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Joe’s Weekly CMLL Review & Results (9/9/2018)

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CMLL Coverage

CMLL is back with their weekly show, which means Joe is here to review it!

CMLL Monday Arena Puebla Show

Arkalis, Tigre Rojo Jr, and Black Tiger vs Rey Apocalipsis, Police Man, and Toro Bill Jr

It’s our CMLL opener, and Police Man and Arkalis start off and they start with some mat wrestling, exchanging holds. Black Tiger and Apocalipsis come in and they exchange holds and do some chain wrestling. Tigre Rojo gets in there with Toro Bill and they start to pick up the pace. Arkalis and Black Tiger pin Police man and Rey Apocalipsis with hurricanranas. First Fall: Arkalis pins Rey Apocalipsis with a hurricanrana.

Police Man and Black Tiger start off the second fall. They exchange a few chops to the chest, and then continue a fast pace. Black Tiger feigns a dive to the outside. This brings Apocalipsis and Arkalis in. The same happens with Arkalis feigning a dive, but then he hits a hurricanrana to the outside, this brings in Tigre Rojo and Toro Bill. Chaos breaks out with all of them in the ring. Arkalis starts to get double teamed. He’s hit with a fireman’s carry, then a splash from the top by Police Man for the second fall. Second Fall: Police Man pins Arkalis with a top rope splash.

Tigre Rojo and Apocalipsis start out, but shortly after Arkalis starts to get double teamed. They’re all in the ring now doing spots. They all hit dives from the top. Black Tiger hit a splash, Arkalis hit a leg drop, and Tigre Rojo hit a 450 on Toro Bill for the win. Third Fall: Tigre Rojo pins Toro Bill with a 450.

Winners: Arkalis, Tigre Rojo Jr, and Black Tiger

El Audaz, Fuego, and Stigma vs Virus, Distrubio, and Cancerbero

Stigma starts out with Disturbio, and they don’t do much but end up on the outside leading to El Audaz and Cancerbero to come in and do some mat wrestling. Virus and Fuego make their way in to increase the tempo of this match. Quickly the match breaks down and they’re all brawling. Audaz and Virus on the ramp, and now they’re triple teaming Stigma. They triple team El Audaz. Virus hit a spine buster on him, Cancerbero hit a splash, and then Disturbio hit him with a chop to the inner thigh for the win. First Fall: Disturbio pins El Audaz with a chop to the inner thigh.

Second fall starts with Fuego getting triple teamed. Disturbio was trying to unmask him. Now El Audaz is getting triple teamed, Fuego tries to stop it but the ref won’t let him. Weird time to enforce the rules. Stigma comes in to make the save. Fuego comes in too, and rolls up Disturbio for the fall. Second Fall: Fuego rolls up Disturbio for the second fall.

Fuego starts with Disturbio for the third fall, but he disposes of him bringing in Cancerbero who he disposes of to the outside, then Virus who he does the same to. Fuego poses then tags in Stigma. Stigma gets the better of Disturbio, leading to El Audaz squaring off with Virus. Audaz hits a nice arm drag from the apron, and then hits a dive. Fuego then hits a middle rope dive on Cancerbero and after that Stigma hits a top rope dive on Virus. El Audaz then hit a cross armbar on Virus for the win. Third Fall: El Audaz submits Virus with a cross armbar.

Winners: El Audaz, Fuego, Stigma

Kraneo, Volcano, and Stuka Jr. vs Mephisto, Luciferno, and Ephesto

Luciferno starts with Stuka. Like with the previous matches the first two to start exchange holds and do some mat wrestling. Stuka made the tag twice and the ref acts like he doesn’t see it. He was clearly looking at the second one, but it doesn’t matter because all participants brawl momentarily. Volcano finally gets in to relieve Stuka. Volcano hits a powerslam on Ephesto for the first fall. First Fall: Volcano hits a powerslam on Ephesto for the pin.

Second fall begins with Stuka and Luciferno again. Volcano comes in and starts running through the other team. He feigns a dive and then poses. He’s a rather large man so that would be a big dive. We’re back to Luciferno and Stuka and it quickly pours to the outside. Stuka does a tilt-a-whirl back breaker to all of them. Kraneo and Luciferno exchange chops in the ring, until Kraneo gets double teamed. Mephisto hits a sentom splash in the corner on Kraneo for the pin. Second Fall: Mephisto pins Kraneo with a senton in the corner.

The third fall in this CMLL match, like the first two, start with Stuka vs Luciferno. They start to triple team Volcano who I just have to point out how ridiculous he looks. He’s so fat that he has tape around his outfit keeping everything in place. This is the debut match for Volcano. Stuka hits a dive to the outside to take out Ephesto and Luciferno, and Volcano hits a spring board flop on Mephisto for the win. Third Fall: Volcano pins Mephisto with a spring board flop.

