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Mitchell’s NJPW Capital Collision Results & Report! (4/15/23)

There’s gold in DC!

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Who is THE best tag team in NJPW?

NJPW returns to DC and for a MAJOR dream tag match! Motor City Machine Guns defend their NJPW Strong Openweight Tag Team Championships against Aussie Open AND Okada-Tanahashi!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Kickoff Match – Shane Haste & Bad Dude Tito VS West Coast Wrecking Crew; Shane & Tito win.
  • 10 Man Tag: Rocky Romero, Chuck Taylor, Lio Rush, Clark Connors & The DKC VS KUSHIDA, Kevin Knight, Gabriel Kidd, Volador Jr. & Mike Bailey; Kushida, Knight, Kidd, Volador & Bailey win.
  • AR Fox VS David Finlay; Finlay wins.
  • NJPW World TV Championship: Zack Sabre Jr. VS Tim Lawlor; ZSJ wins and retains the title.
  • Tomohiro Ishii VS El Desperado; Ishii wins.
  • Juice Robinson VS Fred Rosser; No Contest.
  • Tetsuya Naito & Hiromu Takahashi VS SANADA & Yoshinobu Kanemaru; Sanada & Kanemaru win.
  • NJPW Strong Openweight Championship: KENTA VS Eddie Edwards; Kenta wins and retains the title.
  • NJPW Strong Openweight Tag Team Championships: Motor City Machine Guns VS Aussie Open VS Kazuchika Okada & Hiroshi Tanahashi; Aussie Open wins and become the new NJPW Strong Openweight Tag Team Champions.

PLAY BY PLAY

NJPW World TV Championship: Zack Sabre Jr. VS Tim Lawlor!

We saw members of TMDK and Team Filthy face off already, but now The Front Man and THE Filthy One fight over gold! Will the Submission Master’s 15 minutes of fame finally run out? Or will not even a Nasty Knee On The Brain end the ZSJ Show?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see who’s the brightest star in DC!

The bell rings and we’re on the clock. Fans rally up as the two circle, and Lawlor takes off the denim shorts to reveal the denim tights! The two feel things out, fans sing for ZSJ, and ZSJ gets an arm for a takedown! Lawlor clasps hands, rolls but ZSJ holds on. They roll around some more, Lawlor shifts and slips free but ZSJ pushes him down. Lawlor keeps ZSJ away with wristlocks and a monkey flip! They go around as Lawlor wants the arm now, but ZSJ gets a toehold. Lawlor goes for the other arm! ZSJ clasps hands, traps legs, floats to a CALF KILLER, but Lawlor rolls through it! Lawlor has a wristlock somewhere in there! The two roll into the ROPEBREAK!

The fans applaud and the ref counts. Both men let go but Lawlor stays close. Lawlor grins, pats ZSJ on the cheek, and the two reset. They knuckle lock, ZSJ clinches, then goes after the arm. Lawlor shifts to a waistlock, rolls to bring ZSJ down, and Lawlor has a standing leglock! But ZSJ shifts to get a HEEL HOOK! Lawlor has a HEEL HOOK! They fight heel hook to heel hook! It’s about who can twist a foot harder! Lawlor gets both legs! ZSJ sits up to forearm, but Lawlor SLAPS ZSJ! Fans duel, just like the heel hooks! And now they SLAP back and forth! It’s a SLAP fight on the mat! Neither man is slowing down!

Lawlor gets the edge, but then ZSJ has the HEEL HOOK! Lawlor HEEL HOOKS! Both men SLAP!! They both fall over and fans fire up! Both men stand up, they talk some trash, and ZSJ eggs Lawlor on. Lawlor CHOPS ZSJ off his feet! Fans are thunderous and Lawlor likes the taste. ZSJ gets up, and he plays it off like it was mediocre. ZSJ UPPERCUTS, but Lawlor comes back to UPPERCUT! ZSJ staggers around, talks more trash, and he UPPERCUTS! Lawlor UPPERCUTS! ZSJ UPPERCUTS! Lawlor forearms, ZSJ UPPERCUTS, Lawlor CHOPS and CHOPS and CHOPS ZSJ off his feet!

Fans fire up again as Lawlor stands ZSJ up. Lawlor CHOPS ZSJ to a corner, CHOPS him some more, and ZSJ sits down. Fans cheer Lawlor as he “kicks rocks” at ZSJ. Lawlor runs and leaps, but ZSJ avoids the shoulder tackle! ZSJ DROPKICKS the arm! And WRINGS it! We’re past five minutes, ZSJ is one-third of the way to retaining! ZSJ gets the arm, twists the wrist, stands on the other arm, and bends the arm! Lawlor endures as ZSJ tortures the arm, isolates it, and STOMPS it! Fans fire up and ZSJ flexes while Lawlor clutches that arm. ZSJ taunts Lawlor, but Lawlor KICKS him in the leg! And again!

Lawlor CHOPS ZSJ but ZSJ KICKS Lawlor in the arm! Lawlor has a bad arm, a bloody mouth, but he is loving it. ZSJ gives toying kicks and he eggs Lawlor on again. Lawlor stands, throws forearm after forearm, but ZSJ eggs him on more. Lawlor ROCKS ZSJ, but ZSJ runs to BOOT! Lawlor fires off a flurry of forearms, and fans fire up as he keeps ZSJ from falling over! Lawlor ROCKS ZSJ, but ZSJ UPPERCUTS! Lawlor bobs ‘n’ weaves, throws hands and he DECKS ZSJ! Fans fire up with Lawlor and he roars! Lawlor drags ZSJ up, gives him a bloody kiss, and an EXPLODER! ZSJ flounders and fans rally up!

Lawlor goes corner to corner, FLYING SHOULDER! And URENAGE! Cover, TWO! ZSJ survives but Lawlor smiles! Lawlor winds up his arm, waits on ZSJ to sit up, but ZSJ ducks the buzzsaw! Ankle pick and PENALTY KICK! ZSJ clutches his foot, he may’ve done more harm than good. ZSJ says he’ll still walk outta here, and he drags Lawlor up. ZSJ wrenches, but Lawlor ROCKS him! ZSJ wrenches again, but Lawlor ROCKS him! Another wrench, another forearm shot! Lawlor throws a flurry, ZSJ wrenches and PELE, but Lawlor blocks! ANKLE LOCK! ZSJ hops up and around to an IRON OCTOPUS!

Lawlor endures, stays standing, powers ZSJ off and back to the ANKLE LOCK!! ZSJ flails, reaches out, but Lawlor drags him back! Lawlor then shifts, rolls with ZSJ, into the TRIANGLE HOLD! ZSJ slips around but into an omoplata! Lawlor wants the other arm, ZSJ resists, Lawlor SLAPS away on his ribs! Lawlor pulls, but ZSJ shifts around! ARMBAR!! Lawlor turns over, ROPEBREAK! Fans are all fired up for this technical wrestling chess match! Both men stand, ZSJ ducks the enziguri to trip and body scissor, EURO- NO, Lawlor blocks the clutch! And he drags ZSJ into a REAR NAKED CHOKE!

