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Mitchell’s NJPW Wrestling Satsuma no Kuni Results & Report! (4/28/21)

Things are heating up!

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NJPW Wrestling Satsuma no Kuni

NJPW’s gold shall be refined with fire!

Roppongi 3K is back on top of NJPW’s Junior Heavyweight Tag Team Division, but will Desperado & Kanemaru drag them right back down?

NOTE: NJPW no longer wants to feed AXS TV now that it is with Anthem and Impact Wrestling. But never fear, I will cover NJPW in the spirit of AXS in providing the most important matches of the show.

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • 8 Man Tag: Los Ingobernables de Japon VS The United Empire; The United Empire wins.
  • KOPW 2021 YTR Style Blindfold Match: Toru Yano VS EVIL w/ Dick Togo; Yano wins and retains the KOPW trophy.
  • IWGP Junior Heavyweight Tag Team Championships: Roppongi 3K VS El Desperado & Yoshinobu Kanemaru; RPG3K wins and retains the titles.

PLAY BY PLAY

8 Man Tag: Los Ingobernables de Japon VS The United Empire!

Bushi, Sanada, Shingo Takagi and Tetsuya Naito have been taking the fight to Jeff Cobb, Aaron Henare, Great-O-Khan and the new IWGP World Heavyweight Champion, Will Ospreay, all up and down the Road to Wrestling Dontaku! But will Wrestling Satsuma be where the ungovernable become the conquered?

The teams sort out and after an LIJ fist bump, the Empire attacks! They all spill outside, and Takagi brawls with Ospreay! The bell rings to get this on the record as Ospreay claws Takagi’s face and chokes him against railing! Ospreay BITES Takagi’s ear!! Does he think he’s Tyson? Khan and Naito brawl on the ramp, Henare is after Sanada and Cobb has Bushi. Khan blocks a kick and carries Naito to RAM him into the ring apron! Ospreay wraps Takagi’s arm around a post and pulls him into it! Takagi fights free to whip, but Ospreay reverses and Takagi hits railing! The ref tries to restore order, and Khan puts Naito in. Finally, we have two wrestlers in the ring, and Khan scoop SLAMS Naito down! Cover, TWO!

Fans cheer and rally up for LIJ but Khan taunts Naito with his ponytail. Khan unleashes Mongolian Chop after Mongolian Chop, but Naito blocks! Naito swings a chop but Khan blocks it! Khan throat chops, then hits a crane stance, just to DECK Naito with a haymaker! Khan covers, TWO! Only Ospreay and the Empire cheer for Khan as Khan tags Cobb. Cobb gets Naito up for a headbutt. Henare joins in, they double headbutt! Henare & Cobb double whip, then double shoulder Naito down, for a KICK and GACHIMUCHI MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Cobb is surprised but he drags Naito over. Cobb sets Naito up on the ropes, Ospreay hits a DRAPING DOUBLE STOMP!

Ospreay BLASTS the LIJ corner then claps it up for himself. Cobb stomps Naito, then drags him over to tag in Khan. The Empire mugs Naito but fans rally for “L I J! L I J!” Khan drags Naito up but Naito throws a haymaker! Then another! Khan eggs Naito on, and then grabs the ear to CLUB it! Khan runs, but Naito elbows him down! Naito adds the basement dropkick and both men are down! Fans fire up as Naito crawls, but Khan drags him from the corner. Naito gets up but Khan ducks the enziguri to kick and club and CHOP! Khan whips, Naito hits a flying shoulder tackle! Both men are down again and fans fire back up. Naito and Khan crawl, hot tags to Ospreay and Takagi!

Takagi runs Ospreay over with a shoulder, then scoop SLAMS him! Takagi whips, Ospreay reverses but Takagi waistlocks. Ospreay switches, Henare comes in but Takagi fights free. Takagi sends Henare into Ospreay, then DOUBLE LARIATS! Cobb gets in, Takagi tries to scoop but can’t, and Cobb clubs him. Cobb whips Takagi to a corner, runs in, but misses the back elbow. Takagi kicks and reels Cobb in, but Cobb suplexes! Takagi fights that off to suplex Cobb in return! Takagi fires up with “OI! OI! OI!” and fans join in. Takagi kicks Ospreay, throws elbows into his shoulder, then runs for a sliding lariat, only for Ospreay to dodge.

Ospreay and Takagi trade dodging and blocking kicks, Ospreay fights off the Gory Especial, but Takagi suplexes, into STUN-DOG MILLIONAIRE! Ospreay goes up, spins, but no rana! Takagi swings Ospreay into Bushi’s basement dropkick! Bushi DECKS Khan, Takagi tags Sanada. The Calm ‘n’ Fury whip but Ospreay kicks back! Sanada blocks the next kick and ducks the enziguri, only for it to hit Takagi! Ospreay slides under Sanada, dodges his clothesline, and tags Henare! Sanada fireman’s carries but Henare slips off. Henare shoves Sanada to a corner and runs in but into an elbow. Sanada Quebrada but Henare gets under.

Sanada blocks the boot, trips Henare up, and puts the Ultimate Weapon in Paradise! Henare can’t get free and Sanada gets the fans to cheer louder and louder. Sanada then dropkicks Henare out of Paradise, and out of the ring! Henare staggers up, into Sanada’s PLANCHA! Sanada tells Khan to back off, and he puts Henare in. Sanada aims from the apron, springboards, but Henare gets under. Henare comes back to SHINING WIZARD in the corner! Henare whips, Sanada gets past him but leaps into Henare’s arms! Henare pops Sanada up to a suplex! Henare BLASTS the LIJ corner, then takes aim from the neutral one. Sanada stands, and BOOTS the Spear away!

Sanada fireman’s carries and throws to the dragon sleeper, but Henare slips through to spin Sanada. Sanada escapes the fisherman to waistlock and GERMAN SUPLEX! Both men are down, Sanada gets Henare up for forearms. Henare reverses the whip, and scoops for a BERZERKER BOMB! Tag to Cobb and Cobb gets Sanada up. Cobb and Henare double whip Sanada, then Cobb runs in, only to miss! Sanada dropkicks Henare’s legs out, but Cobb blocks Sanada’s rana! Cobb gets Sanada up, but Sanada ranas through after all! Hot tag to Bushi! Death Mask stomps Cobb, catches him and spins him to a DDT! Cover, TWO!

Bushi kicks and whips but Cobb reverses, only to run into a swing kick! Bushi springboards to missile dropkick! Bushirooni! Fans fire up and Bushi reels Cobb in, but no fisherman screw! Cobb RAMS Bushi into a corner, Ospreay BLASTS LIJ’s corner, Khan corner clotheslines Bushi! Khan feeds Bushi to a ROUNDHOUSE SANDWICH from Henare & Ospreay, then feeds Bushi to Cobb’s ATHLETIC PLEX! Cover, but Takagi breaks it! Ospreay throws Takagi out, Khan and Henare hurry after Naito and Bushi. Cobb drags Bushi up, whips but Bushi holds ropes. Naito gets in to elbow and ENZIGURI Cobb! Khan gets the CLAW on Naito, and then drops an elbow!

Sanada dropkicks Khan, Henare BOOTS Sanada, and Takagi CLOBBERS Henare! Takagi dodges Ospreay’s springboard to elbow, JAB and YUK- No! Ospreay dodges to handspring, into a GERMAN, but Ospreay lands on his feet! Ospreay ENZIGURIS, but Takagi rebounds! Takagi lariats but Ospreay slips through it! Ospreay gets Takagi up but Takagi RANAS?! Takagi LARIATS Ospreay out of the ring! Fans are thunderous for LIJ as they watch Cobb get up. Takagi feeds Cobb to Bushi’s ENZIGURI, and then they double whip. Cobb blocks the double hip toss to ram them into each other. Cobb DECKS Takagi, Bushi rolls Cobb, TWO!!

