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Mitchell’s WWE NXT Report! (3/28/18)

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All images courtesy of the WWE Network streaming service

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic Semifinals match: The Street Profits VS The Authors of Pain w/ Paul Ellering; The AoP win and advance to the finals.
  • Lars Sullivan VS John Silver; Sullivan wins.
  • Dakota Kai VS ???; no contest.
  • Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic Semifinals match: SAnitY VS Roderick Strong & Pete Dunne; Strong & Dunne win and advance to the finals.

PLAY BY PLAY

Before the show, Tommaso Ciampa arrived at Full Sail.

The Psycho Killer saw the fans, and the fans saw him. The fans boo and jeer like always, while NXT Media ask Ciampa about his recovering knee. Ciampa refuses to answer, but asks William Regal, “What type of place are you running here?” Johnny Gargano shows up at Ciampa’s place of work and attacks him! Gargano has been stalking Ciampa! Ciampa blames Regal.

Regal admits, Gargano is out of order. Ciampa wants to know what to do to get rid of Gargano for good. TakeOver: New Orleans, Ciampa VS Gargano, but it’ll be unsanctioned. Regal knows as well as Ciampa, what “unsanctioned” means. Yes, Regal does. But if Gargano wins, he’s got his job back! Though, if Ciampa wins, Gargano will be banished from Full Sail and NXT for good. NXT Media ask Ciampa his thoughts, but it’s clear from the look on his face what he’s ready to do to Gargano. Will Gargano win back his job? Or will Ciampa crush his former friend under the weight of his grudge once and for all?

 

NXT General Manager, William Regal, heads to the ring.

He welcomes the crowd to another night of NXT, and says that “week in and week out”, NXT brings us the “very best competitors from aruond the world.” Therefore, there need to be measuring sticks to assess the talent. That is to say, at TakeOver: New Orleans, there shall be a match for the NXT North American Championship. Just as the WWE United Kingdom Championship has brought us Wolfgang, Tyler Bate, Trent Seven, Mark Andrews and Pete Dunne, this NAC will be carried with pride. But wait, who is this coming out now?

It’s Ethan Carter III! Mr. Top 1%, EC3 himself, is here in NXT, and Full Sail is fired up as he enters the ring. EC3 takes a mic and decides to “bask in this moment because I deserve it.” This is too much. He knew Regal was a kind man when he recruited him to the hottest brand in sports entertainment, and knew Regal was reasonable man to roll out a red carpet and lucrative contract. Not to mention the great theme song. But who knew Regal was so logical to create a new title just for EC3! The fans chant “N X 3” because that’s what it is now with him around. There is only one man capable of representing the greatest region in the world, and that is the best guy here, there and anywhere, and that man IS EC3. Maybe Regal went too far but-

Regal speaks up, and is himself very happy to see EC3 finally join, but no one is handed anything in NXT. EC3 will have to earn the title, and he’s more than capable. Therefore, TakeOver: New Orleans will have EC3 competing for the NXT NAC, against five other men, in a Ladder Match! The fans like that, but EC3 doesn’t look so sure. Fans chant “Thank you, Regal!”, and EC3 joins in. “Because you can line up five men, 10 men, 15 men”, or even the entire NXT locker room, but EC3 still vows to show the world why he is the Top 1% of the industry. Regal and EC3 shake hands, and the fans cheer, but who will join EC3 in a Six Man Ladder Match for the brand new title?

 

Charly Caruso recaps the Dusty Tag Team Classic.

Mustache Mountain was unable to compete as Tyler Bate’s leg injury would not be healed in time. This gave rise to a new team to take on Lorcan & Burch as Roderick Strong would get the British Bruiserweight to join in him battle! Strong & Dunne would get past the one-two brawling combination of Lorcan & Burch, but can this team still keep going against the chaotic combination of SAnitY?

 

Performance center interview with TM61.

Nick Miller & Shane Thorne speak on their loss in this year’s Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic. They were hoping their big comeback would be better than it turned out, but they can’t get one over. Maybe they need to change strategies, go to the drawing board, but more importantly, they need to change attitude. The Mighty Don’t Kneel, but-

Wait, something is going on in the background between Shayan Baszler and a trainee. And now Ember Moon comes over? Cameras move to see and hear what’s going on. Ember shoves Shayna, and now it’s a brawl! They bump into the camera man as they spill over! Other NXT trainees and superstars have to separate them. Tensions are running high just 11 days from TakeOver, will either woman keep from burning Full Sail down to the ground before then?

 

Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic Semifinals match: The Street Profits VS The Authors of Pain w/ Paul Ellering!

Angelo Dawkins & Montez Ford have the #CurseofGreatness and it’s brought them this far, but Akam & Rezar, who write and illustrate a story of dominance every match they have! These two teams met once before and AoP won back then. Will they go 2-0 towards another DRC finals? Or will Ford & Dawkins shock the world?

Ford starts with Rezar, and Ford says he wants this more! Rezar pie-faces Ford and says about the same in his native tongue, so Ford tags out to Dawkins. Dawkins ties up with Rezar but Rezar powers him to a corner and gives body shots. Rezar sits Dawkins down for knees to his head, then backs off at the referee’s order. Tag to Akam, Akam mugs Dawkins with body shots. Akam rams in knees of his own, then clubs away on Dawkins in the corner. Dawkins gets to an open corner and reverses the whip to dropkick Akam. Dawkins fires off firearms, and a big European Uppercut! Rezar comes in, Dawkins rocks him with another uppercut. He hits Akam with a SPINEBUSTER! The fans and Ford are all fired up now, but Ford ends up face-to-face with Ellering. And he offers him a drink!