I have no better name for the move.

Winners: Kraneo, Volcano, and Stuka Jr

Mistico Rush vs Gran Guerrero, Ultimo Guerrero vs Cuatrero, Sanson vs Flyer, Volador Jr

I’m not sure what I just watched. All four were wrestling and then Mistico and Gran Guerrero went over the top and it was soon over. I surmise a battle royal and the two that weren’t eliminated their team goes last, and face the victors of this first tag match.

Now Gran Guerrero and Ultimo Guerrero are out to face Volador and Flyer in a tag match. So they start the match like a normal tag match, and as it goes on they exchange spots. They trade near falls until Los Guerrero’s catch them in a double submission for the win.

Now it’s Rush and Mistico vs Sanson and Cuatrero. The winner of this match faces the winner of the previous. At first I thought it was a gauntlet match but it’s a little different. A battle royal to see which teams go first. Then the winning teams face each other. A Quadrangular of Couples is the direct translation. Sanson and Cuatrero have the upper hand on Rush and Mistico. Double teaming one while the other is down. Both teams are brawling in the crowd now. Rush lifts a whole row of seats and hits Sanson with it. Rush and Mistico are now having the advantage by double teaming Sanson. Mistico hits a hurricanrana off the top on Sanson for the victory.

Out come Gran Guerrero and Ultimo Guerrero quickly to get the advantage on Rush and Mistico. Ultimo Guerrero and Rush brawl in the crowd to start and once Rush is taken out they double team Mistico. Rush comes back in and the tide starts to change. Rush goes for Ultimo Guerrero and Mistico starts untying Gran Guerrero’s mask. Mistico hits a big dive to the outside leaving Rush and Ultimo Guerrero in the ring. Rush throws the ref down and kicks Ultimo Guerrero in the nuts. Ref Dqs Rush. Final Fall: Los Guerrero’s win by DQ.

Rush chases the ref after the match, ref is running away.

Winners: Ultimo Guerrero and Gran Guerrero.


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 4.18.2024

Motor City Machine Guns either go out on their backs, or head to Rebellion as champs! Lets see how they finish their current run in TNA!

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No burying the lead here! The Main Event is The System versus Motor City Machine Guns, and it’s the Go Home episode before Rebellion! So we’re guaranteed a damn good tag match, and we should get either new wrinkles, or ways to keep the storylines cooking going into the Pay-per-View.

With all the rumors and innuendo about the Guns being on their way out, I think we all assume that MCMG is losing, but my inner fanboy is still excited.

Ratings:

  • Little Guido w/New FBI vs Hammerstone: Hammerstone wins via Torture Rack – SQUASH
  • LSG vs Joe Hendry: Hendry wins via Standing Ovation – SQUASH
  • Mustafa Ali & GYV vs Cody Deaner, Jake Something & Rhyno: Ali wins via 450 Splash – ** 3/4
  • Rosemary w/Havok vs Jody Threat w/Dani Luna: Rosemary wins via Spear – ***
  • Motor City Machine Guns (Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley) vs The System (Eddie Edwards & Brian Myers) w/Alisha Edwards: System wins via Roster Cut + Knee Party – *** 1/4

 

Results:

So we kick off the match with Josh coming out to commentary again to watch Hammerstone’s match. They really need a new way to try and keep heat without reusing the same tired gimmick of “ring side seat” to a Squash match.

Little Guido w/New FBI vs Hammerstone

Guido tries to shoot the half, but Hammerstone shrugs him off, lifts him like a child and runs him into a corner, few short shots and then just tosses him across the ring. Hammer gets a little distracted talking smack to Josh and eats a foot, but then tosses Guido with the ole Sack of Shit move and keeps working over Guido.

Hammer shoves Clayton, and provokes him to push him back right in front of the referee. She ejects them, Guido tries to take advantage but when he goes for the pinfall Hammer kicks out immediately and presses Guido out of thing through the ropes. Continues to dog walk Guido, puts the head gear on the ECW Original and then Torture Racks him while staring directly at Josh, and of course picks up the submission victory.

LSG vs Joe Hendry

Hendry cuts a little promo, mentioning the Fat Uncle Phil joke…something about shopping at the TOP Dollar Store. Solid mic work.

LSG is a damn good local talent, he’s been seen in ROH and AEW in the past (perhaps others, but that’s what comes to mind immediately for me), but we all know this is an enhancement match. A few nice chain wrestling spots early, but Hendry uses his power to stop the smaller wrestler, Sack of Shit into Standing Ovation and the match is over quickly.

