Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (9/15/23)

The Champ! Is! HEEEERE~!

Published

1 year ago

September 15, 2023

Steven Mitchell

Will John Cena endure the Grayson Waller Effect?

John Cena returns to SmackDown, to be a guest on Grayson Waller’s talk show! What will the Aussie Icon have to ask the Greatest Of All Time?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

AJ Styles VS Finn Balor w/ The Judgment Day; Finn wins.
The Street Profits w/ Bobby Lashley VS Cruz Del Toro & Joaquin Wilde w/ The LWO; The Profits win.
LA Knight VS The Miz; Knight wins.
Bayley w/ Dakota Kai VS Asuka; Asuka wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Pat McAfee is here!

Denver is all fired up but Corey Graves is upset that Pat is back! He gets the mic to say, “Mile High City, I love you~! Y’know, I was just up the road in the Rockies for College Game Day covering Deion Sanders and the Colorado Buffalos, and when I looked online to keep up with the greatest wrestling show to ever grace television, WWE SmackDown, I saw that it was an hour away in this gorgeous city. And there was ZERO percent chance I wasn’t gonna take the ride down here to feel the greatest universe on Earth, the WWE Universe!” Fans cheer that!

Pat then says the greatest crowds of all crowds, and so it is his honor to welcome us to Friday Night SmackDown! But wait, here comes Austin Theory… Pat is no stranger to The Now, and Theory makes his way to the ring as fans boo. Theory has a mic now and he tells Pat, “This isn’t SmackDown! This is Austin Theory Live!” Fans boo more but Theory says look what the cat dragged in. Fans cheer for Pat but Theory says a lot of the people living here don’t get a lot of oxygen because we’re so high up. But hey, they gotta boo Theory, he’s only 26 years old and he’s everywhere. Pat at 26 was getting mug shots while Theory is on mugs, shirts and backpacks!

Theory tells the fans to shut up but they boo harder. Theory says he is here for Pat. They have unfinished business! Theory doesn’t know who Pat thinks he is, having his private jet and his news desk to talk about college football all day. But Theory has something real special. He’s gonna job Pat in a few seconds, and then what happens? Pat is gonna go back to his show, sit there all hurt and unable to do a damn thing, just like Aaron Rogers! Fans boo and they’re not even Jets fans! But Pat says Theory’s the one not gonna do a damn thing but Pat is pumped Theory is dressing like him and acting like him.

Theory says dawg, when he wears a black tank top, he looks like a Greek god! When Pat wears one, he looks like he should be flipping fries. Pat tells the Greek god to listen up. Pat’s not gonna fight Theory now, he’s enjoying the local laws here, wink wink. But uh, what was that about this not being SmackDown but what? Austin Theory Live! Get used to it, loser! Oh, well this is the biggest problem with Theory. Theory is so disrespectful to not just the business as a whole, but to all the people in the crowd. Fans cheer but Theory says he doesn’t care about them! Pat tells Theory this will never be HIS show, this is the people’s show.

And y’know what that means? IF YA SMELLLL~! Fans go nuts as yes, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson makes his epic return to SmackDown! The Rock smiles as he soaks it all in. Then he makes his way down the ramp! Fans fire up even more as The Rock gets up on the corner for his signature pose. Then The Rock steps into the ring with Pat and Theory, and The Rock of course bro hugs it out with Pat. The fans chant for “ROCKY! ROCKY!” and he smiles as he soaks it in again. The fans lose their minds even, which Fox has to censor. Theory says, “You know whose ring you’re in? It’s been a long time, Rock. A long time.

“But let me-” “Shut your b*tch ass up!!” Rock stops Theory in his tracks with that! Theory clearly does NOT know how all this works. The Rock takes off the jacket to show off the guns, and then he throws the jacket to the crowd for a free souvenir! “Finally, The Rock has come back to Denver…!” Fans fire up for that one, and chant for “ROCKY! ROCKY!” again. Theory says he will try. “Finally-” The fans boo over Theory but he says the ignorant people finally get to see The Rock and Austin in the ring again, one last time. But it won’t be boring old Stone Cold, it’ll be a real ass kicker! The Austin that’ll go on to be so great, he’ll be the entire Mount Rushmore!

The Rock says- “IT DOENSN’T MATTER WHAT THE ROCK SAYS!” Theory beat Rock to the punch on that one, but The Rock says it does matter what The Rock says. And it does matter what the people say. You bring up Stone Cold, that’s The Rock’s boy. But if Stone Cold were here instead, this is what he would say. “If you wanna see me beat this Jabroni’s ass, gimme a ‘Hell yeah!'” “HELL YEAH!!” The roof blew off the place because they are live, this is The Rock’s show, and it matters what the fans say. So hearing how hot the fans just got, Theory wants to talk trash about The Rock, talk trash about Pat, about the fans…

The Rock says this is Austin Theory, right? Damn right! And he’s from… A-Town? Right? Damn right! Well, something else The Rock is right about is that Theory is an A-Hole. And oh, The Rock is gonna show you live how much of an A-Hole Theory is. In about three seconds, this side is gonna chant “You Are.” And then the other side chants “An A**hole!” Three, two, one. “YOU ARE!” “AN A**HOLE!” And they do!! It gets censored again but oh well. The Rock has everyone stop, because that was amazing! Denver cheers themselves and The Rock has goosebumps. But this is the people’s show, let’s flip it around!

Three, two, one! The fans go again, “YOU ARE!” “AN A**HOLE!!” Theory gets so mad and he shouts for them to stop! Shut up! Enough! He is not that! But the fans won’t stop! The censoring can’t even keep up! Pat says this is a two hour show, we gotta get going. Right, but we’re having fun, aren’t we? The fans cheer that. The Rock tells Theory that he doesn’t know who Theory is, but he knows what Theory is, and clearly you’re an a-hole. But Theory, The Rock has a theory of his own: Theory comes out here on The Rock’s Show, the People’s Show, and runs down the people. They’re the reasons why this all happens.

So the theory is, in three seconds, The Rock whoops Theory’s candy ass all over Colorado. Fans fire up as The Rock counts down, but Theory fires hands first! Theory whips, The Rock reverses and hits a SPINEBUSTER! And we know what that means! Fans are thunderous and Pat clears space for this one! The Rock sets Theory up, runs side to side, for the PEOPLE’S ELBOW!! The Rock then welcomes Pat to try something. Pat gets up on Theory, fans are thunderous for it, and Pat runs side to side, for the MCAFEE ELBOW! Theory’s shoe comes off! The Rock throws it to the fans, another free souvenir!

If this is how the night is starting, just what madness is going to happen here in the Mile High City?

AJ Styles VS Finn Balor w/ The Judgment Day!

The Phenomenal One wanted to get after Solo Sikoa for going after him when he went after Jimmy Uso, but who would’ve guessed The Prince would feed his frenemy to the Enforcer? Will Styles get payback on Finn and clear a path to the Bloodline? Or will having Damian Priest & Dominik Mysterio with him help Finn put Styles down?

SmackDown returns and Styles makes his entrance, minus The OC. Gallows is hurt, so no Good Brothers at all tonight. The bell rings, the two circle, but then Priest creeps up. Styles senses it but Finn fires off in the distraction! Finn fires off hands in the corner, the ref counts, but Finn stomps a mudhole! Finn backs off but he brings Styles back up. Finn whips, but Styles blocks hip toss. Finn blocks hip toss but Styles clinches for a RUSSIAN ELG SWEEP! Then a scoop and BACKBREAKER! Styles storms up, whips, but Finn reverses. Styles sunset flips, Finn rolls through to basement dropkick! Cover, ONE! Finn keeps on Styles with ELBOWS to the neck and shoulders!

