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Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (12/18/23)

I’m dreaming of a GOLD Christmas!

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‘Twas the Raw Before Christmas…

… and all over the show, champions and challengers are going toe to toe! An Intercontinental and two tag team fights, that’s THREE championship matches on one Monday night!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Miracle on 34th Street Fight: R-Truth VS JD McDonagh; Truth wins.
  • WWE Intercontinental Championship, Miz’s Last Chance: GUNTHER VS The Miz; Gunther wins and retains the title, Miz can no longer challenge him.
  • WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships: Chelsea Green & Piper Niven VS Kayden Carter & Katana Chance; Carter & Chance win and become the new WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions.
  • Ivar w/ Sarah Logan VS Akira Tozawa w/ Maxxine Dupri; Ivar wins.
  • Jey Uso w/ Kofi Kingston VS Ludwig Kaiser w/ Giovanni Vinci; Jey wins.
  • Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championships: Finn Balor & Damian Priest w/ Rhea Ripley VS The Creed Brothers; Finn & Priest win and retain the titles.

PLAY BY PLAY

The Judgment Day is here!

The fans boo as Finn Balor, Damian Priest, Rhea Ripley, Dominik Mysterio & JD McDonagh all make their way to the ring ahead of their very busy night. The stage is set for the Irish Ace facing R-Truth in a Miracle on 34th Street Fight, but first, Damian Priest welcomes us to Monday Night Raw. And more importantly, ALL RISE for The Judgment Day! The fans boo instead. Finn tells the Creed Brothers, “Congratulations, boys. You earned it. You ran the gauntlet and become the #1 contenders to face me and my good man, Damian. For you, the biggest match of your career. For you, probably the biggest night of your life.

“But for us, it’s just another night at the office. Because you’re stepping in the ring with the only TWO-TIME Undisputed WWE Tag Team Champions of the World!” Rhea says, “And Ivy Nile… Run your mouth again, and I’m gonna make what I did to your little friend, Maxxine Dupri, pale in comparison to what I do to you. Because it is  as simple as this: The Judgment Day, we ran 2023! And we are gonna continue to run 2024!” Dom starts but the fans boo even louder. Dom still says The Judgment Day runs ALL of the WWE! But then here comes Truth! And he wants them all to hold on! They left him behind!

He didn’t know they were opening the show! He loves opening the show. Des Moines, what’s up!? Welcome to Monday Night Raw! The fans cheer and JD tells Truth, “What the hell are you doing down here” Uh, he’s in Judgment Day, dawg. Priest & Finn keep JD cool, but Truth says last week’s beatdown was initiation, right? But he will say, not one to complain, but they kinda crossed the line. A lot of those- er, ALL of them, hurt. Physically and emotionally. And DP, he knows you didn’t mean that when you said you don’t like him. Truth saw it in Priest’s eyes. JD says if it’s getting hurt Truth is worried about, then get outta this ring right now.

Fans boo but Truth says look. Everyone is looking for a fight, right? Rhea wants to beat up Ivy, Finn & DP want to beat up on the Creeds, so Truth needs someone to beat up on! And he looks at JD. Fans fire up for these two, and Truth is seeing the trees, the lights. There’s a lot of animosity here, right? So let’s squash the beef and be a happy family. But they’ll do this as a Miracle on 34th Street Fight. Truth, that was already made official last week! It’s happening! Oh, okay. “Siri, how far is 34th Street?” Truth… This match is happening in this ring, right now! And for the last time, you are NOT in The Judgment Day!

Truth isn’t if he loses. But JD won’t be if he loses! So this is a LOSER LEAVES JUDGMENT DAY MATCH! No! That’s not how- Priest says hold on. Rhea tells him no but Priest likes the idea. The fans do, too! Rhea says forget it. JD says it doesn’t matter, Truth needs a miracle to win anyway. Then let’s do this! WHAT’S UP!? The fans are all fired up, and the others get out of the ring, who (supposedly) gets kicked off the team?

Miracle on 34th Street Fight: R-Truth VS JD McDonagh!

The bell rings, JD storms up but Truth TACKLES JD! Truth fires hands, JD gets up, but Truth ducks and kicks low. Truth runs to SCISSOR- NO, JD dodges, ROCKS Truth, and kicks him at the ropes. JD bumps Truth off buckles, Dom gets him a kendo stick, and JD digs boots in. JD takes the stick takes aim. JD jumps the stick, kicks low and hits the SCISSOR KICK! Fans fire up and Truth takes off his belt! Fans fire up as Truth SPANKS JD out of the ring! Truth goes out after JD, SMACKS him off the Christmas cookies, then stalks behind. JD CHHUCKS a tree! Truth dodges, then hands him a gift, to BOOT it into his face!

Truth drags JD up, Dom coaches JD but Truth puts JD in the ring. Truth hugs it out with Dom, but then Dom POSTS Truth! Fans boo Dirty Dom being a Scrooge, but Raw goes to break.

Raw returns, Truth throws body shots to get out of a chinlock, then he ROCKS JD! Truth whips JD to a corner, runs in and SPLASHES! Truth then hits a BIG hip toss! Cover, TWO! JD is still in this but Truth says he has an idea. Truth goes out to fetch a TABLE! The fans are loving it but Dom shouts to JD to get up! Truth slides the table in but JD WRECKS him with a dropkick! Fans boo but JD drags Truth up and puts him in the ring. JD storms up on Truth, KICKS him in the side, and fans chant “JD SUCKS!” JD whips Truth, Truth BOOTS back! But Dom trips Truth into JD’s jingle bells! Dom apologizes, then drags Truth out.

But Truth whips Dom into steel steps, and then Dom falls into the tree! Truth uses the fire extinguisher to BLAST JD! JD flails and flounders, and Truth sets up the table! The fans fire up, Truth positions the table just right, and then goes back for JD. JD swings but Truth counter punches! And again! Truth then dodges to flying shoulder! Truth shouts out his childhood hero, John Cena, with the SPIN OUT BOMB! And of course “YOU CAN’T-” JD KICKS Truth from below! But Truth comes back to CALF KICK! Truth resets, “YOU CAN’T SEE ME!” FIVE KNUCKLE SHUFFLE! Truth then fireman’s carries and aims for the table!

Fans fire up but JD flails free! JD shoves, runs in, but Truth TOSSES him out! Truth goes out the side, grabs the Christmas tree and brings it around, to CLOBBER JD with! JD flounders, Truth puts him back in the ring and brings him to the table. Truth sets JD on the table, goes up the corner, and fans fire up! But JD hops off to ROCK Truth first! JD climbs up, he and Truth throw hands, and then JD HEADBUTTS! Truth falls back, fans boo, but JD sits Truth back up, ripping at the shirt. But Truth SPEARS JD down through the table!! Truth is just on top of JD for the cover, and Truth WINS!

Winner: R-Truth, by pinfall

Even Truth can’t believe it! Truth won and is “still in the Judgment Day!” But will Truth really have his Christmas wish and replace JD in the most dominant faction on Raw? Or will the fun and games be over after tonight?

 

Kayden Carter & Katana Chance speak.

They ask Chelsea Green & Piper Niven if they feel that. Do they feel the storm that’s coming? Because if they don’t, they will soon. These two are under the electric sky, and will become the NEW WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions! And guess what? Chelsea & Piper, your time is up, and it is time to party! WOOP WOOP! Will KC Squared truly be the life of the party after tonight?

 

Nia Jax is here!

The Irresistible Force refused to give The Man her grudge match, because Becky Lynch needs her more than she needs Becky Lynch. But then what does Nia plan on doing next? We find out, after the break.

