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Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (9/6/21)

It’s time for Tag Team Turmoil!

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Coverage Raw 2021

The Raw Tag Team Champions WILL have challengers!

SEVEN teams will battle until only one is left! Which duo will be lucky enough to move on and challenge RKBRO for the Raw Tag Team Championships?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Raw Tag Team Championship #1 Contenders Tag Turmoil: momentarily suspended.
  • WWE United States Championship #1 Contenders Match: Drew McIntyre VS Sheamus; Sheamus wins and challenges Damian Priest for the title at Extreme Rules.
  • WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships Contenders Match: Natalya & Tamina VS Rhea Ripley & Nikki A.S.H.; Rhea & Nikki win and will challenge for the titles.
  • John Morrison VS Karrion Kross; Kross wins.
  • Raw Women’s Championship: Charlotte Flair VS Nia Jax w/ Shayna Baszler; Charlotte wins and retains the title.
  • WWE 24/7 Championship: Reggie VS Akira Tozawa; Reggie wins and retains the title.
  • Raw Tag Team Championship #1 Contenders Tag Turmoil, resumed: Bobby Lashley & MVP win and will challenge RKBRO for the titles next week.

PLAY BY PLAY

Tag teams talk about tonight’s turmoil!

New Day starts off with tonight saying it is tag turmoil BABY! Seven enter, one survives and that team earns a tag title match! But who will that be? Who who who? Who else than ya bois, the NEW~ DAY~! Becaaaause~! NEW! DAY ROCKS! But the Viking Raiders thrive on turmoil, so tonight, Erik & Ivar are ready to raid the entire division! Mansoor is pumped to become a tag team champion but Msutafa Ali wants him to just follow his lead, and do whatever it takes. Lucha House Party is fired up for their chance! LHP proves they’re outta this world, and it’s lucha time! Mace & T-Bar are not afraid to go through six more teams. They’ll just be six victims in one go.

Veer speaks in Punjabi, and then Jinder Mahal translates: “We are the next Raw Tag Team Champions.” NAMASTE!! But AJ Styles is best for last, and he says turmoil is exactly what RKBRO are in representing the Raw Tag Division. Can anyone imagine Matt Riddle, “O’ Smokey Brain himself,” being in charge of anything?! Maybe a soda machine, but he’d screw that up, too. After tonight, the former champions will be challengers and they’ll get those titles back! But the Phenomenal One and his towering friend need to survive the SEVEN team Tag Team Turmoil! Who will luck of the draw favor this night?

 

RKBRO is here!

Matt Riddle & Randy Orton make their way out, both belts and one scooter included. They go to the ring and strike their pose, still feeling very good over winning their mighty challengers last week. The mics are handed over as fans chant for “R K BRO! R K BRO!” Orton recalls how last week, the WWE Champion Bobby Lashley and MVP tried to take the titles off him and Riddle, “and they failed miserably!” Orton knows why they failed. It is quite simple: Lashley is nothing more than a greedy sonova bitch! That brings us to tonight. RKBRO will watch the other seven teams left and see which team deserves to be next in line to be beaten by the most destructive tag team in sports entertainment today: R! K! Bro…!

Riddle is excited cuz tonight is sick! T-Bar & Mace are super tall with awesome face paint. Lucha House Party aren’t that super tall, but they got great masks. Riddle wants Orton to get a snake mask and Riddle gets a rubber horse mask and become the Snake & Stallion Express! Or! Or! They get great jackets like Mansoor & Ali. Riddle knows Orton hates sleeves, so he can get Mama Riddle to cut the sleeves off. Or, or! They go on a raid like the Vikings and have ale! Does Orton like ale? Probably not, that body doesn’t look like it has much carbs. Doesn’t he look good? Fans agree, Orton looks good. But Riddle loves ale, ‘specially when he gets the munchies.

Speaking of, maybe New Day brings pancakes? Woods has his trombone but Riddle’s always been more of a recorder flute guy. What does Orton like playing? But here comes Bobby Lashley & MVP?! They’re dressed for business, not a match, so Riddle chills. MVP tells Riddle to shut his “dumb ass” up. Or maybe in Spanish, callete, estupido! The WWE Universe loses IQ points every second they have to listen Riddle ramble on about nothing. And instead of the tag turmoil, worry about this juggernaut coming after Orton for that cowardly RKO! Lashley and MVP storm to the ring, Lashley says it was cowardly. But now Orton is talking about tag titles. Like Lashley just forgot last week! Lashley is gonna finish what Orton started!

But instead of sneaking up from behind, man up and face Lashley 1v1! Then Lashley can put Orton in a Hurt Lock and rip his arms out his socket before he throws him down on the ground! Orton asks if Lashley is challenging him to a match. Absolutely, 1v1, Lashley VS Orton! Interesting… Orton was just thinking about that a couple weeks ago that it’s been about 10 years or more since they faced each other in the ring. And Lashley talking about double champ this, double champ that, Orton got thinking. Orton will accept this challenge on ONE condition: It is for the WWE World Championship! MVP wants this to stop here to talk with Lashley but Riddle gets the fans behind Orton.

MVP and Lashley discuss, and MVP tells Orton that like the Viper he is, he hit his patented RKO #outtanowhere! However, when Lashley returns the favor, it’ll be in Orton’s face and FOR the WWE title, at Extreme Rules! The challenge has been accepted but Lashley says he IS a greedy SOB! Hurt Business is going to talk with management and get in on that Tag Turmoil! Then when Lashley & MVP win, Lashley will become a double champion! But then the New Day makes their way out to the ring! #nDr ask Miami what’s happening, and Kofi Kingston wants to ask “Bob” about inserting himself into the match. Phrasing!

Well, go talk to management ASAP cuz ya bois are about to kick off the turmoil RIGHT NOW! And yes, they are starting the turmoil and the odds are against then. But the New Day beat the odds, like when Woods beat Lashley! MVP says that was not legit, he had help. Now, Woods & Kofi will beat the odds and become the NEW~ W! W! E! WORLD! TAG! TEAM! CHAMPIONS~! Riddle & Orton doubt that part but… Here come the Viking Raiders! Erik & Ivar are ready to start this off with the eleven-time tag team champions, after the break!

Raw Tag Team Championship #1 Contenders Tag Turmoil!

The New Day VS The Viking Raiders!

Raw returns and RKBRO is watching right next to commentary as the bell rings. Kofi and Ivar start and tie right up. Ivar waistlocks, Kofi pries at the hold and switches. Fans rally as Ivar bucks Kofi away but things speed up. Kofi hurdles and hurdles and back elbows! Kofi lines up a shot, elbows Ivar in the corner then throws knees over and over. Kofi goes corner to corner but runs into the SEATED SENTON! Tag to Erik, Ivar DECKS Woods and then clotheslines Kofi! Erik picks Ivar up, SPINEBUSTER HIP ATTACK! Cover, TWO! Erik looms over Kofi as fans rally up. Erik shoves then DECKS Kofi, then paces around him.

Erik brings Kofi back up, RAMS him into the corner, tag to Ivar. Ivar brings Kofi around to scoop but Kofi slips out. Kofi shoves, Ivar cartwheels but Kofi STOMPS him down! Tag to Woods and Erik! Woods dodges and runs into a tilt-o-whirl headscissors! Erik comes back, Woods shoves him to LEG LARIAT! Erik blocks the whip, reverses it and reels Woods into an EXPLODER! Woods gets to a corner, Erik runs in and blocks the boots and swings Woods to the apron. Woods counter punches Erik then GAMANGIRIS Erik, to then step in for the TORNADO DDT! Tag to Kofi and Woods KNEES Ivar down! Woods SUPERKICKS then Kofi SUPERKICKS, cover, TWO!!

