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Mitchell’s ROH Results & Report! (3/14/24)

ROH is Freshly Squeezed!

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It’s a big time return or whatever!

Right before the AEW World Tag Team Championship Tournament begins, Best Friends’ Orange Cassidy & Trent Beretta return to ROH!

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship Tournament: Billie Starkz VS Diamante; Billie wins and advances.
  • Lee Johnson VS Aaron Solo; Johnson wins.
  • Four Corner Survival: Kiera Hogan VS Lady Frost VS Leyla Hirsch VS Robyn Renegade; Kiera wins.
  • ROH Women’s World Championship Proving Ground: Athena VS Aisha; Athena wins and denies Aisha a title match.
  • Six Man Tag: Top Flight VS The Iron Savages; Top Flight wins.
  • The Workhorsemen VS Nick Comoroto & Jacoby Watts; The Workhorsemen win.
  • Lance Archer w/ Jake “The Snake” Roberts VS Darian Bengston; Archer wins.
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship Tournament Quarterfinals: Abadon VS Mercedes Martinez; Martinez wins and advances.
  • Four Corner Survival: AR Fox VS Jack Cartwheel VS Komander VS Slim J; Komander wins.
  • Orange Cassidy & Trent Beretta w/ Chuck Taylor VS Griff Garrisson & Cole Karter w/ Maria Kanellis; Cassidy & Trent win.

PLAY BY PLAY

ROH Women’s World Television Championship Tournament Quarterfinals: Billie Starkz VS Diamante!

Minion 400,237 and three-quarters said herself that no one is better than Athena, and she’s better than everyone else in the field! Will she continue to be one step behind the Fallen Goddess and one step ahead of the rest? Or will she be crushed by the Cuban Diamond?

The Code of Honor is upheld, the bell rings, and then Billie takes a swing! Diamante ducks, waistlocks and O’Conner Rolls, TWO! Things speed up, Diamante ducks ‘n’ dodges then rolls, but Billie leaps over! Billie sunset flips on the return, ONE! Diamante sits on it, ONE! Billie sunset flips again, ONE and Diamante rains down fists! The ref reprimands, Billie pushes Diamante away, and then she runs up, but into an OVERHEAD- OH, well, it ends up more like a flapjack than Belly2Belly throw but that hurts either way. Diamante runs corner to corner to HYDRAULIC DROPKICK! Cover, TWO!

The fans rally up as Billie stays in this, and she bails out to the apron. Diamante pursues and RAMS Billie into the LED barrier! The fans boo but Diamante flexes as she soaks up the heat. Diamante storms back up on Billie, and whips her hard into railing! Billie clutches her side and Diamante tells Billie to be humble. Diamante CHOPS Billie, Billie sputters, and then Diamante headlocks. Diamante brings Billie along, headlock punches her, then whips her at steel steps! Billie goes up and up to FLYING RANA! Not the cleanest but the fans fire up with Billie all the same! Billie stands, storms after Diamante, and puts her in the ring.

The fans rally behind Billie and she hurries to the apron. But Diamante ROCKS her! Diamante puts Billie in the ropes for a NECKBREAKER HOTSHOT! Diamante dumps Billie into a cover, TWO! Diamante is annoyed but she stomps Billie around. Diamante eggs Billie on, has her in a corner and RAMS into her! Then RAMS her again! Billie CLUBS Diamante but Diamante RAMS in again! The ref counts, Diamante lets off and CHOPS! Diamante then digs her boot in! The ref counts, Diamante lets off at 4, but Billie grits her teeth. The fans rally as Diamante stands Billie up and Billie fires body shots!

Diamante throws Billie down by her hair! The fans boo and the ref reprimands but Diamante soaks it up. Diamante sits Billie up, steps over an arm and has the neck wrench! Diamante adds a cording hold to stretch Billie out. The fans rally as Billie endures, but Diamante CLUBS away on Billie’s chest! Diamante goes back to the neck wrench and even grinds her forearms into Billie’s face. Billie fights up, throws body shots, and then ROCKS Diamante with a forearm! Billie runs, Diamante follows and tilt-o-whirls, into a RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! The fans do cheer that ability, and Diamante runs to PLANKING SPLASH! Cover, TWO!

Diamante argues the count but the ref defends it. Diamante eggs Billie on again, then CLUBS her down. Billie grabs at Diamante but Diamante scuffs her. Billie still rises up, and she ROCKS Diamante with a forearm! Diamante snarls and UPPERCUTS Billie down! Diamante pushes Billie to a cover, TWO! Diamante clamps onto Billie with a facelock, then stands her up. Diamante whips Billie to a corner, runs up, but Billie ELBOWS her away! Then BOOTS her away! Diamante tries again, blocks the boot, but not the REBOUND KICK! Billie hurries to dump Diamante out and builds speed, to DIVE! Direct hit at the ramp!

The fans fire up and Billie keeps moving! Billie builds speed again to DIVE again! Another hit, but Billie wants the hattrick! Billie builds speed and DIVES! Direct hit again and the fans fire up! Billie points to the title belt, then drags Diamante up and puts her in the ring. Billie reels Diamante in, suplexes, GHOSTBUSTER! Cover, TWO?!? Diamante survives but Billie is fuming! The fans rally behind Billie as she goes up a corner. Diamante rise sup first to UPPERCUT! Diamante then drags Billie off the top, but Billie ELBOWS her, sweeps the legs, and mule kicks! Billie goes right back up, but Diamante springs to her feet!

