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Mitchell’s AEW Dynamite Results & Report! (6/15/22)

It’s a major rager!

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AEW Road Rager 2022

AEW puts pedal to the metal with Road Rager 2022!

Before AEW brings back Blood & Guts, they bring back Road Rager! And before facing off at Forbidden Door, The Maniac and the Ace are face to face!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Hair VS Hair: Chris Jericho w/ The Jericho Appreciation Society VS Ortiz w/ Eddie Kingston; Jericho wins, Ortiz has his head shaved.
  • 20v1 Handicap Elimination Match: Wardlow VS “The Plaintiffs”; Wardlow win.
  • Dax Harwood VS Will Ospreay; Ospreay wins.
  • AEW All-Atlantic Championship Qualifier: Ethan Page w/ Dan Lambert VS Miro; Miro wins and advances to The Forbidden Door.
  • Britt Baker w/ Jamie Hayter & Rebel VS Toni Storm; Storm wins.
  • AEW World Tag Team Championship Ladder Match: Jurassic Express VS The Young Bucks; The Young Bucks win and become the new AEW World Tag Team Champions.

PLAY BY PLAY

Hair VS Hair: Chris Jericho w/ The Jericho Appreciation Society VS Ortiz w/ Eddie Kingston!

The Wizard is flanked by “Red Death” Daniel Garcia, “Daddy Magic” Matthew Menard, “Cool Hand Ange” Angelo Parker, and “Rock Hard” Jake Hager while William Regal is on commentary. Will Regal revel in the “toss pot” getting his golden locks cut away? Or will Jericho take #TheIllest and make him #TheBaldest?

The moment Ortiz gets in the ring, he and Jericho throw hands! Ortiz throws headbutts, then the bell rings and Ortiz runs. Jericho CLOBBERS Ortiz, and LIONSAULTS onto knees! Ortiz gest moving and he LARAITS Jericho! Cover, TWO! Fans fire up while Jericho bails out. Ortiz goes out and fires off on Jericho. Ortiz BITES Jericho’s forehead, then CHOPS him! The JAS move aside as Ortiz whips Jericho into railing! Jericho ends up taking a seat, and fans fire up with Eddie as he coaches Ortiz on. Ortiz BITES Jericho, but stops as the ref reprimands. Ortiz sits Jericho in the barber’s chair and rains down fists! Fans count along, Ortiz gets all 10!

Jericho flops out of the chair and Ortiz drags Jericho up and into the ring. Jericho gets to a corner but Ortiz CHOPS him. Ortiz whips corner to corner, Jericho goes up and over, but Ortiz goes up and over in return. Ortiz SHOTGUNS Jericho down, covers, TWO! Ortiz BITES Jericho again! Fans cheer as Ortiz drags Jericho up. Jericho rakes the eyes and fans boo. Eddie coaches “Monkey” on, but Jericho throws hands. Ortiz headbutts! Jericho rakes Ortiz’s eyes, hoists him up top, and CHOPS! Ortiz wobbles, Jericho climbs up, and Jericho hits a- NOPE! The rana was blocked and turned into a POWERBOMB!

Ortiz puts Jericho in a drop zone, goes up, PLANKING SPLASH! Cover, TWO! Jericho bails out, Ortiz runs, but Jericho DECKS Ortiz before he can dive! Jericho brings Ortiz up on the apron, throws knees, then SUPLEXES ORTIZ TO THE FLOOR! The ref checks on both men while AEW goes picture in picture.

Ortiz and Jericho writhe, but Jericho is up first and in the ring. Eddie coaches Ortiz to get up and he rises, but Jericho shows off his hair as if to say he’s won already. Ortiz gets in, Jericho brings him up and reels him in for a BIG back suplex. Jericho has the cocky cover, TWO! Jericho flips off the haters and then makes like he can’t hear them. But Ortiz throws body shots! Jericho brings Ortiz up but Ortiz keeps throwing hands! Ortiz runs, but into a dropkick! Cover, TWO! Jericho is annoyed and he slaps Ortiz around. Jericho drags Ortiz up, throws him out, and the JAS attack while Jericho distracts the ref!

The ref sees something is up but the others let off. Eddie gets a chair to run them off! Ortiz gets back in the ring, but Jericho is after him to stalling suplex! He holds Ortiz up for five before the SLAM! Jericho flexes that wizard strength and then slaps Ortiz around. Ortiz gets mad, he gets up and he gets in Jericho’s face. Jericho slaps Ortiz, Ortiz SLAPS back! So Jericho pokes Ortiz in the eyes! The ref reprimands and fans boo as Road Rager returns to single picture. Jericho soaks up the cheers and jeers, then he drags Ortiz up. Jericho slaps him around more, but Ortiz CHOPS! And forearms! And CHOPS! And forearms again!

Jericho ducks a chop but not the LARIAT! Fans fire up while both men are down. Eddie and the fans rally up, Ortiz and Jericho stand. Jericho throws forearms, then a CHOP! Ortiz tears off his shirt to CHOP and forearm on repeat! Regal likes this and so do the fans! Ortiz fires off forearms in the corner, he whips Jericho corner to corner! Jericho BOOTS back, then hurries up top. But Ortiz SLAPS Jericho first, then hits a LONDON BRIDGE! Cover, TWO!! Ortiz is frustrated, but he gets up and whips Jericho into buckles! Then he CLUBS Jericho in the back and a suplex. Jericho slips free, rolls Ortiz, and wants the Walls!

Ortiz fights the turnover and gets Jericho for a cradle! TWO!! Jericho escapes, kicks low and suplexes, but Ortiz fights it. Ortiz wrenches, body shots and DDTs! Cover, TWO! Jericho is still in this and Regal gives Ortiz tips on how to pin. Ortiz BOOTS Jericho, then works to get his back loose. Ortiz goes up and SKY TWISTERS, but Jericho dodges! CODE BREAKER! Cover, TWO!! Jericho is shocked that Ortiz survives but St. Louis is fired up! Jericho drags Ortiz up, but Ortiz backslides him! TWO! Jericho stands up, into Ortiz’s RAN- NO! WALLS OF JERICHO! Fans are thunderous as Ortiz endures the submission!

Ortiz reaches, Eddie warns the JAS to leave the ropes alone! Ortiz crawls, reaches out, ROPEBREAK! But Parker swats at Ortiz so Eddie goes after the JAS!! They all brawl, 4 against 1! But wait, here come Wheeler Yuta and Santana! Now things are evened on the outside! Fans are fired up as the JAS are sent into railing! And then, while the ref is distracted with the chaos, Eddie gets in the ring! URAKEN FOR JERICHO!! Eddie slips away, Ortiz hurries to the cover! TWO?!? Jericho survives?! No one can believe it! Ortiz slaps sense into himself and he drags Jericho back up. Hager distracts but Eddie trips him up!

Jericho and Ortiz clinch, but FUEGO DEL SOL is here! And he CLOBBERS ORTIZ?!?! Fuego used Floyd the Baseball Bat to screw Ortiz! Jericho covers, Jericho wins!!

Winner: Chris Jericho, by pinfall (Ortiz loses his hair)

WHY, FUEGO, WHY!? Why is he siding with The Wizard?! Because it’s SAMMY! Sammy Guevara is back in the fold! Has the Jericho Appreciation Society only grown this much stronger with the Spanish God?

As for Ortiz, he must now face the consequences of this match. The barber walks over while fans chant “SAMMY SUCKS!” But Ortiz takes the clippers and scissors from the barber and lets his hair down. Eddie gets a mic while Ortiz is already cutting away his dreadlocks. Eddie tells Jericho that Ortiz is a man of his word. But guess what? This ain’t done! “Monkey, let them know!” Eddie holds the mic for Ortiz while he’s clipping, so that Ortiz can shout, “BLOOD AND GUTS! BLOOD AND GUTS! BLOOD AND GUTS!!” With two weeks left, we know who is behind the Mad King! Will the Jericho Appreciation Society survive?

 

20v1 Handicap Elimination Match: Wardlow VS “The Plaintiffs”!

For the first time perhaps anyway, the normal, everyday security guards of wrestling take a stand! They want retribution and damages paid, and they’ll settle for getting it in the ring! But will the 20 plaintiffs of this civil class action lawsuit end up on the defense against the Maestro of Mayhem?

The bell rings and Wardlow waits for someone to step up. But with 20 men, they take up the entire apron, five to a side! But when they all hesitate to get in, Wardlow goes after them! He BLASTS the ramp side, and they’re ELIMINATED! Wardlow then waits on the other 15. They all get in and swarm Wardlow! He fights, but gets crowded! He TOSSES them all away! Then he DECKS one, another tries to take him down with a leg pick, but Wardlow is just too big and strong! A third rushes in, Wardlow CLOBBERS him, then CLOBBERS a fourth! And a fifth! That guy from earlier? POWERBOMB outside the ring!!

How many are even left?! Mark Sterling is trying to figure that out as four get in the ring. The first one to rush Wardlow gets caught in a facelock, another runs in but Wardlow LARIATS him down! The guy stuck in the guillotine TAPS, so he’s ELIMINATED! And then Wardlow stands on the other for a cover, and ELIMINATES him! The rest rush in, Wardlow CLOBBERS one after another, then SPINEBUSTERS a third! And another SPINEBUSTER! He stacks four guys and covers them all, Wardlow ELIMINATES all four!! Well, just about everyone’s lost count, but one remaining guy gets in and he gets a kick, for a POWERBOMB!

Wardlow kicks and POWERBOMBS another! And then a third guy gets a POWERBOMB, too! And a FOURTH guy! Another triple stack, Wardlow ELIMINATES three! Sterling is furious, Wardlow runs over yet another man, and SPINEBUSTERS yet another! And then a POWERBOMB again! And here’s POWEBOMB NUMBER SIX!! Wardlow again stacks bodies, and ELIMINATES four! Wait, okay, the math comes in, and there’s roughly two men left? One gets in, Wardlow kicks low and gives him a POWERBOMB! The last guy gets in, he gets a POWERBOMB! Wait, there was one more, so the math was off. But the POWERBOMB is still working!

Oh, one more? Was it really only 20 guys or 25? POWERBOMB! And POWERBOMB onto the pile! Wait, there’s still one more! He leaps, Wardlow catches him, and pops him around to a POWERBOMB onto the pile!! Six stacked, six ELIMINATED! Wardlow wins!!

Winner: Wardlow (case dismissed)

Wardlow wins the case, but he wants after the lawyer! Wardlow puts Sterling in the ring but Sterling begs for mercy! Wait, Dan Lambert shouts from the cheap seats and says that Wardlow probably spends more time in the gym than he did in the classroom, so let’s make this simple. You mess with one member of American Top Team, and the rest of the team messes with him! Wardlow better watch over his shoulder, because they could be coming from the locker room, from the skybox, or even some legends in the front row right now. Matt Hughes, Tiger Woodley, take out the garbage! They do what Lambert tells them, but Wardlow gets a mic now.

“Hey, you boys are from St. Louis, right? I think as a fellow hardworking Midwesterner, I know you boys are smarter than to take orders from some rich a**hole up in the skybox.” Fans agree with that! Wardlow says they can fight if they want, but something tells Wardlow that they’re cut from the same cloth. Wardlow brings the straps down and Tiger feeds Sterling to Wardlow! Fans fire up as Wardlow gives “Smart Mark” a POWERBOMB!! Lambert and Scorpio are in disbelief, but will The Closer have to clutch that TNT Championship very closely? Or will he find #ThisIsWar?!

 

Dax Harwood VS Will Ospreay!

FTR are perhaps the greatest tag team in wrestling today as they are still dual ROH & AAA World Tag Team Champions. But the Commonwealth Kingpin is the dual Rev-Pro British Heavyweight and NEW IWGP United States Heavyweight Champion! Will Ospreay find a challenger worthy of facing him at Forbidden Door? Or will Dax the Ax show he’s already found one?

The bell rings and fans fire up already as these two stare down. Ospreay and Dax circle, fans fire up even more, and the two tie up. Ospreay arm-drags, does some push-ups to show off, but Dax keeps cool. They go again, Ospreay wrenches and wristlocks, but Dax rolls and spins to wrench and wristlock. Ospreay handsprings free right away and fans are dueling. Dax and Ospreay circle again, tie up, and Dax headlocks. Ospreay powers up and out, but Dax runs him over! Things keep moving, Ospreay hurdles but Dax is ready. Ospreay ducks and dodges to RANA! Dax is dizzy from that and fans fire up.

Ospreay drags Dax up, cranks the arm and grinds the shoulder. Dax endures, fights up and pulls hair. Dax puts Ospreay in a corner, Ospreay turns it around, but they both let off, only for Ospreay to CHOP! Ospreay tastes the sweetness, then CHOPS Dax again. Dax turns things around to CHOP right back! And CHOP again! Dax even hurt his own hand on that one. Fans fire up, Dax goes back for Ospreay and clamps onto his face. The ref counts, Dax turns Ospreay around to snap suplex! Leg drop, cover, ONE! Dax snarls, whips Ospreay to ropes and back drops him! Ospreay flops around and fans fire up. Dax covers, TWO!

Dax clamps on with a headlock and hits a takeover. Ospreay keeps his shoulders up, grabs for hair but Dax is bald. Fans rally and duel, Ospreay fights up to his feet, and he throws body shots to then JAWBREAKER free! Ospreay snarl, he whips Dax corner to corner. Ospreay runs in, but Dax throws him to the apron. Ospreay ROCKS Dax, and goes to suplex! Dax fights that to suplex, but Ospreay fights that. Ospreay throws big body shots, suplexes again but Dax slips off to be on the apron. Dax CHOPS and CHOPS and then has the cameraman move so he can APRON- NO, Ospreay slips off the suplex and trips Dax up!

Dax ends up in the apron skirt and one of his legs gets jammed up a bit. Dax gets free of the skirt but Ospreay SHOTGUNS him into the steel steps! Fans are stunned as AEW goes picture in picture.

Ospreay gets up, takes a moment to catch his breath and stretch his back before bringing Dax back up. Ospreay puts Dax in the ring, CHOPS him off his feet, then drops a knee on Dax’s head. Ospreay clamps onto Dax, and drives an elbow into his head! Dax staggers away to a corner, but he CHOPS back! Ospreay ROCKS Dax with a forearm, but Dax CHOPS! Ospreay DECKS Dax, then digs his boot into Dax at the corner. The ref counts, Ospreay lets off and taunts the fans. Dax slowly gets up, but Ospreay whips him corner to corner hard! Dax bounces off buckles, Ospreay covers, TWO! Ospreay is annoyed but he keeps after Dax.

Ospreay fishhooks Dax’s face, drags him up, but Dax throws body shots and forearms! Dax whips, Ospreay blocks the hip toss into a cobra twist! Dax endures, Ospreay stretches and thrashes him around, but Dax pries free to hip toss Ospreay down! Fans fire up while both men slowly get back up and Road Rager returns to single picture. Dax JABS, JABS, but Ospreay SOBATS! Ospreay whips, Dax reverses, Ospreay handsprings into a GERMAN SUPLEX! Dax holds on, to GERMAN SUPLEX again! And then a third GERMAN SUPLEX! Dax hits a FOURTH GERMAN, then a FIFITH! Fans fire up while both men are down again.