Kofi drags Erik up while fans rally for the New Day. Tag to Woods, Riddle checks on Ivar as New Day double whips. Erik throws Kofi out then spins Woods for Ace Ten- NO! Woods blocks the knee, but Erik blocks the forearm to kick and knee and shove! Woods slides under, ROLLING ELBOW! Woods CLUBS away on Erik, runs to ropes, but Erik ROCKS him with a forearm! Kofi tags in as Erik runs, Woods clotheslines Erik out! Kofi runs over to the corner and SUPER TRUST FALLS, but is caught?! Woods runs in and the Viking Raiders TOSS Kofi into Woods! The New Day is down and the Raiders are fired up as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns as Woods arm-drags Erik away, and hot tags to Kofi! Kofi springboards in to ax handle Erik then he DECKS Ivar! Kofi rallies on Erik, dropkicks him ten runs to LEAPING AX HANDLE! Riddle is fired up as Kofi gives Erik the NEW~ DAY~ Boom Drop! Fans fire up as Kofi aims from the corner. Ivar distracts and Erik CLUBS Kofi! Tag to Ivar, the Raiders whip Kofi, pop up to the waistlock! Springboard, LARIAT GERMAN SUPLEX! Cover, TWO!! Kofi survives, showing us why the New Day have had so many title reigns! Tag to Erik, Ivar brings Kofi back up. Feed to a scoop and BACKBREAKER, then Erik gut wrenches Kofi for a GUT BUSTER!

Erik isn’t done, he gut wrenches and POWER- NO! Kofi RANAS Erik away! Erik runs at the corner but Kofi dodges! Hot tag to Woods but Ivar also tags in. Woods runs at Erik but into a CHOKE SLAM! Ivar is up top, VIKING SPLASH! Cover, TWO!! Woods now shows the toughness of 11-time champions! Even RKBRO are surprised by that one. Tag back to Erik and the Viking Raiders try again. Feed to the pop-up but Kofi gives Ivar TROUBLE IN PARADISE! Woods makes Thor’s Hammer into an inside cradle! The New Day ELIMINATE the Viking Raiders! But here comes the Modern Day Maharaja and Mr. Million Dollar Arm!

The New Day VS Jinder Mahal & Veer w/ Shanky!

But before Mahal’s team gets in the ring, Kofi dropkicks Veer and Woods WRECKS Mahal! Then Kofi DIVES to take out Veer! Woods puts Mahal in and Kofi dares Shanky to do something. Woods CROSSBODIES Mahal, TWO! The advantage Mahal’s team had is gone, Woods CHOPS him but Mahal knees low. Mahal whips and CLOBBERS Woods, then looms over him. Mahal stomps Woods, runs the ropes and drops a knee! Cover, TWO! Mahal scowls as he gets Woods up. Woods throws hands, CHOPS away, but Mahal knees low again. Veer tags in as Woods powers out of the headlock, Mahal wrenches and FLAPJACKS, then Veer THESZ PRESSES! “NAMASTE!!”

Kofi goes around the way but now Shanky stands in his way. RKBRO wants Shanky and Kofi to keep it cool as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Veer throws Woods down from the corner. Veer stomps Woods, then powers up for a BIG ax handle drop! Veer drags Woods back up, tags Mahal, and they mug Woods in the corner. Mahal brings Woods up to scoop and SLAM! Mahal fires up but fans boo as he drags Woods up again. Mahal scoops and Woods slips out to slide under! Mahal grabs a foot to keep Woods from Kofi but Woods boots him away! Tag to Kofi! Kofi GAMANGIRIS then springboards to AX HANDLE! Kofi DECKS Veers, runs at Mahal but Mahal dodges the splash. Mahal runs in but gets boots, Woods tags back in! BACKBREAKER to the DOUBLE STOMPS!! Cover, New Day ELIMINATES Team Mahal!

The New Day VS Lucha House Party!

New theme music for Lince Dorado and Gran Metalik, they’re ready to get #LuchaLit! New Day is ready and meet them at the ramp. New Day pops LHP up to the apron, Lince mule kicks Woods and Metalik does the same to Kofi. DOUBLE ASAI MOONSAULTS! Direct hits and LPH puts Woods in. Lince drags Woods up and throws EuroUppers and forearms. Lince whips Woods to ropes, Woods reverses but Lince WHEEL KICKS! Tag to Metalik and Lince sets Woods in the drop zone. Lince gives Metalik a boost for a FALLING SPLASH! Cover, TWO!! Woods survives and RKBRO applauds. Metalik drags Woods up to CLUB down then stomp him.

Metalik eggs Woods on as he kicks him at the ropes. Metalik wrenches an arm, tags Lince, and they mug Woods. Lince CHOPS Woods, Woods hits back and CHOPS in return! Woods CHOPS again, but Lince CHOPS Woods off his feet! PLANKING SPLASH! Cover, TWO! Woods goes to a corner, Lince runs in but is put on the apron. Lince GAMANGIRIS, goes up top, then leaps for a BIG crossbody, into a Code Breaker?! Woods and Lince are both down, Lince crawls to hot tag Metalik, and Metalik keeps Woods down! Metalik wags his finger at Kofi then brings Woods around. Metalik fireman’s carries, Woods slips off and shoves but Metalik SUPERKICKS back!

Metalik runs but no Slingblade! Woods mule kicks, tag to Kofi! Kofi goes up top again, FLYING CROSSBODY to the back! Cover, TWO! Metalik survives being flattened and he JAWBREAKERS Kofi! Tag to Lince, but Kofi BOOTS Lince down! Kofi shouts out Diesel then covers, TWO! Tag to Woods, New Day whips but Lince GOLDEN REWINDS! Victory roll for Woods, TWO!! SUPERKICK! Tag to Metalik, Lince LIONSAULTS then Lince LIONSAULTS! Tag back to Lince, he goes to the very top, MOONSAULT! Cover, Kofi breaks it! Kofi whips Metalik but he lands on the apron. Kofi runs and slides but Metalik jumps over, Lince WRECKS Kofi with a dropkick!

Metalik goes to the corner and tags back in. LHP DOUBLE SUPERKICK Woods down! Lince rolls Woods into Metalik’s wheelbarrow but Kofi trips Lince! Woods hits a WHEELBARROW FACEBUSTER! Cover, New Day ELIMINATES Lucha House Party! Ya bois are 3-0, but here come the towering titans! We see if New Day can survive extinction after the break!

The New Day VS Mace & T-Bar!

Raw returns and Mace CLUBS away on Woods’ chest and shoulders with big elbows! Mace talks trash to Kofi as he brings Woods around to CLUB him on the back. T-Bar talks trash on Woods, fans rally for New Day and Woods fights back! Woods ROCKS and CHOPS Mace but Mace CHOPS back! Mace whips Woods to a corner then runs in to KNEE Woods down! Cover, TWO! RKBRO watches closely as Mace drags Woods around to clamp a claw into his shoulder. “NEW! DAY ROCKS!” as Woods endures and fights up. Woods breaks free to ENZIGURI! Mace wobbles but comes back for Woods to put him in a corner. Mace fires off big hands but the ref counts.

Mace lets off to then hoist Woods up top. Mace choke grips but Woods clubs his arm! Mace ROCKS Woods with a left hand, then sits him back up! Woods throws more hands, leaps and missile dropkicks Woods’ leg out! Woods crawls but Mace keeps him anchored. Mace looks to T-Bar, tag, but Woods crawls away! T-Bar stomps Woods down, talks trash to Kofi, then brings Woods up. Woods throws body shots but T-Bar knees low. T-Bar whips Woods to ropes and CLOBBERS him with a back elbow! Cover, TWO! T-Bar clamps on with a chinlock and he grinds Woods down. Woods endures and the fans rally up again. Woods fights up, Riddle definitely supports him, but Mace tags in.

