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Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (3/25/22)

The PENULTIMATE SmackDown!

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SmackDown 2022

SmackDown is revving up for WrestleMania!

Last week, Brock Lesnar almost took Roman Reigns’ head! This week, will the Tribal Chief even return to SmackDown knowing Lesnar’s still hunting him?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Jimmy Uso w/ Jey Uso VS Shinsuke Nakamura w/ Rick Boogs; Nakamura wins.
  • Kofi Kingston VS Ridge Holland w/ Sheamus & “Butch” Pete Dunne; changed to…
  • Xavier Woods w/ Kofi Kingston VS Ridge Holland w/ Sheamus & “Butch” Pete Dunne; Woods wins.
  • Championship Contenders Match: Ricochet VS Angel Garza w/ Humberto Carrillo; Garza wins and has an Intercontinental Championship opportunity.
  • Championship Contenders Match: Ricochet VS Humberto Carrillo w/ Angel Garza; Carillo wins and also has an Intercontinental Championship opportunity.
  • Fatal 4 Way: Sasha Banks w/ Naomi VS Rhea Ripley w/ Liv Morgan VS Shayna Baszler w/ Natalya VS Queen Zelina Vega w/ Carmella; Sasha wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Brock Lesnar waits outside Roman Reigns’ room.

Kayla Braxton asks him if he’s thought about the consequences of last week. Well, Roman had time to think. Lesnar’s paid fines, bought some vehicles, and he even got Roman a new SUV. In his favorite color, too: blood red. And management had a little talk with Lesnar. Lesnar is not to make physical contact unless provoked. So… Tonight, Lesnar will just hang out in Roman’s locker room and wait for that provoking. Lesnar steps in through the doors, walks around. This is what Roman gets? Nice. Lesnar helps himself to some grapes, puts his hat on a lap and takes a seat at the couch. Lesnar puts his feet up on the table and breaks it! Will he do the same to the Head of the Table?

 

Rick Boogs makes his entrance!

He gets the call ‘n’ response with Brooklyn, and he’s here to rock with one-half of the future SmackDown Tag Team Champions! Shinsukeee… NakamurAAAAAA~! McAfee rocks out as the King of Strong Style makes his way to the ring, but will Nakamura avenge Boogs by taking out the other Uso?

Jimmy Uso w/ Jey Uso VS Shinsuke Nakamura w/ Rick Boogs!

After a recap from last week, the Usos make their entrance, and then they go right after Nakamura and Boogs! Nakamura fights back, Boogs lifts Jey! Boogs presses Jey like last week, and throws him at Jimmy! The Usos go down and fans fire up as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and this match begins! They tie up, break, then tie up again. They break again, tie up, and Jimmy headlocks. Nakamura powers out but Jimmy runs him over! The Usos say #WeTheOnes but Nakamura is up. He gets around Jimmy to waistlock, but Jimmy wrenches out to a wristlock. Nakamura endures as Jimmy twists the wrist, but Nakamura rolls and kips up to wrench and cartwheel to wrench back! Nakamura hammerlocks, headlocks, but Jimmy pulls hair. Jimmy headlocks, Nakamura powers out, but Jimmy runs him over again! But Nakamura rolls Jimmy, only for Jimmy to avoid the buzzsaw!

Nakamura says HE the one, and then says, “C’MON~!” Jimmy snarls, he runs in, but into a knee! Snapmare and knee drop! Nakamura drags Jimmy up, bumps him off buckles, then more buckles. Nakamura bumps Jimmy off a third corner, then gives him GOOD VIBRATIONS! The ref counts, Nakamura lets off and Jimmy bails out. Nakamura slides out to CLUB Jimmy and put him on the apron. Nakamura has Jey move aside, so he can run and KNEE Jimmy back in! Nakamura slides in, but Jimmy CLOBBERS him! Jimmy drags Nakamura up, for a BIG back suplex! Cover, TWO!

Jimmy grows frustrated but he clamps on a chinlock. Jimmy grinds Nakamura down, Nakamura endures and fights up, but Jimmy pushes him down to drop a knee! Jimmy clamps the chinlock back on but Nakamura fights back up. Jimmy throws Nakamura down by his hair! The fans boo as the Usos say #WeTheOnes again, then Jimmy fireman’s carries. Nakamura gets to the apron, shoulders back in, and blocks the boot, only to get the DRAGON WHIP! Down goes Nakamura! Boogs coaches Nakamura on but Jey applauds Jimmy. Jimmy builds speed, but into a GAMANGIRI! Jimmy tumbles down and Nakamura fires up as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and Jimmy has Nakamura in a chinlock. Nakamura throws body shots, Jimmy scoops but Nakamura slips off! Nakamura runs to DYNAMIC DROPKICK! Fans fire up with Nakamura, he fires off a strike fest, but Jimmy blocks a kick to get an ENZIGURI! Nakamura whips, Jimmy reverses, but Nakamura knees back! Nakamura puts Jimmy up top, rolls and runs to TOP SHELF KNEE! Cover, TWO! Nakamura throws knees into Jimmy’ shead ‘n’ shoulders, then stomps him! Nakamura drags Jimmy up, wraps on a chinlock, but Jimmy fights the exploder! Jimmy elbows free and CHOPS!

Nakamura is in a corner., he BOOTS back, then goes up! FLYING KNEE! Boogs is fired up for Nakamura and Nakamura goes to the corner! “YAO~!” But Jey CLOBBERS Boogs! Nakamura notices that and glares at Jey! But Jimmy SUPERKICKS Nakamura! Cover, TWO!! Nakamura survives and Brooklyn is fired up while the Usos are furious! Jimmy tells Jey to get Boogs’ guitar! They’re gonna do like they did last week! But Boogs stops Jey! They fight over the Gibson and Boogs POSTS Jey! Jimmy is freaking out, he ducks a roundhouse but not the WHEEL KICK! Nakamura aims, KINSHASA!! Cover, Nakamura wins!

Winner: Shinsuke Nakamura, by pinfall

The King of Strong Style and Boogs celebrate! They’ve gone 2-0 on the Usos 1v1, but will they be able to use this momentum to take those tag titles?

 

Lesnar is still lounging in the Tribal Chief suite.

He’s basically gone through all the grapes, but he hates the champagne. He spits it out, and throws the bottle at the wall. But will he get a palate cleanser in the form of beating up Roman Reigns?

 

Next week is the WWE Hall of Fame!

It’ll be on after SmackDown, live in Dallas and on the Peacock! There, Vince McMahon will induct The Undertaker, and the late, great Shad Gaspard will be given the Ultimate Warrior Award.

 

Backstage interview with Drew McIntyre.

Kayla knows the Scottish Warrior goes 1v1 with the “undefeated” Happy Corbin. But McIntyre knows where this is going. Can’t compare Corbin and McIntyre’s previous opponents because this is personal. Corbin tried to end McIntyre’s career but he wasn’t successful. McIntyre has loved every single second of making Corbin’s live a living hell! It makes McIntyre feel something inside. It makes him… happy. McIntyre could’ve taken Corbin out at any time, but he wants to do it at WrestleMania with the most eyes watching! And McIntyre will wipe that stupid, smug, pathetic grin off Corbin’s face… permanently!

 

Corbin reflects on his last 12 months.

Can you believe how low he was last Summer? 2021 was the most challenging year of his life. He lost all his money, his possessions, and even his wife and kids. He was at rock bottom. He was so desperate, he want to Las Vegas with his last $20 and turned it into millions! He got all those things back. Only poor people say money doesn’t buy you happiness! Now he has wealth, fame, and the most hilarious best friend, “Mad Cap” Riddick Moss! He is undefeated since becoming Happy, and his best day was Day One, when McIntyre “stuck his neck out” for Corbin. Corbin beat down the Scottish Psycho again and again, made fun of him each time, and knows his happiness will become euphoria when he finally ends McIntyre’s career!

Corbin and Moss watch that video package.

“Un-de-feated! My life is an inspiration!” They could do a movie! Or a trilogy! Part one: get rich. Part two: destroy McIntyre at Day One. Part Three: embarrass McIntyre at WrestleMania! He could even get an Oscar: Happiest man alive as he celebrates over McIntyre’s limp body. Moss even has an idea for the title! Bald Fellas! Corbin isn’t laughing. Moss’ humor seems to be missing the mark lately. Will he have to work on getting new material in time for the most stupendous fight of Corbin’s career?

