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Mitchell’s NJPW Wrestling Dontaku Results & Report! (5/4/24)

Will the Maniac run wild?

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Wrestling Dontaku is covered in gold!

The IWGP Heavyweight Tag titles, NEVER Openweight title, IWGP Global Heavyweight title, and yes, THE IWGP World Heavyweight Championship, as Jon Moxley defends against the Souled Out Ren Narita!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Frontier Zone – Togi Makabe & Katsuya Murashima VS Jet Wei & Naoki Sakurajima; Makabe & Murashima win.
  • Tiger Mask & Shoma Kato VS TMDK; TMDK wins.
  • Yuya Uemura & DOUKI VS Great-O-Khan & Francesco Akira; Khan & Akira win.
  • Jeff Cobb & Callum Newman VS Zack Sabre Jr. & Kosei Fujita; ZSJ & Fujita win.
  • 8 Man Tag: Shota Umino, El Desperado, El Phantasmo & Hikuleo VS The House of Torture; Shota, Desperado, ELP & Leo win.
  • Hiroshi Tanahashi & Boltin Oleg VS Taichi & Taka Michinoku; Tanahashi & Oleg win.
  • Six Man Tag: Los Ingobernables de Japon VS Bullet Club War Dogs; LIJ wins.
  • IWGP Heavyweight Tag Team Championships: Bishamon VS KENTA & Chase Owens; Kenta & Chase win and become the new IWGP Heavyweight Tag Team Champions.
  • NEVER Openweight Championship: Shingo Takagi VS Gabe Kidd; Takagi wins and retains the title.
  • IWGP Global Heavyweight Championship: Nic Nemeth VS David Finlay; Finlay wins and becomes the new IWGP Global Heavyweight Champion.
  • IWGP World Heavyweight Championship: Jon Moxley VS Ren Narita; Moxley wins and retains the title.

PLAY BY PLAY

IWGP Heavyweight Tag Team Championships: Bishamon VS KENTA & Chase Owens!

Hirooki Goto & Yoshi-Hashi took these titles off Fang Revived & The Crown Jewel at Sakura Genesis, but Bullet Club is looking to take them right back! Will Kenta & Chase be the ones to #TurnItAllAround? Or will it be Lights Out here in Fukuoka?

The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and we see who wins the sequel!

The teams sort out and Goto starts against Chase. The two circle, feel things out, but then Kenta gets in to CLUB Goto down! Chase BLASTS Hashi, then Chase and Kenta stomp away on Goto! The ref reprimands, Kenta backs off, but Chase bumps Goto off buckles. Chase throws body shots, then headlocks for a punch! The ref reprimands, but Chase whips. Goto holds ropes, BOOTS back, then Hashi gets in! Bishamon runs Chase over! Then ZANMAI! Kenta runs in, Goto kicks low and reels him in. Goto snap suplexes Kenta onto Chase! The fans cheer and Goto CLUBS Chase. Goto puts Chase in a corner then whips corner to corner.

Goto runs in, but Chase BOOTS back! BUCKLE SHOT, STO, and SENTON! Fans applaud the string of moves, then Chase drags Goto up. Chase bumps Goto off buckles, tags Kenta, and Bullet Club mugs Goto. The ref reprimands but Chase pretends to be trapped so he can’t let off. Kenta puts Goto in the corner and RAMS into him! Kenta RAMS Goto again and again, then he smothers Goto! The ref reprimands, Kenta tags Chase, and Chase brings Goto out to wrench and BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Chase tries again, TWO! Another cover, TWO! The fans applaud as Goto is still in this, but Chase argues the count.

Chase kicks Goto, stands him up, but Goto CHOPS! And CHOPS! Chase CHOKES Goto and puts him in the corner! The ref counts, Chase lets off to argue with him, and that lets Kenta pull Goto’s hair. The ref sees that and reprimands, but Chase tags Kenta in. Kenta stomps Goto, brings him around, and whips to ropes. Kenta then ELBOWS Goto down, BLASTS Hashi for good measure, then goes back to Goto. Kenta drags Goto up but Goto ROCKS Kenta! Kenta staggers back but BLASTS Hashi again! Kenta then blocks a kick to CLUB Goto’s leg! Kenta whips, Goto reverses and runs in, but into a BOOT!

Kenta runs, but Goto follows and LARIATS Kenta down! The fans fire up while both men are down and crawling for their corners. Hot tag to Hashi! Chase runs in but gets run over! Kenta forearms, Hashi CHOPS! Hashi sends Kenta into Chase, CHOPS Kenta, then mule kicks Chase! Hashi hits a NECKBREAKER on Chase and the fans fire up with him! Hashi runs at Kenta, clotheslines in the corner, then brings Kenta out to suplex, and hold him! The fans cheer and Hashi SLAMS Kenta down at ten! Cover, TWO! Hashi keeps cool and the fans continue to rally. Hashi drags Kenta up, reels him in, and brings him up, only for Kenta to fight free!

Hashi takes a swing, but Kenta spins him around! Hashi goes to suplex again but Kenta knees free! Kenta blocks the superkick to URAKEN! URAKEN! Kenta runs, ducks ‘n’ dodges, but Hashi LARIATS first! Both men are down and the fans rally back up. Hot tags to Chase and Goto! Goto LARIATS Chase first! Goto runs in at the corner to fire forearms, then he whips corner to corner. Goto runs in, MURAMASA, then SAIDO! Cover, TWO! Chase stays in this but the fans rally behind Goto. Goto drags Chase up, fireman’s carries, but Goto fights free! Chase ROCKS Goto, but Goto ROCKS Chase! Chase snarls and comes back to ROCK Goto!

Goto comes back and ROCKS Chase in return! Chase fires another shot, Goto fires a flurry! Chase fires a strike fest, runs, but Goto runs him over! The fans rally, but Kenta runs in with a title belt! The ref reprimands but Goto TOSSES Kenta out first! But Chase has the belt! BELT SHOT!! Cover, Hashi breaks it!! The fans cheer, but Kenta TOSSES Hashi out! Chase gets Goto up, hammerlock and JEWEL HEIST! Cover, Hashi barrels in to break it! Another save from the Head Hunter but Kenta tosses him out! Kenta goes out to CLUB and CHOP Hashi! Chase tucks Goto in, but Goto resists the lift!

Chase still tries, but Goto fights the driver! And then back drops free! Kenta keeps Hashi out as Chase runs to C-TRIGGER! Then fireman’s carry, T K O, THEN CUTTER!! Cover, TWO!! Goto survives and the fans fire up! Chase slashes his throat, vowing to end this now! Chase sits Goto up, POINT-BLANK C-TRIGGER!! Goto falls over from that execution shot, but Chase isn’t done! Chase tucks Goto back in, for a- BLOCKBUSTER from Hashi!! Kenta gets in, spins Hashi around, DDT! Kenta hauls Goto up to fireman’s carry, but Goto slips free! Goto shoves, fireman’s carries, USHIGOROSHI! The fans fire up while all four men are down!

