariah whips Risk to ropes, scoops her, and spins and spins and spins for the SIDEWALK SLAM!

Risk writhes while Mariah soaks up the cheers. Mariah blows a kiss to Nigel McGuiness and he is rather dramatic about it. Mariah smiles and goes back to Risk. Risk throws hands but Mariah CLUBS her down. Mariah puts Risk in a corner, then digs her boot in! The ref counts again, Mariah lets off at 4 and says she just deserves a slap on the wrist. Mariah then drags Risk up, snapmares her and runs, to basement dropkick! Risk flounders and Mariah shrugs. Mariah kicks Risk around, drags her up, but Risk ROCKS her with haymaker after haymaker! Mariah shoves Risk then DECKS her! Mariah runs up to KNEE Risk down!!

Mariah storms around, drags Risk back up and fireman’s carries, to hit MAYDAY! Cover, Mariah wins!

Winner: Mariah May, by pinfall

Nigel finishes marking out, and here comes Toni Storm! Storm goes right down to the ring and Mariah fangirls over her role model! Storm gets in the ring, but bypasses Mariah to get a mic. “Deonna Purrazzo, I must speak with you right now. Please come to the ring right this instance.” The Virtuosa does make her way out here, and storms right into the ring. Storm stays back and says, “Deonna, please. Hasn’t this gone far enough? Look at us! Look at what we’ve become. Is this really what we trained for? Is this really what we starved for, Deonna? Our friendship, destroyed. A new ta-too, a broken leg, a broken arm. All just to win a match. Is it worth it?” The fans sure think so! Storm isn’t so sure.

So Deonna, Storm says from the bottom of her heart, she loves Deonna. Her ability, her determination, and… that there is only room for one. And as long as Storm shall live and breath, it will never be Deonna! Deonna tells Toni, “I love you, too. I love… that you have your head so far up your own ass, you’re going to lose the one thing that started this entire charade to begin with! And I love, Toni, I love that you have forgotten the most important detail about me. I am the best friend and the worst enemy. I hope you have a bidet. It’s going to be really hard to wipe your ass when I break both of your arms!”

The fans fire up and Storm is unsure how to respond to that. But very well. Goodbye, old friend. Toni brings out lipstick to freshen up her make-up, and she kisses Deonna on the cheek to leave a mark. But Deonna fires forearms! They brawl, Deonna TACKLES Storm, and Mariah runs in to stop it! Mariah TOSSES Deonna away and helps Storm get away. But then Deonna runs up to BOOT Mariah! Deonna reels Mariah in and slashes her throat. This is for Storm! STORM ZERO on Mariah!! Deonna shows Storm that anything Storm can do, Deonna can do better. Will that also apply to being the AEW Women’s World Champion?

 

Six Man Tag: The Acclaimed & Austin Gunn VS The Dark Order!

While it was a bit rocky, Jay White & Colten Gunn made it work with Daddy Ass, so now the other half of the Bang Bang Scissor Gang gives it a go! And that means Platinum Max has a rap! “Bang Bang Scissor Gang, doing our thang!” But then Jay White gets too buddy buddy and it throws Caster off! Fans boo but White apologizes. Caster’s lost his window now, can he get back on the beat in the match? Bowens still says, “Huntsville, Alabamaaa~! The Bang Bang Scissor Gang has arrived! Scissor Me, Daddy Ass!” And he does~!

The trios sort out and Austin starts against Alex Reynolds. The two circle, feel things out, and tie up. They go around, Reynolds headlocks, but Austin wrenches out to headlock back. Reynolds powers up and out, drops down then swings, but Austin ducks ‘n’ dodges and trips Reynolds up! The fans cheer, Austin JABS, JABS, JABS and then two steps for the HAYMAKER! Tag to Caster, he and Austin double whip Reynolds to ropes. They DOUBLE HIP TOSS and we get a shot of “Juiceboard.” Caster brings Reynolds up but Reynolds RAMS him into Dark Order territory! Uno tags in, the Dark Order mugs Caster, but Caster fires off haymakers on them all!

Caster ROCKS Uno again and again, then dodges to DROPKICK! Reynolds runs up, but into a back drop! Silver runs in but into an atomic drop and RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Caster swaggers, but Uno stands up. Caster scoops to SLAM Uno, then tags in Bowens. Bowens tags Austin and Bowens goes up. Time to SCISSOR ME TIMBERS! The remix works just like the classic! Fans fire up as it’s guns and scissors up! But the flow is off again, and Silver BOOTS Bowens! Silver ELBOWS Austin, dodges Caster, and feed to Reynolds, POP-UP UPPERCUT! Uno runs to BOOT Austin then DDT him! Cover, TWO!

Austin stays in there for the BBSG but Uno stays on him with buckle bumps. The Dark Order isolates Austin as Collision goes picture in picture.