ZSJ rolls out and has the wrists, EURO CLUTCH! TWO!!! Lawlor drags ZSJ back into the REAR NAKED CHOKE!!! ZSJ is flailing and we pass 10 minutes! ZSJ is fading! The ref checks and ZSJ gets a second wind for the ROPEBREAK!! The ref counts, Lawlor lets go and ZSJ just has to survive another five minutes! Fans rally, Lawlor storms up on ZSJ and brings him around, TORNADO- NO, ZSJ blocks! ZSJ powers to a suplex, MICHINOKU DRIVER! Both men are down and time is ticking away! Fans rally up, ZSJ crawls to a corner and aims. PENALTY- NO, Lawlor blocks! ZSJ SLAPS and SLAPS, but Lawlor fires boxing elbows!

Lawlor JUMP KNEES! ZSJ drops to his knees and fans fire up! Lawlor aims, BUZZSAW! Lawlor runs to PENALTY KICK with some sauce!! Cover, TWO!! ZSJ survives and we’re at the three minute warning! Lawlor scoops, but ZSJ wrenches! KIMURA! Lawlor reaches out, goes around, scoop and MICHINOKU DRIVER of his own!! Lawlor wraps ZSJ up but ZSJ slips around, pops Lawlor into a sunset flip! TWO! Lawlor sits on it, TWO! ZSJ sunsets, TWO! Lawlor has it, TWO! ZSJ has it again, TWO! Lawlor high stacks, TWO!!! ZSJ escapes by a narrow margin and runs in! BOOT! Lawlor ENZIGURIS!

Lawlor hurries to hook ZSJ up, but ZSJ blocks Magistrol! TWO and Lawlor finishes it, TWO! ZSJ has the arms, SEATBELT! ZSJ WINS!!

Winner: Zack Sabre Jr, by pinfall (still NJPW World Television Champion)

With two minutes to spare, The Front Man snatches it away! The Filthy Lawlor pushed ZSJ to his limits, but will anyone ever break through this mighty inaugural champion?

 

Tetsuya Naito & Hiromu Takahashi VS SANADA & Yoshinobu Kanemaru!

Los Ingobernables de Japon said no hard feelings when the Cold Skull left them for Just5Guys, but now the Ticking Timebomb is after the WORLD TITLE! Will the Uncontrollable Charisma help him get one up on their old friend? Or will Sanada and the Heel Master show them the limitations of tranquilo?

Naito takes his time with his entrance gear, but Sanada knows those tricks so he’s patient. The teams sort out, and after LIJ fist bump and J5G give thumbs up, Hiromu calls out Sanada. The IWGP Junior Heavyweight Champion wants a preview of that match, but Kanemaru steps up as a preview of their title match. Fans rally up as Hiromu and Kanemaru circle. The two tie up, break, then go again. Kanemaru puts Hiromu on ropes but Hiromu turns it around. The ref counts, Hiromu lets off but Kanemaru kicks his bad leg! Kanemaru whips, Hiromu reverses but Hiromu avoids Kanemaru’s low dropkick!

Kanemaru blocks a kick, CLUBS the leg, kicks the leg, but Hiromu fights off the back suplex with elbows. Hiromu forearms, Kanemaru UPPERCUTS, repeat! Kanemaru then kicks the bad leg, runs, but Hiromu follows to RANA! Fans fire up while Kanemaru bails out. Hiromu BLASTS Sanada! Hiromu goes out to whip Sanada into railing! Fans fire up and Hiromu goes back for Kanemaru. Hiromu stomps Kanemaru, taunts Sanada, then stomps Kanemaru more. Tag to Naito and fans fire up. Naito brings Kanemaru up, ROCKS and kicks and CLUBS him! Naito throws heavy elbows into Kanemaru, and Kanemaru falls out of the ring!

Hiromu holds Kanemaru, Naito builds speed, but Naito tranquilos! Fans fire up for that, but Sanada is a bit annoyed. Sanada knows the tricks but he still doesn’t like it. Hiromu puts Kanemaru back in for Naito and Naito stomps Kanemaru around. Tag back to Hiromu, LIJ drags Kanemaru up. They double whip, double elbow, then double basement dropkick! Hiromu BLASTS Sanada again! Sanada hits railing right by commentary! Hiromu has Kanemaru’s legs, for a FIGURE FOUR! Kanemaru endures, this is usually his move. Naito mockingly pushes the ropes forward for Kanemaru to reach.

Kanemaru fights his way over, but now Naito mockingly pulls the ropes back! The ref reprimands, Naito lets off, and Kanemaru gets the ROPEBREAK! Hiromu lets off, he grabs at Kanemaru, but Kanemaru kicks at him. Hiromu stomps Kanemaru, stands him up, and CHOPS! And CHOPS! And CHOPS! Hiromu whips corner to corner, runs in and clotheslines! Hiromu snapmares Kanemaru, runs, but Sanada trips him! Sanada drags Hiromu out and sends him into railing while Kanemaru dropkicks Naito’s legs out! Sanada stalks Hiromu, brings him back up, and CLAWS Hiromu’s back! And again!

Sanada puts Hiromu in, Kanemaru brings him up, and Kanemaru suplexes high and hard! Cover, TWO! Tag to Sanada and fans fire up. Sanada stands Hiromu up, CLUBS him down, but Hiromu CHOPS! And CHOPS! Sanada CHOPS back and Hiromu falls! Sanada paces, he brings Hiromu back up, and whips him to a corner. Sanada runs in, blocks a boot, and brings Hiromu out to trip him! Sanada ties Hiromu up in Paradise! Fans fire up and Sanada encourages them to get louder. Kanemaru dropkicks Naito down while Sanada takes aim. Sanada runs in, to dropkick Hiromu out of Paradise! Cover, TWO!

Tag to Kanemaru and he drags Hiromu up for a BIG atomic drop! Cover, TWO! Kanemaru pushes Hiromu into a CAMEL CLUTCH! Hiromu endures, Sanada gets in to play defense against Naito. Hiromu claws around, reaches out, and Naito can’t find an opening, so Hiromu gets the ROPEBREAK! Kanemaru lets go to stomp Hiromu. Tag to Sanada and fans rally up. Sanada brings Hiromu up but Hiromu fires forearms! Sanada staggers but he swings, only to miss! Hiromu CHOPS and CHOPS and CHOPS! Sanada CHOPS! Sanada back suplexes, Hiromu lands on his feet! Hiromu blocks the kick, and a punch, to DRAGON SCREW!