Fans give a standing ovation to “A E DUB!” as Dax gets himself to the corner. Dax climbs, but then Ospreay crawls. Dax hops down, goes after Ospreay, GERMAN SUPLEX! Ospreay lands high on his neck and shoulders but Dax hurries to a corner. Dax is up top, DIVING HEADBUTT FLOPS as Ospreay moves! Ospreay hurries to a corner, springboard 450 SPLASH! Cover, TWO!! Dax survives and fans say “This is Awesome!” Ospreay resets up top, but Dax ROCKS him first! Dax CHOPS Ospreay, CHOPS him again, but Ospreay throws hands! They brawl, Dax gets the edge and he CHOPS Ospreay to the apron!

Dax climbs up, he drags Ospreay up and back to the top! SUPER BACK SUPLEX CROSSBODY COUNTER! Cover, TWO and Dax cradles, TWO!! Ospreay kicks low, reels Dax in, and POWERBOMBS! But Dax rolls him through to a cover, TWO!!! Fans want them to “FIGHT FOREVER!” but this has to end somehow! Dax gets to the apron, fans give another ovation and Ospreay takes aim. Ospreay slingshots for a PLANCHA! Direct hit and down goes Dax! Ospreay puts Dax in, fans rally and duel as Ospreay climbs again. Dax is up, PIP PIP CHEERIO to the back! Cover, TWO?!? Dax survives and Ospreay snarls as he shakes his head.

Ospreay gathers power, calls his shot, but Dax reel shim in! Ospreay elbows free, tries again but Dax CLUBS him! And gets Ospreay up for a SLINGSHOT– NO, Ospreay slips out and ROUNDHOUSES! Dax wobbles, into an OS- NO! No Cutter! Electric Chair Lift, but then a spin and SLINGSHOT POWERBOMB!! Cover, TWO!!! Ospreay survives another hard fall and the fans give yet another standing ovation! A standing count starts, both men sit up and give each other Junkyard Dog headbutts! They stand up, and the forearms start flying! Fans fire up as Dax gets the edge and EuroUppers! Ospreay roars but Dax JABS! HOOK KICK!!

Ospreay whips, Dax reverses to wrench and LARIAT! Dax snarls and he throws off his elbow pads. Dax drags Ospreay up, reels him in, but Ospreay slips around to SIT-OUT POWERBOMB! Cover, TWO!! Dax survives but Ospreay just runs, OSCUTTER!! Cover, TWO?!?! Dax survives again, but Ospreay arms his special weapon! HIDDEN BLADE!!! Cover, Ospreay wins!!

Winner: Will Ospreay, by pinfall

The Ax got cut down by Ospreay’s Hidden Blade, and the rest of the United Empire, from Aussie Open to the NEW IWGP Heavyweight Tag Team Champions, Jeff Cobb & Great-O-Khan, get in the ring to get in Dax’s face. But here comes CASH! He fights off Khan and Cobb, and ROCKY ROMERO is here to get after Kyle Fletcher & Mark Davis! Trent, too! But the Empire still has numbers advantage, and are in better shape after everything that just happened. So here comes ORANGE CASSIDY! Freshly Squeezed is back at 100%, and moves as slowly as always. Ospreay stares at Cassidy as Cassidy gets in the ring.

Cassidy walks around Ospreay, and then they stare down. Cassidy has FTR and Roppongi Vice backing him up, so the Empire stands down. Is this a 10 Man Tag we’re about to see at Forbidden Door? Or will Cassidy take Ospreay on for that US Championship while everyone else fights for the tag titles?

 

AEW looks closer at Jon Moxley VS Hiroshi Tanahashi.

The Maniac says, “I’ve been big game hunting NJPW, I’ve been going after the biggest, the baddest. Naito, Nagata, Suzuki, Ishii. I’ve been going after them all. And the last one, the biggest one that I’ve been looking for for two, three years: Tanahashi.” Kevin Kelly of NJPW commentary says that Moxley called out Tanahashi for “ducking him” these three years. Tony Schiavone adds that Moxley VS Tanahashi isn’t just about the Interim AEW World Championship, this is about two guys who have been on a collision course. Good ol’ JR says that Forbidden Door comes with a lot of intrigue because AEW doesn’t have a health champion.

Moxley says there’s no more running or hiding. He is the best wrestler on the planet, he IS the Forbidden Door! But what will The Ace have to say in response? We’ll see, after the break!

 

Jon Moxley heads to the ring!

AEW’s Wild Thing enters from the crowd and St. Louis goes wild for him. But then here comes The Once in a Century Talent, Hiroshi Tanahashi! The two get face to face and fans already lose their minds over how great this is. Moxley has a mic to tell Tanahashi, “I’ve been chasing you for a long, long time, my man. And now, finally, here you are in all your glory. Hiroshi Tanahashi! I chased you across Japan on bullet trains, I chased you across the Pacific on NJPW Strong, wrestling Kenta in an empty warehouse. All that time, all that work from day one with NJPW, it’s always been about you, Tanahashi.”

Moxley says there are a lot of championships in this business, a lot of belts, titles, tournaments, but there is only one man who they call The Ace, and that’s Tanahashi! “But not for long.” Fans chant for “TANAHASHI!” but Moxley says, “The man deserves his respect, he’s an inspiration to generations, he’s an inspiration to me. They call you Ace, but not for long! Because it is a fact, it is not a catchphrase when I tell you I am the best professional wrestler on this planet. A lot of people are just pretending, I live it night in and night out!” Fans cheer in agreement with that.

Moxley continues to say, “There’s a hell of a lot more on the line at Forbidden Door on June 26th than that AEW World Championship belt. There’s a hell of a lot more on the line. Everything is on the line for me. Everything I’ve worked for for three years. Everything I have blood, sweat and tears, given them for. Everything that I tried to force myself into for three years to become, it is all on the line.” Mox knows that for Tanahashi, his busted neck, his busted knees, his health and everything he is is on the line, too, because Moxley palsy for keeps. “When the dust settles at Forbidden Door, Tanahashi-san, you are gonna call me, ‘Ace.'”

Tanahashi gets the mic but then Jericho has to interrupt! The JAS walk back out, Tay Conti now with Sammy, perhaps another new member of the group. Jericho has the music cut, and Jericho says, “Let’s be honest, Mox. The only reason that you’re standing in that ring is because I wasn’t here last week. This is my spot and you know it! And if you don’t walk away right now, instead of spiking you in the eye, maybe I’ll burn your face with a fireball! Because I’m a wizard! And Tanahashi, the last time I saw you, I had just beaten you two years ago in the main event of the Tokyo Dome!”

But then Tanahashi speaks up! “Jericho! SHUT UP!” Oh, shut up? Really? GET ‘EM, BOYS! GO! The rest of the JAS rushes out now, they’re going at the ring! But wait, not just them! LANCE ARCHER slides in from behind and he DECKS Moxley! And EL DESPERADO is here, too!? He tackles Tanahashi and Garcia helps him stomp Tanahashi out! The JAS and Suzuki-Gun are oddly working together here! Fans boo but Jericho grins as he and SamTay join all this. Jericho introduces the “newest members” of the JAS in Sammy and Tay, and now they are Los Tres Sex Gods! Hell, SamTay will have sex any time, right? They make out right now!

And then Jericho formally introduces the Murderhawk Monster, Lance Archer, and the Rogue Luchador, El Desperado. Why are they here? Because they’re on loan from Minoru Suzuki himself, who by virtue of Tony Khan, will be teaming for the first time ever with Chris Jericho at Forbidden Door! Jericho, Suzuki & Sammy VS “Mox’s little bitch boy,” Wheeler Yuta, his other NJPW Young Boy, Shota Umino- Oh, fans like him? Well don’t forget the time Jericho beat him up at the Tokyo Dome, as well as his stupid father, referee Red Shoes!

So as Jericho was saying, it is him, Suzuki & Sammy VS Yuta, Shota, and because Jericho can’t wait to get his hands on this guy again, EDDIE KINGSTON! Wait, speaking of, here comes Eddie! He leads Yuta, Santana, and a fully shaven Ortiz in retaliation for earlier! The extended Blackpool Combat Club clears the ring of JAS and Suzuki-Gun! PARADIGM SHIFT for Menard! SLINGBLADE for Desperado! And that leaves Ace and Maniac in the ring alone! Will these two tear the house down at Forbidden Door? Will Moxley bring that interim title to Blood & Guts just days after?

 

AEW hears from Darby Allin and reDRagon, Bobby Fish & Kyle O’Reilly.

The Relentless One tells Kyle O’Reilly, “you took out the one person in this company that’s like family to me.” Kyle says it sounds a little sick, but his mind just keeps going back to that sound of Sting’s ankle bone snapping, and it’s euphoric to me. Darby says he’ll do the same back to Kyle. Darby wants to break Kyle’s leg! Fish tells Darby to get his make-up done just right, get the nails done just right, and jump his stupid ass on that skateboard to bring him their way. Fish promises that Darby will not be happy with how this goes. But Darby says that this Friday on Rampage, they’ll watch Darby break Fish’s leg first. Will Darby find a way to slay the reDRagon all by himself?

 

Backstage interview with Toni Storm.

Tony Schiavone knows Storm is facing Britt Baker later on, and Storm tells “Brittney” that being a dentist means she knows things because she’s a smart woman. But Storm dropped out of school at 15 and even she isn’t stupid enough to play the games Britt plays. “We’ve all seen you. We’ve all seen what you bring to the table, Britt. But right here, this is the skillset of a champion. This is the criteria of a world champion. This is what it’s gonna be. And I’m gonna take the Women’s Division to where it should be. We’ve all seen the DMD. Oh, we’ve all seen it. But what we want to see, is Toni Storm, world champ.” Will the Lightning From Down Under strike down and shut up The Doctor once and for all?

 

AEW All-Atlantic Championship Qualifier: Ethan Page w/ Dan Lambert VS Miro!

All Ego doesn’t care about the Redeemer’s beliefs or his new mission in life. All Ego only cares about All Ego, and that brand new All-Atlantic title. Will O Canada echo through the night as Ethan steps towards the Forbidden Door? Or will everyone be shouting “GAME OVER” instead?

The bell rings and fans are fired up already, chanting for “MIRO! MIRO!” But then Ethan bails out to slow things down. Lambert says that’s smart, and he talks strategy with him. Ethan gets back up and in, fans still rally for “Let’s Go, Miro!” Miro and Ethan circle, but then Ethan bails right back out. The trolling strategy continues, but Miro gives chase! Ethan gets in, CLUBS and stomps Miro, and CLUBS and CLUBS and CLUBS him! Ethan lets off, but Miro blocks the kick. Ethan avoids the lariat to fire off KICKS to the leg, then a KICK to the arm! Ethan bumps Miro off buckles, wraps the arm around ropes and pulls!

The ref counts, Ethan lets off at 4, or maybe 4.5, and then he wrenches Miro’s bad arm to RAM shoulders. Ethan wrenches to an ELBOW BREAKER, and another! Ethan RAMS shoulders with Miro, goes for a double wristlock but fans rally and Miro holds it off. Ethan knees Miro low, but Miro reverses the whip and CLOBBERS Ethan on the return! Fans fire up but Miro’s bad arm is hurting. Miro just gets angry, and he stomps Ethan’s arm! And SLAMS it down, then stomps it again! Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth, arm for an arm! Miro drags Ethan up, steps over to hip drop on the shoulder, then he wrenches to CLUB away on Ethan’s arm!

Fans fire up as Miro gives hammer after hammer, then he POSTS Ethan! Ethan flops out to the floor but Lambert coaches him up while AEW goes picture in picture.

Miro shakes out the bad arm while Ethan slowly gets up. Miro goes out and he ROCKS Ethan! Miro then RAMS Ethan into railing! Fans fire up while Miro stalks Ethan. Miro drags Ethan up, ROCKS him with a haymaker, then brings him around to put back in the ring. Ethan hurries away to a corner, and Lambert barks at Miro. Miro just glares at Lambert, runs in at Ethan, but into a BOOT! Ethan runs, ducks and dodges and BOOTS Miro down! Miro ends up on the ropes, Ethan pretends his arm is hurting, but Lambert doesn’t try a cheap shot. Hard to say if that’s from being wise or being afraid.

Either way, Ethan CHOKES Miro on the ropes now! The ref counts, Ethan lets off, and he argues with the ref. Now Lambert gets his cheap shot in! Lambert flexes like he did something impressive, and he fist bumps Ethan. But Ethan turns around into a DROPKICK! Both men are down but Miro hurries to cover, TWO! Miro snarls, and he goes out after Lambert! Lambert scurries away, but Ethan is on the apron! Ethan leaps to FLYING SHOULDER TACKLE Miro down! Ethan gets up to shout, “I’M THE MAN!” and then give a big grin to the camera. But Miro RAMS Ethan into railing! And again!

Miro seethes as he puts Ethan in the ring. Miro storms right up to Ethan, whips him to ropes, but Ethan kicks back! Ethan runs, into a SAMOAN DROP! Road Rager returns to single picture and fans fire up for Miro. Ethan gets to the apron and Lambert tries to keep confident, but Miro drags Ethan up against the ropes. Fans fire up as Miro gives a shout out to an old friend! BEATS OF THE BULGARIAN BODHRAIN! Miro gets nine, but Ethan HOTSHOTS the arm! Miro DECKS Ethan for the tenth shot, and then hurries out after him. But Ethan RAMS Miro into steel steps! And SMACKS him off them, too! And then POUNCES him back into the steps!

Miro is down, clutching the bad shoulder. Ethan drags Miro up and into the ring, then he climbs a corner! Miro stands, Ethan leaps, FLYING SHOULDER TACKLE again! Cover, ONE!! Miro shocks Ethan, but Ethan hurries to the apron. Ethan mocks the prayers, STEP-IN CUTTER! Cover, TWO!! Miro survives and Ethan argues with the ref, but the count is the count. Fans rally up as Ethan looms over Miro. Ethan gets Miro’s arms and shouts, “I’m gonna make you pray to me!” Ethan makes Miro put his hands together and demands Miro pray to him! Miro just laughs, and he turns the wristlocks around on Ethan! Miro is furious and he HEADBUTTS, into the BELLY2BELLY!

Miro then gets Ethan up, another Belly2Belly! Fans fire up, Miro SPLASHES in the corner, then WHEEL KICKS! Fans fire up with Miro as he storms around. Lambert is freaking out as Miro aims from a corner. Lambert gets on the apron, Miro DECKS him! And then BEST KICK to Ethan! Miro is snarling as he shouts, “GAAAME~! OVEEER~!” And the GAME OVER CAMEL CLUTCH!! Ethan taps, Miro wins!

Winner: Miro, by submission (advances to Forbidden Door)

All Ego feels Miro’s wrath, and it is Miro who is redeemed! Miro joins The Bastard, Pac, in the All-Atlantic Championship Fatal 4 Way! Will it be Penta Oscuro or Malakai Black that joins them? And who from NJPW’s own mini-tournament will win that golden ticket to Chicago? We see who embarks on the New Japan Road this weekend with the first round!

 

Matt Sydal & Dante Martin speak.

Angel Dorado starts by saying, “This week on Rampage, I go one-on-one with Jon Moxley. A lot of people are looking at this as a ‘potential’ victory. Well, I am sick and tired of hearing the word, ‘potential,’ because that is all I’ve been labeled as.” The mentor, Sydal, says, “It’s not about Dante’s potential, it’s about time everybody caught up.” Dante says, “When stars like Moxley go down, it is going to be people like me who take his spot. So this Friday on Rampage, a new star is going to be born, and that star is Inhuman.” Sydal tells Moxley, meet the #Inhuman, Dante Martin.

 

Britt Baker w/ Jamie Hayter & Rebel VS Toni Storm!