 

Kofi Kingston VS Ridge Holland w/ Sheamus & “Butch” Pete Dunne!

Kofi tried to avenge Big E’s broken neck last week, but the chaos caused by the Celtic Warrior and Bruiserweight allowed Ridge to hit him with Northern Grit. Will Kofi be better prepared this time and finally get even?

SmackDown returns as Kofi makes his entrance, and he has a mic. He says that when he told these guys Ridge was having a match with a New Day member, Kofi didn’t mean himself. Oh~ no~! But if not Kofi, then who? Who who who? KING XAVIER WOODS! The King of the Ring is back, and now he will battle for the honor of Big E! Will Woods and his even shinier crown exact vengeance upon Sheamus’ sidekick?

Xavier Woods w/ Kofi Kingston VS Ridge Holland w/ Sheamus & “Butch” Pete Dunne!

The bell rings and Woods mule kicks! And CHOPS! And fires off forearms and haymakers! Ridge ROCKS Woods, whips him to ropes, but Woods ducks and dodges to slide and mule kick a leg! Woods runs, but Ridge runs to POUNCE Woods! Ridge roars and Sheamus gloats while fans boo. Ridge talks trash on Kofi, he drags Woods up, but Woods cradles! WOODS WINS!

Winner: Xavier Woods, by pinfall

The New Day gets away, having just punked out Ridge! Will The Fella and his boys want after ya bois, the NEW~ DAY?

 

SmackDown receives a message from Paul Heyman.

The Special Counsel introduces himself, and then introduces the Tribal Chief. Roman says he knows Brooklyn is dying to acknowledge their Tribal Chief but that’ll have to wait. Roman and Heyman have handled business all over the city, and they ate at Del Frisco’s steakhouse. Easily the best in the whole city. And the sides, oh! At least 5 grand worth. And then they stopped by Madison Square Garden, the place Roman busted Lesnar open in. How can anyone forget? And while on that subject, Roman warns Lesnar once. Lensar better get his ass out of Roman’s suite in the Barclays Center before Roman arrives, or he’ll bust that head open again. Will the Beast do as he’s told?

 

Ronda Rousey is here!

The Baddest Woman on the Planet is back, even after getting body slammed by Charlotte Flair through the announce table. What will Rowdy Ronda have to say to the SmackDown Women’s Champion this time? We find out, after the break.

SmackDown returns and after a recap of last week, Ronda gets the mic to speak. “Y’know what, Charlotte? Just for that, I’m not gonna take your title. No, next weekend on WrestleMania Saturday, when you tap out, you’re gonna give it to me. And then you can call me your new SmackDown Women’s Champion. SmackDown Women’s Champion? Why do we even have to say ‘women’ in there? You can call me your new SmackDown Champion!” And Ronda won’t wait on Charlotte. Leave the hells and excuses backstage to get your Barbie ass out here! Ronda waits, but Charlotte responds on the titantron.

“That was a great speech. Loved the visuals. But did you actually think I was gonna be in Brooklyn tonight? Did you actually think I was going to step foot in that low rent city before WrestleMania? I don’t know who you think you are, but I don’t answer when you call. You’re the contender, I’m the champion.” Ronda says she knows exactly who she is. She’s THE Ronda Rousey. But Charlotte doesn’t. Ronda broke her first arm at 14 years old, and was so proud, she kept count. Until she just lost count. Ooooh~, Charlotte’s shaking in her boots. She actually ran out of way sot hurt Ronda. She’d have to throw Ronda off the bridge to get any kind of satisfaction. But Charlotte will just have to wait until next week.

Ronda says that’s cute. Charlotte must think she’s the Ronda of WWE, huh? But she’s not, and here’s why. If Charlotte beats Ronda, it will hands down be the biggest win of Charlotte’s career. As for when Ronda beats Charlotte at her own game, it’ll just be another lost count. The Baddest Woman leaves it at that mic drop, but will she be able to drop the Queen once and for all?

 

Kayla Braxton interviews Lesnar backstage again.

He’s still in Roman’s suite, and he allows her to sit on the couch. Would she like some grapes? No, that’s fine.  Maybe some of that cheap champagne? No. She asks if Brock is going to leave. Why? He’s having so much fun! In fact, Lesnar suggests Kayla find Roman and tell him to get her asap. Lesnar’s running out of things to smash. He throws a lamp at the wall! Will the Head of the Table hurry before Lesnar starts smashing the room itself?

 

Championship Contenders Match: Ricochet VS Angel Garza w/ Humberto Carrillo!

The One and Only wants to be a fighting champion, and this is a chance for a Lethal Lover to get their title shot. Humberto & Angel give a young lady the Los Lotharios Kiss Cam spotlight, but will Garza get himself a golden ticket to WrestleMania?

SmackDown returns and the match begins. Garza throws his tearaway pants at Ricochet but Ricochet dodges to fire off haymakers and CHOPS! Garza puts Ricochet in the corner, CHOPS, but Ricochet hits back! They brawl, Garza fires off more shots, then he puts Ricochet in the corner. The ref counts but Garza uppercuts Ricochet! Ricochet BOOTS back, goes up, but Garza YANKS Ricochet down! Ricochet hits buckles, rolls away but Garza drags him back to SLAM the leg down, then SLAM Ricochet’s head down! Garza throws down fists, stalks Ricochet to ropes, and then chokes him on the ropes!

Garza grinds Ricochet against the ropes, lets off to put him in a corner, and then UPPERCUT again! Garza covers with a smug smirk, TWO! Garza clamps on with a headlock and he grinds Ricochet down. Ricochet fight sup, but Garza throws him into a corner! Ricochet BOOTS Garza, but Garza rolls back, only for Ricochet to SHOTGUN dropkick him tot he corner! Ricochet runs in, shoulders in the corner and bumps Garza off buckles, tot hen KICK the buckle! Garza staggers, Ricochet springboards to FLYING LARIAT! Fans fire up and Ricochet goes up the corner, only for Carrillo to rush in! Ricochet jumps away, but into a roll-up! GARZA WINS!

Winner: Angel Garza, by pinfall (NEW #1 Contender to the Intercontinental Championship)

Ricochet wants everyone to hold on. He says it won’t go like that tonight. Good to see the cousins stick together like that, that’s cool. But Ricochet will break up the family reunion. It won’t happen at his expense. So Carrillo, you come on in here and you get in the ring to take the L Garza was gonna get. Definitely a fighting champion, but will Ricochet tire himself out going twice in a row?

Championship Contenders Match: Ricochet VS Humberto Carrillo w/ Angel Garza!

The bell rings, Ricochet kicks Carrillo and fires off! Carrillo throws body shots and haymakers, then wrenches to CLUB the arm. Carrillo whips, Ricochet rolls off the back, then rolls under to handspring headscissor! Fans fire up and Ricochet dropkicks Carrillo out of the ring! Ricochet wants Carrillo to get back in already and fans boo. Carrillo tells them to shut up and he takes his time getting back in. Ricochet CHOPS, Carrillo hits back with haymakers and kicks, but runs into another dropkick! Carrillo bails out again so Ricochet FLIES! Direct hit at the ramp! Ricochet is back on top as SmackDown goes to break!

SmackDown returns again and Carrillo has a chinlock. Ricochet fights up, throws body shots, then whips. Carrillo reverses, runs in at the corner but is put on the ropes! GAMANGIRI! Carrillo wobbles, Ricochet goes up, FLYING  SUPER STEINER! Garza coaches up Carrillo while he and Ricochet are both down. Ricochet and Carrillo are in opposite corners, fans rally as Ricochet runs corner to corner to forearm smash! Then whip the other way for an uppercut! Another whip corner to corner, another uppercut! Ricochet keeps moving, QUEBRADA! Fans fire up with Ricochet as he aims from a corner.