Billie leaps over Diamante, goes to the far corner, and Diamante runs in! Wheelbarrow, but Billie makes it a FACEBUSTER! Billie half nelsons to haul Diamante up, but Diamante throws elbows with the free arm! Billie holds on but Diamante snapmares! Billie BOOTS her for it! Billie then brings Diamante in, suplexes, but Diamante cradle counters! TWO!! Billie stands into an UPPERCUT! Diamante reels Billie in, O’Conner Roll and CHAOS THEORY!! Cover, TWO!! Billie survives and shocks Diamante! The fans are thunderous while Diamante thinks on what to do now. Diamante sits Billie up and ROCKS her with a forearm!

Diamante says this is over! She throws more forearms, then some SLAPS and CHOPS! Diamante then stands Billie up, but Billie powers out of the cravat to LARIAT! The fans fire up and Billie flounders to ropes. Billie crawls back to Diamante as the fans rally. Billie fires a forearm, but Diamante gives it back! They go back and forth, harder and harder! The fans rally behind Billie with every shot, but Diamante ROCKS Billie! Billie ROCKS Diamante! The forearms keep going, they pick up speed, and Billie gets the edge! The fans fire up, but Diamante shoves Billie! Billie rebounds to ROCK Diamante again!

Billie runs, ROCKS Diamante against ropes, then keeps going! But Diamante follows to ROCK Billie! Diamante runs, but Billie ROCKS her! Billie runs, Diamante blows past her and wheelbarrows, for the STUNNER! Then a cravat for SHIRANUI!! Cover, TWO?!?! Billie survives again and Diamante pulls at her hair! The fans are thunderous as Diamante drags Billie back up. Diamante whips, runs up, but Billie BOOTS her! And SPIN HEEL KICKS! The fans fire up as Billie goes up top! SWANTON BOMB!! Cover, TWO?!?! Diamante survives but Billie just drags her into the HALF NELSON CROSSFACE!! Diamante taps, Billie wins!!

Winner: Billie Starkz, by pinfall (advances to the semifinals)

Atlanta fires up as Billie is through to the next round! Will nothing stop her from grabbing the gold and standing beside Athena as her equal?

 

Cole Karter & Griff Garrison speak.

The Diamond in the Rough tells the Ivy League MVP, “This is it. This is the biggest match of our career. Maria set this up for us, and we’re gonna make her proud.” Griff says that’s right. The “Baby Boys” have Maria behind them, so Trent & Orange, this is the biggest match of their careers, so they’re gonna do their best. Maria walks in and says, “Your best? Your best? 23 years old (Cole), 26 years old (Griff). You guys are babies. My Baby Boys! I remember thinking that everyone else owned my career when I was your age. That ROH or the person I was in the ring with, they owned my career.

“But the truth is, you own your careers. Y’know, [Griff] had that match with Adam Copeland, and it was great! It was on Collision and everybody was talking about it, and I was so proud. Until you lost. And because you lost, we haven’t seen the inside of a Collision ring since.” Griff feels bad, but Maria says actions have consequences and they need to understand that. These types of opportunities don’t happen every day. Orange, Trent, they’re jealous of Griff & Karter and what they can accomplish! They are on the path to do great things, and the stolen mask of Serpentico is just the beginning. Maria wants to be proud of her baby boys.

They aren’t gonna disappoint her, right? No, of course not! They’re gonna make her proud, right? Right, absolutely! Then let’s go. Maria leads the way, but will her boys’ best be enough against the Best Friends?

 

ROH Women’s World Championship Proving Ground: Athena VS Aisha!

Standing at 46-0, the Fallen Goddess continues to raise the bar on what it is to be the most dominant champion, male or female, in ROH history! Will she keep on going even towards Supercard of Honor? Or is she going to get caught slipping one of these nights?

The Code of Honor is upheld, the bell rings, and the fans rally for Athena. Athena waves to her minions then circles with Aisha. They step up, then Athena DECKS Aisha! Athena HAMMERS away on Aisha, argues with the ref, and then reels Athena in. Athena suplexes for a GOURD BUSTER! Aisha sits up while Athena cheers herself on. Athena runs up, but Aisha gets around to Gory Especial! Aisha spins and spins, then HIP BUMPS Athena away! Aisha runs corner to corner, and BOOTS Athena down! Aisha then drags Athena up to whip corner to corner, and then HIP ATTACKS her down!

The fans are torn, but Aisha goes up the corner. But Athena SHOVES her down! Athena then runs side to side to baseball slide DROPKICK! Aisha falls right to the floor, but Athena goes out after her. Athena CLUBS away on Aisha, then clinches for a scoop and SWING into the railing! Aisha writhes, Athena drags her up and RAMS her into the LED barrier! The fans rally as Athena stalks Aisha, brings her around, and shoves her into the ring. Athena stalks Aisha, CLUBS her and snapmares, to then KICK her in the back! Athena shouts, “This is MY show!” as she SLAPS Aisha again and again! Aisha crawls but Athena storms up on her.

Athena whips Aisha to a corner, but Aisha stops herself! HIP ATTACK! And then a SPINEBUSTER! High stack, ONE!! Athena shocks Aisha, but Aisha fires herself back up. Aisha hauls Athena up, whips her to a corner, but Athena goes up and up, FLYING CODE BREAKER! Athena runs in at the corner to back body block! She goes side to side and ROCKS Aisha with a forearm! Athena then slips out to the apron, brings Aisha into the ropes, and Athena stands on Aisha’s head! The ref reprimands but Athena STOMPS and STOMPS and STOMPS! Aisha flops down while Athena snarls. Aisha crawls but Athena stalks her.

Aisha stands, Athena runs up and BOOTS her down! Athena isn’t done, she ties Aisha’s legs up in a figure four, then adds a STRETCH PLUM! Aisha endures, taps, Athena wins!