Bushi misses the enziguri but comes back with the heel kick! Cobb wobbles, Bushi runs back in, but no Code Breaker! Cobb pops Bushi up but Bushi makes that a rana! Cover, TWO!! Cobb escapes and CLOBBERS Bushi! Cobb drags Bushi back up, whips and reels him in, for a TOUR OF THE ISLANDS!! Cover and the others keep LIJ out, the Empire wins!

Winners: The United Empire, by pinfall

Los Ingobernables de Japon have lost! But the war for NJPW has only just begun. Ospreay holds his IWGP World Heavyweight Championship in Takagi’s face. Is Ospreay planning on defeating Takagi again to prove his dominance? Or will the Dragon be the one slaying him this time?

 

KOPW 2021 YTR Style Blindfold Match: Toru Yano VS EVIL w/ Dick Togo!

The Producer and definitive Mr. KOPW 2020 is still working on keeping the 2021 trophy, but the King of Darkness wants it for his own! Will Yano see it coming when Everything is Evil? Or will Darkness Fall, and take a loss?

Now, what makes this “YTR Style?” Well, instead of starting with blindfolds, the goal is to put one on your opponent before getting a pinfall or submission! Without a blindfold, falls won’t count! That said, the introductions are made, the KOPW trophy is presented, and we’ll see who can win by blinding the other!

Yano’s introduction is the longer, yet he is impatient with Evil and Dick Togo. Bullet Club Low Sweets, and both men go for blindfolds! They rush each other, Evil kicks low and whips Yano to a corner. Yano reverses, tucks his blindfold, and unties the red buckle pad! One down, three to go, and he tosses it to Evil! The ref still won’t allow buckle pads to be weapons so he fights with Evil about it. Yano gets the blindfold on Evil and rolls him up! TWO!!! Evil narrowly escapes, Yano argues the count, but Evil puts the blindfold on Yano! Evil spins Yano around, but Yano escapes the STO! But now Yano has no idea where anything is!

Evil kicks, clubs and whips Yano, but Yano stops himself because he’s scared to run into anything! The ref and Evil argue, and Dick SMACKS Yano with the buckle pad! Yano gets free of the blindfold but Evil goes out after him. Evil starts looking under the ring, and he finds chairs! Dick distracts the ref and Evil JAMS Yano! Evil puts a chair around Yano’s head, and hits the HOME RUN! Yano is down but Evil gets him up. The ref is still busy with Dick, and Evil gets tape! Evil tapes Yano to the railing, and then puts a blindfold on him! Yano is already trapped, the blindfold is just to mess with him! The ring count begins, Yano tries to get free, but both hands are stuck!

The count is past 10 of 20, and then 15! Yano is hulking up and he manages to throw the blindfold off! The ref realizes what really happened and goes out, but Evil gets past him. Evil pushes the ref aside, and stomps away on Yano! Evil even chokes Yano while Dick stays in the ref’s way! The ref gets past Dick, gets Evil to back off, and with help from Young Lions, Yano is freed. Evil and Dick are already plotting something more, and Evil drags Yano up. Fans rally for “Y T R! Y T R!” but Evil kicks Yano low. Evil brings Yano around, and blindfolds Abe!? Now Abe really can’t see it coming as Evil RAMS Yano into the timekeeper’s area! The table completely topples over!!

Evil claps and fans rally while the Young Lions help Abe. Evil drags Yano up, puts him in the ring, and drags Yano up. Evil whips Yano, into the bare red corner! Yano’s tactics have backfired again! Evil puts a blindfold on Yano before he covers, TWO!! Yano is still in this but Evil stomps away on him! Evil stands on Yano for a cocky cover, but the ref says that’s on Yano’s neck. Evil steps away to drag Yano back up. Evil reels Yano into the cobra twist, and gets help from Dick! Dick lets go before the ref sees, but then helps out again. The ref sees this time and counts, but Dick lets go at 4. Evil lets Yano go, covers, TWO! Yano gets the blindfold off again, Evil paces as fans rally up.

Evil drags Yano up but Yano fights back with body shots! Evil rakes Yano’s eyes! Evil kicks Yano out of the ring, then distracts the ref so that Dick can blindfold Yano and stomp away on him! Dick stops before he gets caught, so Evil goes out and stomps Yano himself! Evil pushes Yano under the ring! Evil and Dick Too Sweet while the ring count begins. Yano has all but disappeared and the count reaches 10 of 20! Fans rally as the count continues, but where is Yano? We’re at 15 of 20 again, Yano appears out the one side and gets in at 18! Evil stomps Yano for somehow saving himself, and then drags him up. Evil runs, but Yano dodges!? How?!

Wait, how did no one notice those GIANT eye holes he cut in the bag?! It’s less a blindfold and more a mask now! Yano rakes Evil’s eyes and whips him into the bare corner! Yano takes off the “mask” and Dick protests but Yano gets Evil up. Yano dodges Evil’s punch, shoves him into Dick, and then Belly2Belly suplexes! Everyone is down but fans rally up! Yano gets a spare blindfold, and goes after Evil! Evil fights that off, whips Yano but Yano stops from hitting bare buckles. Evil runs in but Yano sends him into buckles! Yano wants to low blow but the ref won’t let him! Yano puts the blindfold on the ref?! Evil shoves Yano into the ref, then blocks Yano’s low blow!

Dick returns and tries to get a blindfold on him, but Yano fights it off! Yano puts the blindfold on Dick and shoves him down, but Evil LOW BLOWS Yano! Evil gets another blindfold, puts that on Yano, but Yano MULE KICK LOW BLOWS! Yano puts a blindfold on Evil and now everyone is wearing one! Fans cheer and rally as Dick bails out of the ring and Yano starts to stir. The ref comes to and gets his blindfold off. Wait, where is Dick going? Dick goes up the ramp and backstage as Evil and Yano are facing a standing count. The fans rally for “Y T R!” as we reach 9, but both men take the blindfolds off and sit up! The ref lets them get to their feet, Evil kicks and runs, but into an atomic drop!

Yano trips Evil to catapult him into bare buckles! Yano gets a blindfold, puts it on Evil, but the lights go out! DICK!! That’s what he’s up to! Evil gets his Darkness Match after all! And when the lights come back up, Evil has Yano in a blindfold, and is using Dick’s Spoiler Choker!! Yano is all but out, Dick returns, and Evil drags Yano back up. Evil runs, and LARIATS Yano down!! Cover, TWO!?! Yano survives and Evil is shocked! Evil gets Yano’s legs and steps through for the SCORPION DEATHLOCK! Yano endures, and doesn’t even realize he’s so close to the ropes because of the blindfold! Fans rally for him and Yano reaches out, but Evil drags him away! Yano endures, but Evil sits deep!

Yano gets the blindfold off, and that’s the same as a ropebreak under YTR Rules! Evil lets go but the damage has been done. Evil says he’ll finish this now, and he puts the blindfold back on. Evil gets Yano up, spins him around, EVERYTHING- NO! Yano slips out, but Evil sends the ref into him! Yano rakes the ref’s eyes, thinking it was Evil! Evil kicks low, Dick gets in, and they double whip Yano at the blue corner! Dick runs in to back elbow, then Evil runs in to clothesline! Evil and Dick vow to end this, but Yano fights Magic Killer off! Yano sends Evil into Dick, then gives them DOUBLE LOW BLOWS!

