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Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (8/29/22)

There’s gold in the Steel City!

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WWE Raw 2022

Oh, it’s true. It’s DAMN true!

With Kurt Angle welcoming Raw to Pittsburgh, there will be NEW WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions crowned as Kai & Sky face Raquel & Aliyah!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • AJ Styles & Dolph Ziggler VS The Judgement Day; The Judgement Day wins.
  • Six Woman Tag: Bianca Belair, Alexa Bliss & Asuka VS Dani Mo, Kay Sparks & Katie Arc; Bianca, Alexa & Asuka win.
  • Kurt Angle’s Fate: The Street Profits VS The Alpha Academy; The Profits win and Angle does not have to join the Alpha Academy.
  • Bobby Lashley VS The Miz w/ Tommaso Ciampa; Lashley wins.
  • Kevin Owens VS Jey Usos w/ Jimmy Uso & Sami Zayn; wins.
  • Vacated WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships Tournament Finals: Dakota Kai & Iyo Sky w/ Bayley VS Raquel Rodriguez & Aliyah; Raquel & Aliyah win and are the new WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions.

PLAY BY PLAY

AJ Styles & Dolph Ziggler VS The Judgement Day!

The Phenomenal One is in Pittsburgh and fans cheer as he heads to the ring. And then the Showoff makes his entrance for another team-up of A to Z. Will they be able to stand tall against the Prince and the Punisher? Or will this be their Judgement Day?

The teams sort out and Ziggler starts against Finn. They tie up, Finn headlocks but Ziggler powers out, only for Finn to run him over. Finn taunts Styles but Ziggler rolls him up! TWO, and Ziggler DROPKICKS Finn down! Tag to Styles but Finn gets away and tags Priest. The Prince isn’t going to let either opponent get proper payback for what he’s done. Styles and Priest circle, Priest kicks low then ROCKS Styles in the corner, firing off haymakers and stomps! The ref counts so Priest sucker punches Ziggler! Styles ROCKS, CHOPS and whips, but Priest reverses. Styles rolls off Priest’s back to DROPKICK him! Then he clotheslines Priest out of the ring!

Judgement Day regroups but Styles slingshots! The forearm takes out Priest, and Ziggler has Finn and Rhea stay back. The #PhenomenalShowoffs are in control as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns and Finn has Ziggler down in a headlock. Finn thrashes Ziggler around, but fans rally up as Ziggler fights to his feet. Ziggler throws body shots but Finn knees low! Finn swings but Ziggler counter punches! And again, and again! Ziggler whips, Finn reverses but Ziggler sunset flips, only for Finn to roll through and basement dropkick! Finn looks at Styles but he drags Ziggler up and reels him in. Finn is mocking Styles even more now! But Ziggler slips out of the bomb to hit a FAMOUSER! Fans fire up while both men are down! Ziggler and Finn flounder for their corners, hot tags to Priest and Styles!

Styles dodges Priest, counter punches, PHENOMENAL BLITZ! Then SLIDING FOREARM! Styles fires up, stares Rhea down then hits a clothesline in the corner! Styles shoves Priest out but Priest dodges! Styles holds up from hitting Finn? Priest DECKS Styles into Finn! Finn falls, Priest choke grips Styles! SOUTH OF- NO, Victory Roll! TWO!! Priest kicks but Styles blocks into a fireman’s carry! USHIGOROSHI! Cover, TWO! Priest survives but Styles keeps on him. Styles reels Priest in but Priest powers out! Priest runs but Styles catches him for the roll, CALF CRUSHER! Priest endures and fans fire up!

Priest claws his way forward, Rhea and Finn push the rope closer, ROPEBREAK! The ref reprimands and counts, Styles lets go at 4. Ziggler CLOBBERS Finn! Styles runs, but into a BACKBREAKER! Priest drags Styles up, for the RECK- NO, Styles slips out! Styles ducks a kick to ENZIGURI! Priest wobbles, Styles tags Ziggler. They whip Priest but Priest reverses to back drop Styles! Ziggler O’Conner Rolls but Finn gets in while the ref is checking on Styles. Ziggler blocks a boot to SUPERKICK Finn! But Priest UPPERCUTS Ziggler, then choke grips for the SOUTH OF HEAVEN CHOKE SLAM! Cover, Judgement Day wins!!

Winners: The Judgement Day, by pinfall

Priest may have used the Prince as a pawn there, but a win is a win! Will this trio continue to punish all those who oppose them?

Wait! Driving into the arena… IT’S EDGE!! The Rated R Superstar has made the trip to Pittsburgh and the Judgement Day decides to stand their ground! Fans chant, “We Want Edge!” Will he go right for the trio? We’ll see, after the break.

 

Raw returns with Judgement Day pacing.

They all have mics and Rhea tells Edge, “We saw that you’re here, so why don’t you come down to the ring? Cuz I will happily smash what is left of your manhood!” Finn says he is so sick and tired of the so-called legends! Priest had Edge beat last week, but Edge gets the documentary? Finn beats Rey, but Rey Mysterio gets a documentary? Where’s Finn’s A&E special? He’s the Monday Night Maestro, he’s a legend, so show him some respect! Priest has Finn calm down, and he says the fans may not like it, but Finn didn’t tell any lies. And Priest says he kept his word last week. He had Edge beat! One South of Heaven, Edge was out!

But no, there was a ref who was “losing his shoes” in this ring, and that made him miss it. But Priest is a man of his word. They’re not in Toronto, Edge doesn’t have friends, family, or the one who wears the pants in the family in Beth Phoenix, to bail him out! Edge is all alone! So let Priest finish what they started last week! Tonight, Edge faces his Judgement Day! They wait, and “You think you know me.” Here comes Edge! The Rated R Superstar’s music hits, he gets on stage and he fires the fans up! Edge also has a mic, the pyro hits, and then Edge says, “Y’know what? The three of you made some valid points. You also made some completely ridiculous points.

“Finn. Rey Mysterio and I didn’t come back to steal your glory. As a matter of fact, I came back to teach you what it is to reach my glory because I’ve already had it. But your ego was too big and got in the way. Now I believe that you want to end my career. And we’re not in my hometown, we’re in Pittsburgh. And you’re right, I don’t have Beth here tonight to watch my back. But to talk about your other statement, I’m comfortable enough in my masculinity to admit that Beth and I both were the pants in our family. A) Because it’s 2022 so quit being a caveman, you’re gonna be single for the rest of your life.

“And B) Beth is a badass! And Rhea, you best keep your hands to yourself or you’re gonna find why she’s the Glamazon, kiddo. Now Priest, last week, you and I went to war. And I beat you! So now, I am standing here all by myself while the three of you are standing in that ring looking all angry and emo because you couldn’t score tickets to the My Chemical Romance tour, telling me that I gotta face my Judgement Day, whatever that means. But guess what? Here’s what you didn’t learn all those months sitting under my learning tree. You didn’t pay attention.” Edge gets up on the apron, and says he isn’t here alone!

The Mysterios sneak into the ring! And they SMACK Finn and Priest with kendo sticks! Then Edge gets his shots in! Edge and Rey beat up on Finn while Dom keeps after Priest. But Priest RAMS Dom into buckles! Edge gets in to clothesline Priest out! They brawl now, Edge DECKS Priest over barriers! But Rhea finds Dom all alone! Rhea tells Dom he doesn’t want to hit her. Just put the kendo stick down. Dom keeps hold of the kendo stick and tells her to stay back. He will hit her if he has to! Rhea smiles and tells him to put the stick away. She promises she won’t hurt him, and he lets Rhea take the stick.

Edge and Rey return and Rhea dares them to get closer so she can hit them! They dare her to try. But Priest and Finn get Rhea out of the ring! The Judgement Day stands down but Priest promises this isn’t done yet. What will happen next in this war of legends and icons?

 

The Miz and Tommaso Ciampa arrive.

Kevin Patrick wants to interview them but Ciampa cuts him off. Kevin apologizes but it’s a surprise after what happened last week, given Dexter Lumis kidnapped him. Miz will not speak about that. Why are we even worried about him? Lumis isn’t a WWE superstar, so who cares? But Lumis was arrested last Tuesday during NXT. Any insight on that at all? Miz says he doesn’t want to talk about it. He straightens Kevin’s tie for him, then leaves. Will we ever learn what the Tortured Artist did to the Hollywood A-Lister?

 

Bianca Belair, Alexa Bliss & Asuka are headed to gorilla.

With Clash at the Castle and it’s Six Woman Tag match coming, this trio is going to get a tune-up in! Will they be the readiEST team going into this Saturday?

 

Raquel Rodriguez & Aliyah speak.

Aliyah’s bougie, Raquel’s badass, and tonight, they will leave the NEW WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions! They’ve confident, but will they be able to keep Kai & Sky from taking control?

 

Six Woman Tag: Bianca Belair, Alexa Bliss & Asuka VS ???

The RawEST Women’s Champion, the Five Foot Fury and the Empress of Tomorrow are preparing for the Clash, so Pittsburgh’s own get to put them to the test! Will Bianca, Bliss & Asuka become a well-oiled machine? Or will they break down before ever heading for Cardiff?

The trios sort out and Bianca starts against Dani Mo. They tie up but Bianca shoves Dani back easily. Dani tags out to Kay Sparks, and Kay ties up with Bianca, only for Bianca to throw her down! Kay scrambles away to tag in Katie Ark, and Bianca waistlocks. Bianca whips, but Katie reverses, only for Bianca to go up, over and handspring all the way to the other corner. Bianca tells her to kiss this, and fans fire up as Katie runs in. Bianca flips up and over her to then DROPKICK her down! Bianca kips up and fans fire up. Bianca dares someone to bring it, so both Dani and Kay get in. Asuka & Alexa get in as Bianca dodges the double clothesline, and they double SHOTGUN Dani & Kay down!

Bianca brings Katie up, suplexes her for the longEST suplex! Tag to Alexa, she drops Insult2Injury MK. II! Then Alexa drags Katie up, wrenches and YANKS the arm, tag to Asuka! Asuka says kiss this, and Alexa whips Katie into Asuka’s butt! Asuka then uses a HIP ATTACK to knock Katie down! Asuka toys with Katie, Katie throws body shots then a flurry of forearms! Katie runs, Asuka dodges and runs her over! Asuka fires up, runs in, but Katie dodges! Hot tag to Dani, but Asuka is ready! Danie runs in, Asuka dodges, and fires off BACKHANDS and SOBATS! Then GERMAN SUPLEX! Dani flounders and Asuka runs in, SLIDING KICK! Cover, Katie breaks it!

Katie drags Asuka up, but gets a ROUNDHOUSE into Alexa’s DDT! Kay runs in, Alexa ROCKS her, into Bianca’s torture rack! KISS OF DEATH! Asuka drags Dani back up, wrenches and hooks her up, RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP, into the KOJI KLUTCH! Dani taps, Asuka and team win!

Winners: Bianca Belair, Alexa Bliss & Asuka, by submission

The trio is all tuned up, and Bianca gets a mic to say Bayley, Dakota & Iyo can try to come here and run this, but just a month ago, “Y’all didn’t even go here.” Bianca’s been holding it down since WrestleMania, so at Clash, Bayley’s team is going down. Bliss says it’ll get real twisted, because… Asuka says first in Japanese, and then in English, “None of you are ready for Bianca, Alexa and Asuka!!” Bianca says the three of them are talking about damage control, but at Clash at the Castle, this trio is taking control! Will Bianca, Bliss & Asuka show who runs Mondays? Or will they be facing the Role Model and the newly crowned WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions?