Hiromu crawls, hot tag to Naito! Naito LARIATS Sanada, BLASTS Kanemaru, blocks Sanada’s kick and shoves him away to then arm-drag on the return! Naito CLOBBERS Sanada, and basement dropkicks! Kanemaru returns, but Naito kicks and whips. Kanemaru reverses but Naito kicks back. Naito TOSSES Kanemaru, and he runs at Sanada! JUMP KICK! Leg sweep! COMBINACION CABRON! Fans fire up, Naito covers, TWO! Naito kicks Hiromu around, cranks on a neck wrench, but Sanada throws body shots. Naito CLUBS Sanada, dragon sleepers, NECKBREAKER, into PLUMA BLANCA! Sanada endures the leg hook full nelson!

Sanada kicks around, Kanemaru storms in to stomp away on Naito! Naito lets Sanada go, and he CLAWS Kanemaru’s eyes! Naito throws Kanemaru out, aims at Sanada, and Sanada slowly rises. CORRIENDO- DROPKICK! Sanada stops Naito, but Naito comes back! Only into a fireman’s carry and throw! Dragon sleeper, but Naito arm-drags free! Naito runs in, but Sanada brings him around, puts him on ropes, MAGIC SCREW! Both men crawl, hot tag to Kanemaru! Kanemaru runs to basement dropkick Naito! Cover, TWO! Kanemaru whips Naito to a corner, runs in and BOOTS!

Kanemaru brings Naito out, but Naito blocks the suplex! Kanemaru CLUBS Naito, runs and BOOTS, then BOOTS again! Kanemaru keeps moving but Naito ELBOWS and NECKBREAKERS in return! Fans fire up while both men are down, and Naito crawls again. Hot tag to Hiromu! DC fiers up as Hiromu whips Kanemaru toa  corner! Clothesline, snapmare, basement dropkick! Hiromu BLASTS Sanada, goes out, whips, but sanda reverses! Hiromu reverses back to send Sanada into railing! Sanada chases Hiromu to CLUB him down! J5G double whip, Sanada back elbows! Kanemaru back elbows!

Kanemaru feeds Hiromu to the ROLLING ELBOW! Kanemaru kicks and scoops, BRITISH FALL! Cover, TWO! Sanada goes out after Naito to keep him out while Kanemaru focuses on Hriomu. Naito elbows Sanada away but Kanemaru goes up top. Kanemaru wants Hiromu to stand. Hiromu stands, Kanemaru leaps but Hiromu gets under! Naito atomic drops, Hiromu SUPERKICKS, Naito ENZIGURS and HIROMU-CHAN BOMBER! Cover, Sanada breaks it! Naito tosses Sanada out and Hiromu roars! Fans fire up, Hiromu drags Kanemaru up to a fireman’s carry, but Kanemaru slips free.

Hiromu elbows Kanemaru, runs, but Kanemaru dodges to tilt-o-whirl! Hiromu throws him away but Kanemaru ENZIGURIS! Naito dropkicks Kanemaru’s legs out! Sanada dropkicks Naito’s legs out! Hiromu dodges Sanada’s dropkick to dropkick Sanada’s legs out! Kanemaru rushes in but Hiromu spins him around, FALCON ARROW! Cover, TWO!! Kanemaru survives but fans fire up with Hiromu. Hiromu fireman’s carries again, CORNER DEATH VALLEY! Hiromu drags Kanemaru back up, fireman’s carries again, TIME- NO, Kanemaru sunset flips! TWO! Sanada grabs Naito on the outside again!

Kanemaru shoves Hiromu, victory rolls him, TWO! Into the LAST SUPPER! J5G wins!!

Winners: Sanada & Yoshinobu Kanemaru, by pinfall

Naito is stunned! The Heel Master snatches the victory for his team, and pinned the IWGP Junior Heavyweight Champion! Will #Just5Guys have even more gold soon enough? Or can the Timebomb find a way to win on the Road to Wrestling Dontaku?

 

NJPW Strong Openweight Championship: KENTA VS Eddie Edwards!

Fang Revived retained this title against Minoru Suzuki at the NJPW X Impact Wrestling event, Multiverse United, but there’s still a long list of contenders! Will Kenta make Die Hard Eddie go to sleep? Or will Eddie make an impact on the NJPW Strong landscape?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see who’s grown the most since the last time these two met!

The bell rings and fans rally and duel. Kenta talks a little smack and the two circle. They tie up, Eddie powers Kenta to ropes, and the ref calls the break. Eddie lets off, but Kenta avoids the chop! Eddie applauds and Kenta tells Eddie to relax, take a breath. The two go again, tie up, and Eddie again powers Kenta to ropes. Kenta turns things around this time, lets off, then SLAPS Eddie! Eddie applauds Kenta, and Kenta again says to relax. The two reset again, tie up, Kenta avoids a chop to KICK! And he avoids another chop to KICK! Kenta headlocks, Eddie powers out but Kenta BOOTS! Kenta runs, but Eddie blocks the boot!

Eddie CHOPS Kenta off his feet! Kenta bails out and Eddie is a little annoyed. The fans rally and Eddie goes out after Kenta. Kenta RAMS Eddie into the apron! Kenta ROCKS Eddie with haymakers, the ref reprimands the closed fists, but Eddie CHOPS back! Kenta and Eddie egg each other on, and then Kenta claws Eddie’s eyes! Kenta puts Eddie in and says he’s better than this guy. Fans cheer that, and Kenta storms up to KICK! And KICK! And KICK! Eddie flops over and Kenta paces around. Kenta stalks Eddie to ropes, Kenta eggs him on but Eddie tells him to shut up. Kenta whips, Eddie holds ropes but Kenta elbows.

Kenta runs, but Eddie atomic drops! And OVERHEAD Belly2Belly suplexes! Fans fire up, Eddie grabs at Kenta but Kenta kicks from below. Eddie drops knees on Kenta! Eddie drags Kenta up, puts him in the corner, and CHOPS! Kenta sits down and sputters, but Eddie scuffs Kenta with his boot. Fans rally, Eddie soaks up the heat from DC, and he drags Kenta back up. Eddie whips Kenta to ropes, but Kenta kicks back! Eddie swings but Kenta spins him around into a DDT! Kenta hurries to a cover, ONE!! Kenta is surprised but the ref defends the count. Kenta drags Eddie up, snapmares and KICKS Eddie in the back.

Kenta KICKS Eddie again and Eddie writhes. Kenta again says he’s better than Eddie and fans cheer. Kenta drags Eddie up, KICKS him, and KICKS him, then follows him to the corner. Kenta claws Eddie’s face again! Fans rally and duel, Kenta turns Eddie for a NECKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Eddie is hanging tough but Kenta drops a knee! And another knee! Kenta brings the kneepad down, jumps, but just scuffs Eddie instead. Fans fire up and Kenta soaks it in. But he turns around into CHOPS from Eddie! Eddie CHOPS Kenta in a corner! Kenta sits down, Eddie gets the fans cheering and jeering, and Kenta crawls to the apron.

