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Mitchell’s NJPW Super Jr. Tag League Results & Report! (10/24/23)

Time for Round 2!

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Tonight closes with a grudge match!

Super Junior Tag League has barely just begun, but we already get a top tier match as TJP & Francesco Akira take on Clark Connors & Dan Moloney!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Six Man Tag: Shota Umino, Ren Narita & Oskar Leube VS The United Empire; The United Empire wins.
  • Six Man Tag: Just5Guys VS Los Ingobernables de Japon; Time Limit Draw.
  • NJPW World Television Championship: Zack Sabre Jr. VS Boltin Oleg; ZSJ wins and retains the title.
  • 2023 Super Junior Tag League: BUSHI & Titan VS Ryusuke Taguchi & The DKC; Taguchi & DKC win.
  • 2023 Super Junior Tag League: DOUKI & Taka Michinoku VS Robbie Eagles & Kosei Fujita; Eagles & Fujita win.
  • 2023 Super Junior Tag League: YOH & MUSASHI VS Master Wato & El Desperado; Yoh & Musashi win.
  • 2023 Super Junior Tag League: Intergalactic Jet Setters VS SHO & Yoshinobu Kanemaru; Sho & Kanemaru win.
  • 2023 Super Junior Tag League: Catch 2/2 VS Clark Connors & “Drilla” Dan Moloney; Connors & Moloney win.

PLAY BY PLAY

Here are the current Super Junior Tag League Standings.

Catch 2/2: 1-0, 2 points
Clark Connors & Dan Moloney: 1-0, 2 points
Intergalactic Jet Setters: 1-0, 2 points
Master Wato & El Desperado: 1-0, 2 points
Bushi & Titan: 1-0, 2 points
Yoh & Musashi: 0-1, 0 points
Sho & Yoshinobu Kanemaru: 0-1, 0 points
Ryusuke Taguchi & The DKC: 0-1, 0 points
Douki & Taka Michinoku: 0-1, 0 points
Robbie Eagles & Kosei Fujita: 0-1, 0 points

 

NJPW World Television Championship: Zack Sabre Jr. VS Boltin Oleg!

The Front Man was meant to defend this title against the Young Lion from Kazakhstan, but Oleg’s wrist injury kept him out of action at the time. But now, Oleg is here at 100%, ready to end this title’s “season one!” Will Oleg make this the Boltin Show? Or will he see for himself that The Mighty Don’t Kneel?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see if Oleg makes the most of his 15 minutes of fame!

The bell rings and we’re on the clock. Fans rally as the two circle, and they feel things out. They go around, each man avoids the other’s leg pick, but Oleg almost corners ZSJ. They go again, Oleg puts ZSJ on ropes but the ref counts. Oleg lets off cleanly and the two reset. They feel things out, ZSJ rolls but they still tie up. Oleg waistlocks but ZSJ pries at an arm. Oleg blocks using a leg, smothers the drop toehold and floats around. ZSJ switches, the two separate and fans applaud the exchange. ZSJ and Oleg reset again, feel things out, and Oleg hits as fireman’s carry takeover! Then another! Then a third!

ZSJ goes to ropes and Oleg lets off. Oleg talks a little smack but ZSJ stands. ZSJ fires up for some technical wrestling, and the fans rally. The two tie up collar ‘n’ elbow, are in a deadlock, but Oleg wrenches. Oleg has the wristlock but ZSJ rolls. Oleg still wrangles ZSJ but ZSJ kips up, wrenches and wristlocks, but Oleg wrenches to WRING the arm! ZSJ reaches out with legs but Oleg has a cording hold. ZSJ reaches back to headscissor but Oleg doesn’t budge. ZSJ reaches out with a leg for the ROPEBREAK, and fans cheer as Oleg lets off. Oleg stomps ZSJ, eggs him on, and ZSJ stands. The two reset again and feel things out.

ZSJ KICKS a leg, headlocks, but Oleg powers up and out. Oleg runs ZSJ over! Fans fire up as ZSJ flops out of the ring! Oleg hurries out to fetch ZSJ, stomps him, then ROCKS ZSJ! ZSJ UPPERCUTS! Oleg grins as he CHOPS ZSJ down! Fans fire up, Oleg stands ZSJ up to ROCK him, and then CHOP! ZSJ wobbles in front of the front row but Oleg follows him. ZSJ UPPERCUTS, Oleg eggs him on, so ZSJ UPPERCUTS, and UPPERCUTS! Oleg CHOPS ZSJ down! Fans fire up and Oleg stands ZSJ up. Oleg CHOPS ZSJ against the post! Oleg ROCKS ZSJ, then swings, but ZSJ ducks! The chop HITS POST!

Fans fire up as Oleg holds his hand, but ZSJ whips him into railing! And SLAPS the hand against the barriers! Oleg shakes that hand, ZSJ wrenches and wrangles Oleg to the ground, to STOMP the arm! Fans fire up as we pass five minutes and ZSJ leaves Oleg behind. Oleg shakes out the bad hand, goes back to the ring, but ZSJ stands on him. ZSJ grabs the arm, bends the fingers, but Oleg has the ROPEBREAK! ZSJ STOMPS the bad arm again anyway! ZSJ stands on the fingers, stands on Oleg’s head, then grabs the other arm to twist and torture that hand! ZSJ isolates the arm to STOMP it! Oleg writhes as both hands are in pain!

ZSJ eggs Oleg on, that this is what pro-wrestling is, so Oleg gets up in a huff. Oleg ROCKS ZSJ, but that hurts Oleg’s hand! ZSJ eggs Oleg on, and Oleg CHOPS! Still hurts the hand and ZSJ smirks. Oleg CHOPS, ZSJ blocks, and ZSJ UPPERCUTS the arm! ZSJ whips, Oleg reverses to lift, SPINEBUSTER! Fans fire up as both men are down! Oleg shakes out his hands, stands back up, and he brings ZSJ around to scoop and SLAM! The arms themselves still work, so Oleg picks ZSJ up and whips him corner to corner hard! ZSJ bounces off buckles and falls to the mat! Oleg storms up, brings ZSJ around again, for another scoop and SLAM!

ZSJ writhes, Oleg stalks him, and then whips him corner to corner again. ZSJ goes up and around, but runs into a clinch! So ZSJ turns that to a GUILLOTINE! Bearhug fights facelock, and then Oleg hits an OVERHEAD BELLY2BELLY! Cover, TWO!! Oleg keeps his cool and goes for the legs! ZSJ fights the Crab but Oleg drags him from the ropes. Oleg tries but ZSJ blocks the turn. ZSJ then sits up to fire forearms! ZSJ gets free, fires more forearms, then he UPPERCUTS! Oleg wobbles but comes back to DECK ZSJ! Fans fire up again as Oleg stands ZSJ up. Oleg suplexes, but ZSJ fights it to wrench and PELE the arm!

