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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (2/28/20)

JOHN CENA RETURNS!

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NEW SmackDown Coverage

The SmackDown after Super Showdown is HUGE!

Not only is there a NEW WWE Universal Champion and NEW SmackDown Tag Team Champions, but JOHN CENA RETURNS! What will the Face that Runs the Place do this close to WrestleMania?

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Bayley VS Naomi; Naomi wins, by disqualification.
  • Naomi & Lacey Evans VS Sasha Banks & Bayley; Naomi & Lacey win.
  • Kofi Kingston w/ Big E VS Robert Roode w/ Dolph Ziggler; Roode wins.
  • Daniel Bryan VS ???; Bryan wins.
  • The Usos VS The Miz & John Morrison; The Usos win.

PLAY BY PLAY

The NEW WWE Universal Champion, GOLDBERG, is here!

For those who didn’t see Super Showdown, the icon defeated The Fiend! The blue strap is back and SmackDown begins the home stretch to WrestleMania with a new champion! Boston’s reaction is mixed as Goldberg says, “Ladies and gentlemen, do not be mistaken. It’s not about who was last. It’s all about WHO’S NEXT!” Mic drop as Goldberg waits for someone to appear. And the person to appear is ROMAN REIGNS! The Big Dog was also victorious at Super Showdown as he defeated Baron Corbin inside a Steel Cage, and now stares Goldberg down from the ramp. Roman has more fans on his side than against as he gets in the ring to stand with the new champion.

Roman gets himself a mic and circles Goldberg while fans are a mix of cheers and jeers. Some fans go as far as saying, “You Both Suck!” Roman simply says, “I’m next.” Both men are men who get straight to the point. But if Roman is next, is he next to fall to the returning legend? Or is he the next WWE Universal Champion?

 

SmackDown relives highlights of John Cena’s career.

June 27, 2002: Kurt Angle asked, “Who in the hell are you?” John Cena introduced himself, and showed he had Ruthless Aggression! The Undertaker even gave Cena a handshake. That is how it all began, but what is the next chapter for the mega star’s mega career?

 

Bayley VS Naomi!

The SmackDown Women’s Champion is still the “role model” after she used Naomi’s own T-shirt to trap her legs. But in this non-title rematch, can Naomi get payback and punch a ticket to another showdown?

The bell rings and Bayley uses the ropes as defense. Fans boo as Bayley gets a mic. “This is ridiculous! I should not even have to be here right now, especially in front of you little idiots.” Boston boos Bayley as she exits the ring. Bayley made history when she beat Naomi in Saudi Arabia, but she’s here because of one reason and one reason only. Let her introduce the future Grammy award winning, future platinum record seller, it is THE BOSS! Sasha Banks returns to SmackDown to reunite with her best friend forever. Sasha taunts Naoim and then Bayley sucker punches her! The Boss laughs as Bayley stomps Naomi to the ropes.

Bayley drags Naomi up and throws hands. Naomi reverses the whip, scorpion kicks and dropkicks Bayley down! Naomi hits a corner splash then goes corner to corner, only for Bayley to send her into buckles! But then Naomi sends Bayley into buckles, REAR VIEW! Cover, Sasha attacks!

Winner: Naomi, by disqualification

Sasha throws hands and Bayley joins in! They beat Naomi down, but here comes Lacey Evans! The Sassy Southern Belle storms out and fights the BFF’s but that’s still 2v1. Until Naomi comes back! Naomi throws Bayley into one corner while Lacey has Sasha in another! The Sassy and the Glow have the edge but referees rush out. They pull Bayley off Naomi and Lacey off Sasha, but then a decision is made! Holla holla, we have a tag team match! The refs calm things down and the bell rings. Lacey and Naomi dodge Bayley and Banks to double dropkick them out! Bayley and Banks bail out while Lacey and Naomi high five. DOUBLE PESCADO! The Sassy Southern Glow has control as SmackDown goes to break.

 

Naomi & Lacey Evans VS Sasha Banks & Bayley!

SmackDown returns and Sasha has Naomi by her hair. Fans rally but Sasha and Bayley talk trash. Sasha pushes Naomi around then tags in Bayley. The BFFs double whip and double hip toss for a double SLAM! Cover, TWO! Lacey coaches Naomi up while fans rally more. Bayley taunts Naomi and stomps her to the ropes. Bayley throws forearms and then chokes Naomi on the ropes! The ref counts, Bayley lets up, but Sasha gets a cheap shot in! Bayley drags Naomi to a cover, TWO! Bayley keeps on Naomi with an armlock and keeps her from Lacey. She bumps Naomi on the buckle and tags Sasha. They crisscross and send Naomi into buckles! Sasha runs in to Meteroa! Cover, TWO!