Ricochet brings the kneepad down, but now Garza distracts! ricochet DECKS Garza, Carrillo rolls Ricochet! TWO, and Ricochet hits a NORTHERN LIGHTS! Roll through, to BRAINBUSTER! Cover, TWO!! Carrillo survives but Ricochet keeps cool. Ricochet goes to the corner, climbs up as fans fire up, but Garza drags Carrillo out of the ring! Ricochet says aight, and he SUPER CROSSBODIES! Down goes Garza as he saves Carrillo! Carrillo runs in, but into a TORNADO DDT! Both men are down as the ring count climbs! We’re past 5 of 10, Ricochet drags Carrillo up at 7 and puts in him in. Garza anchors Ricochet’s foot! Carrillo wins!!

Winner: Humberto Carrillo, by count-out (NEW #1 Contender to the Intercontinental Championship)

Garza pops out the other side, celebrating as if Carrillo did that all by himself! But wait, if both Los Lotharios have a win over the champ, who is going for gold?

 

Backstage interview with Sami Zayn.

Megan brings up the Anything Goes match with Johnny Knoxville, and The Great Liberator says, “Anything Goes. You love to hear it.” There is only one thig blowing Sami’s mind is the way people are talking like Knoxville stands a chance now! If this was a normal match, Knoxville still wouldn’t stand a chance. But Anything Goes? Are you kidding? “The man has no idea what he’s in store for. I can do anything I want out there.” If Sami wants to tap dance on Knoxville’s face while sipping a cappuccino, he could! Anything goes!

And yes, Knoxville might have his pranks and his jokes that work on his braindead Jackass buddies, but this is the Master Strategist. He’s always two steps ahead and has had nothing but time. Knoxville has done nothing but get under Sami’s skin, and yet Sami has come up with all these ways that he can hurt him! And Sami promises that’ll happen. He promises Megan, us, and Knoxville, that at WrestleMania, Anything Goes, Knoxville will experience punishment in a way that has never, ever, EVER been seen in a WWE ring before. Will Sami prove who the real Jackass is on the most stupendous

 

Austin Theory smacks Pat McAfee outta nowhere!

McAfee immediately gives chase! Theory runs for his life, to Mr. McMahon’s office. Of course the “rat bastard” runs to “daddy.” McAfee shouts at the door, but will he convince Vince that Theory is the instigator who deserves to be punished?

 

Triple H officially retires from in-ring competition!

The Game has called it Game Over after 27 years as a superstar. He helped hundreds of others get into this business, so surely we all can say, #ThankYouHHH.

 

Fatal 4 Way: Sasha Banks w/ Naomi VS Rhea Ripley w/ Liv Morgan VS Shayna Baszler w/ Natalya VS Queen Zelina Vega w/ Carmella!

Before the Fatal 4 Way Tag at WrestleMania, and even the 8 Woman Tag on Raw this Monday, we get one half of each team battling for those belts right here in Brooklyn! Will the Boss, the Nightmare, the Queen of Spades or one half of the WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions take all the momentum going into the homestretch?

SmackDown returns and the Queens have all made their entrances, not just the Queen of the Ring. That leaves #Liv4Brutality for last but not least! The bell rings and each woman has a corner. Rhea rushes Vega but she bails right out! So Rhea and Sasha both go after Shayna! Natty helps Shayna get away, so Boss and Nightmare circle. Sasha points to the WrestleMania sign, but Rhea shrugs that off. They tie up. Rhea throws Sasha around and whips her, but Sasha ducks and redirects. Things keep going, Rhea hurdles but Sasha leaps to SLAP! Sasha knuckle locks, goes up and up and flying arm-drags!

Rhea ends up in a corner, Shayna returns but is added to the pile! Sasha METEORAS them both, then snapmares Shayna. Rhea shoves Sasha, Sasha comes back to wheelbarrow, and BULLDOG! Cover, TWO! Sasha runs but Vega trips her up and drags her out to throw into the desk! Naomi goes after Vega but Mella is after her, as is Natty! Mella gets in, but so does Liv! They brawl, Vega and Rhea brawl, then Shayna and Natty join in, as do Naomi and Sasha! It’s like the tag match is happening now! The ref tries to restore order while SmackDown goes to break!

SmackDown returns and it would seem the tag partners have all been EJECTED! Meanwhile, Rhea has Sasha’s legs for a PRISM TRAP! Sasha endures, Shayna runs in to KNEE her down! Rhea dodges Shayna, HEADBUTTS her, then sees Vega getting in. Rhea scoops but Vega tilt-o-whirl headscissors! Cover, TWO! So Vega hurries to cover Shayna, TWO! Vega hurries to cover Sasha, TWO! The Queen of the Ring throws a fit, but Shayna and Sasha are in opposite corners. Vega runs in to METEORA Shayna! And then METEORA for no one as Sasha dodges! Sasha drags Vega down, CROSSFACE!!

Vega endures, Shayna gets back in, to block the tap! And BEND Vega’s arm!! Shayna wants to snipe the tap out but Sasha traps Vega’s other arm! Sasha then drags Shayna into the CROSSFACE! A DOUBLE BACK STATEMENT! But Rhea DROPKICKS it all apart! Rhea slaps some sense into herself and fires herself back up! She drags Shayna up, reels her in, pump handle and- NO! Shayna slips out, for the KIRAFUDA KLUTCH! But Sasha DOUBLE BACKSTABBERS! Shayna flounders away before Sasha can get her, and Vega hops on to CODE RED Sasha! Cover, TWO!! Shayna drags Vega out hard!

Sasha is all alone in the ring, but Rhea drags herself back up. Vega throws forearms on Shayna but Shayna hits back. Rhea goes to the apron to CANNONBALL Shayna! Vega avoided disaster to FLYING RANA Rhea into barriers! Vega goes back for Sasha as Brooklyn boos. Vega gloats a bit too much, Sasha drags her back down! BANK STATEMENT CROSSFACE!!! Vega taps, Sasha wins!!

Winner: Sasha Banks, by submission

And it’s BOOS TIME in the Barclays! Naomi returns to celebrate with her teammate, will Team BAD get those belts off Vega & Mella?

 

Roman Reigns arrives!

His car pulls in, Heyman opens the door while keeping an eye out for Lesnar, and then Heyman says he doesn’t feel so well. Roman says they’ll be fine. “But Brock won’t be.” Will Universal and World Champions clash this close to the biggest match in WrestleMania history?

 

WWE breaks ground for the National Medal of Honor Museum.

Stephanie McMahon, The Undertaker and Michelle McCool joined former President George W. Bush in sticking the first shovels in the dirt that will build this monument to those who bravely fought for America’s freedoms.

 

The Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal returns!

To honor the late legend, Apollo Crews, Commander Azeez, The Viking Raiders, the Hurt Business, Mad Cap Moss, Akira Tozawa, Drew Gulak, Reggie, Jinder Mahal, Shanky, Robert Roode, R-Truth, Mansoor, Damian Preist and even WWE United States Champion, Finn Balor, are going to battle it out! The last man left will have his name etched onto the plaque and go down in history!

But that’s not all!

With both members of Los Lotharios having earned title opportunities tonight, Ricochet said why wait? He’ll take them BOTH on in a Triple Threat! Will the One and Only be able to defeat both Lethal Lovers and stay WWE Intercontinental Champion?

 

The Most Stupendous WrestleMania card is sorted out!

On Saturday, it will be: McIntyre VS Corbin; the Raw Women’s Championship, Becky Lynch VS Bianca Belair; the SmackDown Women’s Championship, Charlotte Flair VS Ronda Rousey; and The KO Show with STONE COLD! Will we see a Scottish Warrior slay a hyena? Will both women’s champions stand tall or fall to powerful challengers? And will Kevin Owens be on the one on the other end of a Stunner?

On Sunday, it will be: the grudge match of McAfee VS Theory; the dream match of Edge VS AJ Styles; Anything Goes, Sami Zayn VS Johnny Knoxville; Raw Tag Team Championship Triple Threat, RKBRO VS The Street Profits VS The Alpha Academy; and the Biggest Match of All-Time, Winner Takes All, Championship Unification, World Champion Brock Lesnar VS Universal Champion Roman Reigns! And speaking of…

 

Roman Reigns heads to the ring!

He raises the Universal Championship for the pyro, then continues on his way as Special Counsel Heyman holds up the belt. They get in the ring, Roman hears Brooklyn cheer and jeer, and then Heyman hands him the mic. “Brooklyyyn! ACKNOWLEDGE ME!” Brooklyn is still torn, and then Roman continues. “Wise Man.” “Yes, My Tribal Chief?” “Is Brock still in my locker room?” “I don’t know where he is except I know that he’s here in Brooklyn at the same time you are, My Tribal Chief.” Heyman is panicking, he’s afraid. Roman tells him not to be afraid. It is only a bad thing for Brock.