The fans want Ellering to “Take a sip! Take a sip!” But he slaps the cup down?! Ford has had about enough, but Ellering warns him not to mess with him. Akam clobbers Dawkins, then Rezar returns and they hit Dawkins with the Last Chapter!

Cover, the AoP win!

Winners: The Authors of Pain (Akam & Rezar, Akam pins)

Ford realizes the mistake he made, and is furious with himself. The Authors of Pain are 2-0 on the Street Profits, and could repeat as Dusty Rhodes Classic winners. Who will meet them in the finals has yet to be determined, but will it really matter?

 

Backstage interview with William Regal.

Cathy Kelly asks the NXT GM about his ground-breaking announcement for the Six Man NXT North American Championship Ladder Match. Who else does he plan on adding to this historic match? He just finalized the details on the second man to enter that match, it will be Adam Cole. But then the Velveteen Dream walks over.

The Patrick Clark Experience compliments Regal on looking well, then brings up the NXT NAC. Ground-breaking, but it’s not an experience the NXT Universe can get behind. But, maybe if Velveteen Dream was in the match, it could be. Regal knows Velveteen has been very impressive since debuting, so he will be the third man in that ladder match. Velveteen knows the NAC broke ground, but putting Velveteen in the match just set the stage. With the field halfway set, how much more star power will be put in this stellar match?

 

Lars Sullivan VS John Silver!

The Leviathan returns! Brilliant yet brutal, intense yet intellectual, terrifying yet tactical. Forget winning, can John Silver even survive the sinister Sullivan?

The bell rings, and Silver ties up with Sullivan, only to be thrown down and clubbed into the mat. Sullivan drags Silver up, and throws him hard into buckles! He drags Silver up again for another toss into another corner, but he’s still not done. Sullivan waits for Silver to stand up, to squash him! Sullivan military presses Silver, and then brings him into the powerslam! Yet this is still not the end. Sullivan climbs up to the top rope! For a HUMONGOUS diving headbutt!

Sullivan drags Silver up once more, for the Freak Accident!

Cover, Sullivan wins!

Winner: Sullivan, by pinfall

As if there was going to be any other outcome. Now that Sullivan has returned, will anyone on the NXT roster have half a chance of stopping him?

 

Another backstage interview with William Regal.

Three men have been confirmed for the Six Man Ladder Match, but we’re all still curious as to the other three. That’s when Lars Sullivan arrives backstage, and Regal congratulates him on his return victory.

Clearly Sullivan still has his “appetite for destruction”, and it’s great timing. Regal asks if Sullivan would like part in the North American Championship match. Sullivan says, “That sounds fantastic, Mr. Regal.” Sullivan will “unequivocally and categorically” bring the brand of destruction only he can, but not just with his hands, but with a ladder! That’ll be at TakeOver: New Orleans. Next week, Sullivan wants KILLIAN DAIN! Regal confirms Killian Dain is also in the Ladder Match, so the Leviathan will get a match with the Beast of Belfast. “Good.” When monsters collide, will Full Sail survive?!

 

Dakota Kai VS !

The Captain of Team Kick has fully recovered from the arm injury the Queen of Spades gave her.

 

BREAKING: Andrade Almas attacks Aleister Black in the parking lot!

El Idolo goes after the Embodiment of the End in an ambush, with Zelina Vega cheering him on! He tells the “perro” that he is going to pay, and then kicks him while he’s down. Vega says, “That’s what you get!” and Almas tells Aleister he will respect the champion! They spot an ice chest, and both Vega and Almas get the same idea. Almas brings Aleister over, and plunges the #1 contender’s head into the chilling water!

Aleister gasps for air, but Almas keeps on him by throwing him into a door. Almas drags and stomps Aleister out to ringside, Vega still egging things on. The fans boo and jeer as Almas throws Aleister into the ring, ruining the Women’s Division match. Almas grabs a chair, and SMACKS Aleister in the back! Vega brings the NXT Championship into the ring while Almas stands the chair on Aleister’s back. Almas holds the belt while pushing the chair into Aleister’s back while declaring, “Yo soy campeon! I am the champion!”

Fans boo and jeer more as Almas moves the chair aside to choke Aleister directly. Almas stands over Aleister, title raised above. He and Vega then leave, while referees rush to check on Aleister. Almas raises the title again on the stage, his message sent. El Campeon demands respect, but will he even have a match after what he did to his challenger?

 

Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic Semifinals match: SAnitY VS Roderick Strong & Pete Dunne!

Chaos reigned once before when Eric Young & Alexander Wolfe held the NXT Tag Team Championships before. The Messiah of the Backbreaker wants his first taste of gold, and the Bruiserweight wouldn’t mind having a second belt on top of his WWE United Kingdom Championship. Which duo will win to challenge the Authors of Pain in the finals?