Oleg snarls, but ZSJ KICKS the arm! And ROUNDHOUSES Oleg! Oleg sputters while he’s down on the mat and fans fire up! ZSJ catches his breath, he and Oleg get back up, and fans rally. ZSJ waits on Oleg, to then KICK him down! Oleg sits up, into another KICK! ZSJ KICKS Oleg again, then waits in a corner. Oleg sits up, but he blocks the Penalty Kick! BEARHUG! OVERHEAD BELLY2BELLY! Ten minutes as Oleg covers, TWO! Time is on ZSJ’s side but Oleg has the legs again. Oleg works to turn ZSJ over, and succeeds! BOSTON CRAB! ZSJ endures, turns back over, but Oleg turns him back over to the BOSTON CRAB!

Oleg sits deep but ZSJ still fights! ZSJ reaches out, powers his way forward, and gets the ROPEBREAK! Oleg lets go quickly and doesn’t lose focus. Oleg stands ZSJ up to fireman’s carry, but ZSJ fights free! IRON OCTOPUS! Oleg endures and powers his way out to the fireman’s carry! ZSJ still fights but Oleg goes to a corner. ROLLING SENTON! Both men are down and fans fire up! Fans rally as we hit the three minute warning! ZSJ and Oleg stand, and Oleg ROCKS ZSJ with a forearm! Oleg eggs ZSJ on so ZSJ UPPERCUTS! ZSJ eggs Oleg on so Oleg ROCKS ZSJ! ZSJ CHOPS! Oleg ROCKS! CHOP! ROCK!

ZSJ rebounds to UPPERCUT! Oleg rebounds to DECK ZSJ again!! Fans fire up but Oleg has to hurry! Oleg roars and hoists ZSJ up again. ZSJ slips free to facelock, Oleg fights to a waistlock, two minute warning as Oleg GERMAN SUPLEXES! Oleg hurries to drag ZSJ up again, fireman’s carries, but ZSJ still fights! HANGING TRIANGLE, into an ARMBAR, but Oleg clasps hands! ZSJ SNAPS the fingers to break the grip! ARMBAR!! Oleg TAPS, ZSJ wins!

Winner: Zack Sabre Jr, by submission (still NJPW World Television Champion)

At 13 minutes and 38 seconds, The Submission Master makes “Ichiban Meat Boy” #JustTapOut! His reign is now 294 days with 15 defenses, will ZSJ make it to one full year with this title? Will there be a sequel to this sleeper hit with Oleg some day?

 

2023 Super Junior Tag League: BUSHI & Titan VS Ryusuke Taguchi & The DKC!

Los Ingobernables de Japon’s Black Mask & El Inmortal won big on opening night, and now kick off round 2! But will they keep things tranquilo? Or will the Funky Weapon and Dylan Kyle Cox finally click as the new team on the block?

Fans rally for Titan, then chant for “D K C! D K C!” DKC steps up, LIJ fist bump, and Titan steps up. The bell rings and the two circle. Fans are stronger for Titan as he and DKC tie up. They go around, break, then go again. DKC waistlocks but Titan spins to facelock. DKC wrenches, Titan rolls, kips up and bridges, to then handspring and wrench. DKC spins, slips under, sunset flips, TWO! The two stand off and the fans applaud. DKC and Titan reset, feel things out, and Titan trips DKC. Things speed up, Titan cartwheels then sidesteps, but DKC handsprings through a hip toss to arm-drag! Fans cheer as DKC storms up.

DKC kicks, whips, but Titan reverses to TORNADO- NO, DKC slips free. Titan sends DKC out, DKC rams Titan and springboards to MISSILE DROPKICK! Titan bails out, fans fire up, and DKC builds speed. Titan is back to springboard CROSSBODY! Direct hit and fans fire up again. DKC still kicks first, then whips. Titan reverses to TORNADO DDT! Now it hits, and DKC bails out! Fans fire up, Titan builds speed, but Taguchi runs interference! The ref reprimands, but Bushi attacks DKC! Titan takes a swing, Taguchi evades then throws Titan down by his mask, but Titan kips up to PELE!

Taguchi falls, Bushi sets him up next to DKC and fans rally up as Titan builds speed. Titan FLIES to take out DKC & Taguchi! Fans fire up even more as Titan rises up. Titan drags DKC up and into the ring, covers, ONE! Titan drags DKC up, spins to fireman’s carry, and AIR RAID CRASH! Tag to Bushi and he stomps DKC around. Bushi drags DKC up, puts him in a corner, then stomps him. Bushi CHOPS, CHOPS and CHOPS, then he pushes DKC down. Cover, TWO! Fans rally, Bushi drags DKC up, and Bushi wrenches to wristlock. Tag to Titan, he climbs up, and he DOUBLE STOMPS DKC’s arm! Fans rally as Titan brings DKC up.

Titan snapmares, then runs to redirect and basement dropkick! Cover, TWO! Tag back to Bushi, and he drags DKC up. But DKC CHOPS! And CHOPS! And CHOPS! And CHOPS! Titan CLUBS DKC down, BLASTS Taguchi, then helps Bushi. They stand DKC to double whip, but DKC CANNONBALLS them both down! Fans fire up, DKC crawls over, hot tag to Taguchi! Taguchi HIP ATTACKS Bushi, HIP ATTACKS Titan, repeat! Baseball slide and APRON HIP for Bushi! Fans fire up as Bushi springboards, MISSILE HIP! Cover, TWO! Taguchi hurries to call upon the powers of Strong Style, and he goes to the corner, “ORYA~!”

But Bushi ducks the Bum-a-ye! Bushi stomps Taguchi, stands on the groin, and the ref reprimands! The ref counts, Bushi lets off and Taguchi is almost comatose! Bushi stomps Taguchi, covers, TWO!! Taguchi gets that arm up and he sputters back to life. Bushi stands Taguchi up to knee low then whip. Taguchi reverses but Bushi sunset flips. Taguchi stays up, the tights come down, GREEN TEA BAG! Titan BOOTS Taguchi off the cover! Titan checks Bushi and says he smells. Bushi is gagging, Titan stomps Taguchi for this, and LIJ double whip. They trip then basement dropkick then FLYING SPLASH! Cover, DKC breaks it!

Fans rally, DKC stomps Bushi but Titan mule kicks DKC. Titan TOSSES DKC, LIJ regroups and fans fire up. Titan powers up and runs in, LOCO LARIAT! CODE BREAKER! Bushi holds Taguchi, but DKC trips Titan! Taguchi slips around to OH MY GAH ANKLE!! Bushi flails, reaches out, but Taguchi stands him up to chicken wing! But Bushi victory rolls! TWO and Taguchi has it, TAGUCHI & DKC WIN!!

Winners: Ryusuke Taguchi & The DKC, by pinfall (gains 2 points; LIJ earns 0)

That finish was nuts! Er, uh, wild! Taguchi wins by the seat of his pants, and now he and DKC are rolling! Will they keep this going until they’re the top of the block? Will Bushi & Titan have to fight harder to avoid being the bottom?

 

2023 Super Junior Tag League: DOUKI & Taka Michinoku VS Robbie Eagles & Kosei Fujita w/ Zack Sabre Jr!

Japones Del Mal & The Blue Playmaker couldn’t get going in the opening round, but neither could TMDK’s Sniper of the Skies & Ichiban Sweet Boy. Will Douki & Taka better represent for Just5Guys? Or will Eagles & Fujita stay mighty this time?