 

Ciampa and Miz talk.

Ciampa is preparing Miz for his match with Bobby Lashley, but then Adam Pearce walks in. Pearce wants to talk with The Miz, but Ciampa says Mike has been dealing with a lot of distractions already today. This match with Lashley is his focus. But Pearce was hoping to talk with Miz concerning what happened last week. Pearce wants Miz to know that he has the full support of the company and all their resources, including counseling. Just let Pearce know what he needs. Miz says he doesn’t want to talk about it. He wants to focus on his match. Okay, but Pearce needs to let Miz know, Lumis was released from police custody.

What? How is that even possible? Well Miz didn’t press charges! He didn’t give the police anything to work with! They couldn’t hold Lumis for anything more than trespassing. Miz not talking about this makes it easier for Lumis to get away with it. Miz says he has nothing to say. Pearce is just trying to help. Oh, is he? Is that why he put Miz in a match with Bobby Lashley?! After everything Miz went through last week?! Then tell Pearce what happened! No. Just go away. Miz has to prepare for his match. Fine, fine. Pearce leaves, but what happened to Miz that he’s clamming up so much?

 

BREAKING NEWS for Clash at the Castle!

After the confrontation between them, the Judgement Day will take on the living legends they love to loathe! This Saturday, Finn Balor & Damian Priest will take on Edge & Rey Mysterio 2v2!

 

Ladies and gentlemen, Kurt Angle is here!

Pittsburgh fires up for their hometown hero, and chant “You Suck!” to his theme song for old time’s sake. Angle is in a star-spangled tracksuit and is wearing his gold medal. He gets a mic to say it is so great to be back in his hometown of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania! This Saturday is Clash at the Castle, a PPV so good that you don’t wanna miss it. But then SHOOSH! It’s the Alpha Academy! Chad Gable & Otis head to the ring but fans boo. What business do “Master” Gable and the tree trunk have with the Olympic gold medalist? We’ll find out, after the break.

Raw returns and Gable says, “A THANK YEW~! Pittsburgh… Kurt! It’s Kurt Angle, baby! Not only the hometown hero, but a personal hero of mine.” When Gable was chasing his Olympic dreams, Angle’s story was one that resonated with Gable, and one that motivated him day in and day out. Forget the fact that on top of all that, Angle won an Olympic gold medal. And with a broken freakin’ neck. Gable loves this guy! That brings Gable to his next point. The Alpha Academy is looking for new members. Gable was gonna continue his search here in Pittsburgh with the Alpha Academy Open Challenge, but there is not one shred of talent among the moronic mouth-breathers here!

Fans boo but Gable tells them to shoosh. Fans boo more, and Gable says there is an Olympic hero here, as well as Kurt Angle ,so show some respect! Gable says he and Angle can change the world. For one night only, Gable is offering Angle something he won’t believe: Full-on, no questions asked, 100% acceptance into the Alpha Academy! They’re happy to have you! Otis, give him a jacket! A THANK YEW~! Exclusive merch right here! Great to have you, Kurt! Angel says he’ll pass. Fans cheer as he throws the jacket back! Um… Ex-squeeze me? Is that Angle turning down the single greatest offer ever? This can’t be true!

Oh it’s true. It’s- SHOOOOOSH! SHOOSH. Wait, wait, did Gable just shoosh Angle? Sorry, what Gable meant to say was, shoosh please, a thank yew~! No, Gable’s the one who can shoosh! What? You don’t shoosh the shoosher! Gable does the shooshing! So Angle can shoosh! Gable can shoosh! It’s a SHOOSH OFF! Gable is fuming! You don’t shoosh the shoosher! Otis, show our good buddy Angle what happens when you turn down an offer from the Academy. Otis steps closer, but wait! Here come the Profits! And they’re wearing Steelers colors! Montez Ford asks Pittsburgh, the Academy must not know the motto: You mess with Kurt, you gonna get hurt.

The Profits are back on Raw to make a fuss, because on Friday Night SmackDown, they made a mess of their bus! Which means the Academy so happen to be in the right place at the wrong time. Tonight, they’re looking for a fight! The Profits are up and #WeWantTheSmoke! NO! Everyone shoosh! SHOOSH THE HECC UP!! The Academy accept the challenge, on one condition: After the Academy wins, Angle must join Alpha Academy and does what Master Gable says day-in and day-out! A THANK YEW~! Ford asks Kurt and Pittsburgh: Is it true? Can they do what they do while Angle rocks the red, white ‘n’ blue? Oh it’s true! It’s DAMN true!

Fans cheer for that one! Will Ford & Dawkins make sure an Olympic gold medalist doesn’t end up Gable’s new student? Or will the Alpha Academy shoosh everyone and bump up their recruiting class?

Kurt Angle’s Fate: The Street Profits VS The Alpha Academy!

Raw returns and Angle sits ringside as the teams sort out. The bell rings and Ford circles with Otis. Otis corners Ford and keeps him caught. The ref counts, Otis lets off, and Ford headlocks. Otis powers up but Ford holds tight. Otis powers out, Ford holds ropes, then Ford CHOPS! And CHOPS and CHOPS and CHOPS! Otis shoves Ford to a corner, but Ford elbows back. Ford ROCKS Gable, kicks Otis in the leg, then KICKS and CHOPS Otis again! Otis swings, Ford ducks ‘n’ dodges but runs into a POP-UP POWERSLAM! Otis scowls and Gable brags. Otis tags Gable in and Gable puts Ford in a corner.

Gable CHOPS Ford, CHOPS him again, then mocks Angle’s little spin. Gable tells Angle to watch closely, and he whips Ford corner to corner. Ford goes up and over then DROPKICKS Gable down! Ford shouts out the Steelers and he CLUBS Gable to the corner. Tag to Dawkins, they double whip and run Gable over. Then back suplex SPLASH! Dawkins covers, TWO! Dawkins chinlocks Gable but Gable fights up. Gable powers out but Dawkins runs him over. Things speed up, Dawkins hurdles and then whips Gable. Gable gator rolls but Dawkins slips away. Things keep moving, Gable hurdles but Dawkins handsprings, only for Gable to arm-drag!

Dawkins arm-drags back, fakes Gable out, then dropkicks him down! Otis gets in as Gable bails out, but Ford ENZIGURIS! Dawkins dropkicks Otis out! Fans fire up as Ford whips Dawkins, and Dawkins FLIES! Direct hit at the ramp and fans fire up! Dawkins puts Gable in then covers, TWO! Dawkins stalks Gable to a corner, ROCKS him with a right, then whips corner to corner. Gable reverses, blocks a boot and puts the leg in ropes. Gable gets the other leg, DRAGON SCREW! Dawkins writhes and Gable drags him around for a KNEE JAMMER! And another! Then he YANKS the leg before he tags in Otis.

Otis snatches the headbands off Dawkins and then CHOKES him on the ropes! The ref counts, Otis lets off, then drags Dawkins up. Otis CLUBS Dawkins down, taunts him, then brings him up. Otis CLUBS Dawkins down, tags Gable, and Gable stomps Dawkins. “A THANK YEW~!” Fans rally for Dawkins, he throws body shots but Gable keep shim from Ford! Gable whips Dawkins but Dawkins leaps over Gable, hot tag to Ford! Ford GAMANGIRIS Gable, goes up top and hits a CROSSBODY! Then he DECKS Otis! Ford doges Gable and LARIATS! Fans fire up and Ford gets Gable for a BIG back suplex!

Ford handsprings, flexes and STANDING MOONSAULTS! Cover, TWO! Ford hurries while Gable is still down! Ford gets to the top rope but Otis grabs at him! Ford kicks Otis away, but Gable goes up for a SUPER BELLY2BELLY!! Both men are down and Pittsburgh fires up as Raw goes to break!

Raw returns and Gable brings Ford up. OLYMPIC- NO, Ford slips off, but then Gable arm-drags him away! Ford runs in but Gable catches him to keep him from Dawkins! Ford turns that into a SATELLITE DDT! Both men are down and fans rally up again! Gable and Ford crawl for their corners, hot tags to Otis and Dawkins! Dawkins dodges Otis, hurdles him, and FLYING ELBOWS! Otis stays up to DISCUS ELBOW! Ford gets back in but Otis POUNCES him way! Otis SPLASHES Dawkins, clinches and scoops, POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO!! Dawkins survives but Otis tags Gable back in. Otis and Gable drag Dawkins up and set up.

Otis runs, but Ford dumps him out! Dawkins victory rolls, TWO! Dawkins runs in, CYCLONE SPLASH and an ENZIGURI for Gable! Then the SILENCER! Cover, TWO!! Gable survives and Dawkins can’t believe it! Angle is a bit nervous but Dawkins stalks Gable to ropes. Tag to Ford and Dawkins Electric Chair Lifts. Gable slips off to GERMAN SULEX! Ford CROSSBODIES, but Gable rolls it through! TWO!! Ford runs in but is put on the apron. Ford ROCKS Gable, shoulders in, slingshots, into the NORTHERN LIGHTS! Bridging cover, TWO!! Gable is furious but he tags in Otis. Otis drags Ford up to DECK him!

Otis drags Ford around by his legs, and CATAPULTS Ford! Ford lands on the ropes to springboard back! Ford sunset flips but Otis stays up! Gable tags in and Otis whips Ford, FLAPJACK! DIVING HEADBUTT from Gable! Cover, Dawkins breaks it!! Otis hauls Dawkins up, whips, but Dawkins dodges! DOUBLE CLOTHESLINES take them out! Otis and Dawkins bail out, and Gable stands up. Gable spots Ford, stalks up behind him but stares Angle down. Gable copies Angle again with the straps coming down! ANKLE LOCK!! Ford endures, flails, reaches out, but Gable drags him away! Ford powers up as fans rally, and he stands up!

Ford turns, Gable flips him, but Ford lands on his feet! Drop toehold to the ANKLE LOCK!! Ford has Gable now and Angle is loving this! Gable flails, reaches out, and Ford puts on the GRAPEVINE!! Otis runs in to SPLASH Ford!! Otis saves Gable and fans boo. Otis leaves the ring and says Angle’s joining the Academy! But then Dawkins POUNCES Otis over the desk!! Fans are thunderous and Gable is in shock! Ford gets Gable for a cradle, TWO!! Gable throat chops but Dawkins tags in before CHAOS THEORY! Ford lands on his feet! POUCNE GERMAN SUPLEX COMBO! Tag back to Ford and Dawkins drags Gable into the drop zone!

Ford is up top, to fly in FROM THE HEAVENS!! Cover, the Profits win!

Winners: The Street Profits, by pinfall (Kurt Angle does NOT have to join the Alpha Academy)

The Profits are back up and Pittsburgh is loving it! And to celebrate, the Profits bring the red Solo cups to Angle! Ford pours some of that goodness, and they toast! Angle spews whatever that was right up! Oh, sorry, does he not…? Maybe it was just a little strong? Angle says he has something to make up for it. MILK!! They twist off the tops, and they chug that calcium and Vitamin D!

 

Raw shares footage from just before going on the air.

