Andrew’s IMPACT Results & Match Ratings: 12.15.2022

So we come off of a nearly 60 minute Broadway, that will go down in IMPACT history as one hell of moment. Speedball and Josh Alexander beat the hell out of each other, and it definitely did a damn good job at giving IMPACT some IWC buzz. How do they follow up last week’s main event?

We kick off with the match that was supposed to be last week’s main event, Eddie Edwards versus Delirious! We also get…a whole different Taylor Wilde apparently.

.@RealTaylorWilde!?#IMPACTonAXSTV pic.twitter.com/Y5puiEzCW6

— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) December 16, 2022

Ratings:

• Eddie Edwards vs Delirious: Eddie wins via Cradle Counter – ***
• Bully Ray vs John Skyler: Bully wins via Piledriver – Squash
• Major Players (Brian Myers & Matt Cardona) vs Decay (Black Taurus & Crazzy Steve): Major Players win via Tandem Neckbreaker – **
• Angels w/The Design vs Sami Callihan: Sami wins via Cactus Driver ’97 – ** 1/4
• Bhupinder Gujjar & Joe Hendry vs Zicky Dice & Johnny Swinger: Gujjar wins via Dumbass Spear – * 1/2
• IMPACT World Tag Team Championships: Motor City Machine Guns vs Heath & Rhino (c): MCMG wins via Victory Roll – *** 3/4 – TITLE CHANGE!!!

Results:

Eddie Edwards vs Delirious

To note, Eddie came out to the Honor No More music.

A simple collar & elbow tie up, with Eddie pushing Delirious into the corner and giving a clean break sets up an oddly slow pace. A few quick headlock takedowns almost make me a liar at the pacing, until it turns into a standoff moment. Roll throughs, School Boy, Backslide, a bit of counter chain wrestling but there’s still a very deliberate pace.

Delirious tries to get some momentum going with the rope runs but Eddie hits the Manhattan Drop into a big Lariat to knock Delirious down. Eddie gets the wrist control and starts the short arm chops, Delirious eventually no sells one, Eddie tries for a Suplex but Delirious counters with his own Snap Suplex. Misdirection rope running from Delirious as he hits a Clothesline to give Delirious a moment to capitalize on before Eddie Superkicks Delirious in half.

Eddie grabs Delirious, Delirious tries a combo, but Eddie hits a little Kobashi/Misawa tandem with a Lariat into a Tiger Suplex. Delirious counters the pinfall attempt into a Cobra Stretch, but Eddie turns it into a pinning predicament and picks up the win.

Delirious offers the hand, Eddie looks to be playing nice, but attacks Delirious and lands the Die Hard Driver. Yuya Uemura comes out to make the save, but Eddie shuts down the attempted save. Eddie is trying to de-mask Delirious but Jonathan Gresham’s music hits to save Delirious from being embarrassed further. Eddie jaws with Gresham, but powders out without throwing hands with the Octopus. 

.@Walking_Weapon is beyond ready for @bullyray5150 at #HardToKill! @ScottDAmore @THETOMMYDREAMER #IMPACTonAXSTV pic.twitter.com/9gWFmdMKAG

— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) December 16, 2022

Bully Ray vs John Skyler

After a little bit of a stare down, a triplicate of Scoop Slams, Sitout Piledriver and Skyler is dead.

Dreamer’s music hits and he comes down after the 60 second match. Dreamer says their friendship is over because Bully made him look dumb. Bully seems unaffected, but then he grabs a mic. Bully takes the time to run down Dreamer, calls him a jealous coward, and that Bully was always a bigger star than Dreamer. Calls Dreamer a failure and keeps running him down. 

The ECW Dusty starts crying and recounting things, talking about scars he left on Bubba and mental health he deals with before trying to goad Bully into a match, but Bully just grins and walks off. 

Major Players (Brian Myers & Matt Cardona) vs Decay (Black Taurus & Crazzy Steve)

As Decay comes down, Trey Miguel attacks Steve and spray paints him before the match starts. Steve obviously is going to want to continue the match, but this obviously sets up for Decay losing but not getting too heavily injured as a team because of the interference.

Taurus wrestles circles around Cardona, Cardona tags in Myers, but Taurus keeps some momentum going. A few lucha moves into a Reverse Slingblade sends Myers powdering, Cardona tries to attack but Taurus drops him too. Taurus with the Tope con Hilo onto the Major Players, as Steve is still in pain on the apron while we go to commercial. Out of commercial, the Major Players are working over Taurus.

An Escalera Backflip gives Taurus the chance to tag in Steve, simultaneous tags and Steve is working over Cardona. Corner Roll into a Flatliner gives Steve a near fall, since Myers breaks it up. Myers takes out Taurus with the low blow kick to the ropes. Tandem Avalanche Neckbreaker from the Major Players takes out Steve for the win.

.@MickieJames and @JordynneGrace are face to face to sign the dotted line and make their history-making match at #HardToKill official! #IMPACTonAXSTV pic.twitter.com/94OOuCXk6X

— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) December 16, 2022

Angels w/The Design vs Sami Callihan

Bell rings and Angels charges right into a Pop-Up Powerbomb. Angels powders as Deaner observes and Kon stands in the way of a potential dive. Angels attacks from behind, gets a few shots before the T-Bone Suplex sends Angels ass over tea kettle into the corner. Callihan catches Angels Baseball Slide in the apron and works over the former Dork Order minion.