Yano puts the blindfold back on Evil, pulls it tight, and feeds Dick to Evil! Dick gets EVERYTHING IS EVIL!! Evil takes off his blindfold and realizes what he did to Dick! Yano LOW BLOWS Evil again!! Blindfold on, Yano rolls Evil up, Yano wins!!

Winner: Toru Yano, by pinfall (still Provisional Mr. KOPW 2021)

Yano plays by his own rules and wins by them, too! Evil tried to pull one over on Yano, but Yano proved he is the ultimate trickster! Yano then gets a can of gold spray paint? Because he’s going to restore his KOPW trophy to the proper color! Will Yano and this trophy continue to shine all through 2021?

 

IWGP Junior Heavyweight Tag Team Championships: Roppongi 3K VS El Desperado & Yoshinobu Kanemaru!

Sho & Yoh have the titles back, but are hungry for more! Will RPG3K make a dent in Despy’s confidence? Or will the IWGP Junior Heavyweight Champion once again be a double champion?

The introductions are made, the tag titles are raised, and we see who really runs the Junior Heavyweight Division!

Yoh starts against the Heel Master, Kanemaru, and fans rally up as the two circle. Yoh and Kanemaru approach as the fans clap, “R P G! R P G!” Kanemaru and Yoh tie up, Yoh wrenches to a wristlock but Kanemaru rakes eyes! Kanemaru wrenches the arm, YANKS on it, then wristlocks. Yoh rolls, kips up, handsprings and wrenches but Kanemaru breaks free. Fans cheer that exchange as the two reset. Kanemaru and Yoh circle, but Desperado gets in to blindside Yoh! Kanemaru DECKS Sho, he and Despy mug Yoh, then double whip. Kanemaru runs in but Yoh dodges to dropkick Desperado down! Kanemaru CLUBS Yoh, runs but into a dropkick!

Fans fire up for Yoh as he stomps Kanemaru down. Yoh drags Kanemaru, CLUBS him, then DECKS him with a EuroUpper. Yoh gets Kanemaru up, Sho gets in and they double whip. Kanemaru stops himself to stomp Sho, but Yoh kicks and whips. Kanemaru reverses to dropkick Yoh’s leg out! Sho runs in but Kanemaru dumps him out, and Desperado goes after him with uppercuts! Kanemaru paces around Yoh as Desperado throws Sho into railing. Kanemaru stomps Yoh’s leg, drags him back up, and whips him to ropes to then dropkick the leg again! Yoh writhes, that’s his repaired leg, after all. Kanemaru tags Desperado, and they split the wishbone!

Desperado taunts Yoh, drops a knee on his leg, then taunts him more as he stomps the leg. Desperado JAMS the leg in the leg scissor, then talks more trash. Desperado gets Yoh up for a SHINBREAKER! Yoh falls over, Kanemaru tags in, and Desperado kicks Yoh to the apron. Kanemaru drags Yoh to a corner to SLAM the leg into the post! Desperado is after Sho again as Kanemaru BOOTS Yoh’s leg! And again! Red Shoes reprimands, Desperado joins in and he SLAMS Yoh’s leg into the post, too! Kanemaru and Desperado back off, Yoh flops to the floor, and Sho checks on him. Red Shoes has everyone go to their corners and a ring count starts.

Sho coaches Yoh up as the count climbs to 10 of 20. Fans rally up for “R P G!” again as Yoh gets to his feet at 15! Yoh hobbles up and in at 17! Kanemaru stomps Yoh, kicks him at the ropes, and eggs him on. Yoh throws hands, Kanemaru kicks the bad leg! Kanemaru drags Yoh over, tags Desperado, and Desperado splashes down on the leg! Cover, TWO! Desperado was a bit lax with the cover but he drags Yoh back up. Desperado gets the leg but Yoh sunset flips the shinbreaker! TWO, and Desperado stomps Yoh! Yoh blocks the clothesline, Desperado CHOPS, but Yoh PELES! Fans fire up as Yoh and Desperado are both down! Hot tag to Sho!

High Voltage rallies on Suzuki-Gun! Kanemaru reverses a whip but Sho stops himself, to then dump Kanemaru out. Sho sweeps the legs and dropkicks Kanemaru off the apron! Sho blocks Desperado’s kick, throws forearms, then runs to run Desperado over! Fans fire up with Sho as he aims from a corner. Desperado slowly gets up, Sho runs corner to corner and clotheslines! Sho whips, reels Desperado in and fires off KICK after KICK! Fans fire up with Sho again as he powers up, and KICKS Desperado down! Cover, TWO! Desperado grits his teeth but Sho is still after him. Sho waistlocks and dead lifts Desperado, but Desperado elbows free. Sho ROCKS Desperado, runs, but into a lift!

Sho fights off the spinebuster and fires off more forearms. Desperado reverses the whip and Kanemaru trips him up! Kanemaru drags Sho out to whip him hard into railing! Sho is stuck, Kanemaru runs to leap frog and leg drop Sho off the railing! Fans have to admit, that was good. Desperado CLOBBERS Yoh while Kanemaru casually returns to ringside. Kanemaru gets Sho back in, Desperado holds Sho down, and Kanemaru runs to RYDER KICK! Cover, TWO!! Sho survives the onslaught and Desperado is frustrated. Tag to Kanemaru, and he drags Sho around to hook him up for a Camel Clutch! Sho endures as Kanemaru bends him back!

Kanemaru changes up his grip but Sho fights to get his arms free. Sho reaches and gets a ropebreak with a foot! Kanemaru lets him go, but drags Sho up again. Kanemaru elbows Sho on the back, then feeds him to Desperado’s boots! Tag to Desperado, he stomps Sho around, then talks trash as he gets Sho up. Desperado scoops and SLAMS Sho down! Yoh is back up and he coaches Sho but Kanemaru tags in. Kanemaru gives toying kicks to Sho before he stomps him again. Kanemaru still toys with Sho, gets him up and slaps him around, but Sho throws forearms! Kanemaru rakes eyes and whips, but Sho reverses to kitchen sink knee!

Sho and Kanemaru crawl for their corners, hot tag to Desperado and he stomps Sho down! Desperado spits at Yoh, drags Sho up, and Suzuki-Gun double whips, only for Sho to DOUBLE SPEAR! Fans fire up as Sho and Suzuki-Gun are down! Hot tag to Yoh! Yoh rallies on Desperado with big forearms and elbows! Desperado reverses the whip but Yoh hits a FLYING FOREARM! Yoh kips up, that bad leg is doing just fine! Yoh wants Desperado to get up, and fans rally behind him. Desperado is in a corner, Yoh runs in and back body blocks! Yoh turns Desperado to hit a NECKBREAKER! Yoh goes to a corner, climbs up top, and leaps to missile dropkick! Cover, TWO!

Yoh makes sure his leg is alright as he gets up and goes back for Desperado. Yoh gets Desperado up and reels him in, but Desperado fights the suplex! Desperado wrenches the arm but Yoh ROCKS him with a forearm! Desperado ROCKS Yoh back! Yoh ROCKS Desperado! They keep trading forearm for forearm, Yoh gets the edge but Desperado comes back, with a kick to the leg! Desperado gets Yoh up but Yoh EuroUppers! Yoh makes sure his leg is ready, as he suplexes, but Desperado fights, shoves and SPINEBUSTERS! High stack cover, TWO!! Yoh survives and both men are down! Fans build to another rally, Desperado gets Yoh up and reels him in for underhooks.