Mustafa Ali & GYV vs Cody Deaner, Jake Something & Rhyno

Well okay, having Deaner ask the crowd if they wanted a 3v2 or their third member…RHYNO…is pretty much a no brainer in Philly. But at least the gimmick isn’t quite as cringe as I expected.

Jake starts with Zack Gibson and throws him around. Jake goes for the tag and Deaner asks the crowd who Jake should tag, and the crowd picks Rhyno. Rhyno Whips Gibson into a corner, Drake actually softens the impact, allowing Gibson to fire back, tag out, but Rhyno levels both GYV members and then even knocks Ali off the apron. Rhyno tries to call to the crowd to tag in Deaner and that goes over like a fart in church. He tags him in anyway, and the crowd is kinda dead and doing whatever it wants after the obvious ECW chants when Rhyno tagged in.

GYV take a couple lumps but they of course start to work over Deaner and capture some momentum. Solid tandem work from GYV, they cut off Deaner from making a tag and goad Jake a little to cause the ref to block off the babyfaces so the heels can take a few shortcuts. Cody eventually makes the tag to Rhyno, hot tag, he tries to set up the Gore but the GYV manage to stop him in his tracks and hit an Enzuigiri to daze the Man Beast, he falls to his corner and Jake tags himself in. Jake literally runs them all over, tags in Cody and Launches him from the Top Rope into Zack Gibson. Ali makes the save and Jake tries to get his hands on Ali, but the GYV keep throwing themselves at him, literally. The triple team finally gets the best of Jake, they hit 3 Dives and then post Jake, so they gather around Cody like hyenas.

They forgot about Rhyno, he’s set up for a Gore, he Gores Drake, Gibson and Ali take out Rhyno, but then Cody starts to fight back. Ali stops Deaner’s offense with an Avalanche Sunset Bomb, then hits his 450 Splash. Jake barely misses being able to break up the pin.

Rosemary w/Havok vs Jody Threat w/Dani Luna

Jody tries to start quickly with Shoulder Tackles, Lariats and Scoop Slams, and it does seem somewhat effective. Rosemary is having trouble finding offense against the intensity, but she keeps kicking out. Shotgun Dropkick finally gives Rosemary an opening, she goes into full mount and rains down strikes. Rosemary shoves Jody into a corner and Bites her in the corner. Jody tries to fight out, they go across and Rosemary catches her with the legs and puts her in the Upside Down. Splash in the corner from Rosemary, Exploder Suplex and Jody is eating a lot of offense.

Rosemary looks like she’s caught after she gets tripped up into the ropes and Jody goes for her Rope Knee into the German, but Rosemary dodges. Rosemary hits her own suplex and pulls out a beautiful Last Chancery! I haven’t seen her do that in a long time. Jody manages to fight to the ropes, Rosemary is a little slow to capitalize and eats a Pump Kick. Rosemary goes flying into the ropes, Jody hits the Double Knees into the German this time for 2, and they trade a few haymakers after that. Jody folds Rosemary with a low Lariat, Zombie rise spot a few times, Jody goes for a pinfall and Rosemary kicks out.

Havok jumps up on the apron, Dani meets her and they decide to step down, but the distraction was enough. Jody turns around and eats a Spear. Rosemary wins!

Motor City Machine Guns (Chris Sabin & Alex Shelley) vs The System (Eddie Edwards & Brian Myers) w/Alisha Edwards

Eddie and Shelley start off, and its a very simple slow start. Mostly an early stalemate, the typical Japanese style the TNA seem to love to employ. Starters tag out, but then Shelley with the blind tag, Sabin Baseball Slides out, picks Eddie’s ankle and sends his face bouncing off the apron, while Shelley sneaks up being Myers and they hit a tandem move before we cut to commercial. Off of the commercial it looks like Eddie and Myers regained control. But a nice Jawbreaker from Shelley sends Eddie falling back into the MCMG corner. Dragon Screws to both legs from Sabin and Shelley, and we get the Dragon Screw dissection spot for the Guns.

Myers gets sick of things, tries to get involved, but Simultaneous Figure Fours from the MCMG makes The System look silly. Alisha does the classic “push the rope forward” gimmick to assist Eddie in breaking the hold. She keeps chirping at Shelley until she finally grabs his foot. Shelley doesn’t take kindly, tries to grab her by the hair but she gets away, Shelley eats a strike and falls back to the ropes so Lish can just throttle him with the rope, Sabin walks over and acts like he’s going to PK her and the look of disgust on her face is hilarious, like “how dare he threaten to kick her”. Would I be mad is Masha decides to team with Lish and they win the Knockouts Tag titles? No, because the Knockouts Tags are trash. But I still prefer Lish as valet/manager.