Finn clamps on a chinlock, he grinds Styles down, but fans boo. Styles endures, fans rally, and Styles fights up. Styles throws elbows and body shots, blocks a shot to ROKC Finn! Styles runs, but Finn SOBATS! Finn runs but Styles hurdles, drops and DROPKICKS! Then a scoop and BACKBREAKER! Finn bails out and regroups with his boys, fans fire up with Styles, and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and Styles fights a chinlock to JAWBREAKER! Finn staggers, Styles CHOPS him then whips. Finn reverses but Styles ducks ‘n’ dodges, DOUBLE CROSSBODIES collide! Even Dom and Priest are hurting from that. Fans rally while both men are down, Styles sputters as he sits up, and Finn goes to ropes. Finn swings but Styles counters to fire off the Phenomenal Blitz! Then SLIDING FOREARM! Fans fire up with Styles and he runs in at the corner to clothesline! Fireman’s carry, but Dom distracts! Finn CLAWS Styles’ eyes, then swings, but into an atomic FACEBUSTER! Cover, TWO!!

Dom and Priest are relieved but Styles drags Finn up. Styles bumps Finn off buckles, puts him up top, and Styles climbs up after him. Styles throws hands and fans fire up, but Finn slips free of the Super Steiner! Finn stands, but Styles trips him up! Fans fire up as Styles drags Finn off the top, into the STYLES- NO, Finn kicks the Clash! But Styles deadlifts and fireman’s carries, USHIGOROSHI! Finn flops out of the ring and the Judgment Day is there. Styles slingshots to FLYING FOREARM! Down goes Finn! The ring count climbs, Styles has Dom and Priest back down. Styles puts Finn in, Dom runs up but Styles CLOBBERS him!

Styles hops up onto the apron, but Priest goes after him! The ref spots that, so he EJECTS Priest & Dom! Fans fire up as justice is served! Styles ROCKS Finn, springboards, but Finn gets under! So Styles kicks Finn, reels him in, but JIMMY USO is here! Styles CLOBBERS Jimmy but Finn rolls Styles up! FINN WINS!!

Winner: Finn Balor, by pinfall

The Judgment Day still get away with one, all because Jimmy “I’m Still In” Uso returned the favor! Will The Tribal Chief take Jimmy back after this? Or will Jimmy just have Styles gunning for him even harder?

Pat and The Rock talk backstage.

That “You Are An A-Hole” thing was amazing. It could’ve gone on, and on, for all two hours! Pat then points out there’s a guy you can’t see here. The Rock turns around and it’s John Cena! These old rivals step up, and they catch each other trying not to smile. They shake hands and hug it out, and Cena heads on.

Jimmy Uso spots Paul Heyman.

Jimmy wants to talk with OG, but then Finn walks up and thanks Jimmy for the assist. Jimmy says this wasn’t about The Judgment Day. As Jimmy sees it, he’s simply returning the favor for last week. They’re even now. Oh? Okay. Yeah, it’s just payback for everyone who did Jimmy wrong. Okay, okay. That’s cool. But Finn’s seen Jey on Raw. Jimmy must miss his brother. Jimmy says he doesn’t know what Finn means. Finn says he misses his brothers, surely Jimmy misses Jey. Finn talked with Jey about joining Judgment Day, and Jey didn’t say no, so… Finn got to thinking, and maybe…

What if both the Usos joined The Judgment Day together? That’d take care of all these issues he’s got going on right now! Jimmy appreciates the offer but he’s good, Uce. Okay, just wanted to put it out there. Because the thing about Judgment Day, there’s no leaders, Uce. Y’know what that means? There’s no Roman Reigns. Finn heads out, and now Heyman walks over to talk with Jimmy. Jimmy doesn’t say anything, but is The Prince on to something?

The LWO is in the ring.

Rey Mysterio has the United States Championship on his shoulders and his team around him as they’re given the official introduction. Rey asks Denver what’s good, and says there’s nothing but love and respect here to the fans, and to his familia, the Latino World Order. When Rey came to SmackDown a year ago, not only was his career at a crossroads, but he was personally going through the hardest time in his life. Without going into detail, Rey truly felt devastated and heartbroken. But then, the LWO reminded Rey of who he is, and what familia really means. And now, Rey is the US Champion once again. And he has a united family that is stronger than ever.

Santos Escobar tells Rey that this family is a family of champions. When Austin Theory attacked Escobar and took him out, Rey stepped up. Escobar is so happy Rey did it. Rey took Austin down, and he became WWE United States Champion, like the legend he is! Fans cheer, Escobar says his dream has always been to face his idol, Rey, with a title on the line. So Rey, would you do Escobar the honor of facing him for the US Championship? Fans fire up for that, and Rey asks if Escobar is serious. After all they’ve been through, Escobar wants a title opporutnity? Escobar has nothing but love and respect for Rey and Rey knows that.

Then Escobar knows Rey feels the same way. So of course he accepts! They hug it out and Escobar says Rey had him going there. But wait! Bobby Lashley & The Street Profits are here! Denver cheers for their own Rocky Mountain Machine and he has a mic to say, “This is what I was telling you, fellas. We’ve got tag teams crumbling, falling apart. And then we got tag teams having this awkward love fest in the middle of the ring. A few weeks ago, we said we were taking over. And from the looks of it, this is gonna be easier than I ever imagined.” Dawkins says he ain’t lying! Santos is asking for opportunities, Rey is giving away opportunities like he Oprah!

Montez Ford starts on the Oprah Meme, but LWO stops them right there! Cruz Del Toro says they all talk a good game, when they’re 50 feet away! Vaminos, get in the ring! Joaquin Wilde says they’re always ready for a fight, so let’s go! The Profits VS Cruz & Wilde happens after the break!

The Street Profits w/ Bobby Lashley VS Cruz Del Toro & Joaquin Wilde w/ The LWO!

SmackDown returns as the match is already underway, and Wilde drags Dawkins up to whip. Wilde ELBOWS Dawkins down, drops an ELBOW, then covers, but Ford breaks it! Ford snarls, but Cruz GAMANGIRIS him back! Cruz runs at Dawkins but Dawkins TOSSES him right out! Wilde BOOTS Dawkins, BOOTS again, then goes up the corner! FROG- NO, he has to bail out as Dawkins moves! Ford sneaks a tag, and then Wilde runs into the REVELATION! Cover, Profits win!

Winners: The Street Profits, by pinfall

Ford & Dawkins make quick work of Cruz & Wilde, and Lashley talks with them. SHOW them who they are! So Ford & Dawkins beat up on Wilde & Cruz! Escobar & Rey run in to get them off the LWO, but Lashley CLOBBERS Escobar! Rey is stunned, but Ford anchors Rey’s foot and Dawkins DECKS him! The Almighty and his Profits head out, will anyone survive the hostile takeover?

LA Knight VS The Miz!

Is the Mega Star in the midst of a meteoric rise? YEAH! Did he defeat the Hollywood A-Lister at Payback? YEAH! Is the Miz furious about that? YEAH!! So here is the rematch to placate Miz’s anger, but will he get even with Knight? Or will he be forced to admit, whose game is it?

The bell rings and fans fire up for Knight. Knight and Miz circle, Miz fires himself up and they tie up. Knight powers Miz to a corner, Miz pulls hair to get out of the corner! Miz headlocks, Knight powers up and out, but things speed up and Knight runs Miz over! Fans fire up while Miz is fuming. Knight says “YEAH!” and the fans echo it. The two circle, tie up, and Miz waistlocks. The fans taunt Miz’s “TINY BALLS!” while Knight elbows out. Knight headlocks, Miz powers out but Knight runs him over! Knight then dodges Miz and shows haymaker but Miz scrambles to a corner! The ref wants Knight to stay back but Miz YANKS Knight into buckles!

Fans boo as Miz stomps a mudhole into Knight. Fans again bring up “TINY BALLS!” but Miz says they’re massive! Miz CHOPS Knight, “MASSIVE!” Another CHOP! Miz argues with the ref, but Knight spins to CHOP! And CHOP! And CHOP! Knight whips, scoops and POWERSLAMS! Cover, TWO! Knight storms up on Miz, scoops him again but Miz slips off to waistlock. Knight bucks the O’Conner Roll to SWINGING NECKBREAKER! Miz staggers up, Knight runs in but Miz sends him out! Knight RAMS into Miz, then SLINGSHOT SHOULDER TACKLES! Stack cover, TWO! Knight whips, Miz reverses and kitchen sink knees Knight down!