The teams sort out and Douki starts against Fujita. The fans rally as the two circle. They feel things out, tie up, and Douki headlocks. Douki grinds Fujita down but Fujita fights up. Fujita powers out but Douki runs him over! Things speed up, Fujita hurdles but Douki waistlocks. Fujita switches and shoves, ducks ‘n’ dodges to RANA! Fans fire up as Taka runs in but Fujita dodges to SHOTGUN Taka out! Fans rally, Fujita builds speed, and he FLIES! Direct hit on Taka & Douki, and he even tumbles into the Young Lions protecting the front row! Fans fire up for this truly interactive experience as Fujita stands back up.

Fujita puts Douki in the ring, tags Eagles, and Eagles drags Douki up. Fujita SHOTGUNS Douki into the SAIDO! Cover, TWO! Douki hangs tough but Eagles bumps him off buckles. Tag back to Fujita, TMDK double wrench and double lift, but Douki fights that to crisscross them up! Douki sends Eagles into Fujita, NECKBREAKER DDT COMBO! Tag to Taka and he stomps Fujita. Taka drags Fujita up, headlocks, and he holds on as Fujita tries to power out! Fujita keeps trying, but Taka wrenches and headlocks and hits the takeover to then get a headscissor necklock! Fujita scrambles to the ROPEBREAK and Taka lets off.

Taka drags Fujita up, throws knees, then bumps him off Douki’s boot. Tag to Douki, they double whip and double CHOP, to then stand Fujita back up, Camel Clutch DROPKICK! Taka BLASTS Eagles, and Douki puts Fujita in a leg lock full nelson! It’s like an Inverted Italian Stretch! Fujita endures, fights around, but Douki holds onto his arms. Fujita keeps kicking forward, and he reaches out to ROPEBREAK! The fans cheer and Douki lets off quickly. Fujita stands to fire forearms, but Douki eggs him on. Fujita fires another shot but Douki CHOPS! Douki whips, Fujita reverses and CHOPS! Douki HELL STABS! Douki runs, Fujita WHEEL KICKS!

Fans fire up while both men are down! Douki and Fujita crawl, hot tag to Eagles! Eagles dodges Douki, waistlocks, Douki switches and back suplexes but Eagles lands out! CHOP BLOCK and BLINDSIDE LARIAT! Taka runs in, Eagles dodges, kip up and WHEEL KICK! Fans fire up with Eagles, he runs in at Douki in the corner to DOUBLE KNEE! Roll back and- BOOT from Douki! But BASEMENT 619 sweeps the legs! And then DOUBLE KNEES again! Eagles drags Douki to a stack, TWO! Douki is still in this as we pass five minutes but Eagles stands Douki up. Douki fights the backpack to CLUB Eagles!

Eagles spins around to SPINEBUSTER, and RON MILLER SPECIAL! Douki scrambles to the ROPEBREAK! Eagles lets off the leglock, then drops knees on the knee! Fans rally as Eagles climbs, to 450- NO, he has to bail out as Douki moves! Eagles SOBATS, cravats, but no Sliced Bread! Douki pump handles, flips and ghost pins Eagles, TWO! ITALIAN STRETCH #32!! Eagles endures the “Douki Chokey” while Taka takes out Fujita! Eagles crawls, but Douki rolls him from the ropes! ITALIAN STRETCH! Eagles endures, reaches around, but Douki drags him away again! ITALIAN STRETCH PIN, TWO!!

Eagles is free, Douki runs in but Eagles elbows him! And puts him on the apron! But Douki RAMS Eagles, slingshots, but no Daybreak! Eagles cravats to ASAI DDT! Both men are down, they both crawl, hot tags to Fujita and Taka! Fans rally as Fujita SHOTGUNS Taka! Fans rally, Fujita fires off forearms and UPPERCUTS and a CHOP! Fujita whips, Taka reverses but Fujita goes up and over to O’Conner, CHAOS- NO, Taka fights the suplex. But Fujita CHOPS again! Taka staggers around, Fujita reels him in and says he’ll end this! Suplex, but Taka fights to a takedown, and JUST FACELOCK!! Fujita scrambles to the ROPEBREAK!

Taka lets off fast to haul Fujita up. Fujita fires forearms, whips, but Taka reverses to drop toehold and JUST FACELOCK!! Fujita endures, but Taka flips him and has the headscissors! Taka bends the arm and twists the wrist! KIMURA!! Taka covers, TWO!! Leglock cover, TWO!! JUST FACELOCK!!! Douki BLASTS Eagles, builds speed and DIVES! Direct hit and they hit the front row! ZSJ coaches Fujita but Taka rolls Fujita from ropes! Taka CLUBS away, JUST FACELOCK!! And it is deep!! Fujita endures, fights around, claws his way forward, but Taka grins as he grabs that arm! Taka shifts to COBRA FACELOCK!! But Fujita ROPEBREAKS!!

Taka lets off fast, he sets Fujita up for Douki. Shoulder, knee strike, DAYBREAK!! SHINING WIZARD!!! Cover, EAGLES BREAKS IT! Douki stomps Eagles, TOSSES him out, and Taka drags Fujita back up. Taka scoops, but Fujita cradle counters! TWO!!! Taka escapes, Fujita runs up, but into a CALF KICK! Taka hauls Fujita up and scoops, btu Fujita slips free! Eagles ROUNDHOUSES, SUPERKICKS and ENZIGURIS! Fujita reels Taka in, suplex to CUTTER!! Cover, TMDK WINS!

Winners: Robbie Eagles & Kosei Fujita, by pinfall (gains 2 points; Douki & Taka earn 0)

Fujita busts out his finisher for the first time in NJPW and gets a massive win! Whatever name that move will get, will it be what helps Ichiban Sweet Boy & The Sniper make this a mighty Super Junior Tag League?

 

2023 Super Junior Tag League: YOH & MUSASHI VS Master Wato & El Desperado!

Team Dream Drive misfired at the start of the tournament, while the odd couple of Grandmaster and Rogue Luchador somehow made it work. Will Yoh & Musashi kick things into gear and get on the board? Or will Wato & Despy somehow make it work two rounds in a row?

Wait, what’s this? Now Yoh & Musashi are having problems? Something about Yoh making shirts for the team and Musashi forgetting to wear one? Yoh says they’re doing this from the top! They go backstage again, Wato is a bit confused, but Desperado sees Yoh is just poking fun at them. The song is now Michinoku Pro, Musashi’s home promotion! And they are wearing the shirts! Er, wait, Musashi’s is different from Yoh’s. Special variant edition? Desperado has a headache now. And apparently the team name is now “MUSAKO,” combining Musashi and “Komatsu,” Yoh’s surname.