Winner: Athena, by submission (denies Aisha a title opportunity)

The Fallen Goddess adds something new to the arsenal, but then she still follows her usual bad habits. She goes out, sits Aisha against steel steps, and then lines up a shot. Athena runs in to KNEE Aisha into the steel! The ref reprimands but some fans want that “One More Time!” Athena paces, gets more space, and runs in again, for another KNEE!! Athena stands tall with her title but she also gets a mic. “That. That is what you have to offer, Atlanta? This hot garbage is what you have to offer me!?” The fans chant for “A T L! A T L!” and Athena frowns. “ATL isn’t even good enough to wipe my ass.”

Fans boo but Athena says since they forgot who she is, she is the FOREVER ROH Women’s Champion, the Fallen Goddess, the Minion Overlord, the ROH Gatekeeper, the American Joshi, the person that is the inspiration to every women’s division, and the main event of ROH! “Match after match, I come to this ring, I put my heart and soul and defend my championship! I give Suzy from down the street an opportunity, I give Rebecca from down the block opportunities! And what do I get in return!? Nothing. And quite frankly, I am bored! I need more! I deserve more! SHUT UP, I’M TALKING!”

Fans boo but Athena says she needs more than “these porcelain princesses, this hot trash!” SHE is the one who has put ROH on the map, put it on her back, and carried it to new levels! And the funny thing is, Supercard is only weeks away! But no one is lining up to face the Forever Champion. Hell, the entire locker room is so afraid of facing Athena, that they lined up for a second-place title tournament! And even then, Nyla Rose, a former AEW Women’s World Champion, after Athena threw her through tables, she could’ve stepped back up. But no, she stepped right out of ROH, tucked tail and ran.

The fans are torn between boos and another “ATL!” chant, but Athena says here we are. She is dying for competition! She needs it to solidify the most epic reign in all of pro-wrestling! Who is it gonna be? Hell, it isn’t anyone in ROH! So she will open every door around the world, anyone is welcome to step inside, because she NEEDS someone to take her to her limit! Athena NEEDS real competition! So who is it gonna be to take her the limit? Wait, that music… HIKARU SHIDA!! The Full Metal Warrior, the former THREE-TIME AEW Women’s World Champion, on top of other titles back home in Japan, is now in ROH!

Shida steps right into the ring with the fans cheering her on. Shida points her kendo stick at Athena and the title, so the challenge is clearly made. Athena holds up the belt, and Tony Khan already sends word that this is happening! Supercard of Honor, April 5th, Philadelphia! Will the Fallen Goddess soon learn that nothing lasts forever?

 

Backstage interview with Lee Johnson.

Lexi Nair congratulates Big Shotty over his big win over Aaron Solo, adding to his 2024 win streak. What is the secret to this success? Johnson says he has said it before and he’ll proudly say it again, he is not just here to take part. He is here to take over! 2024 has been looking really, really good, and he does not plan on slowing down any time soon. So welcome to the Shotty Show! Johnson is ready to stand at the very top of ROH, but what title will he take aim at first?

 

Backstage interview with Taya Valkyrie.

Lexi is with La Wera Loca and says it’s been a couple weeks since they’ve talked. But Lexi does have to ask, what’s it like being a “Boy Mom in Slam Town?” Oh, they’re just so cute! She wants to but the Tate Twins matching outfits and dress them up, they’re so adorable! But then Dalton Castle shouts as he clings to a wall. Taya says he is embarrassing himself, he should leave. Castle asks where Taya’s keeping The Boys but she says she’s not telling them, they’re hers! Castle knows they’re here, he can smell them! Castle goes looking through some sort of hamper…? Taya asks Castle if he really knows The Boys. What’s their favorite animal? What’s they’re favorite color?

SPOILERS! It’s sharks, and blue! Taya keeps quizzing Castle with “Who’re their best friend?” Mommy Taya, that’s who! And what do they like for brunch? SCONES! He knows that! NO, it’s tater tots! And lots of ’em! They even like sashimi, they get it when she gets a California Roll. Castle isn’t even fit to have Boys! Castle laughs as he asks what. He’s not fit. Not fit? No, he is not fit to have Boys! “Look at me, you filth! Tell me where they are!” Taya calls security as Castle gets in her face! Security storms in, they carry Castle away and Taya says she will tell Castle where The Boys are! They’re with Daddy TV, on top of a mountain, learning how to be MEN! And how to be TV READY!

Lexi is almost in tears watching this drama unfold. Taya composes herself and asks if there are other questions. No, we’re good… Will The Peacock ever have his life back in order? Or will Mr. & Mrs. Taya continue to rub his Boys in his face?

 

ROH Women’s World Television Championship Tournament Quarterfinals: Abadon VS Mercedes Martinez!

The round of eight is almost over, and soon we will be left with the Final Four! The Living Dead Girl collides with the OG Badass, but who moves on to face Billie Starkz in the semifinals?

Martinez spits on her hand and the Code of Honor is upheld, then the bell rings. Abadon HEADBUTTS Martinez, then fires off forearms! Abadon whips Martinez to a corner, SPLASHES then fires off clotheslines! Abadon sits Martinez down tot hen STOMP her down! Abadon runs corner to corner to METEORA! Martinez flops out of the ring, Abadon CANNONBALLS her to the floor! The fans fire up and Abadon stalks Martinez. Abadon CLUBS Martinez, stalks her around the way, and then CLUBS her again! The fans rally behind Abadon, but Martinez BOOTS Abadon down! Martinez says the fans are sure quiet now!