Yoh powers up to back drop Desperado away! Yoh gets to his feet, but Desperado kicks the bad leg again. Desperado reels Yoh in, but Yoh suplexes for a FALCON ARROW! Yoh fires up, gets Desperado up for a pump handle, and BITTER END!! Cover, TWO!?! Desperado survives but Yoh fires up! Yoh gets Desperado up again, underhooks, but Desperado fights it off to wrench and SHINBREAKER! Desperado holds the leg out for Kanemaru to SHOTGUN! Desperado gets the leg again, for a STRETCH MUFFLER! Yoh reaches and flails but Desperado drags him from ropes! Desperado thrashes the leg, Kanemaru keeps Sho outside, but Yoh keeps reaching!

Desperado rolls Yoh away to get both arms! NUMERO DOS PLUS! But Sho gets in to break it up! Kanemaru clubs and throws Sho out, then keeps after him to whip into railing! Sho comes back to CLOBBER Kanemaru! Fans fire up as Desperado gets mad. Desperado gets up while Yoh is in a corner. Desperado vows to end this, and he drags Yoh up to reel in. GUITARRA DEL ANGEL! Cover, TWO!! Desperado is frustrated again but he gets Yoh up. Fans rally, Desperado underhooks, but Yoh fights off Pince Loco! Yoh avoids Loco Mono, waistlocks, Desperado switches, but Yoh Shiranuis into the ELBOW DROP DDT! Both men are down and fans fire up again!

Yoh and Desperado crawl, hot tags to Kanemaru and Sho! Kanemaru boots but Sho stays up to fire off forearms! Sho runs but into a calf kick! Kanemaru grits his teeth, gets Sho up and reels him in to scoop for the BRITISH FALL! Cover, TWO! Kanemaru drags Sho back up, reels him back in, but Sho fights the suplex! Sho powers up to suplex Kanemaru! Kanemaru grabs Red Shoes to stop the suplex! Kanemaru kicks, runs and tilt-o-whirls, but Sho throws that off to SPEAR Kanemaru down! Cover, TWO! But into the KIMURA! Yoh intercepts Desperado as Kanemaru endures the double wristlock! Kanemaru kicks and reaches but Sho cranks the hold more!

Desperado barrels into Yoh and breaks the hold! Desperado and Yoh bail out but Sho focuses on Kanemaru. Fans rally up with Sho and he gets Kanemaru up to knuckle lock and wrench, to an elbow breaker! Someone goes into railing as Sho runs, but Kanemaru dodges. Kanemaru tilt-o-whirls to DDT! Both men are down again and fans fire up! Sho and Kanemaru go to opposite neutral corners. Kanemaru runs corner to corner and BOOTS Sho! Kanemaru scoops and SLAMS Sho, then heads up top. MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Sho survives, Kanemaru is upset, but Red Shoes says the count is fair. Kanemaru goes back up a corner, dares Sho to get up, and then leaps, but Sho dodges!

Yoh dropkicks Kanemaru! Desperado SPEARS Yoh! Sho GERMAN SUPLEXES Desperado! Sho fires up and GERMAN SUPLEXES Kanemaru! Sho holds on to GERMAN SUPLEX again! And then the pop-up to the ARMBAR!! Kanemaru flails, Sho pulls back harder, and fans fire up! Kanemaru rolls but Sho pulls now that he has the mount! Kanemaru endures the Disarmer, and gets a ropebreak with a foot! Sho lets go but fans rally as he gets to his feet. Sho drags Kanemaru back up, reels him in, and gets him up. Kanemaru fights the bomb off and rakes Sho’s eyes! Yoh SUPERKICKS, Sho BACKSTABBERS, and Yoh SHOTGUNS! Fans fire up with RPG3K as they power up!

Sho waits for Kanemaru to rise, and they get him up, but no 3K! Kanemaru rakes eyes, runs, but into DOUBLE KNEES! Then 3K!! Cover, but Desperado breaks it! Desperado stomps Sho, rakes Yoh’s eyes, but Red Shoes won’t let him close that fist! Yoh still dodges Loco Mono, for DOUBLE SUPERKICKS to send him flying! Yoh builds speed and FLIES! Direct hit at the ramp! Sho fires up and he takes aim with his bow! Sho gets Kanemaru up, reels him in and traps the arms, for SHOCK- NO! Kanemaru reverses to a double wristlock victory roll! TWO!! Kanemaru trips Sho to jackknife bridge, TWO!! Sho escapes and LARIATS Kanemaru inside-out!

Fans are thunderous as Sho gets Kanemaru up again! CROSS-ARM DRIVER!! Cover, TWO!?!? Kanemaru survives and fans fire up again! Sho shouts to Yoh and RPG3K regroups. Sho gets Kanemaru up, brings him around, tucks him in, and Yoh climbs up! STRONG X!! Cover, RPG3K wins!!

Winners: Roppongi 3K, by pinfall (still IWGP Junior Heavyweight Tag Team Champions)

The shout-out to Roppongi Vice wins it for Sho & Yoh! They prove that they’re going to continue right where they left off when they had to give these belts up! But Desperado stares Yoh down, non-verbally telling him not to get ahead of himself before thinking he can be Mr. Junior Heavyweight. Sho gets the mic and says, “Good evening, Kagoshima!” Thanks to their power, RPG3K defended their belts against Kanemaru & Desperado, so he thanks the fans for that. The Junior Tag titles are with RPG3K right now, but they’re not done fighting! Isn’t that right, Yoh?

Sho hands the mic to Yoh, and Yoh says, “That was a tough one, but we pulled it off. Thanks for your support. But it isn’t done with this defense. Coming up is the big festival, Dontaku in Hakata. I want these good vibes to continue to flow.” Yoh then wants him AND Sho to “go at it for the singles belt.” Sho nods and likes that idea. Tonight, Yoh will let Sho close this out. He hands the mic back to Sho, and Sho says, “After today, Kagoshima has once again become a very special place for us. Thank you all so much!” Kagoshima, from here on out, RPG3K and NJPW will “increase the voltage!” Will these two pump it up to 11 and take over the entire Junior Heavyweight Division?


My Thoughts:

A very good event as part of a two night Wrestling Satsuma. Yes, I skipped the first few matches, and I feel like the only thing I missed was Taichi sending a message to Guerrillas of Destiny by bringing out a ladder for what I believe is going to be a ladder match for the iron fingers. The 8 Man Tag was very good, LIJ losing was actually quite the surprise to me, but I suppose the United Empire needed to win. It makes sense, with Ospreay VS Takagi one more time, now for THE IWGP World Heavyweight Championship, is awesome, and all the momentum going into it will make it even better. Takagi will lose, I’m sure, and Ospreay will use that momentum to go against Okada one more time in another epic showdown.

Yano VS Evil was hilarious! The KOPW series is great, all the best parts of goofy, comedic, overbooked pro-wrestling, and that is why Yano wins again and again. As far as comedy wrestling goes, that was no less than 5 stars. I don’t know who is next for Yano, but I am sure it will be another instant comedy classic. Who knows who will take that trophy off of Yano, but that match is going to be awesome. The Junior Tag title match was great stuff, too, a really strong and of course serious match, and it makes a lot of sense for RPG3K to retain. Assuming Yoh doesn’t win the singles title off Desperado, RPG3K can still go on quite a run with the tag titles, making up for lost time.