Eddie taunts Kenta, brings him back in and stands him up. Eddie HEADBUTTS Kenta down, CHOKES him on the ropes, but the ref counts. Eddie lets off at 4 and argues with the ref. Eddie smirks while fans boo and Eddie soaks it up. Eddie brings Kenta up but Kenta throws body shots! Eddie kicks Kenta down, but fans rally for Kenta. Eddie drags Kenta up, but Kenta fires off forearms! Eddie knees low, runs, but Kenta KICKS! And KICKS! And fires off a flurry! Eddie rebounds, Kenta dodges the lariat to POWERSLAM! Fans fire up while both men are down! Kenta sits up and snarls as he brings Eddie up. Eddie JABS!

Kenta goes to a corner, Eddie runs in, but into a BOOT! Kenta goes up, reels Eddie in, TORNADO HOTSHOT! Eddie flops back, Kenta climbs up, FLYING LARIAT! Cover, TWO! Fans rally, Kenta has the leg, STF! Eddie endures, claws at the mat, reaches out and pulls his way forward! ROPEBREAK! Kenta lets go quickly, and he drags Eddie up into a waistlock. Eddie elbows free, Kenta rebounds and BOOTS! Eddie rebounds but Kenta BOOTS! Kenta runs, but Eddie goes the other way to ELBOW! And BLUE THUNDER BOMB! Cover, TWO! Kenta survives and fans chant, “You Still Suck!” at Eddie. Eddie says he doesn’t care, and he brings Kenta up.

Eddie underhooks one arm, tries the other but Kenta wrenches out. Eddie ROCKS Kenta first, runs in at a corner, but Kenta BOOTS! Kenta goes up but Eddie GAMANGIRIS! Eddie hooks Kenta up, BACKPACK STUNNER! Cover, TWO! Kenta survives again and fans fire up but Eddie frowns. Eddie shakes his head, and he says night-night! Fans boo as Eddie copies Kenta, and he drags Kenta up to his feet. Eddie fireman’s carries, but Kenta claws eyes to get free! The ref reprimands, Kenta runs in and BOOTS! Eddie rebounds to BOOT! Kenta rebounds to BOOT! Eddie rebounds to BOOT! Kenta gives Kawada Kicks!

Eddie CHOPS, CHOPS and CHOPS! Kenta gives more Kawada Kicks! Eddie gives more CHOPS! The two go forehead to forehead, then Kenta SLAPS Eddie! Kenta runs, into a CHOP! But he still BOOTS! Kenta dodges the lariat, but Eddie LARIATS on the return! Both men are down and fans fire up again! The ref checks, both men stir. Kenta goes to one corner, Eddie to the other. Eddie runs in, into a BOOT! Kenta puts Eddie in the ropes, brings him out along them, BRAIN KILLER! Kenta strikes like a viper and Eddie sits up in a daze. Eddie goes to a corner, Kenta takes aim, and Kenta runs in to JUMP KICK!

Kenta keeps moving, HYDRAULIC DROPKICK! Fans fire up as Kenta goes up the corner now! From viper to the wrestler, and now the Prince, COUP DE GRACE!! Cover, TWO!! Fans fire up and want Kenta to say night-night. Kenta says F that, he slashes his throat! Fireman’s carry, but Eddie fights it off! Eddie swings, but Kenta CROSS COUNTERS! And again, and again, and again!! Kenta just windmills shots! Kenta DECKS Eddie!! Fans fire up and Kenta brings Eddie up again, for a BUSAIKU KNEE!! Cover, TWO!?! Eddie survives and Kenta is fuming! Fans are thunderous as Kenta fireman’s carries again!

GO TO- NO! Eddie lips out, lifts Kenta up, but Kenta throws hands! Kenta RANAS Eddie onto ropes! Kenta runs, to BLINDSIDE KNEE! Kenta keeps moving, Eddie LARIATS!! Eddie BUCKLE BOMBS Kenta, drags him back up, and underhooks those arms! TIGER DRIVER!! Cover, TWO!!! Kenta survives and Eddie is stunned! Fans fire up, Eddie aims from a corner and runs in, SHINING WIZARD! Eddie fisherman’s Kenta and lifts, DIE HARD FLOWSION!! Cover, TWO!?!? Kenta survives again and Eddie is beside himself! Fans rally up, Eddie brings Kenta up, and he fisherman’s the leg again. But Kenta slips out!

Kenta shoves Eddie at the ref, Eddie stops himself and elbows Kenta! But then Kenta RAMS Eddie into the ref! DDT!! Fans boo as both men and the ref are down! The Young Lions check the ref but Kenta realizes he has an opening. Kenta scoots away, goes out of the ring and he grabs his title belt! Kenta goes back into the ring, he takes aim at Eddie, BELT- SUPERKICK!! Eddie superkicks the belt into Kenta’s face! Fans boo as now Eddie picks up the belt. Eddie raises the title, and he thinks to return the favor. Eddie aims at Kenta, takes a swing, but Kenta LOW BLOWS!! Eddie staggers back, Kenta BELT SHOTS him!!

Kenta hides the evidence, he slaps the ref awake, and tells him to do his job. Kenta gets Eddie up, fireman’s carries, GO TO SLEEP!!! Cover, Kenta wins!

Winner: Kenta, by pinfall (still NJPW Strong Openweight Champion)

Eddie did his best to represent Pro-Wrestling Noah where these two got their start, but Kenta doesn’t worry about the past. Kenta is the present, will there never be a future NJPW Strong Openweight Champion?

 

Hikuleo has a message!

He mockingly applauds and congratulates Kenta on another successful defense. But if memory serves, Kenta is the only Bullet Club member with gold right now. So at Ryogoku, they were supposed to have a match, but after what Kenta did, Hiku’s coming for him at WRESTLING DONTAKU! For the NJPW Strong Openweight title! How about it, Kenta? Hikuleo says it’s time. Fans fire up for that, and Kenta gets a mic to respond. “Hikuleo… Let’s do it.” Fans fire up again! May 3rd gets even bigger, but will Bullet Club hold onto the gold? Or will the Young Guerilla prove he is NJPW Strong?

 

NJPW Strong Openweight Tag Team Championships: Motor City Machine Guns VS Aussie Open VS Kazuchika Okada & Hiroshi Tanahashi!

Alex Shelley & Chris Sabin have been big names in the tag team world for a long time, but this isn’t just a simple 2v2! Kyle Fletcher & Mark Davis are the NEW IWGP Heavyweight Tag Team Champions with just a week as champions under their belts, while the Rainmaker and The Ace have formed the dream team of the century! Will MCMG survive the odds? Or will the numbers spell disaster for them in Washington, DC?

The introductions are made, the Strong belts are raised, and we see who is really the best tag team in NJPW!