Fans boo but Miz soaks up the heat. Miz runs to basement BOOT! Fans rally for Knight while Miz paces around. Miz drags Knight into a HIP DROP! Miz says he is the gatekeeper! He takes down the newbies every time! But Knight throws hands! Miz shoves Knight, Knight swings but into a back suplex! Knight manages to land out and he shoves Miz into a corner! JUMPING NECKBREAKER! Knight goes up to FLYING BULLDOG! Then Knight runs to SLIDING BOOT! Cover, TWO! Miz is still in this but Knight smirks. Knight stalks Miz as he crawls for the apron. Knight drags Miz back in but Miz messes up the apron skirt!

The ref fixes the skirt and misses Miz RAKE the eyes! Miz runs in at the corner, A-LIST LARIAT! Miz says “GOOD KNIGHT!” and DRAPING COMPLETE SHOT! Cover, TWO!! Miz is frustrated but the fans rally for Knight, and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and fans boo as Miz paces around Knight again. Miz says watch this! Miz runs to PUNT Knight in the side! Then he KICKS Knight down, KICKS Knight in the side, then KICKS him in the chest! Miz runs, to BOOT Knight down! Fans boo but Miz soaks it up as he runs again, to SLIDING KNEE! Cover, TWO! Knight is still in this and Miz is losing his cool. Miz stalks Knight, shouts “MASSIVE!” Full nelson, but Knight elbows and arm-drags free! Knight is in a corner, Miz runs in but Knight ROCKS him first! But Miz kicks low! Miz whips, Knight reverses but Miz KICKS back! Miz runs, into a LARIAT!

Knight then clinches, RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Kick and DDT! Miz ends up in a corner, fans cheer as Knight stomps the “YEAH!” into Miz! Knight runs corner to corner, to KNEE WASH! Miz flops, Knight covers, TWO! Miz is still in this but Knight keeps cool. Knight paces around Miz now, drags him up and suplexes, but Miz slips free to full nelson! Knight drops down to victory roll, TWO! Miz has the cover, with tights! TWO!! Miz kicks low, BASEMENT- NO, Knight holds ropes to deny the DDT! Miz flounders, Knight shakes his head and slingshots in, to RAM into Miz, then slingshot again, into a BOOT!

Miz has Knight in the ropes, runs side to side to KNEE LIFT! And then DRAPING CODE BREAKER! Cover, TWO!! Knight survives and Miz is shocked! Denver fires up as Knight sits up. Miz gets mad at the ref, but then he aims at Knight. Miz winds up, Knight ducks to roll Miz up! Miz rolls through but Knight ROCKS him with haymakers! Miz kicks a leg out! Miz runs, but Knight FLAPJACK HOTSHOTS! Fans spell it out, “L! A! KNIGHT! YEAH!!” B F T!! Cover, Knight wins!

Winner: LA Knight, by pinfall

And that’s 2-0 against The Miz! No excuses, either, because this was a normal referee! Knight gets the mic, and after hearing the fans chant for him, he says “LEMME TALK TO YA! From the day I set foot in SmackDown, I told everybody, I said I am coming for gold! So I look at the top of this mountain here in the WWE, and I see all the different options. And I gotta tell ya, it doesn’t matter if it’s Rey Mysterio, it doesn’t matter if it’s Gunther, it doesn’t make a difference if it’s Seth Rollins, and it damn sure doesn’t matter if it’s Roman Reigns!” Fans like the sound of that part!

Knight wants us to understand, this ain’t a catchphrase. He is easily top two, and he ain’t ever second place, YEAH! Because whose game is it? With everybody saying, “L! A! KNIGHT! YEAH!!” The Mega Star wants to be the Mega Champion, who will he get after first?

Paul Heyman & Solo Sikoa are watching this.

And neither looks happy. Heyman looks at Solo and Solo says he will handle this Knight problem, but Heyman wants Solo that order can only come from The Tribal Chief. And the Tribal Chief hasn’t given that order yet. What they need to focus on, with all due respect, is Solo’s brother, Jimmy. Jimmy is cutting deals with Judgment Day, and when that all falls apart, Solo will have to fight that fight. Jimmy is picking fights with John Cena, and when Cena comes around, Solo will have to fight that fight. Jimmy thinks he’s in The Bloodline, and Heyman understands Jimmy’s “in,” but he’s not IN The Bloodline!

They can only make moves like that when The Tribal Chief calls and gives that order. And then, then Solo can handle that business. Solo says he already knows what he needs to do, and he will finish this. Tonight. Heyman fears what that means but he can’t stop Solo from leaving. Heyman hurries to call Roman Reigns, but will Roman be able to call The Enforcer off in time?

Pretty Deadly startle Adam Pearce.

Kit Wilson pushes Elton Prince’s wheelchair in rather fast, but he thanks them for coming by. Pearce sees Elton’s shoulder is healing nicely, so that means they can be back int he ring in no time. In no time? Oh, Elton isn’t so sure, though! He’s a shell of his former self! The memory of Ridge Holland injuring Elton’s shoulder is stuck in his mind, he cannot get over it! The same intensity and clarity of a freshly bloomed flower on a warm Spring day, and yet, he can still hear the sound of his bones breaking, and he can still see that dumb look on Ridge’s dumb face as he smiles at the misfortune! The horror! The horror!!

Pearce doesn’t care about that, but medical says the shoulder is- Wait, if it’s his shoulder, then why is Elton in a wheelchair? The audacity, Pearce! There are some scars you just can’t see! Kit has Elton take a deep breath. Maybe he is being to hard on himself. Maybe with the perfect training regimen, Elton can be back before he knows it, they can be in the ring before they know it, and they will become the best tag team int he WWE! Now give us a “Yes Boy.” Elton pumps up, and they both shout YES BOY~! Elton vows to make his return after all, and they head out. Pearce sighs, when and where will the tastiest comeback begin?

Bayley and Dakota Kai talk backstage.

The Role Model says Iyo Sky has to win next week! Dakota agrees, and that’s why Iyo is off training alone. Bayley says that’s good and all but Bayley planned everything out perfectly from the day they debuted together to when Iyo cashed in that Money in the Bank contract. Iyo hasn’t been 1v1 with Asuka (in the WWE), so Bayley doesn’t know why Iyo challenged Asuka to a match! But Dakota says Bayley will have to be the one to face Asuka tonight. Uh, yeah, easy for Dakota to say since she’s still recovering. Dakota says she still has Bayley’s back, but she’s been so distracted by Shotzi, the real question is: is Bayley ready for Asuka?

Bayley has something to think about that, but little time to prepare. That match is after the break!

The Judgment Day talks backstage.

Rhea Ripley is resting at home after Nia Jax pancaked her, but the boys seem to be handling business. Will they break through to get either Uso on their side? And what about JD McDonagh’s status?

Bayley w/ Dakota Kai VS Asuka!

SmackDown returns as DMG CTRL make their entrance. The bell rings, the two tie up, and Asuka powers Bayley back a few steps. Bayley turns it around but Asuka puts Bayley in the corner. They start shoving, then Asuka SMACKS Bayley! Bayley swings, Asuka ducks but Bayley stomps a foot! Bayley throws hands, whips, but Asuka reverses to wrench, KICK and SOBAT! But Bayley trips Asuka to headlock! Only for Asuka to slip out and wrench Bayley. Bayley rolls, drags Asuka down to a cover, TWO! Bayley avoids a roundhouse! Fans cheer as Asuka stares Bayley down. Bayley uses ropes as defense, then she grabs Asuka’s hair to throw her down!

Bayley throws down fists, drags Asuka up and whips, but Asuka reverses. Asuka runs in, Bayley puts her on the apron, but Asuka ROCKS her back! Asuka goes up, and MISSILE DROPKICKS! Fans fire up, Bayley bails out and Asuka goes to the apron. Asuka runs, Bayley avoids the kick and trips Asuka! Bayley POSTS Asuka and Asuka falls to the floor! Bayley grins and Dakota cheers her on while SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns and Bayley has Asuka in a chinlock. Asuka endures the knee in her back, Bayley smudges the face paint, but Asuka fights her way around. Fans rally, Asuka fights up, and Asuka throws body shots! Fans rally and Asuka JAWBREAKERS free! Bayley still throws Asuka to the apron, to HOTSHOT in the middle rope! Bayley runs to KNEE LIFT Asuka down! Cover, TWO! Bayley grows frustrated and she watches Asuka stand. Asuka staggers, Bayley runs in to sunset flip, but Asuka turns that into an ARMBAR! Bayley flails, kicks around, stacks, TWO! Asuka let Bayley go, and then she ELBOWS Bayley from the corner!

