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Mitchell’s NXT UK TakeOver: Cardiff Results & Report! (8/31/19)

The time has come to take over!

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NXT UK TakeOver: Cardiff

Cardiff is NXT!

And all the gold is on the line! From the WWE United Kingdom Championship, NXT UK Women’s Championship and NXT UK Tag Team Championships, who wins in Wales?

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Noam Dar VS Travis Banks; Dar wins.
  • Open Challenge: Cesaro VS Ilja Dragunov; Cesaro wins.
  • NXT UK Tag Team Championship Triple Threat: The Grizzled Young Veterans VS Gallus VS Mark Andrews & Flash Morgan Webster; Andrews & Webster win and become new NXT UK Tag Team Champions.
  • Last Man Standing: Dave Mastiff VS Joe Coffey; Coffey wins.
  • NXT UK Women’s Championship: Toni Storm VS Kay Lee Ray; KLR wins and becomes the new NXT UK Women’s Champion.
  • WWE United Kingdom Championship: WALTER VS Tyler Bate; WALTER wins and retains the WWE United Kingdom Championship.

PLAY BY PLAY

It’s the TakeOver Kickoff Show!

Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness and Aiden English will lead us into all the action with recaps and predictions!

 

Backstage interview with Cesaro!

The Swiss Cyborg promised to be in Cardiff, and now he’s here! What did he mean by his “hands on” approach? What does Radzy mean what does he mean? Cesaro is making an OPEN CHALLENGE to the NXT UK Roster! Who will step to the European Uppercut machine!?

 

War will be waged in Wales!

Imperium is absolute power, and vow to bring us all to a better NXT UK. The mat is sacred, and they are not here to play around. But as two behemoths battle until one can’t stand. As three teams fight for tag team glory. As a grudge is brought to the surface and finally settled. Only one man will atop the mountain of NXT UK! What happens when NXT UK takes over?

 

Noam Dar VS Travis Banks!

The Scottish Supernova claimed he was “guaranteed” a match on the card, but that was not so. However, the Kiwi Buzzsaw wants to finally be part of such an event, so he was more than happy to give Dar this fight. Will Dar shine like the star he thinks he is? Or will he be cut down by Banks?

The bell rings and fans are rallying for Banks. Banks and Dar circle and tie up. They go around and Dar powers Banks to a corner. The ref counts and Dar lets off with pinkies out. Banks wants after Dar but Dar backs off more. The two tie up again and fans rally. Banks powers Dar to a corner now and the ref counts. Banks smirks as he lets up, but Dar shoves. Dar uses the ropes for defense and then grins at Banks. Dar and Banks circle again and tie up. Dar gets the arm as fans start dueling. Banks rolls and handsprings to work on Dar’s wrist. Dar resists and they end up on the ropes. Dar snapmares Banks but Banks rolls up. Things speed up, Dar gets Banks’ leg but Banks throws Dar off. Banks misses his boot but avoids a leg sweep. Dar holds ropes to avoid a roundhouse, then he dodges and table tops Banks down. Banks catches Dar’s boot and throws him down! Dar dodges the Buzzsaw’s buzzsaw, and fans applaud as they stare down.

Dar mockingly applauds Banks and offers a handshake. Banks knows better than that, and catches the sucker punch! Banks DECKS Dar, then starts kicking the leg! Dar has had leg problems just like Banks, so Banks uses that to his advantage. Banks whips but Dar slips out. Dar hurries around the corner but Banks comes over with a Penalty Kick! Banks puts Dar in and covers, TWO! Banks keeps his cool as he follows Dar to a corner. Banks goes side to side but Dar falls back and crawls away. Dar gets Banks with a back suplex to hang him out on the top rope! Dar then goes to a corner for a BIG lariat! Cover, TWO! Dar is annoyed but he keeps on Banks’ bad leg with stomps. Fans rally up for Banks as Dar stomps the arms. Dar drags Banks up and slaps him around. Banks hits back with big body shots! Dar snapmares Banks into ropes, legs first! Cover, TWO!