Raw returns and fans boo as Nia has the mic. But before she can say anything, BECKY is here! The fans fire up as Becky makes her way down to the ring, but Nia storms her way out. Becky gets herself a mic to ask where Nia’s going. Is she scared? She has a mic in her hands, so surely she has something to say. Was it about Becky? Because she can just say it to Becky’s face now. Nia says as much as she would “love” to break Becky’s face again, she has more important matters to deal with. Because before Becky so rudely interrupted, Nia was going to announce that she’s entering the Women’s Royal Rumble.

Oh, great. And the fans don’t care. But maybe they care that she’s here. No? Well, maybe they care that Becky’s here! The fans cheer that. In fact, The Man has come around to Des Moines, and she came here looking for a fight! The fans also cheer that. Nia asks if Becky knows why they’ve never fought. It’s because “they” (management) is afraid of what Nia would do to Becky. Fans boo that, but Nia says face it. Becky is the moneymaker of the company. And if they were to go 1v1, that would end. Look at Becky! She’s the size of Nia’s leg! Nia would literally squash Becky and break her all over again. Is that what she wants?

Becky says Nia has it right, she is the moneymaker. But that is because she will fight anyone, any time, anywhere! So it isn’t “they” who stop this, it is not “they” who are afraid, it is Nia. Because Nia’s entire existence here has been on the back of someone else’s name. First, it was her bloodline. Now it is Becky. Because while Becky goes down as the greatest to ever do it, Nia’s only claim to fame is that she broke the nose of the greatest to ever do it. And so Nia doesn’t want this fight because that all goes away. Then there’s no “woman who made The Man,” just “the woman who lost to the greatest to ever do it.”

But if Nia wants to prove Becky wrong, just fight her right here, right now! Alright, fine! Get a ref! Right now! Let’s go! A ref appears, Nia huffs and puffs her way back, and the fans are all fired up! Nia gets in the ring, but then steps right back out! Fans boo and Nia says, “See how badly you want this? You’re not gonna get it.” Fans boo more but Nia says this happens on HER terms. In fact, this happens in HER hometown of San Diego! Nia VS Becky in two weeks, at Day One. And after Nia breaks Becky and she’s in the hospital with her little daughter, she’ll be saying, “Mommy, why’re you uglier than usual?” And that’s because Nia broke Becky’s face.

Nia taunts Becky as she walks away, but Becky rushes out to attack! Becky jumps on and fires fists! The fans fire up, security rushes out and they pull Becky away, but Nia CLUBS Becky down! Fans boo as Nia leaves, but will the first day of 2024 be the last day Nia runs her mouth?

 

“Kofi Klaus” visited the arena!

Before the show, he gave out free toys and merchandise to the fans, and even did some holiday twerking. Kofi Klaus is now in the back and he sees DIY! What would they like for Christmas? Well, they’d love the tag titles. Is there a match in there somewhere? No, but here’s a Jey Uso YEET shirt! Oh, Gargano’s son loves Jey! How’d Kofi know? Kofi Klaus always knows! HO HO HO! DIY then moves on to find The Miz preparing for his title match. The Miz sings the theme song, “WE ARE~ WE ARE~! D I Y! M I Z!” Not bad. But while they’ve all had their differences in the past, last week was great. Gargano and Miz shake hands, but Ciampa says no.

Ciampa says it wasn’t great. It was awesome. They shake hands now, and Jackie Redmond walks over. DIY heads out and Jackie says the Intercontinental Championship means so much to Miz. Is he feeling any pressure going into this title match knowing it is his last chance against Gunther? Miz brings up how a few weeks ago, he said we won’t know who Gunther really is until he’s at the bottom of the mountain. But that boulder at the top of the mountain sure seems sturdy. But the foundation is cracking, Imperium is at odds, and the first time we saw a hint of personality was when Miz rattled him!

“The man who is ‘just an entertainer’ ROCKED his foundation, and pushed him to the brink of losing the one thing that makes him interesting.” So Miz plans on finishing what he started by becoming a NINE TIME Intercontinental Champion! So you ask, is there added pressure? Why not ask the man who never wants to face Miz again if there’s any added pressure. With that, the Hollywood A-Lister heads out. Will this be the end of the series? Or just a new beginning?

WWE Intercontinental Championship, Miz’s Last Chance: GUNTHER VS The Miz!

Raw returns and Der Ring General makes his entrance. The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see if this is truly a skull-crushing finale!

The bell rings and the two circle. The fans rally up, the two tie up, and Gunther hits a headlock takeover. Miz fights up, puts Gunther on ropes, and the ref counts. Gunther turns things around on Miz, lets off with pats on the shoulder, then dares Miz to bring it. The fans boo, the two tie up again, and Gunther trips Miz, has the legs, but Miz scrambles to the ROPEBREAK. The ref counts, Gunther lets off and smirks. The two reset and the fans rally up more. They tie up, Gunther powers to a clinch and puts Miz on ropes. The ref counts, Gunther lets off, but Miz avoids the chop to CHOP! And KICK! And KICK!

Gunther blocks a kick, CHOPS Miz down, and grins as he looms over Miz. Gunther eggs Miz on, soaks up heat, but Miz drags Gunther down! HEEL HOOK! Gunther moves around, Miz rolls to shift, DECK Gunther, and tie up the legs in an INDIAN DEATHLOCK! Miz puts pressure on the hold but Gunther CHOPS! Miz stays on the hold, stands with it, and he throws down forearms! The fans fire up as Miz fires off! Miz then stands with the deathlock, he eggs Gunther on, and then Miz falls back to SNAP the lock! Gunther flails, reaches out, crawls back, ROPEBREAK! Miz lets go and Gunther even kicks from below.

Miz BOOTS Gunther out of the ring! The fans fire up was Miz runs, but Gunther avoids the dropkick to CHOP Miz down! Gunther hauls Miz up, reels him in, but Miz fights the bomb! Gunther tries again, APRON PNOWERBOMB! Miz sputters and fans boo while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and fans fire up as Miz fires haymakers on Gunther! Miz runs, but Gunther BOOTS him down! Miz flops to the apron, sits up in a daze, but Gunther soaks up the heat and mocks the massive nuts. Gunther sits Miz up to KICK! Gunther eggs Miz on, KICKS him again, and Miz winces. The fans rally for Miz, Gunther drags him up, and whips him to ropes. Miz ROCKS Gunther with a forearm! Miz runs to ROCK Gunther again! Miz keeps moving, Gunther CHOPS him down! And KICKS him in the back! Gunther grins as Miz writhes. Gunther looms over Miz, taunts him, “I told you, you do not belong with me in this sacred ring.”

Gunther kicks Miz around while calling him a wannabe. Gunther eggs Miz to get back up, then kicks him around. Fans boo, Gunther sits Miz up to CHOP him down! Miz shakes his head, refusing to stay down. Miz sits up but Gunther brings Miz around, to CHOP! Miz CHOPS back! They CHOP back and forth! Gunther then UPPERCUTS Miz to a corner! Gunther grins, perhaps amused by this fight now. Gunther kicks and knees Miz around in the corner! The ref counts, Gunther lets off and paces. Fans boo but Gunther just soaks it up. Gunther storms up on Miz, and whips him corner to corner. Gunther runs in to CHOP!

Gunther whips Miz corner to corner again, runs back in, but Miz BOOTS him! And BOOTS again! Miz runs in, A-LIST LARIAT! Miz shoves Gunther away, the fans fire up and Miz climbs! SPRINGBOARD CROSSBODY, but Gunther catches him! Gunther puts Miz on the top rope to CHOP! And Gunther climbs up to STAND on Miz! The ref counts as Miz is bent back! Gunther lets off at 4, to CHOP again! Miz flops to the floor, crawls around the way, but Gunther storms out after him. Fans boo but Gunther storms up on Miz, to CHOP POST! Gunther clutches his hand, he and Miz have to hurry back into the ring, and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and fans rally as Miz endures a sleeper! Miz fights up, pries the hold open, and he gets that bad hand! ELBOW BREAKER! ELBOW BREAKER! And then a KICK to the arm! Another KICK! Another KICK! Gunther blocks, trips Miz, and works to turn Miz over! Miz CLUBS the bad arm, pulls on the hand and twists the wrist! Gunther shirts to STF! Then he throws down elbows! CRAVAT STF!! Miz endures, reaches out, claws at the mat, then claws at Gunther’s bad hand! Miz wrenches the arm and hits a BASEMENT DDT! Both men are down and the fans fire up! Gunther shakes the bad hand and goes to ropes.