Asuka BOOTS Bayley, runs up, blocks a kick and slips around to GERMAN SUPLEX! Fans fire up for Asuka while Dakota coaches Bayley. Both women are down, they stir, and Asuka sits up first. Fans rally, Bayley runs in but Asuka dodges to then KICK her down! Asuka runs up to ELBOW in the corner! Bayley holds ropes to fight the suplex, and she elbows back. But she runs into a pop-up KNEE! SLIDING KICK! Cover, TWO! Bayley is still in this but Asuka refocuses. Asuka KICKS and kicks but Bayley ducks! Bayley shoves, Asuka mule kicks! Asuka runs up, CODE- NO, Bayley stops that to stomp Asuka down!

Bayley stomps again but Asuka gets that leg! ANKLE LOCK! Bayley scrambles up to her one free foot, and she rolls to send Asuka to a corner! Asuka goes up, FLYING CODE BREAKER! Cover, TWO!! Bayley survives, but Asuka has the ARMBAR!! Bayley scrambles, moves around, rolls, and they end up on the apron. They go to the floor, Bayley hoists Asuka up to FLAPJACK off the apron! Bayley then drags Asuka up and around to RAM her into barriers! Bayley clears off the desk! Fans fire up and Bayley storms back over to Asuka. Bayley drags Asuka up, but SURPRISE! Shotzi is there! Bayley freaks out as Shotzi jumps the barriers!

Bayley runs away into the ring, but Asuka is there now! Asuka gets the arms, backslides, ASUKA WINS!

Winner: Asuka, by pinfall

Shotzi laughs at Bayley, then scares her out of the ring! The Wild Child chases Bayley all the way to the back! Will Bayley ever get over her fears? Shotzi wants a fist bump but Asuka says… Sure. Will The Empress of Tomorrow take her title back next week? Or will the Evil Genius come back with a master plan?

It’s an all new Grayson Waller Effect!

The Dynamite From Down Under, the Moment Maker, the Aussie Icon is already in the ring, and he says he has had the honor of having some great guests on the GWE. Hall of Famers, social media superstars, and men and women who think they’re The GOAT. But that really only fits one person, and that is his guest tonight. Waller is so glad to have this person here. Because despite headlining WrestleMania after WrestleMania, winning championship after championship, starred in Hollywood blockbuster after blockbuster, this star is fading quicker than his hairline. But don’t worry, the rise back tot he top starts tonight, courtesy of the Waller Rub.

Ladies and gentlemen, THE Greatest Of All Time, JOHN CENA! Denver goes wild as Cena makes his way out! Cena can tell, even after everything tonight, Denver still has energy left to give! Cena slides into the ring, fans fire up even more, and even Waller gets in on throwing up the threes. Cena joins Waller at the desk, and Waller says this is like a dream. It must be a real honor for Cena to finally be on the GWE. But when Waller talks to grown-ups, he takes off his hat like his mother taught him. Fans boo Waller being passive aggressive but Waller says he watched Payback. As a host, Waller feels Cena needs some help.

Cena needs some advice because he was out there stealing the spotlight. Cena needs to be more like Waller. Just sit back, and let the stars shine. Cena nods and picks up his mic, but Waller says Cena couldn’t help himself. He had to make it all about Cena one more time. In fact, he got back in the ring. Not as a competitor, no. But as a special guest referee. And then Cena has the audacity to come here and lie to the people! The truth is, we all know it, Cena doesn’t wanna be an in-ring competitor anymore. The truth hurts, right? And there is no doubt that Cena IS the GOAT. But there’s also no doubt that Cena is no longer the greatest today.

Cena hasn’t been the same since Mania, right? When Waller’s boy, Theory, beat Cena! Just like he beat up The Rock here tonight! Fans boo, that is an outright lie. Cena throws his hat off, and then his shirt! Fans fire up and Waller wants Cena to calm down. This is a talk show! Go ahead and speak. Cena composes himself, but here comes Jimmy Uso! Cena is confused but Waller jams out to the music. Jimmy steps into the ring and Cena has a feeling Waller set this up somehow. Waller sits back, just as his “advice” suggested, as Cena steps to Jimmy. But then Jimmy snatches Cena’s mic! Jimmy says Kangaroo Jack has a point!

Jimmy says no one wants Cena here! Nobody! He told him two weeks ago, the fans are all here to see JIMMY USO! Fans boo, that’s a lie, too. They chant for “CENA! CENA!” Jimmy says sure, they love Cena here. But if Cena tries to embarrass Jimmy like he did two weeks ago… If not, then get the hell outta Jimmy’s ring. But before Cena can respond, here comes Solo! Heyman walks with Solo to the ring, still not sure what Solo is planning on doing. Solo gets in the ring with Jimmy, Cena and Waller, but goes right up to Cena! Jimmy says okay, okay! Jimmy says 2v1, what’s Cena gonna do now?

But then Solo grabs Jimmy! And prepares the thumb!! But then he SUPERKICKS Cena!! It was a fake-out! Waller applauds and Jimmy smiles. Fans boo but Jimmy wants a high-five. Solo just throws hands on Cena! So Jimmy joins in with stomps! But here comes AJ STYLES! Styles has beef with The Bloodline so he runs in to fire off on Jimmy! Solo goes after Styles but then Cena fires off on Solo! Cena TOSSES Solo, Styles PELES Jimmy! Cena says “YOU CAN’T SEE ME!” FIVE KNUCKLE SHUFFLE! And then Jimmy staggers up into a fireman’s carry! Heyman says save Jimmy so Solo drags Jimmy out of the ring!

Fans boo the Bloodline, but then cheer as Cena & Styles stand tall. They high-five, will they be united in taking down what’s left of The Bloodline? What will The Tribal Chief have to say about this?

My Thoughts:

A very good episode for SmackDown here, with a great surprise to open the show! Pat McAfee and The Rock putting Theory in his place was some wild stuff, definitely a moment to remember. Great opener with Styles VS Finn, but natural move for Jimmy to screw Styles over. I did like Finn trying to recruit each Uso so that they’d have one on each brand, and good reaction from Heyman to that. Of course Jimmy interrupts the Grayson Waller Effect since Cena’s there, and then Solo and Styles getting up, that could be a really interesting tag team match for Fastlane, to mostly take some of the pressure of Cena getting back in action like this.

Also good stuff of Solo not happy with Knight winning the rematch against The Miz. To be fair, I was surprised it went down like that, but I suppose they don’t need to extend the feud to Fastlane. Knight wants a title, he names all the names, not just SmackDown’s, but you can bet Knight will want his shot at Roman more than anything else. LWO had a good segment to point things towards Rey VS Escobar, and then good promo from Lashley & The Profits to set up a tag match. I’m rather shocked it only got so much screentime, but I bet the match had to be cut short because of the opening segment with The Rock’s “You Are An A-Hole” going long. I would think Lashley faces whoever wins in Rey VS Escobar.

Great bit out of Pretty Deadly with Elton being so dramatic, mostly so Kit can reencourage him. They’ll have a fun little return, and sounds like they’ll keep their feud with The Brawling Brutes going. Then great stuff in the ongoing DMG CTRL stories. Iyo being away “training” is a nice little touch, and Bayley VS Asuka was great stuff. Shotzi showing up to scare and cost Bayley was just what Dakota was worried about, and I would think we get Bayley VS Shotzi soon, though maybe not on Fastlane. Iyo VS Asuka next week is going to be great stuff, though that makes me think this women’s title will be off Fastlane so there’s room for the women’s world title.

My Score: 8.7/10

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Launched in 2017, the Chairshot Radio Network presents you with the best in sports, entertainment, and sports entertainment. Wrestling and wrestling crossover podcasts + the most interesting content + the most engaging hosts = the most entertaining podcasts you’ll find!