It’s a rematch from the Owen Hart Foundation Women’s Tournament Semifinals, and now it’s about going after THE AEW Women’s World Championship! Will “The Queen of Harts” win this rematch to get another rematch with Thunder Rosa? Or will it finally be #ToniTime?

The bell rings and the two rush each other! Storm dodges, the forearms start flying, and it’s a scrap! Fans fire up, Storm DECKS Britt and Britt bails out! Storm chases after Britt and ROCKS her! Britt hits back and then POSTS Storm! The ring count is climbing as Hayter and Rebel creep over. The ref warns them to leave Storm alone. Hayter backs off, but Britt CLOBBERS Storm! Britt refreshes the count, fans rally and duel, and Britt puts Storm in. But then Storm trips Britt up! Storm CHOPS Britt, puts her back in, and then climbs up a corner. Britt stands, turns around, and Storm CROSSBODIES! Cover, TWO!

Storm is annoyed, especially with Rebel on the apron. Storm focuses on Britt and runs the ropes, only for Hayter to trip her up! Hayter YANKS Storm out of the ring, but here comes Thunder Rosa! La Mera Mera pushes past Rebel and gets in Hayter’s face! Hayter runs, Rosa chases her, and Britt is down a sidekick as AEW goes picture in picture!

Britt puts Storm in the ring, Storm goes to a corner, and Britt stomps away on her! The ref counts, Britt lets off and drags Storm up. Britt ROCKS Storm, runs, and SLINGBLADES! Cover, TWO! Britt wants a faster count, but then she clamps onto Storm with a seated cobra twist. Storm endures, fights up, and pulls Britt down into headbutts! Britt throws Storm down by her hair! Britt cravats for a neck wrench and she throws in knees. Storm falls over and Britt spells, “D M D” to the camera. Britt then brings Storm up and snap suplexes! Cover, TWO! Britt drags Storm up, underhooks, and BUTTERFLY SUPLEXES! Cover, TWO!

Storm gets to a corner, Britt taunts the Storm fans and then drags Storm up to throw forearms! Storm turns things around to fire off haymakers! The ref counts, Britt kicks Storm low! Britt drags Storm up and CHOKES her in the corner! The ref counts, Britt lets off, and Britt whips Storm out to send her back in! Britt stomps away on Storm, the ref counts and Britt trips Storm to dig her boots in! The ref counts again, Britt lets off, but she’s wary of Storm kicking at her from below. Road Rager returns to single picture as Britt stomps and digs her boots in again. The ref counts but Britt lets off, and Storm ends up on the apron.

Britt drags Storm back in and covers her, ROPEBREAK! Britt stands Storm up to ROCK her in the corner, then she runs in, into a wrench and TORNADO DDT! Britt bails out of the ring while Rebel freaks out, and Storm goes to the apron! ANOTHER TORNADO DDT, and to the floor! Fans fire up, Storm puts Britt back in, but she’s slow to returning. Britt gets away to Rebel but Storm GERMAN SUPLEXES her! Britt’s glove goes flying! Storm and the fans fire up, and Storm runs in at the corner to HIP ATTACK! Storm wants after Britt but Britt clings to the ropes and pushes her away. That high speed hip might’ve legit rocked Britt.

The ref checks on Britt but Storm doesn’t let off. Storm drags Britt up, throws a forearm and Britt falls to a knee. Storm wants to reel Britt in, but Britt flops back down. The ref and Storm aren’t sure what to make of this, but then Britt claws Storm’s face!! Cradle, TWO!! Britt hurries to get Storm up, FISHERMAN SCREW! Cover, TWO!! Britt’s sneaky tactics didn’t work so she gets the glove! Fans spell along, “D M D!” But Storm slips around Britt to GERMAN SUPLEX! And then the tuck, SPIKE PILEDRIVER!! Cover, Storm wins!!

Winner: Toni Storm, by pinfall

The Storm finally strikes Britt down! And Rosa returns, her AEW Women’s World Championship in hand. Rosa raises the belt, and she points at Storm with a smile. When and where will we see Thunder and Lightning clash?

 

Backstage interview with Stokely Hathaway.

Tony Schiavone is with the publicist for Jade Cargill & The Baddies, and he has “breaking news” for Rampage. “The TBS Champion has issued an open challenge, I will be making my commentary debut. Yes, I will be getting two paychecks in one night, which is why I’m the best at what I do.” But OMG, Willow Nightingale walks in and YES! Yes to what? Stokely knows why she’s here. He loves the look, loves the outfit, he remembers having an afro back in the day. Willow oughta be a Baddie! Willow is honored, but she doesn’t want to be a Baddie. Does he not remember? They worked together so many times in the past.

But it makes sense Stokely doesn’t remember. He’s so far so focused on everyone else, chasing their success, clapping for them and what they’re doing while Willow is trying to prove herself. So on Rampage, WILLOW accepts the open challenge! Well, with all due disrespect, that’s crazy as hell! But sure, see you on Friday. Will Willow prove she is championship material as the one in 33-1? Or will she just be another guest on #ThatBitchShow?

 

Hangman Page is here!

St. Louis fires up for The Cowboy and his pyro as he heads to the ring. Fans already chant for “COWBOY SH*T!” while Hangman gets a mic. Hangman says, “With Forbidden Door just around the corner, just last week, I called my shot. And I said I wanted a match with Kazuchika Okada. And I didn’t just want the match with Okada, I wanted to challenge him for his IWGP World Heavyweight Championship. And well, as a self-professed occasional dumbass, I didn’t take into account that by Forbidden Door, he may not still be champion. And lo and behold, this weekend, Okada lost that championship. Funny life. But the sentiment has not changed. And the challenge still stands! Because at Forbidden Door, there-”

But Adam Page is interrupted by Adam Cole, telling him, “Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You really are a stupid cowboy, aren’t ya?” Hangman sighs and facepalms while Cole says, “First of all, a huge congratulations to the NEW IWGP World Heavyweight Champion, my good friend, Jay White. Secondly, I don’t know why I have to keep repeating myself, but Page, you will NOT challenge for that championship at Forbidden Door. And if anyone’s gonna challenge for it, it’s gonna be me! Because Forbidden Door is not about AEW. Hell, it’s not even about NJPW. Forbidden Door is about The Undisputed Elite. Forbidden Door is about the Bullet Club.

“And the best way to showcase that event and that championship is Adam Cole BAYBAY VS Jay White. And speaking of Forbidden Door, Okada, he’s not even gonna be there! But there is someone here tonight who would love to come out and say hello.” It’s JAY WHITE HIMSELF! But not from the ramp! White sneaks in from the crowd side and he gets in the ring! BLADERUNNER for Hangman!! Cole applauds the Switchblade, and White says, “Uh-uh, uh-uh. I am Switchblade, Jay White. I am the Catalyst of Professional Wrestling. I am the IWGP, WORLD! HEAVYWEIGHT! CHAMPION!

“So Hangman, what makes you think that you call the shots? Because you couldn’t beat CM Punk? Because you lost your AEW World Championship? Oh, and hey buddy, our singles record? 2-0 to the Switchblade.” So if White’s going to put HIS title on the at Forbidden Door, it won’t be against Hangman. Cole says there it is! Undisputed Elite and Bullet Club, baby! Right? Uh, no. It won’t be Cole, either. Oh… White says he holds the prize, so he holds the power! This here means that the WORLD now breathes with the Switchblade, because this is the Switchblade Era! Cole tries to get White to reconsider, but with time running out, who will White choose from AEW over him?

 

Just made for Forbidden Door!

After the confrontation earlier tonight, Orange Cassidy WILL challenge Will Ospreay for the IWGP US Heavyweight Championship! Will Freshly Squeezed get serious and get some gold? Or will the Commonwealth Kingpin slice him up with that Hidden Blade?

And after clearing Britt Baker out of the way, Toni Storm gets her AEW Women’s World Championship match with Thunder Rosa in Chicago! Will the winds of change blow and help the Lightning From Down Under strike gold? Or will La Mera Mera ride out the storm and retain her title?

 

AEW World Tag Team Championship Ladder Match: Jurassic Express VS The Young Bucks!

Well, things being what they are, the Triple Threat is now down to 2v2. But that doesn’t change that Captain Charisma dragged Jungle Boy & Luchasaurus into this situation. Will the champions fail to bring the belts back down? Or will they be able to survive the Superkick Party in St. Louis?

The introductions are made, the belts are already raised high above, and we see who literally rises above the competition to be the best in AEW!

The bell rings and fans fire up as all four men look to the titles above them. Then Matt TACKLES JB and Luchasaurus TOSSES Nick! Luchasaurus fires off fast hands, Matt helps Nick and they mug the dino-man. They double whip but he busts the clothesline to DOUBLE LARIAT The Bucks! Luchasaurus hurries outside to fetch a ladder, but Matt WRECKS him with a dropkick! Luchasaurus hits railing and falls down, and Matt takes the ladder for his own. But JB DIVES into Matt and sends him into railing! JB hurries inside while Nick gets the ladder. Nick intercepts JB, CHOPS him, then knuckle locks and goes up the ropes to “LUCHA LIBRE~” to the ladder!

But JB stops Nick from doing anything more with a CHOP! JB goes up the ropes now, and he jumps to SUPER RANA Nick off the ladder! Fans are thunderous while Nick tumbles out, and JB hurries to position the ladder under the belts! JB climbs, but Matt gets in and yanks him down. Matt ROCKS JB, whips him to ropes, but JB ducks and goes up the ladder! Matt hurries after him, they brawl at the top, but Nick returns. JB SMACKS Matt off the ladder, but Matt gives Nick a boost to DECK JB! Nick climbs but Luchasaurus choke grips him! Luchasaurus choke grips Matt, too, while dragging Nick down!

The Bucks break free to mule kick, ROUNDHOUSE, and then take the ladder down. The Bucks coordinate, they run at Luchasaurus but he handsprings under! And BOOTS the ladder out of their hands! Luchasaurus gives JB a boost via wheelbarrow to COMPLETE SHOT Matt! Nick BOOTS Luchasaurus, puts JB on the apron, but JB ENZIGURIS and Luchasaurus scoops! JB goes up, ELBOW DROP SIDEWALK SLAM COMBO! Fans fire up, Jurassic Express set a ladder up, and they both climb. Nick and Matt drag them each down, Matt smacks JB off buckles, then helps Nick with Luchasaurus. The Bucks CLUB, shove and mule kick the legs, and Luchasaurus smacks off rungs!

The Bucks reset the ladder, putting it in a corner. Matt brings JB up, he and Nick double whip, but JB runs up the ladder, to the ropes, DOUBLE CROSSBODY! JB puts Nick outside and Nick smacks off apron! JB elbows Matt away, goes up and leaps, into a NORTHERN LIGHTS! Matt starts up the Polar Express, and he goes on to NORTHERN LIGHTS JB onto the ladder!! JB writhes and Nick goes up the ladder to TORNILLO onto Luchasaurus! Fans are thunderous again as Matt drags JB over and Nick positions a table. The Bucks bring JB up, but Luchasaurus saves JB from the double suplex! Luchasaurus DECKS Matt and JB suplexes Nick into the ring!

JB runs and gets a boost to RANA Matt off the apron and through the table!! Fans lose their minds as Matt is down in the wreckage! JB gets back in, Luchasaurus gives him another boost, but Nick turns rana into POWERBOMB off the apron and through a table!!! JB is down in wreckage and fans lose their minds all over again! Nick shoulders into Luchasaurus, slingshots up, but into a choke grip! But Nick fights free to CANADIAN DESTROYER!! Luchasaurus flops out, Nick goes out to PENALTY KICK from the apron! Nick hurries up the corner, Luchasaurus is on a table… SUPER 450 THROUGH A TABLE!!!

AEW goes picture in picture while all four men are down in table debris! The referees check them all, and somehow they’re all okay to continue! Matt hobbles up, as does Nick, and while Matt gets in the ring, Nick fetches JB. Matt sets the ladder up against ropes now, and he fetches JB. Matt sets JB on the ladder and then holds the whole thing up. Nick is climbing the corner, DRAPING SWANTON on the ladder! JB writhes but the Bucks move on to fetch even more tables! They have a huge table drop zone by the ramp, and double stack it! Matt and Nick get back in the ring, and Matt hobbles over to JB. JB kicks from below but Matt stomps him down.

Matt drags JB up, Nick runs in, SHINING WIZARD! Then BULLDOG DROPKICK COMBO! The Bucks soak up the cheers and Nick does his Macho Man. Matt then points a la the Outsiders over to the table tower they made. The Bucks drag JB up, and they double trophy lift as Road Rager returns to single picture. But JB avoids the lawn dart, dodges Nick and he fires off forearms and elbows! JB blocks Nick’s superkick to throw it into Matt! Then SUPERKICKS Nick! JB springboards to QUEBRADA INTO DOUBLE SUPERKICKS!! The Bucks hurry as Luchasaurus gets in, but he handsprings under the kicks!

Matt ducks as Luchasaurus TAIL WHIPS, and Nick takes the hit! ROUNDHOUSE for Matt, then choke grip and CHOKE SLAM! Choke grip for Nick, CHOKE SLAM onto the ladder!! The Bucks bail out, Luchasaurus goes to the apron to MOONSAULT! Direct hit on both Bucks and fans fire up! Luchasaurus gets back to his feet, brings another ladder into this, and he pushes that to center. Luchasaurus stands the ladder up, puts it under the belts, but Matt stops him from climbing. Matt jumps on for a SLEEPER, but Luchasaurus still climbs!? The refs brace the ladder, that’s nice of them. JB returns, he has a smaller ladder, and he CLUBS Matt on the back with it!

Matt drops off Luchasaurus, clipping the other ladder on the way down. JB sets up the short ladder next to the tall ladder, but Matt hurries after him. Matt and JB brawl while reaching, but Luchasaurus CHOPS Matt on the back! Nick springboards to get onto the taller ladder with Luchasaurus! There’s brawling all over, reaching up for the belt, too, and now it’s just a fight! Fans are thunderous as Luchasaurus JABS Matt, and Matt punches JB! JB CHOPS Nick! Matt SMACKS JB’s head off the top of the ladder and down he goes! Luchasaurus HEADBUTTS Nick, down he goes! Luchasaurus HEADBUTTS Matt, and now Luchasaurus is all alone!

Luchasaurus reaches out, but the Bucks grab his legs! They drag Luchasaurus down and then DOUBLE POWERBOMB Luchasaurus onto the leaning ladder!! JB returns, but Nick SUPERKICKS him! Then POISON-RANAS him down! Matt puts Luchasaurus back on a table, throws down hands, then he returns to the ring. Nick moves the one ladder aside and Matt climbs up the corner. Matt tells Luchasaurus this is it! MACHO ELBOW through the table!! Another table is wrecked, and Nick climbs up the ladder. Nick reaches out, but JB drags him back down! JB gets around, GERMAN SUPLEX!

Matt hurries back in, he and JB are both crawling for the ladders. It’s a race, but JB chose the short one. So JB drags Matt back down, only to get a shoe! Matt hurries up the rungs but JB chases him down! JB CLUBS Matt, brings him back, and GERMAN SUPLEXES! JB tries again but Nick climbs up, too. They fight near the top, Matt returns and he CLUBS JB. JB CLUBS the Bucks back, Nick then Matt and repeat. JB CHOPS and CHOPS, but Matt blocks! Matt has one arm, Nick gets the other! The Bucks climb up higher, SKYSCRAPER B T E- NO!! JB tips the ladder with a kick, and the Bucks go falling down!