Uno DECKS Austin, mocks him as he crawls for the BBSG corner, then STOMPS the hand! Austin writhes, Uno tags Reynolds, and they get Austin up in an open corner. Uno CHOPS, Reynolds clotheslines, and then Reynolds snapmares to IMPLODER SPLASH! Cover, TWO! Austin hurries to ropes and the fans rally up. Reynolds storms up on Austin, taunts Billy & Colten, then tags in Silver. They double whip Austin to ropes to double drop toehold and DOUBLE BASEMENT DROPKICK! Cover, TWO! Silver scowls as he stays between Austin and The Acclaimed. Silver sits Austin up to KICK!

Austin sputters, Silver KICKS him again! Then Silver sucker punches Bowens down! The ref reprimands while Collision goes to break.

Collision returns and Uno is again taunting Austin to tag his team. Uno then drags Austin up, whips him away, but Austin uses that to BLAST Silver & Reynolds! Uno blocks Austin’s kick but the ref refuses to play along! Uno is upset, but Austin gets a leg and he gives it to the ref! Now the ref is okay with it, and Austin hits the NECKBREAKER! The fans fire up while Austin and Uno are both down! Uno and Austin crawl, their teams reach for them, and Hot tags to Bowens and Reynolds! The Five Tool Player rallies on the Dark Order! ROLLING ELBOW for Uno! ROLLING ELBOW for Reynolds! Then Rock Paper Scissors SUPERKICK for Silver!

The fans fire up as Reynolds gets the same, plus the FAMOUSER BULLDOG! Bowens shouts, “EVERYONE! LOVES! THE ACCLAIMED! BANG BANG!” But then Uno drags Bowens out and POSTS him! Caster CLOBBERS Uno, fires off on him, but Silver DIVES! Down goes Caster, but Billy tells the Meat Man to watch himself. Silver just flexes and says, “I’m freakin’ jacked, baby!” Silver shoves Billy and the ref has to stop the rest of BBSG from going after Silver! But this lets Uno & Reynolds both get Caster up, and Silver runs in! PENDULUM BOMB!! Reynolds covers, AUSTIN BREAKS IT! What a save!

Uno CLUBS Austin, runs up, but Austin gets around the boot! Dragon sleeper, SWINGING NECKBREAKER! Austin says “SUCK IT!” but Silver tags in and CLOBBERS him! BOOT WASH to GERMAN SUPLEX! Silver & Reynolds have Bowens isolated! Silver clotheslines, GAMANGIRIS, and whips, but Bowens reverses! The ROLLING ELBOW from Reynolds hits Silver! Bowens tags Caster, then clinch for THE ARRIVAL! Caster is up top, MIC DROP!! Cover, BBSG wins!

Winners: The Acclaimed & Austin Gunn, by pinfall

Jay White slides in to give the boys their belts, and he scissor fingers with Caster. The gang makes it work again, and look ready for Revolution’s 12 Man Tag! Will the super group be unstoppable despite the dysfunction?

 

Backstage interview with Kris Statlander, Willow Nightingale & Stokely Hathaway.

Speaking of dysfunction, Lexi Nair is with the trio of Galaxy’s Greatest Babes with the Power and their manager, nothing the loss to Skye Blue just on Dynamite. However, they do have the tag team match against Skye & Julia tomorrow night, are they having a different tactic going into it? Stokely wants to “address the elephant in the room” and go with the word of the day, “accountability.” He was watching a lot of The View, he is a Whoopi stan, so hey, he just wants to say sorry. Willow says put apologies aside. No more talking, they need to get on the same page. Tomorrow is not about friendship, it is about Revolution!

Willow warns Julia & Skye, “Stat and I are gonna kick your ass!” The Babe with the Power has flipped the switch from happy to angry, is tomorrow night’s Zero Hour going to be the last time the House of Black gets the better of her and Statlander?

 

Tony Schiavone is in the ring.

He brings in one of the men who gets a chance at an AEW World Championship opportunity in the All-Star Scramble. It is the one and only… WARDLOW! The Undisputed Kingdom’s War Dog makes his way to the ring and he just takes the mic away. “You know the deal.” Schiavone bows out and Wardlow says, “Looks like I finally got somebody’s attention around here, huh?” Fans sound a bit torn but Wardlow says, “Two years ago, I won the Face o the Revolution Ladder match. One year ago, I choked out your King. This year, FINALLY, I get my shot at the world heavyweight championship, after I beat all the other ‘all-stars’ in the match.”