Sasha is annoyed with Naomi and drags her up to grind her forearms in. Naomi endures as Sasha bends the arms back. Naomi fights up and elbows free to then give Sasha an atomic drop and windmill kick! Sasha and Naomi are down, but Sasha dropkicks Naomi back down! Cover, ONE, and Sasha is furious. Naomi gets to a corner but Sasha stomps a mudhole into her. Sasha grinds her boots in but lets up at the ref’s count. Sasha brings Naomi around to tag Bayley, and the two double whip again. They double elbow Naomi down then Bayley covers, TWO! Bayley drags Naomi up and tags Sasha again.

Sasha throws body shots then brings Naomi out to taunt Lacey. Sasha then BOOTS Lacey down and whips Naomi. Naomi hits Bayley, then gives Sasha the mule kick! Running jawbreaker! Naomi crawls for her corner, Sasha grabs a foot, Naomi enziguris! Hot tag to Lacey! Lacey rallies on Bayley with lariats! And kicks! Bayley gets to a corner and puts Lacey on the apron, but Lacey sweeps the legs! Lacey BOOTS Sasha then slingshots to drop the elbow! Bayley staggers up to get Lacey’s KNEE! Lacey fires up then salutes, and gives Bayley the swinging bronco buster! Naomi tags in to springboard crossbody! Cover but Sasha breaks it!

Lacey goes right at Sasha, but Sasha throws her out first. Naomi grabs Sasha with a full nelson, but Sasha standing switches to hit the backstabber! Fans boo Sasha but Lacey drags her out. Lacey throws Sasha into barriers! And then more barriers! Sasha hits back and sends Lacey into barriers! Bayley grabs Lacey, Naomi KICKS Bayley! Naomi slingshots and sunset flips, Naomi & Lacey win!!

Winners: Naomi & Lacey Evans, by pinfall

The Glow just pinned the champion! Will this earn her a golden rematch? And with Sasha back, will Lacey finally get that payback she’s been after?

 

The New Day is backstage.

Though they’re no longer SmackDown Tag Team Champions, Kofi Kingston and Big E are brushing off the loss to get back on the horse. But then they encounter Dolph Ziggler & Robert Roode. Kofi and the GLORIOUS One will have a showdown when SmackDown returns!

 

SmackDown relives another John Cena highlight.

April 3, 2005: WrestleMania 21! Cena took on John Bradshaw Layfield for the WWE Championship, and WON! Cena’s first of 16 WWE world title reigns was on the Grandest Stage of Them All! Will he be returning to that stage again?

 

Kofi Kingston w/ Big E VS Robert Roode w/ Dolph Ziggler!

The Miz & John Morrison won at Super Showdown to become the new SmackDown Tag Team Champions, and now it is about the chase for the New Day. Will ya bois make it back to those belts in time for WrestleMania? Or will the GLORIOUS One stop them right here?

The bell rings and Kofi circles with Roode. They tie up, Roode headlocks, and fans rally behind Kofi as he endures. Kofi powers out but Roode runs him over. Cover, ONE, but Roode has the headlock again. Roode shifts to get a hammerlock but Kofi gets a headlock. Roode powers otu but Kofi runs him over! Cover, ONE, but Kofi is after the arm. Roode pulls hair to put Kofi in a corner. The ref reprimands Roode as he stomps Kofi low. Roode throws haymakers and Ziggler taunts Kofi as Roode CHOPS! Roode whips Kofi corner to corner then runs in to monkey flip! But Kofi lands on his feet! And dropkicks Roode down! Cover, TWO!

Kofi drags Roode up and wrenches the arm. Roode gets the ropebreak but then elbows Kofi away! Roode elbows Kofi down, then seethes as he clamps on another headlock. Ziggler coaches Roode while Big E coaches Kofi. Fans rally and Kofi throws body shots. Roode holds on but Kofi powers out. Things speed up and Kofi hurdles to then back elbow! Roode bails out and Big E is fired up. Ziggler stomps up the steel steps to distract the ref and Roode kicks the steps? Roode pulls an Eddie! Big E is framed, and the ref EJECTS him!! Fans boo and Big E protests but Roode plays it up. Kofi is alone now as SmackDown goes to break!

SmackDown returns and Roode grinds Kofi in a chinlock. Kofi endures as fans rally up. Kofi fights his way up and throws elbows. He gets free, and Mandy Rose is watching backstage. Roode clubs Kofi down and Ziggler applauds. Roode drags Kofi up to whip to a corner. Kofi goes up and leaps to dropkick Roode down! Ziggler shouts at Kofi as Kofi fetches Roode on the apron. Roode hotshots Kofi back! Cover, TWO! Ziggler is frustrated for Roode as Roode looms over Kofi. Roode stomps Kofi then drags him up. Roode goes to suplex but Kofi throws body shots. The two throw hands and Roode clubs Kofi on the back. Roode brings Kofi up for a BIG suplex! Fans boo as Roode hops up on the corner.