Miz rises, the fans fire up, and Miz blocks the chop from the left hand! Another DDT! Gunther is dazed and the fans fire up again! Miz feeds off the energy as Gunther goes to ropes. Miz runs in, ducks ‘n’ dodges and tilt-o-whirls to DDT! Cover, TWO!! Gunther survives and clutches the bad hand. Miz keeps his cool, and he stands to stomp the bad hand! And again! Miz ROCKS Gunther with haymaker after haymaker! Miz wraps the arm around the ropes and pulls! The ref counts, Miz lets off to run, but into a SHOTGUN! Gunther hauls Miz up, GENERAL BOMB! High stack cover, TWO, but into the BOSTON CRAB!!

Miz endures, the fans are thunderously behind him, and he fights his way around! Miz reaches out, Gunther’s bad hand loses grip, Miz gets the ROPEBREAK!! The fans fire up as Gunther lets go in frustration. “This is Awesome!” and Gunther storms up on Miz. Gunther kicks Miz around, pie faces him, and Miz sputters. Gunther CHOPS, and CHOPS, and then eggs Miz on. Miz eggs Gunther on! Gunther drags Miz up, but Miz SLAPS him! Gunther grabs Miz for a SLEEPER! Body scissors, but Miz rolls back, TWO!!! Gunther reels Miz in, Miz fights and the bad arm gives up! Miz BOOTS and SKULL CRUSHNIG FINALE!!! Cover, TWO!!!

Gunther survives and Miz can’t believe it! The fans fire up as Miz rises again, they want that “One More Time!” Miz KICKS Gunther, KICKS him again, and runs, but Gunther LARIATS!! Gunther powered through the pain, and now he goes up top! But Miz is up to ROCK Gunther first! Miz climbs up after Gunther, the fans fire up, but Gunther throws body shots. And CHOPS! But then Miz KICKS the bad hand! Miz climbs up again, brings Gunther in, full nelson and SUPER SKULL CRUSHING FINALE!! But Miz can’t make the cover! He has to crawl over, and Gunther rolls away!! Gunther rolls to safety and fans can’t believe it! Miz can’t believe it!

The ref counts, Miz goes out after Gunther and puts him back in quickly. Miz hurries in, but right into a GENERAL BOMB!! Gunther isn’t done there, he manages a ripcord and LARIAT!! And then Gunther hauls Miz up, gets him up again, GENERAL BOMB!! High stack, Gunther wins!!!

Winner: Gunther, by pinfall (still WWE Intercontinental Champion)

Just as Miz found a way to weaken Der Ring General, Der Ring General finds a way to survive against The Miz! And now, Miz can NEVER challenge for this title again, so long as Gunther is the champion. And at this rate, will anyone else ever be Intercontinental Champion?

 

Gunther regroups with Imperium.

They applaud his grand victory, and Ludwig Kaiser says it was a joy to watch. Congratulations. Gunther says that as far as he understands, these two have no reason to be jolly. He’s the only one contributing! The whole last year for them was a complete write off. As he deserves, as the legendary champion he is, he is going to step away for a few weeks to recharge. You two stay and grind! Work hard! And finally impress him. Carry on. Der Ring General has given his orders, and in comes Kofi Klaus! Why the long faces, boys? What’s wrong? Kofi, stop. They don’t have time for this nonsense. Pack up y our little presents and get out of here.

Ho-ho-hold on a minute, guys. Just because Gunther Claus put you on his naughty list doesn’t mean you can take it out on everyone else. Even so, Kofi has a gift. Look. Open it up. Ludwig unwraps the gift, and it’s COAL! HAHA! Ludwig throws the coal away and gets in Kofi’s face. Ludwig & Vinci back away, and Kofi says yeah, what’d you think was gonna happen? You gotta be nice the whole year round! Let that be a lesson to you! Kofi knows when they’ve been naughty and when they’ve been nice, so be good for goodness sake!

 

Shinsuke Nakamura has a story book ready.

It’s The American Nightmare Before Christmas! Nakamura reads: “‘Twas the week before Christmas, and out from my mouth, came a warning to Cody that Shinsuke would pounce. While your daughter is nestled all snug in her bed, and visions of championships dance through your head, Shinsuke is plotting to live out your story, to ruin your plans and extinguish your glory. The Nightmare is over, the Nightmare is through. The mist burns its eyes, for the Nightmare is you! You bastard, you cancer, you prancer, you nitwit! You’re vomit, you’re stupid, you’re father was inbred! My goal is to see that you’re living in fright. Merry Christmas to you, I will be your last fight.”

The King of Strong Style tells Cody- WAIT, CODY FINDS HIM! Cody attacks Nakamura and smack shim off the walls! And then they go out into the rest of the backstage area! Into the road cases, body shots and forearms, then out to the crowd! Fans fire up but security rushes in! Cody pushes through them to continue after Nakamura but now Nakamura hits back! Nakamura snarls, Cody gets loose and ROCKS him! Security drags Cody away and Nakamura flounders to ringside. Cody powers up to RAM the security into barriers! Cody goes up the barriers to AX HANDLE Nakamura down! Then Cody clears the desk!

Security hurries to get Nakamura out of there, but Cody is in the ring! Cody DIVES onto them all! Fans fire up as Cody brings Nakamura back to the desk, SMACKS him off it, then climbs up onto it! The fans are thunderous for Cody as he hauls Nakamura up! But security saves Nakamura! Nakamura gets away, grinning all the way. Fans want to “LET THEM FIGHT!” but when and where will we see this rematch?

 

Adam Pearce talks with Akira Tozawa.

He wants to make sure they’re both on the same page. Is Tozawa saying 100% this is the match he wants? Tozawa says, “Let’s do it!” Tozawa heads out, will he get whatever it is he wants? As for Pearce, Chelsea & Piper storm in and Chelsea asks why he hasn’t been returning her calls. Is he seriously making them defend their titles against Kayden & Katana? Wait, no. Since it’s the holidays, maybe he could find it in his tiny heart to cancel the match. Please? They’re not feeling well. Pearce tells them that yes, it is the holidays. So no, they still have to. Ugh, Pearce is such a Scrooge! Well, this Scrooge says the match is next, so get to the ring.

Way to ruin Christmas, Pearce! They’re talking to Aldis! Bronson Reed then storms in. He hears Pearce has plans for determining Gunther’s next challenger. He does. Then let’s talk. Pearce agrees to that. Will the Colossal Aussie get in on whatever kind of match Pearce has planned?

 

WWE Women’s Tag Team Championships: Chelsea Green & Piper Niven VS Kayden Carter & Katana Chance!

The Hot Mess & Scottish Viper want to be champions without putting in the work, and that’s just not how this works. But Christmas is about giving, not receiving, so will KC Squared give the champs an L for the holidays?

Raw returns and the champs make their entrance. The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and we see who gets to put gold under the tree!