My Score: 8.9/10


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 2.29.2024

Not a lot of lead time til Sacrifice, so let’s find out if there’s just obvious rematches or any wrinkles to flesh out the PPV card!

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Coming out of No Surrender we get two tapings before Sacrifice! Curious how many rematches and build offs we’ll see since 2 weeks isn’t exactly a lot of time to propagate a fresh feud. The System is in the main event again, Mustafa Ali has his inauguration event, AJ Francis makes his in-ring debut and there’s some Hammerstone buzz that might pay off tonight.

So as I’ve already said once, we don’t have a ton of time til Sacrifice, so let’s get to it!

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin w/The Rascalz vs Speedball Mike Bailey w/Trent Seven: Maclin wins via KIA – ***
  • Laredo Kid vs Jake Something: Jake wins via Into the Void – **
  • AJ Francis & Deaner vs Joe Hendry & Rich Swann: Hendry wins via Standing Ovation – ** 3/4
  • Tasha Steelz vs Xia Brookside: DOUBLE COUNT OUT – **
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Moose & Brian Myers) w/Alisha Edwards vs ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey) & Eric Young: System with a Trios Tandem Backpack Stunner, Yakuza Kick + Machoman Elbow – ***

 

Results:

Steve Maclin w/The Rascalz vs Speedball Mike Bailey w/Trent Seven

Bailey comes down favoring the leg that Maclin clipped at No Surrender, so Bailey will most likely eat another loss here with injury excuse.

Maclin shoots for the injured leg but Bailey defends back into the corner and manages to hit his Kick Flurry before the leg flares up. Maclin then powders, Bailey follows and its just a Fighting Spirit spot on the outside that resolves in classic NJPW way where both hear the officials count at the same time, stare at each other and slide in simultaneously. Maclin Lariats Bailey back out after the count is broken, Maclin distracts the ref and The Rascalz go after Bailey and the bad leg.

Bailey is now getting dissected, there’s a small comedy spot where Bailey lifts his Left Leg to dodge the offense and adopts the Karate Kid Crane Kick pose, but Maclin front kicks the plant leg out to cause Speedball to land in a split, then Maclin keeps up offense. Tree of Woe, Caught in the Crosshair, but Bailey sits up! Maclin posts himself, eats some offense, powders out and Bailey with a gorgeous Corkscrew Moonsault. Bailey brings Maclin to the apron to try and bring him back, but they start fighting on the apron, Bailey kicks with the bad leg and sells for a second while Maclin Lariats him back into the ring. Speedball with a Sweep, tries the Backflip Knees but misses and crashes on the apron. Maclin hits his SCUD missile Dive, then throws Bailey back in, Jarhead Butt attempt missed, Mayhem for All gets hit by Maclin but only for 2.

Trent causes a small distraction so Bailey manages a Crane Kick, Superkick combo, aims for the Tornado Kick but gets intercepted. Buckle Bomb connects, Powerbomb two is countered by a Poison Rana, Bailey heads to the top for Ultima Weapon and misses hard. KIA ends the match in a win for Steve.

If the name sticks, I do like Maclin and the Rascalz being known as the HIGHerarchy. 

Laredo Kid vs Jake Something

Laredo tries a dumb tie up and gets chucked backwards. Then he tries for a few Low Kicks to compromise Jake’s base, but it takes a Headscissor to cause Jake to roll to the outside. Laredo goes for a Plancha into a Rana, but Jake rolls through it and into a Powerbomb on the outside. Both head back in, early pinfall attempt only gets two, but Laredo is reeling after the Powerbomb.

Vader Hammer style strike into an Into the Void attempt but Laredo counters and then starts a little ducking and weaving. Jake goes for a charge and eats turnbuckle as Laredo is floating between ropes, Jake tries to fire but eats a Code Red DDT for a near fall. BME from Laredo Kid for another near fall. Satellite Takedown into a Cradle for another close call for Laredo…but as he goes for his next move attempt Jake just catches him with Into the Void and wins!

Thanks I hate it.

AJ Francis & Deaner vs Joe Hendry & Rich Swann

Do we get a heel turn from Swann, does he go 0-5 in the new TNA rebrand or does he finally end up on the winning end? Yeah, the first two are the most likely.

AJ Francis points at Hendry, says he wants Hendry but Rich doesn’t oblige for AJ takes a cheap shot at Joe and then tags Deaner in so Swann and Deaner can finally start the match. Swann rolls early, knocks Deaner to the outside, goes for a Dive but AJ gets in the way to tell Swann he should be with him and not against him. This gives Deaner and opening, he sends Rich reeling, then when he goes for the rope run Joe is there to cut him off. Deaner mouths off to Joe, Joe pulls the Bugs Bunny and points behind Deaner, and Swann is just biding his time with a little dancey dance into a Superkick.

Joe comes in, throws Deaner around a little and then tags back out to Rich, and Rich loses the advantage. Stiff Strike from Deaner into a the hard Irish Whip to the corner, Deaner goes for a second but Swann pulls the Uno Reverse and connects with the Crossbody into some quick offense and then tags out to Hendry. Hendry then initiates the We Believe Chest Chops into a Stalling Vertical Suplex. Hendry hits the kip up and plays to the crowd before hitting his own cheap shot on AJ. Receipts are fun, but that costs Joe the advantage.

AJ tags in and starts manhandling Hendry. Hits his Tennessee Whiskey Knee Strike as Deaner hits the blind tag and Hendry is stuck in the opponents corner. Quick tags between Deaner and AJ keeps Hendry isolated and getting throttled. Francis goes for a Leg Lariat while Hendry is draped on the middle rope, Hendry dodges, AJ crotches himself and Hendry tries some offense. A Dropkick careens AJ back to Joe, Joe goes for the Trust Fall but AJ is too big. AJ goes for a Chokeslam, but Joe counters it into a DDT. Simultaneous tags, Deaner gets lit up, Rolling Thunder for 2. Francis gets in the ring, tries to send a message to Swann but Swann just smacks him. AJ charges, low bridge into Swann hitting a Senton off the apron to wipe out AJ. Lethal Injection from Swann, tags in Hendry, Standing Ovation for the win!

-Wait- Swann finally won a match in new TNA? Color me surprised. After the match, Hendry hogs the limelight a little in the victory and Swann’s face looks like he’s buying AJ’s pitch a bit more. The heel turn seems very much in the works, now just a matter of time.

DDIWAPSEA will be fire. I look forward to the DDIWAPSEA Heavyweight Title.

We get Ali’s inauguration speech next, and its what you would expect. The Good Hands act like typical mooks, Ali’s bland presence is the right level of cringe lameness for a political gimmick and it gets cut off by Chris Sabin of course.  Fight breaks out of course, Intergalatic Pizza Cats or whatever the bad name is make the save and Ali makes a very calm exit flanked by his security (this part is actually great). 

After the inaugural melee, ASH by Elegance cuts off everything before the Xia and Tasha match. The “major announcement” is just that she’s going to have a match next week, but she comes out like a super model and not in an evening gown…so I actually really liked her look tonight. Plus her and Iceman are so delusional and hilarious I can’t help but love this gimmick. 

Tasha Steelz vs Xia Brookside

The rubber match no one wanted gets a stipulation of “winner gets a Knockouts title shot at Sacrifice”. This promises to be miserable and make the Sacrifice card kinda trash. 