Martinez refreshes the ring count, CLUBS Abadon, then pushes Abadon in the ring. Martinez talks trash then KICKS Abadon in the side. Martinez gets Abadon up, BUTTERFUL SUPLEX and a roll through, for another BUTTERFLY SUPLEX! Martinez drags Abadon up again, and then lifts her up for a BUTTERFLY STRETCH! Abadon endures, so Martinez SLAMS Abadon down! Cover, TWO! Martinez paces around Abadon, talks trash and slaps her around, and the fans rally. Martinez UPPERCUTS Abadon, whips her to ropes, but Abadon holds ropes while laughing!

Abadon ELBOWS Martinez, runs and tilt-o-whirls to RANA! Martinez gets up, wrenches, but Abadon ducks a lariat, but Martinez turns around to LARIAT after all! Cover, TWO! The fans rally as Abadon stays in this. Martinez drags Abadon up, steps over, and has a seated cobra twist! Abadon endures and the fans rally again. Abadon fights around, throws some elbows and shots from below, and then stands up. But Martinez UPPERCUTS her down! Martinez drags Abadon up, fireman’s carries, but Abadon fights free! Abadon BOOTS Martinez, runs up, but Martinez DECKS her! Martinez then lines up a shot, but is creeped out by Abadon laughing and singing as she sits up!

Martinez runs in, Abadon blocks a boot and trips her! Abadon runs to BASEMENT CODE BREAKER! Cover, TWO! Martinez is still in this but Abadon snarls. Abadon stalks Martinez to ropes, KNEES her low, then KNEES her again and again! The ref counts, Abadon lets off and whips, but Martinez reverses. Martinez gets around to SAIDO! The fans rally, Martinez takes aim, and runs in at the corner, to FOREARM SMASH! Martinez sits Abadon down, goes side to side, and BOOT WASHES! The fans fire up and Martinez YANKS Abadon for a SLAM, then high stacks! TWO, but Martinez gets a leg! Martinez sits on a HALF CRAB!

Abadon endures, crawls, reaches out, and the fans rally up again. Abadon drags Martinez back to get the ROPEBREAK! Martinez lets go in frustration and she runs corner to corner again. Abadon dodges, Martinez runs into buckles, and Abadon throws Martinez back. Abadon goes up to then reel Martinez in for a RANA! And a CUTTER! But Martinez flounders to the apron! Abadon crawls after Martinez, grabs at her, and then goes out to the apron with her. Abadon CLUBS away on Martinez, reels her in, APRON- NO, Martinez holds ropes to deny the DDT! Abadon sits up in a daze, and Martinez KNEES her right back down!

Martinez huffs and puffs, drags Abadon out along the apron, and KICKS, KICKS and KICKS Abadon in the back! Martinez then drapes Abadon out for the SWINGING NECKBREAKER to the floor! The fans fire up and the ring count starts. Abadon stirs at 5 of 10, claws at the floor mat, but Martinez is up first. Martinez puts Abadon in at 8 of 20, covers, TWO! Abadon survives and Martinez is frustrated. Martinez hears the fans rallying for Abadon but says she’s the one moving on! Martinez hauls Abadon up, but Abadon is deadweight! Martinez kicks Abadon around, drags Abadon back up, but Abadon SHRIEKS!

Abadon BITES Martinez’s arm! The fans fire up, the ref counts, and Abadon lets off at 4. Abadon “apologizes” then gets around Martinez, SWING-OUT DDT!! Cover, TWO!! Abadon can’t believe it and shrieks into the night! The fans fire up as Martinez crawls to a corner. Abadon rises, runs in at the corner, but Martinez dodges! Abadon ELBOWS back, hobbles along ropes, but wait is that Diamante!? Diamante CLUBS Abadon on the back, Martinez reels Abadon in, FISHERMAN BUSTER!! Cover, Martinez wins?!?

Winner: Mercedes Martinez, by pinfall 

The fans boo because Abadon just got cheated! Martinez will face Billie in the next round, but will Diamante be her insurance policy even then? Is Abadon gonna haunt them until the end of time for this?

 

Eddie Kingston speaks.

“ROH has Supercard coming up. In the birthplace of ROH, in Philly. And there was someone almost about a year ago, very close to a year ago, who was supposed to have a title shot at Claudio but got injured, and never got his title shot. And that’s you, Mark. That’s you, Chicken, Mark Briscoe baby.” Eddie tells Mark that, as Mark knows, Mark wasn’t even allowed on the first ROH show because he was only 17! But he was there with his brother, Jay Briscoe, for Jay Briscoe VS Amazing Red. So why not now? It’s beautiful. It’s only two, three hours from home? Bring all your people, Mark. Not in a “I’m gonna beat you up” way, not like how Edde is going to scar Kazuchika Okada.

No, Eddie and Mark are going to show what the beautiful art of professional wrestling is. They won’t play around, they won’t dance. They will fight. They will fight for THE ROH World Championship, in Philadelphia, where this all started. Because Eddie respects Mark. And who cares who doesn’t like what Eddie’s about to say, they can talk to him about that. But Mark has been earning this shot for years, he deserves this shot, and Eddie wants to be the man who gives Mark that shot. It is happening, but will The Mad King make it through the Rainmaker with all the gold on his shoulders?

 

Orange Cassidy & Trent Beretta w/ Chuck Taylor VS Griff Garrisson & Cole Karter w/ Maria Kanellis!

The Freshly Squeezed combination for Best Friends is getting in the AEW World Tag Team Championship tournament, and they already won against the Superbad Squad. Will they keep things going against Maria’s Baby Boys? Or will the First Lady of Professional Wrestling be the proudest she’s ever been after tonight?