The teams sort out and Kayden starts against Chelsea. They tie up, Chelsea hits a headlock takeover, but Kayden headscissors. Chelsea kips free, but Kayden hits the takeover. Chelsea headscissors then CLUBS away on Kayden. Fans boo but Chelsea steps on Kayden. Chelsea takes a bow, then whips. Kayden reverses but Chelsea SLAPS her! Chelsea whips, Kayden ducks under and trips Chelsea, to swivel the hips. Fans fire up, Chelsea runs in, but then blocks Kayden’s hip toss. Kayden blocks Chelsea’s hip toss to arm-drag! And DROPKICK! Chelsea flounders to ropes, Kayden tags Katana. They trip, dropkick, and slingshot SENTON! Cover, TWO!

Chelsea scrambles away to tag in Piper. Fans fire up as Piper and Katana circle. Piper BLASTS Kayden, Katana dodges her, and Katana ducks the boot! But Piper grabs Katana to send her to the corner. Katana slips out, ducks under, slingshots around, and keeps moving, but Piper CLOBBERS her! Fans boo but Piper drags Katana up to scoop. Katana slips free, tags Kayden, wheelbarrow BULLDOG and the springboard SHOTGUN! Piper flounders, Katana tags back in. They get Piper up but Chelsea anchors Katana. Katana kicks Chelsea down but Piper shoves Kayden into her! Piper then has them both down, goes up, DOUBLE VADER BOMB!! Cover, TWO!!

Piper & Chelsea are surprised but Katana is still in this, and Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Piper runs in, but Katana avoids the cannonball! Chelsea tags in and hurries to swing on Kayden. Kayden dodges, then so does Katana, hot tag to Kayden! Kayden runs up to CLOBBER Chelsea! And again! Kayden SPLASHES Piper, too! Then she dodges Chelsea, kicks the legs out and SUPERKICKS! Piper staggers, and Kayden hits a DROPKICK SPLASH COMBO! Cover, but Piper rebounds, so Kayden moves, the SPLASH squashes Chelsea!! Fans fire up as Piper panics! Kayden SUPERKICKS! Kayden runs up to BOOT WASH Chelsea! Then IMPLODER LEG DROP! Cover, TWO!

Kayden is stunned but she refocuses. Chelsea goes to a corner, Kayden hoists her up top. Kayden climbs up after Chelsea, fans fire up, and Kayden goes to suplex. But Chelsea throws hands! Chelsea HEADBUTTS Kayden, leaps, but Kayden gets under! Chelsea comes back, ROUGH RYDER! Cover, TWO! Kayden survives and Chelsea is furious! Another cover, TWO! Chelsea is beside herself, and she drags Kayden up. Chelsea brings Kayden over, tags Piper, and they reel Kayden in to double suplex, only for Kayden to fight free! But she runs into a COCE BREAKER SENTON COMBO!! Cover, KATANA BREAKS IT!

The fans fire up and Chelsea is fuming! Chelsea whips, Katana reverses and sends Chelsea out! Piper hauls Kayden up, scoops, but Kayden slips free to SUPERKICK! Piper is down, Kayden positions her and tags Katana. Katana goes up, they combine, KEG STAND SPLASH!! Cover, CHELSEA BREAKS IT!! Chelsea almost didn’t get that in time! Kayden runs in, but Chelsea gets around to GERMAN SUPLEX! Chelsea drags Piper to the corner, tags in, then gets Katana up. Chicken wings and- NO, Katana slips out to CODE BREAKER in return!! Tag to Kayden and they reset! AFETR PARTY!!!! Cover, KATANA & KAYDEN WIN!!!

Winners: Kayden Carter & Katana Chance, by pinfall (NEW WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions)

Get the drinks and the glow sticks, it’s time to party! Chelsea was right to be afraid of these two, because she and Piper just lost their titles! Will every night be pumping with Kayden & Katana leading the Women’s Tag Division?

 

Ivy Nile works out with The Alpha Academy.

Ivy does box push-ups and gets to 100! Incredible! She’s ready for Rhea! And Maxxine thanks her for having her back. No problem. Ivy heard what Rhea had to say, so that’s why she asked Pearce for a match with Rhea. Because Ivy’s goal for 2024 is to become the NEW Women’s World Champion. But she’s gotta go, she has to support The Creeds in their title match tonight. Ivy heads out and the Academy wishes her luck. And that ambition is so good! Gotta love when someone chases down challenges. But then Tozawa says speaking of challenges…! He’s all fired up as he has his match tonight.

What? With who? HIM…! IVAR?!? Ivar chuckles and Sarah Logan ushers him along. Gable says that when he told Tozawa to go big, he didn’t mean that big. Yes, Tozawa understands. Does he? ARIGATOOO~! Oh boy. Is Tozawa even going to make it to the New Year at this rate?

 

Katana & Kayden are buzzing backstage.

The other ladies of the division are there to applaud, and then Kofi Klaus walks in! He’s excited to see the NEW W! W! E! Women’s! World! Tag! Team! CHAMPIONS~! But a quick question: what would they like for Christmas? They already got what they wanted. Okay, that’s true. See you later. Kofi heads out, Katana & Kayden say that dreams really do come true. With that said, let’s go party~! Indi & Candice are all for that. But Natalya, Nox, Shayna & Zoey hang back. Natty says since they have new champions, they’ll need new challengers. Shayna says that’s just what she was thinking. Will the Queen of Harts & Welsh Firecracker or the Queen of Spades & Hunter be next in line?

 

Ivar w/ Sarah Logan VS Akira Tozawa w/ Maxxine Dupri!

Raw returns and Tozawa makes his entrance, the Alpha Queen by his side. The bell rings and Maxxine coaches Tozawa on. Tozawa fires up, runs in, and fires off! Ivar shoves Tozawa away but Tozawa comes back with more! But then Ivar TOSSE Tozawa out! Tozawa gets up, runs back in, SOBAT, SPIN, SLIDE, SPIN KICK! “A THANK YEW~!” The fans fire up but Ivar blocks the whip. Ivar whips Tozawa, runs in, but into BOOTS! Tozawa goes up and leaps, but Ivar catches him! Tozawa still RANAS Ivar into buckles! Tozawa goes up again to leap, but into Ivar’s arms! Maxxine says this is okay, but Ivar pops Tozawa around.

Tozawa slips out the back, waistlocks, but Ivar bucks the O’Conner. Tozawa slides under, ducks ‘n’ dodges, pop-up SATELLITE DDT! The fans are fired up as Tozawa pumps a la Otis! Tozawa runs corner to corner, into the SEATED SENTON! Ivar snarls and checks his chin. Ivar then goes up the corner, fans boo, but Ivar hits the WARBEARD- FLOP as Tozawa moves!! The fans fire up with Tozawa and he rips the shirt! Mostly. Nope, all the way! Tozawa hurries up top, but Sarah distracts! The fans boo, but Maxxine YANKS her down! Maxxine remembers Sarah’s tactics from before, but Sarah remembers the humiliation!

Sarah shrieks and chases Maxxine, but Maxxine sends her into barriers! “A THANK YEW~!” Then Tozawa stands, for the TOKYO TOWER SENTON!! Cover, TWO?!? Ivar is still in this and Maxxine thought Tozawa had this! She coaches Tozawa back up, and he runs in, into the HEEL KICK OF DOOM!! Tozawa is turned inside out, but Ivar isn’t done! Ivar goes up the corner again, but Tozawa trips him! Ivar lands on his Viking long boat! Tozawa hurries up to GAMANGIRI! And then he positions Ivar just right, climbs up after him, and SUPER STEIN- NO! Ivar stops that, hoists Tozawa up for a SUPER POWERSLAM!! Cover, Ivar wins!

Winner: Ivar, by pinfall

Tozawa did go big, but maybe too big! Ivar wins out, will Ragnarök come to 2024?

 

Seth Rollins is here!