Wolfe starts against Strong as the bell rings. The two circle, tie up, and Strong gets around for the waistlock to float into the facelock. Wolfe pushes Strong but Strong pushes back as he shifts into a headlock. Wolfe powers out but Strong kicks his back drop away. Strong runs out but Wolfe scoops to slam him. Dunne and Young come in and it’s a stand-off between all four men. The referee counts and the illegal partners exit. Wolfe and Strong back off and tag in Young and Dunne. Dunne and Young circle, tie up, and move around, going back and forth in the same corner. The referee counts again, Dunne wrenches Young’s arm and goes for fingers. Young reverses to whip Dunne, but then runs into a roll-up, TWO!

Dunne kicks Young’s arm out, but Wolfe and Strong come in now. The referee won’t stand for disorder, he tells them to exit. Strong and Wolfe exit, Dunne and Young circle. Dunne whips and runs Young over with a clothesline, then covers, ONE. Dunne whips but Young reverses and clobbers Dunne with his own clothesline, then whips but Dunne reverses. Young goes up and over while Wolfe tags in. Dunne hits buckles, Young puts him in an abdominal stretch while Wolfe runs, Wolfe boots Dunne in the chest!

Wolfe rains rights and lefts and the fans applaud while we go to break.

NXT returns once more, and we see Wolfe tag Young back in. Wolfe lifts Dunne in a gutwrench for a gutbuster, Young adds a flying ax handle. Cover, TWO, but Young keeps on Dunne at the ropes. The referee backs him off, Dunne rocks Young with a forearm! Tag to Strong, and Strong stomps away on Young. Strong puts Young in a corner and rams in shoulders before giving a sharp chop. Tag to Dunne, Strong and Dunne each give a chop to Young. Strong lifts Young for a pendulum backbreaker while Dunne hops up, Dunne jumps for a stomp! Cover, TWO, but Dunne keeps on Young with a grounded hammerlock. Dunne wrenches while fans rally, Dunne stretches Young’s free arm back and gives it a hard yank. He drags Young up and whips him to a corner, then gives him a running overhand chop.

Dunne keeps on Young with body shots, then whips corner to corner, but Young tumbles to the apron. Young shoulders in, slips under Dunne, but Dunne stomps him out before he can tag Wolfe. Dunne goes after that bad arm more with a bodyscissor and double wristlock!

Young endures the hoverboard, then powers out to a suplex! Both men are down while the fans applaud. The fans rally, Dunne and Young hot tag to Strong and Wolfe. Strong and Wolfe throw haymakers back and forth, neither one slowing down, but only speeding up! Strong gets the edge with elbows but Wolfe shoves him away. Wolfe boots but Strong holds the ropes. Strong boots back, but Wolfe EuroUppers! Wolfe fireman carry lifts Strong but Strong slips out, shoves and kitchen sink knees Wolfe against the ropes. Young comes in but Strong catches him with a back elbow. Strong fireman carry lifts Wolfe now, but Wolfe slips out to a waistlock and German Suplexes Strong! Wolfe keeps going, fireman carry to Death Valley Driver! Cover, TWO! It was close, so SAnitY keeps moving. Wolfe tags Young, wheelbarrow lift, EuroUpper, wheelbarrow neckbreaker! Young covers, Dunne breaks it!

Wolfe returns but Dunne throws him out, Wolfe manages to stay on the apron. Dunne goes to hit Wolfe but Wolfe hits Dunne first. Wolfe climbs up, but Dunne forearms him out of the air! Young runs at Dunne and hits neckbreaker! Dunne rolls out of the ring, Young gets to a corner and climbs up while Strong stirs. Strong stops Young up top with a right hand and chop. Strong climbs up, but Young fights back. Young throws Strong down with a gordbuster, then adjusts for a Macho Elbow!

Cover, TWO, and Young can’t believe it! He argues it out with the referee but it was a two. Young walks over to Strong, Strong kicks out a leg then kicks him in the chest. Strong stands up while Young staggers. Young swings, but gets caught into a backbreaker! Cover, but Wolfe breaks it just in time. Dunne runs in but misses the enziguri. Wolfe grabs him and German Suplexes, but Dunne lands on his feet. Dunne kicks Wolfe in the head, Strong hits him with End of Heartache! Strong gives Young a Shining Wizard in the corner, Dunne tags in, back suplex hand-off into the Bitter End!

Cover, Dunne & Strong win!

Winners: Strong & Dunne, Dunne pins

The unlikely duo of the Back Breaker & Bruiserweight have beaten former NXT Tag Team Champions! Can they do it again against the bigger and badder Akam & Rezar next week?

 

One last interview with William Regal.

With five men decided, there is still a question of who will be the sixth. Regal says the deal has been struck, and fetches the sixth superstar from inside his office. The door opens and out walks…

RICOCHET! The fans lose their minds at this other major recruit making a surprise appearance. And in regards to this historic match, ll the King of Speed has to say is, “See you at TakeOver.” The stars are aligning for the NXT’s newest title, who will be the inaugural North American Champion?!

 


 

My Thoughts:

To say this was an amazing episode probably doesn’t do it justice. This was another full hour, and the pacing was smooth transition to smooth transition of everything. We start with another genius Ciampa promo for fans to shower Heel heat on him, and then we get a no nonsense announcement of the “unsanctioned” grudge match. It’s going to be like their Cruiserweight Classic match but even better. The TM61 segment that becomes a Shayna-Ember segment was also good, it adds to the NXT Women’s Championship story without too much fuss or worry about words.