Minion fights off the Piledriver on the apron, Angels also gets out of a Death Valley Driver, Kon slams the apron to distract Sami as Angels charges forward driving Sami down with a Running STO. Sami is laughing off the Angels offense, a little counter play as Angels hits some kid of Armbar Side Effect that he turns into a Crossface submission. Rolling Elbow from Angels is met by an Elbow of Sami’s own, Brainbuster for 2. Strike exchange, Sole Butt from Angels, more exchanges, Angels tries a Lariat but it bounces off Sami and Sami drops Angels. Discus Lariat from Angels, Frog Splash for 2.

Angels gonna fly again, another Frog Splash finds nothing, Cactus Driver ’97 and that’s all she wrote.

Post match beat down gives The Design a measure of revenge. 

.@GiseleShaw08 wants the Knockouts World Tag Team Championships!@TheJaiVidal @DeonnaPurrazzo #IMPACTonAXSTV pic.twitter.com/iDh47sAKly

— IMPACT (@IMPACTWRESTLING) December 16, 2022

Bhupinder Gujjar & Joe Hendry vs Zicky Dice & Johnny Swinger

Zicky and Hendry start off and Hendry doesn’t look amused at all after he just Scoop Slams Zicky and Zicky looks for the tag out immediately. Swinger feeds into Hendry, Hendry hits a Stalling Vertical Suplex and Gujjar tags himself in as Zicky tags back in.

Moose jumps the barricade and goes after Joe Hendry, but Hendry avoids Moose and then grabs a mic and we see Hendry trying to talk Moose down as he retreats to the back with Moose in tow. Gujjar fights against both Zicky and Swinger, Ripcord Knee, Stupid Spear, and Gujjar wins.

IMPACT World Tag Team Championships: Motor City Machine Guns vs Heath & Rhino (c)

Heath starts but Rhino wants to kick things off for a change, so we kick off with Shelley and Rhino. Rhino uses a little quick power, but Shelley tries to twist and spin his way into an advantage, but Rhino is just to big to budge early on. Knife Edge Chops from Shelley just piss off Rhino, Rhino tackles down Shelley and Rhino WOOs after eating the chops.

Redhead Rebel tags in, but Sabin also gets tagged quickly and we see some counter chain wrestling. MCMG keep trying to be small and technical, while the champs have been a little more power based and refusing to get sucked into a chain wrestling match. Bow and Arrow into a Sliding Bulldog tandem spot for MCMG. Shelley slowly tries to pick apart Heath, Sabin tags in and we get some classic MCMG tandem work. They jam Heath’s neck into the middle turnbuckle, Double Kicks send Heath reeling. Elbow from Shelley, Shiranui gets countered and Heath hits a big Power Slam as we go to commercial.

Back from commercial, Rhino is in beating on Shelley. Rhino has been talking a lot this match and it’s kind fun to see this side of Rhino. Shelley gets beat on, whipped into the corner and Heath gets tagged back in. Shelley tries to fight back, but Heath hits a huge Open Hand slap and Shelley deflates. Irish Whip chest first into the corner, and Rhino gets tagged back in. Shelley is eating a ton of offense. Rhino goes for repeated Lower Back Forearms, Shelley tries to Back Elbow out of it, runs the ropes but Rhino hits the Kitchen Sink and Heath tags in.

Heath puts Shelley in the Tree of Woe and just stomps and punches the hell out of Shelley. Sabin frees Shelley and Shelley manages to catch Heath with a Flatliner into the corner. Slow tag option, as Heath gets Rhino in and Rhino levels Sabin before Shelley can tag out. Rhino is just Bear Hugs into Lariats into more Bear Hug, trying to wear out Shelley. Shelley barely escapes, tags in Sabin and Heath tags himself in. Sabin’s hot tag gets the momentum moving nicely for the Guns.

An interesting take on the Fighting Spirit spot with Heath and Sabin, but then see Shelley slip in, DDT on Heath into a Tandem Assisted DDT. Double Superkicks drop Rhino, Stereo Yakuza for MCMG, Skull and Bones attempt gets broken up, Rhino hits the Gore on Sabin, Heath drapes the arm over…but Sabin kicks out. One More Gore…but Sabin flips over Rhino, Victory Roll into MCMG WINS!

Overall Score: 7/10

So from a purely fan perspective, I’m happy that we got to see Joe Hendry and the Motor City Machine Guns on the episode. Capped off with the Guns winning and starting their third reign as IMPACT champions is great. Jordynne and Mickie’s segment was fairly amusing, the birth of a Wilde Witch is unexpected, Gisele potentially being on the road to some championship gold is interesting and even though its played out; Bubba and Dreamer was still entertaining.

This show definitely packed in a lot of characters, reminded us of some secondary stories and also confirmed that Jonathan Gresham has signed with IMPACT. Where even though I’m not his biggest fan, he’s a damn good wrestler, still has a solid IWC following, now just needs to develop some charisma.

Also unless I was drunk, it sounds like we’re getting a legit episode next week. So maybe IMPACT won’t be doing the clip shows anymore? Either way, this was a good episode.