Tanahashi opens his coat and fans cheer the abs. Shelley shows off his abs, and fans cheer but not quite as loud. The teams sort out, and in this kind of Triple Threat, only two teams are legal. Aussie Open step back, so Tanahashi starts against Shelley. Fans fire up already as the two circle. Fans chant, “Go, Ace! Go, Ace!” Shelley and Tanahashi tie up, Shelley waistlocks then wristlocks, but Tanahashi wrenches to wristlock back. Shelley slips through, wrenches back and wristlocks. Tanahashi drops to get the leg, he drags Shelley down and floats to a headlock. Tanahashi hits the takeover but Shelley headscissors.

Tanahashi kips free, roles reverse as Shelley hits the takeover, but Tanahashi headscissors. Shelley kips free, Tanahashi air guitars, but Fletcher tags in with some stank! Fletcher shoos Tanahashi and circles with Shelley. Fans rally up for Fletcher and he dusts himself off. Shelley tags Sabin, and Sabin circles with Fletcher. They tie up, Fletcher wrenches and wristlocks, but Sabin rolls and handsprings to wrench back. Fletcher powers through to wrench and wristlock back. Fans rally, Sabin rolls, spins and handsprings to kip up and wrench again! Fletcher breaks the hold to CHOP!

Fletcher whips, Shelley tags in, MCMG double whip, drop toehold and BULLDOG! Fans fire up as Shelley mocks the “Aussie Aussie Aussie!” Shelley facelocks, Fletcher powers him back, and Okada tags in! Fans fire up as Okada kicks and CLUBS Fletcher. Fans rally for “O-KA-DA!” as he snapmares Fletcher and runs, to basement dropkick! Okada mocks the rhythm, “OKADA, OKADA, OKADA!” “OI OI OI!” “OKADA, OKADA, OKADA!” “OI OI OI!” Fletcher gets annoyed by that, and he scoops to SLAM Okada! Tag to Davis and fans fire up again. Davis brings Okada up to fire off forearms and elbows!

Okada staggers, Davis reels him in, but Okada fights the lift with elbows. Davis knees low, whips Okada to the open corner, then runs in. Okada dodges, Shelley elbows! Sabin elbows! Tanahashi misses, Fletcher splashes! MCMG fire off on Tanahashi, but then Tanahashi dodges Fletcher. Okada elbows Fletcher, Davis runs in, but Okada dodges to roll Davis up! MCMG break the cover! Fletcher tosses Shelley out but Sabin tosses Fletcher out. Tanahashi tosses Sabin out but Davis sends Tanahashi out! Okada kicks Davis and DDTs! Fans are thunderous for that chaos, and Okada covers, TWO!

The fans rally for “AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE!” “OI OI OI!” and Davis fights up. Okada CLUBS Davis, ROCKS him with a forearm, then tags Tanahashi. The dream team double whip, double elbow, then they kick Sabin as he runs in. The dream team double suplexes Sabin! Shelley runs in, but the dream team sees him first. Shelley apologizes and goes back to his corner. Tanahashi drags Davis by a leg, stomps it, then brings him around. Tanahashi tags Okada, the dream team split the wishbone! Okada brings Davis up, goes to gut wrench but Davis is too big for that! Okada CLUBS Davis, runs, but Shelley tags in!

Davis swats and CHOPS Okada, then hits a BIG back suplex! But Shelley runs in! Davis catches him in a choke grip! Sabin tries but he also gets caught! But MCMG break free to double whip, only for Davis to cartwheel and DOUBLE LARIAT! Fans fire up with Dunkzilla and he tags in the Aussie Arrow! Fletcher storms up on Shelley, fans rally, and Fletcher brings Shelley around. Fletcher ROCKS Shelley, ROCKS him again, then ROCKS him a third time! Shelley goes to ropes, Fletcher wrenches and whips him, but Shelley reverses! Sabin runs in, forearm, ELBOW, and a HIGH LOW! Davis runs in, into a clinch and ENZIGURI!

Shelley brings Davis to a knee, Sabin SOBATS, but Davis ducks the superkick! Only to get the BUZZSAW SUPERKICK COMBO! Fans fire up, Shelley BLASTS the dream team! Shelley takes a bow, fans rally up, and Sabin brings Fletcher up. Sabin wrenches, hooks Fletcher up, and he has an OCTOPUS! Sabin bends the finger, pushes Fletcher to a ghost pin, TWO! Sabin ROCKS Fletcher, and has him in the corner. Sabin brings Fletcher around, bumps off buckles, and tags in Shelley. MCMG double wrench, body shot, and crisscross to double whip and CLOBBER Fletcher!

Shelley clamps onto Fletcher with a wristlock, wrenches and wrangles Fletcher to the mat, then holds the arm down with a knee. Shelley gets the other hand to bend the fingers! Shelley tortures Fletcher’s arm, YANKS it, and traps it to drop a knee on Fletcher’s head! Fletcher clutches his head, it is still recovering from that nasty cut at Sakura Genesis. Shelley drags Fletcher up but Fletcher throws body shots. Shelley knees low, whips, but Davis tags in. Fletcher boots, SUPERKICKS, and Davis KNEES Shelley! BOOT SUPERKICK COMBO! Aussie Open BLASTS everyone else! They double whip Shelley, double CHOP him, then PENALTY KICK and SENTON!

Fans fire up and Davis brings Shelley to center. Kneeling cover, TWO! A little cocky, but Davis clamps onto the arm. Davis grinds Shelley’s shoulder, Shelley endures, and fans rally up. Okada gets in to BOOT Davis! Davis is just annoyed. Okada boots him again, so Davis CHOPS Okada down! Fans fire up, Davis whips Shelley from Sabin and clotheslines in the corner! Fans fire up more, Davis storms around and brings Shelley back up. Davis suplexes, holds Shelley up, and he tags in Fletcher. Fletcher takes the handoff, and he carries Shelley around while Davis BLASTS Sabin! And he blasts Tanahashi!

Fletcher still has Shelley up, it’s past TEN and Fletcher SLAMS! Cover, Sabin drags Fletcher back! Fletcher DECKS Sabin for that! Fletcher drags Shelley back up, but Shelley throws body shots! Shelley backs Fletcher down with every punch, then he CHOPS! Fans rally, Shelley reaches for Sabin but Fletcher keeps him away! Fletcher whips Shelley to the corner but Shelley BLASTS Davis! Fletcher runs in, but Shelley BUCKLE SHOTS Fletcher down! Fans rally as Shelley staggers and stumbles around, hot tag to Sabin! Sabin runs in, dodges Aussie Open to send them into each other! Sabin SHOTGUNS the dream team!