Banks shakes feeling into his legs and arms, but Dar is on him again. Dar drags Banks into a corner while fans duel again. Dar throws forearms but Banks gives them back! Dar kicks out the bad leg, then drops an elbow on it! He keeps on Banks’ bad arm with a mounted armlock. Fans rally up and Banks fights up. Banks throws forearms but Dar gives the bad arm a shoulder breaker. Dar whips but Banks stops himself to kick out Dar’s legs! Banks goes side to side for a basement dropkick! And a deadlift German Suplex! Bridging cover, TWO! Dar lives and fans rally as Banks goes up top. Banks leaps, but has to roll through as Dar dodges. Banks gives Dar an uppercut in the corner, then whips him corner to corner. Dar goes up then under then around to a waistlock. Banks switches but Dar drops to kick away on Banks’ face! Then he reels Banks into a hammerlock!

Dar wants the other arm and elbows away until Banks gives it up! Fans rally and Banks makes it a cover, TWO! Dar has his own cover, TWO! Banks gets Dar down into a crossface! With a bit of straitjacket in it! Dar scrambles and rolls and gets a ropebreak! Banks lets go and Dar catches his breath. Dar calls to the ref, and the ref checks on him. Banks knows that trick so he goes after Dar anyway. Dar SLAPS Banks away! Banks just gets mad! But Dar baits him in to kick the legs out! Fans duel as Dar spins Banks around and around for a Fisherman Suplex! Cover, TWO! Banks lives and Dar grows frustrated. Dar goes to a corner and takes aim. Dar runs back out, to get Banks’ BOOT! Banks springboards, Slice of Heaven into a Champagne Super Kneebar! But Banks turns it over and starts throwing forearms with Dar. Fans rally and duel as each man throws big strikes. Both men knock the other down! Cardiff is loving “NXT! NXT!” for this great opener!

Both men rise at the count of 3, and Banks runs in at Dar. Dar puts him on the apron, but Banks dodges. Dar sweeps the legs then dropkicks Banks off! Dar snapmares Banks into steel steps! Dar puts Banks back in, takes aim again, clothesline to the back! Cover, TWO!! Banks survives again and Dar is beside himself. Fans continue to rally and duel as Dar drags Banks back up. Dar gives quick kicks to Banks’ chest, but Banks grows stronger! Banks whips, Dar goes up but Banks knew he’d go under! Dar sees he’s caught, Banks dropkicks Dar down! LEAPING STOMPS! Cover, TWO!! Dar survives but Banks won’t let up. Banks runs as Dar bails out, Banks DIVES! Kiwi TORPEDO busts Dar down! Banks throws Dar back in but Dar comes back out with a big left! Dar tells people to clear out, as he throws Banks at barriers! Banks uses the barriers for SLICE OF HEAVEN! Banks puts Dar back in then climbs up top. Banks leaps, DOUBLE STOMPS! Cover, TWO!! Dar survives Banks’ coup de grace, and Banks cannot believe it.

Cardiff continues to rally as Banks and Dar stand. Banks throws a forearm and Dar wobbles. Dar comes back with a forearm, but so does Banks. Dar hits again, but Banks returns with more! Banks gets the edge but they start throwing kicks! Dar uppercuts and again! But Banks rebounds with a rolling elbow! Banks runs in but misses in the corner. Dar bicycle BOOTS Banks! Banks blocks Dar’s second try, to get a shining wizard! Fans fire up with Banks as he vows to end it. Another springboard but he gets tripped up! Banks hobbles and Dar runs out, NOVA ROLLA!! Cover, Dar wins!!

Winner: Noam Dar, by pinfall

The Scottish Supernova makes good on his “guaranteed” TakeOver match! Like him or not, Mr. 11 was the better man tonight. Will this help Dar find his way to the top of NXT UK?

 

Backstage interview with Cesaro.

As Cesaro said earlier, he issues an OPEN CHALLENGE to the NXT UK roster. but it doesn’t matter who it is, Cesaro just wants a fight. And the man to step up to him backstage is Ilja Dragunov! It seems the Swiss Cyborg has found his fight!

 

Open Challenge: Cesaro VS Ilja Dragunov!

The Swiss Cyborg takes on the Moscow Madman in both men’s NXT UK TakeOver debut! Will Cesaro be able to stop UNBESIEGBAR? Or will the raging Russian prove he’s more than ready for the big time?

Ilja takes to the mic to say, “Ilja Dragunov is HERE! Cesaro! I’m waiting!!” And so, Cesaro appears and Cardiff goes wild!