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Mitchell’s AEW Rampage Results & Report! (9/15/23)

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Andrew’s IMPACT #1000 Results & Match Ratings: 9.14.2023

Coverage

Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Match Results & Ratings: 9.19.2024

Victory Road was damn good, but behind us now. So let’s see how the build for Bound for Glory starts!

Published

19 hours ago

September 19, 2024

Andrew Balaz

Well hot damn, Victory Road was a solid night of action, surprises and an overall enjoyable watch. Even with the major let down segments of SDL and the Knockouts Tag, they were placed right in the middle…so there was energy aplenty for the last four matches. We do get to see where they’re going with Bound For Glory in about 6 weeks.

My fantasy booking has The System, ABC and Hardyz heading towards a championship 3 way dance. DeMALISH is done, so at least Masha is back on the singles circuit. Lets hope she makes short work of Lish and/or Tasha.

Time to see where the early steps take us on the way to Bound for Glory.

.@mashaslamovich LIVES A DREAM teaming with @MATTHARDYBRAND and @JEFFHARDYBRAND TONIGHT on iMPACT!

Subscribe to TNA to watch #TNAiMPACT NOW: https://t.co/UOkcaGoNH4 pic.twitter.com/N08dnmuwPv

— TNA Wrestling (@ThisIsTNA) September 20, 2024

Ratings:

First Cla$$ (KC Navarro & AJ Francis) vs Sinner & Saint ( Judas Icarus & Travis Williams): First Cla$$ win via Down Payment/Frog Splash combo – ** 1/4
Matt Cardona vs Rhino: Cardona DQ’d – My time wasted
Knockouts Tag Championship: Spitfire (Dani Luna & Jody Threat) (c) vs Kendal Grey & Carlee Bright: Spirefire retains via Pressure Drop – * 1/2
Texas Death Match: JDC vs Mike Santana: Santana wins – ** 3/4
Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & Tasha Steelz w/Alisha Edwards vs Masha Slamovich & The Hardyz: Hardyz win via Twist & Swanton combo – *** 1/4

Results:

Lish talks smack, Masha comes out, Lish says she doesn’t even understand her – AND FINALLY – Masha speaks English. So she runs down Lish, says she’s sick of her but Tasha jumps Masha from behind. Lish grabs Kendra, attacks Masha and we see Tasha and Lish beatdown Masha until Jordynne makes the save for Masha. The System comes out to tip the numbers game, but then The Hardyz come out to save Masha and Jordynne.

Santino’s goofy music hits and I guess we’re heading to the 3×3 since Lish is still injured. Masha Slamabitch and the Hard Boyz will fight Tasha and System boys. Arianna’s music hits before Santino can say something to Jordynne, and she declares Jordynne gets an NXT friend next week to fight Rosemary and Wendy Choo. I just like Santino and Arianna playing together. It’s wholesomely moronic.

First Cla$$ (KC Navarro & AJ Francis) vs Sinner & Saint ( Judas Icarus & Travis Williams)

KC and Travis start off, KC hits some athletic counters, taunts a little and extends the hand but Travis turns it into an Arm Whip, tags in Icarus, they Double Team, AJ blind tags as KC rope runs, Spiderman pose in the ropes, AJ levels Icarus, KC takes out Travis, hits the tandem move The Deposit, into Tennessee Whiskey. KC tags back in, Snapmare into Footstomp and a near fall before AJ tags back in. They go for a tandem move on Icarus in the corner, but Icarus dumps KC to the outside, turns a Suplex into a DDT, and then crawls to Travis for simultaneous tags as Travis is working KC over. KC powders, tries to change sides but Sinner and Saint tandem redirect the dive. Inverted Suplex for a near fall.

AJ comes in, Lawn Darts Icarus into Travis, Down Payment, Frog Splash from KC…and First Cla$$ win!

Matt Cardona vs Rhino

Obviously just a step towards the eventual PCO versus Cardona, prolly at Bound for Glory. So this match is useless and Cardona has no reason to lose.

Cardona tries to pick his spot, but just gets his Foot picked out of mid air, and Rhino throws Cardona around the ring, Lariat, sets up for a Gore…but Cardona powders. Rhino follows and Suplexes Cardona onto the ramp, throws him back in and a Throat Chop from Cardona finally gives him some space. Missile Dropkick for an unnecessary pinfall, and then just grinding the Forearm into Rhino’s face in the corner. 10 Count Punches turned into a Powerbomb from Rhino for 2.

Rhino goes to get a chair, the ref admonishes him, Rhino throws the chair in, Cardona uses it in front of the referee and gets DQ’d. Radio Silence on Rhino after the DQ, Cardona looks to continue the punishment but lights go out and PCO attacks. Chokeslam, goes for the PCO-Sault, but Cardona powders and runs away. PCO goes full Ric Flair, attacks the chair and then PCO-Saults a steel chair.

Well…that’s new.

Knockouts Tag Championship: Spitfire (Dani Luna & Jody Threat) (c) vs Kendal Grey & Carlee Bright

You know how I’ve said these titles are useless right? Now they’re being defended against…no one. Bright Grey? That’s not even a Crayola Crayon color. I think I would enjoy constipation more than this match.

Jody and…Grey?… start and its just slow, headlocky, I guess trying to get across Grey’s amateur background, but it looks terribly…meh. Dani tags in and now my attention is peaked. Powerbomb attempt but Grey tries to slip it into a Cradle, Dani kicks out, catches Grey and Sack of Shit into Kip Up. Tandem Stalling Suplex after the tag, but only 2. Dani gets tagged in, they don’t seem to be taking Grey super seriously, so Grey finally kicks off and gets the tag to Bright. Okay, Cartwheel Knees is unique offense, not the Cheerleader Back Handspirng, I can respect that. Oh nice Standing Moonsault from Bright. Grey tags in, Jody takes a few seconds too long for the “blind tag”, Senton off the ropes to kill the two NXT girls, Pressure Drop, title retained.

Burn these belts and push Dani as a singles.

Texas Death Match: JDC vs Mike Santana

Jade looks like she’s cosplaying Peg Bundy during the intros but…ya know…not complaining. And it sounds like they’re doing the rules correctly with pinfall and then 10 count. So, that’s nice the rules seem to be clear.

JDC tries to attack Santana as he comes in from the crowd, Santana turns it around as expected and starts running JDC from corner to corner, Enzuigiri and multiple Bootwash corner spots. Santana looks for a Cannonball, but JDC powders, so Santana stalks a little, Tope con Hilo connects! Santana finds some chairs as the morons start chanting for tables when it’s 4 minutes in. That chant just screams inbred and stupid anymore.

Santana puts the two chairs back to back and looks to hit the old Eddie Kingston spot on JDC, but JDC fights it off, 10 count punches that JDC counters with the Powerbomb through the back to back chairs. Trash can and kendo stick time for Dango. Dude, Stomp is soo 1999 but its apparently cool in Texas. DOWN AND DIRTY on the trash can from JDC! But he can’t cover since now he’s selling his own pain for dropping on a can. Santana smartly powders and JDC tries to remember how to walk. Santana crawls up to his feet bleeding, but he also found a Barbedwire Bat! Dango tries to grab him, BAT TO FACE! Of course they head to a commercial right as the match gets bloody…sigh.

So we’re back and they’re fighting in the crowd, or no, some staging area about the crowd. Dango is bleeding, Santana is bleeding, Santana counters Dango and hits a Piledriver on the stage for 2! Brawling up some steps, JDC kicks off Santana and connects with a Tornado DDT for 2! Santana rolls over and flops off the stage as he crawls to…somewhere. JDC with the low speed pursuit, he finally charges and gets tossed into some broken barricade makeshift something! Santana slams a production case into Dango a few times, as Dango tries to crawl up a table to get away. Santana walks back up to the stage, and stops himself mid-charge. FINDS A LADDER. Santana gets the ref and someone else to hold it, goes to the top of the ladder…and Splash through JDC on the table.

Takes entirely too long, so while it looks cool its pretty stupid. 1-2-3, the pinfall happens, but lets see if the 10 count holds. 10 count goes through, Santana wins.

Moose attacks afterwards and just beats the tar out of him with a chair.

Lei Ying Lee debuts NEXT WEEK on #TNAiMPACT!