Roode mocks the New Day claps as he takes aim. Roode laps, but his knee drop misses! Kofi rests under the bottom rope while Ziggler shouts at Roode. Roode gets up, but Kofi springboard ax handles! And rallies with double chops! Kofi dropkicks Roode then hist a leaping ax handle! Fans fire up as Kofi brings out the NEW~ DAY~ Boom Drop! Kofi is in the corner and fans fire up even more. “NEW! DAY ROCKS!” as Kofi spins, but Roode ducks Trouble to kick low and whip. Kofi goes up and crossbodies! Cover, TWO! Kofi keeps his cool while Ziggler is relieved Roode’s still in this. Kofi brings Roode up but Roode blocks the hook to full nelson SLAM! Cover, TWO!

Ziggler is stressed and takes off his jacket as he coaches Roode. Roode stalks Kofi to a corner and puts him up top. Roode climbs up to join Kofi but Kofi throws hands. Kofi headbutts Roode down! Fans fire up as Kofi adjusts and leaps, but Roode gets under. Roode gives Kofi a SPINE BUSTER! Cover, TWO!! Kofi still lives and Roode is furious. Roode stalks Kofi and dares him to rise. Roode then winds it up, “GLORIOUS!” but no DDT! Kofi spins, to an SOS!! Cover, but Ziggler helps Roode gets the ropebreak! The ref falls for it again! Kofi calls Ziggler out but Roode rolls Kofi up!! ROODE WINS!

Winner: Robert Roode, by pinfall

Give an assist to the Show-Off for this one! Mandy and Sonya Deville are both watching. “Her man” is happy that Roode won. Is Ziggler x Mandy an item? Is Roode-Dolph headed to the SmackDown Tag Team Championship scene?

Otis is watching SmackDown, too!

The disheveled Dozer tells Tucky that he has no idea what to do. Something isn’t right. He feels it, but he can’t put his finger on it. Tucker tells Otis that he loves him and all, but the truth is, sometimes the guy doesn’t get the girl. Sometimes a guy like Ziggler does. Just let Mandy go. But Heavy Machinery will find Otis that love in the WWE Universe. Tucky’s right. Can Heavy Machinery salvage Dozer from being down in the dumps as they return to in-ring action next week?

 

SmackDown has another John Cena highlight.

April 7, 2013: WrestleMania 29 in New York! Cena VS The Rock for the WWE World Heavyweight Championship, a once in a lifetime match-up! The Rock went in the champion, but it was Cena who left the champion! Another incredible win for Cena, but does he have one more in his future?

 

Renee Young presides over the WWE Intercontinental Championship contract signing.

The Elimination Chamber PPV is coming, and this title will be on the line! So please welcome first, the challenger and former champion, Shinsuke Nakamura! The King of Strong Style has the Swiss Cyborg and “great liberator” Sami Zayn with him as he goes to the ring. He had nine staples put in the back of his head after that awful landing on the grand piano during last week’s Symphony of Destruction. But now, the champion, BRAUN! The Monster Among Men sports a new mullet as he makes his way to the ring. Renee knows they’ve reviewed the contract and has Nakamura sign first.

But Sami wants everyone to just hang on a moment. They’re conducting business like gentlemen, so Strowman should grab a seat. Strowman grabs his seat, to THROW it! Oh real good. Then before Nakamura signs, Sami wants to double check the language of this contract. The mistreatment of Team Sami “is nothing short than a travesty of justice!” Nakamura’s birthday was ruined from those nine staples after being powerslam’d through the piano!! Nakamura is an artist, a poet- Strowman tells Sami to shut up! Everyone is sick and tired of Sami bitching and moaning. It doesn’t matter what’s in the contract, because Strowman knows Cesaro and Sami will get involved, and he’s fine with that. Strowman signs first.

Well we all heard Strowman just now. He’s willing to fight all three, right? There’s no spin here, Strowman doesn’t care what’s in the contract, he’ll fight them all, and then signed. Sami says that can happen, because with a little amendment and initial, all Cesaro and Sami have to do is sign their parts! And so now, the WWE can notarize the contract, and the title will be a 3 VS 1 HANDICAP MATCH!! So Strowman should listen carefully: “You are going DOWN at Elimination Chamber!” Strowman moves the table aside and Team Sami gets worried. The fight’s at the PPV, not tonight! “What makes you think you’re gonna make it to Elimination Chamber?”