The fans rally as Chase and Goto slowly sit up. Chase crawls over to Goto, brings him around, and fires a forearm! Goto fires one back! Chase fires another forearm, so Goto fires back! Chase throws a haymaker now! Goto throws a forearm, and then both men stand. The forearm skeep going, then Chase BACK ELBOWS! Chase lines up a shot, but Goto blocks the knee! Hashi SUPERKICKS! Goto fireman’s carries Chase, Hashi adds on for FIERCE FLASH into position, but Chase fights free! Chase ELBOWS Hashi, C-TRIGGERS Goto, but Hashi waistlocks! Chase grabs the  ropes, and the ref, too! Chase turns Hashi around so Kenta can CHAIR SHOT Hashi!!

The fans boo as Hashi goes down in a heap and slumps out of the ring. Chase runs up on Goto to BOOT him! Goto wobbles, but Chase runs, only for Goto to follow! Chase PELES knowing that! Goto roars as he stays up, but Chase dodges the lariat, and Kenta gets in to BOOT Goto down! Bullet Club drag Goto up, double whip, but Goto breaks their double clothesline to DOUBLE LARIAT back! The fans fire up as Goto grits his teeth and rises again! Chase is in a corner, Goto runs in, but into BOOTS! Goto roars, Chase runs in, into the HIDDEN GAP! Goto then LARIATS Chase inside-out! Hashi BLASTS Kenta!

Goto drags Chase up, fireman’s carries, G T W! Hashi is on defense while Goto covers, TWO!! Chase survives but the fans fire up! Bishamon drags Chase back up, gets him in position, but Kenta is back with another belt! Chase kicks Hashi away, slips free of Goto’s grip to LOW BLOW!! BUSAIKU KNEE from Kenta! ROLLING JACKKNIFE from Chase! BULLET CLUB WINS!!

Winners: Kenta & Chase Owens, by pinfall (NEW IWGP Heavyweight Tag Team Champions)

By hook and by crook, Kenta & Chase pull off another heist! But now, that makes them and Bishamon 1-1 this year. Will we get a trilogy over these titles as a Summer blockbuster?

Wait, hold on here! The NJPW Strong Openweight Tag Team Champions show up! TMDK’s Shane Haste & Mikey Nicholls storm right up and tell Bullet Club it’s time to go belts for belts! Anyone else getting deja vu about this scenario? Wait! Now El Phantasmo & Hikuleo show up! They’re the former NJPW Strong Openweight AND former IWGP Heavyweight Tag Team Champions! And they want all those belts back! Things have escalated, and Young Lions do their best to get in here and keep the teams apart. So instead of a trilogy, instead of a remake with new actors, are we going to get a massive, star-studded instant classic?

 

NEVER Openweight Championship: Shingo Takagi VS Gabe Kidd!

The Rampaging Dragon has redeemed this championship by saving it from The King of Darkness! However, The Mad Man of the Bullet Club War Dogs claims NJPW has lost its way and that he will help right the ship! Is Gabe simply chasing his own Moby Dick? Or will he be able to tear down Takagi and bring back what made NJPW the king of pro-wrestling?

Gabe continues to parody Takagi, sporting a brand new hooded robe to copy Takagi’s. He also tries to intimidate Takagi by being right up in his face. The ref tells them back down, but they don’t go far. Gabe even pushes Takagi! The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see who truly embodies NEVER!

The bell rings and the fans fire up as the two run in! They RAM shoulders, then fire forearms back and forth! Kidd gets the edge, runs and RAMS Takagi, but Takagi rebounds to RAM Kidd! Kidd rebounds to RAM Takagi, and they RAM shoulders again and again! They both flex and roar, and the fans fire up! Kidd forearms, whips, and runs in to clothesline! Kidd snarls then whips but Takagi reverses. Takagi runs in, blocks a boot, and clotheslines through! The fans rally up and Takagi fires JABS and CHOPS on repeat! JAB, JAB, JAB, but Kidd steps into the shots! Kidd CHOPS and CHOPS and CHOPS, but Takagi pushes him back!

Takagi catches Gabe’s haymaker to spin him, but Kidd suplexes first! The fans fire up while both men are down! Kidd gets up first and BOOTS Takagi right outta the ring! Kidd then goes out after Takagi to HEADBUTT! Kidd CHOPS Takagi, whips him to railing hard, then storms around. The fans rally for Takagi but Kidd storms over to him. Kidd SMACKS Takagi off the apron, but Takagi ELBOWS back! Takagi kicks Kidd, SMACKS him off apron, then CHOPS! Kidd frowns, eggs Takagi on, so Takagi fires a forearm! Kidd fires back, they brawl back and forth, then Takagi ROCKS Kidd with a right hand!

Takagi whips Kidd, Kidd reverses! Takagi hits railing so hard, he messes up the camera on that end! But Takagi just shakes the railing in anger! Kidd hurries to find chairs under the ring! Kidd throws one to Takagi but the ref says no, that’s not this kind of match! But Takagi brushes the ref aside and grabs the chair! He and Kidd CLASH chairs like swords! Kidd disarms Takagi, JAMS him low, then aims to HEADSHOT! Takagi drops back, Kidd hauls him up to EXPLODER to the floor! Takagi and Kidd are both down but the fans fire up! Kidd rises, the ring count starts, and Kidd storms around. Kidd rolls in at 5 of 20, Takagi is still down at 10.

Kidd sits like Shibata while Takagi flounders up to his feet. Takagi staggers in the wrong direction! He’s outside at 17! 18! Takagi slides in safe at 19! But Kidd’s right on him for a suplex, and BRAINBUSTER! Cover, TWO!! Takagi survives and the fans fire up! But Kidd whips Takagi, only for Takagi to fall over in a heap! The ref checks Takagi and Kidd wants this called! The fans rally up for Takagi while he clutches his head. Kidd goes out, gets in Desperado’s face on commentary, but then backs off as Desperado stands up. Kidd goes back to the ring, knowing Desperado can’t do anything to him.

Kidd then brings Takagi up, and CHOPS! Kidd still stares Desperado down, then CHOPS Takagi again. Kidd scuffs Takagi, kicks at him, but Takagi eggs him on. Kidd stands Takagi up to CHOP again! Takagi just gets in Kidd’s face! Kidd CHOPS, Takagi snarls, and Kidd eggs him on. Takagi winds up to CHOP! Kidd staggers away from that shot! The fans fire up and both men steady themselves. Kidd asks via the camera if Clark Connors sees this. Kidd comes back to CHOP! Takagi does feel that one and Kidd eggs him on. Takagi CHOPS and Kidd drops to his knees! Takagi kicks at Kidd now, and Kidd gets up in a huff to CHOP!