Matt Riddle had arrived, but Seth Rollins spotted him. They weren’t going to wait for their face-to-face so they brawled in the parking lot! Referees and security rushed in to stop it, and now instead of face-to-face, they must do things via video.

Corey Graves presides over the joint interview.

He thanks them for taking this time, and asks them, what was that we just saw? Rollins says what went down was Riddle was creeping by Rollins’ bus. Riddle says he was not creeping anywhere. Riddle was on the phone, and Rollins says oh sure, talking to Randy, right? They’re talking over each other so Graves has them move on. Where did this all begin? It seems like Rollins has been targeting Riddle for some time now. Rollins has Graves hold on. He hasn’t been targeting Riddle, Riddle has been a thorn in Rollins’ side since Money in the Bank.

The issue here is that Rollins is at the top of the food chain but Riddle is on the come-up. This battle was bound to happen but there’s only one problem: It’s Rollins’ time, not Riddle’s, and Riddle is not on Rollins’ level! Riddle says Rollins is scared of him and that he’ll get embarrassed again. Just like how Roman Reigns embarrassed Rollins, and just like how Cody Rhodes embarrassed Rollins. This is not about Rollins’ embarrassments! This is not about Roman, and this is not about Cody, this is about ROLLINS VS RIDDLE. And here’s a little secret, Riddle: no one likes you! No one can stand the way you talk or how you look.

Rollins promises to finish the job he started back at Madison Square Garden, and it won’t be for Rollins. No, no, no! This will be for EVERYONE, bro! Well if Rollins wants to end Riddle, it’ll take a lot more than what he’s been doing. Riddle will be here for a long, long time, so get used to it! Watch what you say, Riddle. Rollins will finish what he started. And if Riddle wants to be put on the shelf right next to Cody, then that’s what Rollins will do. Rollins will be done with Riddle to move on to the Undisputed WWE Universal Championship, and there’s not a damn thing Riddle can do about it.

Speaking of this Saturday, Graves says these two compete for the first time 1v1 at a PPV. What can we expect? Rollins asks if Graves knows who he’s talking to. Seth Freakin’ Rollins will steal the show, stomp Riddle’s head into the mat one more time, and once and for all prove who the man around here is! Riddle will prove there’s only one man in Rollins’ marriage, and that’s Becky! Rollins is fuming, but the interview wraps. Will Rollins burn down The Bro? Or will this Riddle be too much for the Architect to solve?

 

The Miz and Ciampa walk the hall.

They have their plan, now they’ll execute it. Wait, was that Lumis?! Miz turns around, but there’s only a security guard there. Ciampa tells Miz to have that laser focus. Miz agrees, but he drops his sunglasses. Will Miz be able to focus with the specter of Lumis looming? Or will the All Mighty crush him before Lumis ever gets another chance?

 

Raw shares audio from Rollins and Riddle caught during the break.

They were still mic’d up, and Rollins made sure Riddle was still there. If Riddle wants to talk about Rollins’ family, then let’s talk about Riddle’s. Oh wait, he ain’t got one cuz the wife divorced him and took the kids because none of them want to see his bitch ass again! What did he just say? You heard him, bitch! Come find him! Riddle says he isn’t just gonna beat Rollins up, he’s gonna F him up!! Rollins can keep playing games, Riddle’s gonna get him! Has Rollins just lit a fire inside the Stallion he’ll regret starting?

 

Bobby Lashley VS The Miz w/ Tommaso Ciampa!

The WWE United States Champion cleared out the Psycho Killer as a contender, but the battles keep on coming! Will Lashley make sure the Most Must-See Superstar doesn’t see a title opportunity in his future? Or will Miz prove that he is still awesome?

The bell rings and Miz rushes in, only to get run over! Lashley frowns, drags Miz up and puts him in a corner to clothesline! Lashley throws back elbow after back elbow then ROCKS Miz with a forearm! Miz staggers to another corner but Lashley runs in to RAM him! Miz staggers away again and Lashley runs in at him. Lashley blocks Miz’s boot, brings him out and spins him around to hit an atomic drop! Miz staggers from those tiny balls getting hit! Lashley rips Miz’s shirt off, then gives him a stalling suplex! fans fire up and Lashley holds Miz up with one arm before the SLAM! Then Lashley clotheslines Miz out of the ring!

Ciampa coaches Miz up, but he gets too close and spooks Miz! Miz calms down and Ciampa tells him to get his head in the game. Miz turns around, and Lashley CLOBBERS him! Ciampa backs off as Lashley shows haymaker, and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns and Miz endures the Canadian Torture Rack before the CLIFFHANGER! Miz bails out of the ring and Ciampa coaches him up again. Lashley storms out, fetches Miz and fireman’s carries, but Ciampa blocks the post! Miz slips off, Lashley stops from being posted, and he elbows Miz! Lashley puts Miz in the ring then glares at Ciampa. Ciampa backs off again, and Miz WRECKS Lashley with a dropkick! Ciampa fires up and Miz smacks Lashley off the desk! And again! And again! Miz then RAMS Lashley into steel steps! Ciampa and Miz applaud themselves and pat themselves on the back, but then Miz is spooked by the front row.

Miz puts Lashley in the ring, clamps onto Lashley, but Lashley gets to ropes. Miz CHOKES Lashley, lets off as the ref counts, and Ciampa gets a cheap shot in! Fans boo but Miz runs to BOOT Lashley down! Cover, TWO! Ciampa applauds as Miz is still in control. Miz kicks Lashley around, puts him in a corner, and fires off IT KICKS! The fans taunt “TINY BALLS!” but Miz runs corner to corner, A-LIST LARIAT! Miz says they’re HUGE! Miz goes up the corner, leaps, but Lashley catches him for a COMPLETE SHOT! Fans rally while Ciampa coaches Miz. Miz gets to a corner, he rushes at Lashley, but Lashley CLOBBERS him!

Lashley ELBOWS Miz, then OVERHEAD Belly2Belly suplexes! Lashley runs in at the corner, clotheslines, then keeps moving to RAM into Miz! Miz staggers into a scoop but he slips off. Miz runs, into a MILE HIGH SPINEBUSTER! Fans fire up and Lashley aims from the corner. Miz crawls to the far side, but Ciampa drags him out! Ciampa sneaks something to Miz, and then he delays Lashley. Lashley stalks after Miz as he gets back in the ring. The ref sees Miz has the laminated polaroid picture and stops him! Miz denies he had anything, and Ciampa CLOBBERS Lashley! BASEMENT DDT! Cover, TWO!!

Miz is grinning as he has Lashley where he wants him! Miz gloats about big balls, and he drags Lashley up, but he sees LUMIS in the crowd!! The spotlight points Lumis out to everyone! Miz tells Ciampa to go after him but Ciampa says to worry about Lashley! Wait, Lumis is gone now? Lashley gets Miz in the HURT LOCK!! Miz taps, Lashley wins!!

Winner: Bobby Lashley, by submission

Whatever it is that happened to The Miz, the fear of Lumis is doing more damage than anything! Will Miz ever get his head right? Or will Lumis be why Miz loses matches and his sanity?

As for Lashley, he keeps on rolling, seemingly unstoppable as US Champion. Who will be next to step up to him and challenge him for that title?

 

Kurt Angle talks with Edge backstage.

The legends are happy to see each other again, and Edge did something special for this homecoming of Angle’s. Edge got some pictures made. No, Angle isn’t falling for this again. Oh, there isn’t anything mean written on the back of this. Alright. Yeah, these are their greatest moments together. Check this one. Wait, there IS writing on the back of this one: “Sorry Rey and I beat you for the Tag Titles.” That was a good time! And then this, “Sorry I beat you for the US Title.” The picture is also not too fun, it was their Hair VS Hair where Edge won. But Angle does like being bald, though, so no big deal anymore. In relation to that, the third one reads, “Sorry I shaved your head bald.”

Then there’s this one, “Sorry I started the You Suck Chant.” And “I’m a dork!” “But… You STILL Suck!” Angle feels great after all these. Wow, the meta of how the picture was of Edge pulling this same gag. Angle shows Rey & Dom the pictures, and sees the punchline. He did it again! Cripes, Edge got him again! Rey & Dom chuckle at that, but then Dom brings up Clash at the Castle. He thought it was gonna be a family thing against Judgement Day? It is! Edge is like family to Rey. The reason Rey went with Edge is because he needs that experience by his side against Finn & Priest. Dom gets it, right? Rey wants Dom in their corner, though. He’ll be there, right?

Yeah, Dom gets it. He’ll be by both Rey’s and Edge’s side for Clash. Rey thanks him for that, and they hug it out. Will Dom be able to counter the presence of Rhea while the former tag team championship duo settles things with the Prince and the Punisher?

 

WWE looks back at the origins of Connor’s Cure.

In 2014, Connor’s Cure was established to honor the life and memory of young Connor Michalek to help find a cure for pediatric cancer, so that no one else would have to go through the pain he did. After his passing, he was enshrined as the inaugural recipient of the Warrior Award for his bravery, love and hope. Through Connor’s Cure and V Foundation’s funding, they’ve awarded $4.5 million in grants and helped over 500 families worldwide. The WWE Universe has come together offering hope in the mission to kick cancer’s butt!

 

The Usos & Sami Zayn are here!

The Undisputed WWE Tag Team Champions and the Honorary Uce are feeling great after what they and the Tribal Chief did to Drew McIntyre on Friday Night SmackDown. They all raise their fingers to the sky, #WeTheOnes, then go to the ring, Sami getting his groove on to the Usos’ theme song. They get mics and Jey asks, “Do you see that? Monday Night Raw, the Bloodline is now in your city!” Jimmy says, “730 DAYS! This Friday, your Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns, has been Undisputed WWE Universal Champion!” Sami adds a “YEE!” and Jimmy says everyone knows this Friday, it’s a big, BIG celebration for your Tribal Chief!

Jey gets started but Sami has him hold on. “Sorry to cut you off there, buddy, sorry. Before we get away from that point, I just wanted to add something that’s gonna make this championship celebration even bigger, if you can believe it! It’s that the Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns, has personally appointed me as the master of ceremony for the  night. Which, I mean, as the Honorary Uce, I gotta say, that’s huge.” Jey’s glare shuts Sami up. Sami says let’s not forget what we’re looking at here and now! You are in the presence of the most DOMINANT tag team in WWE History! You are in the presence of the UNDISPUTED WWE Tag Team Champions! Sami means the UUUSOOOS!

Nothing changes, Uce. Which means, Uce, Bloodline runs both shows, Raw and SmackDown! Roman Reigns will beat Drew McIntyre at Clash at the Castle! And it’ll be as simple as it gets around here, folks. But wait! Here comes Kevin Owens! The Prizefighter shakes his head as he looks at Sami. “First of all, the Bloodline doesn’t run anything on Monday nights, because I’ve made it clear these past few weeks, Raw is still the Kevin Owens Show.” But he is glad they’re all here, because he can remind them to tell their boss, Roman, that he owes Kevin one. Jey asks Sami, “Is this your boy right here?”

“Am I?” Kevin asks. “Am I your boy, Sami?” T-Technically… Well, then Sami better get him before Jey does! Oh, get him first, huh? Sami has everyone calm down. Sami will explain things to Kevin. Here’s the thing, buddy. Uh… Well, see, Roman Reigns doesn’t owe Kevin or anyone anything ever. That’s how it is. Kevin sighs. Sami, Kevin didn’t think you could find a way to make yourself stupider than when you started growing that insane hair out. And  yet, every week, Sami manages to, by running around with the Usos and letting them treat him the way they do. Kevin means it, he is genuinely sad to see Sami forget that he is absolutely one of the greatest in-ring performers of all time!