Lame strikes, Xia screams like 10 seconds into the match to “fire up” for no reason, completely whiffs a Dropkick so Tasha slams Xia into the corner and brings her out by hitting a Jackhammer for 2. Bad Headscissors into a weak looking Dropkick from Xia and a Running Crossbody for 2. Xia tries to lift Tasha, Tasha goes to the eyes and then a few strikes into a bottom turnbuckle foot choke cause their both like 4 foot 10 instead of 7 feet like Kevin Nash.

Xia tries to fight out of the corner but Tasha stays on top of her with clubbing Axehandles into a kneeling Sleeper. Xia Snapmare to break the Sleeper, Flying Lariat, another Flying Headscissors, too much Screaming out of nowhere, Broken Wings to the corner, Cutter attempt is countered, Brooksie Bomb is countered by Tasha. Gamengiri from Xia knocks Tasha to the ground, Xia with a Baseball Slide into Tasha and then a Running Neckbreaker on the outside.

Both cut the other one off trying to get back into the ring, and the count continues, 10 count happens and Double Count Out is declared. Jordynne will probably just accept both of them as opponents.

Look Jordynne comes out and does what was obvious. The concerning part here is that one on one neither could believably beat Jordynne…but as a Three Way Dance, shenanigans are nearly guaranteed.

The System (Eddie Edwards, Moose & Brian Myers) w/Alisha Edwards vs ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey) & Eric Young

As we’ve established, TNA 6 mans are very Japanese, so the opening salvos are kinda inconsequential. A few mind games, but everyone gets a chance to shine and hit low to mid tier moves to keep things moving. The System side keeps up with quick tags, Back Rakes, Arm Wringers, Headbutts and just general strategy to keep Bey eating offense. Bey flips out of the move from Myers, tags in Ace and sends Myers reeling. Myers powders, Alisha is trying to fan him down, but Ace comes around the corner. Nice little wrinkle for when Ace was the XXX Division Champion and was trying to bang Eddie’s wife, but Eddie is the heel now. Those interactions are always a bit fun.

Lish does a good job at distracting the referee though and allowing System to eventually stop Ace’s momentum and take back over. Lish gets involved a bit by choking Ace on the bottom rope while the ref is distracted and Ace has had no offense in a few minutes. Myers works him over, tags in Moose and Moose is dissecting him with Garvin Style Stomps. EY and Bey are getting frustrated, but Ace is paying the price and getting manipulated. Quick tags keep Ace rocked, but finally a foot up stops Moose, he fights out of the corner, connects on a Roundhouse Kick and uses the momentum of his jump to tilt Moose backwards to tag in Bey…but the referee didn’t see it!

A few moves delayed, but EY takes the hot tag and starts finding offense, there’s a tornado moment that gets sloppy and looks a bit bad after Moose crotches himself on the top rope. 1-2-SWEET landed on Moose, but Eddie breaks up the pin.

 

Overall Score: 7/10

Since we’ve got Sacrifice on March 8th, the logic for stories had to be very quick and dirty. The System potentially in line to get a tag title match after the 6 Man makes sense, Knockouts World title picture is messy but could lend to a weird way in getting the belt off Jordynne, Dango being relevant to the show but not really in any major angle keeps him on people’s radar, Kaz’s threat to Santino can lead to things and Maclin versus Nemeth is happening much earlier than I expected.

Honestly, the only match that is bound to be disappointing is the Knockouts Three Way Dance unless Jordynne really kicks it into overdrive to cover both her opponents weaknesses. Oh yeah, and Alexander Hammerstone officially getting signed it the best news to come out of tonight. So now Hammerman just needs to win at Sacrifice and we’ll start some nice momentum to potentially get him a title shot by Slammiversary or Bound For Glory. Hell if Hammerstone takes the belt off Moose at some point and then Nemeth challenges Hammerstone at something like Bound For Glory; that’s pretty box office when all things are said and done.

 


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Mitchell’s ROH Results & Report! (2/29/24)

Is The Peacock TV Ready?

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Dalton Castle will do it for The Boys!

After weeks of obsessing, and after being faced with a tough decision. Dalton Castle gets his match with Johnny TV, with The Boys on the line! Will Castle SMASH Johnny’s face in once and for all?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship Tournament, Quarterfinal: Taya Valkyrie w/ Johnny TV VS Queen Aminata; Aminata wins and advances.
  • Lee Johnson VS Mike Sydal; Johnson wins.
  • Komander w/ Alex Abrahantes VS Blake Christian; Komander wins.
  • Taiji Ishimori VS Jacoby Watts; Taiji wins.
  • Custody of The Boys: Dalton Castle VS Johnny TV w/ Taya Valkyrie; Johnny wins and takes custody of The Boys.

PLAY BY PLAY

ROH Women’s World Television Championship Tournament, Quarterfinal: Taya Valkyrie w/ Johnny TV VS Queen Aminata!

La Wera Loca says this tournament and that title belong to her, but she’s up against the Queen of Guinea! Will the One and Only African Woman Wrestler in ROH & AEW take one step closer to history? Or will nothing stop Mrs. TV from being TV Champion?

The Code of Honor is upheld, the bell rings, and the fans rally up. Taya taunts Aminata as they get face to face, but then Aminata stands tall to be head, shoulders and chest above! The fans fire up, Aminata reels Taya into a headlock, then hits a takeover. Taya moves around, fights up to her feet, and slips out to hammerlock then headlock and takeover. Aminata headscissors, Taya moves around, and Taya pops free to then get a headlock back. Aminata fights up, powers out the back and steps over to twerk attack! Aminata then wrenches, headlocks and grinds. Taya puts Aminata in a corner, the ref counts, and Taya lets off.

Taya swings but Aminata ducks! Aminata then ROCKS Taya in the corner! And CHOPS! And ROCKS her again! And CHOPS her again! Aminata ROCKS Taya one more time, but Taya avoids the double chop to CHOP! Taya eggs Aminata on but Aminata dodges, fakes the chop and body shots! Aminata whips corner to corner, runs up and hip attacks! Taya sits down, the fans fire up and Aminata twerks into the HIP- NO, Taya dodges and says hecc no! Johnny says Taya’s too smart for that. Aminata storms out after Taya, Taya slides in and Johnny distracts Aminata. Taya DECKS Aminata and Johnny catches her!

Taya is confused, and then both Johnny and Aminata freak out. They tell the other not to touch them, but Taya WRECKS Aminata with a dropkick! Aminata falls, Taya stomps away and says do not touch her man! Taya and Johnny then kiss, and Taya drags Aminata up. Taya brings Aminata around to whip her into railing hard! Aminata sits down and Johnny starts a “Taya! Taya!” chant. Taya slides into the ring but slides out to refresh the count. Taya runs in, but Aminata dodges to send Taya into railing! Aminata storms back up but Taya kicks low. Taya snap suplexes Aminata to the floor!

Aminata writhes while Taya mockingly chants for her. Taya then brings Aminata up and brings her around, to CHOP her against the apron! Taya pushes Aminata in the ring, stomps her, then pushes her around to grab the legs. Taya ties up the legs, pulls hair, but then shifts to the QUEEN ANGELITO! The fans rally for Aminata as she endures and reaches out. Aminata claws her way forward to the ROPEBREAK! The ref counts, Taya lets go, and Aminata grits her teeth as she rises up. Taya runs up but into an elbow! Taya tries again but Aminata ELBOWS again! Taya tries a third time, Aminata goes up and over to sunset flip! TWO!