Strowman swats Cesaro and Nakamura down! But before he can get to Sami, Nakamura and Cesaro go after him together! Strowman grabs them both by the throat, then Sami hits a HELLUVA KICK! And another! And then Nakamura adds a KINSHASA! “Is that how you want it? That’s how you get it!” Cesaro moves the table over, he and Nakamura bring Strowman over, double suplex WITH a Helluva Kick, through the table! Fans boo but the Monster is down. But then back up! He staggers about as Team Sami leaves, but will he be getting up when it’s the title on the line?

 

Daniel Bryan VS ???

The Yes Movement rolls down the Road to WrestleMania, but will he rolling into Tampa?

SmackDown returns and Bryan’s opponent is Curtis Axel! Drew Gulak is on commentary, apparently having chosen Axel as the new superstar to poke the holes in Bryan’s style. The bell rings, Axel and Bryan tie up, and Bryan waistlocks. Axel backs Bryan down to a corner, and throws an elbow! The ref reprimands but Axel stomps a mudhole into Bryan. The ref backs Axel off but Axel comes back for more. Axel snapmares and neck snaps Bryan down! Cover, ONE, but Axel is right on Bryan with an armlock. Axel digs his fingers into Bryan’s face but Bryan works his way up to his feet.

Bryan throws knees and European Uppercuts, but Axel gives the knees back. Axel whips Bryan to a corner, blocks the boots and clotheslines Bryan over and over! The ref reprimands but Axel clotheslines and throws Bryan down! Axel mocks the Yes Movement as he stomps Bryan and Gulak says Axel needs to stay focused. Bryan turns things around to give Yes Kicks to Axel! Fans chant “YES! YES!” with each one, then Bryan whips. Axel kicks back then throws Bryan out hard! Gulak taunts Bryan to get up while Axel goes out to fetch Bryan. Axel throws Bryan into the post! That’s not part of Gulak’s game plan but Axel follows Bryan in to stomp him down.

Axel has Bryan against ropes and grinds his forearms in. The ref counts and reprimands but Axel keeps on Bryan with a whip. Bryan goes up and over and runs, then ducks and comes back with a leaping lariat! Fans fire up with Bryan and he gives Axel more Yes Kicks! “YES! YES!” And then the buzzsaw, but Axel ducks it to roll him up! TWO, into the LeBelle Lock, but Axel jackknifes! TWO! Bryan runs into a cradle, TWO! Bryan gets Axel in underhooks but Axel powers out. Axel swings, and clotheslines from behind! Gulak is pumped that his PowerPoint worked! Axel brings Bryan up, but his timing is off, and Bryan counters  to the LeBelle Lock!! Axel taps, Bryan wins!

Winner: Daniel Bryan, by submission

Gulak is annoyed that Axel lost, but he says Axel almost had Bryan. Will Gulak find the perfect student to teach Bryan a lesson?

 

SmackDown has another John Cena highlight.

January 29, 2017: Royal Rumble, Cena VS AJ Styles for the WWE World Championship. The Phenomenal One couldn’t keep Cena down forever, Cena hits the AA and wins! The historic 16th reign that ties Cena with Ric Flair! But is there still time for Cena to become a historic 17 time?

 

The NEW SmackDown Tag Team Champions have a photo shoot.

The Miz and John Morrison celebrate their victory with “Hey hey! Ho ho! Miz ‘n’ Morrison!” But will they be celebrating for much longer as they’re in action here tonight?

 

Miz & Morrison head to the ring!

The Awesome A-Lister and the Guru of Greatness strut down the ramp and grab mics as they hit the ring. “What? No ‘You Deserve It’ chants?” Some fans do chant it and Miz agrees. Godfather, The Terminator, the Marine: great originals but even greater sequels. Miz is in Marines 3, 4, 5 and 6 so it’s what matters. If you thought they were good back in the day, check them out now! The haters were wrong and will choke on the pancakes! Miz and Morrison did what they said, and the Friday Night Delight and Most Must-See Superstar are again tag team champions!

Hate on them, chant “You Suck” all you want (which fans do), the only thing these two hear is the sweet sound of victory. And that sounds like “Miz ‘n’ Morrison! Hey hey! Ho ho!” Some fans actually join in. And now the party begins! But wait, a referee informs Greg Hamilton of an announcement? “Ladies and gentlemen,” Miz & Morrison will have their first tag team title defense will be against the New Day, Heavy Machinery, Lucha House Party, Roode-Dolph, AND the Usos! That’s because it will be an ELIMINATION CHAMBER MATCH at Elimination Chamber the PPV! The Miz and Morrison are furious, but here come the Usos! Will Jimmy & Jey grab up major momentum towards that massive tag team match?

The Usos VS The Miz & Morrison!