Then as rumored, we get our NXT men’s mid-card title announcement, but it was made even better by the surprise appearance of EC3! EC3 is great on the mic, great in the ring, and he’s a great choice for the inaugural NAC match. In fact, all the choices for that match are great, from Adam Cole to Velveteen to the monsters, Lars & Damo, and especially the final choice of Ricochet. Spreading the announcements throughout the episode was actually rather smart, too, it gives the appearance of Regal negotiating the deals out, and helps add more moments of suspense and surprise. Especially since they got to end the night on the great surprise of seeing Ricochet come out of the office without warning.

The matches tonight were great as always, with some good surprises sprinkled in, as well. Logically, Authors of Pain win, not that Street Profits aren’t a good team. There was also a nice story building as Ford lets his emotions get the better of him and that costs them. Lars Sullivan wins because duh, he’s Lars Sullivan. I thought it was brilliant Dakota Kai appears only for her not to wrestle at all, and Almas is even more Heel with his beat down of Aleister. Then another surprise, Dunne & Strong win again. They might win it all at this rate, which will work with Strong’s story of always opposing the Undisputed Era. It’s a shame Bobby Fish got hurt, but word is that Cole might do double duty under Freebird Rules, so it still works.

My Score: 8.8/10

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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Live Results & Report! (12/11/18)

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SmackDown cover image

SmackDown brings us a Wrestlemania Rematch this close to TLC! The Queen ended the Empress of Tomorrow’s undefeated streak, but will history repeat itself?

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Daniel Bryan VS Mustafa Ali; Bryan wins.
  • The Miz & Shane McMahon VS Chip & Chad; The Miz & Shane win.
  • Samoa Joe & Shinsuke Nakamura VS Jeff Hardy & Rusev w/ Lana; Hardy & Rusev win.
  • Charlotte Flair VS Asuka; wins.

PLAY BY PLAY

Daniel Bryan heads to the ring!

Or should we say, the new Daniel Bryan. Either way, the WWE Championship will be on the line against the Phenomenal AJ Styles. However, it’s a minor miracle Styles can even compete after what this Daniel Bryan did to his leg at the end of last week. Fans boo and jeer this Bryan as he picks up a mic. Bryan recalls calling the WWE Universe a bunch of sheep. He wants to apologize for that. Bryan wants to apologize to sheep. Sheep don’t deserve to be compared to such idiots! They’re not the ones destroying the planet with endless consumption. It’s not a “carbon hoof print.” The fans aren’t sheep. They’re parasites! Fans disagree, and believe “Daniel Sucks!” He just calls them fickle.

As he was saying, fans are parasites because they take and take and give nothing in return, especially in Las Vegas. But Bryan isn’t surprised, because fans latched on tot he Old Bryan and lived vicariously through him. That’s what the Yes Movement really was. “Well guess what? The Old Daniel Bryan is dead! And the Yes Movement is dead!” But just like any parasite, the fans have moved on to a new “fickle field”. And these idiots all sit on the couch in the House that AJ Styles Built. Fans cheer for Styles, but Bryan reminds us he is the WWE Champion! And at TLC, Bryan vows to crush Styles’ dream of reclaiming the title, and then the announcement will be “Still WWE Champion, the NEW Daniel Bryan!”

Do fans not believe him? “No! No!” Well Bryan debates with friends all the time, “sometimes you don’t know whether your’e stupid or you deliberately pull the wool over your eyes so you don’t have to realize the facts.” Stupidity is the deliberate cultivation of ignorance. Like in Vegas! But wait, here comes Bryan’s opponent for tonight, the Beacon of Light, Mustafa Ali! Ali responds to Bryan with an introduction, but Bryan already knows who he is. The idiot fans might not but Bryan does. And he knows they’re having a match later, but Ali can join him now. Bryan gives Ali an introduction, and it seems fans do know who he is. Ali is the Heart of 205 Live, and is an incredible performer. Bryan sees a lot of his former self in Ali.

So Bryan gives Ali advice: they don’t need to have this match tonight. Bryan tells Ali that the fans won’t care, “they’re too self-absorbed” and xenophobic. These fickle fans do not deserve this great match. Fans boo so Bryan calls them all fickle. But Ali wants to know what happened to Bryan. Bryan inspired wrestlers like Ali to become a superstar. The entire 205 Live roster looks up to Bryan because Bryan stood toe to toe with any giant and proved he had heart. So what happened? Bryan talks about the Old Bryan, but that Old Bryan would want a fight. Ali wants a fight! Bryan paces while fans chant “Fight! Fight!” Bryan asks Ali what kind of car he drives. What does that have to do with this? But, it’s an SUV.

Bryan doesn’t like that. Ali is small, why does he need a car so big? Well, he has a wife and kids- Bryan slaps him! Bryan says Ali is ignorant, and slaps him again. So Ali fights back! Bryan whips but Ali reverses and headscissors Bryan tot he apron! Then dropkicks Bryan out, and leaps with a senton! Ali looks to shut this New Bryan up, next!

 

Daniel Bryan VS Mustafa Ali!

SmackDown returns as Bryan whips Ali and knocks him down with a kitchen sink knee. Bryan drags Ali up for a headbutt then toys with him. Fans boo as Bryan taunts Ali then bumps him off buckles. Bryan kicks away on Ali in the corner, then soaks up the heat. Bryan drags Ali up with an arm wrench, then whips him corner to corner. Ali goes up but Bryan catches him with a kick. Bryan kicks Ali while he’s down, then drops knees. Bryan hooks Ali’s face but lets up at 4. Ali gets to a corner but Bryan rocks him with a European Uppercut. Bryan grabs Ali for a toehold, then drops an elbow on the knee. Bryan hooks the legs and grabs at the arms. Ali resists so Bryan hooks the nose instead!