The Bucks HOTSHOT off the ropes, and they stagger into the other ladder! That ladder tips and JB falls into a HOTSHOT! They’re all down, but Luchasaurus returns! Fans fire up as Luchasaurus hurries to get the taller ladder back up! Luchasaurus climbs, reaches, but the Bucks return again! They push the ladder over, and Luchasaurus fall through the table tower!!! Even the Bucks are shocked seeing that! But JB is back, and he has hold of the shorter ladder. JB CHUCKS the ladder at Nick then fires off haymakers on Matt! JB CHOPS Nick while he’s trapped between ladders, then hurries to climb! But the Bucks stop him again!

The Bucks bring JB down into a FLAPJACK, then B T E TRIGGER!! The Bucks reset the tallest ladder, and they both climb together. The Bucks bring the belts down together, they win!

Winners: The Young Bucks (NEW AEW World Tag Team Championships)

Nick and Matt, bloody and bruised, are the first-ever TWO-TIME AEW World Tag Team Champions!! Christian Cage checks on his guys, perhaps feeling responsible for this loss. Will Jurassic Express be able to get back on track after being derailed like this? Will the Bucks look to make this reign bigger and better than the first?

Christian gets in the ring and checks on JB now. JB is up, but he needs Christian and Doc Samson to help him to the ropes. But then Christian pulls JB into a KILLSWITCH!!!! Christian shouts something at JB while the fans lose their minds! Christian then goes out of the ring and under the to bring out chairs! Christian swings at the refs and they back off, and Christian gets in the ring. He puts JB’s head on one chair, is armed with the other, CON-CHAIR-TO!!! Christian then sits by his former protégé, apparently disappointed in him. Christian takes off his jacket and lays it over JB like he’s dead and buried. Fans call Christian an A-Hole, but he doesn’t care.

Even after AEW officially goes off the air, Christian stays in the ring. He takes his jacket back to say he told JB this would happen, and that they should’ve listened to him. Christian then goes to JB’s mother and sister, but they flip him off and tell him to GTFO. Christian tells them they raised a POS, but happy birthday anyway. Has Captain Charisma just crushed the career of Jungle Boy? Or can JB make a comeback and avenge this betrayal?


My Thoughts:

What an awesome night for AEW! Road Rager made for a great event that propelled a lot of things towards Forbidden Door and Blood & Guts 2022. The Hair VS Hair was a great opener, and of course the JAS got involved. Great to see what will surely be the Blood & Guts team fight them, but also a very clever twist for Sammy to be disguised as Fuego. Sammy rejoining Jericho’s team and bringing Tay along feels like a fallback plan since they wrote Sammy out of the TNT Championship picture for now. At the same time, Sammy and Garcia being in the same faction oddly feels redundant, and there’s just so much about Daniel Garcia that says he should join Blackpool Combat Club, so that he can be a “pro-wrestler,” not a “sports entertainer.”

Jericho and the JAS interrupting Moxley and Tanahashi was a bit of a surprise but it also makes sense with everything they’re building to. And I like that we’re getting a team-up of JAS & Suzuki-Gun to take on the extended BCC family. With that match essentially being the go-home to Blood & Guts though on the Forbidden Door PPV, it could go either way and hint at who is winning Blood & Guts. As for Moxley and Tanahashi, they both stand tall so they both have momentum, but I’m still leaning towards Moxley winning. Interim or not, someone in AEW is having the AEW World Championship to await CM Punk’s return.

I said it last week and I was proven right: Wardlow VS 20 jobbers was the biggest and best squash match in wrestling history. Granted, I lost count because I think the announcement of eliminations was early. Those five guys at the start came back around and got eliminated later. But either way, of course Wardlow wins, and with Lambert calling him out, it is obvious we’re getting Wardlow VS Scorpio for the TNT Championship. Hard to call that one, but fans would love for Wardlow to win. Ethan VS Miro was great stuff, too, but as I figured, Miro wins to go on to Forbidden Door. And as I said before, it is basically Miro’s to win because he’s returning, and because other things cancel out.

Dax VS Ospreay was an amazing match, and it was basically happening just because! There will be more between the United Empire and the extended Best Friends faction, and it is great that we’re getting Ospreay VS Cassidy for the US title. And we’re getting much, much closer to seeing the various tag titles on the line, between the IWGP Heavyweight Tag titles and the ROH World Tag titles. Really good promos from Darby and reDRagon, I would think Darby beats Fish to then get a rematch with Kyle. Good promo from Dante and Sydal to hype up Dante VS Moxley, but I would think Moxley wins to get more momentum towards Forbidden Door. And very good segment between Stokely and Willow to set up Willow VS Jade, though I don’t see Willow winning.

Great segment from Hangman, Cole and Jay White. It makes a lot of sense that Hangman wants the title more than a specific opponent, and of course Cole and White are going to tell him, “No.” But that only foreshadows that Hangman will force them to give him the match, and maybe Cole can default to facing Okada. Cole is apparently resting up from some injuries, so that’s why he’s only been running Hangman down verbally and we’re not getting Adam VS Adam III to face the IWGP World Heavyweight Champion. And Okada having his name mentioned could motivate him to show up and have a match on the Forbidden Door card.

And of course, we got an awesome main event. They didn’t mention anything on air but those in the know already know Jeff Hardy is in trouble with alcoholism again. A damn shame, and I hope he finally breaks through that addiction. But what we got out of Jurassic Express VS Young Bucks was still incredible, PPV level stuff. Holy crap, Luchasaurus crashing through that double decker of tables. And the Young Bucks winning makes a lot of sense, this seemed like the right time to shift gears in the tag division. And apparently it was also the perfect moment for Christian to betray JB, holy crap that was wild stuff. This could give JB some time off, and then he’ll have an amazing return as he goes for revenge on Christian.

My Score: 9.5/10


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AEW Coverage

Mitchell’s AEW Dynamite Results & Report! (5/22/24)

Roll the dice!

Published

on

It’s a risky gamble before Double or Nothing!

Double or Nothing is on Sunday, so Dynamite sets the table! Will AEW World Champion Swerve Strickland use Nick Wayne to send a message to Christian Cage?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Will Ospreay & Orange Cassidy VS Trent Beretta & Roderick Strong w/ The Undisputed Kingdom; Trent & Roddy win.
  • FTW Championship #1 Contender’s Triple Threat: Hook VS Katsuyori Shibata VS Bryan Keith; Hook AND Shibata win and will both challenge Chris Jericho for the title at Double or Nothing.
  • Konosuke Takeshita w/ Don Callis VS Matt Sydal; Takeshita wins.
  • Swerve Strickland VS Nick Wayne; Swerve wins.
  • Malakai Black VS Kyle O’Reilly; Malakai wins.
  • Toni Storm & Mariah May w/ Luther VS The Outcasts w/ Zak Knight; Storm & Mariah win.
  • Bryan Danielson VS Satnam Singh w/ Team Triple J; Bryan wins, by disqualification.

PLAY BY PLAY

Will Ospreay & Orange Cassidy VS Trent Beretta & Roderick Strong w/ The Undisputed Kingdom!

Don Callis is on commentary as “both his guys” are teaming up as an unlikely duo against another unlikely duo! Will the Aerial Assassin get help from the former International Champion in gaining momentum for his match with the current International Champion? Or will it be #JustTrent and the Savior of the Backbreaker standing tall tonight?

The teams sort out and Ospreay starts against Roddy, but then Cassidy and Trent rush each other on the outside! Ospreay sees that and is distracted, so Roddy CLUBS Ospreay! The fans fire up as there is brawling in and out of the ring! Roddy ROCKS Ospreay, CLUBS him, then whips. Ospreay ducks ‘n’ dodges to tilt-o-whirl RANA! Then Ospreay PLANCHAS Trent! Cassidy goes up to CROSSBODY Roddy! Cassidy then DIVES onto Trent and they hit the desk! PIP PIP CHEERIO for Roddy! Cover, TWO! Ospreay keeps on Roddy but Roddy fights the underhooks! Bennett gets on the apron, Taven throws in a belt, but Ospreay kicks that belt back out.

The ref reprimands The Kingdom but Roddy clinches to an IRISH CURSE BACKBREAKER! Roddy tags in Trent and Trent storms up on Ospreay. Trent drags Ospreay up, CHOPS him, then stalks him to a corner. Trent stomps Ospreay, brings him up to ROCK him, but Ospreay ROCKS Trent back! Ospreay fires more forearms, then runs, but Trent CLOBBERS him! Trent tags Roddy, Roddy pushes Ospreay down and rains down fists! Roddy stomps Ospreay, drags him up, but the fans rally up. Roddy stomps Ospreay, fires body shots and a CHOP, then keeps on him with a clinch, Ospreay ROCKS Roddy in return!

Ospreay fires more shots but Roddy DROPKICKS! Cover, ONE!! Roddy clamps onto Ospreay with a chinlock and he grinds Ospreay down. Ospreay endures, the fans rally, and Ospreay fights up. Ospreay throws body shots then ROCKS Roddy! Roddy knees low, fireman’s carries, but Ospreay slips free to shove and back drop! The fans fire up while Roddy flounders around! Both men crawl, hot tag to Cassidy! Cassidy goes up, Roddy gets under the jump, but Cassidy just BLASTS Trent! Cassidy runs, tilt-o-whirl, but Roddy stops the DD! Roddy sends Cassidy to the corner, but Cassidy goes up and out!

Roddy runs in but Cassidy bumps him off buckles! Then he goes side to side to bump Roddy off more buckles! And then back the other way! The fans fire up, Cassidy climbs, but Trent YANKS Cassidy down! Cassidy is stuck up top, Roddy goes up after him! GUTBUSTER on the top buckle! Then Trent drags Cassidy from the corner! The fans boo as Trent hauls Cassidy up, but Ospreay makes the save! Ospreay sends Trent into barriers! Roddy WRECKS Ospreay with a dropkick! Then he gives Cassidy an APRON BACK SUPLEX, and Trent SPEARS Cassidy down! The fans boo as Trent & Roddy stand tall, but Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Trent flexes, Roddy drags Cassidy up, and Roddy ROCKS Cassidy. Roddy puts Cassidy in, stomps up and stomps on him in a corner, then brings him over to bump off buckles. Tag to Trent, but Cassidy fires off forearms! Trent knees low, Cassidy sits down, and Trent stomps him at the ropes. The ref counts, Trent lets off at 4, and The Kingdom taunts Cassidy. Trent gets Cassidy’s legs to ROPE GUILLOTINE! Cassidy sputters and falls out of the ring, The Kingdom taunting him. Trent distracts the ref and The Kingdom stomps away on Cassidy! Roddy then drags Cassidy up to put him in the ring. Trent covers, TWO!

Trent is annoyed but he drags Cassidy up to tag in Roddy. They mug Cassidy, Roddy CHOPS Cassidy, then Roddy clamps on with a chinlock. Cassidy fights up but Roddy CHOPS him again! Cassidy grits his teeth, stands up, but Roddy CHOPS him down! Roddy soaks up the heat, then drags Cassidy up to pull on his arms. Cassidy endures the motorcycle stretch, fights up, and he works to put his hands in pockets! Roddy turns him around to CHOP! Dynamite returns to single picture, Cassidy puts his hands up, and then in his pockets! Roddy swings, misses, but he reels Cassidy in. Cassidy rebounds to SHOTGUN!

Cassidy works his way over, kips up, and hot tags to Trent and Ospreay! Ospreay rallies on Trent with haymakers! Ospreay whips, Trent reveres but Ospreay ducks ‘n’ dodges to FLYING FOREARM! Roddy runs back in to knee low! Roddy & Trent double whip, but Ospreay handsprings to DOUBLE PELE! The fans fire up, Ospreay covers Trent, TWO! The fans fire up and Ospreay has Trent in a corner. Ospreay runs in but Trent dodges! TORNADO- NO, Ospreay stops the DDT to suplex. Trent slips free, to HALF ‘N’ HALF! Trent tags Roddy, Roddy runs in to KNEE Ospreay! Then back suplex, but Ospreay sunset flips it! TWO!!

Roddy runs up but into a CHOP! Ospreay runs, into a kitchen sink knee! Roddy goes side to side to forearm again and again and again! Then the atomic SLAM! Cover, TWO! Ospreay is still in this and Roddy is frustrated. The fans rally, Roddy drags Ospreay up, and Roddy reels Ospreay in to suplex. Ospreay slips free, ducks Roddy’s knee, and tucks him in! CHEEKY NANDOS! Tag to Cassidy, and Ospreay Electric Chairs Roddy for the POWERBOMB! Then Ospreay goes up, gives Cassidy a thumbs up, and then hits the LEAP OF FAITH! Cassidy’s turn, he LAZY ELBOWS! Cover, TWO!! Roddy is still in this but Cassidy throws off his elbow pad!

Cassidy aims in a corner, but Trent grabs his foot! Cassidy kicks Trent away, Roddy runs up, but Cassidy BOOTS him! Cassidy goes up, but Roddy GAMANGIRIS! Roddy then goes up after Cassidy, but Cassidy fights the suplex! The fans rally, Ospreay joins in and he knocks Roddy down! Trent gets up to get Ospreay, SUPER GERMAN SUPLEX! But Ospreay lands on his feet! The fans are thunderous, and Ospreay BOOTS Trent into the DEEP IMPACT! Roddy CHOPS Ospreay, ROCKS Cassidy, then KNEES Ospreay. Roddy runs, into the TIGER WALL KICK and ENZIGIRI! Tilt-o-whirl DDT from Cassidy!

Cassidy covers, and Ospreay keeps Trent back, but Trent powers through to break it up! All four men are down and the fans fire up again! Trent rises first, “This is Awesome!” as he rips at a buckle pad. The ref says stop it, and then Cassidy mule kicks Trent! SICK KICK from Roddy! The Kingdom distracts the ref, Callis hops off commentary to anchor Cassidy! Roddy can’t suplex him like that! Roddy gets mad at Callis, Callis hurries away, END OF- STUN DOG MILLIONAIRE! OSCUTTER!! But as the ref checks Roddy, The Kingdom run in! Ospreay dumps them both out! And then builds speed to FLY! Down go Taven & Bennett!

The fans are thunderous but WARDLOW CLOBBERS OSPREAY! The fans boo as the War Machine comes outta nowhere! ORANGE P- NO, Roddy ducks and Trent’s BUSAIKU KNEE hits! END OF HEARTACHE!! Cover, Roddy & Trent win!

Winners: Trent Beretta & Roderick Strong, by pinfall

The Kingdom’s numbers are just too much, and now they’re beating down Cassidy & Ospreay! Callis is furious, but then where’s his family!? Trent DECKS Cassidy, Roddy grabs the International title belt! BELT SHOT to Ospreay! Trent won’t let Callis get close, either! SNAKE BITE on Cassidy! Ospreay is busted open! Roddy tells Ospreay he will never have this title! Then Roddy drags Ospreay up, reels him in, and hits END OF HEARTACHE!! Ospreay flounders and writhes, and Roddy paints himself with Ospreay’s blood. Is nothing going to stop The Undisputed Kingdom from conquering AEW?

 

The Young Bucks speak.

Matthew & Nicholas Jackson want their own Elite security to get a good look at who they’re looking for. Nick then says, “Hey, Darby Allin, ya p*ick! You attacked The Elite unprovoked last week, so guess what? You’re barred this week.” Matt adds that in the interest of having the safest locker room in the business, sorry, no Darby allowed tonight. Matt tells the security to be very careful, Darby is resilient. He broke his foot, practically got Final Destination’d by a bus, and he’s still standing, and out for blood! Do NOT let this man in the building! What’re they doing still standing here? Get to your positions! And tuck your shirts in!