Cuz if Brock is still in the locker room, Roman will go back there and personally put Brock’s head through the wall. But speaking of which, the cameras are live in the suite, and there’s no Beast to be found! Roman isn’t happy about all the broken and spilt items strewn around the suite, but Heyman worries about where Brock went. Fans chant for “SUPLEX CITY!” and that upsets Roman. “I told you idiots before, this ain’t Suplex City! This is the Island of Relevancy!” And it doesn’t look like Brock’s in the room so where is he now? Brock has another camera follow him, and Brock has a PICKAXE!

Brock SMASHES the windows on Roman’s new rental! Roman says he has four Suburbans, this is small money. Wise Man, Roman was right. Lesnar is scared of him! He’s an idiot! Ain’t no weapons allowed at WrestleMania, dummy. Lesnar knows that. So he bangs on the hood with the pickaxe, then chucks the pickaxe at the car. Lesnar storms his way to gorilla position! Roman and Heyman both start to worry now, it’s time to see who is scared of who! Roman’s face starts to give it away! Brock comes through the crowd from behind Roman! Lesnar’s on the desk! Heyman spots him and freaks out! Roman sees Lesnar and Lesnar grins ear to ear.

Lesnar then hops down, grabs a chair, and security rushes to stay between him and Roman! Roman laughs, and he tells fans to quiet down. Lesnar holds up the chair, Roman says he ain’t gonna do nothing. Lesnar jumps into the security and fires off with the chair! Lesnar just cleared out six men, but the Usos are here to help Roman get away! The Bloodlines run away again! They the ones… afraid of Lesnar! Lesnar goes out, SMACKS another security goober, and holds up the bent chair in victory! Fans fire up and Lesnar goes back to grab a new chair! He SMACKS the other guards! He even threatens Michael Cole!

Lesnar gets on the desk, title and chair both raised high! Roman talks to Lesnar from gorilla, “Hey, Brock! At WrestleMania, you ACKNOWLEDGE ME as the Undisputed WWE Universal Champion!” Roman’s music plays, but we can see it’s The Beast standing tall tonight. Will Lesnar change Roman’s plans by becoming the REIGNING! DEFENDING! UNDISPUTED! WWE Heavyweight Champion of the World?!


My Thoughts:

A really good SmackDown here, but I do have to point out there were some miscues. I glossed over them in Play By Play, but the ring announcer and graphics team were in disarray with that Ricochet and Los Lotharios stuff. I suppose part of the confusion was that they were going to go back to back, Ricochet VS Garza and Ricochet VS Carrillo, but they gotta make sure they know the order before ever going out there. But with Ricochet ending up in a double header, I figured right away that he’d owe both guys and they’d end up in a Triple Threat. For WrestleMania being the most stupendous, not having an Intercontinental Championship on the card is disappointing.

For that matter, a little sad yet totally expected that the Andre the Giant Battle Royal is again on TV. Furthermore, Finn is in it so it just adds to how Vince has seemingly given up on him. Sure he has the US title, but he has been the heat builder for Theory. He and Priest should’ve just already had a US title match on the card, but it seems like Priest will win the battle royal, get a US title match through it, and then lose that. Also, is the SmackDown Tag Team title match on Saturday? It wasn’t in that last roll call and I can’t remember what they said during the segment with Usos, Nakamura and Boogs. Nakamura VS Jimmy was a really good match, but Nakamura winning makes me think Usos find a way to retain.

Oh, another miscue happened with the New Day and Team Sheamus segment. They let it slip that Woods was with Kofi already, not that Kofi let it affect his announcing Woods’ return for himself. Hell, it completely threw Michael Cole off and it’s like he spaced out on the match swerve. But also, Woods won quick so they’re taking it easy until it’s time for Woods & Kofi VS I would assume Ridge & “Butch.” We got a good interview promo from McIntyre, and a good combination of vignette and promo from Corbin and Moss. It just feels more and more likely McIntyre wins, and hopefully, we’re getting Moss and Corbin breaking up. Moss’ jokes are coming at Corbin’s expense and Corbin isn’t the kind of guy to take that lightly.

Sami had a good promo to hype up Anything Goes, and I really do hope he decides to go somewhat goofy with it to match the Jackass tone. Theory smacking McAfee then running away was a decent segment, and it makes sense Theory would have that sort of spoiled brat attitude where he knows Vince won’t get mad at him, even when he does stuff like this. If anything, Vince is encouraging it. Meanwhile, the Ronda and Charlotte segments continue to be a bit rough because, well, Ronda speaks. She was of course given that promo to recite, but her pacing through it was awful. But that probably won’t affect Ronda’s chances of winning, which are still pretty good.

At least they’re letting the Women’s Tag Division finally look good. Great, even, with this Fatal 4 Way. It doesn’t make up for the disappointingly short matches that led to this, but this is a good sign that the 8 Woman on Monday and the Tag Fatal 4 Way at WrestleMania will be great matches. Still hoping we get new tag champions, but with Naomi & Sasha getting momentum here, hard to know if it’ll be them. And of course, we got great stuff from Lesnar, Roman and Heyman tonight. Lesnar gets to smash more stuff, which he definitely enjoys, and he also gets to beat up security guard jobbers, another thing he seems to enjoy. Roman kinda tips his hand on what he wants to name the unified title, and probably what it’ll become. Lesnar’s having fun but I don’t see him winning in the end.

My Score: 8.3/10

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Results

Mitchell’s WWE Evolve Results & Report! (4/29/26)

Who defies the odds?

Published

on

Will the numbers spell disaster for The Dime Piece?

Being a fighting champion, Aaron Rourke is putting his WWE Evolve Championship on the line against Harlem Lewis AND Braxton Cole in a Triple Threat!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Kali Armstrong VS Tyra Mae Steele; Kali wins.
  • Romeo Moreno VS “Starboy” Chazz Hall; No Contest.
  • Masyn Holiday & Layla Diggs VS Anya Rune & Gianna Capri; Masyn & Layla win.
  • WWE Evolve Championship Triple Threat: Aaron Rourke VS Harlem Lewis VS Braxton Cole; Rourke wins and retains the title.

PLAY BY PLAY

Harlem Lewis speaks.

“I’ve waited months for this. I returned from LFG with one goal in my mind, and that was becoming the WWE Evolve Champion. Jackson Drake and Aaron Rourke, they took their sweet time in calling my name as their opponent, but the opportunity to claim a title has finally arrived. And it didn’t come how I wanted to, one-on-one with the champ. But nothing will stop me from dropping Aaron and dropping Country Club Braxton Cole in my path to reaching the mountaintop. Tonight is my moment.

“And how poetic. On a night where the first-ever Women’s Champion, Kali Armstrong, a woman who cemented a division, a woman who built a brand, exits… I enter, and I pick up that mantel of being a dominant and destructive champion. Kali carved her path to NXT, and tonight, I take the next step in mine.” The Long Island Jackhammer is ready to break through, but will he strike gold?

 

Kali Armstrong VS Tyra Mae Steele!

This may not be for a title, but this is still The Difference Maker’s Final Evolution! Win, lose, or draw, she goes full-time on NXT after tonight. So will there be one last Kali Connection in the purple brand? Or will Evolve now belong to Miss America?

The bell rings and the two circle. The fans cheer as they feel things out, then tie up. Tyra avoids Kali’s wrench and the two reset. They tie up again, and then Kali avoids the wrench. They go again, Tyra blocks the takedown to waistlock, but Kali avoids the bridging cover. They switch back and forth, again and again, then Tyra flips Kali over for a cover, TWO! The fans cheer this technical exchange between rivals. They tie up, Kali wrenches but Tyra chinbars. Tyra slips through to have the headlock, but Kali wrenches free to headlock back. Tyra powers up and out but Kali RUNS her over! Kali gets her groove on, then runs the ropes.