Bryan lets up at 4, then hooks the nose again. He lets go at 4, and then lets off the legs to stomp Ali on the back! Fans boo but Bryan soaks up the heat. Bryan stalks Ali and gives him the Yes Kicks. OR perhaps now, the “No Kicks” because fans say “No!” with each one. Bryan aims but Ali dodges to kick back! Ali SUPERKICKS Bryan in the back, covers, TWO! Bryan bails out but Ali builds speed to wreck him with a dropkick! Ali slingshots but Bryan dodges to send Ali into the post! Bryan grins while we go picture in picture.

Ali is down while Bryan catches his breath. Bryan climbs up top to make sure everyone can see him. Then he goes back for Ali on the outside, but leaves him for dead. Bryan soaks up the heat and counts along, but Ali gets in at 9! Bryan looks annoyed by the resilient Ali. He kicks Ali while he’s down, then drags him up. Bryan snap suplexes Ali down, then heads up top. Ali gets up and stops Bryan! Ali climbs up to join Bryan, and hits a SUPER SPANISH FLY!! But Ali flounders away, he crawls back to a cover, TWO!! Ali was so close to pinning THE WWE Champion! He hurries to put Bryan in a drop zone and goes back up. But Bryan trips Ali off and Ali hits the floor!

Bryan gets Ali back into the ring fast, and wraps on the No Lock! Ali moves around, enduring the hold. Bryan wrenches back hard, but Ali doesn’t give up. Ali drags himself and Bryan towards ropes as we return to single picture. Ali reaches, and gets the ropebreak! Bryan lets go, but is simply annoyed further. Bryan drags Ali up and puts him on the top rope backwards. He pulls Ali down into the Tree of Woe and gives more No Kicks. Bryan runs corner to corner, and hits a dropkick! Bryan drags Ali out of the Tree, then puts him back up. He climbs up behind Ali, but Ali slips out of the Super Back Suplex! Ali dodges Bryan and Bryan hits buckles! Ali CHOPS Bryan, and again, and again! Bryan kicks back and bump Ali off buckles.

Bryan whips but Ali reverses. Ali gets under Bryan to hit the tornado DDT! Cover, TWO! Ali again comes close and is shocked. Bryan ends up in a drop zone and Ali hurries up again. Ali leaps, 0-5-4 FLOPS! Bryan drags Ali over and slams his leg into the post! And again! And again! Ali crawls away but Bryan comes around from the corner to chop block the leg! Bryan drags Ali into the Heel Hook! Ali taps, Bryan wins!

Winner: The New Daniel Bryan, by submission

The WWE Champion’s new mean streak helps him snuff out the Beacon of Light tonight in Vegas! However, The Phenomenal One is coming for payback, will he become the new champion?

But Bryan isn’t done with Ali! He attacks Ali on the stage with those savage stomps! And he puts the Heel Hook on again! Ali taps but it doesn’t matter. More referees appear and Bryan lets Ali go. Fans boo but Bryan revels in it as he holds up his title. This mean streak runs deep, will it be the key to keeping the New Bryan the current champion?

 

Awww Vegas~! It’s time for a Rap Battle!

The New Day come out to host a special battle of bars between The Usos and The Bar!

SmackDown returns as Kofi Kingston, Xavier Woods and Big E stand ready as judges for this second ever SmackDown Rap Battle. Meanwhile, The Bar look like they stepped out from the 90’s. Now they’ll all be battling in the SmackDown Tag Team Championship Triple Threat. The Bar requested this battle but the New Day won’t allow for any funny business. Sheamus starts off, “This has gone too far, Big Tony, hit them with the bar.” Cesaro starts a beat for “Ice Ice Shamy.” The Bar basically parody Vanilla Ice. Fans don’t know whether to laugh or boo. The New Day rank that… a trash can out of 10.

As for the Usos, Jimmy and Jey take a moment to collect themselves. “It’s the Usos VS the Bar in a rap off, I’m like it can’t be. What the hell are they about to talk about, UCe?” “Sheamus’ hair grease. Cesaro’s mouth piece.” The Usos got cheated, defeated, they removed it from their memories like Woken Hardy: DELETED. They beat the Ninja Turtles, and now it’s on to Bebop and Rock Steady. “FELLA~!” Mr. Movie Star, they’re not stealing a line but that was booty. Usos show love, like cupid. Sheamus looks dumb. No, like stupid! Is Sheamus purposefully staying white like chalk? Does he have Cesaro help him with the mohawk? Brogue Kicks VS Superkick, ain’t no pump action, those come from the hip, hit you in the teeth. But how do you knock Cesaro’s teeth out with no knuckles? I dunno. Let’s introduce our friend, Mr. Turnbuckle.