The bell rings and Ilja runs right at Cesaro with a BOOT! Ilja fires off hands and CHOPS! Cesaro turns it around to CHOP back! And CHOP! Ilja flounders on the ropes but Cesaro CHOPS him again! Cesaro puts a headlock on but Ilja powers out. Cesaro runs Ilja over but Ilja is up fast. Cesaro puts on another headlock but Ilja powers out. They dodge each other and Ilja forearms, only to run into Cesaro’s arms! Cesaro pops Ilja up but Ilja slips out and avoids an uppercut. Cesaro avoids a chop, but Ilja has his dukes up to say, “Bring it!” Fans are loving NXT UK all over again. Cesaro gives a big EuroUpper and he rocks Ilja! Cesaro rocks Ilja again, but Ilja enjoys it! Ilja sits up for Cesaro to CHOP! Ilja CHOPS back, so Cesaro just CHOPS harder! Ilja CHOPS, boots, and CHOPS again! Senton dropped! Cover, ONE! Cesaro is right up but Ilja clotheslines him in the corner.

Ilja whips corner to corner but gets caught again, and TOSSED out of the ring! Cardiff is thunderous for Cesaro as he dusts off his hands. Cesaro goes out to fetch Ilja and brings him up, to drop him on the barriers! Ilja staggers away but Cesaro puts him in the ring. Cesaro takes his time returning as Ilja is in the corner. Ilja pushes Cesaro but Cesaro BOOTS Ilja! Cesaro scoops, slams and drops a leg! Cover, TWO! Ilja checks his throat but Cesaro wraps on a chinlock. Fans rally up and Ilja fights to his feet. llja elbows free, then runs, but back into the sleeper hold! Cesaro then back suplexes Ilja down hard! Cover, TWO! Cesaro keeps his cool as he watches Ilja. Fans want a “SWING! SWING!” and Cesaro obliges! But Ilja scrambles to ropes, so he gets a rope guillotine! Cesaro drops springboard stomps and wraps the chinlock back on.

Fans rally up again and Ilja again fights up and out of the hold. Cesaro whips Ilja but Ilja holds ropes to kick back. But he still runs into the sleeper! Another back suplex but it turns into Ilja’s crossbody! Cover, TWO, but Ilja uses the 619, only to get caught into the Swiss Swing! The fans count to 10, no 20, no 30, FORTY!! Even Cesaro got dizzy off that one! Cardiff is thunderous as Cesaro finds Ilja for a cover. TWO, into a crossface! Cesaro has Ilja caught, but Ilja drags himself over to ropes. Ilja has both arms free, but his face is still caught. Cesaro gets the arm again and rolls Ilja away from the ropes! Ilja starts fading, but he rolls to a cover, TWO! Cesaro JABS Ilja, then runs. Ilja 6-1-LINES! Both men are down and Cardiff is still loving this. Ilja and Cesaro go to opposite ends and Ilja runs in for a big knee! Then he keeps running, misses one clothesline but not the other! Cesaro is rocked and Ilja fires up.

Ilja lifts Cesaro in a fireman’s carry but Cesaro slips out. EuroUpper countered to a backslide, but Cesaro blocks with that superhuman strength. Ilja slips around to enziguri! Then Ilja waistlocks, but Cesaro blocks the half nelson! Cesaro twists that arm, so Ilja just goes under! Cesaro fights the lift, but Ilja still hits the overhead suplex! Cesaro bails out but Ilja runs to DIVE! One Moscow Torpedo hits, and fans are fired up again! Ilja puts Cesaro in the corner then climbs to the other. Ilja goes Coast2Coast for a missile dropkick! Cover, TWO!! Cesaro survives and shakes his head. Perhaps even Cesaro is shocked Ilja is pushing him this far. Ilja is up first and he CHOPS Cesaro. And CHOPS! Cesaro just powers up and CHOPS back. We have a CHOP fight! Cesaro JABS but Ilja fires off more CHOPS! So many chops!

Ilja fires up but gets a headbutt! Cesaro trophy lifts and drops Ilja with a Go To Swiss! Cover, TWO!?! Cesaro hits a BASEMENT Uppercut! Cover, TWO!!! Cardiff gives “NXT! NXT!” another ovation for this action! Cesaro looms over Ilja and brings him up. Cesaro spins but he gets caught to a backslide! TWO, and Ilja steps over to knee and lift! Death Valley into the corner! “This is Awesome!” Cesaro is down and Ilja heads up top. Ilja leaps, SUPER SENTON! Cover, TWO!! Cesaro survives again but Ilja has one last thing to try. Ilja fires up and fans join in with the “UN! BE! SIEG! BAR!” But Cesaro counters Torpedo Moscow with a POP-UP UPPERCUT! GOTCH NEUTRALIZER!! Cover, Cesaro wins!!