And now, Sami is just the Bloodline’s personal clown. It’s pathetic. Kevin means that. They’ve been through a lot, they’re more than best friends, they’re brothers. So it is sad what Sami has become. Sami should really reassess things. Sami laughs that off. Kevin doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Kevin is just like the fans who send him the meme, “Oh, he think he on the team!” No, Kevin just can’t get it through his head that the Bloodline actually likes him! Jimmy likes Sami! They do the handshake! BET! And Jey… Uh… Well, they’re working on it. And most importantly, ROMAN likes Sami! Yeah! That’s why Sami gets invited to the locker room.

If you saw SmackDown, it was the four of them united that destroyed McIntyre! Jey tells Kevin if he doesn’t turn around and walk his ass back up the ramp, they’ll drop him like they did McIntyre! Fans boo and Kevin looks at the ramp. Kevin decides to go up the steel steps instead! Kevin tells Jey it doesn’t matter what they did to McIntyre. But Kevin cares what they did to him. Don’t think he forgot that Jey and Paul Heyman are the only reasons why Kevin didn’t beat Roman Reigns for the title at put an end to the reign 18 MONTHS ago! So Friday, you can celebrate 730 days for Roman, but you can also celebrate two years of having Jey’s head up his cousin’s ass!!

Sami tries to defuse things again. Here’s the thing. Kevin, Sami is trying real hard here to keep the peace. He doesn’t want problems. But the way Kevin is talking right now, he is begging for Jey to kick his ass. Jey steps to Kevin, and Kevin says, “Yeah? Y’know what, Jey? I think this is the part where we drop the microphones, get a referee out here, and just fight, isn’t it?” Fans fire up for that, because he comes a ref! Will KO give Jey payback for that screw job a year-and-a-half ago?

Kevin Owens VS Jey Usos w/ Jimmy Uso & Sami Zayn!

Raw returns and the bell rings. Kevin and Jey circle, tie up, and Kevin puts Jey in a corner. Jey turns it around, Kevin turns it back, but then Jey turns it back again. Kevin avoids the chop to CHOP and CLUB Jey! Kevin stomps Jey into the corner, the ref counts and Kevin lets off to tell Sami to “SUCK IT!” But Jey ROCKS Kevin with an uppercut! Jey throws hands but Kevin counter punches hard! Kevin CHOPS Jey and Jey flops out of the ring. Sami and Jimmy stay back as Kevin goes out, but Jey throws a body shot! Jey POSTS Kevin! Jey whips Kevin but Kevin reverses and Jey hits steel steps! The steps come apart!

Fans fire up as Kevin moves the steps around, but then puts Jey in the ring. Kevin throws hands, fires off in the corner, then lets off at 4. Kevin mocks Sami, Sami coaches Jey, but Kevin whips Jey corner to corner, Jey reverses and Kevin hits buckles hard! Sami and Jimmy applaud and Jey storms up on Kevin. Jey rains down fists, then shouts, “You think this is a game?” Jey ROCKS Kevin with a right! Jey brings Kevin up, whips corner to corner again and again Kevin hits buckles hard! Jey goes to the far corner and holds up the finger, #WeTheOnes. Jey runs in, but Kevin dodges the splash! Kevin then goes corner to corner to CANNONBALL!

Jey flops out of the ring again and Kevin hurries out after him. Kevin brings Jey around, reels him in, and aims for those steel steps! Jimmy shows superkick and Kevin storms up to him. Jimmy gets away, but Kevin turns around into Jey’s SUPERKICK! Jey then SAMOAN DROPS Kevin on the steps! Kevin writhes and Sami celebrates with Jimmy while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Jey has Kevin up top. Jey holds up the finger, fans boo, but Kevin resists the superplex! Kevin throws body shots, Jey hits back, but Kevin HEADBUTTS! Kevin hooks the leg, SUPER FISHERMAN BUSTER! Fans fire up while both men are down! Jimmy checks on Jey and Jey gets to the apron. Kevin crawls after Jey, drags him to a drop zone, and now Kevin climbs! Kevin reaches the top but Jey ROCKS him with an uppercut! Jey throws off the wrist tape, ROCKS Kevin again then climbs up after him. Kevin and Jey brawl up top, forearm for forearm, haymaker for haymaker! Kevin HEADBUTTS Jey, then ELBOWS him down!

Jey falls into the drop zone, Kevin adjusts to SWANTON BOMB!! Cover, TWO!! Jey survives after that long range shot! Kevin gets to ropes, and fans fire up as he and Jey stand. Kevin aims, kicks, but no Stunner! Kevin blocks the superkick to SUPERKICK back! Kevin whips Jey, POP-UP, but Jey slips out! SUPERKICK!! Jey puts Kevin in the drop zone, hurries up top, USO SPLASH!! Cover, TWO!?!? Kevin survives and Sami argues with the ref. The ref says that as close as it was, the count was fair! Jimmy coaches Jey and Jey drags Kevin to another drop zone. Jey goes back up, fans fire back up, USO SPLASH onto knees! Cradle, TWO!!

Kevin SUPERKICKS Jey, then SUPERKICKS Jimmy off the apron! Kevin goes up top and Sami freaks out! FROG SPLASH!! Cover, TWO!!! Jey survives and no one can believe it! But Sami is relieved that Jey is still in this. Jey bails out and Kevin goes out after him. Kevin reels Jey in, Sami says no! He knows what that will do. Kevin shoves Sami! Kevin dares Sami to do something, but Sami doesn’t get what Kevin is trying to get at. Jey DIVES onto Kevin!! Jey tells Jimmy and Sami to finish this! Get a chair! Get a chair?! YES, get a chair!! Sami goes to fetch a chair, Jimmy distracts the ref, and Jey puts Kevin on the ropes!

Jey wants Sami to hit Kevin! Sami hesitates, he is still Kevin’s friend. Sami refuses to use the chair so the ref spots him! Jimmy says Sami was supposed to hit him already! That was the plan! Jey turns around, into a STUNNER!! Cover, Kevin wins!!

Winner: Kevin Owens, by pinfall

Sami screws up not screwing Kevin over! Kevin gets some semblance of revenge, but which side is Sami really on?

 

Bayley, Dakota & Iyo speak.

“Bianca, you’re right. You have been holding it down since WrestleMania. As in, holding them back. And that’s why they need us to lift them up to bring this division back to life. And that starts this Saturday at Clash at the Castle, when we get rid of you, Alexa and Asuka. And pretty soon, everyone will be looking up at me again, The Role Model, while we all look down on you.” Dakota Kai says that doesn’t stop with Raw. They will take over the entire WWE! Tonight, Kai & Sky are in the finals of the tag title tournament. They won’t just say they’re in control, they’ll prove it! Raquel & Aliyah have beaten some of the best to get here, but it’ll hurt that much more when they’re sent back to SmackDown.

Iyo Sky adds in Japanese that this will be so amazing, and English, “We will rule Monday Night Raw as the NEW tag team champions!” Will the Genius of the Sky and #CobraKai raise those titles high overhead before heading for Cardiff?

 

The Miz is heading out!

Ciampa wants him to wait. He can’t be going home like this, but Miz says it’s fine. He’s fine. Ciampa accepts that and lets Miz get in his van. But Kevin Patrick rushes over! Miz tells him no, he doesn’t want to talk about it! Yes, but what was it that Miz saw during his match with Bobby Lashley? Miz just shuts his car door, but LUMIS IS IN THE BACK SEAT!!! Is Miz in even more trouble than last week?!

 

WWE Media catches up with Johnny Gargano.

What are his feelings about his return one week in? Last Monday meant everything to him. To hear that reaction, to hear the chants of “JOHNNY WRESTLING!” again, it gives him goosebumps just thinking about it. Because that isn’t just a fun nickname, wrestling is his life. And wrestling’s been out of his life for nine months. That’s the longest time he’s been out of the ring since he was 8 years old. Johnny Wrestling is excited to get back into arenas and do what he believes what he was put on this planet to do.

So (Austin) Theory didn’t ruin it for him? No. Honestly, Gargano was excited to see him. “Say what you want about that kid, but he’s like family to me.” Gargano sat back and watched, and is happy for all of Theory’s success, but it doesn’t surprise him. Theory has every genetic gift Gargano doesn’t have. That is why they were in NXT together. But success affects everyone differently. “You’re a different kind of winner when you start at the bottom.” Theory, given his gifts and who he knows, he didn’t have to start from the bottom. But Theory didn’t even contact Gargano once during those nine months, or even when the baby was born.

But wait! Theory sneaks up on Gargano. Theory says he’s just here to talk. Gargano’s the one that kicked him, after all. They sit back down, and Theory has a question. Why didn’t Gargano call Theory when he became US Champion? Or when he became the youngest Mr. Money in the Bank? Theory, you know why. Gargano was busy with the newborn baby! Oh, excuses, excuses. Baby Wrestling had to be fed and changed. All excuses to Theory. But maybe Gargano didn’t call Theory because he was jealous. Gargano was stuck at home, watching Theory compete at WrestleMania. Gargano was watching Theory become Mr. MITB.

But honestly, from Theory’s perspective, he excepted better. But it’s true: it is lonely at the top. Welcome to Raw, Johnny, and good luck. Because Gargano’s swimming with sharks now. Theory laughs his way off, but will that shark be the one swimming in waters too deep for him?

 

Vacated WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships Tournament Finals: Dakota Kai & Iyo Sky w/ Bayley VS Raquel Rodriguez & Aliyah!

After quite the rollercoaster of a tournament, we have finally reached the end! Bayley’s duo of Kai & Sky had the smoother ride, wiping out Dana Brooke & Tamina, then toppling Bliss & Asuka. As for Big Mami Cool and #Aliyah317, they overcame Shotzi & Xia, but had to power through Sonya & Natty. Will #CobraKai & the Evil Genius make their Grand Slam Champion Role Model proud? Or will the Bougie & Badass shock them all?

Raw returns as the SmackDown duo makes their entrance. The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and one way or another, we will see NEW WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions crowned!

Aliyah starts with Sky and they circle. They tie up, Aliyah headlocks, but Sky pulls hair and powers out. Aliyah RAMS Sky but Shy rebounds to run her over! Sky drags Aliyah to a jackknife cover, TWO and Aliyah sunset flips, TWO! Sky covers, TWO and Aliyah has it back in a ghost pin, TWO! Aliyah facelocks and brings Sky to the corner, tag to Raquel! They double whip, Aliyah does the splits and Raquel BOOTS Sky down! Cover, TWO! Raquel drags Sky up in a deadlift, but Sky victory rolls and STOMP 182! Tag to Dakota and Kai taunts Aliya before she hits a SCORPION KCIK! Sky hits a springboard missile dropkick! Cover, TWO!