Hello, Mr. Turnbuckle! How did it feel? Well when he pushed Cesaro’s teeth down his throat, we learned who’s the real man of steel. Cesaro the Swiss Superman, right? King of Swing, right? But that won’t matter against their Uso kryptonite! The Bar sets the bar? No this is a true tag team, they’re the stars. Ten years, still going hard, zero injuries, Uso Iron Man! Tony Stark!! The Usos are bulletproof, are the truth and still have fun. Back to back tag team of the year, six time champs coming soon. The Bar, New Day, Usos, Sunday, Welcome to the Uso Penitentiary! The Bar have heard enough, they start swinging! The Usos are ready, and they hit back! Cesaro and Sheamus get sent out, and then the Usos are ready to throw with The New Day.

But The Bar comes back to blow it all up! BROGUE for Jey, and then a beating for the hosts! Jey gets up, but gets A-Swiss-ted White Noise! The Bar hold up their titles, and as the Usos said themselves, “We ARE the Bar!” Will #RunBAR continue to run the SmackDown Tag Team Division after TLC’s Triple Threat?

 

Asuka speaks.

“I thought nobody would be ready for Asuka. I was wrong, I was not ready, I made one mistake.” The mistake was Asuka let up. But this Sunday, Asuka will kick, strike, climb and grab that title to win. As for tonight, Charlotte won’t be ready this time! The Empress is fired up, will she settle the score from back at Wrestlemania?

 

The Miz is in the ring!

He holds the World Cup trophy, and tells Shane McMahon that while it’s his week to have custody, Miz needs to speak his mind. Miz wants Shane to come out, and doesn’t want to have to beg. Fans want to see him beg. Miz concedes, and kneels. He bends the knee, and asks Shane come out to talk. This is bigger than a trophy, so please come out. Shane O’Mac appears! He joins Miz in the ring, and says “What’s up, Las Vegas?” And what is up with Miz? Is he okay? Why is Miz out here with the trophy? It’s the only way Miz can get through to him! Shane won’t respond to him. They can be so good together, if he’d just give Miz a chance.

Miz knows Shane is scared, and so is Miz. But Shane owes Miz one. They should tag together again. If they lose, fine, this can stop. But if they win, they can be the #BestTeamintheWorld! Shane thinks this is getting weird. No, the trophy is just a symbol. They can be so much more! Then enlighten him. Okay, fine. Miz will say this for the first time in his life. In fact, Miz will show him! Get a referee out here! A referee appears. They’ll take on Chip & Chad, The Vegas Boys! Chip & Chad appear, and the match is set?

The Miz & Shane McMahon VS Chip & Chad!

Shane is very confused, and tries to reason with Miz while the bell rings. Chip and Chad attack Shane! Miz is shocked, but he coaches Shane up. Shane fires off fast hands! He knocks Chip(?) down then throws him out! Shane dares Chad(?) to fight, and he lights him up with jabs! Shane whips then hits a big back elbow. He hits Chip away and then gives Chad a float-over DDT! Fans want Miz to get in, but he’s busy holding the world cup. Shane brings Chad into a triangle hold! Miz is already celebrating before Chad taps out. Shane & Miz win!

Winners: The Miz & Shane McMahon, Shane by submission

The Best Team in the World finally succeeds! But Miz is clearly more pumped then Shane is about it. Will Shane come around and join Miz on this tag team journey to the top? Or is Miz just seeing what he wants to see?

 

Paige is furious with the referee.

They can’t just be making matches without the GM’s consent! Especially with the commissioner. But The Miz said she gave permission. Paige sees what’s going on now. But just as she tells the ref to hush, Chip & Chad come in, with invoices. The Miz said they were getting paid $5000 each for that match. Paige tears up the invoices, and tells everyone to leave. Will the GM have words for the overly ambitious A-Lister?

 

Randy Orton heads to the ring!

The Viper prepares for a Chairs Match with the King of Lucha Libre! These two will be able to do whatever they want with those infamous steel weapons. Orton brings one into the ring with him, and says “Nothing like a good ol’ fashioned solid steel chair, am I right?” They’re built for comfort, but can also make a statement. Orton rolls footage of how he’s used these chairs to brutalize Rey Mysterio these last few weeks, namely wrapped around Mysterio’s head before being thrown into a steel post. Orton likes that, but perhaps we can do better. He rolls more footage, as he did very much the same thing, but throwing Mysterio into steel steps this time.

“Now let me get this straight.” Mysterio knows he has a Chairs Match, and is okay with that? Everyone’s seen what Orton does to his opponent, yet Mysterio is okay with that? Mysterio must think he’ll get his revenge. But Mysterio is a victim, and victims don’t get revenge. The locker room will be worried about TLC, but Mysterio needs to be worried about RKO. But Mysterio SMACKS Orton from behind! Mysterio jabs the chair into Orton, then SMACKS him again! Then he tosses the chair at Orton, to dropkick it in his head! Orton is on the ropes, and Mysterio hits the 619! Orton bails out, but Mysterio wants more! Will the Viper be a victim after Sunday?

 

Backstage interview with Becky Lynch.

If Charlotte Flair and Asuka beat each other up badly enough, does that give her an advantage in the SmackDown Women’s Championship TLC? Advantage? Becky’s getting back in the ring, road testing both her banged up face and her banged up brain, in one of the most dangerous matches in all of WWE. And not just against one but two of the best. So no, there is no advantage. But Becky still loves it. Fighting against the odds is what Becky does. And doctors can get all twitchy, but she’ll still scout her opponents tonight. And then on Sunday, she’ll remind all of us how much chaos can happen when The Man comes around.

 

Samoa Joe & Shinsuke Nakamura VS Jeff Hardy & Rusev w/ Lana!