Well, #MUSAKO get in the ring to join #DespeWato, and the teams sort out. Desperado and Wato argue about who gets Musashi, and Desperado makes Wato stand down. Fans rally for “MU-SA-SHI!” but then Yoh tricks Desperado. Desperado says nope and bails out, so Wato starts by default. The bell rings and fans rally up. Wato and Yoh circle, tie up, and Yoh waistlocks. Yoh shoves Wato at Desperado! Desperado avoids colliding with Wato, Wato goes back for Yoh but Yoh shoves him back at Desperado! Another near collision, but then Yoh SHOVES Wato into Desperado! Yoh taunts Desperado, he runs in, but Yoh arm-drags him!

Musashi runs Desperado over, then Musako double hip toss Wato! DespeWato bails out, Musako build speed but then fake them out, and say kiss this! BLEH~! Fans cheer, Desperado gets pissed but Wato stops him from storming in with a chair. Desperado throws the chair down and throws a tantrum elsewhere. Wato gets in, Yoh CLUBS him and bumps him off buckles. Tag to Musashi, he scoops Wato to SLAM him! Then Musashi scrapes soles off Wato’s face! Musashi drags Wato up, bumps him off buckles and tags in Yoh. Yoh stomps Wato, ROCKS him, then wrenches and whips Wato to ropes. Wato slips around and BULLDOGS Yoh!

Wato TOSSES Yoh out, and Desperado is there to POST him! Fans fire up as Wato BLASTS Musashi and Desperado DECKS Yoh! Desperado and Musashi see each other, talk some trash, but then Wato CLUBS Musashi on the back! And again! The ref reprimands but Desperado SMACKS Yoh off the apron. Wato gets in the ring and waits while Yoh is down. The ring count starts, Wato tags Desperado, and Desperado watches Yoh stir. The count is 8 of 20 as Yoh stirs. Musashi coaches him up but Desperado goes out to fetch Yoh into the ring. Fans cheer and Desperado drags Yoh up to scoop and SLAM!

Desperado drags Yoh around by his legs, turns him over, and has the BOSTON CRAB! Yoh endures, Desperado stares Musashi down, then he turns Yoh over to stomp him down. Tag to Wato, Wato drags Yoh up, and Wato KICKS Yoh down! Cover, TWO! Wato has an arm, and he drags Yoh into a CAMEL CLUTCH! Yoh endures, Wato stares Musashi down, and then Desperado walks over to SMACK Musashi off the apron! Yoh continues to endure, even as Wato bends him back. Yoh fights around and has the ROPEBREAK! Wato lets off to stomp Yoh, and Wato asks for a tag. Desperado doesn’t want to but Wato makes him tag.

Fans rally, Wato and Desperado double whip Yoh to a corner, but they both want to run in! They stop, argue, Desperado pushes Wato but Wato pushes back. Yoh runs in but into double kicks! DespeWato double whip, but Yoh crisscrosses them and DOUBLE SHOTGUNS! Fans fire up as all three are down! Yoh crawls, reaches out, hot tag to Musashi! Musashi rallies on DespeWato with big forearms! Desperado knees low, shouts to Wato, and the two double whip. But Musashi breaks the clothesline, sends Wato’s kick into Desperado, then waistlocks. Wato switches, Musashi moves around, switches back, but Wato switches again.

Musashi fights the German Suplex but Desperado storms up. Musashi ducks and the haymaker hits Wato! Wato staggers and falls over, Musashi ENZIGURIS Desperado! Fans rally up, Musashi storms up on Desperado, and Musashi drags Desperado up to clinch. Desperado fights the lift, they go to ropes, and the ref counts. Musashi knees low, whips, but Desperado reverses. Musashi ducks ‘n’ dodges to dropkick a leg, then he DROPKCISK Desperado! Cover, TWO! Musashi keeps cool and brings Desperado up. Musashi clinches but Desperado arm-drags free! Desperado blocks a superkick and he CHOPS!

Musashi CHOPS back! But Desperado blocks the superkick to hit a BIG back suplex! Fans fire up with Desperado and he drags Musashi up. Musashi fights the gut wrench and waistlock but Desperado elbows free. Desperado runs, but into an elbow! Musashi runs but into an elbow! Desperado runs, just to bait Musashi into a SPINE- NO, Musashi fights that to a NECKBREAKER and SUPERKICK! Desperado wobbles into the clinch, EXPLODER! Fans fire up as Musashi runs in, but into a SPINEBUSTER! Both men are down and fans fire up again! Musashi and Desperado crawl, hot tags to Wato and Yoh!

Wato rallies on Yoh, a BOOT and a whip, then the CALF KICK! Fans fire up with Wato, he storms up on Yoh in the corner, and Wato whips corner to corner. Wato runs in but Yoh pops him up and out. Wato blocks a punch, Yoh avoids the gamangiri and HANDSPRING KICKS! Yoh then PLANCHAS and down goes Wato! Fans fire up with Yoh, and Yoh brings Wato up. Yoh puts Wato in the ring, stands him up and scoop SLAMS! Yoh goes up to TWISTING VAIDER! Cover, TWO! Wato is still in this but Yoh keeps cool. Yoh stands Wato up, reels him in, and suplexes, but Wato slips free. Yoh ducks a kick, Wato blocks the elbow to BOOT! ZIGZAG!

Fans fire up, Wato wrenches and traps, RECIENTEMENTE! Cover, TWO!! Yoh survives but Wato fires up! Wato drags Yoh up, chicken wings, but Yoh fights that! Yoh elbows free, full nelsons, but Wato breaks that to waistlock! But Yoh fights the suplex to RAM Wato to a corner! Musashi runs in to forearm! POETRY IN MOTION! Musashi BLASTS Desperado, then helps Yoh. Wato fights the suplex, but they block his kick to dropkick a leg and DRAGON SCREW! Fans fire up as Yoh hauls Wato up! Suplex, SUPERKICK to FALCON ARROW! Cover, Desperado breaks it!! Fans fire up as Desperado shoves Musashi, but Muashi spins him around!

Musashi snapmares Desperado out then builds speed to FLY! Direct hit but a bit close to the apron, too! Musashi even thinks he has to cover Desperado out there! Yoh pounds the mat, fans fire up, and Wato rises. Yoh roars, reels Wato in, and Musashi goes up the corner. FALCON GOROSHI to a Musashi FROG SPLASH! Yoh then underhooks the arms to DIRECT DRIVE!! Cover, Musako wins!

Winners: Yoh & Musashi, by pinfall (gains 2 points; Wato & Desperado earn 0)

The new shirts might’ve been the lucky charms for this match as Musashi Komatsu leaves the station! Will they ride this momentum all the way to the top of the Super Junior Tag League? Or can DespeWato find a way to make this dysfunction function in their favor?

 

2023 Super Junior Tag League: Intergalactic Jet Setters VS SHO & Yoshinobu Kanemaru!

Kushida & Kevin Knight are flying high after opening night, but they’re up against the House of Torture now. Will the former tag champs still stay in the air? Or will the Murder Machine & Heel Master use every trick in the book to bring them down?