Takagi eggs Kidd on, so Kidd CHOPS him on the back! Takagi RIDGE HAND CHOPS! And CHOPS, and CHOPS! Kidd CHOPS, but Takagi just fires up! Takagi CHOPS, Kidd CHOPS, repeat! The fans rally with every CHOP going back and forth! The CHOPS just keep going, but both men are slowing down. Kidd grits his teeth to CHOP again! Takagi JABS! JABS! And JABS! Then CHOP! Kidd growls and feints to BITE Takagi’s forehead! The ref reprimands, the ref tells everyone off, but Takagi LARIATS him down! The fans fire up, and Takagi stands back up. Takagi brings Kidd up to whip and KNEE against ropes!

Takagi runs, Kidd dodges, but into an ELBOW! JAB! YUKON feint to DDT! The fans fire up again and Takagi stands Kidd back up. Takagi suplexes high and hard! Cover, TWO! Takagi looks around, finds the camera, and he says “TOKI GA KITA!” The fans fire up now that it’s time, and they join in on “OI! OI! OI!” Takagi drags Kidd up, but Kidd BITES his forehead again! Kidd tells off all the fans, but Takagi BITES Kidd back! The fans fire up, Kidd runs up but into an ELBOW! JAB! YUKON- SAIDO!! Kidd turns that around and both men are down again! And we’re just 10 minutes into this!

The fans rally but Kidd sits up first. Kidd has a sinister grin as he stands. Kidd winds up, runs, but Takagi gets under the Rebounder to SAIDO! Kidd is back up though! SAIDO! Takagi staggers up, but he gets around! Kidd CLUBS away to stop the suplex, but Takagi runs to ropes and uses those to help the SAIDO! Kidd is dazed and the fans fire up while Takagi rises again. Takagi shakes out the arms, runs in and clotheslines in the corner! Takagi fires up, the fans are with him, and he puts Kidd up top. But Kidd CLUBS Takagi! Takagi climbs to throw headbutts, but Kidd gives them back! Kidd fires more forearms, then has a HANGING GUILLOTINE!!

The ref counts, Kidd drops Takagi to then get him up, for another BRAINBUSTER!! Cover, but Kidd lets up!? Kidd shakes his head and wags his finger. Is this not good enough for him? Kidd puts Takagi in a corner, to ROCK him with a haymaker! Kidd then hoists Takagi up top, to CHOP! Kidd climbs, CLUBS away on Takagi, then goes to the very top! The fans start to worry as Kidd brings Takagi up, for a SUPER DUPER PLEX!! Takagi writhes and Kidd grimaces, but then Takagi rises?! Kidd runs up to BOOT, then runs again, into a BOOT! Kidd swings, into a knee and MADE IN JAPAN!! Cover, TWO!! Kidd survives and the fans are thunderous!

The fans rally while both men are down again. Takagi and Kidd stir, and it’s Takagi that makes his way over to Kidd. Takagi drags Kidd up, pump handles, but Kidd fights the rack! Both men fall back and go to corners. The fans rally as both men slowly rise. Takagi headbutts the buckles to fire up, and Kidd eggs him on! They both run in, DOUBLE LARIATS collide! Neither falls, so DOUBLE LARIATS collide again! And DOUBLE LARIATS collide again! Takagi fires off RIDGE HAND CHOPS, then short arm LARIATS! Kidd stays up!? And he short arm LARIATS in return! Takagi stays up, Kidd talks trash, but Takagi LARIATS!

Kidd still talks trash as he LARIATS back! Takagi LARIATS, Kidd eggs him on, but Takagi’s running out of steam! The fans rally, Kidd LARIATS and LARIATS and LARIATS! Kidd runs, but Takagi follows to LARIAT! Takagi runs, DOUBLE LARIATS collide again! But Takagi ELBOWS! And JABS! Kidd HEADBUTTS! Takagi HEADBUTTS! Kidd PALM STRIKES, Takagi JABS, Kidd DISCUS LARIATS! Cover, ONE?!?! Kidd doesn’t question it, he just runs! Into a LARIAT! Takagi runs, to PUMPING BOMBER!! Takagi roars and the fans are thunderous! Takagi hauls Kidd right up, to pump handle, but Kidd turns that into a PILEDRIVER!! Takagi SLIDING D?!!?

The fans are thunderous as both men are defying expectations! Takagi and Kidd sit up and give junkyard dog headbutts. Kidd then forearms, but Takagi responds. They start throwing SLAP after SLAP, but Takagi gives HEADBUTT after HEADBUTT! Takagi brings Kidd up for boxing elbows! The fans rally with every shot, but Kidd SLAPS, SLAPS and SLAPS with those palm strikes! Kidd still talks trash about fighting spirit, and dares Takagi to show him, so Takagi DECKS him!! Takagi roars, drags Kidd up, and pump handles, for the LAST- NO, Kidd slips free to ripcord and PALM STRIKE!

Kidd HEADBUTTS, but both men stagger around! Kidd reels Takagi back in, PILEDRIVER!! But he’s too dizzy to cover!! Kidd wobbles and hobbles and flops over again! The fans are thunderous as Kidd flounders, finds Takagi and covers, TWO!!! Takagi is still in this, perhaps saved by the delay! The fans rally as both men stir, Kidd drags Takagi up but then staggers away. Kidd shakes his head, refusing to let his own body fail him. Kidd storms up on Takagi as we pass 20 minutes, and he brings Takagi up. Kidd DOUBLE CHOPS Takagi on the back, but that awoke the Dragon! Kidd SLAPS him! And lifts, but Takagi RANAS free!!

Takagi ELBOWS! Kidd UPPERCUTS! Takagi JABS! And HEADBUTTS!! Then SLIDING LARIAT! Kidd’s right up!? He and Takagi run, dodge, REBOUNDING BOMBER?!? Takagi gets Kidd with his own move, then tucks him in for a TAKAGI DRIVER 98!!! Cover, TWO?!?!? Kidd survives and the fans are thunderous again! Takagi roars and the fans fire up again! Takagi drags Kidd up, but Kidd shoves him back, and SPITS at him! So Takagi SLIDING D! Then Takagi hauls Kidd up, pump handle, LAST OF THE DRAGON!!!! Cover, Takagi wins!!

Winner: Shingo Takagi, by pinfall (still NEVER Openweight Champion)

Kidd got the fight he wanted, as both men NEVER gave in! But in the end, it was still Takagi’s win! Kidd may not be the one restoring NJPW to what it was, but will Takagi carry that banner for him?

 

IWGP Global Heavyweight Championship: Nic Nemeth VS David Finlay w/ Gedo!