Woods JAWBREAKERS T-Bar but Mace back suplexes high and hard! Cover, TWO!! Mace is furious and he wrenches Woods’ neck! Woods fights up, fights back and mule kicks hard! Mace wobbles but stays up, so he BACK HANDS Kofi down! Mace scoops Woods but Woods moves around! T-Bar still tags in, and he goes around the way to get Kofi up! T-Bar THROWS Kofi into barriers to further deny Woods his tag! Mace gives Woods a HEEL KICK, then he goes out after Kofi. T-Bar torture racks Woods for FEAST- NO! SCHOOLBOY! New Day ELIMINATES another team!! And the titans are furious! T-Bar LARIATS Woods off his feet!

Mace throws Kofi around then back into the ring. Orton has Riddle let this happen, RUNNING BACK SUPLEX from Mace! But here come Mansoor & Ali! Ali wants Mansoor to let this happen, too! They may have beef with the behemoths, but this is about their chances of winning! Mansoor is still pure hearted, he runs in to make the save! Mansoor fires off CHOPS but T-Bar DECKS him! Ali sighs and tells Mansoor he was to listen to him. But then T-Bar and Mace both get Mansoor in choke grips. Ali runs in and Mansoor is tossed aside! Ali dodges T-Bar to dropkick Mace! But then Ali turns around into T-Bar’s CYCLONE KICK!

Mace BLASTS Mansoor into the announce desk! T-Bar TOSSES Ali! They then go out and drag Mansoor up to RAM him into steel steps! Mace hauls Ali up so that he and T-Bar can double whip him into a POST! Fans boo but the behemoths pull apart steel steps. Orton has Riddle stay back again, and the behemoths RAM the steps into Mansoor! Then they go into the ring, but the New Day fights back! T-Bar DECKS Kofi, Mace has the steps like a boombox. T-Bar scoops Kofi to LAWN DART him into the steps!! The refs rush out to stop this but the titans have not had their fill. But Sonya Deville & Adam Pearce tell them to stop! NO doing! HIGH JUSTICE into the POST!!

Woods writhes and all the other contenders are still down! Raw looks to sort out the chaos Mace & T-Bar just caused, while we go to break.

Raw returns and somehow all four men are okay to continue despite what we saw happen to them. Sonya & Pearce decided that to make sure this is done right, these two teams are going to be given time to rest, and we’ll continue the turmoil later tonight! But now that means Lashley & MVP DID get in on this in time! Will the All Mighty be able to take advantage of whoever comes out of those two brutalized teams?

 

WWE United States Championship #1 Contenders Match: Drew McIntyre VS Sheamus!

Though both warriors got their part in last week’s awesome Triple Threat, there still needs to be a challenger at Extreme Rules! Damian Priest awaits, will it be the Scottish Stud or The Fella that wins this fight to fight again?

The bell rings and Sheamus offers a handshake, but McIntyre says shove it! The two tie up, go around, and they end up on the ropes. The ref calls for the break but they keep going into a corner. They fight with hands but then let off as the ref counts. Sheamus protests but he ties up with McIntyre. Headlock takeover and Sheamus grinds McIntyre down, McIntyre makes it a cover, ONE, and Priest is watching from backstage. McIntyre fights up, powers out, but Sheamus runs him over! Sheamus soaks up the heat, runs, but McIntyre drops to get up and dodge for a BIG shoulder tackle! McIntyre growls as he gets Sheamus up and CHOPS him to a corner!

McIntyre stomps, CHOPS and whips Sheamus, but Sheamus holds ropes. Sheamus throws McIntyre out and KNEES Him in the ropes! Then CLUBS him on the back. Sheamus ROCKS McIntyre in the back, stands him up and says, “This is my favorite part, Graves!” BEATS OF THE BODHRAIN! But McIntyre stops it at 4 to elbow Sheamus back! McIntyre turns it around to give Sheamus the other ten Beats of the Bodhrain! Only for Sheamus to HOTSHOT him down! Sheamus hurries up top as McIntyre bails out, SUPER FLYING CLOTHESLINE! The Celtic Warrior downs McIntyre and fires himself up as fans boo!

Sheamus puts McIntyre in the ring, takes aim from the corner again, but runs into a SPINEBUSTER! Jackknife cover, TWO! McIntyre grits his teeth as he drags Sheamus back around to CHOP him! McIntyre then goes up top, but Sheamus ROCKS him with haymakers first! Sheamus climbs up, CLUBS McIntyre on the back, then hoists him up. McIntyre fights back, CLUBS Sheamus more, then looks to the outside?! The ref wants McIntyre to let off, Sheamus throws body shots in return, and then he stands on the very top to SUPERPLEX McIntyre in!! Both warriors are down and Miami is fired up as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns Sheamus keeps McIntyre down with an armlock and chinbar. Sheamus shouts that McIntyre is overrated, but McIntyre fights up. McIntyre gets to his feet, throws body shots and CHOPS Sheamus back! Sheamus CLUBS, McIntyre CHOPS, and the two scrap into a corner. McIntyre whips corner to corner but Sheamus elbows him away. They both run, McIntyre dodges to rally with BIG clotheslines! McIntyre whips again and hits an OVERHEAD suplex! Sheamus fights the clinch and escapes the second, but McIntyre gets the NECKBREAKER! McIntyre kips up, glares at Sheamus, and goes after him in the corner, only for Sheamus to kick legs out!

Sheamus skins the cat up the corner, McIntyre stands and climbs to SUPER OVERHEAD BELLY2BELLY!! Cover, TWO!! Sheamus survives and McIntyre is beside himself! McIntyre underhooks, Sheamus Alabama lifts out of it but McIntyre sunset flips! TWO, McIntyre hits a GLASGOW KISS! But the black mask was Sheamus’ shield! Sheamus then HEADBUTTS McIntyre! A Dublin Kiss perhaps?! Cover, TWO!! Sheamus keeps going and he Alabama lifts again, for an ALABAMA SLAM! Cover, TWO!! McIntyre refuses to give in and Sheamus is beside himself! Sheamus gets up and paces before he kicks Sheamus down. Fans boo but Sheamus soaks up the heat as he goes to a corner.

Sheamus mocks McIntyre’s countdown! But McIntyre LARIATS Sheamus! FUTURE SHOCK DDT!! Cover, TWO!! Sheamus survives again and McIntyre is seething. McIntyre stands as fans chant, “THIS IS AWESOME!” McIntyre aims from the corner, runs in but into a fireman’s carry! McIntyre fights free to then POST Sheamus! And a takedown to a KIMURA!!! Sheamus endures and reaches for ropes but the body scissors keep him down! Sheamus drags himself over, reaches out, ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, McIntyre lets go but he certainly learned that from The Beast. Sheamus is in a corner, he hoists McIntyre up and out but McIntyre HOTSHOTS the arm!

McIntyre climbs up the corner, leaps but Sheamus gets under! BICYCLE KNEE! Cover, TWO!! McIntyre survives again but now Sheamus goes for the legs. Sheamus ties up the legs, McIntyre gets a cradle, TWO! Kick and forearms, then a fireman’s carry, McIntyre STEALS WHITE NOISE! Cover, TWO!! McIntyre couldn’t end Sheamus with Sheamus’ favorite, but the forearm start flying! The mask hurts McIntyre’s arm! But then he grabs it and pulls it off! Just like Priest at SummerSlam! BOOT to Sheamus’ vulnerable face! The mask is set on the post, McIntyre takes aim again, CLAY- NO! Sheamus schoolboys with tights!! Sheamus wins!!!

Winner: Sheamus, by pinfall (NEW #1 Contender to the WWE US Championship)

McIntyre keeps his cool as he grabs Sheamus’ mask from the corner. Sheamus turns around and sees the mask in McIntyre’s hands. Sheamus wants McIntyre to take it easy, he still has a bad nose. McIntyre knows, and he CLOBBERS Sheamus in the head with the mask! Countdown and CLAYMORE!! Broken nose or not, Sheamus still has his ticket to the PPV. Will McIntyre ever get satisfaction?

 

Backstage interview with Damian Priest.