The Destroyer wants to remind the Enigma of his troubled past, while the King of Strong Style wants to make it clear the Super Athlete will never relive his glory days. Will Hardy and Rusev uniting be enough to show Joe and Nakamura that it’s not about the past but the future?

Nakamura and Joe troll their opponents, but then the FABULOUS Truth appears? Dance Break~! The music hits and the flossing begins! “Proceed.” Nakamura kicks Hardy and the match begins! Nakamura drives in knees, then stomps Hardy down. He tags in Joe and Joe drives down elbows. Hardy hits back and Joe bails out. Joe drags Hardy out to join him and then throws Hardy into barriers. The Destroyer looms over the Enigma as we go picture in picture.

Joe puts Hardy back in the ring and stands hardy up. He tags to Nakamura and Nakamura stomps away in the corner. Nakamura gives Hardy Bad Vibrations, then taunts Rusev. He says “C’MON!” and Rusev takes the bait, but the ref keeps him back. Nakamura goes back to Hardy for a snapmare and knee drop! Cover, TWO! Joe tags in but Hardy flounders for Rusev. Joe drags him back and stomps Hardy out, before driving elbow after elbow into Hardy’s shoulder. He wrenches Hardy’s neck and Hardy endures as fans rally. Hardy stands up and fights back, but runs into Joe’s back elbow. Joe covers, TWO! Joe stands Hardy up for jabs as we return to single picture.

The referee counts and Joe backs off. Hardy fires off but Joe reverses the whip to hit the back elbow to Pele! Hardy goes down, Joe covers, but Rusev breaks it. Joe keeps on Hardy with another snapmare, and chops to the shoulder. He tags in Nakamura and Nakamura stomps on Hardy. Nakamura brings Hardy up in a facelock, then rams his knee in. He puts Hardy on the top rope and hits the Top Shelf Knee! Cover, TWO! Nakamura keeps his eyes on Rusev as he tags Joe back in. Joe kicks Hardy while he’s down, then pulls on the arms for the half surfboard. Rusev and fans rally for Hardy, and Hardy gets up. Hardy kicks and punches Joe, but Joe denies the Twist. Joe runs into the corner but into an elbow. Whisper in the Wind hits! Both men are down but fans fire up!

Hardy and Joe crawl for their corners as fans chant “Rusev Day!” Hot tag to Nakamura, then to Rusev! The Bulgarian Brute rallies on the Rockstar, and throws haymakers! Rusev whips and clobbers him at the ropes. Rusev scoops Nakamura to ram in his knee, then throws him with the Fall Away Slam! Nakamura gets to a corner but Rusev runs in for the back shoulder, and then the spinning heel kick! Fans fire up with Rusev as he stomps the mat. Nakamura slowly stands, and he elbows Rusev away. Rusev still lifts but Nakamura slips out. Nakamura swings but misses, Rusev’s roundhouse connects! Cover, but Joe breaks it. Hardy gives Joe the Twist of Fate!

Hardy follows after, and leaps off the apron! He wipes Joe out, but Nakamura runs at Rusev. Drop toehold, into the Accolade. Nakamura escapes to use his strike fest, then aims from a corner. But he runs into a MACHKA KICK instead! Cover, Rusev & hardy win!

Winners: Jeff Hardy & Rusev, Rusev pinning

The Bulgarian Brute pins the United States Champion! Will Rusev use this to launch back into the title scene? Will Hardy be able to render Joe’s mind games OBSOLETE?

 

Shane McMahon confronts The Miz backstage.

What is going on with him and the trophy? Paying competitors to attack Shane? Tricking an official into calling a match no one sanctioned? Miz is crossing a line. Miz admits it! But he won’t apologize. Shane’s instincts kicked in and won, just like he did at the World Cup! That kill-or-be-killed McMahon instinct! Miz has main evented Wrestlemania, has a film franchise and a reality TV series, but he’s never been considered Best in the World. Not until Shane came along. Miz offers a handshake, but Shane denies it. Miz is left hanging, will he give up this pursuit? Or will he only be all the more motivated?

 

Backstage interview with AJ Styles.

“The New Daniel Bryan” took the WWE Championship through underhanded means, but is Styles ready to take the title back? Styles is biding his time, because no one else wants to beat Bryan up more than he does. He’s counting the days, hours and minutes to TLC. This “new” Bryan isn’t that new. It’s more like “the real” Bryan. But there’s only one Phenomenal One, and that’s AJ Styles. Styles is ready for revenge, but will he get satisfaction on Sunday?

 

Charlotte Flair VS Asuka!

The Queen and the Empress are both ready for TLC’s first ever Women’s TLC match, that is also a triple threat with the champion, Becky Lynch. However, tonight is about a rematch from their epic SmackDown Women’s Championship Wrestlemania match! Will Charlotte be able to repeat history? Or will she find she’s no longer ready for Asuka?

SmackDown returns with a backstage interview from Charlotte. She’s days away from another historic first, but what about this amazing rematch? Charlotte knows what’s at stake. Asuka says she’s going to break Charlotte, but The Queen doesn’t break. The Queen breaks streaks. This will be a preview of how Charlotte will make them bow down to the Queen! The Queen makes her entrance, and we begin!

 

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Joe’s Lucha Libre Weekly: News & Analysis (12/9/10)

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What happened in CMLL, AAA, and the world of Lucha Libre this week? Joe Dinan has you covered!