The teams sort out and the House attacks! Fans boo as Sho goes after Kushida and Kanemaru goes after Knight. The bell rings, Sho TOSSES Kushida out while Kanemaru digs boots into Knight in a corner. The ref reprimands, Kanemaru lets off and he drags Knight up. Kanemaru whips Knight corner to corner but Knight BOOTS him back! Knight runs but into a low kick. Knight still throws a forearm but Kanemaru rakes eyes! Kanemaru scoops, Knight slips free to shove and scoop SLAM! Then SPLASH! Sho runs in, into a scoop SLAM! Kushida runs in, is a backpack on Knight, “SUPER MARIO~” SPLASH!

Fans fire up as Knight finally takes the jacket off. Knight drags Kanemaru up, tags Kushida and Kushida CLUBS Kanemaru’s arm. Kushida cravats, throws knees, then wrenches an arm. Kushida whips just to reel Kanemaru back in to CLUB the arm, and drop a knee on it! Fans rally as Kushida wrenches Kanemaru to a top wristlock. Kushida puts the arm on ropes, throws elbows, then lets off to whip. Kanemaru reverses and Sho trips Kushida! Kanemaru BLASTS Knight, Sho whips Kushida into barriers! Fans have to clear out as Sho grabs chairs to JAM Kushida! Fans boo but Sho jams Kushida more!

Kanemaru SMACKS Knight off the timekeeper’s desk! The ref reprimands, makes Sho let the chair go and Sho “apologizes.” He says a fan made him do it. Sho drags Kushida up and throws body shots. Sho brings Kushida over, puts him in the ring and Kanemaru drags Kushida up. Kanemaru whips to CLOBBER Kushida, then he scrapes Kushida’s face! Sho steps in, and Kanemaru bumps Kushida off Sho’s boot. Tag to Sho, and he grins as he stalks Kushida. Sho keeps Kushida from Knight with a chinlock, then he BOOTS Knight down! Sho drags Kushida up but Kushida KICKS him in the leg! So Sho claws Kushida’s face!

The ref has to keep Knight back, even as Sho CHOKES Kushida on ropes! Tag to Kanemaru and he kicks Kushida around. Fans rally for Kushida as the House toy with him. Kushida fires forearms, but Kanemaru rakes eyes! The House double whip but Kushida handsprings to DOUBLE BACK ELBOW! Fans fire up, Kushida crawls, but DICK TRIPS KNIGHT! Fans boo as the Spoiler shows up again. Kanemaru stomps Kushida, Dick stomps Knight, and Kanemaru suplexes high and hard! Cover, TWO! Kushida hangs tough but Kanemaru knees Kushida in the back again and again! Fans rally but Kanemaru whips Kushida into the corner hard!

Kushida falls, Kanemaru tags Sho, and Sho grins as he stalks Kushida. Kanemaru BOOTS Knight, Sho digs his boots into Kushida. Kanemaru CHOKES Kushida, the ref counts, and the House lets off. They double whip corner to corner, but Kushida dodges Kanemaru to kick Sho! Kanemaru kicks and whips but Kushida reverses to send Kanemaru into Sho! Hot tag to Knight, springboard DOUBLE CROSSBODY! Fans fire up as Knight fires off forearms and CHOPS! Kanemaru & Sho kick low, double whip, but Knight leaps the line to DOUBLE PELE! Fans are thunderous as Knight has targets in opposite corners.

Knight runs to SPLASH Sho, then SPLASH Kanemaru! Knight whips Kanemaru into Sho, runs in and DOUBLE SPLASHES! Fans fire up as Knight puts Sho up, TOP FLOOR RANA! Cover, Kanemaru breaks it! Kanemaru intercepts Kushida, kicks and runs, but Kushida dodges and Knight DROPKICKS! Kushida WRECKS Dick for good measure! Knight kips up, and Kushida Electric Chair Lifts Sho! Fans fire up but here comes Evil & Yujiro! The Tokyo Pimp distracts the ref while the King of Darkness drags Knight out of the ring! Fans boo the same old dirty tricks! Kushida still ROCKS Sho and puts him in a Tree of Woe!

Kanemaru runs in but Kushida sends him into Sho! And sits him down, to then TOSS Dick! Kushida drop toeholds Dick into Kanemaru’s Little Richard! And Kushida handsprings to DOUBLE KICK Evil & Yujiro! Fans are thunderous as Kushida and Knight coordinate. Kushida helps Knight go COAST2COAST and hit the whole pile!! Fans fire up and Kushida drags Sho out of that mess. Kushida Electric Chair Lifts, TIME2FLY!! Down goes Sho and Knight covers, TWO?!?! Sho survives and shocks everyone! Knight argues the count but the ref says that was still fair. So Knight fires up to finish this!

Kushida has Kanemaru’s arm in a HOVERBOARD, Knight runs up on Sho! But Sho THROWS Knight into the ref! Fans can’t believe it but Sho claws Knight’s face! Sho throws Knight down then gets his Murder Tool! Fans boo as Sho aims, but Knight dodges, dodges and LEAPING LARIATS! Fans fire up, Kushida joins in, and they set Sho up again! Knight whips, Sho reverses, Kushida gives him the BOOST, but into WHISKEY MIST!! Kanemaru BOOTS Kushida, gets the bottle, and he SMASHES Knight! Fans boo more as Evil puts the ref back in. Sho drags Knight up, reels him in and tucks the arms, to SHOCK ARROW!! Cover, The House of Torture wins!

Winners: Sho & Yoshinobu Kanemaru, by pinfall (gains 2 points; Intergalactic Jet Setters earn 0)

It took ALL the tricks to ground Knight’s flight, and now the House is on the board! Will Sho & Kanemaru find a way to keep winning, even with everyone knowing their tactics? Can Knight & Kushida refuel and fly again in the next round?

 

2023 Super Junior Tag League: Catch 2/2 w/ Callum Newman VS Clark Connors & “Drilla” Dan Moloney!

Now this is the definition of a grudge match. TJP & Franceso Akira accepted Drilla into the United Empire but he betrayed them to be a Bullet Club War Dog. Then he and 100 Proof took the titles away and have rubbed it in everyone’s faces ever since. Will the Public Enemy & Nova Fireball get sweet revenge to end the round? Or will the Abunai Gaijin unload a Full Clip?

Wait, Akira & TJP DOUBLE PLANCHA! Down goes Drilla and Connors! Fans fire up as the brawl is on! TJP holds up the tag titles, then Akira CHOPS Drilla! The bell rings, TJP DECKS Connors, and Akira SMACKS Drilla off English commentary! Henare is there to cheer on his guys, and TJP brings Connors around. TJP RAMS Connors into the stands behind Japanese commentary, and Great-O-Khan is there to cheer TJP on! TJP sits Connors on the ledge, and gives him some scrubs! The fans fire up with each one, and TJP goes along the ledge, to run back in and BOOT WASH! Fans cheer and TJP drags Connors back.