The Wanted Man won the dream match he always wanted by trumping President Ace, Hiroshi Tanahashi, but then The Rebel had to ruin the fun! Nemeth gave Finlay this match so they could settle things once and for all, will Nemeth have two wins in one weekend? Or will Finlay get what he wants in taking this title back?

As Nemeth makes his entrance, Finlay attacks! They brawl on the ramp and fans fire up! Nemeth runs Finlay down the ramp, SMACKS him off the apron, but Finlay kicks him low! Finlay reels Nemeth in but Nemeth back drops him away! The ref reprimands them both but Nemeth sends Finlay into railing! Finlay flounders away but Nemeth gets him up to POST him! Finlay staggers and falls back while Nemeth takes off his jacket. Nemeth stands Finlay up to ROCK with a haymaker, but Finlay kicks low and throws hands back! Finlay RAMS Nemeth into railing! The ref tells them to get this in the ring but Finlay ROCKS Nemeth!

Finlay comes back but Nemeth throws body shots! Nemeth puts Finlay in and fans cheer as this is finally a match. Finlay stands but Nemeth scrapes laces off his face! Finlay flounders away, Nemeth has him in a corner, then SCRAPES Finlay’s face on the ropes! The ref reprimands, Nemeth throws body shots in a corner, then he HEADBUTTS Finlay. Finlay sits down, the fans cheer, and Nemeth drags Finlay up to again scrape laces off the face! Nemeth then CHOKES Finlay on the ropes! The ref counts, Nemeth throws Finlay away, and the fans cheer again. Nemeth looms over Finlay, brings him up, then bumps him off buckles.

Nemeth throws forearms on Finlay, then a ROLLING- FLAPJACK off buckles! Finlay turns things around as Nemeth now writhes. Finlay rains down fists but the ref counts. Finlay lets off but shoves the ref down! The fans boo while Finlay taunts them and says he DGAF! Finlay TOSSES Nemeth out, throws up the Too Sweet, then goes out to RAM Nemeth into the railing! No Man’s Land disappears, but then Finlay RAMS Nemeth back in! The fans rally for Nemeth while Finlay looms over him. The ref reprimands, Finlay says okay, he’ll get this inside. Finlay puts Nemeth in the ring, the fans applaud, and then Finlay covers, ONE!

The fans cheer, but Finlay digs his knuckles into Nemeth’s ribs! The ref counts, Finlay lets off, and Nemeth flounders to ropes. Finlay storms up on Nemeth, CHOKES him in the ropes, then CLUBS him down! Gedo likes it but the fans boo. The ref has Finlay back off, and Nemeth sits up. Finlay drags Nemeth up to whip him hard into a corner! Nemeth falls back, Finlay stacks for a cover, TWO! The fans rally for Nemeth but Finlay stalks him to ropes. Finlay drags Nemeth up to suplex and BROKEN ARROW! Nemeth writhes, Finlay flexes and mocks the HBK pose. The fans boo so Finlay flips them off from the corner.

Finlay watches Nemeth go to a corner, and he hops down. Finlay barks and runs corner to corner to UPPERCUT! Then clothesline! Finlay reels Nemeth in, but Nemeth slips free of the Irish Curse for the OLYMPIC SLAM! The fans fire up while both men are down! Nemeth and Finlay writhe, and Nemeth rises first. The fans rally but Gedo coaches Finlay. Nemeth fires off on Finlay with fast and furious fists, then HEADBUTT after HEADBUTT! The ref gets Nemeth to stop but the fans fire up with him! Nemeth bumps Finlay off buckles, brings him around, and bumps him off more buckles! The fans applaud and Nemeth CLAWS Finlay’s face!

The ref counts, Nemeth lets off at 4, then he brings Finlay around, to bump off even more buckles! Nemeth SPLASHES then turns Finlay for a NECKBREAKER! Nemeth then drops ELBOW after ELBOW after ELBOW! The fans clap along with every ELBOW! Nemeth goes to nine, then aims to JUMPING ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO! Nemeth drags Finlay over to a drop zone, then goes outside. Nemeth climbs up the corner, and MACHO ELBOWS! Cover, TWO! Finlay survives but he coughs and sputters for air. Nemeth stalks Finlay, brings him back up, and whips. Finlay reverses to TACKLE Nemeth out of the ring!

Both men are down on the floor and the fans rally up again. The ref checks, both men are able to continue, and Finlay drags Nemeth up. Finlay fireman’s carries, to TOSS and POST him! Nemeth tumbles away but Finlay stalks him. The ref reprimands Finlay and wants this in the ring, but Finlay takes a lap around the ring to come in red hot! But Nemeth moves and Finlay CRASHES through the gate! The fans go wild seeing Finlay tumble, and then insult to injury, some railing falls over on his face! The ref checks, both men are still able to continue, so a ring count starts. Nemeth and Finlay stir at 5 of 20, and Finlay crawls over to ringside at 10.

Nemeth flounders around, drags himself up with railing at 13, but both men are still outside at 15! Finlay is crawling, Nemeth is floundering, we hit 18! Both men spring in at 19.5! The fans cheer as this match will continue! Nemeth and Finlay stir, and Gedo pounds the mat. The fans rally, too, and both men grab at each other. Finlay throws a haymaker, Nemeth gives it back! They go back and forth, rising to their feet with each shot. Finlay UPPERCUTS, but Nemeth HAYMAKERS! UPPERCUT! HAYMAKER! UPPERCUT! HAYMAKER! Finlay rebounds to forearm, Nemeth fires off a flurry! Nemeth eggs Finlay on so Finlay SLAPS him!

Finlay runs and LARIATS! Cover, TWO!! Nemeth survives but Finlay hurries INTO OBLIVION!! Cover, TWO!?! Nemeth survives and Finlay is furious, but the fans are fired up! Finlay drags Nemeth up, reels him in, and hoists him up, but Nemeth slips free to a SLEEPER! Nemeth has the body scissors, he’s a backpack on Finlay weighing him down! Finlay drops to his knees, then to the mat! Finlay is flailing, fading, and Gedo is freaking out! Nemeth thrashes around, the ref checks Finlay! The arm drops once! But then Finlay comes back to life! Finlay rises, crawls to a corner, ROPEBREAK, but he keeps climbing!

The fans rally as Finlay goes up higher and higher! SUPER BACKPACK SENTON! Finlay is free but both men are down! The fans rally again as both men stir. Finlay spots Nemeth, crawls his way over, and then drags him up. Nemeth is dead weight, but Finlay just tries again. Finlay says Nemeth is done, and he lifts for a POWER- FAMOUSER!! Cover, TWO!! Nemeth stuns Finlay but Finlay surprises Nemeth, and the fans rally up again! Nemeth runs up, but Finlay bucks the Danger Zone! But Nemeth ducks the boot! The ROLLING ELBOW hits, but Nemeth SUPERKICKS in return!! Cover, TWO!!! The fans fire up again as Finlay survives Superkick 101!