The Code of Honor is upheld by all four men, and Trent even shakes Maria’s hand. The fans chant for “Freshly Squeezed!” as the teams sort out, and Cassidy starts against Karter. Cassidy and Karter circle, the fans even chant for “Chuckie T! Chuckie T!” then for “Trent! Trent! Trent!” Cassidy raises his hands, but Karter rushes in! Cassidy gets around to headlock, but Karter powers up and out. Karter drops, hurdles, then arm-drags! But Cassidy arm-drags back! Then Cassidy avoids Karter’s arm-drag, and he has his hands up! Maria freaks out, Karter runs up, but Cassidy hurdles then MONKEY FLIPS Karter!

Cassidy kips up, keeps Karter from Griff, then bumps him off buckles. Tag to Trent and Trent whips Cassidy so Cassidy can whip Trent, and Trent ROCKS Karter! Trent feeds Karter to Cassidy, just so Cassidy can hold Karter up. Trent runs to CLOBBER Karter, then Cassidy SPLASHES down! Trent moves Cassidy aside so he can cover Karter, TWO! Karter scrambles away as Maria coaches him, and Karter tags Griff. Griff runs up but into a hip toss! Trent KICKS Griff in the back, kicks low then CHOPS him! Tag to Cassidy, he and Trent double whip Griff to double shoulder tackle! They shake hands, then sit Griff up to reel him in!

Trent & Cassidy double suplex high and hard! Maria protests, Cassidy covers, TWO! Griff stays in this and Cassidy discusses the count as opposed to arguing. The count was fair so Cassidy goes to Griff in a corner. Griff turns things around to then throw body shots and an UPPERCUT! Griff whips Cassidy corner to corner, but Cassidy tumbles up and out. Cassidy ducks the haymaker to dribble Griff off buckles! The fans count along and Cassidy goes all the way to TEN! Maria is upset and she gets up on the apron! Trent protests, the ref is busy with them all, and Griff BOOTS Cassidy down! Karter shoves Cassidy back in, Griff SPLASHES in a corner!

Griff snapmares to a cover, TWO! Griff stays on Cassidy with a facelock and grinds him down. Griff drags Cassidy over, tags Karter, and they mug Cassidy. Maria cheers as Karter rains down fists! The fans boo, the ref reprimands about closed fists, so Karter lets off. Karter snap suplexes, covers, TWO! Cassidy is frustrated but Karter knees him in the back! And again! Karter drags Cassidy up, bumps him off buckles, then tags Griff. Karter bumps Cassidy off buckles, Griff ROCKS Cassidy in the back! Griff brings Cassidy around, CLUBS him down, but the fans rally up. Griff brings Cassidy back for Karter to tag in.

Griff sends Karter in but Cassidy BOOTS! Maria freaks out as Cassidy dodges Griff’s splash! Karter grabs a leg but Cassidy BOOTS him away! Griff gets a leg, Cassidy BOOTS Griff away! Griff AND Karter get legs! They drag Cassidy back but he BOOTS them both away! Hot tag to Trent! Trent rallies on Griff & Karter with LARIAT after LARIAT! Trent drops down to then STANDING METEORA Karter! Griff swings, but into a GERMAN SUPLEX! Trent holds on to GERMAN SUPLEX again! Trent drags Griff up again, but Karter runs in. Trent shoves Griff away, gets around Karter, and he GERMAN SUPLEXES Karter!

The fans fire up and Trent aims at Griff on the outside. PLANCHA! Direct hit and down goes Griff! The fans fire up but Maria gets between Trent and Chuck! She denies the people what they want, and Karter CLOBBERS Trent! Fans boo but Karter gives Trent an APRON BACK SUPLEX! Karter soaks up the heat, pushes Trent into the ring, and Griff joins in. Karter fireman’s carries, Griff runs up, BOOT O’ DOOM! Karter hurries to cover, TWO!! Trent survives but Karter rains down fists! The ref reprimands again but Karter drags Trent up. Karter bumps Trent off buckles then tags in Griff. Griff rains down forearms!

Griff huffs ‘n’ puffs as he lets off, but the fans rally up for Trent. Griff drags Trent up, tags Karter, and Karter runs to CLOBBER Cassidy! Griff feeds Trent to Karter’s KNEE, then hits an atomic FACEBUSTER! Cover, Cassidy breaks it! Tag to Karter and he TOSSES Cassidy! Griff hauls Trent up, Karter climbs. Griff scoop SLAMS Trent, Karter 450 FLOPS as Trent moves!! The fans fire up as Trent crawls, but Griff hurries in to anchor him! Trent slips around to SAIDO Griff away! The fans fire up again as Trent staggers up and around, hot tag to Cassidy! Cassidy “storms” up to Griff & Karter, and “unleashes” those kicks!

Cassidy then stomps and stomps and stomps and stomps! The fans fire up, Cassidy runs, and he DOUBLE SHOTGUNS! Cassidy kips up, the fans fire up, and Cassidy powers up his arm! Cassidy runs in but Griff puts him on the apron! Cassidy ROCKS Griff, goes up, and CROSSBODIES! Cassidy keeps moving, he ducks ‘n’ dodges Karter to tilt-o-whirl and DDT! Cover, TWO!! Karter survives and Cassidy grits his teeth. Chuckie T and the fans rally up, and off comes the elbow pad! Cassidy aims, but Maria trips him up! The fans boo, Griff runs in, ROLLING ELBOW! Trent is back and he SUPERKICKS Griff!