In walks Sonjay Dutt and he wants to commend these two for the great job they’ve been doing, and for knowing how to take care of problems. Darby won’t be an issue tonight. Last Saturday, they took care of two more problems in FTR thanks to The Righteous & Lance Archer. And tonight, it all comes to a head. Sonjay’s Indian Giant destroys the American Dragon. Matt says if Satnam beats Bryan, cool. But if he hurts Bryan, great. Alright, so long as the money’s in the envelope with a few rupees, because tonight, Satnam breaks Bryan like a pencil! HAHAHAHAHA! Sonjay heads out, Matt tells everyone to keep the energy up, next segment! Can he get some water? Thanks.

 

Bullet Club Gold is here!

Bakersfield, California fires up as The Bang Bang Gang brings their gold to the ring in a little black wagon. Granted, they don’t need all nine belts, just the one set that represents the Unified AEW & ROH World Trios Championships. Though, they do like to mix and match as they hold one each. Jay White gets the mic and hushes the crowd before saying, “Well, well, well, look at you! The greatest three man team in the game is here!” Fully Cocked Colten Gunn! Switchblade Jay White! And… Austin! THE Unified Trios Champions, the Bang Bang Gang! And White knows what they want. Guns up for the Bakersfield Gold Members~!

But y’know, on that note, White thinks there might be one very special little gold member out there walking around feeling confused, asking himself how he ended up in the situation he’s in. How he ended up burning int he spotlight at the feet of the Bang Bang Gang! That one little gold member is… Pac? Puck? Pock? Pack, but without K. Oh. Okay, okay, Pack. Let White tell him how you ended up here! You made three big mistakes! One: when the Bang Bang Gang is walking down the halls, you run, scatter, turn the other way. What’d Pac do? Looked at them with… that face.

Mistake two: When Bang Bang Gang handled Bang Bang Gang business in this ring with “Azucar” Rocky Romero, one little Bastard decided to stick his ugly bastard nose where it doesn’t belong. Mistake three and biggest of all, Pack, is questioning them. He asked, begged, pleaded for them to make him care, so they gave him what he asked for. But see as the- WAIT! Pac is on the tron! And he tells the Bang Bang Toy Guns that this is what he’s talking about! They warmed him up a bit. And he can’t even be made at them. Like they said, he provoked them first. But gentlemen, three on one? That’s not exactly fair now, is it?

So allow Pac to introduce them to his amigos. His hermanos! His LUCHA BROTHERS! The fans fire up as Penta El Zero Miedo, Rey Fenix y The Bastard, Pac, all stand as one! Death Triangle is reunited! White & The Gunns get ready, but Pac TACKLES White while the Lucha Bros DOUBLE SUPERKICK the Ass Boys! Pac throws adown fists, the others brawl, and the fans fire up! Pac ROCKS Colten, ROCKS Austin, but White knees low! White puts Pac in a corner but Pac dodges to stomp away! Death Triangle stomps away on the whole Bang Bang Gang! They then SUPERKICK everyone out! The fans are fired up but the Bang Bang Gang is in retreat!

Pac gets a mic to tell the boys, “You think you’re hard? Well this Sunday, Double or Nothing, AEW Unified Trios Championships! You think you’re hard? I guess we’ll find out.” Death Triangle wants gold again, will they take it from the Switchblade and his boys?

 

Chris Jericho is here!

The Learning Tree makes his way out, “Big Bill” Morrissey right behind him, because Jericho is joining commentary for what’s up next.

FTW Championship #1 Contender’s Triple Threat: Hook VS Katsuyori Shibata VS Bryan Keith!

While the Cold-Hearted Handsome Devil wants payback on The Learning Tree, so does The Wrestler! They and The Bounty Hunter fought and won last Saturday on Collision, and now they all fight for a chance to go Double or Nothing with Jericho! Will wins big to then go after Jericho “For The World?”

The bell rings and Keith BOOTS Hook right down! Keith runs up on Shibata, Shibata dodges to CHOP! And CHOP! And CHOP int he corner! Hook storms up to fire hands on Keith! Shibata pushes Hook aside to CHOP, CHOP and CHOP! Hook pushes Shibata, the rivals stare down, but Keith RAMS Hook into Shibata! Keith then fires forearms on Hook. Keith runs, but into a SAYANAGI! Hook shoots around, REDRUM, but Shibata gets Hook in a SLEEPER! Keith DOUBLE JAWBREAKERS free! All three men stagger to their feet, and Hook clinches Shibata for an EXPLODER! Shibata comes back to BELLY2BELLY Hook!

Keith gives Shibata an EXPLODER! Hook gives Keith an EXPLODER! Shibata hits an STO on Hook! All three men are down again and the fans fire up! Keith, Hook and Shibata slowly sit up as Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Shibata runs up on Keith, throws him down, and has a HEEL HOOK! Shibata endures, crawls back, and has the ROPEBREAK! Shibata doesn’t have to but he does let off given the hold won’t count for anything now. Shibata drags Keith back, steps through, and FIGURE FOUR LEGLOCKS! Keith fights it, but Shibata clamps it on tight! But then Hook throws down forearms on Shibata! Shibata lets Keith go, crawls to a corner, and Hook drags Shibata up. Hook throws knees into Shibata, then brings him out of the corner to TOSS him out of the ring! Hook then goes for Keith, but Keith wrenches to a HOOK KICK!

Hook falls, Keith goes to a corner, and Keith huffs and puffs. Keith drops a knee on Hook’s head, covers, TWO! Keith huffs ‘n’ puffs more, and he CLUBS Hook to ropes. Keith CHOPS, then follows Hook around the way. Keith CHOPS again, then clinches, but Hook fights the exploder! Hook slips around but now Keith fights the exploder! Keith fires down elbows, but Hook still lifts! Keith fires down more elbows, but Hook tries again! EXPLODER! Both men are down, the fans fire up, and Hook rises. Hook stalks Keith, but Keith avoids the crossface forearms! Hook turns around, Keith KNEES him down!

Keith drags Hook up, underhooks, and Dynamite returns to single picture as Keith hits the TIGER DRIVER! Cover, Shibata breaks it! The fans rally, Shibata kicks and bumps Keith off buckles. Shibata BOOTS Hook in a corner, then runs to BOOT Keith! Shibata rains down forearms on Keith, then runs to BOOT Hook! Shibata HYDRAULIC DROPKICKS Keith! Shibata drags Keith up for a HALF HATCH! Cover, Hook breaks it! Hook knees low, clinches, T BONE SUPLEX! Shibata goes to a corner, Hook grabs Keith. Hook clamps on the REDRUM! But Keith RAMS Hook into a corner! Hook goes up and he goes for a HANGING REDRUM!

Keith RIDING HEADBUTTS! The fans fire up with Keith and he goes up, reels Hook in, DIAMOND DUST! PENALTY KICK from Shibata! Shibata gets Keith up, fireman’s carries, and USHIGOROSHI! Shibata stares Jericho down before putting on the FIGURE FOUR, with HEEL HOOK!! Keith endures, Hook gets in! REDRUM on Keith!!! Keith endures double submissions, he TAPS!! Then who wins?!? The ref has the two men let off of Keith, and declares they BOTH win?!

Winners: Hook & Katsuyori Shibata, by submission (both challenge Chris Jericho for the title)

The fans don’t want a draw, they want Hook and Shibata to fight it out! But Jericho gets on the mic and says yeah, he agrees! Hi, Bakersfield! He just wants to get camera time, right? But Rick Knox, what an interesting call. Two winners, two contenders, makes his job a little harder at Double or Nothing. But such is life, huh? Just gotta say, Hook and Shibata, he’s proud of you both for everything they’ve picked up from The Learning Tree and the Jericho Vortex. But he’s gotta warn you, as the longest reigning For The World Champion in history at over 33 days, he’s just getting started.

So even though it’ll be the first-ever Triple Threat “For The World” Rules match, he’ll walk out of Vegas the winner. Thanks, everybody! But he’s not losing to anyone ever, okay? Thanks, guys! Tony Khan texts Tony Schiavone, and it is official! The first ever FTW Triple Threat, will going Double or Nothing only guarantee Jericho loses?

 

Konosuke Takeshita w/ Don Callis VS Matt Sydal!

The Alpha wants to be IWGP World Heavyweight Champion, but he’s only getting a Title Eliminator match at Double or Nothing. Will the Zen Assassin simply be used as a warm-up and a warning for Jon Moxley?

The bell rings, Takeshita knees Sydal low then CLUBS him down! Takeshita brings Sydal up to CLAW Sydal’s face, then lets off as the ref reprimands. Takeshita drags Sydal up, and throat chops him! The ref reprimands, the fans boo, but Takeshita deadlift suplexes Sydal for a BRAINBUSTER! Takeshita stands up, snarls, and he  stomps Sydal around. Takeshita gives taunting kicks as Sydal sits up, and then Takeshita stands him up. BLUE- RANA! Sydal dropkicks the legs out, then BASEMENT DDTS! Sydal hurries to the apron, then the corner! Sydal goes up, leaps over Takeshita, then keeps going, but into the BLUE THUNDER BOMB!

Takeshita and Callis agree, time to break Sydal! Takeshita stands Sydal up, winds up, ALPHA FOREARM! Cover, Takeshita wins!

Winner: Konosuke Takeshita, by pinfall

Takeshita made quick work out of Matt Sydal, but then offers a handshake, The Code of Honor if you will. Sydal accepts it, but then Takeshita ripcord deadlifts Sydal into a HIGH ANGLE GERMAN!! No honor, no respect, and the fans boo! But Callis loves it! Takeshita stomps away on Sydal, but then here comes Moxley! The Maniac was gonna be here either way, and Takeshita wants to know where he’s coming from! Moxley slips in from the crowd, has a mic, and he steps up to Takeshita. Then he DECKS Takeshita with the mic! The fans cheer Moxley on as he paces around. Moxley kneels and tells Takeshita he’ll see him at Double or Nothing.

Takeshita sent a message with his win over Sydal, Moxley just sent his response! Will this Title Eliminator turn into a slobberknocker?

 

The Young Bucks speak, again.

Nick tells Darby Allin, “you stupid idiot,” that they know he’s watching from somewhere in Bakersfield. They saw him on the travel list, but again, he is banned from the arena! The tech staff is given wanted posters of Darby just so they know, and Matt says it’s time to actually run this show. But sitting at gorilla, right in their spot, is Swerve Strickland! The Realest asks, “What up, turds?” Oh, sorry, is this one of their seats? Matt says it’s fine, he’s the champ, he can make himself at home. Good to see him, by the way. Also, has he seen Darby? He’s banned from the building. Swerve takes a copy of the poster, crumples it up, throws it away, and says no, he has not.

Anyway, hit his music, his match is up next. Matt says yes, of course. Someone do it! Is it this idiot’s job over here? Press the buttons! The music gets going, and Bakersfield is now “Whose House?” “SWERVE’S HOUSE!” But will Nick Wayne simply be Christian Cage’s sacrificial pawn in this game he’s playing?

Swerve Strickland VS Nick Wayne!

The bell rings and Nick throws his shirt at Swerve. Swerve takes that shirt, rubs his junk on it, then throws it back. The two step up, the fans rally for Swerve, and then Nick bails out. Swerve is annoyed, storms out after Nick, but Nick slides back in. Swerve sighs, slides back in, but Nick slides back out. Nick plays cat ‘n’ mouse with Swerve as he again slides in just as Swerve slides out. Swerve feints the slide, and now he has Nick! The fans fire up as Swerve fires off body shots! Swerve whips Nick right into barriers! Nick sputters, Swerve says if Nick wants a father, Swerve will be that father. Swerve takes off his regular belt to SPANK Nick with it!

Swerve gives Nick a good lashing, Nick hobbles away, and the ref reprimands. But the fans want that “ONE MORE TIME!” So Swerve winds up and LASHES Nick’s butt! Nick falls over, Swerve puts his belt back on, and the fans chant, “Thank You, Swerve!” Swerve leaves Nick behind to uncover a crossbar! Swerve brings Nick over but Nick fights back! Nick body shots, but then Swerve back drops Nick into the ring! Swerve then steps in to dropkick Nick down! The fans cheer and Swerve pushes Nick around. Nick goes to a corner, Swerve runs up but Nick puts Swerve on the apron! Nick blocks a shot, and bumps Swerve off the exposed crossbar!

Swerve staggers, Nick triangle jump DROPKICKS him down! Swerve staggers away again, and Nick goes to the apron. PENALTY KICK! Then ASAI MOONSAULT, but Swerve catches Nick! But Nick swings to DDT Swerve on the floor! Both men writhe, and Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Nick drags Swerve up and RAMS him into barriers! Swerve falls in a heap, Nick soaks up the heat, and then Nick stalks Swerve into the ring. Nick clamps onto Swerve, then KNEES him in the back! Swerve staggers up, Nick kick shim down! Nick puts Swerve on ropes to CHOKE him! The ref counts, Nick lets off at 4 and soaks up more heat. Nick then stalks Swerve, snapmares him, and scrapes his soles off Swerve’s face! Nick swaggers as he soaks up heat, but Swerve gets up to fireman’s carry! Nick flails to get free, and he CLAWS Swerve’s face! Swerve goes to a corner, Nick is on him with a snapmare and KICK!

Swerve grits his teeth, Nick eggs him on, and Swerve stands. Swerve snapmares and KICKS Nick! Swerve frowns as Nick stands back up, and the two get forehead to forehead. Nick CLAWS Swerve’s face again! The ref reprimands, Nick lets off, and he kicks Swerve. Swerve hits back, but Nick mule kicks! Swerve goes to a corner, Nick CLAWS at his face again! The ref counts, Nick lets off at 4, and Nick soaks up more heat. Nick taunts Swerve, avoids the kick, then taunts Swerve more. Swerve swings blind as Nick taunts him, JABS him, and repeat. Swerve runs up, misses again and Nick JABS! Nick still taunts Swerve, but Swerve ROCKS him!

Dynamite returns to single picture as Swerve CHOPS Nick, then UPPERCUTS in the corner! Swerve snapmare, gator rolls, and deadlift suplexes, but Nick knees free! Nick then TOSSES Swerve out, goes up and out to the apron, then ASAI- NO, Swerve anchors him on the corner! APRON BACK SUPLEX! Nick falls to the floor and the fans fire up! The ring count starts, Swerve slides in at 4 of 10, and then goes back out to the apron. Swerve aims as Nick sits up, and the fans fire up for the KILL STOMPS to the floor!! The fans are thunderous as Swerve drags Nick up and puts him in the ring. Swerve says this is what Nick wanted!

Swerve goes up the corner, Nick eggs Swerve on! KILL- BOOTS from below! Nick somersault clutches, TWO! Swerve gets out, runs in, but into buckles! Roll up, feet on ropes! TWO!! Nick SUPERKICKS! Then somersault and CODE RED!! Cover, TWO!! Nick is beside himself and Swerve scowls as he sits up. The fans fire up for Swerve but Nick says he’s gonna take Swerve’s House! HOUSE- NO, Swerve blocks the call! Swerve slips around to get a BACKBREAKER, then a power lift into a POWERSLAM! The fans are thunderous again and Swerve drags Nick up. Swerve says, “I am sorry.” But then HOUSE CALL!! Cover, Swerve wins!