Subscribe to TNA to watch iMPACT NOW: https://t.co/UOkcaGoNH4 pic.twitter.com/kHtnOSs0Gj

— TNA Wrestling (@ThisIsTNA) September 20, 2024

Hendry comes out, Kaz interrupts, Nic Nemeth basically agrees to fight everyone. So Santino makes it shot and succulent, and decides for Hendry and Kaz to have a number 1 contender match next week. Nothing of crazy merit was said during the promo, so I decided to take Santino’s directions and go for short and succulent.

Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & Tasha Steelz w/Alisha Edwards vs Masha Slamovich & The Hardyz

Well right after intros they cut to a commercial, so maybe we won’t get anymore. Tasha and Masha start off, and throw fists fast, things stay close and they trade. Masha gets the advantage after a Drop Toe Hold into the middle rope, kick to the face, running knees and Tasha tags out to Eddie. Masha doesn’t care she wants to fight Eddie but Eddie cheap shots Matt on the apron and Matt tells Masha to tag him in. So Eddie doesn’t look like a completely shitty heel, and the crowd pops for a Hardy.

Matt chokes Eddie along the ropes, Leg Drape attack and tags in my name is Jeff. A little classic Hardy tandem work, Myers just runs in, stack the dorks, Splash version of Poetry in Motion. System gets Lariated out, Tasha tries to attack Matt but Masha eats Tasha. Whips her 3 times into corners and Poetry in Moscow. All of the System is on the outside, so Masha goes to the top, Senton off the top rope and Bowling Balls The System. Ugh…picture in picture is awful…stop with commercials at bad times. I really miss the commercial free YouTube version.

So to no one’s surprise, of course The System take control during the distraction break, Masha is being isolated, Eddie tags in and he’s taking his sweet time for a chop. So again, Eddie doesn’t make contact. Masha drops Tasha, ducks the men, hot tag to Jeff! Jeff lights up Eddie, looks for Whisper in the Wind but Myers pulls Eddie out of the way and Jeff hits nothing. And unlike Jinder, Eddie didn’t bump to a breeze. Eddie tags out to Myers, Russian Leg Sweep and Front Face Lock is keeping Jeff down. Jeff fights back up, but Myers clocks him. Myers tags in Tasha, and Tasha goes with the Knife Edge Chops on Jeff, mocks the Jeff dance, then twerks in his face before tagging Eddie back in.

Myers attacks Matt off the apron and even Masha, but Jeff starts to fight back, goes for the Whisper again, and this time connects on both! Jeff tags in Matt, so he starts working through the System boys. Neckbreaker into the Delete Headsmashes for both members of the System. Side Effect on Myers for only two. Matt calls for the Twist, the crowd responds well, but the Twist is countered, Lish grabs Matt’s foot but the referee sees it. EJECTION! Poor Tami-Lynn, she doesn’t wanna go, Hardys and Masha laugh and sing the Hey Hey Hey song, Lish says no so the ABC walk down and pick her up and carry her out. Twist of Fates for everyone, Swanton Bomb from Jeff, Hardyz and Masha win!

Overall Score: 6/10

Serviceable in regards to setting up most of the threads for Bound for Glory. The actual wrestling could’ve been a lot better, but for a starting point, it could’ve been worse. Xia Li getting her new name revealed, which I like. Some kind of Thunder reference, mixed in with the fact her vignettes give Mortal Kombat vibes, its very cool. The Knockouts Tags definitely feel like useless metal, Santana and JDC was probably better to experience in person, because the commercial break broke the momentum…and Gods damn was that finish sooo slow. At least the Texas Death Match rules were correct.

Crowd was also hot for the Hardyz, so the combination of “evil Russian” dropping the accent and proving to be a Hardy fangirl and get the Hardyz babyface rub sets up Masha nicely. She should be the next face of the Knockouts Division.

Next week we’ll hopefully get a touch more clarity or reasons for multi-person shmoz matches. But reasons are reasons, and this moved in logical enough directions.

About Chairshot Radio Network

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CHAIRSHOT RADIO NETWORK PODCAST SPECIALS

Attitude Of Aggression Podcast & The Big Five Project (chronologically exploring WWE's PPV/PLE history)

TheChairshot.com PRESENTS...IMMEDIATE POST WWE PLE REACTIONS w/ DJ(Mindless), Tunney(DWI) & Friends

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Coverage

Mitchell’s ROH Results & Report! (9/19/24)

Is Dark Order good enough?

Published

23 hours ago

September 19, 2024

Steven Mitchell

Team Texas meets Dark Order on the Proving Ground!

Dustin Rhodes & Sammy Guevara need challengers for the ROH World Tag Team Championships, so Evil Uno & Alex Reynolds are put to the test! Will they last the necessary ten minutes?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

ROH Women’s World TV Championship Proving Grounds: Red Velvet VS Allysin Kay; Velvet wins and denies Allysin a title opportunity.
The Gates of Agony VS Dante Leon & Trip Jordy; The Gates of Agony win.
Preston Vance VS Brandon Cutler; Vance wins.
John Silver w/ The Dark Order VS KM; Silver wins.
Rachael Ellering VS Maggie Lee; Rachael wins.
The Infantry w/ Trish Adora VS Spanish Announce Project; The Infantry wins.
Anthony Ogogo w/ Shane Taylor VS Kit Sackett; Ogogo wins.
Brian Cage VS Deonn Rusman; Cage wins.
ROH World Tag Team Championships Proving Ground: Dustin Rhodes & Sammy Guevara VS Evil Uno & Alex Reynolds w/ John Silver; Dustin & Sammy win and deny The Dark Order a title opportunity.

PLAY BY PLAY

ROH Women’s World TV Championship Proving Grounds: Red Velvet VS Allysin Kay!

The Chef is cooking, and she even whipped up a new look for the belt! Will Velvet have the whole women’s division seeing red? Or will AK say pinkies out as she eats up this dish?

The Code of Honor is upheld with a pinkie swear, and the two circle. They tie up and Allysin shoves Velvet down. Velvet gets up, dodges Allysin, and wags a finger. Allysin runs up again, Velvet slides under, then she ducks ‘n’ dodges to tilt-o-whirl RANA! The fans fire up and Velvet fires off body shots in the corner! Velvet lets off, but then comes back to stomp high and low. Velvet lets off to dig her boot in! The fans cheer as Velvet does the splits and stirs it up. Velvet lets off as the ref counts, then she comes back to fire forearms. Velvet runs, wheelbarrows, but Allysin says no to the bulldog, WHEELBARROW GERMAN! Cover, TWO!

Allysin drags Velvet up to TOSS her to a corner, then CHOPS her! The fans fire up, Allysin CHOPS again. Allysin bumps Velvet off buckles, Velvet hits back, but Allysin fires her own body shots. Then a fireman’s carry to a SAMOAN DROP! Cover, TWO! Allysin drags Velvet up, Velvet fires body shots of her own again! Velvet runs, but Allysin catches the crossbody! FALL AWAY SLAM! Cover, TWO! Velvet toughs it out but Allysin drags her back up. Velvet fires more body shots, Allysin shoves her away, but Velvet runs up. Allysin sidesteps and runs, Velvet CALF KICKS, but Allysin deflects it! Then she gets an ANKLE LOCK!

Velvet endures as Allysin twists the foot. The fans rally, Velvet reaches out, ROPEBREAK! Allysin lets go at 4, then storms back up. Allysin snapmares Velvet, and clamps on with a straitjacket stretch! Velvet endures, even as Allysin digs a knee into her back. The fans rally up, Velvet fights up, and Velvet arm-drags free! Velvet runs up, to tilt-o-whirl and IRON OCTOPUS! Allysin endures, the fans rally, and Allysin powers right into a gut wrench! But Velvet clicks her heels, slips free, and hits a STUNNER! Velvet runs, but into a SPINEBUSTER! Cover, TWO!! Velvet survives and Allysin grows frustrated.

Allysin drags Velvet up and in, Canadian Rack into the Gory Especial, but Velvet sunset flips it! TWO, and both women stand! Velvet LARIATS, but Allysin stays up! Velvet runs again, and she LARIATS again, but Allysin wags her finger. Velvet tries again, ducks Allysin’s lariat and LEAPING LARIATS! Then she CALF KICKS! Allysin falls, Velvet roars and the fans fire up! Velvet runs, wheelbarrows, and STUNNERS! Allysin falls back, Velvet goes after her at the ropes. The fans rally, Velvet pumps up and runs, to DOUBLE KNEE! Velvet YANKS Allysin off ropes, rolls with her, and dragon sleepers! JUST DESSERTS! Cover, Velvet wins!