SmackDown returns as Jey and Morrison circle with the bell. Morrison waistlocks then headlocks but Jey powers out. Morrison runs Jey over and Miz keeps the cheesy chant going. Things speed up, Morrison lands out of the hip toss, but Jey sweeps the legs! Morrison ROCKS Jey then tags MIz, but Jey hip tosses Miz! Jey rams into Miz and Jimmy tags in. Jimmy hits a big corner forearm then covers, TWO! Glitching hits the screen as Jimmy elbows Miz. But Miz distracts the ref, Morrison gets a cheap shot, and Miz hits the basement DDT! Cover, TWO!

Miz taunts Jey with the Uso chant, then drags Jimmy up to punch back down. Tag to Morrison and they combine for the classic catapult into forearm and slingshot elbow drop! Cover out of the 21st Century Classic, TWO! Jimmy goes to ropes but Morrison kicks him in the ribs. Morrison grinds a knee into Jimmy but lets up at the ref’s count. Miz gets a cheap shot in! Fans boo ans Morrison brings Jimmy over and tags Miz. Miz and Morrison double gut buster on Jimmy! Miz taunts Jey then hits his basement BOOT! Fans are divided as Miz and Morrison get their chant started again. Miz rams his knee into Jimmy for the chinlock. Jimmy endures as Miz grinds him down. Fans rally up, Jimmy fights out and throws Miz off!

Morrison tags before Jimmy throws Miz out! Jimmy sees Morrison coming and rolls him up, TWO! Morrison blocks a kick but gets the dragon whip enziguri! Both men are down but fans rally up. Miz trips up Jey before the tag! Morrison hits FLYING CHUCK! Cover, TWO!! The Usos are still in this but in trouble as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again as hot tags bring Miz and Jey in! Jey rallies on Miz with big clotheslines and a mule kick. Jey uppercuts Miz then hits a Samoan Drop! Cover, TWO! Miz gets to a corner but fans join in on the “UCE! OH!” chant. Jey runs but Miz dodges the hip attack, only to run into another fireman’s carry. Miz full nelsons but Jey arm-drags out. Miz boots, tags Morrison, then grabs Jey for a double stomp neckbreaker! Cover but Jimmy breaks it! Miz throws jimmy out to the apron but then Jey throws Miz out. Jey uppercuts Morrison but Morrison ROCKS him back! Jimmy tags in and Jey dodges Morrison, Uso double enziguri! Morrison is down, Jey tags in and Jimmy DIVES onto Miz! Jey goes up, USO SPLASH gets knees! Cover, TWO!!

Morrison is frustrated that Jey survives the last second counter. Jey gets to the corner, Morrison runs in, but Jey puts him on the apron. Morrison ROCKS Jey but Jey uppercuts back! Jey climbs up and Jimmy tags in. Morrison trips Jey and ROCKS Jimmy! Starship Pain gets an ENZIGURI! Morrison ends up in a Tree of Woe and Jimmy climbs. Jimmy brings Morrison up, Jey SUPERKICKS Miz down, then tags in. Jey goes to one corner as Jimmy hits a SUPER DESTROYER! USO SPLASH! Cover, The Usos win!!

Winners: The Usos, by pinfall

They just pinned the SmackDown Tag Team Champions! Will the sequel actually be shorter than the original? Or can Miz and Morrison find a way to survive five challengers in the Chamber?

 

JOHN CENA RETURNS!

Boston explodes for their hometown hero and he’s just as pumped as they are! Cena gets the mic as fans cheer. “I came here tonight to talk to you, but you’re all talking to me!” SmackDown, Friday night on Fox, Boston make some noise! No, Bean Town, let him hear you! “This is crazy!” Fans are thunderous for Cena and he thanks them for that. “What am I doing here?” For one, it’s WrestleMania season. It’s time to answer the question: What is Cena doing for WrestleMania? An event that no WWE superstar wants to miss. Cena’s role has changed but he’ll say this loud and proud: he is and will always be a WWE superstar.

But then, what is Cena going to do for WrestleMania? “I’m doing something different.” Cena knows exactly how hard the superstars work for just even one WrestleMania moment. He prides himself on listening to the biggest superstar of them all: the WWE Universe. Fans cheer as he turns the mic to them. “And we do have an excited Universe here tonight!” Sometimes, we may feel like “they” don’t listen, but Cena listens. He hears us after Raw, after NXT, after SmackDown, and the fans are all passionate about the future of the WWE! Cena feels that because he’s passionate about that, too. Fans cheer in appreciation of that.

So Cena says he could come out here and say he’ll do whatever for Mania, and the WWE would probably make it happen. So then what IS Cena doing for Mania? Cena says he is doing “the right thing.” Because this year, Mania should be without Cena. Fans disagree with that! But Cena makes sure they know this isn’t good-bye. It is good-bye for now. He, like the fans, believes in the future of the WWE and the hard work of the new generation. Mania spots should be earned, not demanded and handed out. That means this year must be a Mania without Cena.