Kevin Patrick asks how Priest feels now that he’s facing Sheamus at Extreme Rules. “Did you see that?” That was awesome! But Priest’s been here long enough to see a ton of matches. Priest’s also seen even more fights, and been in most of them. That match was a fight. That’s why Priest likes these two! They can both go, and Priest expects nothing less from Sheamus. Priest won’t be the only one enjoying himself, either. Priest and the “Agents of Infamy” all around the world will be feeling great. Why? “Because I know something Sheamus doesn’t know. I’ve got his number.”

And that night at Extreme Rules ends with Sheamus on his back in the ring. But it’ll be the sounds that #LiveForever: “And still United States Champion…! Damian Priest!” The Archer of Infamy likes the sound of all that already, will it be music to his ears to add onto Sheamus’ bumps and bruises?

 

Backstage interview with Nikki A.S.H. & Rhea Ripley.

The Almost Super Hero and Aussie Nightmare are an unlikely duo of former Raw Women’s Champions that don’t have much of anything else in common. Rhea says that after debuting, she only had one goal: be a champion. After seeing Nikki fight through adversity, that is something they have in common. Nikki adds that of course everyone wants to be champion, but these two don’t need to fly to any conclusions. And okay, they don’t have much in common, but they’re still “getting there” as a team. Maybe. Rhea says if this does work and they win tonight, maybe they can have gold in common. Nikki agrees with that, and wants Rhea to set her up for the next line.

Rhea sighs and says, “Maybe it’s time to…” “UNLEASH! SUPER! BRUTALITY! Well that’s not an awful team name. But will #SuperBrutality be able to get a super victory over the Queen of Harts & Daughter of Superfly?

 

Backstage interview with Charlotte Flair!

How does the Queen plan on “bouncing back” from her loss to Nia Jax last week with the title being on the line tonight? Well last week, Nia said she’d splatter Charlotte all over the ring. Clearly, she didn’t follow through. And though Nia won, Charlotte’s still standing, looking better than ever. While having a title match tonight doesn’t sit well with her, Charlotte will do whatever it takes to keep the title. Yes, Nia is not like most girls, but Charlotte is one of a kind. As for that crown Nia said she’d shove up Charlotte’s behind? Charlotte will bash Nia over the head with it, and Nia will #BowDown and kiss the floor! The Irresistible Force cannot resist the Queen, but will she defeat and dethrone her?

 

WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships Contenders Match: Natalya & Tamina VS Rhea Ripley & Nikki A.S.H!

Speaking of the Women’s Tag Team Champions, Natalya is back from her leg injury! Will she and Tamina still hold down the fort as a team? Or is tonight when the champs get caught off guard?

Raw returns as the statement makers make their entrance. Teams sort out and Nikki starts with Tamina. Tamina doesn’t take the little superhero serious. Tamina eggs Nikki on, the two tie up and then Tamina shoves her away. Nikki comes back, they tie up and Tamina throws Nikki down! Nikki gets to a corner, Tamina corners her, but Nikki gets around and comes back! Tamina stops the monkey flip and puts Nikki on the top rope to fire off haymakers! Nikki blocks to CLUB away on Tamina! Tamina HEADBUTTS, then fireman’s carries, only for Nikki to fight and sunset flip! Tamina stays up, drops down but Nikki dodges! Nikki runs to SENTON! And basement dropkick!

Tag to Rhea, she gives Nikki a boost to toss her at Tamina! Tamina catches Nikki, Rhea says, “Sucker!” Tamina swings Nikki at Rhea but Rhea dodges to dropkick them both down! Nikki flounders out of the ring and Rhea drags Tamina up to fire off hands. The two brawl and things get rough! Tamina ROCKS Rhea, tags in Natty, and they mug Rhea in the corner. Natty headlocks to a takeover, Rhea fights up and powers out of the headlock but then backs away before Natty runs in. Nikki tags in, and Rhea scoops Nikki to swing her boots into Natty! Nikki runs in, Natty blocks the wheelbarrow and puts Nikki in a corner! Natty fires off, Nikki elbows her back!

Nikki goes up, Tamina barks at her so Nikki jumps down to shoulder her! Natty CLUBS Nikki, drags her up to snapmare and basement dropkick! Tamina goes around the way and trips Rhea up! Then SUPERKICKS her into the steel steps! The Almost Super Hero and the Mosh Pit Kid are down as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns and Tamina covers Nikki. TWO, and Nikki gets to a corner. Tamina runs corner to corner but Nikki dodges the hip attack! Nikki and Tamina crawl, hot tag to Natty! Natty drags Nikki away, steps through but Nikki kicks her away! Hot tag to Rhea! Rhea rallies with short arm LARIATS! Ripcord and HEADBUTT, to then a snapmare. Rhea BLASTS Tamina then dropkicks Natty! Fans fire up with Rhea and she gets Natty up but Natty shoves her away. Rhea mule kicks, NORTHERN LIGHTS, bridging cover, TWO! Rhea seethes but she calls to Nikki. Nikki tags in, Rhea holds Natty in place and Nikki climbs. CROSSBODY! Cover, TWO!

Tamina was also there, but Rhea SHOTGUN dropkicks her down! Natty waistlocks Rhea for a GERMAN SUPLEX! Natty storms after Nikki but Nikki elbows. Nikki reels Natty in, but no tornado DDT! DISCUS LARIAT! Rhea tags in quick as Natty drags Nikki away! Rhea gets in, pump handle and RIPTIDE! Cover, Rhea & Nikki win!

Winners: Rhea Ripley & Nikki A.S.H., by pinfall (NEW Contenders to the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships)

The champions got caught! With Tegan Nox & Shotzi Blackheart still waiting over on SmackDown, are Natty & Tamina going to have a double header come Extreme Rules?

 

MOIST TV debuts…?

It’s Johnny Drip Drip, “the only man moist enough to ride a dry Slip ‘n’ Slide.” The Aquaholics get the very first edition of Morrison’s own talk show, and Morrison would’ve had Miz as his guest, except he couldn’t find Miz anywhere. So instead, it’s Karrion Kross! Kross doesn’t look happy to be here, but he has made quite the splash since being here. But aw, no hourglass? Morrison is a bit bummed, it was like Kross had that movie, Dune, in a glass case. But the baggage fees do add up. The folks are thirsty. What makes Kross tick? Kross “thanks” Morrison for having him as his first guest. And Kross is just someone who wants to make everyone’s worst dreams a reality.

Wow. Fascinating. So what’s next? Making Morrison suffer. Oh, really? Well that sounds like a threat but Morrison gets it, it is probably a euphemism. But we all know that someone who stirs up trouble with Morrison gets soaked with a Drip Stick. But what is really next? US title? World title? Eviscerating a #splashhole like AJ Styles or Sheamus? Those do sound like great ideas, so Kross will do all of those. After he eliminates Morrison from existence. Whoa, okay. Morrison’s been in this for two decades, and is still three decades ahead of Kross. He has faced The Undertaker, Kane, and the cool members of Degeneration X. Kross is trying to be scary and all but-

Kross tells Morrison to listen up. Morrison wanted answers, now he’ll get them in the ring. Kross will teach Morrison how to #FallAndPray. Kross storms off, but will he be the one washed away by America’s Moist Wanted?

John Morrison VS Karrion Kross!

Raw returns as the Guru of Greatness makes his entrance. The bell rings the two circle. They tie up, Morrison wants an arm but Kross whips him away. Morrison gets around, Eddy Gordo to forearm! Kross stays up, headlocks to a takeover and then shifts right to ground ‘n’ pound with forearms! Kross lets off to stomp Morrison, then hoists him up for a DOOMSDAY SAIDO! Kross isn’t done here, he goes for the Krossjacket! Morrison resists and gets the ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Kross lets off and Morrison gets to his Drip Stick! SQUIRT SQUIRT! Kross seethes as Morrison eggs him on. Kross BOOTS Morrison right down!