Winner: Red Velvet, by pinfall (denies Allysin Kay a title match)

A solid win from The Chef, and she tells Diamante that she has the blood of a fighter! Eat, sleep, breathe, wrestling! Will everyone be served up some hot, fresh L’s in Red Velvet’s kitchen?

The Dark Order speak.

Dustin Rhodes wants more championships, and it makes Evil Uno sick! Alex Reynolds says that greed will lead to Dustin’s downfall. The funny thing about this Proving Ground is that The Dark Order has nothing to prove. Dustin & Sammy have to show they can beat The Dark Order in 10 minutes. All Dark Order has to do is beat the clock, and then unlike Dustin & Sammy, the Dark Order will earn a title opportunity. Dark Order is ROH, and they vow to get both revenge, and those ROH World Tag Team Championships. Will Evil Uno & Alex Reynolds show the world #DarkOrderisGood enough?

The Outrunners speak.

Truth Magnum tells The Iron Savages, “You wanna attack The Outrunners from behind?” Turbo Floyd & Erica Leigh shake their heads. But they don’t call him The Truth for nothing! And the truth is, if you’ve got beef, here are two Grade A master chefs, and they’re running hot! Keep your “savage sauce,” because you’re looking two young men absolutely jacked to the gills on “best-tosterone!” Turbo says the Savages have a few things he can respect: their muscles; their tans; their glitz; but they ain’t got no glamour! That’s what The Outrunners have! And in ROH, if you want it, let him tell you: Any time, any place!

Because if you haven’t seen The Outrunners, you haven’t seen nothing yet! Erica barks, but will Truth & Turbo find they’re barking up the wrong tree?

The Premier Athletes speak.

Mark Sterling says, “Whoa, whoa, hold on. Do you recognize this man? Of course you do. Because over a million of you saw him do the most impressive wrestling move you’ve ever seen in your life. But did you just see the move and scroll past it? Or did you actually think about who was the man that did the move? I’ll tell you who that man is. This is Josh Woods, National Champion, 108 collegiate wins, four-time All American! And there’s more where that came from.” Woods says he can do that to anybody. Anytime, anywhere. Then when and where will we see the Technical Beast do that for some gold?

The Infantry w/ Trish Adora VS Spanish Announce Project!

While Shawn Dean & Carlie Bravo have made amends with The Outrunners, they’re still aiming at the ROH World Tag Team Championships. But that just means they’re one of many, because the reinvigorated Angelico Y Serpentico want their shot! Who rises up the ranks with a win while the other falls in Sioux Falls?

The teams sort out and #BadNews&Tattoos starts against the South African Stud. They shake hands for the Code of Honor, and Bravo gets an “OORAH!” going. Bravo and Angelico circle, the fans rally, and the two tie up. Angelico wrenches, wristlocks, but Bravo reaches down, slips around, and he wristlocks back. Bravo says they’re really wrestling and the fans have a laugh. Bravo keeps on the wrist, but spins, opens the hold, then steps over for a modified cording hold! Then Angelico wrenches the other wrist, but Bravo rolls, handsprings, pops ‘n’ locks and he gets Angelico with that vibe! Then Bravo reels Angelico in for a headlock!

The fans cheer, but Angelico powers up and out. Angelico drops, then hip tosses, but Bravo spins through it to arm-drag! The fans cheer again, Bravo eggs Angelico on, ducks the haymaker, but Angelico ducks the backhand. Bravo ducks the roundhouse, jumps the sweep, and dropkicks cancel out! Angelico spins to his feet while Bravo kips up, and both men Bernie Lean and walk it out! The fans cheer, and the two tag to The Captain and #SNAKEMAN. The fans “OORAH!” with Bravo again, and Dean shakes hands with Serpentico. They tie up, Dean headlocks, but Serpentico powers out. Dean runs Serpentico over!

The fans rally as Bran says Dean is so strong. Things speed up, Dean hurdles but Serpentico ducks ‘n’ dodges to RANA! The fans fire up but Dean is on his feet. Dean runs up, but into BOOTS! Dean tries again but Serpentico RANAS! But then Dean arm-drags! And arm-drags again! And DROPKICK! The fans fire up and Dean brings Serpentico up. Dean wrenches Serpentico, tags Bravo, and The Infantry double whip. DOUBLE HIP TOSS! A rough landing for Serpentico, but Infantry DOUBLE FIST DROP! Angelico storms in, Dean blocks a kick, hands it to Bravo, then ENZIGIRIS Bravo slips around to hit a NECKBREAKER!

The fans fire up while Angelico bails out. Serpentico slowly rises, Bravo brings him up, but Serpentico headlocks. Bravo powers out but Angelico tags in. Serpentico ducks Bravo and Angelico scoops to BACKBREAKER! Angelico stands Bravo up, Serpentico runs in, NECKBREAKER DROP BACKBREAKER COMBO! Cover, TWO! Bravo stays in this but Angelico stays on him with a cording hold. Bravo endures, the fans rally up, and Bravo fights up, only for Angelico to knee low! Tag to Serpentico, SAP double whip, then they both drop. Bravo is very surprised by that but clears them both. Angelico hip tosses Bravo, then SAP ZENMAI! Cover, TWO!

The fans rally as Bravo stays in this. Serpentico drags Bravo up, tags Angelico back in, and SAP mugs Bravo. Angelico stomps Bravo while Adora rallies the fans with “Let’s Go, Bravo, Let’s Go!” Bravo CHOPS Angelico, Angelico KNEES low! Angelico JABS Bravo, wrenches and lifts, BIG back suplex! Cover, TWO! Angelico keeps Bravo down by bending his arm against a knee. Bravo endures, the fans rally, but Angelico top wristlocks. Bravo fights up, fires body shots, but Angelico ROCKS him! Angelico stalks Bravo to ropes, brings him up, and then wrenches. Angelico back suplexes, but Bravo lands out! Bravo reaches out, but Angelico keeps him back!

The fans rally, and Bravo BACKHANDS Angelico away! Hot tags to Dean and Serpentico! The fans fire up as Dean rallies on SAP with LARIAT after LARIAT! Then he floats on Angelico to DDT! Kip up, and he gets Serpentico, spin and “SONIC BOOM~” LARIAT! The fans fire up while Serpentico goes to a corner, and Dean says, “OORAH!” The fans echo “OORAH!” and Dean ELBOWS Serpentico! Bravo tags in then follows Dean as he takes Serpentico side to side. Buckle bump and a BOOT, then Dean goes back to a corner. Bravo bumps Serpentico off buckles again, and Dean runs in to LEAPING LARIAT!

The fans fire up while Dean lands safe on the apron, and Bravo scoops Serpentico to MICHINOKU DRIVER! Cover, TWO!! Serpentico survives and Bravo is stunned! Dean calls for Boot Camp and he tags in. Dean hooks Serpentico up, Bravo runs, but Angelico trips him! Angelico drags Bravo out to UPPERCUT, and Serpentico snapmares Dean. Serpentico mule kicks, ROCKS and SUPERKICKS! Angelico steps in to clinch and FLATLINER! Serpentico goes up, FROG SPLASH! Cover, TWO!! Dean survives and SAP is shocked! The fans rally up but SAP drags Dean up. SAP coordinate, Angelico runs, but Bravo trips Angelico up!

Bravo drags Angelico out now, and ROLLING ELBOW! Serpentico ROCKS Dean, runs, but Bravo returns! Infantry dodges Serpentico to fire off the Captain & Bucky combo! Then DOUBLE ROLLING ELBOWS! The fans fire up with The Infantry, and they hook Serpentico up again. Time for BOOT CAMP!! Cover, Infantry wins!

Winners: The Infantry, by pinfall

SAP put up a fight, but The Infantry are marching up towards the top of the rankings! Bravo says never fear, the Infantry is here! But will they be armed and ready for a title shot in the near future? And perhaps best of all, The Infantry offer the Code of Honor, and SAP takes it!