Finlay and Nemeth flounder as we pass 15 minutes. Finlay goes to ropes, stands back up, DANGER- BUCKLE BOMB! Finlay reels Nemeth in for a POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO!! Nemeth survives but Finlay doesn’t let off! POWERBOMB!! And then a flip over, into OVERKILL!!! Cover, Finlay wins!!

Winner: David Finlay, by pinfall (NEW IWGP Global Heavyweight Champion)

The Rebel redeems himself by taking back the belt made just for him! Gedo personally brings the belt back to him, and Bullet Club has more gold in the treasury! Will Finlay prove he’s the Goatslayer by taking down more greats from around the world?

 

IWGP World Heavyweight Championship: Jon Moxley VS Ren Narita!

The Maniac shocked a lot of people when he came out of the Windy City Riot on top of NJPW’s mountain. And while he made it past “Powerhouse” Will Hobbs in AEW, he’s following through on his promise to accept all challenges, from the young and the old! The House of Torture’s #SOULEDOUT Son of Strong Style took Moxley up on that, will Moxley regret being a fighting champion? Or will he still head towards Resurgence and a showdown with Shota Umino?

Moxley makes his entrance from the crowd as usual, only to get attacked but Yoshinobu Kanemaru & Sho at ringside! The House of Torture always has to have the upper hand, even if it’s through underhanded means! The fans boo but Narita laughs. Narita goes out after Moxley, but Shota shows up to fight off the House! But the numbers are still in the House’s favor, and Kanemaru WHISKEY MISTS Shota! Narita has a facelock on Moxley while Kanemaru & Sho mug Shota, then Narita SMACKS Moxley off the apron! Kanemaru & Sho drag Shota to the ramp while fans tell them to go home, and Narita grabs a chair so he can CHOKE Moxley with it!

Red Shoes does what he can to get this madness to stop, and Narita lets off. But wait, Sho & Kanemaru are handcuffing Shota! Narita stomps Moxley, Kanemaru stomps Shota! Sho has a chair, and he HEADSHOTS Shota! Shota flops over, Kanemaru and Narita mug Moxley in the ring! Sho joins in on that, and then Sho & Kanemaru double whip! But Moxley DOUBLE LARIATS! Narita has the chair, Moxley kicks low first! Moxley then takes the chair to CHUCK it at Shota! Now the bell rings, and this main event is officially underway! Moxley goes out, brings Narita around, and whips him into railing! And then more railing!

The fans rally as Moxley uses a facelock to drag Narita into No Man’s Land, then DECKS him into the crowd area! The fans fire up as Moxley rains down fists on Narita, right in front of them! Moxley BITES Narita’s forehead! Moxley lets off, drags Narita up, and Young Lions have fans be careful as Moxley drags Narita back to ringside. Moxley RAILING BACK SUPLEXES! Narita hobbles, Moxley puts him in the ring, and the fans cheer. Moxley climbs up in a corner, and he rains down fists! The fans count along, and Moxley goes all the way to TEN, then to SIXTEEN! The fans cheer, and Moxley drags Narita to the apron.

We see Young Lions carrying the handcuffed and unconscious Shota to the back, he won’t be able to help anymore tonight. Moxley has Narita in, but Sho’s still here! Sho anchors Moxley, Red Shoes reprimands, but then Moxley SLAPS Sho down! But that lets Narita BOOT Moxley down! Narita then runs to FLYING KNEE STOMP! Narita grins while fans boo, and Narita whips Moxley hard into railing! Moxley staggers out into No Man’s Land, leans on some railing, but Narita snatches that away to JAM him and SMACK him with it! Moxley staggers away, back to ringside, and Narita puts him in the ring for some stomps.

Moxley eggs Narita on, even SPITS at him, but Narita CLAWS the eyes! Red Shoes reprimands, Narita lets off, and Narita stands Moxley up to SCRAPE along the ropes! Red Shoes reprimands but Narita goes all the way to another corner before he lets off. Narita CHOPS Moxley, then CHOPS again! Moxley eggs him on, Narita CHOPS! Moxley CHOPS and fires forearms! Moxley even puts Narita’s shirt over his face so he can’t see the CHOP! Moxley pulls the shirt up and over so he can CHOP again, and again! Moxley whips corner to corner, Narita reverses, Moxley hits buckles and drops down, so Narita KNEE DROPS right on him!

Narita takes his shirt completely off, throws it down at Moxley, then drags him up. Narita suplexes high and hard! Cover, TWO! The fans rally while Moxley grits his teeth. Narita drags Moxley up, TOSSES him out, and Moxley goes to railing. Narita goes out and CLAWS Moxley’s eyes, then whips him into railing! Moxley slumps down, Narita stands him back up, and Narita brings him out to the crowd again. The Young Lions have fans move aside as Narita CLUBS Moxley. Narita BOWLS Moxley into chairs! Not quite a strike, but Narita picks up the spare as he BOWLS Moxley again! Narita then leaves Moxley behind while fans rally.

Moxley takes a fan’s water bottle to drink and even splash himself with. Moxley stands and staggers his way towards ringside, but Narita JAMS him up with a chair! And SMACKS him on the back! The fans boo while Moxley hobbles his way back to ringside, but Narita taunts him. Narita grins as he pushes Moxley into the ring, then drags him onto the apron. Narita CLUBS away on Moxley, then goes up to stomp him. Narita KNEE DROPS, then gets in Red Shoes’ face. This lets Sho & Kanemaru CHOKE Moxley! The fans boo but The House gets away with another one. Narita then has the legs for a ROPE GUILLOTINE!

Moxley coughs and sputters, Narita shoves him around, then Narita covers. Red Shoes refuses, too many shenanigans! The fans cheer but Narita is upset! Narita goes back for Moxley, drags him up and CLUBS him on the neck! And CLUBS him again! Moxley snarls, Narita fires a forearm, but Moxley fires back! Narita fires another forearm so Moxley fires back! Narita fires a flurry and Moxley wobbles! Narita ROCKS Moxley, runs, but Moxley TOSSES him out! The fans fire up but Narita hurries back in, into a CURB STOMP! Shoutout to the Visionary! Moxley sits down while Narita flops to the floor.

Moxley gets up, says a quick prayer, and then DIVES! Direct hit and Narita goes over railing! The fans fire up while even Moxley is stuck on the railing, and messing up a camera feed. Red Shoes checks, both men are okay to continue, and the fans rally up. Moxley has the title belt right in front of him, that motivates him to rise to his feet! Moxley snarls, goes looking under the ring, and he brings out a TABLE! And then another table! Moxley sets those tables up ringside, and surely American fans would be loving this! Moxley hobbles around, he may have taken more damage from that dive than he thought. But he just gets mad and finishes setting the tables.