Shelley starts fighting back after another commercial break, Eddie tries to cut him off, but Sabin clocks Eddie and Shelley manages to make the tag and Sabin comes in. Lights up both System members, Kick off Tornado DDT, into a Running Gamengiri. Eddie tries to counter but Shelley assists, tandem strikes, Double Baseball Slide into the classic MCMG spot 5 Hole Dive! Keeping up with the classics Shelley stacks the System members on each other and hit the Missile Dropkick/Flatliner spot. As the Guns are rolling, Sabin accidentally catches Sabin with his foot and The System take control! They hit their pieces of the System Overload spot, but Sabin kicks out. Roster Cut attempt from Myers, but Shelley is back. High Speed Dirt, Machine Gun Sandwich, but Lish grabs Shelley’s foot when they’re setting up Skull and Bones. Shelley gets dropped on the turnbuckle and thrown out, Sabin eats the Roster Cut followed up with Boston Knee Party and System retains!

Its a little weird to have had the two commercial cuts and the fact there’s still Nic Nemeth to follow. So it feels a little flat, I hope this wasn’t their swan song match, because it was nice to see some classic spots, but it was entirely too abbreviated. 

Nemeth comes out, goes into the crowd and finds a kid with a kendo stick and borrows a beer from someone, so he does a bit of a Sandman tribute. Moose cuts off his promo basically immediately. He throws out the “can’t beat the system” line again, and Nic rolls with the punches well. Moose uses a few cute analogies about Nic having a failure laden past, but Nemeth bites back and its really damn good. He says he can see it in Moose’s eyes that he thinks he’s getting in the ring with Dolph Ziggler, but no, there is no more old Dolph Ziggler, just the new Nic Nemeth. And Moose’s cool seems to be slightly shaken after those words. Good promo.

Overall Score: 6.5/10

So this was okay, if it didn’t end as strongly as it did, I would’ve rated this much lower. Two squash matches in the beginning, reusing the Josh comes out to the announce table to watch trope is boring, hell even Clayton’s shove to Hammerstone was super lame looking. The Deaner match was luke warm at best, but things picked up around the Rosemary match.

Lets also not overlook the segments with ASH & Xia, Jonathan Gresham’s whole deal and EY having to return to the violence/sickness/world class maniac, whatever you want to call it, were all great building blocks. This definitely wasn’t what I would call a strong Go Home, but it didn’t hurt things for Rebellion. The whole injury of Cardona was addressed, which honestly sounded weird since Jordynne basically said she was expecting them to have a backup plan so she has a backup plan. I don’t really like how that video package came across.

But who knows, all I know is, this wasn’t an awful episode, it just wasn’t really strong either.  Here’s to hoping Rebellion Saturday is still strong.


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Mitchell’s ROH Results & Report! (4/18/24)

Time to Man Up!

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Will the Ivy League MVP earn a title shot?

The NEW ROH World Champion, Mark Briscoe, is here to step onto the Proving Ground with one of Maria Kanellis’ baby boys, Griff Garrison! Will Griff make Maria proud? Or will he reach for the sky?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Bryan Keith VS Aaron Solo; wins.
  • The Infantry VS The Iron Savages w/Jacked Jameson; win(s).
  • The Dark Order VS ???
  • Six Woman Tag: Diamante, Leila Grey & Taya Valkyrie VS Kiera Hogan, Leyla Hirsch & Trish Adora; win.
  • Lady Frost VS Marti Belle; wins.
  • Beast Mortos VS Nick Comoroto; wins.
  • Abadon VS Allysin Kay; wins.
  • ROH World Championship Proving Ground Match: Mark Briscoe VS Griff Garrison w/ Cole Karter & Maria Kanellis; wins and
  • Lee Johnson VS JD Drake; wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Mark Briscoe speaks.

“Now House of Black, I’ve been doing this dance with y’all a little while now, and I’m starting to understand how y’all operate. Starting to understand y’all’s M-O. You try to intimidate me. You try to strike fear into the hearts of men. Well I done told you, I fear no man, I fear no evil. And ancient wisdom says the violent take it by force. Now lemme tell you, Eddie Kingston, Adam Copeland, and Mark Briscoe, we some violent men! And at Dynasty, we bringing the violence, babeh! So heed my advice, House of Black! Be afraid, be very afraid!” The Sussex County Chicken is ready for a fight, will he, the Rated R Superstar and Mad King tear down The House of Black once and for all?

 

Bryan Keith VS Aaron Solo!

The Bounty Hunter is still looking for a prize, but he’ll gladly fight to earn his shot. Will Keith be heading for a golden opportunity on the other side of Dynasty? Or will Solo shoot first?

 


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