Fans boo but Wardlow says the real question is: Who’s it gonna be? Wardlow VS Hangman? He’ll slap the Cowboy’s mustache into the third row and send him back into depression! Wardlow VS Swerve? The fans like him, right? It’s Swerve’s House, right? Wardlow will kick the door of that house down and whoop Swerve’s ass from the basement to the attic, because nobody else gets to eat before him! So swerve back into your lane and dance your ass to the back of the line! Swerve’s House only exists in Wardlow’s World! Maybe it’ll be Wardlow VS Joe. The fans chant for “JOE! JOE! JOE!” but Wardlow says he is so sick hearing these “dumb hillbillies” chant for Joe!

Wardlow says that he hopes it IS Joe! Because everybody knows that Joe is in Wardlow’s spot! And this time, Wardlow will finish the job. Not only is Wardlow going to take his spot, take his title, but beat Joe so badly that Joe will be forced to put on a headset and sit at the announce desk where he belongs! YEAH, Wardlow is him! He’s been him, will always be him! And tomorrow night, Wardlow reminds everyone that he is STILL the Face of the Revolution! Wardlow is the Uncrowned King of AEW, because this is no longer wrestling! This is WAR! But wait! Here comes Chris Jericho!

Wardlow huffs and puffs as The Ocho makes his way out here, mic in his own hand. Jericho asks a question: What exactly is Wardlow going on about? Swerve, Hangman and Joe? They are all great competitors, but Wardlow’s not fighting those three! He’s in the Scramble, and maybe you don’t know Jericho, but he’s not an all-star, he is one of the greatest to ever do this! And if Wardlow thinks he’ll just pass over him and six other men, six of the greatest performers worldwide, here’s some information for you. Jericho is the Ocho because he is an eight-time world champion, and the very-first AEW World Champion!

The fans cheer and Wardlow mockingly claps. Jericho says that makes the score 8-0 in Jericho’s favor cuz Wardlow ain’t won sh*t. The fans cheer that! So before Wardlow disrespects Jericho and says he’ll go right to the top, Jericho will remind Wardlow that it’s been four YEARS since Jericho lost that title to Jon Moxley in one of the greatest matches in AEW history, and Jericho hasn’t had even a chance to get it back, or even sniff it. So tomorrow at Revolution, this isn’t just another match for Jericho, this is a chance for him to get back to where he thinks he can be, to where he knows he can be, and that is the AEW World Championship!

Jericho knows he’s good enough. The question is: Is Wardlow? Wardlow chuckles but Jericho says Wardlow’s complaining about being overlooked and pushed aside. Thousands of people used to chant Wardlow’s name, he had a rocket that was put on upside-down, blah blah blah. Does Wardlow think that maybe it wasn’t any of those things? Maybe the people stopped chanting because Wardlow just wasn’t good enough. Maybe it’s that aren’t as good as you think, “Mike.” Wardlow scowls at Jericho using his first name. But y’know what, Chris? You’re right. Because Wardlow was this close to the top of the mountain that he could smell it.

But after Double or Nothing, Wardlow shows up for work, just to take a step backwards. And then the next week, another step, and another, and another. So yeah, that pisses Wardlow off to the point that he let it eat him away, to where he was taking work home and he let it ruin his personal life. Wardlow lost his best friend to this, and he lost himself! But after sitting at home for three MONTHS with no phone call, Wardlow slowly started to remember who he was. And he did what he have done so many times in his life: pick himself up off the floor, put himself back together, and then came back here to remind ALL OF YOU just who the hell he is!

BECAUSE HE IS WARDLOW! The biggest and baddest SOB to ever step into the ring! And he doesn’t give a DAMN what your name is, how many titles you’ve won, and just like he said last week, Wardlow is done eating the scraps! The fans fire up as Wardlow says if Jericho doesn’t think Wardlow’s good enough, well, Wardlow’s right here. Feel free to come down and show Wardlow so Wardlow can remind Jericho! Oh, if Wardlow wants Jericho to prove something, fine. Jericho will take that rocket off his back and shove it up his ass! Right, Huntsville? But wait! HOBBS CLOBBERS JERICHO! Wardlow chuckles, but Hobbs says watch this!

Hobbs rains down fists on Jericho, then tells Wardlow that HOBBS is the biggest and baddest! Fans boo but Hobbs says they’ve got one more day before this happens! The fans chant for “MEAT! MEAT! MEAT!” The Scramble is beefy, will it be one of the behemoths that comes out on top?

 

Backstage interview with Serena Deeb.

Lexi is now with the Professor of Pro-Wrestling, and says she is arguably the most experienced woman in the AEW locker room today. And currently, she is undefeated. But we’ve also seen a new side of her. Tell us just what’s going on. Deeb says not only is she undefeated in her return, she is undeniable and unstoppable. She’s putting on clinic after clinic every single week. And to be honest, no one’s really even challenged her in the ring yet. And that makes sense, because she is the Professor, the Woman of 1000 Holds. To be honest, she doesn’t think the competition she’s faced so far knows the difference between a wristlock and wristwatch.