Fans are surely sour, but that means this is special. Cena isn’t sure when he’ll be back, so he wanted to make sure his announcement was “in a place that I call home.” He’s from West Newbury so it’s great to be here in Boston! This is a rowdy group here tonight! Fans chant for Cena again, and he says that means more than they’ll ever know. Cena sets the mic down, shakes hands with fans, and takes his leave. Cena takes one last long look and gives a salute to the fans. But then the lights start going out!! Cena surely knows what this means if he’s been watching the show! And when the lights come on… THE FIEND IS THERE!

Cena turns around to see Bray Wyatt, but he does not run. The Fiend points to the Mania sign! Fans realize what he means, and want to see it!! Cena tips his hat to the Fiend and says “You Can’t See Me!” The lights go out, Bray’s laugh echoes out into the night, and we have a WrestleMania dream (re)match set! But will it be one last nightmare for the iconic 16-time world champion?

 


 

My Thoughts:

A pretty good episode for it having to follow a disappointing and even frustrating Super Showdown. I appreciate them not beating around the bush on two big WrestleMania matches. Goldberg dares someone to step up, Roman steps up immediately, and we’re getting that for the WWE Universal Championship right away. John Cena returns, plays up wanting to put over the future and let them have their Mania moments, but then The Fiend comes out to make a challenge. Cena of course accepts immediately, and surely that match will be made official. It’s a bit of a shame the title isn’t on the Fiend VS Cena match to tease the easiest thing to tease: Will Cena get his 17th? Did the WWE NOT want to do that because it’d seem too obvious that he won’t?

While we’re not getting a WWE Intercontinental Championship Chamber match, getting a 3v1 Handicap isn’t bad. Well, it is, if you’re Nakamura, Cesaro and Sami. They got to put Strowman through a table tonight after more or less suckering him into the match, but I feel like Strowman ends up beating all three. Great for Strowman, bad for three equally talented wrestlers, so that the Chamber match would’ve actually been better. At least we’re getting a SmackDown Tag Team Championship Chamber match. Miz & Morrison VS Usos was a really great tag match, and that tag chamber match should be amazing given all the teams in it. I suspect there to be plenty of Otis and Ziggler story explored through this match, too, with their teams in the match.

Sasha Banks making her return was a good surprise for Boston, since she’s their other hometown hero. The legacy of Teddy Long continues on and we get a pretty good tag match of Naomi & Lacey VS Bayley & Banks. Lacey kinda let it slip there is going to be a SmackDown Women’s Chamber match, but now I’m not so sure. Sasha, Naomi, and Lacey are obvious contenders, and you can give Carmella one more chance, but who else is there in the SmackDown Women’s Division? Will the IIconics make their return just to fill space? WWE doesn’t need to slip back into their copypasta days when Raw and SmackDown had practically the same stories in the Women’s Divisions going. I’d actually be okay if this was a Chamber match we skipped this year.

My Score: 8.3/10


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Mitchell’s ROH Death Before Dishonor Results & Report! (7/26/24)

YEEHAW!

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The word of the day is, “Gold!”

ROH brings Death Before Dishonor to Texas, and makes it bigger than ever! SIX championship matches, how drastically will the landscape change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – MXM Collection VS Spanish Announce Project; wins.
  • Komander VS The Beast Mortos; wins.
  • Texas Deathmatch: Leyla Hirsch VS Diamante; wins.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championship Qualifier: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS The Dark Order; wins and advances to Battle of the Belts 11.
  • ROH World Tag Team Championships: The Kingdom VS Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O’Reilly; win(s) and
  • ROH World Television Championship Survival of the Fittest: Atlantis Jr. VS Lio Rush VS Shane Taylor VS Johnny TV VS Lee Johnson VS Brian Cage; wins and
  • ROH Pure Championship: Wheeler Yuta VS Lee Moriarty; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship: Billie Starkz VS Red Velvet; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Championship: Athena VS Queen Aminata; wins and
  • ROH World Championship: Mark Briscoe VS Roderick Strong; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 7.25.2024

Slammiversary Fallout! Where do things go on the way to Victory Road?

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Well now we start the fall out of Slammiversary. Josh Alexander in his bad bitch summer, X-Speedball legacy, ABC got the t-a-g and Jordynne is still in charge of the Knockouts division. Like I said at the end of Slammiversary, all of the champions being Babyfaces is stupid. They need to drop a couple titles fairly quickly, because I don’t care what some people say, Nic Nemeth ain’t gonna bring any eyes to the brand. He’s about as hot as day old Hamburger Helper over a camping sterno.