Iowa’s favorite son is home for the holidays, and the fans sing his song! “OH~ OHH~ OHHH~!” The World Heavyweight Champion may be wearing a Grinch colored leather jacket, but he’s in a great mood as always as he swaggers into the ring, gets the mic, and revels in the fans singing along. “DES MOOOOINES~! Welcome to Monday… Night… Rollins!” And sing it, because he is a Visionary, he is a Revolutionary, he IS Seth FREAKIN’ Rollins! And things around here have been heating up for this Iowa boy. And after his little “confrontation” last week, Rollins is feeling more motivated than he ever has to continue to be the BEST WORLD CHAMPION in this entire industry!

And if you thought 2023 was something, wait until you see what they do in 2024! And that starts with Day One Raw, when Rollins defends his World Heavyweight Championship against Drew McIntyre. The fans boo Drew, but Rollins says now now. Say what you want about McIntyre, but at Crown Jewel- Wait! Here comes McIntyre! Rollins sets the belt down and unbuttons the jacket as McIntyre storms into the ring. McIntyre gets a mic but Rollins says before McIntyre even says anything, Rollins hasn’t forgotten that headbutt so tread lightly! McIntyre says he isn’t here to fight. They’ve got their match on Day One, so he’s here to tell Rollins he is proud of him.

McIntyre says there are so many people turning a blind eye, kissing arse when it comes to CM Punk, but not Rollins. Rollins looked Punk right in the eye and told him the truth as it needed to be said. That, my friends, is a real leader. And look at Rollins! He’s on top of the world as champion, on a roll heading into the holiday season, in front of his home crowd and they’re all singing his song. The fans again sing, and McIntyre says it must feel good, huh? World Heavyweight Champion gets to go home and spend time with his family. Recently, McIntyre’s been in a lot of self-reflection, talking about his own family lately, the sacrifices made.

McIntyre had a chance to go home not long ago. He started to see things he didn’t like, started to feel a certain way, started to feel… guilty. He started to see his family getting older, and after 16 years, for the first time ever, McIntyre questioned if this is all worth it. He was sure Rollins couldn’t relate to that, but perhaps he can. Rollins has someone he shares his life with, his wife is in the exact same boat as McIntyre. All the way across the world from her home, chasing her dream, doing what she can, sacrificing every single week and that time with her family. Rollins has been part of those conversations, and maybe had some of his own.

Surely he had the “good” conversations, like wishing to be back for a wedding or something, but there’s the big show coming up and they can’t let the fans down. And the “difficult” conversations, like when a family member is ill. McIntyre’s mom, and her dad, and all they want do is be by their side and hold them. But then the family tells them no, don’t you dare stop. Keep chasing the dream and make it happen. That is what they did. And then suddenly, those loved ones aren’t here anymore. McIntyre tries not to get emotional as he tells Rollins to look him in the eye. McIntyre doesn’t want the title, he NEEDS it!

McIntyre needs the validation of knowing that all these sacrifices were worth it! That the hurt caused wasn’t for nothing. And McIntyre is willing to hurt Rollins for everything. he will do whatever it takes to take that title at Day One. Fans boo but Rollins says here’s the thing. He doesn’t think we know entirely how to feel about McIntyre. Because McIntyre says things like that, Rollins wants to take it to heart and believe. But as of late, McIntyre’s actions and words haven’t lined up. So Rollins doesn’t know whether to believe him or call him out on his crap. But he’ll say this: Rollins respects McIntyre.

Because after Crown Jewel, McIntyre said he would find a way back, would work his way into another opportunity at the title, and he’s done that. But Rollins wants to know. As much as McIntyre needs this, what makes him think the outcome will be any different? McIntyre says he’ll do whatever it takes, that he ‘s not the same person, so what does that mean? He’s willing to cheat? To lie? To hurt people? To take shortcuts? Is that what it is? Yeah, McIntyre has changed. But in many ways, he’s the same. He still wants to point fingers at everyone else. Still wants to shift the blame! McIntyre will do whatever it takes, except the ONE thing that he needs to do! To take responsibility for your actions!

McIntyre needs to look himself in the mirror and face the hard reality that the only person keeping Drew McIntyre from being world champion is Drew McIntyre. Rollins stood in this ring last week, looked a man right in the eye and told him he hates him. Rollins meant that. Rollins is looking McIntyre in the eyes and doesn’t hate him. Rollins pities McIntyre. Merry Christmas, see you in a couple weeks. Rollins drops the mic and heads out. But McIntyre drags him back in! Rollins ROCKS McIntyre, then dodges him to SUPERKICK! McIntyre tumbles out of the ring, Rollins DIVES onto him! Rollins rains down fists, but McIntyre THROWS Rollins into barriers!

McIntyre storms up on Rollins, fires hands, fans sing the song but McIntyre says he doesn’t need anyone’s pity!! McIntyre then gets Rollins up in an Inverted Alabama, for an INVERTED ALABAMA SLAM onto the steel steps!! Rollins writhes and clutches his arm! The fans boo but McIntyre shows no remorse. Will Rollins be ready in two weeks for that golden grudge match?

 

The Creeds get ready for their match.

Time to make dreams come true! Cody Rhodes walks over and shakes their hands. He thanks them for last week. Julius says he can count on them any time. Cody appreciates that. And Cody hopes the Creeds drag Judgment Day around for him, and that they leave as champs. Brutus thanks Cody, and then both Brutus & Julius are hyped up! Will they be able to bring gold back to the Diamond Mine?

 

Kofi Klaus returns to ringside!

He has another round of free merchandise for the fans! Shirts fly through the sky, but then Imperium attacks! These Grinches beat up on Kofi in the ring! Fans boo as they mug Kofi, then hit a BIG back suplex! They even rip the beard away! Vinci rains down fists, but here comes JEY USO! Jey runs up to fire off haymakers! Fans chant “YEET! YEET!” with every shot! Jey DECKS Vinci, DUMPS Ludwig, and then FLIES out onto them both! Jey stands tall and the fans fire up! Jey helps Kofi to his feet, and Jey calls out Ludwig! “I want you, pretty boy! Let’s go!” Fans fire up for this one, will it be a Merry YEETMAS here tonight?

Jey Uso VS Ludwig Kaiser w/ Giovanni Vinci!

Raw returns and the match is on! Ludwig headlocks but Jey powers up and out. Ludwig runs Jey over, fans boo, but things speed up. Jey drops down, CLOBBERS Ludwig, then ROCKS him with haymakers! The fans chant “YEET! YEET! YEET”! Jey ROCKS Ludwig more, then whips him corner to corner. Ludwig reverses, Jey goes up and over, then UPPERCUTS! Fans fire up, and they join in on “UCE! OH! UCE! OH!” Jey runs, but into a LARIAT! Ludwig snarls, talks trash, and drags Jey around. Ludwig rains down fists, the fans boo, but Ludwig lets off. Ludwig has Jey on ropes, CHOKES him, but lets off to then KICK Jey.

Ludwig taunts Jey, clamps on the chinlock, and he even digs an elbow into Jey’s face! Ludwig ELBOWS Jey down, then stalks him to the corner. Ludwig stands Jey up, whips him to ropes, then CLOBBERS Jey! Fans boo Ludwig while Jey flops out of the ring. Jey gets back in but Ludwig clamps on with a facelock. Ludwig CLUBS Jey, CLUBS him again, but Jey fires hands again! The fans “YEET!” and Jey whips, but Ludwig reverses. Jey hits buckles hard and falls over! The fans boo Ludwig as he flexes. Ludwig stalks Jey to a corner, CHOKES him on the ropes, but lets off as the ref counts. Vinci gets a cheap shot in! Ludwig covers, TWO!