Sabin BOOTS Davis, ELBOWS Fletcher, goes up and DOUBLE CROSSBODIES! Then he PLANCHAS the dream team into the railing! Fans fire up and Sabin goes up top again. Sabin MISSILE DROPKICKS Fletcher! Fletcher goes to a corner, Sabin runs in but is put on the apron. Shelley clotheslines, clinches, and Sabin is up top! MISSILE DROPKICK COMPLETE SHOT COMBO! Cover, TWO!! Fletcher survives but MCMG rally the fans. Sabin drags Fletcher up, fireman’s carries, and Shelley removes the buckle pad. Fletcher slips off, Sabin switches, but Fletcher spins him around to suplex and BRAINBUSTER!

Both men are down, but neither of their partners are at the corners! Okada reaches out, he’s the only option! Fletcher says fine, and he hot tags the Rainmaker! Okada fires off on Sabin, whips, but Sabin reverses. Okada CLOBBERS Sabin down! Okada brings Sabin up, whips him to the corner and runs in, but into a boot! Sabin runs at Okada, into a FLAPJACK! Cover, TWO! Okada stalks Sabin as he rises, and fans rally up. Okada Alabama Lifts but Sabin CLUBS away! Sabin ROLLING ELBOWS Okada, runs in, but Okada pops him up! REVERSE NECKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Sabin survives but Okada keeps on him.

Okada scoops Sabin, SLAMS him, and goes up the corner. But Shelley returns to go after Okada! Okada fights Shelley off, but he has to leap over Sabin! Sabin comes back, GAMANGIRI! Both men are down again, and fans rally as Tanahashi and Davis are at their corners. Sabin figures why not, hot tags to Davis and Tanahashi! Tanahashi fires off on Davis, whips, but Davis reverses. Tanahashi FLYING FOREARMS! Fans fire up and Tanahashi roars! Tanahashi fires off more strikes, then he scoops to SLAM Davis in a drop zone! Tanahashi goes to the second rope, SUNSET SENTON! Cover, TWO!

Tanahashi keeps his focus, and he brings Davis up. Tanahashi whips corner to corner, Davis reverses but Tanahashi dropkicks the legs out! Tanahashi gets the leg to DRAGON SCREW! Fans fire up again, Tanahashi has Davis’ legs for the TEXAS CLOVERLEAF!! Okada intercepts Fletcher with a MONEY CLIP!! But MCMG get in! Shelley gets Tanahashi in a CROSSFACE, and Sabin has Okada in an OCTOPUS! But Aussie Open BOOT both holds apart! Fans fire up as Aussie Open get Okada out of the way. Davis tags Fletcher, they go after MCMG with forearms. They whip, MCMG dosido but Aussie Open dodge. Another dosido, SPINEBUSTER SANDWICH!

Aussie Open goes out, they get the dream team for DOUBLE APRON BACK SUPLEXES! And then, they pick up the dream team, for another SPINEBUSTER SANDWICH! Fans fire up again as Aussie Open focuses on Tanahashi in the ring. AUSSIE DENTAL PLAN! And then another scoop, LAWN DART CUTTER! Cover, TWO!! Tanahashi survives and fans fire up! Aussie Open keeps cool, and Fletcher tags Davis. Aussie Open drags Tanahashi up as fans rally and duel. Double wrench, pump handle, but Okada saves Tanahashi! Fletcher kicks Okada, runs, but Okada dodges to kick back!

The dream team double whip Fletcher, Tanahashi SLINGBLADES! Davis kicks and runs in, but into Okada’s DROPKICK! The dream team gets Davis up, scoop SLAM! Both men take a corner! Okada MACHO ELBOW! But Sabin sneaks a tag off Tanahashi before HIGH FLY FLOW onto KNEES! Davis saves himself, but Tanahashi’s no longer legal! MCMG lurk, they drag Davis out! They SMACK Davis off the apron, and they DOUBLE KICK him from the apron! Okada runs in, but MCMG dump him out! Shelley holds the ropes open and Sabin DIVES! Direct hit on Okada and Davis! But Fletcher SHOTGUNS Shelley onto Sabin!

Fans fire up and the Aussie Arrow takes aim. Fletcher goes up the corner, for the ARIHARA MOONSAULTS! Direct hit on Okada and MCMG, but Fletcher hits railing, too!! “This is Awesome!” as Davis puts Sabin in. Davis check son Fletcher, is he okay? Somehow, yes, so Davis focuses on Sabin. Fans fire up, Fletcher and Davis regroup. Davis tags Fletcher, the elbow pads come off, and Aussie Open run in. Sabin dodges, lariat hits lariat! Fletcher kicks Sabin, gives him to Davis, but Sabin redirects the dental plan into Davis! Then he uses Davis to kick off and TORNADO DDT Fletcher! Fans are thunderous as MCMG regroups.

MCMG DOUBLE SUPERKICK Fletcher, hoist him up, DIRT BOMB!! Cover, TWO?!?!?! Fletcher survives at the last possible second! Okada ripcords Shelley, but Shelley dodges! Okada tries again, Sabin saves Shelley to CUTTER Okada down! Tanahashi runs in but into a kick and whip. Tanahashi runs into an atomic drop, it’s the DREAM SEQUENCE! MCMG focuses on Fletcher, Electric Chair and cravat. Fletcher fights them both off! Fletcher rolls back, runs in, A-LIST LARIAT! Davis SLIDING LARIATS! Fletcher swing on Shelley, but into SLICED- NO!! GRIMSTONE!! Fans lose their minds as Davis gets Sabin!

Close Your Eyes and Count to EFF!!! Fletcher SHOTGUNS Tanahashi! Davis triangle jump LARIATS Okada!! Aussie Open resets and tries this again! LARIAT SANDWICH!! Pump handles, COREALIS!!! Cover, AUSSIE OPEN WINS!!!

Winners: Aussie Open, by pinfall (NEW NJPW Strong Openweight Tag Team Champions)

Another wild tag match leads to another incredible victory for Aussie Open!! As if winning the IWGP Heavyweight Tag Team Championships just last week wasn’t big enough, Fletcher & Davis are now TWO-TIME NJPW Strong Openweight Tag Team Champions, and DOUBLE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS!! Is it true? Are Aussie Open truly the future of tag team wrestling? Okada and Tanahashi get back in the ring, the dream team shows their respect to the winners, but will we see the Rainmaker and Ace get their own 2v2 shot at those belts?

As for the winners, Aussie Open get the mics, and fans chant, “You Deserve It!” Fletcher says, “In the immortal words of Hiroshi Tanahashi, we know. Washington, DC! Do you guys love NJPW or what?” The fans cheer because they do. Fletcher says that was one hell of a main event. Even though he nearly ensured he can never have kids. But two of the greatest Japanese wrestlers ever, if not in the entire world, and the greatest tag team of a generation. But look who is standing here the winners! Now Aussie Open has two sets of belts to prove they are THE BEST TAG TEAM IN THE WOOOORLD~!!