Tyra drops down, hurdles over, but Kali blocks hip toss to HIP TOSS! The fans fire up as Kali then DROPKICKS! Kali headlocks for the takeover! Tyra fights around, chibars Kali into the headscissors, and the fans rally up. Kali kips free, but Tyra reels her right back in! The fans cheer as Kali kips free again, only for Tyra to reel her right back in! Kali kips free and then turns to headlock Tyra. The fans rally as Tyra fights around. Kali grinds the headlock but Tyra still stands up. Tyra RAMS Kali into a corner, then whips, but Kali reverses. Tyra goes up and HIP ATTACKS Kali down! The fans cheer as Tyra then waistlocks and SLAMS Kali!

Tyra rolls to a bridging cover, ONE! Tyra holds onto Kali for another SLAM, and another roll to the cover, ONE! Kali pries at the waistlock but Tyra drags her up again. Kali fires elbows, then whips, but Tyra reverses. Now Kali goes up an dover, and she JABS! JABS! And JABS! Kali breaks it down, then winds it up, for the HAYMAKER! Kali storms up on the corner, whips corner to corner, but Tyra goes up. Kali stops the hips this time, and THROWS Tyra out to the floor! The fans fire up as Kali then builds speed, but Tyra blocks the baseball slide! Tyra HOTSHOTS Kali with the bottom rope, then KNEE DROPS Kali’s legs!

Tyra bends Kali’s foot against the apron’s edge! Kali endures, but Tyra SLAMS the leg as she lets off. Tyra mocks the pain while Evolve goes to break.

Evolve returns and Kali fires body shots on Tyra as she fights up. Kali hobbles but she still throws hands. Kali whips, but Tyra reverses and GUT WRENCH PLEXES! Tyra then GUT WRENCH PLEXES again! Kali writhes but Tyra stalks her to the ropes. Tyra snapmares Kali into the ropes, jamming up the bad leg! The fans are torn, and so could Kali’s knee! The ref checks Kali and she insists she can continue, so Tyra grabs that leg to KNEE DROP it! Tyra digs her knee into the leg, then DROPS a knee on it! The fans rally for Kali but Tyra keeps on the leg with a toehold. Kali endures, kicks and flails, and the fans cheer her on!

Kali kicks at Tyra, but Tyra steps over, only for Kali to BOOT her out of the ring! The fans rally as Kali rises, but Tyra is right back to GUT WRENCH PLEX! But Kali lands out! Kali CLOBBERS Tyra again and again, then drop steps to SPINEBUSTER! High stack, TWO! Tyra survives but the fans rally behind Kali. Tyra and Kali go to corners, Kali runs up and RAMS into Tyra! Kali hobbles but she scoops, only for Tyra to slips free! Tyra waistlocks, Kali fights the lift, and Kali ELBOWS free! Kali whips, scoops, but Tyra makes it a cradle! TWO!! Kali escapes, but Tyra has the ANKLE LOCK!! The fans rally as hard as they can as Kali reaches out!

Kali turns over, kicks free, but Tyra BACKDROPS, only for Kali to sunset flip! TWO!! ANKLE LOCK!! Tyra keeps on that bad leg, but Kali fights her way forward, only for Tyra to drag her back! Kali turns over, victory roll, TWO! Tyra reels Kali in, OLYMPIC- NO, Kali slips free, pushes Tyra, and POWERSLAMS! Kali fires up, fights through the pain, and she builds up the speed! KALI CONNECTION!! Cover, Kali wins!

Winner: Kali Armstrong, by pinfall

Even with a bad leg, Kali runs her race and crosses the finish line! Kali gets a mic, and while the fans chant, “Thank You, Kali!” she shouts, “OH YEAH~!” Kali says it’s been real. Kali Armstrong was born in Evolve. She showed everybody that The Difference Maker ain’t one to play with. She carried this brand on her back all this time, even when the division was trying to figure out who was gonna step up and be the next stop star. Kali made history! Kali will forever go down as the inaugural WWE Evolve Women’s Champion! Ain’t nobody can take that from Kali! Kali built Evolve! But now, she has to let others live in it.

Kali is on her way to NXT to make history up there! The fans cheer that! Kali wants us to know, all gas, no brakes ’til she gets hers! #StraightLikeThat! The fans cheer Kali as she graduates from Wednesdays to Tuesdays. Will Kali soon get gold on the silver ‘n’ black just like she did here on the silver ‘n’ purple?

 

It’s Gal speaks.

“Everyone always says, ‘Hey, It’s Gal!’ But no one ever says, ‘Hey, It’s Gal, how are you?‘ They think I’m just a mint condition, ferocious, big red machine, but this machine has feelings, too. Since day one in Evolve, It’s Gal has stood out. It’s hard not to with bowling ball delts and a luminous tan brighter than the sun. But standing out is a lonely game. Sometimes, It’s Gal just wants to fit in. It’s Gal has lost pump partners, been laughed at by Team PC, ignored by Team ID, got beat up by 2.0, disrespected, disregarded, disobeyed. Even the new boss doesn’t understand It’s Gal. Are they the dummies? Or is It’s Gal the dummy?

“It’s Gal’s emotion muscle is hurting. It’s Gal would rather turn vegan than keep feeling feelings. Where does It’s Gal go from here? I mean, c’mon, It’s Gal! It’s time to peak like no stud has peaked before! Let’s find a way.” To think, underneath all that muscle and bravado, there’s a heart. But will It’s Gal have what it takes to walk down that long road of self-improvement?

 

Romeo Moreno VS “Starboy” Chazz Hall!

The Modern Artist is looking to create masterpieces both in and out of the ring, but he’s got a long road ahead of him before he is the maestro of Evolve. Will this canvas still become a work of art? Or will Starboy shine as he rebounds from his title match loss?

But wait, Max Abrams makes his way out here? Main Main Energy isn’t alone, either, as “WWE ID 2.0” follows him. The fans boo as Max leads Santi Rivera, Jacari Ball & CJ Valor to ringside, and then into the ring. Max says, “Hey, Star Man! We respect your game. Some might even say, he mogs a little bit, right? Sunglasses off, why don’t you make the best decision of your life and you join the ID 2.0 squad?” The fans boo, but Max hands the mic to Chazz. Chazz says alright, listen, he’s real proud to be part of the new WWE ID crew here, but uh… He’s not feeling this, sorry. The fans cheer that!

Santi takes the mic from Chazz to say hey, are you saying no to rolling with us?! Max asks what “NO” is in Spanish, and Santi says it’s just no. Romeo takes the mic from Santi to tell Max that he and Starboy are gonna have their match. He knows they’re all very jacked, but he’ll say it slow so even they can understand: Adios, aka goodbye. But then Jacari CLOBBERS Romeo! The fans boo as 2.0 mugs Romeo 4v1! Starboy gets them out of the way, tells them to respect the card, but then he gets mugged 4v1! The fans boo even more, but Max says Starboy will regret this! Feed to CJ Valor’s SPINEBUSTER! More refs rush out here but clearly there won’t be a match now!

Max Abrams and his new crew sure think they run Evolve now. But what will Foreman Timothy Thatcher have to say about their bad attitudes?

 

Timothy Thatcher speaks.

Well, speaking of The Foreman, he is about to break a pencil with his bare hands before he spots the camera. “Oh, hello! Whadda we got on the docket for Evolve today? Let’s see, lots to do, lots to do, lobster stew. First up, Kali Armstrong’s been promoted to NXT. Congratulations! She’ll always be in the very first Evolve match, and she will always be known as the very first Evolve Women’s Champion. It’s very nice to see her grow on Tubi, much like the other prospects. Which brings me to… tonight’s main event for the Evolve title. But I have to wait on that because… what I have to address is the new WWE ID talents earlier today.”

But then a knock on the door, and in step two new faces. They shake Thatcher’s hand, and they know that he is the Foreman, a man who appreciates hard work, and nobody works harder than these two. When you talk about Evolve being about opportunities, then these two don’t just want it, they deserve it! Well, “deserve” has nothing to do with it, but he appreciates the passion! He’s seen them in training, they’re doing pretty good. But all this is about is the time, place, and need. And what Thatcher needs is security. That’s the job he’s got because he can’t have Max Abrams and these new ID prospects running wild and causing chaos. So these two can be the ones to sort them out.

Well, whatever it takes. They shake hands with Thatcher, he says good man. Thanks, fellows. Pen, hard hats, let’s get to work! Then will these two young studs be ready to lay down the law on behalf of The Foreman?