Speaking of the beaten teams of Raw, Dana Brooke, Tamina, “Doudrop” Piper Niven and Nikki A.S.H. are all watching this match, as well as each other. Will they all be looking to immediately challenge the winners here? Dakota pushes Raquel around, drags her up, and whips, but Raquel blocks! Raquel runs Dakota over, tags Aliyah in and gives her a boost! ROCKET LAUNCHER CROSSBODY! Cover, TWO! Aliyah facelocks Dakota but she breaks free. Aliyah goes Matrix to dodge, then she hip tosses Dakota! Dakota bails out and Aliyah handsprings! Tag to Raquel and Aliyah builds speed! But Sky gets Kai out of the way then kicks Aliyah!

Kai RAMS Aliyah into steel steps! Raquel rushes out, and she pops Dakota up! SHOTEI from Sky, PENALTY KICK from Kai! Raquel goes down, then Kai whips Sky at Aliyah for a METEORA against the steps! The count is rising, Kai is in at 8! Raquel drags herself in at 9, but Bayley mocks Aliyah while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns once again and Kai tags Sky. They double whip Raquel and BOOT her, CHOP BLOCK her, then AX KICK! Sky tops it off with a basement dropkick! Cover, TWO! Bayley is frustrated but Raquel is alone as Aliyah is still down. Kai tags back in to SPIKE-RANA! Cover, TWO! Raquel is showing that toughness but Dakota kicks her around. Kai toys with Raquel, but Raquel shoves her away! Kai comes back, but no Code Breaker! Raquel tosses Kai, Sky tags in! Sky runs, but Raquel THROWS Sky at Kai!! Both of them are down and Raquel crawls for her corner. Aliyah isn’t there, so Raquel has to keep fighting.

Raquel blocks Sky’s punch, then the other, to then HEADBUT Sky! Raquel ROCKS Kai, BOOTS Sky, then ELBOWS Kai! Raquel SPLASHES Sky, then SPLASHES Kai! VADER BOMB onto Sky!! Cover, TWO!! Sky survives, and Raquel is remembering why Sky is also a top NXT Women’s Champion. Raquel drags Sky up, lifts, but Sky slips out to a CODE RED! Cover, TWO!! Raquel survives and Bayley is worried! Sky and Raquel glare at each other, Sky dodges to fire off boxing elbows! Sky fires off a flurry, then a SHOTEI! Sky runs, into a LARIAT!! Raquel hurries to drag Sky up, reel her in, but Kai distracts! Bayley pulls hair!!

Raquel goes down, Sky SPRINGBOARD STOMPS! Raquel flounders into a corner, Dakota goes Around the World to BOOT her down!! Sky then goes up top and jumps OVER THE MOONSAULT!! Cover, TWO?!?! Raquel survives and Bayley is furious! That can’t be right! And then here comes Bianca, Asuka & Alexa! They run Bayley off from ringside so that Kai & Sky are all on their own! And ALIYAH TAGS IN!! She then hides to trick Kai & Sky, they go after Raquel! KAI-ROPRACTOR! And a CRUCIFIX DRIVER! But Aliyah rolls Kai up!! ALIYAH & RAQUEL WIN!!

Winners: Aliyah & Raquel Rodriguez, by pinfall (NEW WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions)

Bianca, Alexa & Asuka return to celebrate with Raquel & Aliyah! Bayley is speechless, this was not how they wanted this to go, but now they must move on to Clash at the Castle! Will they get sweet revenge on Bianca, Alexa & Asuka in Cardiff? Or will things just keep falling apart for them?

As for the new champions, Aliyah finally has a title in the WWE, how hard will she and Raquel fight to hold onto these titles after waiting so long?


My Thoughts:

A great Raw, but I don’t know if the fans were as excited as they could’ve been for this go-home. We did get some great segments with the hometown hero, Kurt Angle. That was a hilarious interaction with Chad Gable, and I still say he should’ve been Angle’s illegitimate son when they did that story. But anyway, we also got a great tag match of Profits VS Alpha Academy, and of course Profits win. Great nod to Angle’s career with him bringing out the milk, and another one with Edge pulling off that signboard gag on Angle again. Judgement Day has a very good tag match opener with Styles & Ziggler, and wow, interaction between Styles and Finn after the Judgement Day turn!

But anyway, of course Judgement Day wins, and of course we get a match set for Clash at the Castle. I liked the standoff between Dom and Rhea, because it was clear it wasn’t just because of the WWE’s rule against co-ed (well, more male hitting female) aggression. Rhea definitely scares Dom, so between that and Dom being the third wheel in Rey’s reunion with Edge, there is a very good chance Dom turns on Rey and joins Judgement Day to bring this feud into the next phase. And there’s a very good chance Beth Phoenix gets even more involved after Clash to bring the feud to Extreme Rules or even Survivor Series.

Great stuff out of The Miz being paranoid about Lumis, and Lumis giving him reason to be paranoid. While Lumis ended up bros with Theory, there’s clearly something more predatory in Lumis’ obsession with Miz. Now, while it was clear Lumis was where Miz saw him, it is a bit silly they’re playing it like only The Miz saw him. Blurring of the lines of where kayfabe starts and stops seems to be a thing HHH & HBK right now, as NXT had a similar inconsistency in presenting Apollo Crews’ future sight. But as far as Raw goes, of course Miz’s fear cost him against Lashley, and then we got a great punctuation on the night with Lumis in the back of Miz’s SUV. I can’t wait to see where this goes next.

Great promo from Gargano and Theory to add to what we got last week and to further reference NXT for the sake of those who weren’t watching then. And those were good kayfabe details about them not being in touch with each other for nine months, it takes advantage of the lack of continuity Vince kept between RawDown and NXT. We also got some strong stuff between Rollins and Riddle. That preshow brawl was well done, they did crosstalk effectively, and they got really, really personal. The heat just got turned up, and that match is going to be a show-stealer. We also got a bit of a show-stealer out of Kevin, Sami and the Usos. Great promo and great match, Sami is very conflicted and that puts him in a bad spot with the Bloodline, this is getting really good.

Decent Six Woman Tag win for Bianca, Alexa & Asuka over jobbers, though I’m not even sure I got those names quite right since we were told them, not shown them in a graphic. And of course, we got awesome stuff for the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships. Kai & Sky had great teamwork, Raquel & Aliyah had great determination and grit. Good move for Bianca’s team to run Bayley off so she couldn’t keep helping, and what a surprise that Raquel & Aliyah won. At the same time, the math now works where Bayley’s team could win this Saturday to then earn Bayley that title shot against Bianca. And with all the other tag teams watching backstage, obviously Dana, Tamina, Nikki and Piper are going to go after Raquel & Aliyah for some great first feuds.

My Score: 8.5/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (4/26/24)

It’s Draft Day!

Published

on

And with the first overall pick of the 2024 WWE Draft, SmackDown selects…

The WWE Draft returns for 2024, the first four rounds being right here on Friday Night SmackDown! With champions protected, who ends up where to challenge them?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Rey Mysterio & Dragon Lee w/ Zelina Vega & Carlito VS Angel Garza & Humberto Carrillo; Rey & Dragon win.
  • Bron Breakker VS Cedric Alexander; Bron wins.
  • WWE Women’s Championship #1 Contender’s Match: Naomi VS Tiffany Stratton; No Contest.
  • Cody Rhodes VS Carmelo Hayes; Cody wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Backstage interview with Paul Heyman.

Kayla Braxton is with the Wise Man and says that here on night one of the Draft, there are already rumors circulating, including those about The Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns. Heyman will clarify these are not rumors regarding The Tribal Chief, Roman… Reigns. These are facts! Ladies and gentlemen, Your Tribal Chief, Roman Reigns, has voluntarily withdrawn from eligibility for this year’s Draft. That is not a negative but a positive. Who built SmackDown since the Pandemic? Roman Reigns. Who is the biggest star in the entire industry? Roman Reigns. Why would Roman Reigns hog the number one draft pick spotlight when he won’t be returning in the immediate future?

Read into his words, Kayla, that is not what a real Tribal Chief would do. Instead now, the pressure is on Nick Aldis. Because if Roman Reigns isn’t the first draft pick, then who is? The first two picks make history in a brand new era. And Heyman doesn’t know about you, but he is intrigued. No Tribal Chief up for grabs, who gets their opportunity to shine in the spotlight?

 

SmackDown throws it to the NXT Performance Center.

Jackie Redmond says the emotion down here is palpable! There is excitement, hope, and a little bit of nerves. But for these NXT Superstars, tonight is the culmination of a lifetime of hard work, dedication, a little bit of luck and a whole lot of self-belief. It was just last year that the NEW WWE Tag Team Champion, Grayson Waller, was hoping his name would be called. And it is funny this is NXT, but time to buy a vowel, throw in an E! Who is next? We find out tonight! The draft pool is deep, who rises to the top of the list?

 

Corey Graves is in the ring.

Corey welcomes Cincinnati and all of us at home to night one of the 2024 WWE Draft. Understandably, the GMs have their hands full, so Corey will be moderating the contract signing for the WWE Championship match that takes place next Saturday for Backlash: France. Without further ado, it’s the #1 contender, The Phenomenal AJ Styles! Styles makes his entrance, taking a seat at the table on camera right. And now, the Undisputed WWE Champion, the American Nightmare, Cody Rhodes! Cincy fires up and sings along, “WHOA~ OH~!” as Cody makes his entrance and gets his pyro before joining everyone in the ring.

Styles looks over the contract, absolutely tuning out the fans going wild for “CODY! CODY!” Styles then gets the mic to say before he signs, he doesn’t know if we realize that we’ve got two Georgia boys about to mix it up for the first time, and for the biggest prize in the game. Styles understands why they boo, but they gotta know that he doesn’t respect LA Knight, LA Knight got under his skin. He accepts that. But that’s why Styles lost at Mania. But what happened? Styles got his composure back and realized that he is Phenomenal. Styles BEAT Knight to earn the right to face Cody Rhodes at Backlash.

Now unlike Knight, Styles does respect Cody. They hadn’t crossed paths yet, but they’ve been down the same roads. They had to prove themselves outside of the WWE. And Styles is willing to believe that the same man who gave him advice a long time ago gave Cody the same advice, on how to stand on their own two feet and be the men they are today. That man was The American Dream, Dusty Rhodes. The fans cheer for “DUSTY! DUSTY!” Styles learned a lot from Dusty. Styles gets a little emotional thinking about Dusty, he was a good man. Dusty taught Styles how to carry himself, and to carry the weight of a championship.

And Styles looks at this WWE Championship here. The weight of this isn’t just the leather and gold. And at Backlash, we see if Cody can carry it. Styles goes back to his table, signs the contract, and then hands it off to Corey. Corey brings that to Cody, and Cody picks up his mic. “So… Cincinnati…! Whadda we wanna talk about? Certainly, we can talk about respect. There is not a locker room on Earth that you’ll find where everyone in it, every single person, they all respect AJ Styles. Last week, I went on to say you are the modern day Excellence of Execution. I respect the roads that you have traveled down to get here, the parallel paths that perhaps you and I have.

“Mutual respect, much respect. But that respect goes by the wayside at Backlash. I can feel it in your words to a degree. You’ve been here before. And it seems you’re implying that I cannot carry the weight of that championship. Well, good thing the man who trained me not far from where I sit now used to tell me all the time, it’s not about winning the title, it’s about keeping it.” The fans cheer that. Cody says boy does he respect Styles’ familiarity with Cody’s last name. But when you put C O D Y in front of it on this paper, that means they’ve never touched before. That means Backlash is a level playing field.