CMLL

Last Friday Arena Mexico

So this was the Legends of Mexico show or Leyenda de Mexicana. The main event was a legends match which… wasn’t exactly good. It’s fun to see legends in the ring, and that’s why the fans were there but judging from a match point of view they couldn’t really move well. The match included Rayo de Jalisco, Atlantis, and Blue Panther vs Mascara Ano 2000, Canek, and Villano IV. In fairness Blue Panther can still move really well for his age. Rayo, Blue Panther, and Atlantis won the match. There was a 6 man tag titles match between Los Guerrero’s facing Sanson, Cuatrero, and Forastero. Los Guerrero’s retained their titles. Mano Negra, Solar, and Felino faced off against Fuerza Guerrera, Jerry Estrada who hasn’t been in Arena Mexico for 25 years, and Negro Navarro. That match was okay.

Arena Puebla Monday Show

The main event saw Rush and Terrible facing Volador and Diamante Azul. Volador and Azul won the match and at the end Terrible wanted to face Volador in a match. That’ll happen in the future I assume. Co Main event saw Atlantis, Soberano, and Valiente facing Felino, Bucanero, and Cavernario. It was a fun match with the latter winning.

Arena Mexico Tuesday Show

The main event of this show saw Sanson, Cuatrero, and Forastero facing Atlantis, Angel de Oro, and Niebla Roja. This was a fun match which saw the latter winning. I feel like they’re setting up an Atlantis match with Sanson out of this. Titan, Triton, and Esfinge faced off against Mephisto, Luciferno, and Ephesto. It was a really fun match with Mephisto, Luciferno, and Ephesto winning. Misterioso defeated Black Panther in a lightning match as well.

Arena Mexico Friday

The card this Friday sees the main event being Volador Jr facing Ultimo Guerrero in a singles match. It doesn’t appear that the heavyweight championship is on the line. Atlantis, Valiente, and Azul face Rush, Terrible, and Cavernario in the co main event. This really isn’t that big or important of a show based off the match card. I don’t expect the attendance to be over 10,000 this week.




AAA

AAA was live on Twitch on December 2nd. Every title was on the line but the story during the show was Brian Cage sent in a video message with Melissa Santos explaining in Spanish that he had a ton of injuries and couldn’t make it to the show. I think that was just to save face since Fenix also couldn’t wrestle because Cage just worked a match on Wednesday. Fenix comes out to cut a promo and explain things. The fans boo him because AAA stupidly kept promoting the match knowing for 9 days that Fenix wasn’t going to wrestle. He even mentioned it on their Lucha Capital show on Facebook the previous Wednesday. The false advertisement and use of card subject to change to trick the fans is bullshit. Subject to change means the card changes if an injury or last minute thing happens. It’s not a free pass to advertise matches you know you’re never going to do. Anyway on to the card.

Lady Shani won the title in the first match. Keyra was supposed to be in the match to make it a 5 way but she was at a WWE try out in Chile. So it was a four way and Scarlett Bordeaux left the match mid way through. So Shani won the match after Faby had a spat with the ref. The next match built on the angle of Mascara and Maximo. Mascara and his team win the match further continuing the feud. There’s talks of Maximo and Mascara being in a hair vs hair match.

Laredo Kid, Hijo Del Vikingo, and Angelikal who is now called Myzteziz Jr, as AAA La Parka pronounced him earlier in the show (Have fun typing Myzteziz.), faced Porde de Norte for the 6 man tag titles. The story going in here was the former team beat Porde de Norte 3 straight times so conventional thinking is they won’t win this match, but they actually did, crowning new champs. There was an impromptu match afterwards where Vikingo was taken out by the OGTs and La Parka replaced him. They still beat the OGTs, later we learned this match was because there was no Fenix vs Cage match.

Pagano and Joe Lider faced Ciclope and Miedo Extremo and Texano and Rey Escorpion for the tag titles in a hardcore match. It wasn’t as hardcore as the previous matches but it was still pretty hardcore. Texano and Rey retain their titles. Fantasma faced Drago to defend his Latin American championship. The story of the match was Fantasma was dominating and Drago just kept kicking out and Drago basically rolled him up for the win. As said before Cage and Fenix didn’t wrestle.

The main event was between Blue Demon Jr and Killer Kross facing Dr. Wagner Jr and Psycho Clown. Scarlett came out with Kross to distract. Vampiro came out to stop her but Kross kills him. Kross and Blue Demon ended up winning and Scarlett was hitting Wagner after the match. You know she’s going to get hers soon. Better not show anyone in the United States. They’ll complain to Roshfrans.

AAA on Twitch 12/8

There’s a show on the 8th which isn’t much of a star driven show. The main event features Dr. Wagner Jr, Psycho Clown, and Pagano facing Blue Demon Jr, Killer Kross, and Rey Escorpion. I’m sure Scarlett Bordeaux will be by ring side for that. The Co-Main event sees the OGTs facing Porde de Norte. That’s Averno, Chessman, and Super Fly vs Mocho Cota Jr, Carta Brava Jr, and Tito Santana. Aerostar will face Monster Clown in a special singles match. Laredo Kid, Hijo Del Vikingo and a luchador surprise who might just be Myzteziz Jr will face Taurus, Australian Suicide, and Jack Evans.




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