So if you’re listening, if you’re watching, and if you consider yourself one of the best, step into Deeb’s Dojo and test yourself against the most elite wrestler. She’ll be here each and every week showing the world that nobody does what she does in that ring, and why Deeb is The Final Boss. A huge challenge has been issued, will anyone step up?

 

Private Party VS Christopher Daniels & Matt Sydal!

Marq Quen & Isiah Kassidy want to finally be at the top of the AEW Tag Division, but they’ve got to keep up the pace if they wanna reach it. Will they do just that against the Fallen Angel & Zen Assassin? Or will the former ROH World Tag Team Champions show them what it takes to really get there?

The teams sort out and Sydal starts against Zay. They circle and talk trash, Zay blaming Sydal for the loss in the Trios Triple Threat while Sydal says he was carrying Private Party. The two shove, then Sydal arm-drags! Sydal taunts Zay, dodges him, then tilt-o-whirls to RANA! Sydal then ducks ‘n’ dodges to RANA again! The fans fire up and Sydal runs up again. Tilt-o-whirl ARM-DRAG! Quen runs in, but into an arm-drag! Then Daniels gets in to arm-drag Quen! Zay arm-drags Daniels, but Sydla arm-drags Zay! The teams regroup and the fans cheer but the ref wants everyone to calm down. Quen and Daniels back off, but then Sydal and Zay tag them in.

The fans cheer as Daniels and Quen circle now. Quen is annoyed by how many are cheering for Daniels and not him. Quen and Daniels then tie up, Quen headlocks, but Daniels throws body shots. Daniels powers out, Quen rolls over the dropdown and starts up the “SHOTS! SHOTS! SHOTS!” chant. Daniels smirks, runs up, but Quen trips him up! Quen speeds up, steps over Daniels, “SHOTS! SHOTS! SHOTS!” Daniels is annoyed but he runs up. Quen bypasses but Daniels steps on him now! Daniels says “SHOTS! SHOTS! SHOTS!” but then wags his fingers. He does the Curry Man Dance! The fans cheer but Quen runs up, into a hip toss!

Tag to Sydal, he and Daniels mug Quen, then Sydal whips Quen into a corner for the GAMANGIRI! Daniels feeds Quen to the ROUNDHOUSE then adds an STO! Sydal gets the fans fired up for the STANDING MARIPOSA! Cover, TWO! Sydal taunts Quen, brings him up, and KCIKS a leg! Tag to Daniels, he and Sydal double wrench Quen to bring him to his knees. Sydal KICKS and Daniels BLINDSIDE LARIATS! Cover, TWO! Quen stays in this and Collision goes picture in picture.

Daniels is annoyed but he brings Quen up to headlock. Quen powers out, drops down, and Zay gets a cheap shot in! Zay gets away from Daniels, and Quen DROPKICKS Daniels down! Daniels ends up on the apron, Zay tags in so he can jump in, springboard and STUNNER Daniels off the apron! Daniels staggers around, Zay distracts the ref so Quen can CLOBBER Daniels! Zay goes out to shine Daniels’ head, then put him in the ring. Zay stomps Daniels, then puts him in a corner. Zay stomps a mudhole now, then tags Quen. Private Party says “STOMPS! STOMPS! STOMPS!” but they stop as the ref counts.

Quen kick steps and rolls back to taunt Sydal, then goes back for Daniels. Quen UPPERCUTS Daniels, puts him in the corner, and digs his boot in. The ref counts, Quen lets off at 4, but Zay CHOKES Daniels behind the ref’s back! Sydal protests but that only lets Zay do more! Zay lets off in time, then tags in. Private Party whip Daniels to atomic drop and ENZIGIRI! Quen then sweeps Daniels’ legs and Zay adds the HIP DROP, into a CAMEL CLUTCH! Quen runs to LEAP FROG STOMP, and then Zay BLASTS Sydal off the apron! Sydal is furious and the ref reprimands Private Party, but they just soak up the heat.

Zay brings Daniels up but Daniels throws body shots and forearms! Daniels runs but Zay LARIATS him down! Zay stays between Daniels and his corner, then he brings Daniels up to snapmare and chinlock. Zay grinds Daniels down, Daniels endures, and Collision returns to single picture. Sydal coaches Daniels as he fights up, and Daniels throws body shots. Zay CLUBS away on Daniels, shines the bald head, then kicks low. But Daniels stops the Twist of Fate! Zay comes back, into a FLATLINER! Both men are down and the fans rally up! Zay and Daniels crawl, hot tags to Quen and Sydal! Sydal DROPKICKS Quen!