Kross won’t let Morrison make jokes! DOOMSDAY SAIDO UP AND OVER THE CORNER!! Morrison crashes and burns and fans go nuts! Kross goes out after Morrison and drags him back into the ring. Kross stalks around, sits Morrison up, KROSSJACKET!! Morrison’s eyes are rolling into the back of his head but not like Taker! Morrison is OUT, Kross wins!

Winner: Karrion Kross, by submission

Two weeks in a row, Morrison tries to swim in the deep waters and gets washed back to shore. Will Morrison ever get going if he’s to take on the Hollywood A-Lister? As for Kross, was destroying Johnny Drip Drip the win he needs to say he’s next for the gold?

 

Backstage interview with Nia Jax.

Does she have anything to say in response to Charlotte Flair from earlier? “I’d rather not waste my breath on Charlotte, but everything she said earlier was obviously a defense mechanism.” Charlotte freaked out cuz no one’s every overpowered her the way Nia did. And no matter how Charlotte sees it, Nia did splatter her. Now Charlotte’s talking about bashing Nia’s head in with that crown? “Good luck finding that, because I shoved it so far up her royal behind, she’ll have an easier time finding some dignity. Oh wait, she lost that, too.” Charlotte better get used to losing because Nia will finish what she started, and then come out of this the NEW Raw Women’s Champion. Thank you.

Raw Women’s Championship: Charlotte Flair VS Nia Jax w/ Shayna Baszler!

The Queen makes her entrance first, perhaps not wanting to follow the Irresistible Force. But will Charlotte still be on top of the division after having it out with Nia all over again?

Raw returns as the challenger makes her entrance, the Queen of Spades still willing to be by her side. The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see just exactly where the crown ends up in this rematch from last week!

But wait, Shayna speaks up? “Listen, Charlotte. I’m kinda with you, I’m not sure my partner here has what it takes to beat you twice in a row. We know do!” Nia is upset but Shayna seems to be returning the passive aggressive favor from last week. The real question here is, will Nia become champion? Or will she choke? Charlotte attacks and she scraps with Nia! They get into another one from last week and the ref has to try and pull them apart! Nia fires off hands, Charlotte shoves the ref away and the two glare at each other. They each egg the other on, then Nia smacks Charlotte! Charlotte bails out and invokes DX. Then she gets in Shayna’s face and says “Kiss my ass!”

The Queen gets her belt and looks to be leaving! But Shayna stays in her way to make sure there’s no running. Nia grabs Charlotte through the ropes! Nia hoists Charlotte up but Charlotte hotshots Nia back! Charlotte gets in but Nia CLOBBERS her! Nia waistlocks, Charlotte throws elbows to get free, and both women steady themselves. Nia back suplexes, Charlotte lands on her feet and CHOP BLOCKS! Charlotte puts Nia in a corner, she and Nia scrap more while Charlotte sets the leg up. Charlotte springboards but Nia avoids knee to knee contact to bump Charlotte off buckles. Nia seethes, drags Charlotte up and puts her up top to then throw forearms.

Nia climbs up and gets Charlotte up, but Charlotte blocks the superplex! Charlotte slips under to POWERBOMB Nia down! High stack cover, TWO!! Charlotte snarls and paces, then she stomps Nia in the leg. Charlotte pushes Nia around, gets a leg, then steps through, but Nia schoolgirls her into the corner! Charlotte clips buckles and flops out of the ring as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Charlotte has Nia down at the ramp. Charlotte climbs up a corner and fans fire up, ARIHARA MOONSAULT!! Direct hit and Charlotte fires up! Charlotte gets Nia up and then sees Shayna! Shayna runs in, Charlotte dodges, and Shayna keeps from hitting Nina. The two stand off, there was almost a mistake made. Though, would it be a mistake for Shayna. Nia gets in, Charlotte runs in but Nia pops her up! Charlotte sunset flips through but Nia drags her up with both hands for a HEADBUTT! Nia runs in to SPLASH Charlotte in the corner! Nia hoists Charlotte up top, Shayna climbs up but why? Shayna is trying to explain things now?!

SUPER NATURAL SELECTION!! Cover, Charlotte wins!

Winner: Charlotte Flair, by pinfall (still Raw Women’s Champion)

The Queen of Spades is smirking! Did she do that just to screw over Nia? As for Charlotte, Alexa Bliss calls to her from the titantron. “Now that you’re done fighting, I think it’s time for some fun. So Lily and I would like to officially invite you to come join us on our Playground.” Oh and can Charlotte bring one of her fancy robes she wears? Lily wants to try one on. What does Charlotte say? “Of course Lily’s a fan. Isn’t that cute? Except…! The Queen doesn’t do cute and I’m not interested in your mind games, Alexa. And I’m definitely not coming to the Playground!”

Well shucks. Just, they’ve got a lot of pent up energy. Does Charlotte know what it’s like to be cooped up “with a maniacal, out of control, lunatic?” Wait, of course Charlotte does! She’s a Flair. Anywhozle, if Charlotte’s not coming to them… They’ll just bring the Playground to her. The lights start to flicker and change, and then ALEXA shows up right behind Charlotte! Fans are loving this but Charlotte looks over her shoulder at Alexa. “Obviously you want something, Alexa. What is it?” Alexa smirks and looks to the fans before pointing at the title. Oh, this? Alexa wants a title match? Alexa smiles and fans cheer, “YES! YES! YES!”

Charlotte says fine! “But this isn’t your playground. It’s mine!” The Queen leaves but Alexa still smiles. Will Alexa be smiling even brighter when she gets that gold?

 

WWE 24/7 Championship: Reggie VS Akira Tozawa!

Once again, the title that can be defended anywhere at any time will work to stay within the confines of a ring. Will the slick and slippery sommelier be able to keep the Stamina Monster from taking this title back? Or will there be plenty of tricks up Tozawa’s sleeves to finally catch the champ?

Raw returns as Tozawa makes his entrance. The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see if there’s still time on the clock for Reggie.

Tozawa rushes in, Reggie handsprings and goes Matrix to evade. Tozawa fireman’s carries, Reggie slips off and dropsaults! Then sobats and runs to SOMERSAULT AX KICK! Reggie gets the fans fired up as he aims from the corner. Tozawa turns around into the SOMERSAULT SEATED SENTON! Cover, Reggie wins!

Winner: Reggie, by pinfall (still WWE 24/7 Champion)

But now R-Truth rushes out to get his turn! Truth runs in, Reggie dodges and Truth falls out of the ring! But now Cedric Alexander comes in, only for Reggie to go up and over and around! The same for Humberto Carrillo, with Reggie redirecting him right out of the ring! Now Drew Gulak, Jaxson Ryker and even Jeff Hardy try, but Reggie FLIES out onto them all! Reggie gets his belt and heads out, only for DRAKE MAVERICK to return!? Rockstar Spud is back on Raw, but Truth runs in! Reggie dodges Truth, Truth stops short of hitting Maverick.

Since when is Maverick here? This is Truth’s show, Truth’s time and Truth’s baby. Maverick should go home to his wife. Good seeing you, but bad timing. Maverick smirks, is he not just here for the 24/7 title?

 

Backstage interview with “Doudrop.”

Did last week put any of the issues with Eva Marie to bed? Piper Niven says that karma has a funny way of coming back around on people like Eva. “Eva has a history of bailing on matches, so I didn’t want to give her a chance to get cold feet again.” Piper capitalized on a rare moment where Eva was actually in the ring, and she got #Doudropped. Piper is not surprised that the “self-centered, egotistical, talentless wretched wench” couldn’t make it to Raw tonight, but she’s far from through with Eva. Karma is just coming back around again. That’s why Piper wants a rematch. If you thought the beatdown from last week was brutal, next week will be unforgettable!

Eva tortured Piper for months under the guise of “Evalution~,” but that’s just a delusion. Time to usher in a new era: The Doudropalution! Will Eva finally learn something about respect and humility when Piper brings her crashing down again?