Karter CALF KICKS Trent! Karter dodges the Orange Punch to DROPKICK! Karter soaks up the heat as he drags Cassidy back up. Maria applauds as Karter suplexes, but into STUN DOG MILLIONAIRE, that sends him into a HALF ‘N’ HALF from Trent! Cassidy DIVES onto Griff! Trent aims at Karter, but Maria distracts! She wants a hug?! The fans boo but Trent figures why not. Trent hugs Chuck! You GOT to give the people what they want! Trent reels Karter in for the PILEDRIVER!! Then feed to the ORANGE PUNCH!! Cassidy covers, Best Friends win!

Winners: Orange Cassidy & Trent Beretta, by pinfall

The biggest match of the Baby Boys’ career, and they fell hard! Best Friends will have to turn things right around because they’re going on a Rampage, will they keep the momentum going towards AEW’s own March Madness?

Wait! Spanish Annoucne Project sneaks in! They fire off hands on Griff & Karter! Maria panics, but she taunts Serpentico with the mask! She throws it down, he thinks about it, and so he grabs the mask! But Griff rises up! Griff turns Serpentico around, only to get punches from the mask hand! But Maria LOW BLOWS Serpentico! Karter LOW BLOWS Angelico! Maria shouts the mask is HERS, but then Best Friends return! They chase Maria off but she still has Serpentico’s property! When and where will #SNAKEMAN have his revenge? But for now, Best Friends stand with SAP, and they all HUG~! You definitely GOT to give the people what they want!


My Thoughts:

Another week of ROH needing to figure out its runtimes. The stream said 49 minutes, there were apparently technical difficulties and delays, and even then it ended up being a two hour episode instead. In many ways, this is just ROH reverting into AEW Dark. We still got good stuff, and as I skimmed through things, it seems there are some stories developing. Jacoby Watts has already been a parody of Christian evangelists that become self-important, and I do appreciate Caprice Coleman on commentary not being a fan of that given his own “man of the cloth” character. Jacoby is trying to lead Nick Comoroto to success but obviously in a misguided way, that might end up a good story to help Comoroto finally get something going again.

I did like in the Six Man Tag of Top Flight VS Iron Savages that they started with a “chug off,” and of course Action Andretti took that with his impressive speed chug technique. Archer of course dominated Bengston but fans had fun seeing Jake The Snake get a shot in first, and both Four Corner Survival matches were fast and fun. Great wins for Kiera Hogan and Komander through those, but Keira’s gonna be waiting on the Women’s TV title tournament to wrap up before she gets a title match, and Komander probably isn’t ever adding another title while he’s still AAA Cruiserweight Champion.

Really good match from Johnson and Solo because, as commentary made sure to note, they came up together through the Nightmare Factory and they know each other very well. Johnson’s win makes him 7-1 but that’s seven straight and really does deserve some kind of title match. It just doesn’t seem like that’ll happen until the other side of Supercard. Eddie had a great promo to officially establish an ROH World title match with Mark Briscoe, and Ethan Page is still waiting on Tony Khan to get Kyle Fletcher over here for an ROH World TV Championship match. Wheeler Yuta may still be recovering from minor injury, but it would be nice if the Pure Championship was back in action.

Athena of course won the Proving Ground match, but great promo from her to throw out an Open Challenge. And great choice for it to be Hikaru Shida, that will be an awesome match for Supercard. Now, as great as Athena beating Shida would be, part of her promo made me think that her time as champion has to be closer to the end. Athena can give the belt to Shida, making Shida a history-maker but then Athena can move on to AEW to get in on a title scene there. Even with Mercedes Mone now joining AEW, Shida in ROH and Athena in AEW freshens everything up to help both divisions move forward in to Spring and Summer.

Great stuff in the ROH Women’s TV Championship tournament. Billie of course won her match, she’s one of the main focuses in this tournament’s story. But then quite the surprise in Diamante helping Martinez screw Abadon over. At the same time, we weren’t getting Abadon VS Billie anyway, two fan favorites clashing and one has to win, that would be too hard of a call for anyone. Billie will surely beat Martinez, maybe with Abadon helping as revenge on Martinez, and then Billie is a finalist going to Supercard of Honor.

That promo segment from Taya and Cassidy was hilarious. It was a rather well-done take on a dramatic family situation, and I’m sure the next promo will be the debut of The TV Boys, where Brandon & Brent are “TV Ready.” And good stuff going into the main event. Good promo from Griff, Karter & Maria, really good match with Best Friends, but of course Best Friends won. I’m almost a little disappointed SAP didn’t get Serpentico’s mask back, but that again is a better moment to happen in like a “Mask on a Pole” match or a ladder match where the mask is hanging above the ring. That’s not a Supercard of Honor level match, but it can be a solid main event on the go-home episode in a few weeks.

My Score: 8.6/10


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Mitchell’s ROH Death Before Dishonor Results & Report! (7/26/24)

YEEHAW!

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The word of the day is, “Gold!”

ROH brings Death Before Dishonor to Texas, and makes it bigger than ever! SIX championship matches, how drastically will the landscape change?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Zero Hour – MXM Collection VS Spanish Announce Project; wins.
  • Komander VS The Beast Mortos; wins.
  • Texas Deathmatch: Leyla Hirsch VS Diamante; wins.
  • ROH World Six Man Tag Team Championship Qualifier: Dustin Rhodes & The Von Erichs VS The Dark Order; wins and advances to Battle of the Belts 11.
  • ROH World Tag Team Championships: The Kingdom VS Tomohiro Ishii & Kyle O’Reilly; win(s) and
  • ROH World Television Championship Survival of the Fittest: Atlantis Jr. VS Lio Rush VS Shane Taylor VS Johnny TV VS Lee Johnson VS Brian Cage; wins and
  • ROH Pure Championship: Wheeler Yuta VS Lee Moriarty; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Television Championship: Billie Starkz VS Red Velvet; wins and
  • ROH Women’s World Championship: Athena VS Queen Aminata; wins and
  • ROH World Championship: Mark Briscoe VS Roderick Strong; wins and

PLAY BY PLAY

[Due to scheduling conflicts, coverage will be on delay]


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 7.25.2024

Slammiversary Fallout! Where do things go on the way to Victory Road?