Winner: Swerve Strickland, by pinfall

The Realest apologized for his past with Nick Wayne, but that didn’t mean he was gonna show mercy. But then LUCHASAURUS ATTACKS! The monster now called Killswitch takes Swerve out and of course The Patriarch & Mother Shayna are here. Luchasaurus CHOKES Swerve while Christian checks on his favorite son. But Swerve LOW BLOWS the dinosaur and DUMPS him out! Christian doesn’t know until he turns around! Christian wants Swerve to hold on, but then he runs away! Swerve pursues, HOUSE CALL drive-by for Luchasaurus! Swerve chase Christian right up the ramp and backstage!

Cameras follow as we go through gorilla, then to the hallways! Christian tries to block the path as he hurries for the parking lot! Christian finds the rental, throws the valet out, and then drives off, leaving his “family” behind! But then someone pulls up in front of him! It’s PRINCE NANA! Nana was waiting in the parking lot for this! Swerve grabs at Christian, they brawl through the car window, and Swerve drags Christian out! Then he throws Christian into the production truck trailer! And then back into the rental! Swerve beats down on Christian but Christian gets loose. Christian is going up the rental? Swerve pursues, Christian kicks at him!

Both men get on the roof of the car and the brawl continues! Swerve kicks low, DDT onto the roof! Christian sputters, flounders to the hood, and Nana has a chair! Nana hands it to Swerve and Swerve takes aim! But Christian moves before the Car-Chair-To! Christian runs away, but he better be heading to Las Vegas. Will Double or Nothing be the end of The Patriarchy?

 

PROGRAMMING REMINDER for Rampage!

This Friday before Double or Nothing, Rampage will be at a special start time of 6:30 PM Eastern! Make sure your DVR is ready for this special edition!

 

Malakai Black VS Kyle O’Reilly!

Speaking of Double or Nothing, before the Dark Father brings out the darkness inside Adam “Edge” Copeland, he must settle things with #CombatKyle. Will Malakai simply use Kyle to sharpen his edge before he becomes the Face of TNT? Or will this not be The End of Kyle O’Reilly?

The bell rings and the two stare down. The fans rally up, the two slowly approach, then feel things out. They test the waters with kicks and jabs. They go around, Kyle keeps looking for an opening but Malakai clinches him. They go to ropes, Malakai turns things around on Kyle, but he lets off cleanly. The fans cheer, the two reset, and they feel things out again. Each man still tests the waters, and Kyle shoots in for a leg. Malakai fights it, Kyle goes for an arm but Malakai arm-drags free. They start throwing kicks but also guarding! Kyle BOOTS, Malakai BOOTS, and both men ELBOW JAB! Both men KNEE low! Both men back down and the fans fire up!

Malakai snarls, he headlocks Kyle, but Kyle powers out. Malakai runs him over, covers, ONE! Kyle goes for legs, Malakai blocks and throws more knees. Malakai shoves Kyle then sweeps the legs. Malakai runs and springboards, but Kyle kicks Malakai’s legs out! The fans fire up as Kyle storms up on Malakai. Kyle KICKS, SLAPS, and KNEES, but Malakai sweeps the legs again! The fans fire up, Malakai drags Kyle up, and KICKS him now! Kyle hobbles, goes to kick but Malakai blocks and KICKS back! Kyle fires a forearm, Malakai grabs the leg to then JUMP KNEE! Kyle tumbles out of the ring and the fans fire up! Malakai paces while Kyle is dazed, but Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Kyle sits up, shakes out the stars, but Malakai goes out to KICK! Kyle staggers away, Malakai KICKS him against barriers. Kyle KICKS back, KICKS again, but Malakai puts the leg on barriers! Malakai KICKS the leg and Kyle falls back! Malakai drags Kyle up, KICKS him against the apron, then KICKS him again. Malakai puts Kyle against barriers and KICKS! Kyle slumps down and Malakai paces. Malakai drags Kyle up but Kyle fires forearms and KICKS in return! Malakai BOOTS Kyle away! Kyle checks his chin, Malakai puts him in the ring. Malakai storms up but Kyle KICKS! Malakai KNEES low! Then Malakai grabs a leg to DRAGON SCREW! Cover, TWO!

Kyle grits his teeth as he toughs it out, but Malakai stomps him down. Malakai looms over Kyle, Kyle kicks at him from below. Malakai grabs the leg, and has a KNEE LOCK! Kyle endures as Malakai pulls on the leg! Kyle reaches out, fights with his free leg, and Malakai lets go. Kyle stands, hobbles, but Malakai blocks his kick! DRAGON- NO, Kyle sits down on the leg whip to have an ARMBAR! Malakai clasps hands, fights around, but Kyle pulls on the grip! Dynamite returns to single picture, Malakai hooks Kyle for a waistlock, but Kyle fights up. Kyle pries at the hold, wrenches out with a double wristlock, but Malakai KICKS the bad leg!

Kyle staggers back, yoyos int he ropes, but Malakai blocks the lariat and ELBOWS Kyle! Malakai reels Kyle in to suplex, Kyle knees free then fires more knees! Kyle fires off a strike fest, then WRINGS Malakai’s arm out! Malakai staggers away but the fans fire up! Kyle runs in to FOREARM SMASH! Kyle wrenches for an ELBOW BREAKER! But Malakai ROCKS Kyle! Kyle blocks a kick to KNEE and SNAP GERMAN! AX and SMASH! Cover, TWO! The fans fire up while Kyle grits his teeth in frustration. “This is Awesome!” as Kyle rises up. Kyle storms over to Malakai to KICK the bad arm! And KICK! And KICK! And KICK!

Kyle snarls as Malakai stands, so the KICKS keep coming! Malakai ROCKS Kyle, Kyle ROCKS Malakai! The forearms go back and forth, then Kyle KNEES low! Malakai fires a body shot, Kyle fires a one-two! Malakai gives that one-two back, so Kyle kick-kicks! Malakai fires off a flurry of his own, but Kyle fires forearms !Malakai blocks a kick, Kyle slips free, double leg takedown! GROUND ‘N’ POUND, then ARMBAR! Malakai fights it with a strong S grip, but Kyle gets the leg! ANKLE LOCK! Malakai endures and scrambles around while the fans fire up! Malakai reaches out, fights up, and Kyle shifts his grip.

Malakai ELBOWS Kyle, KNEES him, then suplexes, BRAINBUSTER! Cover, TWO!! Kyle survives and Malakai is beside himself! Malakai storms over to Kyle, gets a leg, but Kyle steps over to KNEE! AX and- ELBOW from Malakai! Kyle stays up, DOUBLE ROUNDHOUSES hit! Both men wobble, Kyle ROLLING ELBOWS! Malakai feints then THE END!! Cover, Malakai wins!

Winner: Malakai Black, by pinfall

Kyle got caught by that change in flow, and he just faded to Black! But wait! The lights all turn red! Malakai looks around in confusion, but this can only mean one thing. BLOOD FROM ABOVE?! It’s like something outta Carrie! Malakai is not just drenched, he’s fumbling around from how slick the canvas is! And then, on the tron, walking down the steps… is EDGE! “Malakai. Malakai~! Up here. Be careful what you wish for.” Edge grins and he has fangs! “See you soon.” Is Malakai going to regret bringing out that side of The Rated R Superstar?

 

Toni Storm & Mariah May w/ Luther VS The Outcasts w/ Zak Knight!

The Leading Lady and her understudy have had just about enough of Saraya & Harley trying to troll there way to the spotlight, and now look to finally end this farce! But given she’s still parading around in Serena Deeb’s banner, will the AEW Women’s World Champion be ready for The Professor’s test this Sunday? Or will the madness truly go off the rails this close to Double or Nothing?

The teams sort out and Harley starts against Mariah, a partial rematch from last Saturday. The irony that Mariah’s Toni cosplay is also a Harley Quinn cosplay but Harley Cameron is in all black. The two tie up, Mariah waistlocks, but Harley reaches back, headlocks, and grinds. Mariah powers up and out, drops down, Harley rolls and kicks low! Harley clinches but Mariah ROCKS her! Mariah whips, Harley goes up and out, then ducks Mariah to RAM into her! Harley ROUNDHOUSES Mariah away, goes up and in, then talks trash on Storm. Harley runs but Mariah follows, trips Harley, then keeps moving to SHOTGUN!

Mariah smiles and the fans fire up as she paces around. Mariah gets Harley up, scoops, and SPIN-OUT SIDEWALK SLAMS! Then Mariah fireman’s carries, but Harley slips free to tag Saraya. Mariah waits on Saraya and the two circle. But then Saraya backs away to ropes for defense, she wants the REAL Toni Storm! The fans fire up, and Mariah tags Toni! The two former friends circle now, and Saraya ROCKS Storm! Storm ROCKS Saraya, repeat! The fans fire up as they go back and forth, and are definitely on Storm’s side. Saraya kicks low, whips, but Storm reverses and hits a THESZ PRESS! Storm rains down fists, then tags Mariah.

Storm scoop SLAMS Saraya, then Mariah offers herself up. Storm scoops Mariah to SLAM her onto Saraya! Cover, ONE! Saraya is tougher than that, but Mariah tags Storm back in. Mariah now scoops, but Storm is a bit sturdier. So Storm scoops Mariah to SLAM her on Saraya again! ELBOW DROP, cover, TWO! Tag back to Mariah, she brings Saraya up and fires forearms. Mariah snapmares Saraya, runs and KNEES Saraya down! Saraya flounders, has the ref check her, and Harley runs in to CLOBBER Mariah! Toni storms in but the ref stops her, completely missing the crazy one going after Mariah! Saraya has Harley slip away and she stomps Mariah now.

Saraya does jumping jacks to show off her cardio, and then she HEADBUTTS Mariah as Dynamite goes picture in picture.

Saraya stalks Mariah to ropes, puts her through them, and then steps onto the apron to fire off knee after knee! The ref reprimands and counts, Saraya lets off, and then she steps back inside. Harley storms right up to AX KICK Mariah down! The ref reprimands and Saraya just shrugs. Saraya drags Mariah around, whips her to the corner, then tags in Harley. They mug Mariah, Harley stomps away, then stands her up. Harley digs her boot in, lets off at 4, and then Saraya CHOKES Mariah while Harley argues with the ref! Luther protests, Storm is furious, but the Outcasts get away with that. Harley covers, TWO!

Harley stays between Mariah and Storm and drags her up. Harley bumps Mariah off buckles, tags Saraya, and they mug Mariah some more. Saraya TOSSES Mariah out, storms out after her, then drags Mariah up to RAMS her into barriers! Saraya taunts the fans, soaks up the heat, and blows a mocking kiss to Storm. Saraya digs her boots into Mariah, the ref reprimands, but Saraya drags Mariah up and into the ring. Saraya keeps Mariah from Storm, tags in Harley, and Harley RAMS Mariah into the corner! Harley then brings Mariah around for a NECKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Harley argues the count as Dynamite returns to single picture,

The fans rally, Harley drags Mariah up, but Mariah ROCKS Harley! And ROCKS her again! And again, and again and again! The fans fire up as Mariah just hammers away! Harley shoves Mariah away, brings her around, then JAWBREAKER! Harley runs up, Mariah dodges, and DOUBLE FACEBUSTERS collide! Mariah crawls hot tag to Storm! Storm CLOBBERS Harley, BLASTS Saraya, then goes up and over Harley! Storm runs back at the corner, blocks Harley’s boots, and puts her in ropes for a DRAPING BACKSTABBER! Saraya returns but into JAB after JAB! Saraya falls, Harley returns, but Storm HEADBUTTS!

The fans fire up as Storm poses! Storm then runs to SPLASH Harley in a corner! Harley sits down, Saraya runs in, but Storm drop toeholds Saraya into Harley’s hips! Storm laughs at them, then she drags Harley up for a SKY HIGH! Cover, but Saraya BOOTS it apart! Mariah returns, dodges the haymaker to HEADBUTT a la Storm! Mentor and protege help each other up, pose for a close up, then they each get an Outcast. “This is Awesome!” as they put Harley & Saraya up top! They each climb up, CLUB away, then coordinate. But Harley & Saraya each SMACK Storm & Mariah off buckles! STEREO SUPER SUNSET FLIP POWERBOMBS!! The Outcasts double cover, TWO!!!

Saraya & Harley coordinate now, they get Storm & Mariah in corners to stomp mudholes in! The ref counts, Saraya & Harley let off to coordinate again. They both storm back up for more, but Storm & Harley put a stop to that! They set those boots down, to plant some wet ones on their enemies! Consider their fates sealed with a kiss, because now we get STORM ZERO and MAYDAY!! Harley is then fed to a STORM ZERO!! Cover, Storm & Mariah win!

Winners: Toni Storm & Mariah May, by pinfall

This dynamic duo dominates, and now they again adorn Storm with Deeb’s banner. But wait, Serena Deeb is here! She SMACKS Luther down with a chair!! Then she JAMS Mariah, and HEADBUTTS Storm! The fans are torn as Deeb grins. Deeb brings out a SHOE! HIGH HEEL TO THE FACE!! Deeb grins as she watches Storm crawl, then she picks the chair back up. Deeb uses the chair to take a seat on Storm’s back, and then pulls on a leg! FULL METAL HALF CRAB! Storm taps out, not that this is a legitimate hold in any way! The ref reprimands, other refs rush out to tell Deeb to stop, but Deeb only lets go when she says!

Deeb has just made Storm suffer, and she takes her banner back. Will she also take that AEW Women’s World Championship when she and Storm go Double or Nothing?

 

BREAKING NEWS for next week’s Dynamite!

No matter what happens at Double or Nothing, there will be an AEW World Championship #1 Contender’s Casino Gauntlet match! The winner will receive their shot at the title at Forbidden Door in New York!

 

The Bang Bang Gang regroups backstage.

They have their wagon of gold and are laughing off that surprise from earlier. Jay White’s pretty sure he knows what Death Triangle wants! They want Bang Bang Gang’s loot! They want Bang Bang Gang’s gold~! You want the gold? This is who you bring? The Lucha Bros? When White already has THE GREATEST brother tag team behind him? Colten says it’s just as White says, The Gunns ARE the best brother tag team in the world. And if you wanna shot at the titles, you gotta earn it! So how about a Gunn fight in the Collision Corral. Penta & Fenix are brothers, but so are The Gunns! Penta & Fenix are former AEW World Tag Team Champions, but so are The Gunns!

And Austin says don’t worry, they won’t be hard to find. Just walk into town, look above the saloon doors, and you won’t see “Cero Miedo,” it’ll say GUNNS UP! The Bang Bang Gang is locked and loaded, will Death Triangle win the right to fight for the gold?

 

Bryan Danielson VS Satnam Singh w/ Sonjay Dutt!

The American Dragon always fights against corporate corruption, that’s why he’s standing up against The Elite alongside Team AEW this Sunday! But The EVPs have been doing everything they can to make Anarchy in the Arena a foregone conclusion. Will the One in a Billion be just the thing to ruin Double or Nothing? Or will Bryan prove everyone’s the same size when down on the ground?

As the two get in the ring, Satnam gets right in Bryan’s face. Well, Satnam’s chest does, as he’s quite literally head and shoulders above Bryan. Satnam goes to pie face Bryan but Bryan pushes that big hand away. The bell rings, the fans fire up with “YES! YES! YES!” and the two circle. Satnam puts Bryan in a corner, but Bryan dodges the chop to KCIK, KICK and KICK! “YES! YES! YES!” Bryan climbs up to fire hands but Satnam shoves him away! Satnam BOOTS Bryan down and the fans boo. Satnam stands Bryan up to bump off buckles, then stalks him to another corner. Satnam winds up to CHOP!