Moxley hobbles his way back to where he left Narita, drags him up and over railing, and then uses a facelock to bring him over to the tables. Moxley throws hands to make Narita rest back. Moxley DIGS his fingers in, then ROCKS Narita. Moxley hobbles, grimaces, but fires up as the fans rally again. Moxley goes up a corner, but Kanemaru distracts Red Shoes so Sho can attack! Moxley grabs at Sho but Narita ROCKS Moxley first! Narita goes up after Moxley, Desperado is about to leave commentary at this rate, but Moxley CLAWS Narita’s back! Moxley ROCKS Narita, both men go to the apron, but Narita catches MOxley!

Moxley fires elbows to fight the clinch! Moxley clinches, and he URENAGES Narita through the tables!! The fans and commentary all lose their minds, and Moxley flips Narita off! The House protests but what do they know about fair? Moxley gets back in the ring as the fans rally and the ring count starts. Narita is conscious in the wreckage but even he seems unsure if he can move. Moxley doesn’t let the count get past 7 before he goes out to drag Narita from the wreckage, and he puts Narita in. The fans cheer the savagery and the sportsmanship, and Moxley takes a moment to breathe before he gets back inside the ring.

Narita flounders all the way to the far corner, but Moxley pounds the mat. The fans rally up again as Moxley runs in, but into a BOOT! Moxley clotheslines! Moxley runs but Narita follows to JUMP KICK! Narita runs back in, into a KING KONG LARIAT! The fans fire up while both men are down! Kanemaru & Sho coach Narita as he stirs, but Moxley rises first. Moxley slaps some sense back into himself but he still clutches his side. Moxley gets Narita up for the X PLEX! Cover, TWO!! Narita is still in this but Moxley says fine! Moxley tells the House to watch this! DRAGON STOMPS! Shoutout to Bryan Danielson and the fans fire up!

Moxley seethes, we pass 15 minutes, and Moxley calls his shot. Moxley drags Narita up, underhooks, but Narita wrenches out! Narita CHOKES Moxley, and brings him down to the mat! Red Shoes reprimands and counts, Narita lets off at 4. Narita falls back to the blue corner, and he grabs his push-up bar! Red Shoes reprimands, the fans boo, but Narita shoves Red Shoes away! Moxley dodges the push-up bar shot to have a SLEEPER!! Narita flails, grabs at Red Shoes, shoves him to a corner then RAMS Moxley into Red Shoes! And then the House attacks! The fans boo as Sho & Kanemaru stomp him down!

Desperado has had it! He gets off commentary and grabs a piece of wood! Despy SMACKS Kanemaru with it, then blocks Sho’s attack with the same piece of wood! Then Desperado SMACKS Sho in the head with the wood! The Rogue Luchador clears the ring of Heel Master and Murder Machine and the fans cheer! Desperado even headlocks them both to bring them away! Now Moxley and Narita are alone, but Narita has the push-up bar! PUSH-UP BAR SHOT!! The fans boo as Narita still gets away with one! Narita laughs as he gets Red Shoes back in and covers Moxley, TWO!!! Moxley survives and the fans are thunderous!

Narita is furious with Red Shoes’ count, but then vows to end it now! But Moxley hits a CUTTER!! Outta nowhere like a Viper! The fans rally up again as Moxley rises. Moxley storms up on Narita, slaps him around, eggs him on, and Narita stands. Narita fires a forearm, so Moxley gives it back! Narita fires another, but Moxley fires back! They go back and forth, forearm for forearm! Moxley gets the edge as he ROCKS Narita again and again! Narita CHOKES Moxley, but Moxley breaks free to ROLLING ELBOW! Moxley runs, but into a SLEEPER! Moxley fades, but then fires back up! The fans rally as Moxley reaches out!

Moxley works towards ropes but Narita shifts things into a COBRA TWIST! Moxley endures, the fans rally, but Narita thrashes around! Moxley keeps fighting forward, ROPEBREAK! Narita lets go in frustration, we hit 20 minutes, and Narita waistlocks! Moxley still holds ropes, so Narita CLAWS the eyes! Then GERMAN SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO!! Narita growls and storms back up on Moxley to clinch, BLIZZARD PLEX! Bridging cover, TWO!! Moxley survives again and Narita seethes. Narita BOOTS Moxley down, then laughs as he goes outside. Narita climbs a corner, takes aim, but Moxley runs up to ROCK him first!

Moxley climbs, throws hands, then CLAWS Narita’s back! Moxley then brings Narita right up for a SUPERPLEX! Both men are down and the fans fire back up! Moxley crawls his way over, covers, TWO!! Narita is still in this but Moxley hasn’t lost his focus yet. Moxley throws HAMMER ‘N’ ANVIL ELBOWS! The Blackpool Combat Club special! Moxley then clamps on a SLEEPER, but Narita powers him right into a corner! Red Shoes got outta the way in time! Moxley turns things around to snapmare and BULLY CHOKE!! But then the lights go out!? Oh no, the House is at it again! Fans boo as we can’t see anything!

When the lights come up, Red Shoes is down! Evil & Dick Togo are here, and they mug Moxley! Fans boo as they stomp Moxley down! Evil soaks up the heat while the fans tell them to go home! Evil & Dick then go back for Moxley, drag him up, and hit MAGIC KILLER!! The fans boo while Evil goes looking for things, and Dick uses the SPOILER CHOKER on Moxley! Moxley says you’re not gonna take him alive! Evil gets a chair, and he runs up to JAM Moxley low! Moxley sputters and coughs, but wait! SHOTA’S BACK! Shota SHOTGUNS Dick, but Evil kicks and whips! Shota stops himself to drop toehold Evil onto ropes!

Shota hurries over, SLINGSHOT DDT to the apron! Then Shota goes up to MISSILE DORPKICK Dick! Then he goes outside to CANNONBALL Evil! The fans fire up with Shota as he tells Moxley-shishou to stand and fight! But Narita runs up with his push-up bar! Shota dodges, then feeds Narita to a DDT! The fans fire up as Moxley drags Narita back up! We pass 25 minutes as Shota helps Red Shoes back in! Moxley hits a DEATH RIDER!! Cover, Moxley wins!!

Winner: Jon Moxley, by pinfall (still IWGP World Heavyweight Champion)

The Roughneck helps his Maniac mentor thwart the House of Torture! Will Narita have to learn the hard way that cheating doesn’t pay? The House retreats, with Evil giving a lingering glare to Shota, who is still wearing the cuffs! The chain is gone, and Desperado confirms, he used bolt cutters to break the chain.