That means no matter how Phenomenal Styles is, this isn’t a dream match for Cody. It’s a must-win! Cody signs while the fans cheer, and it is official! Cody even throws the pen to the crowd as a free souvenir. Cody then offers a handshake, and Styles says y’know what? It was a beautiful thing to see Cody #FInishTheStory and win the title. But it’s a shame that Cody’s title reign will end at Backlash. Styles still shakes Cody’s hand, and then walks away. Cody picks up the belt and holds it high, will he get to hold it high again in Lyon, France?

Triple H is here!

Just as Cody was on his way to the back, The Game makes his way out here! HHH raises Cody’s hand, then invites him over to the podium. HHH welcomes us to the first round of the 2024 WWE Draft. It is a night that changes the landscape of the WWE going into the future, and things are a bit different this year. As the GMs ponder their next steps, they have to understand it is about protecting the roster they have as it is making the roster they want. Meaning that when they use their picks, they have just as much of a chance gaining a superstar as they do losing one they already have.

HHH just felt that since champs are protected and Cody will be staying here on SmackDown, maybe Cody could help read the SmackDown picks and HHH can read the Raw picks. And since SmackDown goes first, Cody reads first. Cody takes the card to say that with the first pick of the 2024 WWE Draft, SmackDown selects… The E S T, Bianca Belair! The stongEST, fastEST, roughEST, toughEST stays on Friday nights! HHH reads that for the second pick of the 2024 WWE Draft, Raw selects… YEET! JEY USO! Monday nights will still have Main Event Jey Uso! And the fans “YEET!” Cody says for the third pick, SmackDown selects… NXT’s Carmelo Hayes!

The fans fire up as SmackDown manages to snag… HIM! The former NXT Champion makes history again by being the first NXT superstar to be chosen this high in the Draft! HHH says that’s a hell of a pick. But then the fourth and final pick of this first round, Raw selects… SETH! FREAKIN’! ROLLINS! It is still going to be Monday Night Rollins as the Visionary stays on the red brand! Cody and HHH shake hands, and then Melo makes his way out! Melo has the mic to say when they talk about who’s next up, about who’s the hottest out, they don’t call them “the hottest out,” they just call him “Carmelo Hayes.”

The fans chant “WHOOP DAT TRICK!” to remind Melo how he’s leaving NXT. Melo says okay, okay. But then to Cody Rhodes, ever since Cody won the title, he’s been talking about “If you aim for the king, you best not miss.” Well, funny how that works. Because when Melo shoots, Melo don’t miss. And as a first round draft pick, what better way to shoot his shot on SmackDown than to shoot it right at Cody? Melo leaves the mic with Cody but Cody picks it up to say, “Fortune certainly favors the bold, but I dunno. You folks don’t wanna see me in action tonight, do ya?” The fans go wild! Oh, but what if Cody forgot his gear?

Oh that’s right! He didn’t forget his gear! And this title right here, for Cody, means absolutely 100%, Melo’s on! They shake on it, and we’re about to see a huge first-time-ever showdown! But will this bold first move work out for… HIM?

 

Rey Mysterio & Dragon Lee w/ Zelina Vega & Carlito VS Angel Garza & Humberto Carrillo!

The LWO is still not convinced Legado Del Fantasma had nothing to do with the beating that took the Boy Wonder out ahead of WrestleMania. Will the King of Lucha help get to the bottom of things? Or will Angel & “Berto” make it as easy as ABC, 1-2-3?

The teams sort out, Dragon runs up on Humberto but Humberto LARIATS him down! Humberto drags Dragon up, tears the shirt away and CHOPS! Humberto whips, Dragon ducks ‘n’ dodges to RANA! Humberto tumbles out, Dragon builds speed and FLIES! Direct hit and down goes Humberto! The fans fire up as Dragon pushes Humberto into the ring, goes up a corner, and then CROSSBODIES! Cover, TWO! Dragon facelocks to drag Humberto up, but Humberto wrenches out to CLUB Dragon down. Humberto waistlocks but Dragon throws elbows. Angel tags in as Humberto shoves Dragon. Dragon ducks but Angel holds ropes open, and Dragon tumbles to the floor!

The fans boo and LWO hurries to check on Dragon! Angel & Humberto just soak up the heat as SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and both Dragon and Humberto are down! They crawl, hot tags to Angel and Rey! The fans fire up as Rey ducks ‘n’ dodges and tilt-o-whirl RANAS! Angel ends up in a corner, he puts Rey on the apron, but Rey ROCKS Angel! Rey goes up to SEATED SENTON! Rey keeps moving, wrenches and kicks, then hops on! CODE RED! Cover, Humberto breaks it! The fans boo but Humberto hauls Rey up. Rey fights and RANAS Humberto up and out! But Angelo kicks, scoops, but Rey slips free! Angelo kicks low, reels REy in, and underhooks, but Rey fights those to RANA Angel onto ropes! Rey dials it up to 619!

Tag to Dragon and he takes aim! Angel stands, into the tilt-o-whirl, PROJECT DRAGON!! Cover, LWO wins!

Winners: Rey Mysterio & Dragon Lee, by pinfall

Carlito and Zelina hug it out with the team, but then Santos Escobar & Elektra Lopez walk out here. Santos says whoa, whoa, whoa, hold that celebration. Because Santos is many things, but a liar is not one of them. And when Santos said he did NOT attack Dragon that night before Mania, he meant it. Elektra has been working for weeks to track down the security footage from that night. And Rey… Oh, Rey. What you’re about to see, you will find very, very interesting. The footage plays, and it was CARLITO!! Carlito throw Dragon around backstage! No one can believe it, because of how well Carlito fooled even Dragno.

Speaking of, Carlito RAMS Dragon into Rey, then hits a BACKSTABBER! Never has that move’s name been more fitting! Carlito runs away in a panic, and Rey stands back up in a rage! Santos says he told Rey that he was right all along. They were supposed to be family, and yet look how that turned out. How will the LWO recover from this shocking development?

 

Bron Breakker VS Cedric Alexander!

The Big Bad Booty Nephew has been making a case for himself ever since showing up on SmackDown, and he’s already bringing the straps down! Is he going to break PRIMED Alexander while also breaking match time records? Or will Cedric prove he’s too fly for Bron?

The bell rings and Cedric dodges Bron to CHOP and ROCK! Cedric whips, Bron reverses and Cedric handsprings, into a SPEAR!! Cover, Bron wins!

Winner: Bron Breakker, by pinfall

Well, hard to say if that’s an all-time fast match, but that was a fast match! QR Code stuff going on, but will we all see Bron take the world by storm?

 

Nick Aldis heads out.

And waiting is Tiffany Stratton. She asks if he saw what she did last week. Wait, of course he did. Because she is the Center of the Universe. She dropped Naomi and Bayley, where is her title match? Aldis tells Tiff to look at his watch. It is NOT set to #TiffyTime. And he was this close to sending her to the back of the line. But then someone convinced him otherwise, good for her. Tonight, she goes 1v1 with Naomi again, and the winner faces Bayley for the title at Backlash. Whose stupid idea was that?! Bayley says DING DONG, it was hers. It is a win-win situation here. If Naomi wins, she gets the match she got cheated out of.

And if Tiff wins, then she’ll find out when she attacks the Role Model. Tiff gasps as she has a #TiffanyEpiphany. Bayley should be ringside for that match so she can see Tiff do what Bayley couldn’t, and that’s beat Naomi. Tootles. Tiff leaves, but will the only thing she gets is to #FeelTheGlow?

 

Michelle McCool and Torrie Wilson are here!

One is a former WWE Women’s Champion, the other is a WWE Hall of Famer, but they’re both here to present Draft picks! Michelle says with the first pick of the second round, SmackDown selects… The Viper, Randy Orton! SmackDown will still have to watch out for an RKO outta nowhere! Torrie says that with the second pick of the second round, Raw selects… BRON BREAKKER! We just saw Bron make quick work of opponents here on SmackDown, but now he’s gonna be rampaging on Raw!

Michelle says that with the third pick of the second round, SmackDown selects… NIA JAX! The Irresistible Force may have to change targets from the Women’s World to the Undisputed Women’s title, but will she be unstoppable all the same? And with the fourth and final pick of this round, Raw selects… LIV MORGAN! The Revenge Tour will still be part of Monday nights, will we watch Liv rise to the top?

 

The Bloodline arrives backstage.

Paul Heyman is there to greet them and open the door to the SUV. He apologizes for not being faster about that, but Solo Sikoa asks The Bloodline if they’ve been drafted. Not yet. Then give Solo the details. Okay, well, Roman Reigns withdrew right before the show began, and then Solo keeps adding members, so no one really knows what they’re getting if they draft The Bloodline! Solo sighs, and here comes Tama Tonga. Heyman asks they be patient but Solo wants Heyman to repeat that for him. Heyman gets scared, but then KEVIN OWENS jumps in! Kevin fires off on Tama, security and refs rush in to stop it!

The Prizefighter wants Solo’s “MFT” to bring the fight like he did last week! Security still drags Kevin away, but will he get that fight he wants?

 

Kayla Braxton is on stage.

SmackDown returns and Kayla welcomes us back to the show. And please welcome out the first overall pick, Bianca Belair! The fans fire up as The EST walks out on stage, and Kayla congratulates her on being the first overall pick. But let’s talk Backlash. Breaking news, Bianca and Jade Cargill are going to challenge for the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships, against the Kabuki Warriors. How satisfying would it be to dethrone them on the stage of this magnitude? Bianca says so satisfying. She really hopes Jade gets drafted to SmackDown because given all this history with Damage CTRL, all the partners by her side, Bianca has never been the one to finally end it with them.

For everything they’ve done to her and this division, Bianca feels Jade is the perfect woman to help her end this. Now, DMG CTRL is falling apart piece by piece, and that final piece is the tag titles. So once Bianca & Jade take the gold at Backlash, the Kabuki Warriors won’t even have a reason to come back to SmackDown. But wait, they’re here now! Asuka & Kairi walk out here and Kayla moves aside. The Empress of Tomorrow and the Pirate Princess taunt the EST, but here comes The Storm! Jade makes her way to stand right by Bianca’s side. The four shout and argue, but this will be settled on May 4th!

WHOA! Tama and Kevin are brawling their way out here! The ladies move aside so the gentlemen can brawl all the way down to ringside! Tama hits low, gets in the ring, but Kevin pursues! Kevin TACKLES Tama, but Solo CLOBBERS Kevin! The fans boo as The Bloodline beats Kevin down! The refs hurry out here but clearly Solo’s Bloodline won’t listen! Tama DECKS producers, DECKS guards, HEADBUTTS them, throws hands and even THROWS the guards! Tama and Solo beat Kevin down again, but here comes Randy Orton! The Viper is still on SmackDown and he’s still pals with Kevin, so here he comes!

Orton DECKS Tama, fires hands on Solo, then RK- NO, Solo gets free and gets away! Orton wants to pursue, almost runs Jamie Noble and refs over to do it, but the Bloodline has gotten away! The fans cheer Randy on, and KAevin even hugs him! But then Kevin and Randy try to give chase! Security stops this, when and where will we see #RKKO strike down Solo and Tama?

 

The Dudley Boyz are here!