Bryan sputters and falls over, and Satnam soaks up the heat. Satnam drags Bryan up, suplexes, and holds Bryan up! Then the SLAM! The fans boo more while Bryan flops out of the ring. Satnam goes out after him, then RAMS him into steel steps! Sonjay clears the desk of the drinks, the action figures, the hood, everything, but then the whole thing falls apart! Satnam kicks the steel steps aside, drags Bryan over. The fans tell Sonjay how he messed that one up, but Satnam still lifts Bryan. Bryan goes to the apron! Bryan KICKS Satnam, and KICKS and KICKS! Bryan gets space, runs up, and FLYING KNEES!

Satnam staggers but stays up, so Bryan resets! FLYING KNEE again! Satnam staggers and takes a seat in the corner of the barriers! Bryan runs in to DROPKICK Satnam down! The fans fire up and Bryan rises. The fans want that again, so Bryan runs back in, only for Satnam to get up and catch him! APRON CHOKE SLAM! Bryan writhes, Sonjay is all fired up, but the fans boo. Satnam shoves Bryan into the ring, Sonjay and the rest of Team Triple J applaud, then mockingly say “YES! YES! YES!” Satnam steps in for a cocky cover, TWO! Bryan is still in this, but Sonjay pulls at a buckle pad. Satnam YANKS it right off!

Satnam storms up on Bryan, drags him up but the ref won’t let him use the bare buckle! Sonjay argues with the ref, so Bryan LOW BLOWS Satnam! Now that Satnam’s cut down to size, Bryan runs and BUSAIKU KNEES!! Satnam even hits the bare buckle! Bryan keeps moving, but Satnam still grabs him! So Bryan KICKS at the legs! And CLAWS at the eyes! And KICKS at the chest! “YES! YES! YES!” Then BUZZSAW! Satnam stays up!? This is a sturdy tree! He CHOPS Bryan, and then he looms over Bryan. Satnam hauls Bryan up, suplexes, but Bryan slips free! HAMMER ‘N’ ANVIL ELBOWS! Satnam drops to his knees as Bryan keeps going!

Bryan then shifts to the omoplata, and puts on the biggest LEBELL LOCK ever!!! Satnam endures, TRIPLE J ATTACKS!

Winner: Bryan Danielson, by disqualification

The fans boo but The Bucks said themselves that this wasn’t about getting the win but about inflicting damage! Jeff Jarrett runs the ref off while Lehtal drags Bryan up. Jarrett gets his guitar, but Bryan slips free! Jarrett avoids hitting Lethal, but then Bryan dodge shim again! BUSAIKU KNEE for Lethal! BUSAIKU KNEE for Jarrett! Sonjay tries to sneak in, but Bryan has the guitar! Sonjay clubs Bryan, but it was weak! Bryan swings, Sonjay dodges, and Satnam PUNCHES through the guitar!! The mugging continues, then Satnam hits a SPLASH in the corner! The fans boo, but now The Bucks make their way out here!

Matthew & Nicholas step out of the Codyvator and they have that envelope! That’s the payment for this hit job on Bryan! Jarrett CHOKES Bryan, then rains down fists! Sonjay receives the payment, and it looks good to him. The Bucks have Jarrett stand down, he did great. They shake hands, then The Bucks get to stomp Bryan! The fans boo as the EVPs drag Bryan to center, sit him up, and give him an E V P- NO! Bryan avoids the knees and they hit each other! Bryan KICKS and KICKS and KICKS! “YES! YES! YES!” Bryan fires hands on Matt, “YES! YES! YES!” But here comes The Rainmaker! Bryan is ready for Okada, but then JACK PERRY ATTACKS FROM BEHIND!

The fans boo as Scapegoat takes down Bryan, and now The Elite all mug him! Ripcord, RAINMAKER LARIAT!! This isn’t over, either, as they drag Bryan out of the ring and up the ramp! And surprise! There’s a table waiting! But wait, who is this pulling up to the arena? It’s DRABY ALLIN! He fist bumps Tony Khan, who drove him here!! TK can travel now!? Darby storms into the ring, armed with some kind of airsoft gun! The Elite is freaking out, but here he comes! That’s not an airsoft gun, that’s a FLAMETHROWER!! The Elite freaks out even more, and then Bryan finally gets to fight back! He fires off KICKS on Nick, then TOSSES Nick down through the table!!

The fans are going nuts, and Anarchy in the Arena is only going to be crazier! Will nothing stop the revolution against The Elite’s “revolution?”


My Thoughts:

An awesome episode of Dynamite as the go-home to Double or Nothing. For one, that was a wild way to end the show. I should’ve figured Bryan would win against Satnam, and making it by disqualification technically protects Satnam’s first singles loss. Satnam did have a great showing otherwise. The Bucks had good promos with how they banned Darby from the arena all night, which naturally meant he was showing up at the end there. Great surprise that it was Tony Khan who got him there, and then that flamethrower gun was a wild move, too. Nick ended up with serious road rash from that table crash but I would think he’s okay. But unless The Elite turns things around on Saturday, the go-home math says The Elite wins Anarchy in the Arena.

Great opening tag match from Ospreay & Cassidy VS Trent & Roddy, and I like the subtle details of Callis wanting to help Cassidy more than Ospreay. Trent & Roddy win here because there’s a very good chance Ospreay takes the title and Cassidy gets revenge on Trent. Takeshita squashing Sydal so hard was a little surprising, but Moxley getting the better of Takeshita was not. As I’ve said on the other articles, Takeshita is surely getting a win off Moxley since it’s just a Title Eliminator, and there’s a very good chance we get Moxley VS Takeshita at Forbidden Door. As such, Moxley should definitely beat Evil at NJPW Dominion in early June.

Very good tag match from Storm & Mariah VS Saraya & Harley, with a great win for Storm & Mariah but then great ambush by Deeb. Deeb stands tall, so it feels like Storm wins at Double or Nothing, maybe with help from Mariah and Mina Shirakawa to get us towards mentor VS mentor for the heart and mind of Mariah. Really good stuff out of Bang Bang Gang and Death Triangle, but Bang Bang Gang needing a backstage promo to establish they aren’t just giving up a title match was redundant. Have them say all that from the stage so that it saves time. But given that we’re getting Penta & Fenix VS Gunns, I would think Death Triangle is earning that match. Who knows how the title match goes, but it seems like a shame if Pac loses another PPV title match.

Great match from Malakai VS Kyle, a lot more than I was expecting to get as the go-home. And then what a wild mind game move from Edge, that “blood” hit so fast and hard! Brood Edge is making his AEW debut, but I can’t be sure on the math. Malakai won a match but Edge basically stood tall with that blood prank. Great Triple Threat from Hook, Shibata & Keith, but I’m rather surprised by how they did the finish. Could just be coincidental, but it was a little too much like what we saw last night on NXT with a double pin finish to make a title match into another Triple Threat. Pretty sure Hook and Shibata are now going to cancel out and Jericho retains.

Great match from Swerve VS Nick Wayne, great win for Swerve, and great segue right into that attack and chase scene. Great return for Nana there, but Christian running away muddies the math. I don’t think Swerve is losing, so something must happen on Collision to turn things around in Christian’s favor.

My Score: 8.9/10


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Mitchell’s AEW Rampage Results & Report! (5/18/24)

Deonna Purrazzo’s on a Rampage!

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The Virtuosa is sharpening her edge!

Deonna Purrazzo wants to tear into Thunder Rosa, but she’ll have to settle for Robyn Renegade first! Will The Virtuosa fine tune her style for La Mera Mera?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Kyle O’Reilly VS Lee Moriarty w/ Anthony Ogogo; Kyle wins.
  • Rush VS Cody Chhun; Rush wins.
  • Deonna Purrazzo VS Robyn Renegade; Deonna wins.
  • Brian Cage VS Anthony Bowens w/ Billy Gunn; Cage wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Kyle O’Reilly VS Lee Moriarty w/ Anthony Ogogo!

#CombatKyle may have lost out on the TNT Championship, but he isn’t going to stop the comeback over it. Will he build back up towards another title opportunity? Or will #TAIGASTYLE prove he’s the one deserving of those chances?

The bell rings and the two circle. The fans rally, Kyle and Lee tie up, Kyle waistlocks, but Lee wrenches out. Kyle wrenches to waistlock, but Lee sits to switch. Kyle switches, facelocks, wrenches, but Lee rolls and rolls until he rolls free. The fans rally as the two circle again. They knuckle lock, go shoulder to shoulder, but Kyle gets under. Kyle lifts but Lee fights that. Lee lifts but Kyle fights that. Kyle tries again, but Lee trips him! Kyle uses his leg guard, trips Lee, knuckle lock cover! ONE as Lee gets an arm up! Kyle pushes it down, ONE as Lee gets the other arm up. Kyle puts that arm down, TWO as Lee bridges!

The fans cheer this technical exchange, Kyle jumps but Lee catches him! DOUBLE WRISTLOCK! Kyle scrambles around, slips free, ARMBAR! Lee clasps hands, stacks Kyle, TWO! Lee rolls Kyle to get the SLEEPER! Lee also has body scissors! But Kyle pulls on Lee’s leg, and that makes Lee let go of the sleeper! Kyle gets the leg, twists for a toehold, but Lee rolls over. Lee reels Kyle in, headlocks, then cravats. The fans rally, Kyle wrenches free to cravat back. Lee ELBOWS Kyle in the chin! Lee BODY SHOTS, then BODY SHOTS again! Lee runs but Kyle KNEES Lee low! Kyle snapmares, runs, then SLAPS Lee!

The fans fire up but Lee gets up. They get face to face, then go forearm to forearm! Kyle fires off fast strikes and he KICKS the legs out! Kyle wrenches to YANK the arm, then CLUBS it! Kyle wrenches, YANKS the arm again, then wrenches to an ELBOW- NO, Lee shoves Kyle away! Kyle runs up but Lee BUCKLE SHOTS him! Kyle staggers away, the fans are torn, and Lee runs up to KICK the bad leg! Ogogo applauds, Lee fires himself up, and Rampage goes picture in picture.

Lee stomps Kyle down, drags him back up, and top wristlocks. Lee isolates that arm, flexes, and STOMPS the arm! Lee paces around, drags Kyle up, and SNAP HALF HATCHES! Cover, TWO! But Lee still has the arm and he hammerlocks it, to then SNAP LOCK it! Kyle endures, grabs at Lee, but Lee bridges and moves around. Lee traps the one arm, pulls on the other, and then makes it a RECLINER! Kyle endures as Lee leans back! Lee lets off as he loses the hold, but then he stomps the bad arm! Lee soaks up the heat as Rampage returns to single picture. Lee grinds Kyle’s bad arm, but Kyle fights up to throw body shots.

Kyle wrenches, ELBOW- NO, Lee has a SLEEPER now! Kyle rolls but Lee holds on tight! Kyle fights up to back suplex! Lee lands out, but Kyle KICKS! SLAPS! KNEES! KICKS! LEG SWEEP! The fans fire up and Kyle snarls as Lee goes to a corner. Kyle runs up to forearm smash! Kyle wrenches, ELBOW BREAKERS, and hits a BIG back suplex! HEEL HOOK! Lee endures and fights towards ropes! ROPEBREAK! Kyle lets go, Lee stands, and Kyle KICKS the leg out! Kyle runs up but Lee dodges the kick to SOBAT! Kyle goes to a corner, Lee runs in, but Kyle blocks the boot! Kyle shoves Lee down, KNEES him, then reels Lee in.

Lee wrenches out of the suplex, to SNAP the fingers! Lee runs up to BOOT Kyle in the corner! Kyle falls, Lee covers, TWO! Kyle survives but Lee reels him in, BORDER CITY STRETCH!! Kyle endures, powers through to clasp hands, and he deadlifts Lee into a CAPTURE SUPLEX! Lee is dazed and Kyle slowly rises. The fans fire up, Kyle storms up, and KICKS Lee’s arm! Lee KICKS Kyle’s arm in return! Kyle KICKS again, but Lee KICKS again! They KICK and KICK and KICK! The fans are behind Kyle, both men block kicks, so they start throwing palm strikes! The fans are thunderous! Both men let the other go, but then they DOUBLE ROUNDHOUSE!

The fans are thunderous as Kyle and Lee are both down! A standing count starts, both men slowly rise, and they stagger into each other. Lee gets Kyle first, suplex and- NO, Kyle knees free! GUILLOTINE! Lee wrenches free to RAM shoulders! Lee wrenches, to ELBOW- NO, Kyle wrenches to ELBOW BREAKER! Hammerlock, GUILLOTINE HOVERBOARD COMBO!!! Lee endures, and he uses his free arm to pry free! For HEADBUTT after HEADBUTT! Kyle drops into a TRIANGLE HOLD!! Lee is fading fast, but he deadlifts Kyle with the one arm! Only to go out! Kyle is free to PENALTY KICK!! Kyle gets Lee up, to ORANGE CRUSH into the ARMBAR! Lee taps, Kyle wins!!

Winner: Kyle O’Reilly, by submission

Shane Taylor Promotion takes another loss on the night, but it was a hell of a fight against Kyle O’Reilly! But Kyle is going to face Malakai Black this Wednesday, will Dynamite be The End of Kyle’s comeback?

 

Backstage interview with The Acclaimed.

Lexy Nair is with Max Caster, Anthony Bowens & Billy Gunn. First off, congrats on the recent success of the newest video. Thank you, Lexy. And Bowens is facing Brian Cage in tonight’s main event, how- Daddy Ass has us stop there. Let’s talk about everyone going crazy, running wild. The Embassy turning on Swerve, The Elite abusing their authority. Billy isn’t sure if Lexy has watched older wrestling, but Billy has a thing about authority. So if they wanna get wild, if they wanna go nuts, that is right up their aisle!

Caster says that’s right! He also thanks Lexi for saying those nice things about his song. But that song was about him and Bowens going back to the Tag Division. If you read the lyrics, which are great lyrics, but none of those team decided to wrestle The Acclaimed. Perhaps they’re a little too afraid to wrestle the best team alive. So they took the first match they could find, and that turned out to be Bowens VS Brian Cage 1v1. Sure, Brian is The Machine, but there are a lot of machines that are now antiquated, and we know Brian doesn’t have AI in his brain. In fact, he can’t update his software! It’s about time Bowens takes Brian to the junkyard!

Bowens says that’s right! Platinum Max & Daddy Ass said it themselves, there is a lot of chaos and madness going on in AEW! Bowens tells Brian and his cronies that they decided to side with The Elite, well you’re looking at the foundation of AEW! The best tag team alive, the best homegrown stars, The Acclaimed! That train is gonna roll right through Brian tonight, courtesy of the Scissor King! Because EVERYONE loves The Acclaimed! Say it again, EVERYONE loves The Acclaimed!! The Five Tool Player is fired up, but will he need all those tools to dismantle The Machine?

 

Rush VS Cody Chhun!

El Toro Blanco is back again, and this time he is looking to reach the top of AEW. Will he stampede through everyone put in his path until he is adored with AEW gold?

The bell rings, the fans rally up with “FOUR C! FOUR C!” Chhun runs up but Rush dodges! Chhun hits buckles, then Rush CLOBBERS him! Chhun sits in the corner checking his jaw, but Rush goes to the far side. “If you mess with the bull…” You get BULL’S HORNS!! Rush drags Chhun to a cover, Rush wins!

Winner: Rush, by pinfall

Rush stands tall, but he doesn’t even care to celebrate, because this was more an inevitability than a victory to him. But then he sees Chhun stirring, and Rush drags him out of the ring! Rush CHOPS Chhun right down! Then he whips Chhun hard into barriers! The ref reprimands but Rush THROWS Chhun around again! Rush fires down fists, the fans boo as Rush DECKS Chhun! Rush won’t stop, he finds his favorite bright green cord! Rush LASHES Chhun, even as more refs rush out here! Rush CHOKES Chhun with the cord!! The refs all shout for him to stop, and Rush does. But he wants everyone to remember: Nothing happens unless HE says so!!