 

Tristan Angels speaks.

“To be the face of Evolve is to be the face of the future here in WWE. And when you hold that Evolve Championship, you control the future, and that is something that everybody wants to do: control the uncontrollable. But who here has shoulders broad enough to carry that weight? To handle that pressure? Well, the answer is simple, because there is only one. A man with a face carved out of stone, and a body forged on the cold hills of Dorset, England. A man with no holes in his game, and at the young age of 22, a man more fitting than anybody else on the Evolve roster. That man has a name, and it’s Mr. England, Tristan Angels.”

 

Masyn Holiday & Layla Diggs VS Anya Rune & Gianna Capri!

As the roster is filling up with a new crop of prospects, the day one “Evolvers” need to be on their toes! Will Masyn & Layla be able to stay afloat facing this new wave? Or will the Main Character and The Sauce be a winning combination?

The teams sort out and Layla starts against Gianna. The bell rings, but Gianna decides to tag Anya. Anya shrugs and circles with Layla. They tie up, Anya pulls hair to headlock, then she hits the takeover. Layla rolls to a cover, ONE, and Anya grinds the headlock. The fans rally for Layla as she powers up. Masyn tags in as Layla powers out, then Layla drops down so Masyn can DROPKICK! Cover, ONE! Anya ROCK Masyn, tags Gianna, and Gianna runs up, only for Masyn to HIP TOSS! Masyn wrenches and whips Gianna to the corner, then runs up to BACK BODY BLOCK! Tag to Layla, she handsprings to RAM Gianna!

Tag to Masyn before a snapmare, then Masyn runs to SEATED SENTON! Cover, TWO! Masyn headlocks, Gianna powers up and out, but Masyn hurdles. Anya says STOP, and then Gianna ROCKS Masyn! Gianna bumps Masyn off buckles, fires KNEE after KNEE, then does the splits as she digs in her boot! The ref counts but the fans cheer, and Gianna stops at 4. Gianna stomps Masyn down, covers, TWO! Gianna drags Masyn up, pie faces her, and bumps her off buckles. Tag to Anya while the fans duel. Anya runs up and UPPERCUTS! Then ROUNDHOUSE! Masyn falls, Anya winds up, basement UPPERCUT!

Anya drags Masyn back, tags Gianna, and Gianna clamps on a chinlock. The fans rally as Masyn endures and fights around. Masyn rises up, fires body shots, but Gianna pulls hair. Masyn JAWBREAKERS, and both women stagger, tags to Anya and Layla! The fans rally as Layla rallies on Anya & Gianna! ELBOW after ELBOW, then a LEG LARIAT for Gianna! SOBAT and KICK and ENZIGIRI all for Anya! The fans fire up with Layla, and she scoops to FALL AWAY SLAM! Layla kips up with a little bit of style, too! Anya runs up, but Layla handsprings to PELE! Cover, but Gianna breaks it! The fans cheer as Masyn fires off on Gianna!

Masyn THROWS Gianna out, but Gianna drags Masyn out! Gianna bumps Masyn off buckles, but Layla kicks Anya! Layla runs for the SCISSOR KICK! Cover, Layla & Masyn win!

Winners: Masyn Holiday & Layla Diggs, by pinfall

After all the grinding, working, and reworking, these two finally get back in the win column! Will things finally look up for these Renaissance Women? Meanwhile, Gianna is upset with Anya ruining this for Gianna, will these two have to do to even get started in Evolve?

 

Sit-down interview with Wendy Choo and Laynie Luck.

Chuey Martinez is with the WWE Evolve Women’s Champion and WWE ID Women’s Champion to discuss next week’s title match. They didn’t get to finish their conversation last week because Nikkita Lyons and Sloane Jacobs jumped them, so he’ll give them the chance to right here and now. Laynie, what would you like to tell Wendy? Laynie says this really is the biggest opportunity of her career, and she isn’t taking this lightly. Just like luck, the people in this business can turn on you in a business. Look at Lyons wanting what Wendy’s got. And then Sloane is going after Laynie for whatever reason.

To be real, Laynie isn’t sure what version of Wendy she’s getting, so while she is grateful, she’s not letting her guard down. Wendy, your response? She knows her past has been all over the place. Crazy? Absolutely. Questionable? Guilty as charged. But she is finally her real self, and she is not changing any time soon, especially since it brought her the title. And she meant what she said when she wanted her first challenger to be someone who walked a similar path. But to put it straight, Laynie is getting her title shot, not the title. Wendy is not going down without a fight. She’s excited to face Laynie, but the Era of Champ Choo has only just begun.

Chuey is excited for this one, too, and can’t wait for next week! Will Wednesdays still belong to Wendy? Or will Laynie not just be lucky, but hit the jackpot in Evolve?

 

Cappuccino Jones checks on Romeo Moreno and Chazz Hall.

He feels bad about what happened to them out there, we were all excited for their match. They alright, though? Romeo says no, hermano, he was feeling it tonight, he was gonna freestyle! Starboy says if they had it out, Romeo would’ve ended up starstruck. Romeo says okay, sure, and Jones says no doubt their match would’ve gone crazy. But for real, he’s already so sick of everyone thinking they can just do what they want around here. They already went through that with Vanity Project and Team PC, but they got them out of here. And now these new clowns think they are the cream of the crop? Jones has been here since day one!

Starboy says he doesn’t know that whatever Max’s problem is, they’re making all the new guys look bad. Jones says don’t worry, he knows Starboy and Romeo are cool. But here’s what they should do: get one up on Max’s crew before they get one up on them. Let’s see what we can do about a Six Man Tagski! They down? Romeo’s down, that’s speaking his language! Three words: Si Se Puedes! Starboy says oh Hall yeah! They three man handshake and Jones says he’ll talk with Foreman Thatcher to make it official. Hope to see you boys next week. Jones heads out, will it be a triple shot of espresso that gets our hearts pumping? Or will Main Man Energy start to take over?

 

WWE Evolve Championship Triple Threat: Aaron Rourke VS Harlem Lewis VS Braxton Cole!

They say all men are created equal, but The Dime Piece is facing a bigger man in the Long Island Jackhammer, and a more privileged man in the Silver Spoon. But will none of that put an end to Rourke’s reign? Or will the odds say we get a new champion tonight?

We already see Kam Hendrix & Harley Riggins are in the VIP Lounge, cheering on their fellow Team PC alum. Before making his entrance, Rourke says, “Some people might be afraid of this environment, this atmosphere, but not me. Like a diamond, I’m built from pressure, and I thrive in it. When that lights are on and that camera is on, all eyes are on me, Aaron Rourke. In fact, I think it’s time I go steal the spotlight. Just like that.” Rourke snaps his fingers and says this is #ChampBusiness before he makes his way to the ring. The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and so are the stakes for this young reign!

The bell rings and everyone talks some trash, until Braxton DECKS Harlem! Rourke kicks low, Braxton body blows, then Braxton scoops and SLAMS Rourke! The fans rally as Rourke dodges Braxton, and Harlem scoop SLAMS! Rourke DROPKICKS and Braxton bails out! Rourke and Harlem stare down, then Rourke talks trash. Rourke dodges Harlem, cartwheels, but Harlem says no to Sole Food! Back suplex, but Rourke lands out! Rourke tries to fireman’s carry but Harlem fights free. Harlem shoves Rourke to ropes, Rourke tilt-o-whirls on return, then makes it a RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Rourke handsprings to KICK Braxton down!

The fans cheer as Rourke runs, SENTON onto knees! Harlem hauls Rourke up, torture racks, and RACK DROPS! Cover, TWO! Rourke is tougher than that but that still hurt. Harlem whips Rourke to a corner hard, then runs up, but has to block boots! Harlem throws Rourke but Rourke FLYING CHUCKS! Harlem falls, Rourke watches Braxton while he climbs up. But even so, Braxton SHOVES Rourke down! Rourke hotshots on his way down, but Harlem runs up! Braxton DUMPS Harlem out, then grins as he soaks up the heat while Evolve goes to break.