The fans fire up as Bubba Ray & D-Von are both here for the next round of picks! Cincy chants for “E C DUB! E C DUB!” Bubba and D-Von look at the cards, it’s hard to read. So out come the glasses! Bubba says with the first pick of the third round of the 2024 WWE Draft, SmackDown selects… L A KNIGHT! YEAH!! The Mega Star stays on Fridays! D-Von says with the second pick of the third round, Raw selects… RICOCHET! Mondays still has the One and Only, is Ricochet going to bring that WWE Speed Championship home to Raw, too?

Bubba says with the third pick of the third round, SmackDown selects… THE BLOODLINE! That means Solo Sikoa, Tama Tonga and Paul Heyman are staying right here on Friday nights. And D-Von says with the final pick of this round, Raw selects… SHEAMUS! The Celtic Warrior just got back, but he won’t have to worry about going anywhere else but Monday nights.

 

WWE Women’s Championship #1 Contender’s Match: Naomi VS Tiffany Stratton!

It’s time to run it back once again! The Glow got robbed by the Spoiled Rich Girl, but supposedly, it’s #TiffyTime. Will Naomi prove there’s no such time on the clock? Or will Bayley be the one feeling the Backlash over giving Tiffany one more chance?

The bell rings and Naomi hits a THESZ PRESS! Naomi rains down fists, Tiffy shoves her away and goes to ropes, but Naomi gets up in Tiff’s face. Naomi whips, Tiff holds ropes to bail out and fans boo. Naomi scowls, runs in and WRECKS Tiff with a dropkick! Naomi then gets Tiff up, SMACKS her off the apron, and then SMACKS her off it again! And again! Naomi puts Tiff in, goes up a corner, but Tiff gets under the jump! Naomi runs back up but Tiff YANKS her into ropes! Tiff runs to HIP ATTACK! Naomi sputters, Tiff scowls and drags Naomi up, to then put through ropes. But Naomi RAMS into Tiff!

Naomi reels Tiff in, for a HEATSEEKER! Tiff flops to the floor, and then Naomi SPLIT LEG DROPS! Naomi says it’s #NaomiTime, but SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and Naomi runs, but into a SPINEBUSTER! High stack, TWO! Naomi survives and Tiff is frustrated but the fans rally up. Tiff drags Naomi up, whips her to a corner, but Naomi goes up and sunset flips! TWO! Tiff escapes, knees Naomi low, then whips. Naomi slides under the lariat to then mule kick! Then she headscissor SPIKES Tiff down! Cover, TWO! Tiff survives but barely, and Naomi keeps her cool. Naomi headlocks, but Tiff shoves her into buckles! Tiff runs, but Naomi follows, DOUBLE RUNNING FACEBUSTERS take them both down! The fans fire up as the two rise!

Naomi KICKS, ROCKS and ROCKS Tiff again! Naomi fires shots again and again but Tiff knees low! Tiff reels Naomi in, but Naomi wrenches out to ENZIGIRI! And then BUCKLE BULLDOG! But then NIA JAX attacks Bayley!? Nia SMACKS Bayley off buckles, rains down fists, and this momentarily distracts Naomi. Naomi refocuses, but by now, Tiff’s slipped away! Nia KICKS Bayley in the side, so Naomi goes out to ROCK her! Nia POSTS Naomi and that throws the match out!

No Contest

The fans boo as Nia ruins the fun, then runs Bayley over! Nia smiles as she blows kisses to Cincy. Tiff smiles, she drags Naomi up and puts her in the ring. Then she drags Bayley in! Tiff wants a repeat of last week as she puts them side by side in the drop zone! Tiff then goes up and up for the PRETTIEST MOONSAULT EVER!! Tiff says it’s her time, but the #1 contendership is still in question. Who gets their shot at the Role Model at Backlash?

 

B-Fab and the Street Profits meet up backstage.

Angelo Dawkins has a “WHO-DEY” sign, but Montez Ford is wondering where Bobby Lashley is right now. B-Fab says calm down, he’ll be here. Byron Saxton walks over and apologizes for interrupting. He doesn’t know what the Draft destination for this group will be until Monday Night Raw, but we do know that The Profits will challenge A-Town Down Under for the WWE Tag Team Championships. YESSIIIIIIR~! B-Fab says it doesn’t matter where they get drafted. The Profits are going to take down A-Town Down Under and take those titles. Then they’ll have their first class tickets right back to SmackDown.

SmackDown? Did someone say SmackDown~? In walk Austin Theory & Grayson Waller, showing off the titles. And Theory says you can’t have SmackDown without the GREATEST undefeated tag team of all time. And sorry, Dawkins, but these are championships, something the Bengals know nothing about! B-Fab keeps Dawkins back, but then in steps Bobby Lashley! The All Mighty scares Theory & Waller right off, and Dawkins says see y’all next Friday! Will there be nothing keeping these Profits down the night before Backlash?

 

The Final Testament speaks.

Karrion Kross says good evening. What’s going on here? You guessed it! More random acts of violence! Just follow him. Kross & Scarlett lead the way to show The Authors of Pain beating down New Catch Republic! Rezar beats down Pete Dunne while Akam victimizes Tyler Bate! Paul Ellering says they will know about sacrifice! Kross says whether they get drafted to Raw or stay on SmackDown, the violence will continue until they get what they want! So sayeth The Final Testament!!

 

Teddy Long and JBL are here!

The Hall of Famer General Manager and the Hall of Famer WWE Champion are both here, ready to give us the fourth and final round of picks tonight! Teddy gets right to it! The first pick of the fourth round, SmackDown selects… AJ STYLES! The Phenomenal One is really an obvious choice, because one way or another, the WWE Championship stays with SmackDown! JBL says the second pick of the fourth round, Raw selects… THE ALPHA ACADEMY! Raw keeps Chad Gable, Otis, Maxxine Dupri & Akira Tozawa, A THANK YEW~!

Teddy says with the third pick of this round, SmackDown selects… ANDRADE! A big move as now El Idolo will be part of Friday nights. And with the final pick of this fourth round, Raw selects… NXT’S Kiana James! The Calculator, the former NXT Women’s Tag Team Champion, has the Raw hat to put on, and after a quick hype package, Jackie Redmond is there to interview her. Kiana, congratulations! You are heading to Monday Night Raw! How much does this mean to her? This means the world to her. She is filled with gratitude, but also knows every decision she has made up to this point has been by design to get her here.

Kiana is so proud of her time in NXT, but she’s ready to show Raw why she is the One Percent. Was she surprised? Of course she was! HBK is here to wish her luck and congratulations. Is Kiana going to start the hostile takeover of the Raw Women’s Division?

 

Backstage interview with Nick Aldis.

Kayla is with the SmackDown GM and says that with night one in the books, how does he feel about SmackDown’s selections? He feels really good about them. SmackDown’s future is bright, he can’t wait for the new recruits to show up and show out for the blue brand. But he also wants to turn attentions to Backlash, because he’s got some new matches to announce! The first PLE in France, this is exciting stuff, Kayla. Aldis says that the WWE Women’s Championship will now be on the line in a Triple Threat! Bayley VS Naomi VS Tiffany Stratton! Will the odds make it that much harder for the Role Model to succeed?

There’s one more match to announce, but Aldis will let the GM GOAT take it from here. Teddy Long steps in, and don’t forget. We’ll talk about this tag team match. The Bloodline VS Kevin Owens & Randy Orton! Holla, players. Solo & Tama will have to face The Viper and the Prizefighter, will #RKKO strike fast and strike hard?

 

Cody Rhodes VS Carmelo Hayes!

The American Nightmare just put pen to paper for his match with the Phenomenal One, but he isn’t one to shy away from a challenge. The former NXT Champion is shooting his shot, but will this be nothing but net? Or will it be a frustrating airball?

The bell rings and the two circle. They tie up, the fans rally for Cody as he puts Melo in a corner then arm-drags him away. Melo runs up, Cody headlocks, Melo powers out then drops. Melo hurdles, but Cody kicks low to RHODES UPPERCUT! Melo staggers to ropes, the fans fire up, but then melo throat chops and springboard FLYING LARIATS! Melo says that’s why he’s a first round pick! But then Cody CLOBBERS him! Cody asks if Melo’s ready for this, and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns once again and Cody has a headlock. Cody hits a takeover, Melo flails and kicks around, but Cody grinds him down. Melo pushes with his forearm, then headscissors, but Cody kips free. Melo CHOPS, the fans “WOO~!” but Cody brushes himself off. Melo pie faces Cody! Cody fires forearms on Melo, then whips, but Melo reverses. Melo ELBOWS Cody, then runs up to KICK him in the side! Melo fires forearms and CHOPS in a corner, then throws body shots. Melo digs his boot in, the ref counts, and Cody goes to another corner. Cody eggs Melo on, Melo storms up, but Cody puts him in the corner to CHOP!

Cody swings, Melo dodges and CHOPS! Cody turns things around to CHOP! The fans rally, Cody whips corner to corner, then he back drops Melo away! Melo staggers up, Cody runs, and he rallies on Melo with forearms! Cody goes up and over in a corner but Melo tilt-o-whirls, LA MYSTICA! Melo springboards, FADE AWAY! Cover, TWO! Cody survives that flying DDT, but we see the NXT roster all fired up watching Melo take it to the champ. Melo sits Cody up, drags him into a facelock, but the fans rally for Cody. Cody fireman’s carries but Melo slips free to dragon sleeper! Melo grins, but Cody cradles! TWO!!

Melo swings, Cody boots, then Cody springboards to BEAUTIFUL DISASTER! Melo flips inside-out, Cody covers, TWO! Melo is still in this and he snarls up at Cody. Melo gives a forearm, Cody gives it back, and the fans rally up. Cody scoops Melo, storms around, and then hits a RUNNING POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO! Melo survives and Cody grows frustrated. Cody pounds the mat, the fans rally up, and then Cody goes to ropes. Cody springboards again, CODY CUTTER! Cover, TWO!! Melo survives yet again, proving why he’s a former NXT Champion, on top of NXT North American Champion! But then Cody drags him up!

Cody back suplexes, Melo lands out of it, then FIRST 48! Doe goes Cody and Melo goes up! Melo is setting up for the game winner! NOTHING BUT- NO, Cody avoids the flying leg drop! Melo rolls through, Cody dodges to SUPERKICK! Cody brings Melo around, but Melo gets free! They both run, both springboard, but completely miss each other, and Cody takes a rough landing! Melo drags Cody up, reels him in, but Cody wrenches out to dragon sleeper! CROSS RHODES!! Cody shakes out the bad arm but still makes the cover, and Cody wins!

Winner: Cody Rhodes, by pinfall

Melo took his shot but it was blocked! Even so, Cody sits Melo up to show him respect and tell him he’s still the future. But did this match end up more of a trap game for Cody after that crash landing? Or will he be alright in time for Backlash and his phenomenal opponent?

Speaking of, Styles sneaks right into the ring! Cody sees him in time and Styles stays back. Cody and Styles stare down, but Styles says it was that close. Styles offers a handshake, and Cody takes it. There’s still respect here, for now. But will nothing stop Styles from turning Cody’s story into a tragedy after all?


My Thoughts:

A great SmackDown to open the WWE Draft but to also set up Backlash. To recap, SmackDown took Bianca, Melo, Orton, Nia, LA Knight, The Bloodline, Styles and Andrade while Raw took Jey, Rollins, Bron, Liv, Ricochet, Sheamus, The Alpha Academy, and Kiana. Many of those choices made sense, as picks won’t be wasted on keeping champions on brands, and just need to be used to keep most stories alive and change up a few others. Kiana is perhaps one of the more surprising moves, but well-deserved. She has been a solid character and solid in-ring performer almost from the start, she’s a solid addition to Raw.