 

Raw Tag Team Championship #1 Contenders Tag Turmoil, resumed!

As sore as they are, Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods return to the ring to finish what was started! Will the New Day rock their way to the end of this gauntlet? Or will Mansoor & Ali regroup and remember their strategy?

Raw returns as Ali & Mansoor make their entrances. RKBRO is back at ringside to watch this, just as they were earlier. The teams sort out and Kofi starts with Mansoor. They tie up, Kofi waistlocks then shifts to an armlock. Mansoor works on an escape but Kofi wrenches through. Mansoor uses ropes to rebound and arm-drag free, then things speed up! Ali holds ropes open and Kofi tumbles out! Woods hurries over and Ali tags in. Mansoor also goes out to stand in Woods’ way as Ali puts Kofi in the ring. Ali waves tauntingly at RKBRO before he covers Kofi, ONE! Ali clamps onto a chinlock and he grinds Kofi down.

Fans rally up, Kofi fights to his feet, and Kofi throws body shots. Ali CLUBS Kofi, whips but Kofi reveres for SOS! Both men are down as Riddle cheers Kofi. Hot tag to Woods and he rallies on Ali! Woods whips Ali to drop toehold him to ropes, then runs to dropkick Ali in the back! Woods gets Ali up but Ali RAMS Woods into the corner! Mansoor tags in, he brings Woods out to CLUB him, then Mansoor Electric Chair lifts. Ali climbs but Woods fights free! Woods shoves Mansoor into Ali, Kofi runs into go up and over Mansoor! Kofi has Ali up for a SUPERPLEX! Those two writhe their way out of the ring, Woods rolls Mansoor, TWO!

Woods CHOPS Mansoor but Mansoor grits his teeth. Woods fireman’s carries but the back bothers him! Mansoor rolls Woods, TWO! Mansoor CLUBS Woods on the back but the ref has him back off. The ref checks Woods’ back but Ali wants Mansoor to show no mercy! Mansoor says that’s not right, Woods could be seriously hurt. Ali tags himself in then KICKS Woods in the back! Woods checks his fingers but Ali KICKS him again! Woods ducks the third kick to bogy shot and HEADBUTT! Woods staggers, Kofi tags in! Kofi goes up and leaps to CROSSBODY! Then he KNEES Mansoor down! Kofi runs at Ali but into a SUPERKICK!

Ali puts Kofi in a drop zone and climbs up, 450 but he has to bail out as Kofi dodges! Tag to Woods, TROUBLE IN PARADISE! Ali is down, Woods climbs and walks the tightrope, LIMIT BREAKER!! Cover, Kofi CLOBBERS Mansoor, the New Day ELIMINATES Mansoor & Ali! RKBRO has to applaud the toughness, but here come the phenomenal former champions! Does the New Day stand a chance of making it through another round?

The New Day VS AJ Styles & Omos!

Raw returns and Styles hits a BACKBREAKER on Woods! Styles takes his time before he gets Woods’ arms for a motorcycle stretch! Riddle and the fans still rally for Woods, and Woods fights up, only for Styles to reel Woods in. Woods ducks, shoves Styles away but then Styles TACKLES Woods before the tag! Styles rains down forearms into Woods’ back, then he whips Woods to a corner hard! Woods bounces off buckles and writhes, but Styles looms over him as they go to ropes. Styles gets Woods up and RAMS his shoulder into Woods’ back. The ref counts, Styles lets off and he grins as he brings Woods around.

Woods throws hands, Styles CLUBS Woods down again, then stomps him. Styles steps to Kofi but then puts Woods in the corner. Tag to Omos and now the big man grabs Woods. Woods tries to get away but Omos taunts Kofi as he CLUBS Woods down again! Styles and Omos are having fun now as Omos stands on Woods’ back! The ref counts, Omos roars but steps away at 4. Omos drags Woods up, throws him to the corner, then taunts Kofi more. Styles gets cheap shots in but Woods knocks Styles down! Omos runs in to SPLASH Woods from behind! Riddle is horrified but Styles tags in to cover, TWO!

Styles snarls, stays between Woods and Kofi and then brings Woods up for a snap suplex! Cover, TWO! Kofi and fans rally for Woods but Styles keeps him down with a chinlock. Styles digs his knee into Woods, Riddle and the fans rally but Woods fights up. Woods throws hands, Styles throws him down! Styles paces, KICKS Woods’ leg, stomps the foot, then talks trash. Omos tells Styles to do more and Styles KICKS Woods in the leg again. Styles gets Woods up but Woods fires forearms and a ROLLING ELBOW! Styles actually falls out of the ring! Woods crawls, fans fire up but Styles returns! Kofi avoids the cheap shot but Woods rolls Styles up! TWO!! Woods LARIATS Styles down!

Fans fire up as both men are down! Woods and Styles crawl, even Riddle joins in on the clapping. Hot tags to Omos and Kofi! Kofi springboards but Omos SWATS him!! Omos tells RKBRO that’ll happen to them, too! Omos roars and then soaks up the heat as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns once again, Omos taunting Kofi as he tags in Styles. Styles drags Kofi up and puts him in a corner to hoist him up top. Styles climbs up, fans rally and duel but Kofi fights back with body shots and clubbing forearms! Kofi headbutts Styles down, leaps and FLYING STOMPS Styles down! Kofi flounders as RKBRO is even more invested in this match. Styles runs in but Kofi dodges and Styles gets buckles! Kofi fires off fists, but Styles elbows him away! Styles goes up and QUEBRADAS! Styles manages to get the dragon sleeper but Kofi snapmares free! TROUBLE IN PARADISE!! Both men are down but Kofi crawls to a cover, only for Omos to break it!

Woods runs in but Omos choke grips! Woods fights as beset he can but Omos still TOSSES him out! Kofi fires off on Omos, Omos shoves him away and then hoists him up to hand off to Styles! STYLES CLASH!! Cover, Styles & Omos ELIMINATE the New Day!! But now we all know who is last and far from least…

AJ Styles & Omos VS Bobby Lashley & MVP!

The WWE World Champion will gladly be a greedy SOB if it means taking the fight to the Viper and The Bro. Will Lashley demolish the Phenomenal and the Mountain if it means getting at the gold?

MVP starts for his team, though, and Styles welcomes it. But Miami is MVP country so they’re on his side. MVP then says nah, and tags out to Lashley! Lashley and Styles circle, Styles kicks low and headlocks. Lashley powers up to SLAM Styles down! Lashley whips Styles hard into a corner, and Styles even bounces off the post! Riddle is horrified again but Orton just glares as Lashley fires off forearms and elbows into Styles! Lashley digs his fingers into Styles’ face but lets off as the ref counts. Lashley paces around, drags Styles up but Styles fires off a Phenomenal Blitz! Lashley blocks the backhand and back suplexes but Styles lands on his feet!

Lashley runs, Styles ducks and PELES! Lashley staggers, Styles gets away and now Omos tags in! Fans really like this one! Omos is fired up but Lashley flexes on him. Omos says those don’t measure up! Lashley and Omos tie up with knuckle locks for a test of strength! The two are evenly matched, and there might be a NEW All Mighty! But Lahsley kicks low, and again, then RAMS Omos into a corner! And RAMS him again and again and again! Omos looks mortal as Lashley brings him around for- No, OMOS suplexes Lashley! And then GOURD BUSTERS him! RKBRO are impressed for sure as Lashley gets to ropes. Omos runs in, and he BOOTS Lashley out of the ring!

Lashley ends up at the feet of the Viper, and the Bro gives them space. Lashley dares Orton to do something but Orton says Omos is his concern. Styles tags in and he leaps off commentary to wipe out BOTH Lashley and Orton! Riddle says to watch it, Lashley is the one in the match. But then Omos TOSSES Riddle into barriers! Styles bumps Lashley off steps and drags him into the ring. But MVP comes around to go after Styles! Styles kicks the bad leg then ENZIGURIS MVP down! Then Omos TOSSES Riddle over the announce desk! Styles aims at Lashley in the ring, prepares his arm, and springboards to PHENOMENAL- Lashley dodges to SPEAR!!! Cover, Lashley & MVP win!!