Ludwig paces around, drags Jey up, and Ludwig grins. Fans rally with “UCEY! UCEY!” Jey kicks, Ludwig blocks and even ducks the dragon whip! Ludwig runs up to clothesline Jey up and out! The fans boo, Ludwig runs in to UPPERCUT Jey down! Imperium looms over Jey as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Jey fights up while Ludwig has a chinlock. Jey fires body shots, shoves Ludwig, but Ludwig UPPERCUTS! Jey PELES on return! Both men are down and the fans fire up! Vinci coaches Ludwig, but Jey sits up first. Jey blocks a punch to give a punch! And again! Jey fires off, “YEET! YEET! YEET!” Jey pops ‘n’ locks and p uts some stank on the HAYMAKER! Fans fire up as Jey whips, but Ludwig reverses. Jey slips out of the pop-up to mule kick, uppercut, kick, but Ludwig says “NEIN!” But the DRAGON WHIP hits! And then the HIP ATTACK! Cover, TWO! Ludwig stays in this but Jey stays focused.

Jey drags Ludwig up, reels him into a fireman’s carry, but Ludwig claws the eyes! Ludwig shoves and fireman’s carries, ROLLING DEATH VALLEY! Cover, TWO! Ludwig is stunned, and he seethes as he looms over Jey. Ludwig gets Jey in a clinch, but Jey slips free to shove and SUPERKICK! Fans fire up as Jey goes up top! But Ludwig gets the ref to check him, Vinci SHOVES Jey down! Ludwig runs up, GAMANGIRI! Cover, TWO!! Jey is still in this and the fans fire up! KOFI KLAUS is back! TROUBLE IN PARADISE for Vinci! The fans fire up, Jey dodges Ludwig and SPEARS!! Jey goes up, USO SPLASH!! Cover, Jey wins!

Winner: Jey Uso, by pinfall

As if Gunther wasn’t disappointed in his men before, they just got beat by Main Event Jey and Kofi in a skinny-fat Santa costume! But the WWE Universe is bouncing with Jey, will 2024 be the Year of YEET?

 

The Judgment Day regroups.

Priest is laughing, and the others can’t help but grin. JD actually lost to Truth. Dom says it could be worse. Remember when Orton RKO’d him off the cage? Or when Priest had JD by the neck and pinned him to the wall? Rhea says enough. When one of them loses, it reflects badly on them all. Priest says yeah, that makes sense. But tonight, the stipulation was clear. JD lost, he’s out of the group! What? That wasn’t a real stipulation! Truth can’t just make matches! Oh, so it’s JD who does? No… Priest dares JD to say what he wants to say. JD says he meant nothing by it, he just doesn’t want to be kicked out of the group.

Rhea tells Priest that’s enough, and Priest says fine. JD is obviously still in the group. For now. Rhea says let’s get serious. They need to make an example out of those who think they can step to Judgment Day. Rhea talked with Pearce, and if Ivy wants her match, she’ll get it. It’ll be for the Women’s World Championship even, at Day One! Rhea will deal with Ivy, so tonight, it’s about the boys. Finn says no worries, he and Damian will deal with the Creed Brothers, and show them why the Judgment Day are the Undisputed Tag Team Champions! Priest & Finn head out, but Rhea makes JD stay back here. Ow, he still has splinters in his back, y’know…

 

Undisputed WWE Tag Team Championships: Finn Balor & Damian Priest w/ Rhea Ripley VS The Creed Brothers!

The Prince & Punisher have the gold, but Julius & Brutus have been like diamonds ever since coming to the WWE! Will the Creed Brothers become not just undisputed but Triple Crown Tag Team Champions for the holidays? Or will the only ones celebrating be the Judgment Day?

The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and we see who has the best Christmas gifts of all!

The teams sort out and Julius starts with Finn. They tie up, go around, and Julius waistlocks to SLAM Finn! Finn gets up fast, and he resets with Julius. Julius waistlocks again, for another SLAM! Finn moves, Julius facelocks and they gator roll into ropes. The ref counts, Julius lets off and Finn is frustrated already. Finn and Priest talk then Finn goes back to Julius. Finn kicks and rocks Julius, whips, but fans chant “Let’s Go, Mami!” Rhea says kiss her butt, but Finn whips. Julius reverses to hip toss Finn down! The fans fire up, Priest runs in but into an arm-drag! And a DROPKICK for Finn! Brutus clotheslines Priest out!

Rhea is furious while Finn and Priest regroup. The Creeds dare them to come back, but Raw goes to break.

Raw returns, and Rhea complains as Julius RAMS Finn in the corner! Julius digs his shoulder in, but lets off at 4. Fireman’s carry takeover, then tag to Brutus. Feed to Brutus’ fireman’s carry takeover, and Rhea is even more frustrated. Brutus whips Finn back into the corner, then the Creeds DOUBLE fireman’s carry takeover! Finn kicks Brutus, fires body shots and CHOPS! Finn whips, Brutus reverses and Finn hits buckles hard! Brutus storms up to KNEE Finn low, then tags Julius. The Creeds KNEE Finn back and forth between them! Then they DOUBLE GUTBUSTER! Rhea is furious but Julius stares Priest down.

Julius drags Finn up, Finn powers out and Priest tags in. Julius ducks the lariat but Priest dumps him out! Then Priest LARIATS Julius down! Fans boo but Rhea taunts Julius. Priest whips Julius into the steel steps! Even Rhea is impressed. Priest gets Julius up and ROCKS him! Priest puts Julius in, storms up on him, and brings him over. Tag to Finn, they mug Julius, and Finn ROCKS Julius. Finn bumps Julius off buckles, RAMS into him again and again, then CHOPS! Finn whips corner to corner, runs in but Julius BOOTS him down! Julius crawls, but Finn anchors a foot! Julius hops, BOOTS Finn away, hot tag to Brutus!

Brutus rallies on Finn< CLUBS Priest, then CLOBBERS Finn! Brutus trips Finn, BRUTUS SMASH! The fans fire up, Brutus hauls Finn up, GUTWRENCH SUPLEX! Finn goes to a corner, Brutus bear crawls then runs in to SPLASH! And then torture rack! RACK SLAM! Cover, TWO! Brutus snarls, Rhea tells Finn to get up, but Finn goes to ropes. Brutus deadlifts Finn but Priest tags in! Priest KICKS Brutus and Finn TOSSES Brutus out! Priest then runs in around the way to POUNCE Brutus up and over the desk! Fans boo but Priest is all fired up as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns once again and Priest throws forearms with Brutus. The fans cheer Brutus and boo Priest as they go back and forth. Priest gets the edge, which Rhea likes! Priest CLUBS Brutus down, fans boo, but Priest lines up a shot. Brutus turns heel kick into a lift! Priest fights with forearms but Brutus just powers up again! BIG back suplex! Both men are down but crawling for their corners! Hot tags to Finn and Julius! Julius rallies on Finn with big forearms! And an OVERHEAD BELLY2BELLY! Kip up, and OVERHEAD BELLY2BELLY for Priest! Another kip up, and another OVERHEAD BELLY2BELLY for Finn!

Julius brings the straps down, and fans fire up for the STANDING SHOOTING STAR! Cover, TWO! Finn is still in this but Ivy feels how close Julius was! Julius hoists Finn up with an Electric Chair Lift, and Brutus climbs a corner! Priest rushes over to SHOVE Brutus down! Finn sunset flips Julius, TWO! Julius gets up, ducks Finn and DECKS Priest! But then DOUBLE LARIATS take Finn and Julius down! So Rhea CLUBS Ivy! Rhea Electric Chair Lifts Ivy, but Ivy slips free to turn that around on Rhea! Rhea panics as Ivy gives her the ELECTRIC CHAIR SLAM!! And then Julius CLUBS Finn! Electric Chair, tag to Brutus!