Evolve returns as Harlem is down on the outside while Braxton ROCKS Rourke against the ropes. The fans boo as Braxton whips and ELBOWS Rourke down. Braxton drags Rourke back up, suplexes, and X-PLEX! Cover, TWO! The fans cheer as Rourke toughs it out, but Braxton sits him up for a neck wrench. Harlem returns but Braxton BLASTS him off the apron! Braxton goes back to Rourke but Rourke fires body shots! Braxton KNEES low, cravats, and he puts on the pressure! Rourke fires more body shots, but Braxton fires more KNEES! Braxton snapmares Rourke, stomps him, then tells the fans to shut up.

Braxton stomps Rourke’s legs, then his arms. The fans boo but Braxton soaks up that heat. Braxton runs, but Harlem returns to HARLEY RACE KNEE! Rourke victory rolls Harlem, TWO! Harlem kicks, Rourke blocks, and Rourke KNEES in return! The fans rally as Rourke runs up, kicks off Braxton, but Harlem stops the DDT! Harlem suplexes and hangs Rourke out to dry! Rourke falls back to the apron but Harlem drags him up, just to YANK him into the POST! Rourke falls, but Braxton SHOVES Harlem into buckles! NECKBREAKER! Braxton rains down shots on Harlem, then snatches the bandanna away.

Braxton CHOKES Harlem on the ropes but Harlem fights back. Braxton KNEE DROPS Harlem on the back! Braxton drags Harlem up, whips him hard into a corner, then scoops to SLAM! Cover, TWO! Harlem is tougher than that but Braxton pushes him around. LEG DROP! Braxton brings Harlem up again, whips him to a corner hard, but Harlem comes back to LARIAT! The fans fire up as Harlem rises, and he dodges Braxton to shove him into a corner! BLINDSIDE LARIAT! And then a basement BOOT! Cover, TWO! Braxton survives but Harlem reels him in! Only for Rourke to DISCUS BOOT Harlem into giving Braxton a DDT!

The fans fire up as Rourke LARIATS, but Harlem stays up! Harlem swings, Rourke dodges, and he DROPKICKS the legs out! Rourke runs to BOOT Harlem down! The fans fire up again as Rourke roars! Rourke runs up to UPPERCUT Harlem, then DOUBLE KNEE Braxton! Rourke runs Around the World for a BOOT on Harlem! Braxton runs up, Rourke dodges, so the SPLASH hits Harlem! Rourke BACKSTABBERS Braxton! The fans fire up again and Rourke runs, but into an ELBOW from Harlem! Harlem goes up, but Rourke gives him some STRATUSFACTION! Harlem flounders, Braxton staggers, Rourke hits a FLYING CODE BREAKER! High stack, TWO!!

The fans are stunned as Braxton survives, but they cheer Rourke on as he rises again. Rourke goes to a corner, climbs up top, and has his pick! Wait, is that Brooks Jensen in the crowd shaking his head? Harlem hurries up after Rourke, HEADBUTTS him, then brings him up. Rourke fights the lift, but Harlem CLUBS him! Braxton CLUBS Harlem, then adds himself to this! TOWER OF DOOM!! All three men are down and the fans fire up again! The Lost Cause isn’t impressed, but Braxton hurries to get Rourke up. Braxton fireman’s carries, and spins, but Rourke cradle counters! TWO!! HEEL KICK! Braxton falls, but also falls out of the ring!

Rourke was so close, but now he turns his attention to Harlem. They both rise up, shouting this is their title! The fans fire up as Rourke fires hands with Harlem! SOBAT! Harlem throat chops, then UPPERCUTS! Harlem runs and BOOTS Rourke! Harlem runs again, but Rourke ROCKS him!! Rourke roars, the fans cheer, and Rourke kicks, but Harlem blocks! Harlem FLIPS Rourke, then deadlifts for the BOOM SLANG!!! Cover, BRAXTON DRAGS HARLEM OUT! Braxton THROWS Harlem into railing, then gives him a RAILING ATOMIC DROP!! Harlem falls over after landing on his Long Island, but Rourke DIVES!

The fans fire up as Rourke puts Braxton in, goes up top, and takes aim! MOLLY-GO-ROUND!! Cover, Rourke wins!!

Winner: Aaron Rourke, by pinfall (still WWE Evolve Champion)

Harlem may be strong and Braxton may have the Ivy League education, but it was the heart and determination of The Dime Piece that carries him through! Jensen points to Rourke, claiming his stake, but Kam & Harley are the ones creeping up! The fans boo but Rourke spots them first. Rourke is ready to fight, even after all he just did. But if the walls are closing in already, will Rourke’s reign last much longer?


My Thoughts:

A very good Evolve here, though there’s some irony to Kali Armstrong’s last match on Evolve also being Tyra Mae Steele’s last match in WWE because of the budget cuts. Tyra being let go is among the most foolish in this batch, because she is obviously a solid wrestler and was finally getting going with her on screen charisma and mic skills. Romeo VS Starboy not happening to give this “WWE ID 2.0” team some Heel heat was an interesting move, but I like the Six Man Tag we’re getting for next week. And even then, I think we’ll get an 8 Man Tag because they gotta add It’s Gal to this. It’s Gal had a brilliant vignette, that guy is going places.

Very good tag match, and I did not think Masyn & Layla were winning that just because of how they have just not been getting much. This is probably good, though, they have been needing something to stay afloat. We also probably get Anya Rune VS Gianna Capri through this because Gianna was so upset with Anya in the loss. Good promo from Wendy and Laynie to hype up their match, but I would think Wendy wins her first defense. Good promo from Thatcher, but I wish they’d given us the names of these two new guys who will be “security” for the time being. And great Triple Threat, and it was classic for the champ to retain because the challengers got in each other’s way.

But then, why give us that cliffhanger where Jensen, Kam, and Harley were closing in? WWE is in control of their own run times for Evolve, so why not give us one more minute where we at least end with the brawl/beatdown?

My Score: 8.7/10

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Results

Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 4.30.2026

Lei Ying Lee has the people’s sympathy, Allie has returned from the dead and Ali has an open challenge!

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Coming off of what was a TNA match of the year candidate, in last week’s main event…and a generally really good episode, I may be getting my hopes up. I tend to like to go into most things expecting the worst, so it’s hard to be disappointed. But TNA is starting to put competent shows together again after a few weeks of dog water.

Let’s find out if things stay interesting or if drink myself into a coma tonight.

Ratings:

  • Jeff Hardy vs Vincent: Jeff wins via Swanton Bomb – ** 3/4
  • TNA International Championship: Adam Brooks vs Mustafa Ali (c) w/Order 4: Ali retains via 450 – ***
  • Mara Sade, Rosemary & Allie vs Diamond Collective (Tessa Blanchard, Mila Moore, Victoria Crawford): Allie wins via Codebreaker – ***
  • Home Town Man vs Mr. Elegance w/Elegance Brand: Mr. E wins via Excusez Moi – t(-_-)o
  • Walk With Elijah Match: Elijah vs Frankie Kazarian: Elijah wins via 4 Corners – *** 1/4

Results:

Jeff Hardy vs Vincent

Oh no awful talking segment to open the show, we go straight into the entrances. That’s nice to see.

Jeff tosses his shirt or whatever and instantly bull rushes Vincent. A few quick strikes, a Snapmare and Jeff wants a quick Swanton, but Vinny powders. Jeff splashes Vinny, rolls him back in, and looks to continue. Jeff wants a Whisper in the Wind, but Vinny blocks that and eats the signature Jeff Hardy Mule Kick. Jeff tries for the Swanton again, but Vinny pulls him down, crotches him on the top rope and starts to dissect Jeff. A few deliberate strikes to the back, a backbreaker that Vinny holds. Jeff fights up out of it, they exchange a little, both hit the ropes and simultaneous Cross Bodies see both guys slow to stand.

Jeff is up first, Lariat, Back Elbow, Manhattan Drop, Low Dropkick. Jeff wants the Twist but his back spasms, Vinny tries a Shiranui, but Jeff stops it and finally hits the Twist of Fate, but only a near fall. Russian Leg Sweep to follow up from Jeff into that Seated Prawn Hold he likes to do, but another two count. Jeff is pulling out different things from his arsenal, including a Sit Out DDT, he’s favoring the back, so he’s not going to the Swanton. Vinny peppers in some Forearms to Jeff’s back and hits a Side Effect for two! Vinny goes to the top, implies a Swanton, but the lights go out and Matt is back in the ring in full Broken regalia. He gives the Delete, the lights go out and Jeff is on the top with a downed Vincent. Swanton Bomb from Jeff, and the crowd is hype, even if it’s pure chicanery.