Sydal JUMP KICKS Quen, ROUNDHOUSES him, then JUMP KICKS Zay! Sydal KICKS Quen, KICKS Zay, repeat! The fans fire up, Sydal dodges Private Party and DOUBLE RANAS! Then QUESTION MARK KICK for Zay! Quen swings but Sydal gets under to wrench and lift, AIR RAID CRASH! Cover, TWO! Quen is still in this and Sydal grows frustrated. Sydal basement dropkicks Zay into buckles, then he runs corner to corner at Quen. Quen dodges and the splash hits buckles! Zay runs in, but Sydal BOOTS! Sydal runs up but Kassidy ducks, Quen BOOTS Sydal! Quen reels Sydal in, Kassidy goes up, but SWANTON NECKBREAKER COMBO! Cover, TWO!!

The fans fire up and Quen can’t believe it! Quen calls to Zay, they get Sydal up to mug him. Private Party double whip, Sydal KICKS Quen then HEEL KICKS Zay, and a ROUNDHOUSE to Quen! Tag to Daniels and he JABS away on Private Party. Quen kicks low, Private Party double whip, but Daniels ducks the lariats! Sydal & Daniels LARIAT Private Party! The fans fire up as Sydal goes up and Daniels brings Quen around. Daniels underhooks but Kassidy saves Quen! Quen back drops free! Sydal leaps over Quen to METEORA Zay! Daniels is back up, but Quen dodges to Michael Jackson “HEE HEE~,” only for Daniels to dodge the Pele!

Daniels reels Quen in for ANGEL’S WINGS!! Cover, but wait, who’s storming down the ramp? It’s TRIPLE J! Jeff Jarrett and Sonjay Dutt distract the ref, while Jay Lethal gets in to give Daniels a LETHAL COMBINATION! Lethal drags Quen onto Daneils and now the ref sees the cover, Private Party wins!

Winners: Private Party, by pinfall

Quen & Zay get an assist from their future tag partners in Revolution’s 12 Man Tag! Sonjay does his best to dance to the music, but will this dirty half dozen find a way to beat all the Six Man Champions tomorrow night?

 

Thunder Rosa VS Cassandra Golden!

Serena Deeb may be undefeated in her return, but so has La Mera Mera! The former AEW Women’s World Champion wants to get some gold again, will she make it 5-0 in 2024? Or will this Collision be Golden?

The bell rings and the two circle. The fans rally as the two tie up and ago around. Golden shoves Rosa away, but Rosa shrugs that off. Golden runs in but Rosa gets her in a facelock! Rosa throws knees into Golden, but Golden powers up to throw Rosa away! Golden runs up, Rosa dodges the boot to BOOT Golden! Rosa eggs Golden on, then CHOPS her! And LARIATS her! Rosa fires up and the fans are with her! Rosa kicks Golden around, asks who is questioning her return, then bumps Golden off buckles. Rosa CHOPS, then CHOPS again! The fans fire up as Rosa stands Golden up and CHOPS again! Rosa then brings Golden around, fireman’s carries, but Golden fights free!

Golden ROCKS Rosa and Rosa staggers to a corner. Golden runs in, but Rosa dodges to SHOTGUN Golden down! The fans fire up and Rosa runs corner to corner to HYDRAULIC DROPKICK! Rosa pushes Golden out of the corner, climbs up the corner, and she DOUBLE DIVING STOMPS! Golden writhes but Rosa still keeps on her! COBRA CLUTCH STRETCH! Golden taps, Rosa wins!

Winner: Thunder Rosa, by submission

That’s a new twist to La Mera Mera’s arsenal! And she says it’s story time! “I’m still here, right? La Mera Mera hasn’t left. I know you wanna push me aside, but I won’t back down. Because it’s my time. And remember, get a little closer, because you’re gonna get burned!” Is nothing and no one going to stop Rosa from taking a title in 2024?

 

8 Man Tag: Orange Cassidy, Trent Beretta, Hook & Daniel Garcia VS Christian Cage, Killswitch/Luchasaurus, Brian Cage & Roderick Strong!

There are many titles on the line this Sunday, and the AEW International Championship and AEW TNT Championships are no exception! Freshly Squeezed will be facing the Savior of the Backbreaker while Captain Charisma will be facing the Dragonslayer, and let’s not forget the Cold-Hearted Handsome Devil and Machine are both in the All-Star Scramble! Which quirky quartet captures some critical momentum just 24 hours away from Revolution?

The teams sort out and while Garcia is glaring at Christian, Christian of course backs down. Instead, we get Brian Cage and #JustTrent. They tie up, Cage shoves Trent to a corner but Trent dodges the clothesline. Trent CHOPS, Cage runs up but Trent dodges again to headlock. Cage powers up and powers out, then he runs Trent over! “Who betta than Cage, huh!?” Trent scrambles to his feet, talks it over with his corner, and tags in Garcia! Garcia dares Christian to step up but it’s Roddy who tags in instead. Roddy and Garcia circle but Roddy SPITS at Cassidy! Cassidy leaves that alone so Roddy and Garcia tie up.