Bron of course demolished his opponent tonight, it’s just a shame it was Cedric and not local enhancement talent. But Bron will also be a good addition to Raw, but maybe he can move past his squash match phase and get right to story. Melo being a first round pick was great stuff, and he had a great promo with Cody to give us tonight’s main event. That double springboard whiff was definitely a timing problem, but at the same time, a Fade Away countered into a Cody Cutter would’ve been way too epic just for TV. Cody with a great win, and we got a really good contract signing segment, but you can bet Cody retains.

Really good tag match from LWO VS Legado but naturally Rey & Dragon won. I knew it was only a matter of time before Carlito was outed, and how he handled being exposed was pretty good. And with Andrade being drafted to SmackDown, you just know that means Andrade joins the LWO. The Final Testament attacking New Catch Republic was a wild moment, I almost thought Ellering was going to use the pliers in his hands to grab at fingers. Maybe we get that next week for SmackDown in France. Good promos from A-Town Down Under and the still technically unnamed faction of Bobby Lashley’s. As great as The Profits are, it feels like Theory & Waller will cheat to retain.

Really good promo with Tiff and Bayley to set up Naomi VS Tiff round 3, but I did not think Nia Jax would disrupt all that. A Triple Threat at Backlash is good stuff, it will protect Bayley if she loses, but can also protect Naomi and Tiff if Bayley uses them against each other to win. Good promo from Bianca that then turned into the shouting match of Bianca & Jade with Kabuki Warriors. Their tag title match is official, and I’m pretty sure Bianca & Jade win. I also liked that this segment ended up having Kevin and Tama brawl right through it. Orton saving Kevin was a great move, RKKO VS Solo & Tama is going to be awesome stuff, I can’t wait to see it.

My Score: 8.8/10


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 4.25.2024

We just got done with Rebellion, and Under Siege is two weeks away! Gotta see how these dots connect!

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Rebellion had quite a few returns, Mike Santana, Sami Callihan and Broken Matt Hardy. All three of these guys could easily be main event players, and its nice to mix up and expand what felt like a rather small pool of potential challengers.

Under Siege is only like 2 weeks out, so we’ll see how the dots connect in such a short period of time.

Ratings:

  • Mike Santana vs Myron Reed w/Trey Miguel & Zachary Wentz: Santana wins via Spin the Block – ** 1/2
  • #1 Contender: Frankie Kazarian vs Josh Alexander: Josh wins via Grapevine Ankle Lock – ***
  • ASH by Elegance vs Xia Brookside: Xia wins via School Girl Roll-Up – ** 3/4
  • Sami Callihan vs The Good Hands: Sami Callihan wins via Cactus Driver ’97 – SQUASH
  • Eddie Edwards w/Alisha Edwards & Brian Myers vs Nic Nemeth: Eddie wins via Boston Knee Party – *** 1/4

Results:

A weird opening that is just framed to put Nemeth and Hardy together against The System. Feels a little awkward, but who knows how it will play out. 

Mike Santana vs Myron Reed w/Trey Miguel & Zachary Wentz

Ahh I didn’t really pay attention to Santana’s theme at Rebellion, but its pretty damn cool. Good stuff. 

Rascalz blindside Santana early, but the heel advantage doesn’t last more than a few moves. Santana whips Myron from corner to corner, hits a few Hip Attacks before Myron finally dodges one and starts using his unique offense and agility to his advantage. Matrix dodge, into an Leaping Outside Back in Slingshot Codebreaker. Some more offense and Santana powders to the ramp, Myron jumps over the rope and tries a Flying Cutter, but Santana blocks it, turns things around, gets pushed forward and hits the Rolling Cutter. Santana takes out the Rascalz, heads back into the ring, Myron tries to catch him unawares but eats the Spin the Block off the rope run! Santana wins fairly quickly.

Maclin’s music hits, he tries to employ the help of The Rascalz to attack Santana, but as soon as Maclin positions himself to get in, The Rascalz bail and flip off Maclin. Maclin makes it out of the confrontation relatively unscathed, but at least we know where he’s going for Under Siege probably.

OH FUCK ME WITH RUSTY KNIVES. Because Cardona is hurt Kon is paired with SDL, and she just challenges Jordynne and PCO to a tag match. WHY!? STOP IT. This is hot garbage. 

Josh Alexander comes out…I wonder who’s Super Finisher he’s gonna conveniently kick out this time? Brian Myers? Frankie Kazarian? Rich Swann? Because yes, I’m still annoyed that Hammerstone has been in TNA for half a sandwich, he already connects with a Super version of his finish on tacks, and that’s not a finish. Oh Kaz’s music hits. Okay, so time for Josh to kick out of Fade to Black or Flux Capacitor. Kaz talks smack, says he won his match too so he should have a say in who’s number one contender. Josh challenges him, Kaz says not right now, but a referee runs out and says the match is official. 

#1 Contender: Frankie Kazarian vs Josh Alexander

Kaz throws his jacket on Josh’s head, and attacks him with some strikes before Josh fights back and throws Kaz out. Commercial break, we see Kaz misses his Apron Guillotine, Josh goes for the Low Crossbody but Kaz dodges and Josh goes flying. Kaz starts throwing some chops and claws at the cauliflowered ears of Josh. Russian Leg Sweep from Kaz for a near fall. Josh swings wildly and Kaz ducks the strike and levels Josh with a Lariat.

Josh blocks a Vertical Suplex attempt, but Frankie pulls off a Fisherman’s Suplex after a few overhead strikes for a near fall. Josh stands up and connects with a straight right, rocks Kaz, Back Body Drop, into a Charging Forearm, Rolling Senton, 2 count! C4 Spike attempt countered into a Back Stabber and then Chicken Wing, but Josh fights it off, rolls through and into an Ankle Lock, Kaz kicks off and into a Head and Arm Cradle for a near fall and then the Guillotine Leg Drop into Slingshot DDT spot from Kaz for another 2 count!

Fade to Black, but its fought off, Big Boot but then Kaz counters the next move with a Power Slam into the Springboard Guillotine Leg Drop, but Josh grabs the Ankle Lock! Locomotion German Suplex time from Josh, Halfhatch Suplex after the Germans, floats over for a 2 count! C4 Spike attempt again, but Kaz fights it off, dumps him over the top rope, slingshots him in and into the Cutter for a near fall for Kaz! After the 2 Kaz grabs a chair and chain, the referee stops the chair of course, so he tries the chain, EY runs down and grabs the chain so Kaz pulls the Eddie Guerrero and the referee admonishes EY, but doesn’t DQ Josh. So as Kaz is busy laughing at EY, Josh picks the ankle, Ankle Lock with the Grapevine, Kaz taps.

ASH by Elegance vs Xia Brookside

Both are jawing at each other and then throw hands before Xia gets the upper hand with a Headscissors from the Top Turnbuckle, Charging Knees, a Flurry of Kicks, but when the ref forces some space in the corner, ASH is finally able to dodge and work over Xia with her Twisting Body Splash, a few choking moves, a corner Stomp into a Snap Suplex for 2. ASH is in charge elegantly, but the referee keeps forcing space on both of them when they go for corner attacks. Xia manages to take advantage a little, but ASH regains control, kicks Xia up the ramp and then lands her Cartwheel Back Elbow up the ramp. It actually looks pretty cool executed like that.

Headlocks and Hair Pulling to keep Xia down and using energy to kick out. ASH is getting frustrated but Xia is remaining persistent. ASH goes back to the Headlock, but Xia fights up, Jawbreaker, Back Elbow, Kick to the gut and Drop Toe Hold sends ASH face first into the middle buckle. Xia rips off 4 Double Knee Smashes to the back of ASH’s head into her Flying Crossbody for a close 2! Xia pulls her up, but ASH spins out, then Xia slips it, but ASH kicks her in the chest and deposits her to the outside and demands a count from the referee. Iceman puts Jeweled Knuckles/Rings on ASH’s hand, the referee catches her, removes the stuff from her fingers and Xia hits the School Girl Roll-Up for the flash win.

Sami Callihan vs The Good Hands

So the Good Hand Jobs are about to do their job to Sami. I’m just gonna assume Sami beats the hell out of both and wins with a Cactus Driver ’97. If anything interesting happens I might actually cover it, but come on now.

Kaz makes a Metallica reference with the “Wash Your Back So You Won’t Stab Mine”…and Sweet Amber is the only good song on St. Anger. So…I ain’t mad.

Eddie Edwards w/Alisha Edwards & Brian Myers vs Nic Nemeth

A little early ground wrestling and headlocks for control from both men. Nothing super flashy to start until we get to the rope run and Nemeth goes for the Flying Body Press to drop Eddie. Before Nemeth can follow up, Lish grabs his foot. Nic does have his brother Ryan in the crowd, trying to get chants going and do the old school ‘power up the babyface’ thing, but Eddie has been in control since Lish got involved. Simple offense, chokes, strikes, Snap Suplexes, Knee Drops, simple yet effective. But then Eddie ducks his head too early, Nemeth kicks him in the face, bounces his head off the buckles a few times, Dropkick sends Eddie reeling to the corner, Nemeth starts the 10 Count Punches but Myers hits the apron to distract and Eddie manages to slip the situation and push Nemeth to the floor.

Commercial break happens, Nemeth is trying to fight back with Chops, but a Kitchen Sink from Eddie puts Nemeth on the floor again! Clubbing blow from Eddie, but Eddie then misses the Hip Attack in the corner and Nemeth counters with the Rude Awakening into the 10 Count Rain of Elbows. Fame Ass-er miss, Eddie tries something but Nemeth turns it into that hesitation DDT for 2! Tuning up the band starts to build and Eddie powders to avoid it. Nemeth throws Eddie back in, goes to the top, but Eddie crotches him, rises up and hits the Superplex into Tiger Driver for 2! Eddie starts mocking with Tuning Up the band but Nemeth hits his own Superkick into an Olympic Slam for 2!

Both men just trade strikes Fighting Spirit style, Eddie says “Always Trust the System” and Nemeth shuts him up with a Headbutt. Danger Zone is blocked, Boston Knee Party gets ducked, they level each other with Lariats! Myers and Ryan Nemeth start fighting to distract the referee, Moose hits the ring and hits Nemeth with the belt. Eddie lands Boston Knee Party and The System wins again!

 

Overall Score: 6/10

A lame opening segment, a squash match, ASH by Elegance getting her first loss, and a weird way of just pulling the number one contender out of mid air makes for an awkward show. Also Kon still be involved in, literally anything, is negative. However, I can say there was a ton of stuff thrown at the wall this episode, so there’s a chance that some things landed better with other people than myself. The ballot segments were amusing, they overused the “I need to talk to you Santino” gimmick a bit much and personally I feel like having Jake versus Hammerstone is booking yourself into a weird corner.

But hey, the main event was fun, Nemeth getting laid out to the point that there could be a story reason to take him out of the Under Siege match. Kaz with the Metallica reference was pop worthy and I guess its a lot of ‘let’s see where it goes’ kind of angle creation. So it wasn’t complete trash, but its definitely a wait and see episode.


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