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Well now we start the fall out of Slammiversary. Josh Alexander in his bad bitch summer, X-Speedball legacy, ABC got the t-a-g and Jordynne is still in charge of the Knockouts division. Like I said at the end of Slammiversary, all of the champions being Babyfaces is stupid. They need to drop a couple titles fairly quickly, because I don’t care what some people say, Nic Nemeth ain’t gonna bring any eyes to the brand. He’s about as hot as day old Hamburger Helper over a camping sterno.

We’ll probably open with the luke warm champion, so tune in like 10 minutes late for anything of substance to be happen.

https://x.com/i/status/1816629254349533588

Ratings:

  • Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner: Maclin wins via KIA – *
  • AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan: AJ wins via Down Payment – **
  • Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young): Hammer Your ASH wins via Torture Rack – ** 1/2
  • The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey): Broken Alphabet wins via Twist & Splash – ***

 

Results:

Nemeth gives the ole “I’ll be a fighting champion…blah blah” promo and drops the “any company” line that we’ve already understood what that means. Campaign Singh cuts him off…and I never thought I’d be happy for Campaign Singh to walk out and say anything…ever. And…Mustafa’s promo is worse than Dolph’s. He’s gone from parody to caricature even saying “it was the biggest screw job Montreal ever saw”. Like some of these lines are cheap heat, but most are just brain dead comments that wouldn’t get a reaction out of anyone (and the crowd was silent for that comment). Mustafa gets caught in an Archer “phrasing” moment about getting screwed hard, but this is painful. Promos written by 14 year olds everyone…

This ends with Ali challenging Nemeth for the World Title. While I’m not against walk up challenges, I watch Japanese wrestling, I don’t really get the point aside from doing it just to do it. 

ABC and Matt Hardy have a small promo, and I’m still not really a fan of Unbroken Matt Version 6.0. The floating between Broken voice and his normal voice sounds amateurish.

OH LOOK, finally a match 20 minutes into the show. And it’s my son Steve Maclin! OH CHRIST he’s facing Deaner. This has been 25 minutes of talking followed by the worst god damn attempt at a gimmick. Deaner’s little “Papa Santino told me I can wipe my ass only if the crowd agrees”. This gimmick should die in a fire.

Steve Maclin vs Cody Deaner

Deaner started off quick because Maclin was in disbelief that Deaner was actually gonna fight him. Maclin dodges a Crossbody, Busaiku Knee, and just starts beating on Deaner for fun. And this is fun, maybe Maclin can make sure Deaner gets stretchered out and written off forever. How do you call for an ambulance in French? Maclin with the old Back Breaker into a stretch. Deaner tries to nerd rage up, breaks the Back Breaker Stretch, his punch combo, into a Manhattan Drop and Bulldog. Deaner hits the Crossbody, but Maclin kicks out. This is entirely too competitive.

Deaner goes for the Deaner DDT, blocked, Olympic Slam into Splashing Deaner into the corner, Caught in the Crosshairs, K-I-A, thanks for coming you damn dweeb. Stay in Canada and don’t travel Deaner, please.

https://x.com/i/status/1816633784537874761

AJ Francis w/Rich Swann & Josh Bishop vs Sami Callihan

As the bell sounds, Sami knocks Rich off the apron, Low Bridges AJ, does the Beats of the Bodhran on AJ and then AJ eats the offense and strategizes with his crew. Bishop and Rich swarm the ring, Sami allows himself to get distracted so AJ slides in and starts beating on Sami. AJ throats Sami across the middle rope and Rich makes his presence felt, AJ distracts the referee and Rich gets in a lot of cheap shots. Bishop throws Sami back in the ring, and AJ keeps up the pressure. Lots of 5 count chokes and leverage moves. After the commercial break ends, Sami dodges a Tennessee Whiskey Knee, gets in a few shots before Rich trips Sami as he’s setting up a Dive, and then AJ takes advantage of the position and hits the goofball knee strike.

AJ calls for his Chokeslam, Sami tries to break it with Axe Handles, then claws the eyes. Sami goes for a Scoop Slam, gets him part way up and then falls over. AJ Chokeslam again, but he bites his hand and starts fighting back. Launches himself at AJ, sends him bouncing off the ropes and uses the momentum to hit that Scoop Slam that was teased earlier. Sami goes for a Western Lariat but eats a Big Boot. AJ does a little Hulk Hogan pose to signal a Leg Drop, but Sami dodges and then connects on a Sliding Lariat. Thumbs Up, Thumbs….interference. Rich distracts the ref, Bishop lays out Sami, AJ connects with the Down Payment.