As for Moxley, he shakes his protege’s hand, and is then presented the belt by Hayato Maeda. Moxley bows in respect, then holds up the belt. Moxley also does photo ops with Maeda, and even gives him a noogie and pretend punches. After that, Moxley gets the mic. The fans cheer, and he takes a moment to bow deeply in thanks to everyone. “Fukuoka, I love you all. But I promise you one thing. No matter what happens out here, no matter what the odds, no matter what the challenge, no matter how bad the odds are stacked against me like tonight, I will fight until my dying breath!” The fans cheer, the streamers fly, and Moxley is ready for Shota and Resurgence!

Moxley makes sure Shota understands, there is respect, but there will also be no holding back. Shota nods and they will meet in one week’s time, in the Toyota Arena in California! Will Moxley hold onto the gold in the Golden State? Or will it be the moment Shota brings about his own Paradigm Shift?


My Thoughts:

A great night two for Wrestling Dontaku, lots of matches on this one. I did not expect Kenta & Chase to take the tag titles back, but then they also threw more challengers at this than I expected. They had a Triple Threat for the Heavyweight and Openweight tag titles, this clearly looks to be a Fatal 4 Way in the making. If this were WWE or AEW, it might be in a Ladder match, but even a standard Fatal 4 Way would be amazing given the four teams here. And at this point, any team could win this, but it’d feel silly if Bishamon just won everything back. I’d personally want to see TMDK get all the gold as they’ve put in great work for years now.

Awesome match from Takagi and Kidd for the NEVER title. I thought Kidd was going to win that belt given how much he was shouting about restoring NJPW’s strong style spirit, but it also makes sense for Bullet Club to split even tonight. Kenta & Chase won, Kidd lost, because then Finlay won. That was a bit surprising to me, too, as I thought Nemeth was going to keep his reign going. But at the same time, it was surprising Finlay lost it in the first place. That makes Finlay and Nemeth 1-1 so maybe we get another rematch down the line. And then great main event, but of course The House of Torture interfered, and of course Moxley retained even with that.

Now Resurgence is coming, and I said before that it feels like Shota is being skyrocketed to the top, but who knows. I suppose Moxley could keep the belt and face more AEW stars, but all those matches would be foregone conclusions. I just feel like NJPW and AEW have used their partnerships in hopes of getting both more recognition in the other’s market, but it also feels like they’ve booked themselves into a corner.

My Score: 8.8/10


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Mitchell’s ROH Death Before Dishonor Results & Report! (7/26/24)

YEEHAW!

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The word of the day is, “Gold!”

ROH brings Death Before Dishonor to Texas, and makes it bigger than ever! SIX championship matches, how drastically will the landscape change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – MXM Collection VS Spanish Announce Project; wins.
  • Komander VS The Beast Mortos; wins.
  • Texas Deathmatch: Leyla Hirsch VS Diamante; wins.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championship Qualifier: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS The Dark Order; wins and advances to Battle of the Belts 11.
  • ROH World Tag Team Championships: The Kingdom VS Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O’Reilly; win(s) and
  • ROH World Television Championship Survival of the Fittest: Atlantis Jr. VS Lio Rush VS Shane Taylor VS Johnny TV VS Lee Johnson VS Brian Cage; wins and
  • ROH Pure Championship: Wheeler Yuta VS Lee Moriarty; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship: Billie Starkz VS Red Velvet; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Championship: Athena VS Queen Aminata; wins and
  • ROH World Championship: Mark Briscoe VS Roderick Strong; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 7.25.2024

Slammiversary Fallout! Where do things go on the way to Victory Road?

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Well now we start the fall out of Slammiversary. Josh Alexander in his bad bitch summer, X-Speedball legacy, ABC got the t-a-g and Jordynne is still in charge of the Knockouts division. Like I said at the end of Slammiversary, all of the champions being Babyfaces is stupid. They need to drop a couple titles fairly quickly, because I don’t care what some people say, Nic Nemeth ain’t gonna bring any eyes to the brand. He’s about as hot as day old Hamburger Helper over a camping sterno.

We’ll probably open with the luke warm champion, so tune in like 10 minutes late for anything of substance to be happen.

https://x.com/i/status/1816629254349533588

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner: Maclin wins via KIA – *
  • AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan: AJ wins via Down Payment – **
  • Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young): Hammer Your ASH wins via Torture Rack – ** 1/2
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey): Broken Alphabet wins via Twist & Splash – ***

 

Results:

Nemeth gives the ole “I’ll be a fighting champion…blah blah” promo and drops the “any company” line that we’ve already understood what that means. Campaign Singh cuts him off…and I never thought I’d be happy for Campaign Singh to walk out and say anything…ever. And…Mustafa’s promo is worse than Dolph’s. He’s gone from parody to caricature even saying “it was the biggest screw job Montreal ever saw”. Like some of these lines are cheap heat, but most are just brain dead comments that wouldn’t get a reaction out of anyone (and the crowd was silent for that comment). Mustafa gets caught in an Archer “phrasing” moment about getting screwed hard, but this is painful. Promos written by 14 year olds everyone…

This ends with Ali challenging Nemeth for the World Title. While I’m not against walk up challenges, I watch Japanese wrestling, I don’t really get the point aside from doing it just to do it. 

ABC and Matt Hardy have a small promo, and I’m still not really a fan of Unbroken Matt Version 6.0. The floating between Broken voice and his normal voice sounds amateurish.

OH LOOK, finally a match 20 minutes into the show. And it’s my son Steve Maclin! OH CHRIST he’s facing Deaner. This has been 25 minutes of talking followed by the worst god damn attempt at a gimmick. Deaner’s little “Papa Santino told me I can wipe my ass only if the crowd agrees”. This gimmick should die in a fire.

Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner

Deaner started off quick because Maclin was in disbelief that Deaner was actually gonna fight him. Maclin dodges a Crossbody, Busaiku Knee, and just starts beating on Deaner for fun. And this is fun, maybe Maclin can make sure Deaner gets stretchered out and written off forever. How do you call for an ambulance in French? Maclin with the old Back Breaker into a stretch. Deaner tries to nerd rage up, breaks the Back Breaker Stretch, his punch combo, into a Manhattan Drop and Bulldog. Deaner hits the Crossbody, but Maclin kicks out. This is entirely too competitive.

Deaner goes for the Deaner DDT, blocked, Olympic Slam into Splashing Deaner into the corner, Caught in the Crosshairs, K-I-A, thanks for coming you damn dweeb. Stay in Canada and don’t travel Deaner, please.

https://x.com/i/status/1816633784537874761

AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan

As the bell sounds, Sami knocks Rich off the apron, Low Bridges AJ, does the Beats of the Bodhran on AJ and then AJ eats the offense and strategizes with his crew. Bishop and Rich swarm the ring, Sami allows himself to get distracted so AJ slides in and starts beating on Sami. AJ throats Sami across the middle rope and Rich makes his presence felt, AJ distracts the referee and Rich gets in a lot of cheap shots. Bishop throws Sami back in the ring, and AJ keeps up the pressure. Lots of 5 count chokes and leverage moves. After the commercial break ends, Sami dodges a Tennessee Whiskey Knee, gets in a few shots before Rich trips Sami as he’s setting up a Dive, and then AJ takes advantage of the position and hits the goofball knee strike.