Shane Taylor Promotions speaks.

Anthony Ogogo says it is so good to be Anthony Ogogo! The skull-crackin’, jaw-jackin’ Gov’nah is back in ROH! Shane Taylor himself says it’s great to have him back. Ogogo says he was in Paris for the Olympics, watching the very best athletes win gold. But brother, it got Ogogo thinking. It’s time for him to win gold in ROH! Shane likes that, too. Shane says a wise man once said, “First you get the money, then you get the power.” Around here, winning gold is both! And STP is gonna start taking every championship ROH has to offer. AEW is where the best wrestler, but ROH is where the baddest rumble! Will Ogogo and Big Bad Shaney T. soon join Lee Moriarty as champions of ROH?

ROH World Tag Team Championships Proving Ground: Dustin Rhodes & Sammy Guevara VS Evil Uno & Alex Reynolds w/ John Silver!

Dustin is a double champion here in ROH, and that’s all the reason The Dark Order needed to despise him! But will they be able to bring down The Natural & The Spanish God? Or will Team Texas be riding high in South Dakota?

The Code of Honor is tentatively upheld, but Reynolds does go and push Sammy. The teams sort out and Sammy starts against Reynolds. The fans rally as the two circle, but then Reynolds bails out. Sammy is annoyed, the fans boo, but Reynolds reminds us, the Dark Order doesn’t even need to beat the champs, just last the ten minutes. Silver and Reynolds high-five, the fans rally for Sammy, and he waits on Reynolds. Reynolds takes his time returning, and then Reynolds tags Uno. And Uno tells Sammy, “I want this guy!” He points at Dustin, Sammy points at Dustin, and the fans fire up as Sammy tags Dustin!

Dustin and Uno circle, they approach, but then Uno bails out to troll Dustin. Uno does a sarcastic victory lap, but Dustin cuts him off. Uno says whoa, hold on, only to turn around and see Sammy! The fans cheer but Uno runs away into the ring! Team Texas grabs at him, knocks him down, and then Uno gets up into an UPPERCUT! Sammy hooks Uno up, Dustin joins in, DOUBLE RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Sammy kips up, Reynolds runs in, but into a DROPKICK! Sammy kips real smooth, and then he tells Dustin to dive! The fans fire up, Dustin fires up, and while Dark Order regroups, Team Texas builds speed!

But then Dark Order scurries away, Sammy & Dustin put on the brakes, and the fans boo. Sammy spins and poses, so Dustin busts out the spinarooni! Dustin poses, too, and the fans fire up! The Dark Order gets mad, but turnabout is fair play. The Dark Order decides to just bail, but Dustin chases them down! Dustin SMACKS Uno, ROCKS Reynolds, then gets Silver to back off. Dustin UPPERCUTS Uno, SMACKS him off the apron, then stalks him around the way. Dustin puts Uno in the ring, but Reynolds storms up. Dustin counter punches! Uno distracts the ref, allowing Silver to POST Dustin! The fans boo and Silver protests, but Reynolds throws hands on Dustin.

Reynolds puts Dustin in, Uno bumps him off buckles, and he stomps a mudhole. Tag to Reynolds, the Dark Order mugs Dustin, and Reynolds snapmares Dustin. Reynolds steps on Dustin, then uses the ropes to IMPLODER ELBOW DROP! Cover, TWO! Reynolds keeps Dustin from Sammy, bumps him off buckles, and tags Uno. The fans rally, Uno CHOPS Dustin, then he soaks up the heat. Uno goes back to Dustin, but Dustin UPPERCUTS! Reynolds grabs Dustin but Dustin ROCKS him! Dustin fires more shots on Uno, but Reynolds barks at Dustin. So Dustin DECKS Reynolds! But he turns around into a kick from Uno!

Uno runs, but he runs into the SNAP POWERSLAM! The fans fire up while both men are down! Uno crawls to his corner, but there’s no Reynolds! Dustin crawls, but Silver distracts the ref from the hot tag! The ref stops Sammy, not knowing what happened, and then Uno BOOTS Sammy! Uno SPLASHES Dustin, bumps him off buckles, and Reynolds goes up. Uno sets Dustin up for a FLYING DOUBLE STOMP! Reynolds then DIVES onto Sammy! Uno hits a PILEDRIVER on Dustin! Cover, TWO!! Dustin survives and Uno is shocked! Another cover, TWO! Uno grows frustrated but we’re five minutes in, time is still on their side.

Uno calls to Reynolds, brings Dustin over, and tags Reynolds in. The Dark Order mugs Dustin, but Dustin fights back with big hands! But then Dark Order pushes Dustin back! Dustin dodges Uno, dodges Reynolds, and the ref sees this hot tag! Sammy goes up to DOUBLE CROSSBODY The Dark Order down! The fans fire up, Sammy CLOBBERS Uno, then keeps moving to duck ‘n’ dodge Reynolds so he can CLOBBER him, too! The fans fire up as Sammy kips up, and Sammy RAMS in to Reynolds! Sammy goes to the apron to ENZIGIRI Reynolds, and he SUPERKICKS Uno! Reynolds then springboards in, but Reynolds gets under!

Reynolds runs up, into a CUTTER! Dustin runs in to add a SHINING WIZARD! Cover, Uno breaks it! Dustin storms up, Uno shouts “STOP~!” Then he ROCKS Dustin with a right hand! But Sammy JUMP KNEES Uno! Uno tumbles out, Sammy goes for Reynolds, but Silver drags him out! The fans boo as Dark Order regroups again. Sammy says that’s fine, and he builds speed, to FLY! Down goes The Dark Order! Sammy puts Reynolds in for Dustin to hop on, DESTROYER! Dustin brings Reynolds up, Sammy climbs, and we get a FINAL RECKONING, into the SWANTON BOMB! Cover, Team Texas wins!

Winners: Dustin Rhodes & Sammy Guevara, by pinfall (denies The Dark Order a title match)

Uno & Reynolds played not to win but to not lose, and that only backfired every step of the way! But wait! THE CAGE OF AGONY ATTACKS! The fans boo, but Brian Cage fireman’s carries Sammy, for an F5!! The Gates mug Dustin, The Dark Order cheers while the fans boo! Kaun & Liona hold up the tag titles, then they stand Dustin up, for the DOUBLE LARIAT SANDWICH!! Dustin falls over, is this just a foreshadowing of what is to come? Or can Dustin & Sammy survive the gauntlet of challengers?

My Thoughts:

A very good episode of ROH, with it coming in at an hour and 10 minutes. It still had a lot of matches that were easily filler, but I again commend them on giving everyone good showings. A little surprised, and maybe a little disappointed, that Harley Cameron did not appear to go after Rachael Ellering. They could get that story going if they really wanted but they sure drag things out. But I do like that a big development was Red Velvet changing the belt, the red strap looks so good with the dark silver ROH uses for their belts. We just need them to hurry up and give us Velvet VS Diamante, not sure what they’re waiting on.

Sterling’s promo with Josh Woods was itself basically filler, because we already went through the phase of “Let’s hype The Premier Athletes up.” Just get Woods going in the Pure Division so he can eventually face Lee Moriarty, and maybe even give us some STP beating up on Tony Nese & Ariya Daivari. Speaking of which, after Ogogo of course “knocked out” his opponent tonight, good promo from him and Shane. STP is a team I’d definitely like seeing pull of the “dripping with gold” trope. Moriarty has the Pure Championship, the whole crew can be Six Man Champs, and I suppose Ogogo can “knock out” Atlantis Jr. to get the TV title while Shane finally beats Mark Briscoe to get the world title.

And a lot of good stuff is cooking in the Six Man as well as traditional Tag Divisions. We got a very good match from Infantry and SAP, and a very good promo from Outrunners calling out The Iron Savages. And while we got a really good tag match out of Dark Order and Team Texas, I figured Team Texas would win out. Clearly, Cage of Agony wants next, but I would think Kaun & Liona have a better chance getting the World Tag titles than the whole faction does the Six Man titles. Cage of Agony, while they were Mogul Embassy, already had a dominant run with the Six Man belts, let another faction have their time.