But Drilla attacks TJP! And SMACKS him off the timekeeper’s desk! Drilla has a chair, but TJP dodges the shot! So Drilla flips the table onto him! Callum Newman tries to help TJP but Drilla POSTS him! Connors snap suplexes Newman! Fans boo but there’s nothing that can be done about Bullet Club mugging Newman! Drilla wipes his butt with a United Empire towel! Fans boo more but Bullet Club just soaks it up. Quadruple middle fingers and they go back for Catch 2/2. Drilla puts TJP in the ring, Connors ROCKS Akira, but then Akira UPPERCUTS Connors! Drilla whips, TJP reverses, and Akira joins in to DOUBLE HIP TOSS!

Akira FIST DROPS Drilla, Drilla sits up into TJP’s PENALTY KICK! Fans fire up as Catch 2/2 keep going, “Take picture!” for the Electric Chair Lift, but Drilla bails out. Catch 2/2 turns around, they kick Connors first then double whip. SOBAT! KICK! Trip, SHOTGUN! Fans fire up as they try again, “Take picture!” Drilla returns, TJP throws Akira, SHOTGUN SENTON COMBO! Fans fire up again as TJP gives Drilla some scrubbing in the corner! TJP goes side to side to BOOT WASH! Fans fire up and chant “One More Time!” TJP nods and gives Drilla some scrubbing, then a BOOT WASH! Fans cheer as Drilla’s beard is very clean now.

TJP rallies the fans up and he brings Drilla around. TJP ROCKS Drilla, but Connors sneaks a tag before the whip. Drilla reverses, drops under TJP to then BLAST Akira while Connors POUNCES TJP! Fans boo as Connors says crowns down and he scuffs TJP. Connors CHOPS TJP, Drilla BOOTS Newman, then Connors puts TJP in a corner. Connors CHOPS again, then pulls TJP’s shirt up to CHOP him down! Drilla soaks the heat up and Connors digs his boots in. Red Shoes counts, Connors tags Drilla, then Connors BLASTS Akira! Drilla gives forearm scrubs to TJP’s face, then runs side to side to CLOBBER him!

Fans rally for TJP but Drilla snarls as he paces around TJP. Drilla taunts the fans, stands on TJP’s hand, then stomps the arm! TJP goes to a corner, Drilla CHOPS him again! Drilla shouts at TJP, bumps him off buckles, and TJP falls. Drilla stands on TJP’s leg, tags in Connors, and Connors stomps TJP. Connors drags TJP up, snap suplexes, then swaggers before the ELBOW DROP! “Who sucks now, b*tch!?” Fans boo but Connors eggs them on. The fans rally for TJP but Connors stays between him and Akira. Connors BLASTS Akira, CLUBS TJP, then whips TJP to a corner. TJP bounces off buckles and into a LARIAT!

Drilla loves it as Connors paces around TJP. Connors drags TJP back up, whips him to a corner hard and TJP flops down! Fans boo but Drilla laughs, and Connors tells the fans to shut up. Connors stands TJP up, whips him to a corner hard, and then runs to BOOT Akira! Connors runs in but TJP BOOTS back! TJP ELBOWS Drilla, goes up and over Connors and TORNADO DDTS! Fans fire up while both men are down! Connors and TJP crawl, hot tags to Akira and Drilla! Akira holds back as Drilla runs in, and he goes up and over to SHOTGUN Drilla! Fans fire up for “A! KI-RA!” Akira runs in to clothesline! And then he comes back, but Drilla dodges!

Drilla returns but Akira ROUNDHOUSES him down! MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Drilla sputters but Akira CHOPS him! And CHOPS him again! Akira reels Drilla in but Drilla fireman’s carries. Akira fights with elbows, shoves Drilla, and TJP shoves Drilla for Akira to chicken wing. TJP SUPERKICKS Drilla into the TIGER FIRE PLEX! Bridging cover, TWO! Drilla escapes but the fans rally up. Akira watches Drilla rise, then reels him in. SPEED- NO, Drilla slips free! Akira dodges the lariat, but not the SPINEBUSTER! Nor the DOUBLE STOMPS! Both men are down, fans fire up, and hot tags to Connors and TJP!

TJP springboards to FLYING FOREARM! TJP whips, Connors ducks ‘n’ dodges, but the THESZ PRESS hits! TJP throws his shirt to the crowd, free souvenir! Connors stands, TJP runs in, tilt-o-whirl into IRON OCTOPUS! Akira catches Drilla to a GUILLOTINE! Fans fire up for the stereo submissions! GROUND COBRA, TWO!! Drilla throws Akira off, TJP SOBATS Connors! Drilla SUPERKICKS TJP but Akira SUPERKICKS Drilla! Akira dodges Connors to victory roll, STOMP 182! Akira calls to TJP and they coordinate! Akira brings Connors up, but Connors UPPERCUTS! Akira runs back in, but Connors dumps him out!

Connors runs but Akira goes to the corner, to ASAI MOONSAULT Drilla! Connors has to stop himself, and that lets TJP hit the EYE OF THE HURRICANE! TJP goes up, MAMBA SPLASH!! Cover, TWO!! Connors survives and fans fire back up! Akira hurries up, TJP fireman’s carries, and they LEANING TOWER CUTTER!! Cover, Drilla breaks it! All four men are down and the fans rally back up. TJP rises, Drilla storms up on him, but Akira jumps off TJP, DESTROYER for Drilla!! Fans fire up again as TJP drags Connors into position. The fans cheer, “CATCH! NI-NI!” Akira & TJP coordinate, run in, 2- NO, Connors moves and TJP wipes Akira out!!

TJP freaks out, and Connors POWERSLAMS him down! Drilla is back, Connors tags him in! They coordinate now, aim at TJP, DOUBLE GORE!! Cover, TWO?!?! TJP survives being run over and the fans are thunderous! Bullet Club is furious but they fire themselves up again. Connors goes up, Drilla reels TJP in, but Akira creeps up. TJP knees free, Akira springboards to SUPER STEINER Connors! And then TJP backslides Drilla, TWO!!! DOUBLE LARIATS wipe out Drilla and TJP! All four men are down again and the fans rally up. Drilla goes to his corner, as does TJP. Connors tags in, he runs in but TJP goes up and over!

TJP TORNADO- NO, Connors shoves TJP into Red Shoes! Fans boo as Red Shoes falls, and Connors sees this as his opening! He grabs one of the tag title belts, and he aims at TJP! But Akira sends the other belt to TJP! They dare each other to make a move, but then TJP throws the belt to Connors? Because he wants Red Shoes to catch Connors red handed! Or is it gold handed? Connors tries to defend his innocence but Red Shoes takes the belts form him. TJP rolls Connors up! TWO!! Connors tosses a belt to TJP, TJP throws it away, but Connors gets him for NO CHASER!! Drilla has Akira, flips him inside-out then deadlifts to DRILLA KILLA!!!

Connors goes up, Drilla suplexes TJP, FULL CLIP!!! Cover, Bullet Club wins!

Winner: Clark Connors & “Drilla” Dan Moloney, by pinfall (gains 2 points; Catch 2/2 earns 0)

TJP & Akira fall, and now the IWGP Junior Heavyweight Tag Team Champions are the ONLY undefeated team in this tournament! And then Drilla gives Newman a DRILLA KILLA for the hell of it!! Connors puts chairs in the ring, and Drilla puts one around Akira’s neck!? Connors tells everyone, from the Young Lions to The United Empire members on commentary, that if they step one foot in the ring, “this son of a b*tch is dead!” Henare snarls but Connors says they don’t have to kill ’em! Catch 2/2 is already is dead! Drilla says “What good are dead men without a burial? The Cowboy and the Criminal just took care of that! A burial and sendoff fit for a couple of kids.”