Wait, fans chant for “FTR! FTR!” Davis gets riled up hearing that, but Fletcher says, “That’s some BS right there.” But to prove it, Aussie Open will now create the best tag belt collection of all time. This was NJPW Capital Collision, this has been Fletcher & Davis, they are your IWGP Heavyweight and NEW NJPW Strong Openweight Tag team Champions. “Now and forever, we! Run! The! World!” If Aussie Open vows to be THE best, will that mean facing the rest?


My Thoughts:

What an awesome event for NJPW! Yes, I did skip stuff again, and I probably should’ve captured the Bullet Club related things. Finlay beating AR Fox was pretty much expected, but the important thing is that he recruited Clark Connors to the Bullet Club. Or as Finlay puts it, his Bullet Club. Finlay got a little meta in how he said NJPW was doing nothing with Connors, but he does have a point. Connors needed something, this could be it.

Then Juice VS Rosser ended up not even being a match. Apparently, as part of the build to this night, Rosser called Juice and Juice’s wife, Toni Storm, out, inviting Storm to be here tonight. Juice beats the crap outta Rosser with a chair, hits a piledriver to the stage, and then gives him a punch from his fist full of coins, all to top it off with the Will Smith “Keep my wife’s name outta your effing mouth!” Pretty sure the next NJPW Strong episode will address this, but I’d also love if Rosser decided to go after Juice on an AEW program to make this cross promotional.

As to what I did cover, all awesome stuff involving champions. ZSJ VS Lawlor was great stuff, and I figured ZSJ would retain this title. Lawlor came really close, though, who knows what’s next for him. Great stuff out of Naito & Hiromu VS Sanada & Kanemaru. Kanemaru getting the pin on Hiromu is a great surprise, and really adds to their Junior Heavyweight Championship match on April 27th. That match could probably go either way, but I expect Hiromu to retain so that we get the tease of Hiromu making history by having both major titles. Pretty sure Sanada will win at Wrestling Dontaku on May 3rd, though, he only just got this belt.

Kenta VS Eddie was really good stuff, and the fans definitely treated Kenta as the Face even though he clearly wasn’t. Kenta using cheats to win fits his character, but I like that Hikuleo called him out via video message. That’ll be a really good title match, could go either way, but I’m leaning towards Kenta retaining through similar nefarious means. And then that Triple Threat Tag main event was awesome stuff. I did NOT think Aussie Open would win, just because they already won the top tag titles. But then, it just makes sense that if they’re the top champions, they should get these titles, and so this makes a lot of sense. And fans said it, there has to be an eventual rematch with FTR to see who rules over all.

My Score: 9/10


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Mitchell’s ROH Death Before Dishonor Results & Report! (7/26/24)

YEEHAW!

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The word of the day is, “Gold!”

ROH brings Death Before Dishonor to Texas, and makes it bigger than ever! SIX championship matches, how drastically will the landscape change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – MXM Collection VS Spanish Announce Project; wins.
  • Komander VS The Beast Mortos; wins.
  • Texas Deathmatch: Leyla Hirsch VS Diamante; wins.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championship Qualifier: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS The Dark Order; wins and advances to Battle of the Belts 11.
  • ROH World Tag Team Championships: The Kingdom VS Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O’Reilly; win(s) and
  • ROH World Television Championship Survival of the Fittest: Atlantis Jr. VS Lio Rush VS Shane Taylor VS Johnny TV VS Lee Johnson VS Brian Cage; wins and
  • ROH Pure Championship: Wheeler Yuta VS Lee Moriarty; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship: Billie Starkz VS Red Velvet; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Championship: Athena VS Queen Aminata; wins and
  • ROH World Championship: Mark Briscoe VS Roderick Strong; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 7.25.2024

Slammiversary Fallout! Where do things go on the way to Victory Road?

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Well now we start the fall out of Slammiversary. Josh Alexander in his bad bitch summer, X-Speedball legacy, ABC got the t-a-g and Jordynne is still in charge of the Knockouts division. Like I said at the end of Slammiversary, all of the champions being Babyfaces is stupid. They need to drop a couple titles fairly quickly, because I don’t care what some people say, Nic Nemeth ain’t gonna bring any eyes to the brand. He’s about as hot as day old Hamburger Helper over a camping sterno.

We’ll probably open with the luke warm champion, so tune in like 10 minutes late for anything of substance to be happen.

https://x.com/i/status/1816629254349533588

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner: Maclin wins via KIA – *
  • AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan: AJ wins via Down Payment – **
  • Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young): Hammer Your ASH wins via Torture Rack – ** 1/2
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey): Broken Alphabet wins via Twist & Splash – ***

 

Results:

Nemeth gives the ole “I’ll be a fighting champion…blah blah” promo and drops the “any company” line that we’ve already understood what that means. Campaign Singh cuts him off…and I never thought I’d be happy for Campaign Singh to walk out and say anything…ever. And…Mustafa’s promo is worse than Dolph’s. He’s gone from parody to caricature even saying “it was the biggest screw job Montreal ever saw”. Like some of these lines are cheap heat, but most are just brain dead comments that wouldn’t get a reaction out of anyone (and the crowd was silent for that comment). Mustafa gets caught in an Archer “phrasing” moment about getting screwed hard, but this is painful. Promos written by 14 year olds everyone…

This ends with Ali challenging Nemeth for the World Title. While I’m not against walk up challenges, I watch Japanese wrestling, I don’t really get the point aside from doing it just to do it. 

ABC and Matt Hardy have a small promo, and I’m still not really a fan of Unbroken Matt Version 6.0. The floating between Broken voice and his normal voice sounds amateurish.

OH LOOK, finally a match 20 minutes into the show. And it’s my son Steve Maclin! OH CHRIST he’s facing Deaner. This has been 25 minutes of talking followed by the worst god damn attempt at a gimmick. Deaner’s little “Papa Santino told me I can wipe my ass only if the crowd agrees”. This gimmick should die in a fire.

Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner

Deaner started off quick because Maclin was in disbelief that Deaner was actually gonna fight him. Maclin dodges a Crossbody, Busaiku Knee, and just starts beating on Deaner for fun. And this is fun, maybe Maclin can make sure Deaner gets stretchered out and written off forever. How do you call for an ambulance in French? Maclin with the old Back Breaker into a stretch. Deaner tries to nerd rage up, breaks the Back Breaker Stretch, his punch combo, into a Manhattan Drop and Bulldog. Deaner hits the Crossbody, but Maclin kicks out. This is entirely too competitive.

Deaner goes for the Deaner DDT, blocked, Olympic Slam into Splashing Deaner into the corner, Caught in the Crosshairs, K-I-A, thanks for coming you damn dweeb. Stay in Canada and don’t travel Deaner, please.

https://x.com/i/status/1816633784537874761

AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan

As the bell sounds, Sami knocks Rich off the apron, Low Bridges AJ, does the Beats of the Bodhran on AJ and then AJ eats the offense and strategizes with his crew. Bishop and Rich swarm the ring, Sami allows himself to get distracted so AJ slides in and starts beating on Sami. AJ throats Sami across the middle rope and Rich makes his presence felt, AJ distracts the referee and Rich gets in a lot of cheap shots. Bishop throws Sami back in the ring, and AJ keeps up the pressure. Lots of 5 count chokes and leverage moves. After the commercial break ends, Sami dodges a Tennessee Whiskey Knee, gets in a few shots before Rich trips Sami as he’s setting up a Dive, and then AJ takes advantage of the position and hits the goofball knee strike.