Roddy and Garcia go around, Roddy wrenches through to wristlock. Garcia rolls, rolls and rolls to get free! The fans cheer as Garcia wags his finger. Garcia and Roddy feel things out, tie up, and Roddy wrenches to wrangle Garcia with another wristlock. Garcia fights up, but Roddy wrenches again. Garcia grabs at Roddy for a clinch, pushes him around and turns him, then slips to a headlock! The fans cheer this technical exchange as Roddy pries at the hold. Roddy pops out the back to headlock and hit the takeover. Garcia headscissors, Roddy moves around, and Roddy turns Garcia over. Roddy then ties the legs up, and he smacks Garcia on the head.

The fans boo but Roddy stares Garcia down. Garcia stands, they tie up, and go around. Garcia puts Roddy in a corner, the ref counts, and Garcia lets off slowly, to CHOP! And CHOP! And CHOP again! Garcia whips corner to corner, runs up and clotheslines, then brings Roddy in! Garcia lifts but Cage makes the save! So Garcia fires shots on Cage! Cage takes a swing but Garcia ducks, and Hook is there to ROCK Cage! They pinball Cage around, then Roddy runs in. Garcia sends Roddy into Cage, then UPPERCUTS Roddy! Garcia feeds Roddy to Hook’s SAYANAGI! The young studs fist bump and the fans cheer.

The ref wants someone to get in, so Killswitchasaurus and Captain Charisma step up! Cage also joins in, but then Cassidy & Trent back Hook and Garcia up! The fans fire up for the stare down, Collision goes picture in picture.

The ref has everyone cool off, but Christian still swipes at Garcia. Garcia kicks at Christian but this boils back down to just Garcia and Roddy. Roddy tags Cage back in, he circles with Garcia. They tie up, Cage RAMS Garcia into a corner! And again, and again! Cage then CHOPS Garcia while Prince Nana talks trash. Cage soaks up the heat, runs corner to corner, but Garcia BOOTS him! Cage tries again but Garcia dropkicks the legs out! Cage hits buckles, Garcia does his dance! Then Garcia BOOT WASHES Cage halfway out the ring! Garcia drags Cage up, UPPERCUTS him, then whips Cage to ropes. Cage reverses and Christian gets a cheap shot in!

Garcia swings on Christian but Christian scurries away, and then Cage CLOBBERS Garcia! Cage tags Roddy and Roddy drags Garcia up to CHOP him in a corner. And CHOP again! Roddy brings Garcia around, tags in Luchasaurus, and they mug Garcia. Luchasaurus scoops to SNAKE EYES Garcia, then runs to CLOBBER him! Luchasaurus stays between Garcia and his team, then drags Garcia up. Luchasaurus TOSSES Garcia to the corner, fires off body shots and an UPPERCUT, then tags in Christian. Now the Patriarch of AEW wants after Garcia, and he CHOKES Garcia against ropes as Collision goes to break!

Collision returns and Cage has Garcia in an open corner. Cage whips corner to corner, gets the Terminator drums started, then runs in. Cage blocks a boot to ROCK Garcia! Cage then scoops Garcia, but Garcia slips fere to shove him into the corner! Garcia climbs up on Cage and he rains down fists! The fans count along, but Cage shoves Garcia down at 6! Cage then drags Garcia up for the deadlift SUPERPLEX! Cage shouts, “Who betta than Cage?!” Fans boo but Cage tags Roddy. Roddy deadlifts Garcia for a BACKBREAKER! Roddy stomps Garcia, tags Christian, and they stomp Garcia together while fans boo.

Christian keeps Garcia from his team, puts him back int he corner and CHOPS! Tag back to Roddy, he CHOPS Garcia! Roddy CHOPS again, then tags Cage. The stomping resumes, and then Cage drags Garcia up. Cage RAMS Garcia into the corner, RAMS him again, then soaks up the heat. But Garcia fires off hands on the rest! Luchasaurus grabs Garcia by the neck, but Garcia HOTSHOTS the arm! Fans fire up, Cage runs in, but Garcia leaps at him! Cage picks Garcia up to suplex, but Garcia DDT COUNTERS! Both men are down and the fans fire up again! Hot tag to Roddy and he hurries, but hot tag to Trent!

Trent rallies on Roddy as revenge for what The Undisputed Kingdom has been up to! Roddy swings, Trent dodges to METEORA! Christian gets in, but he gets a GERMAN SUPLEX! Trent holds on, GERMAN SUPLEX again! Then the HALF ‘N’ HALF! Fans fire up as Trent dodges Roddy and gives him a TORNADO DDT! Trent builds speed and he DIVES, into Luchasaurus’ hands! APRON CHOKE SLAM! Trent flops back down and Luchasaurus snarls. Roddy and Christian regroup with the team as Luchasaurus puts Trent in. Roddy stomps Trent, then digs his boot in. Trent goes to the apron but Roddy uses that to ROPE GUILLOTINE!