Taya stands and SPEARS Aminata down! Cover, TWO!! Aminata survives and the fans fire up! Taya has a wild grin but she’s frustrated. “This is your queen?” The fans cheer but Taya mocks them. Taya SPANKS Aminata, drags her up, and the fans chant “She’s Our Queen!” Taya CLUBS Aminata, reels her in, but Aminata fights around to waistlock and GERMAN SUPLEX! The fans fire up while both women are down! Johnny coaches Taya as a standing count starts. Both women rise, stand at 5 of 10, and Taya throws a forearm! Aminata hits back! Taya throws another, so Aminata ROCKS her right back!

Taya fires a flurry of forearms, then winds up, but Aminata wrenches and snap suplexes! Then LARIATS! Then clinches, spins, snapmares and runs, PENALTY KICK! The fans fire up with Aminata while Taya flounders to a corner. Aminata runs side to side to BOOT WASH! Aminata goes corner to corner now, for the HIP ATTACK! The fans fire up again, Aminata covers, TWO!! Taya survives and Aminata grows frustrated. Johnny coaches Taya but the fans rally for Aminata. Aminata drags Taya up, fisherman, but Taya slips free to kick, KICK and LARIAT! Taya roars and Aminata rises. Aminata swings, Taya gets under, BLUE THUNDER BOMB! Cover, TWO!!

Aminata is still in this but Taya still has that wild look in her eyes. Taya gets the legs but Aminata kicks her away! Aminata runs up but Taya BOOTS her! Taya reels Aminata in to underhook, lift and BUTTERFLY BUSTER! Cover, TWO!! Taya is shocked that Aminata survives but the fans are thunderous! Aminata goes to ropes, Taya runs in, but into a BOOT! Aminata ROCKS Taya with a forearm, rolls her up, TWO! Aminata hurries to HEADBUTT!! Cover, AMINATA WINS!!

Winner: Queen Aminata, by pinfall (advances to the semifinals)

Aminata just brought down a former champion and is in the Final Four! Will Aminata continue to knock people out of this tournament to finally have her crowning moment?

 

Lexi Nair is on stage.

She says, “Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention please. Your ROH Women’s World Champion, Athena, and Billie Starkz have called an emergency MEM (Minion Empowerment Meeting).” And now, Athena & Billie walk out on stage. The fans cheer and Athena smiles as she still has the title around her waist. Athena says, “Hello, Minions.” “Hi~, Athena.” “I said HELLO~ Minions~!” The fans cheer, and Athena says it is very important we start off with this bit of information. She’s read the comments online, everything they had to say about MIT, the Athena family, and how they are falling apart.

Athena thinks it is finally time to address the problem. Lexi Nair! Huh!? Athena says if Lexi doesn’t stop chasing Dalton Castle and every hack around the back, she will take her fist and… Y’know what? Lexi’s place is next to Billie, next to Athena, does she understand? Y-Yes! Athena then smiles and says to business. Last week, Athena was in a historic Best 2 Outta 3 Falls Tables match for her ROH Women’s World Championship. And to be honest, Nyla Rose took Athena to the limit, she presented challenges that Athena didn’t know she’d have to deal with. Nyla was the embodiment of chaos, and showed us why she is a former AEW Women’s World Champion.

The fans do applaud but Athena says also last week, Athena YEETED that hussy right through a table! Didn’t she? The fans applaud and Billie adds, “But what about me last week? I won my first round match last week against Robyn.” The fans do cheer and Athena says yeah, but Robyn Renegade isn’t what Athena would really call… competition. Y-Yeah, but Billie also gets Diamante in the second round. Right… And Billie thinks she can beat “Diabla” without Athena motivating her? Yeah, Billie’s gonna win by herself! The fans cheer and Athena asks Lexi if she thinks Billie can do this.

Lexi nervously says yeah, duh! Athena asks the “Minion Mafia,” do they think Billie can win it all? “YES!” Well then, Billie. You better win the ROH Women’s World TV Championship, or else. Because this is THEIR year, this is the Year of MIT, of Minion Bestie, of Minion 400,237 and three-quarters! And most of all, this is the Year of the Fallen Goddess, the ROH Gatekeeper, the Minion Overlord, the American Joshi, and most of all the inspiration for every woman’s division! This right here is HER show! With HER rules! And if you don’t like that, you can step up, or step out. Mic drop moment and the family heads out. Will Billie bring home the gold to stand beside Athena?

 

Taiji Ishimori VS Jacoby Watts!

It’s a great surprise return to ROH for the Bone Soldier Reborn! Will Taiji prove that Bullet Club is still Too Sweet even as ROH is reborn?

The Code of Honor is skipped as Taiji kicks Jacoby’s hand away. Jacoby takes a swing, Taiji dodges and claws the eyes! The ref reprimands, Taiji whips but Jacoby reverses! Taiji goes out, slides under, slips around and RAMS into Jacoby. Taiji then springboards to SEATED SENTON! The fans fire up with Taiji as he looms over Jacoby. Taiji fist drops Jacoby, then NECK TWISTS him! Jacoby writhes, the fans rally behind “Bone Soldier! Bone Soldier!” Taiji drags Jacoby up for a NECKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Jacoby stays in this but Taiji keeps cool. The fans cheer as Taiji paces around. Taiji goes to a corner then climbs up.

Jacoby stands, Taiji leaps at him, CROSSBODY but Jacoby catches him! Swing and END OF DAYS! Taiji flounders to a corner, Jacoby runs up to fire off haymakers! The ref counts, Jacoby lets off, and then Jacoby whips corner to corner. Jacoby winds up and runs in place, then runs in to clothesline! Jacoby keeps moving and LARIATS Taiji down! Cover, TWO! Taiji survives and the fans rally up. Jacoby stomps Taiji, drags him up, but Taiji kicks low. Taiji claws eyes, whips, but Jacoby reverses. Taiji handsprings to NEURALIZER! Both men are down and the fans rally up again. Taiji goes to ropes and he takes aim, BANG!

Taiji reels Jacoby in but Jacoby fights out of the half hatch. Taiji UPPERCUTS, runs, but Jacoby scoops! Taiji claws eyes and slips free to then wrench, tilt-o-whirl and LA MYSTICA, into BONE LOCK!! Jacoby taps, Taiji wins!

Winner: Taiji Ishimori, by submission

The Bone Soldier brings down Jacoby and has his first win back in ROH. Will he stick around to see if it turns into a title opportunity?

 

Queen Aminata speaks.

“Listen, guys. I told you The Queen would beat Taya, and I actually beat Taya. Y’know, I have to say, that wasn’t easy. My neck is sore, my back feels like crap right now, I don’t feel very juicy. But at the end of the day, this tournament started with 16 women, and I know it will end with only one woman. And that one woman will be the one and only Queen Aminata.” The Queen is ready to win it all now that she got past Mrs. TV, will Aminata soon be the Queen of TV?

 

Custody of The Boys: Dalton Castle VS Johnny TV w/ Taya Valkyrie!

The Peacock has been so obsessed with revenge on the Guru of Greatness for ruining his shot at the ROH World Television Championship, he was ready to do anything to get this chance. Sadly, Johnny used that, and now he wants to take away the two things that mean more to Castle than anything in the world! Will Brandon & Brent have no choice but to leave their Castle? Or will Castle prove once and for all he is more than TV Ready?

Wait, The Iron Savages are here? And Jacked Jameson says they’ve got a little something to help. It’s the Savage Sauce! We all saw how that stuff pepped The Peacock up a month or so ago, and he can definitely use the pick-up! Castle chugs the sauce and he is ALL fired up! “Let’s go break some hearts!” Castle has wanted nothing more in his entire life to SMASH Johnny TV! He gives the Boys a sample of the sauce, and now Castle is feeling the magma flowing through his veins! Castle is back to his old self for the time being, but will he be able to hold onto his Boys?