We’ll probably open with the luke warm champion, so tune in like 10 minutes late for anything of substance to be happen.

https://x.com/i/status/1816629254349533588

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner: Maclin wins via KIA – *
  • AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan: AJ wins via Down Payment – **
  • Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young): Hammer Your ASH wins via Torture Rack – ** 1/2
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey): Broken Alphabet wins via Twist & Splash – ***

 

Results:

Nemeth gives the ole “I’ll be a fighting champion…blah blah” promo and drops the “any company” line that we’ve already understood what that means. Campaign Singh cuts him off…and I never thought I’d be happy for Campaign Singh to walk out and say anything…ever. And…Mustafa’s promo is worse than Dolph’s. He’s gone from parody to caricature even saying “it was the biggest screw job Montreal ever saw”. Like some of these lines are cheap heat, but most are just brain dead comments that wouldn’t get a reaction out of anyone (and the crowd was silent for that comment). Mustafa gets caught in an Archer “phrasing” moment about getting screwed hard, but this is painful. Promos written by 14 year olds everyone…

This ends with Ali challenging Nemeth for the World Title. While I’m not against walk up challenges, I watch Japanese wrestling, I don’t really get the point aside from doing it just to do it. 

ABC and Matt Hardy have a small promo, and I’m still not really a fan of Unbroken Matt Version 6.0. The floating between Broken voice and his normal voice sounds amateurish.

OH LOOK, finally a match 20 minutes into the show. And it’s my son Steve Maclin! OH CHRIST he’s facing Deaner. This has been 25 minutes of talking followed by the worst god damn attempt at a gimmick. Deaner’s little “Papa Santino told me I can wipe my ass only if the crowd agrees”. This gimmick should die in a fire.

Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner

Deaner started off quick because Maclin was in disbelief that Deaner was actually gonna fight him. Maclin dodges a Crossbody, Busaiku Knee, and just starts beating on Deaner for fun. And this is fun, maybe Maclin can make sure Deaner gets stretchered out and written off forever. How do you call for an ambulance in French? Maclin with the old Back Breaker into a stretch. Deaner tries to nerd rage up, breaks the Back Breaker Stretch, his punch combo, into a Manhattan Drop and Bulldog. Deaner hits the Crossbody, but Maclin kicks out. This is entirely too competitive.

Deaner goes for the Deaner DDT, blocked, Olympic Slam into Splashing Deaner into the corner, Caught in the Crosshairs, K-I-A, thanks for coming you damn dweeb. Stay in Canada and don’t travel Deaner, please.

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AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan

As the bell sounds, Sami knocks Rich off the apron, Low Bridges AJ, does the Beats of the Bodhran on AJ and then AJ eats the offense and strategizes with his crew. Bishop and Rich swarm the ring, Sami allows himself to get distracted so AJ slides in and starts beating on Sami. AJ throats Sami across the middle rope and Rich makes his presence felt, AJ distracts the referee and Rich gets in a lot of cheap shots. Bishop throws Sami back in the ring, and AJ keeps up the pressure. Lots of 5 count chokes and leverage moves. After the commercial break ends, Sami dodges a Tennessee Whiskey Knee, gets in a few shots before Rich trips Sami as he’s setting up a Dive, and then AJ takes advantage of the position and hits the goofball knee strike.

AJ calls for his Chokeslam, Sami tries to break it with Axe Handles, then claws the eyes. Sami goes for a Scoop Slam, gets him part way up and then falls over. AJ Chokeslam again, but he bites his hand and starts fighting back. Launches himself at AJ, sends him bouncing off the ropes and uses the momentum to hit that Scoop Slam that was teased earlier. Sami goes for a Western Lariat but eats a Big Boot. AJ does a little Hulk Hogan pose to signal a Leg Drop, but Sami dodges and then connects on a Sliding Lariat. Thumbs Up, Thumbs….interference. Rich distracts the ref, Bishop lays out Sami, AJ connects with the Down Payment.

Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young)

ASH and Jordynne exchange slaps and then Jordynne starts to out muscle ASH. Spinebuster from Jordynne, Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights off, rope run, Sattelite DDT into both tagging out. EY does the Flair corner flop, slides back in between Hammer’s legs, and connects on a Neckbreaker. EY is the quicker of the two, but Hammer finally gets his hands on him and a Release Belly to Belly into a full mount raining of fists, then a near fall. Hammer smashes EY in a corner, Arm Wringer into an Irish Whip across, but EY moves and Hammer tags out to ASH. ASH levels Jordynne, peppers EY with a few shots and pulls him back to their corner and starts some tandem offense with Hammerman. Hammer Guerilla Presses ASH and throws her into EY for a near fall. Hammer looks to aim for either a Powerbomb or Nightmare Pendulum, but EY drops it into a Small Package, pinfall kick out, they both run, Double Lariat spot. The Knockouts get tagged in.