TNA International Championship: Adam Brooks vs Mustafa Ali (c) w/Order 4

Simple tie up and Shoulder Tackle spot, Ali then runs Adam ragged with the rope run into a Frankensteiner for the arrogant gloating. Another cocky Back Heel Kick from Ali before Brooks hits a Big Boot, into a Cappo Kick, and a Back Body Drop sends Ali to powder. Adam tries to throw Ali back in but Ali slides across to the outside, Adam follows but gets caught and DDT’d onto the floor. Rolling Neckbreaker from Ali, and only a near fall. Adam tries a Standing Switch, but they trade switches until Ali just snaps off a DDT. Ali tries to control Adam but he gets out of it, Pele Kick. Ali uses the Bell Clap to disorient Adam, but Adam catches Ali’s next move. Some back and forth, Ali tries something, but Adam stuffs him, Cheeky Nandos, Last Ride Powerbomb into an Ushigoroshi. Adam charges the corner but Ali gets out of the way and Adam crashes in with his head bouncing off the turnbuckle. 450 from Ali, and he retains.

Mara Sade, Rosemary & Allie vs Diamond Collective (Tessa Blanchard, Mila Moore, Victoria Crawford)

Well time to see what Allie looks like after only have 2 matches in the last 3 years.

Rosemary and Vix start, Vix takes cheapshots at Mara and Allie first, Rosemary hammers her with Forearms, Exploder Suplex, and as Vix stumbles, Allie bites her! The Diamond Collective is trying to collect themselves, but Mara hits a Crossbody into the three heels. Vix finally tags out after things normalize, so Rosemary tags out to Mara. Mila and Mara go back and forth, Mara hits a sexy body wave to taunt Mila. Mila eats consecutive Dropkicks, then Mara tries a PK but Mila trips her on the apron.

Mila tags in Vix, but Mara turns it around instantly and then tags Rosemary back in. Interesting that Allie and Tessa are the ones coming in last. Vix hits her patented Northern Lights Suplex to take control and finally get Tessa in. Snapmare and Dropkick to the back of the spine from Tessa, before she tags Mila back in. Quick tags in the heel corner are keeping Rosemary in the masochist position. As the heels keep control, we slip to commercial.

We come back in time to see a Triplicate Knee Strike to Rosemary in the heel corner. Mila tags back in, but Rosemary tries to turn things around but now it’s a struggle to slow her. Allie and Tessa get the simultaneous tags and Allie comes in hot. Big Knee Lift, Running Spicolli Driver, Rosemary and Allie pull off a tandem Upside Down, Mila tries to help by tagging out Tessa while she’s in the submission, but Mara levels Mila, Rosemary Spear Mila, Allie hits the Codebreaker on Mila…and our Living Dead Girls win!

Santino sends a video message about him getting unsuspended and trying to fix some of the scummy stuff Daria did last few weeks. Indi comes out to reaffirm that she’s unsuspended too and lay claim to her eyes being on the Knockout’s Title. 

Home Town Man vs Mr. Elegance w/Elegance Brand

I again find myself rooting for Home Town Man. Yikes.

Mr E wants to pose but HTM grabs an arm and hits a few Arm Wringers. Mr E is spending more time getting away from something and posing before HTM throws him into the corner and starts stomping his chest. HTM with a long spin TKO and Mr E crawls to the ropes for safety. HTM just does 10 Count punches in the ropes. The Elegance Brand are shrieking, the crowd is behind HTM but with the 45 extra bodies, Mr E catches HTM with a Spine Buster, Shoulder Tackle, Sliding…stupid looking Splash thing, and just connects on some knees while HTM is down.

HTM hulks up, does the point, and Flip, Flop and Fly on Mr E. High Fly Home Town Flow, for only a two count! ASH starts trying to be Maria Kanellis and seduce HTM, he has her make out with his mask instead, Mr E lands his Lightning Spiral finish with a ridiculously awful pin. I…hated everything about this.

Leon Slater comes out, and I’m falling into a coma. This dude can’t talk, he has zero aura, he’s trash. All he has is flips. I need Cedric to beat the brakes off this boy. Thank GOD Cedric comes out to make this segment interesting. Cedric tells him that he might not make it to their match on the 14th, The System come out of the crowd and beat down Leon. Moose comes out for the save. Moose cleans house, Leon and Moose threaten to take out Lish too, but Eddie pulls her out in time. Weird for babyfaces to be okay with attacking the valet.

Walk With Elijah Match: Elijah vs Frankie Kazarian

So it’s a 4 Corners Strap Match. That’s it, the winner hits the buckles in succession. I haven’t seen a 4 corners match in a while. 

The match starts in the back, Kaz takes his sweet time before tying on the strap, Kaz uses a short cut with the Hand Sanitizer to the eyes and slams Elijah’s Shoulder into a door. Elijah finally turns things around with crotching Kaz on junk in the back and drops a ladder on him. Elijah puts Kaz on a manual forklift and sends him into the pile of junk. Elijah continues to bounce Kaz off the bay doors. Elijah scoops up Kaz and walks him to the ramp and kicks him down it. So now the match is closer to the finish.

Kaz tries to get away, but Elijah keeps pulling him back by the strap and into Knife Edge Chops. Elijah bounces Kaz off the ropes, Back Drop! Elijah touches two corners, but Kaz interrupts the count. A Dropkick stops Elijah and now Kaz gets to two before Elijah levels Kaz. Kaz gets thrown out, fishes under the ring and finds a guitar! While Elijah stops the guitar, Kaz uses Elijah’s over shirt to choke him. Some back and forth before Elijah bounces Kaz’s head off a turnbuckle and Kaz powders.

Elijah follows and gets the best of Kaz until Elijah is looking for a weapon but can’t find it, so Kaz starts getting in a few shots before Kaz tries to leave through the crowd. Elijah pulls him back into the barricade and lights up his chest. Kaz gets battered with a few Flying Shoulder Tackles, Walk with Elijah rope walk, into a Sunset Bomb. Corner 1, 2, 3 – but Kaz uses the strap to whip Elijah and stop him from touching the 4th buckle. A few more strap shots, Kaz throws Elijah out of the ring, but Elijah brings him with! Then he ties the strap in the post and starts lighting up Kaz’s torso with strap strikes. Kaz turns things around, but they’re trading pulling one another into the post. It’s like Tug of War, but both are losing. Back in the ring, Kaz with the Up and Over, tries the Chicken Wing, but Elijah is walking with Kaz on his back. He tags 3 corners, reaches for the fourth, but succumbs to the submission. Kaz now takes the opportunity to start his corners but Elijah starts moving so Kaz decides he’s gonna rope walk.

Kaz jumps off the ropes and Elijah connects with the Knee Lift! A few more big strap shots from both, Kaz hits a Backstabber, and tries the corners, gets to three, Elijah flips Kaz inside out and the Strap breaks! Strap choke, Highway Man’s Farewell from Elijah and at the fourth, Kaz tries to pull him, but Elijah grabs the guitar, El Kabong’s Kaz and touches the fourth corner for the win.

 

Overall Score: 6/10

While not a bad episode, the main event was super campy and an old school gimmick, not done very well. The comedy match was even bad on comedy standards, and that dragged down the rhythm of the show. Lei Ying Lee being a very believable betrayed babyface may actually have her win next week, she’s so sweet and seemingly upset, the whole Chinese Ricky Morton comparison, I still stand by. Santino and Indi being back works fine, Indi saying she wants Arianna with or without the title, is the only reason I think Lei has a real shot at winning. Indi going to her phone after the talk with Daria is 99% Dexter Lumis/Sam Shaw. Ryan being jealous of KC and Nic is good comedy, Ali and Brooks’ match was short but effective. Also Allie’s in-ring TNA return after 7 years, was really good. Allie seems to have given Rosemary a spark again and Mara being added to mix works better than expected.

So yeah, the show wasn’t bad, it just didn’t stick the landing so it made the show feel like a bigger slog than it should have. Here’s to hoping the next two weeks are exciting with the matches we know of.

 

kyle broflovski GIF by South Park

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