The introductions are made, the Boys’ hands are raised, and we see who brings ’em home!

The Code of Honor is skipped and the bell rings. Castle and Johnny circle, Johnny ends up in a corner but he dodges Castle’s lunge. Johnny rolls, resets and circles with Castle again. Castle corners Johnny this time, but then Johnny escapes. Johnny lounges on the corner, Castle runs in but Johnny gets away again. Johnny says he can do this all day. But then Castle gets a leg and trips him! Johnny scrambles to the ROPEBREAK! The ref counts but Castle waistlocks Johnny to a corner. The ref pries Castle away and Johnny bails out. Taya protests, that sauce should count as an illegal performance enhancer!

Taya whispers something to Johnny before he slides back in. Johnny and Castle circle, Johnny kicks but Castle blocks, so Johnny pokes him in the eye! Johnny then shoots around to CLUB Castle on the back! Castle bails out, The Boys fans him off, and Taya taunts them all. Castle scowls at Taya but storms back up the steps. Taya tells him, “Get in the ring, loser!” But Castle hops down and he gets the fans fired up! Castle then gets back in, he blocks a punch to CHOP and CHOP and CHOP! Castle whips corner to corner, Johnny reverses and runs in, but Castle pops him up! Johnny holds ropes to stop the Bangarang!

Castle lets Johnny go but then Johnny DUMPS him out! The Boys fan Castle but Johnny goes out to SHINING WIZARD! Johnny hopes they caught that on camera. Then he tells The Boys to come this way. Johnny forces the Boys to back up, and Taya takes a new family selfie! The ref reprimands, this is not the time! The ref takes Taya’s phone away and says they’re not a real family so stop it. But then Johnny sends The Boys at Castle! The Boys stop from colliding with Castle, and Castle gets in. Johnny runs in, handsprings, but into an EXPLODER! The fans fire up as Castle KNEES Johnny down!

Johnny staggers up, Castle bumps him off buckles! And then off more buckles! Castle reels Johnny in for a DDT! The fans fire up with Castle as he rises up. Castle drags Johnny up, reels him in, but Johnny shoves him away. Castle runs back up but Johnny ducks the lariat, only for Castle to LARIAT on return! The fans chant “For The Boys!” while Johnny bails out. Castle pursues but Taya blocks the way! And then Johnny RAMS Castle into railing! The fans rally for Castle while Johnny mockingly pats him on the head. Castle ROCKS Johnny! Taya again stands in the way and says kiss this! Johnny then uses that to POMMEL HORSE KICK Castle!

Taya laughs at Castle while fans boo, but Johnny grins as he tells the Boys, go ahead, fan Castle while they can. Then Johnny whips Castle into steel steps! Taya mockingly asks Castle what’s wrong while Johnny refreshes the count. Johnny KICKS Castle low! And FLAPJACKS Castle off barriers! The fans boo while Johnny shoves Castle in. Johnny brings Castle up, turns him, NECKBREAKER! Johnny grins, strikes a pose, but the fans still rally behind Castle. Johnny cravats for a neck wrench and The Boys keep the fans going. Castle endures, fights up, and he throws body shots! Johnny CLUBS Castle down!

Johnny winds up, aims, but Castle blocks the haymaker to BACK ELBOW! And LARIAT! The fans fire up again and Castle shoots in to clinch and EXPLODER! Johnny staggers back up, into another EXPLODER! Castle has Johnny again, EXPLODER! The hattrick is complete, and the fans rally as Castle clinches for a fourth! The Suplex Peacock is unleashed, and he watches Johnny flounder around. Castle BOOTS Johnny, then GERMAN SUPLEXES! High stack cover, TWO! Johnny survives being thrown around and the fans rally up again. Castle gets around Johnny and hooks an arm so he can throw ELBOWS into the ribs!

Johnny sputters, Castle drags him up, and says time to smash his face! Castle fireman’s carries but Johnny slips free! MOONLIGHT DRIVE! Cover, TWO!! Castle survives and the fans fire up! Johnny is frustrated, Taya coaches him up, and he drags Castle up with a waistlock. Castle slips out the back, waistlocks, but Johnny RAMS him into the corner! Johnny ELBOWS Castle, but Castle BOOTS him back! Castle back suplexes Johnny onto the ropes! Johnny lands on his Mr. Belvedere! The fans chant “No More Babies!” and Castle SAIDOS Johnny off the ropes! Cover, TWO!! Johnny survives and Castle cannot believe it!

Castle drags Johnny up but Johnny ROCKS him with a forearm! Johnny crawls away but Castle grabs a leg! Johnny throws an elbow to get free, but Castle keeps pursuing. Johnny kicks Castle away, drags himself up the ropes, but Castle runs in. Johnny BOOTS him, goes up the corner, and he brings Castle in, but Castle UPPERCUTS him! Castle has Johnny in the crucifix, for a BLACKOUT DRIVER?!? Taya freaks out and throws a Boy into the ring! The ref is busy with, uh, Brent perhaps, while Castle covers! Castle would’ve won by now!! The fans boo and the ref sees it now! Cover, TWO!! Johnny survives because of the delay!

Taya shouts for Johnny to get up, and he flounders up on the apron. Castle storms up but Johnny kicks him low! Johnny laughs, climbs, but Castle kicks out his legs! Castle goes to the adjacent corner and the apron. Castle runs in, but Johnny avoid the boot! Johnny swings, Castle counter punches! But Taya anchors Castle while Johnny distracts the ref ! “This is Awesome!” even as Johnny grabs at Castle over the corner! Johnny drags Castle up using a chinlock, and they go to the top rope. But Castle DECKS Johnny onto the Boys! The ref is again distracted and Taya SHOVES Castle down!! Castle flounders up, into a GAMANGIRI!

Johnny goes to the corner, for the STARSHIP PAIN!! Cover, Johnny wins!!

Winner: Johnny TV, by pinfall (acquires custody of The Boys)

The decision should really say Johnny AND Taya won, because they worked together to screw Castle over! For the second time in his life, Castle must give up The Boys to another! The Last Real Man used The Boys against Castle, will Mr. & Mrs. TV do the same in the 2024 remake no one wanted?


My Thoughts:

A great episode of ROH here, mostly because it was only a little over an hour. I probably could’ve done all the matches because of that, but oh well. Still good to see Mike Sydal back in action, though good win for Lee Johnson off him. And Komander VS Blake turned out to be some great stuff, too. But I got the important tournament match, and how great for Aminata to win, she’s definitely going to be a finalist. And after the really good promo from Athena, Billie & Lexi, Billie is of course going to be the other. Athena adding that “or else” was a nice touch, and oddly makes me think Billie loses so that we get Athena VS Billie 2 down the line, and that is where Billie wins the world title so Athena can move up/over to AEW.

Great to see Taiji in ROH, though of course he was gonna squash Jacoby. Not sure what more this is about other than maybe just a stop over while Taiji also (probably?) visits NJPW Strong. And great main event out of Castle VS Johnny. I had a feeling Johnny was going to win because that would be the more intriguing story. Johnny & Taya are going to force The Boys to adopt a more “TV Ready” style, like sunglasses and fur coats. I expect Castle to be even more distraught and out of it than he was the whole time during this story build, and maybe there’s a rematch to get The Boys back for Supercard of Honor in April. That would be a big moment for ROH’s answer to WrestleMania Weekend.

My Score: 8.7/10


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