The fans boo and Trent flounders, but Collision again goes picture in picture.

Trent sputters, but Cage stomps him on the apron! The ref is too busy with Trent’s team as they protest so Cage gets away with that. Luchasaurus then CHOPS Trent in a corner! And ROCKS him! And stomps him! Luchasaurus drags Trent up, whips him corner to corner hard, and Trent tumbles up and out to the floor! Luchasaurus roars, Trent sputters, and the ref is busy with Cassidy so Christian gets a cheap shot in! Roddy wants one but the ref is paying attention to them by then. Luchasaurus fetches Trent into the ring, then keeps him from his corner with a chinlock. Luchasaurus CLUBS away on Trent’s chest!

Luchasaurus drags Trent up, tags in Christian, and The Patriarchy mugs Trent. Christian snapmares Trent and then claws at Trents’ face! The ref reprimands, Christian lets off to stare Garcia down, but Garcia almost gets a shot in! Christian taunts Garcia, brings Trent up, but Trent throws a forearm! Christian ROCKS Trent in return, then clamps on a SLEEPER! Trent sputters and Collision returns to single picture as the fans rally up. Trent fights as Christian squeezes tight, and Trent throws body shots! The fans fire up as Trent runs, but into a kick! Then a REVERSE DDT! Fans boo but Christian goes up a corner. Christian DIVING HEADBTT FLOPS as Trent moves!

The fans fire up while both men are down! Trent and Christian crawl, their teams reach out, hot tag to Roddy, and he CLOBBERS Trent to deny Cassidy! The fans boo as Roddy mocks the hands up and hands into pockets. Trent crawls while Roddy gives him the “devastating” kicks a la Cassidy. The fans boo as Roddy stomps Trent, then hauls him up and around, for a BOSTON CRAB! But Trent rolls right through to BOOT Roddy away! Hot tags to Cage and Cassidy! Cassidy ducks Cage to bump him off buckles! He does the same to Christian! Then another for Cage! Cassidy climbs to CROSSBODY Christian!

Cassidy SHOTGUNS Luchasaurus, dodges Cage and tilt-o-whirls, only for Cage to stop the DDT! But then STUN DOG MILLIONAIRE hits! Cassidy DIVES onto Roddy, goes back in and tilt-o-whirl DDTS Cage! Cover, TWO!! Cage survives and Roddy shouts at Cassidy, “You want some?!” But it’s Luchasaurus who grabs Cassidy! And Garcia! But they break free, dodge Luchasaurus, and ORANGE PUNCH! SHINING WIZARD! Roddy gives Cassidy a SICK KICK! But Garcia CHOPS and SLAPS Roddy over and over! Then SAIDO! Christian SPEARS Garcia! But Hook clinches, EL CAMINO! The fans fire up but Cage aims at Hook!

Hook swings on Cage, but into a FULL NELSON SLAM!! Cassidy runs in, but into an F5!! Cover, Garcia AND Hook break it! The fans fire up, Luchasaurus reaches out to tag in off Cage. Hook is still after Cage, Garcia joins in, but Luchasaurus grabs Cassidy. Trent goes after Luchasaurus and now Best Friends mug him! Roddy gets up, Cassidy BLASTS him off the apron! Cassidy DIVES, but into END OF HEARTACHE!! Cage powers out, but Hook & Garcia dodge to DOUBLE LARIAT him and themselves out of the ring! Trent is on Luchasaurus with a SLEEPER BACKPACK, and he’s bringing the dinosaur to his knees!

The fans fire up but Luchasaurus pries at the hold. Luchasaurus has a second wind and he THROWS Trent away! Roddy’s got Cassidy down in the Strong Hold!! Trent stagger sup, into the JURASSIC HEADBUTT! Luchasaurus snarls, dares Trent to get up, and then choke grips, for the JURASSIC CHOKE- VICTORY ROLL!! TWO!!! Luchasaurus escapes, Trent SUPERKICKS him! Luchasaurus stays up, so Trent SUPERKICKS again! Luchasaurus flounders, Trent aims from the corner, but Christian runs up! Trent DECKS Christian, but Nick Wayne CLUBS Trent! EXTINCTION LARIAT!! Cover, Patriarchy and friends win!