AJ calls for his Chokeslam, Sami tries to break it with Axe Handles, then claws the eyes. Sami goes for a Scoop Slam, gets him part way up and then falls over. AJ Chokeslam again, but he bites his hand and starts fighting back. Launches himself at AJ, sends him bouncing off the ropes and uses the momentum to hit that Scoop Slam that was teased earlier. Sami goes for a Western Lariat but eats a Big Boot. AJ does a little Hulk Hogan pose to signal a Leg Drop, but Sami dodges and then connects on a Sliding Lariat. Thumbs Up, Thumbs….interference. Rich distracts the ref, Bishop lays out Sami, AJ connects with the Down Payment.

Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young)

ASH and Jordynne exchange slaps and then Jordynne starts to out muscle ASH. Spinebuster from Jordynne, Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights off, rope run, Sattelite DDT into both tagging out. EY does the Flair corner flop, slides back in between Hammer’s legs, and connects on a Neckbreaker. EY is the quicker of the two, but Hammer finally gets his hands on him and a Release Belly to Belly into a full mount raining of fists, then a near fall. Hammer smashes EY in a corner, Arm Wringer into an Irish Whip across, but EY moves and Hammer tags out to ASH. ASH levels Jordynne, peppers EY with a few shots and pulls him back to their corner and starts some tandem offense with Hammerman. Hammer Guerilla Presses ASH and throws her into EY for a near fall. Hammer looks to aim for either a Powerbomb or Nightmare Pendulum, but EY drops it into a Small Package, pinfall kick out, they both run, Double Lariat spot. The Knockouts get tagged in.

Jordynne is in control early, World’s Strongest Slam into a Vader Bomb. Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights it off and tags out to Hammer. Jordynne and EY do some schoolyard stuff with the old Push while Jordynne is down to trip Hammer. All four get in, ASH gets leveled, EY gets leveled, Hammer and Jordynne have a brief face off, but Hammer throws Jordynne to the apron and ASH connects with a Meteora from the apron. Death Valley Driver from Young on Hammer, ASH stares in shock, EY tells her to get, ASH runs away. EY goes up for his Macho Elbow, and ASH causes him to fall to Hammer’s feet, Torture Rack, and EY submits.

Josh Alexander comes out, with new heel music. And it’s not that bad, definitely better than some other people’s new music. Josh yells at the crowd a bit, says he can’t wait til he’s back in a real Canadian town, like his home of Toronto. Then he drops the mic in lieu of an explanation. The crowd chants him off with the “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey”. 

https://x.com/i/status/1816647373654724937

The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey)

JDC and Hardy start, but JDC quickly tags out to Myers and that doesn’t go well. Hardy grabs a hold of Myers, a few Delete chops, drags him to his corner and they all get in a few shots punctuated with Hardy getting tagged back in and an Elbow into Myers’ extended and worked on left arm. Myers stays isolated, back into the corner, Boot to the gut, Ace tags in and wallops Myers. Ace connects on Double Kicks, into Russian Leg Sweep and his half of Click Click Boom, for a 2 count. Myers finally gets free with a Jaw Breaker and tags out to Eddie. But The System gets no momentum, Ace stifles Eddie’s offense and starts a few quick tags with him and Bey for tandem offense. Moose finally comes down the ramp as Eddie kicked out of yet another pinfall attempt because The System has had nothing going for them. Eddie finally gets some offense since Moose was a big enough distraction.

Eddie thinks they have a spot, so he tags back in JDC, but The ABC stop him cold, tag in Matt Hardy, and Matt walks down JDC, but JDC Low Bridges. Matt is on the outside, so all of The System surrounds Hardy, then Joe Hendry’s music hits! That stops the heel beatdown, and we follow Hendry’s entire entrance. So that proves Hendry is bigger than the 8 other people in this frame. Not really sure if that’s optics you want to push along. Ace and JDC try to remind people there’s wrestling going on, but JDC thumbs the eye to get a little something going. Vertical Suplex for a near fall, tag out for Eddie and Eddie lights up Ace with some of those NOAH Chops. Ace retreats to the ropes and Alisha chokes him with the ropes while the ref is distracted.

Myers gets tagged in, Ace tries to use the crowd energy, Myers stops it at first but then Ace slips a Scoop Slam and tags out to Bey. Hot tag, strike rush, Double Stomp, educated feet, Leap Frog to the corner but Lish climbs on the apron and yells at Bey which stops his rhythm. Myers kicks his feet out and causes Bey to crash. Eddie tags in for a few shots, then to JDC and Slingshot Knees, Wringer Snapmare, Bow and Arrow Submission, and JDC is just doing solid wrestling work right now. Uppercut between the Shoulder Blades as Bey tries to get out, tag to Myers and Bey is still eating offense. Eddie tags in, Bey tries the Sunset Flip, but Eddie tags out before going over, so Myers folds up Bey for a near fall and then tags out to JDC who connects on a Standing Suplex, slams Bey’s face into the corner, Eddie tags in, and Bey finally fights up to his feet, Eddie just flatten Bey’s comeback, tries a Tiger Driver but eats an Enzuigiri for a simultaneous tag. JDC and Hardy come in, JDC tries to exit halfway in, but Hardy is wrecking shop. He disposes of Eddie, Myers slides in but eats a tandem Neckbreaker/DDT from Hardy. Face team does the Delete Corner Face Smashes. Poetry in Motion into a Side Effect into Corkscrew Swanton for only 2 since Myers breaks it up! Everyone throwing hands, referee is distracted, Moose comes in to Spear Hardy, but Hardy dodges and throws him into JDC (I get the call back), Hendry then lays out Moose with the big Lariat. Twist of Fate from Hardy, Splash from Bey, Broken Alphabet wins!

 

Overall Score: 4/10

Ugh, cliche promos, too damn much talking, a competitive squash match with an imbecile as our first “match”, into an overbooked and slow heel match, finally a decent tag match (with the right team going over), into another overbooked match with a “tease” for the mystery backup being more obvious than Jericho’s WWF debut.

Aside from the afore mentioned tag match, The Rascalz promo and The System Promo; this was hard to watch. A lot of cornball promos, Rosemary licks her conspiracy board, storylines got zero traction. Whoopity Doo, Ryan Nemeth got a match next week and we get an undead wedding.

While this was a bad episode, it was bad by at least new standards. We’re not back in the TNA Dark Days again, but this was…a useless show.


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