Rush storms off, spits on Chhun, and then grabs a chair! The refs warn him, so Rush simply stands on the chair to soak up the heat. Will nothing and no one stop Rush from rampaging his way to the top?

 

Lexy Nair is outside the trainer’s room.

She notes that to close Collision, Lance Archer & The Righteous viciously attacked FTR after the match. Bryan Danielson walks out, Lexy asks for a medical update. Well, The Elite put a bounty on Team AEW’s heads, and it seems to have worked. FTR won’t make it to Dynamite next Wednesday. But the Elite also failed, because here’s the thing. The Elite wants to change the world? They don’t even show up on Saturdays! And the failure is that Bryan is still here! So this Wednesday, Bryan will be on Dynamite. The Elite can take whatever shot they want, but they better get it done the first time. Otherwise, they won’t like the consequences.

Bryan heads out, but are The EVPs going to make sure no one makes it to Double or Nothing to oppose them?

 

Deonna Purrazzo VS Robyn Renegade!

The Virtuosa is still seething over her many run-ins with Thunder Rosa, but it seems their rematch isn’t destined to happen just yet. Will Deonna one-up La Mera Mera by beating Robyn worse than Rosa did?

The bell rings, the two circle, and they knuckle lock. Deonna spins to wrangle Robyn, but Robyn rolls back. Robyn wrenches, wristlocks, but Deonna rolls, rolls and gets free. The fans cheer, Deonna smirks, but Robyn runs up. Robyn waistlocks, Deonna switches, but Robyn switches back. Deonna pries free to switch again, then she trips Robyn up. Deonna runs, Robyn stays low, then Robyn hits a rolling fireman’s carry takeover! Robyn runs up but Deonna ducks the kick to roll her up! TWO, and Robyn staggers up into an arm-drag! Deonna has the armlock, the fans cheer, but Robyn endures.

Robyn fights up, Deonna hits another takeover, and she traps the arm. Deonna makes it a cover, ONE as Robyn gets the shoulder up. Deonna knuckle locks, wrenches, then clamps onto the arm. Robyn fights up to whip free, then runs to sunset flip! Deonna stays up, then slaps the arms away to clamp on an ARMBAR! Robyn fights around, flails, and has the ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Deonna lets go at 4, and Rampage goes picture in picture.

Deonna stalks Robyn, brings her around and whips, but Robyn holds ropes. Deonna ROCKS Robyn, Robyn still holds ropes! Deonna ROCKS Robyn again, whips, but Robyn reverses. Robyn ducks the forearm, and the backhand, then clinches for a HALF NELNSON FACEBUSTER! Robyn fires up, she sits Deonna up, and runs to SHOTGUN her down! Cover, TWO! Robyn is frustrated, but she drags Deonna back up and bumps her off buckles. Robyn CHOPS Deonna, smirks, and winds up to CHOP again! Robyn says one more time, then puts some stank on it. But Deonna dodges to CHOP back! Deonna whips corner to corner, but Robyn reverses.

Robyn runs in, but Deonna puts her on the apron! Robyn ROCKS Deonna first, steps in, but Deonna ARM CODE BREAKERS! Robyn writhes, Deonna storms over, and Deonna drags Robyn up. Deonna knuckle locks, wrenches, then top wristlocks to wrangle Robyn. Deonna traps the arm for a SNAP LOCK! Cover, TWO! Robyn clutches the arm but Deonna is on her again. Deonna pulls on the bad arm, then top wristlocks. Robyn endures as Deonna thrashes the arm, and Rampage goes to break.

Rampage returns and Deonna wrenches Robyn’s arm. Robyn ROCKS Deonna, but Deonna wrenches again. Robyn fires off a flurry of forearms and the fans fire up! Deonna shoves Robyn but Robyn LARIATS on return! The fans fire up with Robyn, then she wrenches Deonna to reel her in, put her in ropes, and KNEE her! Robyn runs to then STOMP Deonna down! Cover, TWO!! Deonna survives and Robyn is frustrated. The fans rally, Robyn drags Deonna up, then fireman’s carries. Deonna slips free, shoves, and BOOTS Robyn down! Deonna slashes her throat and vows to end this! The fans fire up as Deonna drags Robyn up.

Deonna Gotch hooks, but Robyn slips free! Robyn pump handles, but Deonna arm-drags free! Deonna BOOTS the lariat, ARMBAR DDT! FUJIWARA!! Robyn taps, Deonna wins!

Winner: Deonna Purrazzo, by submission

Deonna didn’t even need Venus De Milo, but then she puts that on Robyn anyway!! The ref reprimands, the fans boo, but Deonna makes Robyn suffer in Rosa’s place! But wait, here comes Thunder Rosa!! La Mera Mera rushes the ring, but Deonna runs away! So when does the part about regretting to mess with a Jersey girl come in? Rosa checks Robyn, and Deonna slithers back in! Deonna CLOBBERS Rosa from behind! Oh so that’s the part about Jersey? Rosa gets up, though, and Deonna retreats again. Rosa runs Deonna down and grabs her by the hair! Rosa drags Deonna back to the ring to RAM her into the apron!

The fans fire up as Rosa tells Deonna to fight her now! Rosa puts Deonna in, Deonna rolls out of the ring and runs into the crowd! The fans boo as Deonna flees into the night. When and where will Deonna have to give Rosa this fight?

 

Scorpio Sky speaks.

“I have done things people dream about. I’ve made money, faced legends, won championship after championship after championship. And you might not wanna hear this, but that was easy. And that doesn’t mean I don’t relate. I understand a normal person put in my position would fail. Because since time began, when people wanted to see a star, they’d look up at the Sky. And all that does is put me in the perfect place to reach down and lift you all up here with me. So to all the fans around the world, I’m coming back. And I’m here for you.” But will this comeback finally be the time Scorpio Sky reaches the top of the mountain?

 

Backstage interview with Sonjay Dutt.

Lexy Nair says Sonjay asked for this time, what is on his mind? Sonjay says first off, he sure doesn’t need Lexy here so hit the bricks. Skedaddle, peace, see ya. Lexy sighs and leaves, and Sonjay says this is for Bryan Danielson. The Elite have put a price out on Bryan’s head, and Sonjay just got off the phone with them, they have worked out quite the deal. Bryan says he’ll be on Dynamite, and so is Sonjay. But no, Sonjay isn’t the one that’ll take him out once and for all. This Wednesday, it will be The American Dragon VS… The Indian Giant! Yeah, that’s right! The one in a billion, Satnam Singh!

And y’know what? Dragon meat is expensive, so hopefully he goes well with a little chicken masala. This Wednesday, it will be one hell of a cookout! Sonjay laughs to himself, but will Bryan be the one with the last laugh after taking on this giant roadblock?

 

PROGRAMMING NOTE for Rampage next week!

Yes, Rampage returns to Friday nights next week, BUT at a special time of 6:30 Eastern, 3:30 Pacific! Make sure your DVRs know so you don’t miss this special Double or Nothing weekend edition!

 

Brian Cage VS Anthony Bowens w/ The Acclaimed!

The Machine turned on Swerve and then got beat by Swerve, crossing him off the list of top contenders. But will he reboot and head for other title opportunities? Or will The Acclaimed prove they can get it done in any division?

As always, Platinum Max has a diss track! “I heard Brian Cage got captain plans. We leave you bleeding so hard, you got menstrual cramps! Damn you are ugly, lookin’ pathetic. You are so small, get off the Ozempic! When did Brian Cage stop lifting weights? Beat him so bad, whip his ass into shape! Run you outta town just like Daim, because in Portland, Everybody Loves The Acclaimed!” Bowens then says, “PORTLAAAAND~! The Acclaimed have arrived! Scissor me, Daddy Ass~!” And he does~! The fans are fired up, but will Cage get his stuff in in response?

The bell rings and the fans sing “OH~ Scissor Me, Daddy~!” Cage and Bowens circle, tie up, and Cage shoves Bowens away! Cage flexes, fans are torn, and Cage says to scissor that. Bowens has Cage hold on, and then Bowens flexes. The fans cheer for Bowens, and he does scissor that! Cage runs up, Bowens gets around, then CHOPS! And CHOPS! Cage TOSSES Bowens to a corner, takes a swing, but Bowens dodges! Bowens CHOPS and CHOPS, but Cage shoves Bowens away. Cage runs up, Bowens gets under and kicks low. Bowens whips, Cage reverses, but Bowens goes up and over. Bowens hurdles, headlocks, but Cage powers out.

Bowens hurdles, slips around the lariat and DDTS! Cover, ONE!! Cage is tougher than that but the fans fire up behind Bowens. Bowens gets Cage up but Cage SPINEBUSTERS him! Cage says no more scissors! Cage storms up to RAM into Bowens! And RAM in again! And then CHOP! The fans “WOO~!” while Cage stalks Bowens. Cage bumps Bowens off buckles, then says one more time! NOT! Cage trolls the fans, whips Bowens, then runs up to UPPERCUT! LARIAT! SAIDO! Cage asks who betta but the fans are torn. Cage storms over to Bowens, drags him up, and ROCKS him with a forearm. Cage CHOPS, ROCKS Bowens again, then CHOPS again.

The ref counts, Cage whips corner to corner, then runs up. Bowens dodges the splash, blocks the kick, CLUBS the knee then KNEE JAMMERS into a DRAGON SCREW! Cage writhes and flounders to the apron while Bowens catches his breath. Bowens storms up, brings Cage up, but Cage swings! Bowens ducks, feints, then kicks the legs out! Cage hits apron on the way down, and Bowens aims. Bowens slingshots but Cage moves, so Bowens just goes to the apron. But Cage blocks the Penalty Kick to bring Bowens down, POST BOMB!! Cage gloats, then leaves Bowens behind, while Rampage goes picture in picture.

Bowens writhes, Cage goes back out to drag him up, and RAMS him into barriers! Cage brings Bowens around, SMACKS him off the apron, then drags him up again. Cage whips Bowens hard into steel steps! Bowens falls over in a heap, Cage flexes, then Cage refreshes the ring count. Cage drags Bowens up but Bowens pushes him away. Cage BOOTS Bowens down, then brings him up for an APRON BACK SUPLEX! Cage gloats some more, steps into the ring, and storms up on Bowens. Bowens kicks low, throws hands, but Cage JUMP KNEES! Cage digs his boots into Bowens at the ropes, lets off, and Bowens sputters.

Cage CHOKES Bowens again, the ref counts, and Cage lets off again. Cage drags Bowens up, scoops and uses him for bicep curls! Cage then TOSSES Bowens away! Cage swaggers around, flexes, and covers, TWO! Bowens KICKS Cage from below! And kicks him again! Cage KICKS Bowens, whips him to ropes, then CLOBBERS Bowens! Cage clamps onto Bowens with a chinlock and grinds him down! Bowens endures, Cage grinds him into the mat, but the fans rally up. Bowens fights up to his feet, throws body shots, but Cage KNEES him away. Cage wags his finger, gloats a bit more, then runs corner to corner to forearm smash!

Cage soaks up more cheers and jeers as Rampage returns to single picture. Cage run sin, but Bowens BOOTS him! And BOOTS again! Bowens goes up, leaps, but Cage catches him! Cage suplexes, but Bowens cradle counters! TWO!! Cage escapes but Bowens ducks the discus! Bowens hobbles but he still ROCKS Cage, throws more hands, but Cage SOBATS! KICKS! Cage runs, Bowens follows. Cage dodges, Bowens redirects and spins Cage for Rock, Paper, Scissors, SUPERKICK! The fans fire up with Bowens! Bowens mule kicks, front kicks, runs and FAMOUSERS! Cover, TWO!! Cage survives and Bowens can’t believe it!

The fans rally up and Bowens rises. Bowens waits on Cage, runs up to clinch, but Cage fires elbows! Cage waistlocks, full nelsons and SLAMS Bowens down! Cover, TWO! Cage is frustrated, but he wants Bowens to get up. Cage runs up, Bowens moves aside to KICK Cage in the ropes! Then DRAPING APRON DDT!! Both men are down but the fans fire up! Bowens rises, drags Cage up, and fireman’s carries! Cage fights that to POST Bowens! And ENZIGIRI! Bowens flops around the corner, Cage brings him up from inside! DEADLIFT SUPERPLEX!! Cover, TWO!!! Bowens is still in this and Cage is beside himself!

Cage starts up Terminator drums, the fans join in, and he drags Bowens up. Cage pump handles and lifts, but Bowens slips free of the driver! Bowens runs but Cage ducks the kick to roll Bowens up! Bowens rolls through, and he ducks the discus! The SOUTHPAW hits! Cage reels Bowens in, suplexes, DRILL- NO, Bowens slips free to ROLLING ELBOW! And SUPERKICK! Cage falls, Bowens runs to SHINING WIZARD! Cover, TWO!! Cage survives but the fans fire up! Bowens huffs and puffs and fires back up! Bowens waits on Cage, fireman’s carries, but the bad leg stops him! Cage shoves Bowens at the ref!

Cage runs up, Bowens sends him at the ref! Bowens waistlocks but Cage LOW BLOWS!! The fans boo but Cage reels Bowens in! DRILL CLAW!!! Cover, Cage wins!!

Winner: Brian Cage, by pinfall

Bowens may be an excellent former Tag & Trios Champion, but sadly he isn’t at the level needed as a singles guy. Will The Acclaimed have to regroup and focus on going after The Elite? Will The Machine be granted golden opportunities by said Elite?


My Thoughts:

A very good Rampage to once again follow up Collision, but I’m relieved that next week is going to be a partial return to normal schedule. Because as great as the matches here were, they just felt thrown together to tangentially tell stories. For example, Kyle VS Lee was a great match but Kyle has beef with The House of Black but they didn’t want Kyle getting one over on Buddy or Brody before facing Malakai next Wednesday. Shane Taylor Promotions deserves a touch better than being fed to the bigger stories, but maybe they come around as a trio after Double or Nothing to face like Bang Bang Gang or something.

And even our main event was an example of this. Great promo from Acclaimed, great rap from Caster as usual, but also a good choice for Cage to still win out. Cage has done singles champ stuff, is going to be the singles champ guy in whatever the former Mogul Embassy becomes after this, or even just a singles guy all on his own. Rush of course squashes his opponent tonight but him going after Chhun after was a good touch. At the same time, I kinda wanted the ref to reverse the decision and disqualify Rush after the match, throwing him into a worse rage and beating up on Chhun more. And again, why no La Faccion Ingobernable? Donde esta Dralistico, Preston Vance y Jose?

Good match from Deonna VS Robyn but of course Deonna won. Rosa going after Deonna and Deonna running away was not what I was expecting, it’s rather disappointing, and why not just give us their rematch with escalated stipulations already? Deonna VS Rosa in a Last Woman Standing maybe? Iron Woman Match so that it goes right to half an hour? Something cool like that would really show Tony Khan finally wants to do more with the Women’s Division after promising it like two or three times already.

And very good promos from Bryan and Sonjay Dutt to set up Bryan VS Satnam. I would think Bryan wins, but there’s a good chance Team Triple J goes after him post match anyway. As I just said in the Collision article, Anarchy in the Arena being No Disqualifications of the highest level, we could actually get way more than just the eight men advertised as the roster starts choosing sides, a very Avengers Civil War/Endgame type situation.

My Score: 8.6/10


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