Winners: Bobby Lashley & MVP, by pinfall (NEW #1 Contenders to the Raw Tag Team Championships)

But Omos isn’t done with Lashley! TWO HAND SLAM!!! Just because Lashley’s a greedy SOB doesn’t mean Omos has to let him feel good about it! Will Omos and Styles simply wait on the other side of the Hurt Business VS RKBRO? Speaking of, RKO OUTTA NOWHERE!! Lashley goes down and the fans are thunderous for the Viper! Will Orton and Riddle make sure to humble and hurt the Chief Hurt Officer before the Extreme Rules showdown?


My Thoughts:

This feels odd. Raw was really good but also not… We got an awesome match out of McIntyre VS Sheamus, and I did not expect Sheamus to win. At the same time, McIntyre’s frustration building makes for good story as he heads ever closer to the WWE US Championship and the career Grand Slam. I suppose Extreme Rules isn’t quite big enough for that moment, but I feel like McIntyre will have to be waiting a long time at this rate. But one thing that’s a bit of a lower point is that something in Priest’s promo just made it feel less genuine to him and more like a writer trying to sound like him to keep him scripted. Priest VS Sheamus yet again will still be a very good match, but I hope they don’t take this off Priest until it is McIntyre facing him.

Good to see Natalya back, the match with Rhea & Nikki was good, but there’s a lot to the RawDown Women’s Tag Division that needs fixing. Nia and Shayna are on the rocks so I can literally only think of three times in it: the champions, and now the two teams that are going to be challenging them. I actually would appreciate if they gave us a Triple Threat for the titles at Extreme Rules, just to get everything out of the way while also giving us rare interaction between Rhea & Nikki with Shotzi & Tegan, but WWE has just been shooting themselves in the foot and choking the life out of their own rosters so I have no idea who wins or how the WWE can dig themselves out of this.

Morrison getting his parody of MIZ TV does make some sense, but boy was it awkward because it was as a pre-filmed backstage segment. Mostly because they didn’t want the fans to hijack it and razz on Kross the entire time. From this last few days in NXT, it was clear Kross isn’t seen as the most exciting wrestler, but things have really gone sideways for him with how Vince is too involved in the details. But at least they did what I was hoping for last week: Morrison VS Kross. Morrison could’ve looked better here, but I suppose Kross still has to look good for the weird reasons Vince has stored away somewhere. Maybe Morrison faces Keith Lee so Keith can at least get something.

Charlotte VS Nia happening here was a bit of a surprise, as was them doubling down on the scrappy, chippy nature of things from last week. I don’t think fans got that into it this week, they wanted to see a real and competitive match from these two. Plus, Shayna interfered in her own way and that’s why Charlotte won. A lame ending for what could’ve been really good here. But Alexa Bliss wanting next makes sense. They’ve kept her on the outside of things rather awkwardly, so now she’s getting back into the main story, and we’ll just have to cross our fingers that Vince doesn’t overdo the cheesier parts of Alexa’s and Lily’s supernatural powers.

I still don’t like that Piper Niven is sticking to this Doudrop stuff, but she seems to be committing to it so her promo went smoothly. Since Piper crushed Eva easily last time, I have a bad feeling Eva finds a way to get even with her and they keep this going until we get something at Extreme Rules, which makes sense on some level because of how they hyped #EvaLution to be this big thing. And while Reggie is still very exciting with his flips and tricks, I’m more intrigued by Drake Maverick being back on Raw after seeing him on NXT just last week. I liked the touch of keeping continuity, Truth bringing up Maverick’s wife because of their 24/7 title saga. I wouldn’t mind if Maverick was used to bring some seriousness to this title and really show his own grit and toughness at some point.

Then THE story of the night, to the point of making it what bookended the entire show. First, I do appreciate more of the crossover of the world title and the tag titles, though clearly they’ve crafted it to be just through Lashley and Orton, no room for anyone else. The New Day had another all-time performance tonight, lasting as long as they did through both halves of the gauntlet. All the teams looked good but New Day were the MVP team tonight. T-Bar and Mace get to really wreck shop, I hope those guys are waiting somewhere on the other side of Extreme Rules, even with how things turned out tonight. Of course Lashley & MVP win so they can keep things going with RKBRO, but I feel like title status quo is kept because I don’t see WWE doing double champions again for a long time.

My Score: 8.4/10


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Mitchell’s ROH Death Before Dishonor Results & Report! (7/26/24)

YEEHAW!

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The word of the day is, “Gold!”

ROH brings Death Before Dishonor to Texas, and makes it bigger than ever! SIX championship matches, how drastically will the landscape change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – MXM Collection VS Spanish Announce Project; wins.
  • Komander VS The Beast Mortos; wins.
  • Texas Deathmatch: Leyla Hirsch VS Diamante; wins.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championship Qualifier: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS The Dark Order; wins and advances to Battle of the Belts 11.
  • ROH World Tag Team Championships: The Kingdom VS Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O’Reilly; win(s) and
  • ROH World Television Championship Survival of the Fittest: Atlantis Jr. VS Lio Rush VS Shane Taylor VS Johnny TV VS Lee Johnson VS Brian Cage; wins and
  • ROH Pure Championship: Wheeler Yuta VS Lee Moriarty; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship: Billie Starkz VS Red Velvet; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Championship: Athena VS Queen Aminata; wins and
  • ROH World Championship: Mark Briscoe VS Roderick Strong; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 7.25.2024

Slammiversary Fallout! Where do things go on the way to Victory Road?

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Well now we start the fall out of Slammiversary. Josh Alexander in his bad bitch summer, X-Speedball legacy, ABC got the t-a-g and Jordynne is still in charge of the Knockouts division. Like I said at the end of Slammiversary, all of the champions being Babyfaces is stupid. They need to drop a couple titles fairly quickly, because I don’t care what some people say, Nic Nemeth ain’t gonna bring any eyes to the brand. He’s about as hot as day old Hamburger Helper over a camping sterno.

We’ll probably open with the luke warm champion, so tune in like 10 minutes late for anything of substance to be happen.

https://x.com/i/status/1816629254349533588

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner: Maclin wins via KIA – *
  • AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan: AJ wins via Down Payment – **
  • Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young): Hammer Your ASH wins via Torture Rack – ** 1/2
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey): Broken Alphabet wins via Twist & Splash – ***

 

Results:

Nemeth gives the ole “I’ll be a fighting champion…blah blah” promo and drops the “any company” line that we’ve already understood what that means. Campaign Singh cuts him off…and I never thought I’d be happy for Campaign Singh to walk out and say anything…ever. And…Mustafa’s promo is worse than Dolph’s. He’s gone from parody to caricature even saying “it was the biggest screw job Montreal ever saw”. Like some of these lines are cheap heat, but most are just brain dead comments that wouldn’t get a reaction out of anyone (and the crowd was silent for that comment). Mustafa gets caught in an Archer “phrasing” moment about getting screwed hard, but this is painful. Promos written by 14 year olds everyone…

This ends with Ali challenging Nemeth for the World Title. While I’m not against walk up challenges, I watch Japanese wrestling, I don’t really get the point aside from doing it just to do it. 

ABC and Matt Hardy have a small promo, and I’m still not really a fan of Unbroken Matt Version 6.0. The floating between Broken voice and his normal voice sounds amateurish.

OH LOOK, finally a match 20 minutes into the show. And it’s my son Steve Maclin! OH CHRIST he’s facing Deaner. This has been 25 minutes of talking followed by the worst god damn attempt at a gimmick. Deaner’s little “Papa Santino told me I can wipe my ass only if the crowd agrees”. This gimmick should die in a fire.

Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner

Deaner started off quick because Maclin was in disbelief that Deaner was actually gonna fight him. Maclin dodges a Crossbody, Busaiku Knee, and just starts beating on Deaner for fun. And this is fun, maybe Maclin can make sure Deaner gets stretchered out and written off forever. How do you call for an ambulance in French? Maclin with the old Back Breaker into a stretch. Deaner tries to nerd rage up, breaks the Back Breaker Stretch, his punch combo, into a Manhattan Drop and Bulldog. Deaner hits the Crossbody, but Maclin kicks out. This is entirely too competitive.

Deaner goes for the Deaner DDT, blocked, Olympic Slam into Splashing Deaner into the corner, Caught in the Crosshairs, K-I-A, thanks for coming you damn dweeb. Stay in Canada and don’t travel Deaner, please.

https://x.com/i/status/1816633784537874761

AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan

As the bell sounds, Sami knocks Rich off the apron, Low Bridges AJ, does the Beats of the Bodhran on AJ and then AJ eats the offense and strategizes with his crew. Bishop and Rich swarm the ring, Sami allows himself to get distracted so AJ slides in and starts beating on Sami. AJ throats Sami across the middle rope and Rich makes his presence felt, AJ distracts the referee and Rich gets in a lot of cheap shots. Bishop throws Sami back in the ring, and AJ keeps up the pressure. Lots of 5 count chokes and leverage moves. After the commercial break ends, Sami dodges a Tennessee Whiskey Knee, gets in a few shots before Rich trips Sami as he’s setting up a Dive, and then AJ takes advantage of the position and hits the goofball knee strike.

AJ calls for his Chokeslam, Sami tries to break it with Axe Handles, then claws the eyes. Sami goes for a Scoop Slam, gets him part way up and then falls over. AJ Chokeslam again, but he bites his hand and starts fighting back. Launches himself at AJ, sends him bouncing off the ropes and uses the momentum to hit that Scoop Slam that was teased earlier. Sami goes for a Western Lariat but eats a Big Boot. AJ does a little Hulk Hogan pose to signal a Leg Drop, but Sami dodges and then connects on a Sliding Lariat. Thumbs Up, Thumbs….interference. Rich distracts the ref, Bishop lays out Sami, AJ connects with the Down Payment.

Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young)

ASH and Jordynne exchange slaps and then Jordynne starts to out muscle ASH. Spinebuster from Jordynne, Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights off, rope run, Sattelite DDT into both tagging out. EY does the Flair corner flop, slides back in between Hammer’s legs, and connects on a Neckbreaker. EY is the quicker of the two, but Hammer finally gets his hands on him and a Release Belly to Belly into a full mount raining of fists, then a near fall. Hammer smashes EY in a corner, Arm Wringer into an Irish Whip across, but EY moves and Hammer tags out to ASH. ASH levels Jordynne, peppers EY with a few shots and pulls him back to their corner and starts some tandem offense with Hammerman. Hammer Guerilla Presses ASH and throws her into EY for a near fall. Hammer looks to aim for either a Powerbomb or Nightmare Pendulum, but EY drops it into a Small Package, pinfall kick out, they both run, Double Lariat spot. The Knockouts get tagged in.

Jordynne is in control early, World’s Strongest Slam into a Vader Bomb. Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights it off and tags out to Hammer. Jordynne and EY do some schoolyard stuff with the old Push while Jordynne is down to trip Hammer. All four get in, ASH gets leveled, EY gets leveled, Hammer and Jordynne have a brief face off, but Hammer throws Jordynne to the apron and ASH connects with a Meteora from the apron. Death Valley Driver from Young on Hammer, ASH stares in shock, EY tells her to get, ASH runs away. EY goes up for his Macho Elbow, and ASH causes him to fall to Hammer’s feet, Torture Rack, and EY submits.

Josh Alexander comes out, with new heel music. And it’s not that bad, definitely better than some other people’s new music. Josh yells at the crowd a bit, says he can’t wait til he’s back in a real Canadian town, like his home of Toronto. Then he drops the mic in lieu of an explanation. The crowd chants him off with the “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey”. 

https://x.com/i/status/1816647373654724937

The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey)

JDC and Hardy start, but JDC quickly tags out to Myers and that doesn’t go well. Hardy grabs a hold of Myers, a few Delete chops, drags him to his corner and they all get in a few shots punctuated with Hardy getting tagged back in and an Elbow into Myers’ extended and worked on left arm. Myers stays isolated, back into the corner, Boot to the gut, Ace tags in and wallops Myers. Ace connects on Double Kicks, into Russian Leg Sweep and his half of Click Click Boom, for a 2 count. Myers finally gets free with a Jaw Breaker and tags out to Eddie. But The System gets no momentum, Ace stifles Eddie’s offense and starts a few quick tags with him and Bey for tandem offense. Moose finally comes down the ramp as Eddie kicked out of yet another pinfall attempt because The System has had nothing going for them. Eddie finally gets some offense since Moose was a big enough distraction.

Eddie thinks they have a spot, so he tags back in JDC, but The ABC stop him cold, tag in Matt Hardy, and Matt walks down JDC, but JDC Low Bridges. Matt is on the outside, so all of The System surrounds Hardy, then Joe Hendry’s music hits! That stops the heel beatdown, and we follow Hendry’s entire entrance. So that proves Hendry is bigger than the 8 other people in this frame. Not really sure if that’s optics you want to push along. Ace and JDC try to remind people there’s wrestling going on, but JDC thumbs the eye to get a little something going. Vertical Suplex for a near fall, tag out for Eddie and Eddie lights up Ace with some of those NOAH Chops. Ace retreats to the ropes and Alisha chokes him with the ropes while the ref is distracted.

Myers gets tagged in, Ace tries to use the crowd energy, Myers stops it at first but then Ace slips a Scoop Slam and tags out to Bey. Hot tag, strike rush, Double Stomp, educated feet, Leap Frog to the corner but Lish climbs on the apron and yells at Bey which stops his rhythm. Myers kicks his feet out and causes Bey to crash. Eddie tags in for a few shots, then to JDC and Slingshot Knees, Wringer Snapmare, Bow and Arrow Submission, and JDC is just doing solid wrestling work right now. Uppercut between the Shoulder Blades as Bey tries to get out, tag to Myers and Bey is still eating offense. Eddie tags in, Bey tries the Sunset Flip, but Eddie tags out before going over, so Myers folds up Bey for a near fall and then tags out to JDC who connects on a Standing Suplex, slams Bey’s face into the corner, Eddie tags in, and Bey finally fights up to his feet, Eddie just flatten Bey’s comeback, tries a Tiger Driver but eats an Enzuigiri for a simultaneous tag. JDC and Hardy come in, JDC tries to exit halfway in, but Hardy is wrecking shop. He disposes of Eddie, Myers slides in but eats a tandem Neckbreaker/DDT from Hardy. Face team does the Delete Corner Face Smashes. Poetry in Motion into a Side Effect into Corkscrew Swanton for only 2 since Myers breaks it up! Everyone throwing hands, referee is distracted, Moose comes in to Spear Hardy, but Hardy dodges and throws him into JDC (I get the call back), Hendry then lays out Moose with the big Lariat. Twist of Fate from Hardy, Splash from Bey, Broken Alphabet wins!

 

Overall Score: 4/10

Ugh, cliche promos, too damn much talking, a competitive squash match with an imbecile as our first “match”, into an overbooked and slow heel match, finally a decent tag match (with the right team going over), into another overbooked match with a “tease” for the mystery backup being more obvious than Jericho’s WWF debut.

Aside from the afore mentioned tag match, The Rascalz promo and The System Promo; this was hard to watch. A lot of cornball promos, Rosemary licks her conspiracy board, storylines got zero traction. Whoopity Doo, Ryan Nemeth got a match next week and we get an undead wedding.

While this was a bad episode, it was bad by at least new standards. We’re not back in the TNA Dark Days again, but this was…a useless show.


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