AJ calls for his Chokeslam, Sami tries to break it with Axe Handles, then claws the eyes. Sami goes for a Scoop Slam, gets him part way up and then falls over. AJ Chokeslam again, but he bites his hand and starts fighting back. Launches himself at AJ, sends him bouncing off the ropes and uses the momentum to hit that Scoop Slam that was teased earlier. Sami goes for a Western Lariat but eats a Big Boot. AJ does a little Hulk Hogan pose to signal a Leg Drop, but Sami dodges and then connects on a Sliding Lariat. Thumbs Up, Thumbs….interference. Rich distracts the ref, Bishop lays out Sami, AJ connects with the Down Payment.

Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young)

ASH and Jordynne exchange slaps and then Jordynne starts to out muscle ASH. Spinebuster from Jordynne, Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights off, rope run, Sattelite DDT into both tagging out. EY does the Flair corner flop, slides back in between Hammer’s legs, and connects on a Neckbreaker. EY is the quicker of the two, but Hammer finally gets his hands on him and a Release Belly to Belly into a full mount raining of fists, then a near fall. Hammer smashes EY in a corner, Arm Wringer into an Irish Whip across, but EY moves and Hammer tags out to ASH. ASH levels Jordynne, peppers EY with a few shots and pulls him back to their corner and starts some tandem offense with Hammerman. Hammer Guerilla Presses ASH and throws her into EY for a near fall. Hammer looks to aim for either a Powerbomb or Nightmare Pendulum, but EY drops it into a Small Package, pinfall kick out, they both run, Double Lariat spot. The Knockouts get tagged in.

Jordynne is in control early, World’s Strongest Slam into a Vader Bomb. Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights it off and tags out to Hammer. Jordynne and EY do some schoolyard stuff with the old Push while Jordynne is down to trip Hammer. All four get in, ASH gets leveled, EY gets leveled, Hammer and Jordynne have a brief face off, but Hammer throws Jordynne to the apron and ASH connects with a Meteora from the apron. Death Valley Driver from Young on Hammer, ASH stares in shock, EY tells her to get, ASH runs away. EY goes up for his Macho Elbow, and ASH causes him to fall to Hammer’s feet, Torture Rack, and EY submits.

Josh Alexander comes out, with new heel music. And it’s not that bad, definitely better than some other people’s new music. Josh yells at the crowd a bit, says he can’t wait til he’s back in a real Canadian town, like his home of Toronto. Then he drops the mic in lieu of an explanation. The crowd chants him off with the “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey”. 

https://x.com/i/status/1816647373654724937

The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey)

JDC and Hardy start, but JDC quickly tags out to Myers and that doesn’t go well. Hardy grabs a hold of Myers, a few Delete chops, drags him to his corner and they all get in a few shots punctuated with Hardy getting tagged back in and an Elbow into Myers’ extended and worked on left arm. Myers stays isolated, back into the corner, Boot to the gut, Ace tags in and wallops Myers. Ace connects on Double Kicks, into Russian Leg Sweep and his half of Click Click Boom, for a 2 count. Myers finally gets free with a Jaw Breaker and tags out to Eddie. But The System gets no momentum, Ace stifles Eddie’s offense and starts a few quick tags with him and Bey for tandem offense. Moose finally comes down the ramp as Eddie kicked out of yet another pinfall attempt because The System has had nothing going for them. Eddie finally gets some offense since Moose was a big enough distraction.

Eddie thinks they have a spot, so he tags back in JDC, but The ABC stop him cold, tag in Matt Hardy, and Matt walks down JDC, but JDC Low Bridges. Matt is on the outside, so all of The System surrounds Hardy, then Joe Hendry’s music hits! That stops the heel beatdown, and we follow Hendry’s entire entrance. So that proves Hendry is bigger than the 8 other people in this frame. Not really sure if that’s optics you want to push along. Ace and JDC try to remind people there’s wrestling going on, but JDC thumbs the eye to get a little something going. Vertical Suplex for a near fall, tag out for Eddie and Eddie lights up Ace with some of those NOAH Chops. Ace retreats to the ropes and Alisha chokes him with the ropes while the ref is distracted.

Myers gets tagged in, Ace tries to use the crowd energy, Myers stops it at first but then Ace slips a Scoop Slam and tags out to Bey. Hot tag, strike rush, Double Stomp, educated feet, Leap Frog to the corner but Lish climbs on the apron and yells at Bey which stops his rhythm. Myers kicks his feet out and causes Bey to crash. Eddie tags in for a few shots, then to JDC and Slingshot Knees, Wringer Snapmare, Bow and Arrow Submission, and JDC is just doing solid wrestling work right now. Uppercut between the Shoulder Blades as Bey tries to get out, tag to Myers and Bey is still eating offense. Eddie tags in, Bey tries the Sunset Flip, but Eddie tags out before going over, so Myers folds up Bey for a near fall and then tags out to JDC who connects on a Standing Suplex, slams Bey’s face into the corner, Eddie tags in, and Bey finally fights up to his feet, Eddie just flatten Bey’s comeback, tries a Tiger Driver but eats an Enzuigiri for a simultaneous tag. JDC and Hardy come in, JDC tries to exit halfway in, but Hardy is wrecking shop. He disposes of Eddie, Myers slides in but eats a tandem Neckbreaker/DDT from Hardy. Face team does the Delete Corner Face Smashes. Poetry in Motion into a Side Effect into Corkscrew Swanton for only 2 since Myers breaks it up! Everyone throwing hands, referee is distracted, Moose comes in to Spear Hardy, but Hardy dodges and throws him into JDC (I get the call back), Hendry then lays out Moose with the big Lariat. Twist of Fate from Hardy, Splash from Bey, Broken Alphabet wins!

 

Overall Score: 4/10

Ugh, cliche promos, too damn much talking, a competitive squash match with an imbecile as our first “match”, into an overbooked and slow heel match, finally a decent tag match (with the right team going over), into another overbooked match with a “tease” for the mystery backup being more obvious than Jericho’s WWF debut.

Aside from the afore mentioned tag match, The Rascalz promo and The System Promo; this was hard to watch. A lot of cornball promos, Rosemary licks her conspiracy board, storylines got zero traction. Whoopity Doo, Ryan Nemeth got a match next week and we get an undead wedding.

While this was a bad episode, it was bad by at least new standards. We’re not back in the TNA Dark Days again, but this was…a useless show.


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