Jordynne is in control early, World’s Strongest Slam into a Vader Bomb. Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights it off and tags out to Hammer. Jordynne and EY do some schoolyard stuff with the old Push while Jordynne is down to trip Hammer. All four get in, ASH gets leveled, EY gets leveled, Hammer and Jordynne have a brief face off, but Hammer throws Jordynne to the apron and ASH connects with a Meteora from the apron. Death Valley Driver from Young on Hammer, ASH stares in shock, EY tells her to get, ASH runs away. EY goes up for his Macho Elbow, and ASH causes him to fall to Hammer’s feet, Torture Rack, and EY submits.

Josh Alexander comes out, with new heel music. And it’s not that bad, definitely better than some other people’s new music. Josh yells at the crowd a bit, says he can’t wait til he’s back in a real Canadian town, like his home of Toronto. Then he drops the mic in lieu of an explanation. The crowd chants him off with the “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey”. 

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The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey)

JDC and Hardy start, but JDC quickly tags out to Myers and that doesn’t go well. Hardy grabs a hold of Myers, a few Delete chops, drags him to his corner and they all get in a few shots punctuated with Hardy getting tagged back in and an Elbow into Myers’ extended and worked on left arm. Myers stays isolated, back into the corner, Boot to the gut, Ace tags in and wallops Myers. Ace connects on Double Kicks, into Russian Leg Sweep and his half of Click Click Boom, for a 2 count. Myers finally gets free with a Jaw Breaker and tags out to Eddie. But The System gets no momentum, Ace stifles Eddie’s offense and starts a few quick tags with him and Bey for tandem offense. Moose finally comes down the ramp as Eddie kicked out of yet another pinfall attempt because The System has had nothing going for them. Eddie finally gets some offense since Moose was a big enough distraction.

Eddie thinks they have a spot, so he tags back in JDC, but The ABC stop him cold, tag in Matt Hardy, and Matt walks down JDC, but JDC Low Bridges. Matt is on the outside, so all of The System surrounds Hardy, then Joe Hendry’s music hits! That stops the heel beatdown, and we follow Hendry’s entire entrance. So that proves Hendry is bigger than the 8 other people in this frame. Not really sure if that’s optics you want to push along. Ace and JDC try to remind people there’s wrestling going on, but JDC thumbs the eye to get a little something going. Vertical Suplex for a near fall, tag out for Eddie and Eddie lights up Ace with some of those NOAH Chops. Ace retreats to the ropes and Alisha chokes him with the ropes while the ref is distracted.

Myers gets tagged in, Ace tries to use the crowd energy, Myers stops it at first but then Ace slips a Scoop Slam and tags out to Bey. Hot tag, strike rush, Double Stomp, educated feet, Leap Frog to the corner but Lish climbs on the apron and yells at Bey which stops his rhythm. Myers kicks his feet out and causes Bey to crash. Eddie tags in for a few shots, then to JDC and Slingshot Knees, Wringer Snapmare, Bow and Arrow Submission, and JDC is just doing solid wrestling work right now. Uppercut between the Shoulder Blades as Bey tries to get out, tag to Myers and Bey is still eating offense. Eddie tags in, Bey tries the Sunset Flip, but Eddie tags out before going over, so Myers folds up Bey for a near fall and then tags out to JDC who connects on a Standing Suplex, slams Bey’s face into the corner, Eddie tags in, and Bey finally fights up to his feet, Eddie just flatten Bey’s comeback, tries a Tiger Driver but eats an Enzuigiri for a simultaneous tag. JDC and Hardy come in, JDC tries to exit halfway in, but Hardy is wrecking shop. He disposes of Eddie, Myers slides in but eats a tandem Neckbreaker/DDT from Hardy. Face team does the Delete Corner Face Smashes. Poetry in Motion into a Side Effect into Corkscrew Swanton for only 2 since Myers breaks it up! Everyone throwing hands, referee is distracted, Moose comes in to Spear Hardy, but Hardy dodges and throws him into JDC (I get the call back), Hendry then lays out Moose with the big Lariat. Twist of Fate from Hardy, Splash from Bey, Broken Alphabet wins!

 

Overall Score: 4/10

Ugh, cliche promos, too damn much talking, a competitive squash match with an imbecile as our first “match”, into an overbooked and slow heel match, finally a decent tag match (with the right team going over), into another overbooked match with a “tease” for the mystery backup being more obvious than Jericho’s WWF debut.

Aside from the afore mentioned tag match, The Rascalz promo and The System Promo; this was hard to watch. A lot of cornball promos, Rosemary licks her conspiracy board, storylines got zero traction. Whoopity Doo, Ryan Nemeth got a match next week and we get an undead wedding.

While this was a bad episode, it was bad by at least new standards. We’re not back in the TNA Dark Days again, but this was…a useless show.


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