Connors then asks, “Do you know why? Because that’s my dog for real!” Connors then SMACKS TJP on the back with his chair! Khan & Henare finally rush in, but Bullet Club scurries away! Drilla doesn’t like how the one Young Lion is looking at him, so he DECKS him! The Abunai Gaijin show no mercy and no respect, will they have no problems running the table? Or will this only motivate everyone left to fight their absolute hardest to stop them?

 

Here are the NEW Super Junior Tag League Standings!

Clark Connors & Dan Moloney: 2-0, 4 points
Catch 2/2: 1-1, 2 points
Yoh & Musashi: 1-1, 2 points
Master Wato & El Desperado: 1-1, 2 points
Ryusuke Taguchi & The DKC: 1-1, 2 points
Bushi & Titan: 1-1, 2 points
Sho & Yoshinobu Kanemaru: 1-1, 2 points
Intergalactic Jet Setters: 1-1, 2 points
Robbie Eagles & Kosei Fujita: 1-1, 2 points
Douki & Taka Michinoku: 0-2, 0 points


My Thoughts:

A great round two for Super Jr. Tag League, and they also snuck that NJPW World Television Championship into this. Great showing from Oleg even in defeat, he can definitely and should definitely come back around for another match with ZSJ, perhaps come WrestleKingdom time. As for SJTL, it is only round two and yet it is shaping up just how I expected. As good as all these teams are, Douki & Taka being dead last while the tag champs are leading 2-0 make all the sense. And even with them being 0-2, Douki & Taka had a great match with Eagles & Fujita to really add heat to Fujita getting his first win on NJPW programming.

And of course that main event was awesome stuff, it was basically a title match right here. Connors & Drilla threatening to cripple Akira was some nasty stuff, but that adds to the kind of vicious Heels they are. They’re definitely going to be rolling for more than half this tournament. Now, a little surprised in some of those 1-1 standings. Taguchi & DKC getting one on LIJ, namely, as I thought LIJ was gonna keep pace with Bullet Club going into whenever we get LIJ VS Bullet Club. But hey, Taguchi & DKC can at least get one to prove themselves as a team.

Yoh & Musashi VS Desperado & Wato was probably the most fun match because of all the antics Yoh was doing to troll Desperado while getting that first win for him and Musashi. And including tonight, we’re getting three straight days of SJTL action, which is pretty cool, but these guys are all gonna have to be careful not to wear themselves out and get hurt in this first half of the round robin.

My Score: 8.8/10


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Mitchell’s ROH Death Before Dishonor Results & Report! (7/26/24)

YEEHAW!

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The word of the day is, “Gold!”

ROH brings Death Before Dishonor to Texas, and makes it bigger than ever! SIX championship matches, how drastically will the landscape change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – MXM Collection VS Spanish Announce Project; wins.
  • Komander VS The Beast Mortos; wins.
  • Texas Deathmatch: Leyla Hirsch VS Diamante; wins.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championship Qualifier: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS The Dark Order; wins and advances to Battle of the Belts 11.
  • ROH World Tag Team Championships: The Kingdom VS Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O’Reilly; win(s) and
  • ROH World Television Championship Survival of the Fittest: Atlantis Jr. VS Lio Rush VS Shane Taylor VS Johnny TV VS Lee Johnson VS Brian Cage; wins and
  • ROH Pure Championship: Wheeler Yuta VS Lee Moriarty; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship: Billie Starkz VS Red Velvet; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Championship: Athena VS Queen Aminata; wins and
  • ROH World Championship: Mark Briscoe VS Roderick Strong; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 7.25.2024

Slammiversary Fallout! Where do things go on the way to Victory Road?

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Well now we start the fall out of Slammiversary. Josh Alexander in his bad bitch summer, X-Speedball legacy, ABC got the t-a-g and Jordynne is still in charge of the Knockouts division. Like I said at the end of Slammiversary, all of the champions being Babyfaces is stupid. They need to drop a couple titles fairly quickly, because I don’t care what some people say, Nic Nemeth ain’t gonna bring any eyes to the brand. He’s about as hot as day old Hamburger Helper over a camping sterno.

We’ll probably open with the luke warm champion, so tune in like 10 minutes late for anything of substance to be happen.

https://x.com/i/status/1816629254349533588

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner: Maclin wins via KIA – *
  • AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan: AJ wins via Down Payment – **
  • Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young): Hammer Your ASH wins via Torture Rack – ** 1/2
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey): Broken Alphabet wins via Twist & Splash – ***

 

Results:

Nemeth gives the ole “I’ll be a fighting champion…blah blah” promo and drops the “any company” line that we’ve already understood what that means. Campaign Singh cuts him off…and I never thought I’d be happy for Campaign Singh to walk out and say anything…ever. And…Mustafa’s promo is worse than Dolph’s. He’s gone from parody to caricature even saying “it was the biggest screw job Montreal ever saw”. Like some of these lines are cheap heat, but most are just brain dead comments that wouldn’t get a reaction out of anyone (and the crowd was silent for that comment). Mustafa gets caught in an Archer “phrasing” moment about getting screwed hard, but this is painful. Promos written by 14 year olds everyone…

This ends with Ali challenging Nemeth for the World Title. While I’m not against walk up challenges, I watch Japanese wrestling, I don’t really get the point aside from doing it just to do it. 

ABC and Matt Hardy have a small promo, and I’m still not really a fan of Unbroken Matt Version 6.0. The floating between Broken voice and his normal voice sounds amateurish.

OH LOOK, finally a match 20 minutes into the show. And it’s my son Steve Maclin! OH CHRIST he’s facing Deaner. This has been 25 minutes of talking followed by the worst god damn attempt at a gimmick. Deaner’s little “Papa Santino told me I can wipe my ass only if the crowd agrees”. This gimmick should die in a fire.

Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner

Deaner started off quick because Maclin was in disbelief that Deaner was actually gonna fight him. Maclin dodges a Crossbody, Busaiku Knee, and just starts beating on Deaner for fun. And this is fun, maybe Maclin can make sure Deaner gets stretchered out and written off forever. How do you call for an ambulance in French? Maclin with the old Back Breaker into a stretch. Deaner tries to nerd rage up, breaks the Back Breaker Stretch, his punch combo, into a Manhattan Drop and Bulldog. Deaner hits the Crossbody, but Maclin kicks out. This is entirely too competitive.