Hammer Your ASH (ASH by Elegance & Alexander Hammerstone) vs JuggerYoung (Jordynne Grace & Eric Young)

ASH and Jordynne exchange slaps and then Jordynne starts to out muscle ASH. Spinebuster from Jordynne, Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights off, rope run, Sattelite DDT into both tagging out. EY does the Flair corner flop, slides back in between Hammer’s legs, and connects on a Neckbreaker. EY is the quicker of the two, but Hammer finally gets his hands on him and a Release Belly to Belly into a full mount raining of fists, then a near fall. Hammer smashes EY in a corner, Arm Wringer into an Irish Whip across, but EY moves and Hammer tags out to ASH. ASH levels Jordynne, peppers EY with a few shots and pulls him back to their corner and starts some tandem offense with Hammerman. Hammer Guerilla Presses ASH and throws her into EY for a near fall. Hammer looks to aim for either a Powerbomb or Nightmare Pendulum, but EY drops it into a Small Package, pinfall kick out, they both run, Double Lariat spot. The Knockouts get tagged in.

Jordynne is in control early, World’s Strongest Slam into a Vader Bomb. Juggernaut Driver attempt, but ASH fights it off and tags out to Hammer. Jordynne and EY do some schoolyard stuff with the old Push while Jordynne is down to trip Hammer. All four get in, ASH gets leveled, EY gets leveled, Hammer and Jordynne have a brief face off, but Hammer throws Jordynne to the apron and ASH connects with a Meteora from the apron. Death Valley Driver from Young on Hammer, ASH stares in shock, EY tells her to get, ASH runs away. EY goes up for his Macho Elbow, and ASH causes him to fall to Hammer’s feet, Torture Rack, and EY submits.

Josh Alexander comes out, with new heel music. And it’s not that bad, definitely better than some other people’s new music. Josh yells at the crowd a bit, says he can’t wait til he’s back in a real Canadian town, like his home of Toronto. Then he drops the mic in lieu of an explanation. The crowd chants him off with the “Nah Nah Nah Nah, Hey Hey Hey”. 

https://x.com/i/status/1816647373654724937

The System (Eddie Edwards, Brian Myers & JDC) w/Alisha Edwards vs Matt Hardy & The ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey)

JDC and Hardy start, but JDC quickly tags out to Myers and that doesn’t go well. Hardy grabs a hold of Myers, a few Delete chops, drags him to his corner and they all get in a few shots punctuated with Hardy getting tagged back in and an Elbow into Myers’ extended and worked on left arm. Myers stays isolated, back into the corner, Boot to the gut, Ace tags in and wallops Myers. Ace connects on Double Kicks, into Russian Leg Sweep and his half of Click Click Boom, for a 2 count. Myers finally gets free with a Jaw Breaker and tags out to Eddie. But The System gets no momentum, Ace stifles Eddie’s offense and starts a few quick tags with him and Bey for tandem offense. Moose finally comes down the ramp as Eddie kicked out of yet another pinfall attempt because The System has had nothing going for them. Eddie finally gets some offense since Moose was a big enough distraction.

Eddie thinks they have a spot, so he tags back in JDC, but The ABC stop him cold, tag in Matt Hardy, and Matt walks down JDC, but JDC Low Bridges. Matt is on the outside, so all of The System surrounds Hardy, then Joe Hendry’s music hits! That stops the heel beatdown, and we follow Hendry’s entire entrance. So that proves Hendry is bigger than the 8 other people in this frame. Not really sure if that’s optics you want to push along. Ace and JDC try to remind people there’s wrestling going on, but JDC thumbs the eye to get a little something going. Vertical Suplex for a near fall, tag out for Eddie and Eddie lights up Ace with some of those NOAH Chops. Ace retreats to the ropes and Alisha chokes him with the ropes while the ref is distracted.

Myers gets tagged in, Ace tries to use the crowd energy, Myers stops it at first but then Ace slips a Scoop Slam and tags out to Bey. Hot tag, strike rush, Double Stomp, educated feet, Leap Frog to the corner but Lish climbs on the apron and yells at Bey which stops his rhythm. Myers kicks his feet out and causes Bey to crash. Eddie tags in for a few shots, then to JDC and Slingshot Knees, Wringer Snapmare, Bow and Arrow Submission, and JDC is just doing solid wrestling work right now. Uppercut between the Shoulder Blades as Bey tries to get out, tag to Myers and Bey is still eating offense. Eddie tags in, Bey tries the Sunset Flip, but Eddie tags out before going over, so Myers folds up Bey for a near fall and then tags out to JDC who connects on a Standing Suplex, slams Bey’s face into the corner, Eddie tags in, and Bey finally fights up to his feet, Eddie just flatten Bey’s comeback, tries a Tiger Driver but eats an Enzuigiri for a simultaneous tag. JDC and Hardy come in, JDC tries to exit halfway in, but Hardy is wrecking shop. He disposes of Eddie, Myers slides in but eats a tandem Neckbreaker/DDT from Hardy. Face team does the Delete Corner Face Smashes. Poetry in Motion into a Side Effect into Corkscrew Swanton for only 2 since Myers breaks it up! Everyone throwing hands, referee is distracted, Moose comes in to Spear Hardy, but Hardy dodges and throws him into JDC (I get the call back), Hendry then lays out Moose with the big Lariat. Twist of Fate from Hardy, Splash from Bey, Broken Alphabet wins!

 

Overall Score: 4/10

Ugh, cliche promos, too damn much talking, a competitive squash match with an imbecile as our first “match”, into an overbooked and slow heel match, finally a decent tag match (with the right team going over), into another overbooked match with a “tease” for the mystery backup being more obvious than Jericho’s WWF debut.

Aside from the afore mentioned tag match, The Rascalz promo and The System Promo; this was hard to watch. A lot of cornball promos, Rosemary licks her conspiracy board, storylines got zero traction. Whoopity Doo, Ryan Nemeth got a match next week and we get an undead wedding.

While this was a bad episode, it was bad by at least new standards. We’re not back in the TNA Dark Days again, but this was…a useless show.


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