Brutus goes up, and BRUTUS BALL comes down!! Cover, PRIEST BREAKS IT! Julius tags in, but Priest choke grips! Julius fights, Priest powers him up, but Julius flips free of South of Heaven! And SHOTGUNS Priest out! Julius kips up, goes up and up, then SUPER CANNONBALLS Priest!! Finn has Brutus, though, and hits a SLINGBLADE! And then a SHOTGUN into buckles! Brutus flops into the drop zone, Finn hurries up top! But Julius springs right up! Priest tags in first and he gets Julius in his own Electric Chair! Finn adjusts, but Brutus trips him! Julius slips down, turns things back around, BRUTUS BALL for Priest!!! Cover, but Finn COUP DE GRACES it apart!!!

The fans are thunderous as all four men are down! Finn goes to ropes, Brutus runs in and CLOBBERS him out of the ring! Julius stands, Priest choke grips! SOUTH OF HEAVEN!!! But he can’t make the cover! Priest crawls, JUDGMENT DAY WINS!

Winners: Finn Balor & Damian Priest, by pinfall (still Undisputed WWE Tag Team Champions)

Julius kids out at 3.001, but it wasn’t fast enough! The Prince & Punisher put the Creeds down just long enough to survive with the gold, but how much longer can they keep this up? Will it only be a matter of time before someone ends their reign of terror?


My Thoughts:

An awesome Raw, and it was basically a go-home to the holidays, but also the Day One Raw combo show. Guess not even HHH wants that overly specific branding to go to waste. But we’re getting a borderline PPV/PLE level show with it all the same. Great promo from Becky and Nia to set their match up, but also plugging that Nia is in the Rumble. Great promo from Rollins and McIntyre to hype up their title match, and putting Rollins even more on the defense as he now might have a (kayfabe) bad arm to go with his (mostly kayfabe?) bad back. But given both Heels stood tall, I would think Mr. & Mrs. Monday Night Rollins win out.

Great story time promo from Nakamura that then turned into a brawl with Cody. Was kinda hoping Nakamura would top it off with “C’MON~!” but no, that is more a Face Nakamura thing. But I hope that they up the ante in the Cody VS Nakamura 1v1 rematch that of course Cody wins cleanly to have momentum going into the Royal Rumble. Great stuff with Kofi Klaus all night, especially with how comically shiny his butt was so you could see it when he twerks. Great use of Kofi Klaus to segue into other stories, too, such as with Imperium. Imperium beating Kofi up and then Jey makes the save to get a great win off Ludwig was good, maybe Jey finds his way to the Intercontinental Championship.

Speaking of which, what an awesome, almost PPV worthy title match between Gunther and Miz. Miz’s matches with Gunther have seriously made me go, “Why didn’t Miz do stuff like this before?” Miz’s new levels of athletic moves, technical moves and overall scrappy nature have been great, but it also does serve to make Gunther feel that much more powerful. And Bronson Reed wanting in on this future Intercontinental Championship #1 contender thing is also great, we need to see Gunther VS Bronson at some point, so why not with the next challenge? But now that Miz is done with the midcard title, not sure what he’ll do. He’s on good terms with DIY, but if DIY is to add a third man, it should be Lumis, not Miz.

Great Women’s Tag title match and I am genuinely yet pleasantly surprised Kayden & Katana won. I thought Fyre & Dawn were going to get the titles off Chelsea & Piper, but as Fyre & Dawn make better Heels than Faces because they are spooky scary, it makes sense we get Face tag champs now. This is great for Kayden & Katana, and hopefully they’ll be facing teams from all brands, not just here on Raw. Nox & Natty already had a shot, I feel like Shayna & Zoey are gonna win and be Raw’s next contenders. Fyre & Dawn or Kabuki Warriors will be from SmackDown, not sure if HHHBK want Meta Four’s Lash & Jakara to try while still on NXT.

And of course, awesome stuff from Judgment Day all night. That opening promo segment to lead into the Street Fight was hilarious stuff, because Truth is nothing less. Great Street Fight with Truth getting that win, and great bit of Judgment Day teasing JD about that Loser Leaves stipulation. Great tie in with Diamond Mine and Alpha Academy having their promo. Really good match from Tozawa and Ivar but of course Ivar wins out. And awesome main event for the tag titles. Ivy got to throw Rhea down, and the Creeds almost get Judgment Day. That 3.001 kickout was a great touch, because it shows how closer the Creeds are, but they’re just not there yet. Who knows who gets these belts off Judgment Day, but these matches are only gonna get better from here.

My Score: 8.9/10


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Mitchell’s ROH Death Before Dishonor Results & Report! (7/26/24)

YEEHAW!

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The word of the day is, “Gold!”

ROH brings Death Before Dishonor to Texas, and makes it bigger than ever! SIX championship matches, how drastically will the landscape change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – MXM Collection VS Spanish Announce Project; wins.
  • Komander VS The Beast Mortos; wins.
  • Texas Deathmatch: Leyla Hirsch VS Diamante; wins.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championship Qualifier: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS The Dark Order; wins and advances to Battle of the Belts 11.
  • ROH World Tag Team Championships: The Kingdom VS Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O’Reilly; win(s) and
  • ROH World Television Championship Survival of the Fittest: Atlantis Jr. VS Lio Rush VS Shane Taylor VS Johnny TV VS Lee Johnson VS Brian Cage; wins and
  • ROH Pure Championship: Wheeler Yuta VS Lee Moriarty; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship: Billie Starkz VS Red Velvet; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Championship: Athena VS Queen Aminata; wins and
  • ROH World Championship: Mark Briscoe VS Roderick Strong; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 7.25.2024

Slammiversary Fallout! Where do things go on the way to Victory Road?

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Well now we start the fall out of Slammiversary. Josh Alexander in his bad bitch summer, X-Speedball legacy, ABC got the t-a-g and Jordynne is still in charge of the Knockouts division. Like I said at the end of Slammiversary, all of the champions being Babyfaces is stupid. They need to drop a couple titles fairly quickly, because I don’t care what some people say, Nic Nemeth ain’t gonna bring any eyes to the brand. He’s about as hot as day old Hamburger Helper over a camping sterno.

We’ll probably open with the luke warm champion, so tune in like 10 minutes late for anything of substance to be happen.

https://x.com/i/status/1816629254349533588

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner: Maclin wins via KIA – *
  • AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan: AJ wins via Down Payment – **
  • Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young): Hammer Your ASH wins via Torture Rack – ** 1/2
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey): Broken Alphabet wins via Twist & Splash – ***

 

Results:

Nemeth gives the ole “I’ll be a fighting champion…blah blah” promo and drops the “any company” line that we’ve already understood what that means. Campaign Singh cuts him off…and I never thought I’d be happy for Campaign Singh to walk out and say anything…ever. And…Mustafa’s promo is worse than Dolph’s. He’s gone from parody to caricature even saying “it was the biggest screw job Montreal ever saw”. Like some of these lines are cheap heat, but most are just brain dead comments that wouldn’t get a reaction out of anyone (and the crowd was silent for that comment). Mustafa gets caught in an Archer “phrasing” moment about getting screwed hard, but this is painful. Promos written by 14 year olds everyone…

This ends with Ali challenging Nemeth for the World Title. While I’m not against walk up challenges, I watch Japanese wrestling, I don’t really get the point aside from doing it just to do it. 

ABC and Matt Hardy have a small promo, and I’m still not really a fan of Unbroken Matt Version 6.0. The floating between Broken voice and his normal voice sounds amateurish.

OH LOOK, finally a match 20 minutes into the show. And it’s my son Steve Maclin! OH CHRIST he’s facing Deaner. This has been 25 minutes of talking followed by the worst god damn attempt at a gimmick. Deaner’s little “Papa Santino told me I can wipe my ass only if the crowd agrees”. This gimmick should die in a fire.

Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner

Deaner started off quick because Maclin was in disbelief that Deaner was actually gonna fight him. Maclin dodges a Crossbody, Busaiku Knee, and just starts beating on Deaner for fun. And this is fun, maybe Maclin can make sure Deaner gets stretchered out and written off forever. How do you call for an ambulance in French? Maclin with the old Back Breaker into a stretch. Deaner tries to nerd rage up, breaks the Back Breaker Stretch, his punch combo, into a Manhattan Drop and Bulldog. Deaner hits the Crossbody, but Maclin kicks out. This is entirely too competitive.

Deaner goes for the Deaner DDT, blocked, Olympic Slam into Splashing Deaner into the corner, Caught in the Crosshairs, K-I-A, thanks for coming you damn dweeb. Stay in Canada and don’t travel Deaner, please.

https://x.com/i/status/1816633784537874761

AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan

As the bell sounds, Sami knocks Rich off the apron, Low Bridges AJ, does the Beats of the Bodhran on AJ and then AJ eats the offense and strategizes with his crew. Bishop and Rich swarm the ring, Sami allows himself to get distracted so AJ slides in and starts beating on Sami. AJ throats Sami across the middle rope and Rich makes his presence felt, AJ distracts the referee and Rich gets in a lot of cheap shots. Bishop throws Sami back in the ring, and AJ keeps up the pressure. Lots of 5 count chokes and leverage moves. After the commercial break ends, Sami dodges a Tennessee Whiskey Knee, gets in a few shots before Rich trips Sami as he’s setting up a Dive, and then AJ takes advantage of the position and hits the goofball knee strike.

AJ calls for his Chokeslam, Sami tries to break it with Axe Handles, then claws the eyes. Sami goes for a Scoop Slam, gets him part way up and then falls over. AJ Chokeslam again, but he bites his hand and starts fighting back. Launches himself at AJ, sends him bouncing off the ropes and uses the momentum to hit that Scoop Slam that was teased earlier. Sami goes for a Western Lariat but eats a Big Boot. AJ does a little Hulk Hogan pose to signal a Leg Drop, but Sami dodges and then connects on a Sliding Lariat. Thumbs Up, Thumbs….interference. Rich distracts the ref, Bishop lays out Sami, AJ connects with the Down Payment.

Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young)

ASH and Jordynne exchange slaps and then Jordynne starts to out muscle ASH. Spinebuster from Jordynne, Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights off, rope run, Sattelite DDT into both tagging out. EY does the Flair corner flop, slides back in between Hammer’s legs, and connects on a Neckbreaker. EY is the quicker of the two, but Hammer finally gets his hands on him and a Release Belly to Belly into a full mount raining of fists, then a near fall. Hammer smashes EY in a corner, Arm Wringer into an Irish Whip across, but EY moves and Hammer tags out to ASH. ASH levels Jordynne, peppers EY with a few shots and pulls him back to their corner and starts some tandem offense with Hammerman. Hammer Guerilla Presses ASH and throws her into EY for a near fall. Hammer looks to aim for either a Powerbomb or Nightmare Pendulum, but EY drops it into a Small Package, pinfall kick out, they both run, Double Lariat spot. The Knockouts get tagged in.

Jordynne is in control early, World’s Strongest Slam into a Vader Bomb. Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights it off and tags out to Hammer. Jordynne and EY do some schoolyard stuff with the old Push while Jordynne is down to trip Hammer. All four get in, ASH gets leveled, EY gets leveled, Hammer and Jordynne have a brief face off, but Hammer throws Jordynne to the apron and ASH connects with a Meteora from the apron. Death Valley Driver from Young on Hammer, ASH stares in shock, EY tells her to get, ASH runs away. EY goes up for his Macho Elbow, and ASH causes him to fall to Hammer’s feet, Torture Rack, and EY submits.

Josh Alexander comes out, with new heel music. And it’s not that bad, definitely better than some other people’s new music. Josh yells at the crowd a bit, says he can’t wait til he’s back in a real Canadian town, like his home of Toronto. Then he drops the mic in lieu of an explanation. The crowd chants him off with the “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey”. 

https://x.com/i/status/1816647373654724937

The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey)

JDC and Hardy start, but JDC quickly tags out to Myers and that doesn’t go well. Hardy grabs a hold of Myers, a few Delete chops, drags him to his corner and they all get in a few shots punctuated with Hardy getting tagged back in and an Elbow into Myers’ extended and worked on left arm. Myers stays isolated, back into the corner, Boot to the gut, Ace tags in and wallops Myers. Ace connects on Double Kicks, into Russian Leg Sweep and his half of Click Click Boom, for a 2 count. Myers finally gets free with a Jaw Breaker and tags out to Eddie. But The System gets no momentum, Ace stifles Eddie’s offense and starts a few quick tags with him and Bey for tandem offense. Moose finally comes down the ramp as Eddie kicked out of yet another pinfall attempt because The System has had nothing going for them. Eddie finally gets some offense since Moose was a big enough distraction.

Eddie thinks they have a spot, so he tags back in JDC, but The ABC stop him cold, tag in Matt Hardy, and Matt walks down JDC, but JDC Low Bridges. Matt is on the outside, so all of The System surrounds Hardy, then Joe Hendry’s music hits! That stops the heel beatdown, and we follow Hendry’s entire entrance. So that proves Hendry is bigger than the 8 other people in this frame. Not really sure if that’s optics you want to push along. Ace and JDC try to remind people there’s wrestling going on, but JDC thumbs the eye to get a little something going. Vertical Suplex for a near fall, tag out for Eddie and Eddie lights up Ace with some of those NOAH Chops. Ace retreats to the ropes and Alisha chokes him with the ropes while the ref is distracted.

Myers gets tagged in, Ace tries to use the crowd energy, Myers stops it at first but then Ace slips a Scoop Slam and tags out to Bey. Hot tag, strike rush, Double Stomp, educated feet, Leap Frog to the corner but Lish climbs on the apron and yells at Bey which stops his rhythm. Myers kicks his feet out and causes Bey to crash. Eddie tags in for a few shots, then to JDC and Slingshot Knees, Wringer Snapmare, Bow and Arrow Submission, and JDC is just doing solid wrestling work right now. Uppercut between the Shoulder Blades as Bey tries to get out, tag to Myers and Bey is still eating offense. Eddie tags in, Bey tries the Sunset Flip, but Eddie tags out before going over, so Myers folds up Bey for a near fall and then tags out to JDC who connects on a Standing Suplex, slams Bey’s face into the corner, Eddie tags in, and Bey finally fights up to his feet, Eddie just flatten Bey’s comeback, tries a Tiger Driver but eats an Enzuigiri for a simultaneous tag. JDC and Hardy come in, JDC tries to exit halfway in, but Hardy is wrecking shop. He disposes of Eddie, Myers slides in but eats a tandem Neckbreaker/DDT from Hardy. Face team does the Delete Corner Face Smashes. Poetry in Motion into a Side Effect into Corkscrew Swanton for only 2 since Myers breaks it up! Everyone throwing hands, referee is distracted, Moose comes in to Spear Hardy, but Hardy dodges and throws him into JDC (I get the call back), Hendry then lays out Moose with the big Lariat. Twist of Fate from Hardy, Splash from Bey, Broken Alphabet wins!

 

Overall Score: 4/10

Ugh, cliche promos, too damn much talking, a competitive squash match with an imbecile as our first “match”, into an overbooked and slow heel match, finally a decent tag match (with the right team going over), into another overbooked match with a “tease” for the mystery backup being more obvious than Jericho’s WWF debut.

Aside from the afore mentioned tag match, The Rascalz promo and The System Promo; this was hard to watch. A lot of cornball promos, Rosemary licks her conspiracy board, storylines got zero traction. Whoopity Doo, Ryan Nemeth got a match next week and we get an undead wedding.

While this was a bad episode, it was bad by at least new standards. We’re not back in the TNA Dark Days again, but this was…a useless show.


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