Deaner goes for the Deaner DDT, blocked, Olympic Slam into Splashing Deaner into the corner, Caught in the Crosshairs, K-I-A, thanks for coming you damn dweeb. Stay in Canada and don’t travel Deaner, please.

https://x.com/i/status/1816633784537874761

AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan

As the bell sounds, Sami knocks Rich off the apron, Low Bridges AJ, does the Beats of the Bodhran on AJ and then AJ eats the offense and strategizes with his crew. Bishop and Rich swarm the ring, Sami allows himself to get distracted so AJ slides in and starts beating on Sami. AJ throats Sami across the middle rope and Rich makes his presence felt, AJ distracts the referee and Rich gets in a lot of cheap shots. Bishop throws Sami back in the ring, and AJ keeps up the pressure. Lots of 5 count chokes and leverage moves. After the commercial break ends, Sami dodges a Tennessee Whiskey Knee, gets in a few shots before Rich trips Sami as he’s setting up a Dive, and then AJ takes advantage of the position and hits the goofball knee strike.

AJ calls for his Chokeslam, Sami tries to break it with Axe Handles, then claws the eyes. Sami goes for a Scoop Slam, gets him part way up and then falls over. AJ Chokeslam again, but he bites his hand and starts fighting back. Launches himself at AJ, sends him bouncing off the ropes and uses the momentum to hit that Scoop Slam that was teased earlier. Sami goes for a Western Lariat but eats a Big Boot. AJ does a little Hulk Hogan pose to signal a Leg Drop, but Sami dodges and then connects on a Sliding Lariat. Thumbs Up, Thumbs….interference. Rich distracts the ref, Bishop lays out Sami, AJ connects with the Down Payment.

Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young)

ASH and Jordynne exchange slaps and then Jordynne starts to out muscle ASH. Spinebuster from Jordynne, Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights off, rope run, Sattelite DDT into both tagging out. EY does the Flair corner flop, slides back in between Hammer’s legs, and connects on a Neckbreaker. EY is the quicker of the two, but Hammer finally gets his hands on him and a Release Belly to Belly into a full mount raining of fists, then a near fall. Hammer smashes EY in a corner, Arm Wringer into an Irish Whip across, but EY moves and Hammer tags out to ASH. ASH levels Jordynne, peppers EY with a few shots and pulls him back to their corner and starts some tandem offense with Hammerman. Hammer Guerilla Presses ASH and throws her into EY for a near fall. Hammer looks to aim for either a Powerbomb or Nightmare Pendulum, but EY drops it into a Small Package, pinfall kick out, they both run, Double Lariat spot. The Knockouts get tagged in.

Jordynne is in control early, World’s Strongest Slam into a Vader Bomb. Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights it off and tags out to Hammer. Jordynne and EY do some schoolyard stuff with the old Push while Jordynne is down to trip Hammer. All four get in, ASH gets leveled, EY gets leveled, Hammer and Jordynne have a brief face off, but Hammer throws Jordynne to the apron and ASH connects with a Meteora from the apron. Death Valley Driver from Young on Hammer, ASH stares in shock, EY tells her to get, ASH runs away. EY goes up for his Macho Elbow, and ASH causes him to fall to Hammer’s feet, Torture Rack, and EY submits.

Josh Alexander comes out, with new heel music. And it’s not that bad, definitely better than some other people’s new music. Josh yells at the crowd a bit, says he can’t wait til he’s back in a real Canadian town, like his home of Toronto. Then he drops the mic in lieu of an explanation. The crowd chants him off with the “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey”. 

https://x.com/i/status/1816647373654724937

The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey)

JDC and Hardy start, but JDC quickly tags out to Myers and that doesn’t go well. Hardy grabs a hold of Myers, a few Delete chops, drags him to his corner and they all get in a few shots punctuated with Hardy getting tagged back in and an Elbow into Myers’ extended and worked on left arm. Myers stays isolated, back into the corner, Boot to the gut, Ace tags in and wallops Myers. Ace connects on Double Kicks, into Russian Leg Sweep and his half of Click Click Boom, for a 2 count. Myers finally gets free with a Jaw Breaker and tags out to Eddie. But The System gets no momentum, Ace stifles Eddie’s offense and starts a few quick tags with him and Bey for tandem offense. Moose finally comes down the ramp as Eddie kicked out of yet another pinfall attempt because The System has had nothing going for them. Eddie finally gets some offense since Moose was a big enough distraction.

Eddie thinks they have a spot, so he tags back in JDC, but The ABC stop him cold, tag in Matt Hardy, and Matt walks down JDC, but JDC Low Bridges. Matt is on the outside, so all of The System surrounds Hardy, then Joe Hendry’s music hits! That stops the heel beatdown, and we follow Hendry’s entire entrance. So that proves Hendry is bigger than the 8 other people in this frame. Not really sure if that’s optics you want to push along. Ace and JDC try to remind people there’s wrestling going on, but JDC thumbs the eye to get a little something going. Vertical Suplex for a near fall, tag out for Eddie and Eddie lights up Ace with some of those NOAH Chops. Ace retreats to the ropes and Alisha chokes him with the ropes while the ref is distracted.

Myers gets tagged in, Ace tries to use the crowd energy, Myers stops it at first but then Ace slips a Scoop Slam and tags out to Bey. Hot tag, strike rush, Double Stomp, educated feet, Leap Frog to the corner but Lish climbs on the apron and yells at Bey which stops his rhythm. Myers kicks his feet out and causes Bey to crash. Eddie tags in for a few shots, then to JDC and Slingshot Knees, Wringer Snapmare, Bow and Arrow Submission, and JDC is just doing solid wrestling work right now. Uppercut between the Shoulder Blades as Bey tries to get out, tag to Myers and Bey is still eating offense. Eddie tags in, Bey tries the Sunset Flip, but Eddie tags out before going over, so Myers folds up Bey for a near fall and then tags out to JDC who connects on a Standing Suplex, slams Bey’s face into the corner, Eddie tags in, and Bey finally fights up to his feet, Eddie just flatten Bey’s comeback, tries a Tiger Driver but eats an Enzuigiri for a simultaneous tag. JDC and Hardy come in, JDC tries to exit halfway in, but Hardy is wrecking shop. He disposes of Eddie, Myers slides in but eats a tandem Neckbreaker/DDT from Hardy. Face team does the Delete Corner Face Smashes. Poetry in Motion into a Side Effect into Corkscrew Swanton for only 2 since Myers breaks it up! Everyone throwing hands, referee is distracted, Moose comes in to Spear Hardy, but Hardy dodges and throws him into JDC (I get the call back), Hendry then lays out Moose with the big Lariat. Twist of Fate from Hardy, Splash from Bey, Broken Alphabet wins!

 

Overall Score: 4/10

Ugh, cliche promos, too damn much talking, a competitive squash match with an imbecile as our first “match”, into an overbooked and slow heel match, finally a decent tag match (with the right team going over), into another overbooked match with a “tease” for the mystery backup being more obvious than Jericho’s WWF debut.

Aside from the afore mentioned tag match, The Rascalz promo and The System Promo; this was hard to watch. A lot of cornball promos, Rosemary licks her conspiracy board, storylines got zero traction. Whoopity Doo, Ryan Nemeth got a match next week and we get an undead wedding.

While this was a bad episode, it was bad by at least new standards. We’re not back in the TNA Dark Days again, but this was…a useless show.


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