Winners: Christian Cage, Luchasaurus, Brian Cage & Roderick Strong, by pinfall

All the extra help on the outside steered things in their direction, and now the TNT Champion has momentum going into Revolution! Taven & Bennett then show up so they can help Roddy mug Cassidy! The Undisputed Kingdom vows Cassidy won’t even make it to tomorrow night! Cage and Hook brawl, Luchasaurus & Christian mug Trent! Cage whips Hook hard into railing! Luchasaurus & Nick get chairs for Papa Christian and Matthew Menard shouts from commentary! Daddy Magic storms in, but Luchasaurus HEADBUTTS him down! Then Luchasaurus gives Menard the FULL METAL CHOKE SLAM!!

Menard writhes as the chair is bent from his body hitting it! Hook baits Cage in and sends him into steps! Christian is still after Garcia, but Hook leaps to LARIAT Cage down! The Undisputed Kingdom has let off of Cassidy, but Garcia turns things around on Christian! Garcia CLUBS away on Christian and chases him up the ramp! Then he sends Christian into the LED screen! It is still chaos up and down and all around ringside, but will Christian survive Red Death to still be TNT Champion? Does Cassidy stand a chance of retaining the International Championship when he can barely stand on his own two feet? All this and more will be answered tomorrow night at Revolution!


My Thoughts:

A great Collision here, especially as the go-home to Revolution. I like the move of Mark attacking Buddy to “cancel a match,” and then Mark became a one man wrecking crew to really escalate things between him and The House of Black. I’m thinking if Mark doesn’t get allies to help him, then he should have some sort of three match series with The House. Mark will face each member 1v1, from Buddy to Brody to Malakai, and who knows how that goes, but Mark beating Malakai would be a good blowoff that also gets Mark towards a title story for the Summer. And really good promos from Swerve and Hangman to top off things for Revolution, with Hangman having a rather manic and desperate take on being a Face turning Heel. That’s a much more realistic turn in his character rather than the usual “I’m just a bad guy now” kind of stuff.

Really good segment from Wardlow, Jericho and Hobbs. While it’s not really good that Tony Khan books his people into these positions where their characters are always going, “It’s about time I get to do something in this company!” at least Wardlow is making the most of it with how passionate that promo was. And then while Jericho maybe goes one line too long for his part, at least Hobbs just beats Jericho down to make his point. Go-home math probably doesn’t work here, Jericho isn’t suddenly going to win out just because of this. I am still going with Wardlow as first pick, Hobbs as second.

Speaking of the Scramble, great Triple Threat, and a great win for Dante. I did not expect that, I really thought it was gonna be Penta, but Dante is another great high-flyer to get in on a rather bulky field. Great win for Mariah May, though I don’t think her matches have really gone long enough to showcase everything she can do. But it was also a great segue for Storm and Deonna to have their final face to face. Deonna stands tall because she puts the hurt on Mariah, that makes me think Storm retains and we slowly turn the corner to where Mariah gets fed up with Storm not caring about her at all, despite taking all these hits for her.

Great win for Thunder Rosa, and her little mini-promo after was really good, too. Again, feels like a case parallel to Wardlow about being a little annoyed at having to wait for stuff. Rosa did show up during the hype towards Collision’s debut, but then was not on a single Collision for months. Good promo from Deeb, too, and I want to say her saying “Final Boss” is some plug for Mercedes Mone to show up and be “THE Boss,” what with Big Business in Boston happening in a couple weeks. And apparently we’re not getting a TBS Championship or even a contender’s match. However, perhaps Willow & Kris VS Julia & Skye establishes someone as a #1 contender through the rankings to build towards the next PPV.

Really good stuff out of Bang Bang Scissor Gang, including their use of dysfunction within the group. They still win out because sadly, The Dark Order’s resurgence was only on ROH and then they got brought back to AEW just to eat losses. But with this being the second week in a row Caster can’t get a rap out, something is about to fall apart between the BBSG, whether we want it to or not. Meanwhile, Triple J helps Private Party win, maybe Jeff Jarrett wants to try and make a super group of his own. And apparently Lethal is onboard, because last we saw they were still arguing, so maybe Revolution swaps a super group we want for one that doesn’t make sense.

And great 8 Man Tag main event with a lot of stories plugged at once. The Heels winning made sense, and Trent taking the loss while Luchasaurus gets the win also makes sense. The math isn’t really affected by that necessarily, because then the chaotic brawl happens and we get varied results. Cassidy was beat down, so I’d think he beats Roddy. Meanwhile, Garcia threw Christian down before cameras cut away, so I guess that means Christian finds a way to win. Which makes sense, we just saw how Christian has three minions and Garcia only has Daddy Magic watching his back. That is, if Edge doesn’t show up to help Garcia.

Adam Copeland costing Christian the title rather than taking it himself would be good stuff for their feud, which doesn’t even really need the title. Edge VS Christian, The Final Chapter, just needs Luchasaurus to man up and turn on Christian and weaken the Patriarchy.

My Score: 8.8/10


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