Winner: Cesaro, by pinfall

The Swiss Cyborg is victorious in Cardiff! A surprise debut, a surprise match-up, but perhaps not a surprise win. Is this a sign that Cesaro is going to stick around?

But what’s this? Cesaro returns to the ring and waits for Ilja to stand. Fans anticipate something even more devastating, but Cesaro actually just offers a handshake. Ilja takes it, and Cesaro even hugs the young Russian superstar. Fans love that even more! Is this Cesaro’s seal of approval on the Moscow Madman’s WWE career?

 

NXT UK Tag Team Championship Triple Threat: The Grizzled Young Veterans VS Gallus VS Mark Andrews & Flash Morgan Webster!

The hometown heroes won their way into this homecoming match in an unconventional way, but the Modfather did beat Mark Coffey and #MAndrews did beat Mr. Mayhem. They are the underdogs like never before, can they make their people proud while making history? Will these tag titles SOON belong to the sinister Scotsmen? Or will the titles stay with James Drake and Liverpool’s Number One, Zack Gibson?

The introductions are made, the belts are raised, and per Triple Threat tag rules, the match begins with just two men. Gibson and Andrews begin as fans chant for “WALES~! WALES~!”

Gibson tells Andrews to tune out the crowd and focus on him. Andrews is focused, even as fans taunt Gibson with song. The two tie up as fans take shoes off. Gibson wrenches one way then the other to arm-drag Andrews to the mat. Gibson gets both hands for a wristlock cover, TWO! Gibson powers Andrews back down, but Andrews bridges. Andrews monkey flips up to a sunset flip, TWO! Andrews wheelbarrows to arm-drag, but Gibson reverses right there! Gibson hammerlocks, wrenches and tags in Drake. Andrews gets free and arm-drags Drake once. Drake blocks, but gets the arm-drag on the other end. Andrews mule kicks then tags in the Modfather. The Welshmen double drag Drake, then hit a moonsault senton combo! FMW covers, ONE, but he keeps on Drake with a wrench and whip. He hits a forearm in the corner, tag to Andrews.

The Welshmen combine for a basement dropkick. Cover, TWO! Andrews keeps on Drake but Drake shoves him to the Gallus corner. Wolfgang tags in and goes after Drake while Coffey drags Andrews out! Wolfgang whips but Gibson saves Drake. Fans boo as Gibson has Wolfgang stay back. Everyone regroups and Drake returns to circle with Wolfgang. But then Drake tags out to FMW! FMW fires off on Gallus but Wolfgang hits back. Wolfgang shoves FMW but FMW comes back with a knee! FMW tilt-o-whirls to a sunset flip but Wolfgang sits on it. GYV shoves Wolfgang off and now all six men are in the ring! Fans are fired up as Coffey keeps Wolfgang calm. The Welshmen and GYV cool off, too, and Coffey tags in. Coffey waistlocks and slams FMW to then swing on Drake and Gibson! FMW comes back and huricanranas Coffey into GYV’s corner! Gibson tags in but FMW dropkicks him out!

Andrews hits Wolfgang, and Wales’ team has the ring! Andrews fakes out Coffey and Gibson, to then hop and boot Coffey! FMW comes around the corner, both he and Andrews wipe out Gibson and Coffey! FMW puts Gibson in and hits a moonsault! Cover, but Wolfgang breaks it. The ref reprimands Wolfgang but this is only proves to distract the ref. FMW hits Coffey but the GYV tag. Gibson and Drake work together, Mayhem in Motion! Gibson gives a stomp on the way out before Drake drags FMW up for haymakers. Drake rocks FMW out of the ring then tags back to Gibson. Gibson has FMW up, slingshot splash backbreaker combo! The Grizzled Young Veterans soak up the heat before putting FMW back in. Gibson scoop slams FMW hard then covers, TWO!

Gibson smothers FMW into a chinlock, and then shifts to a seated cobra clutch. Fans rally up for FMW as he fights up. But Drake tags in, and Gibson reels FMW out for Drake’s forearm! Drake stares down with Gallus while Cardiff calls him “Ass Face!” Drake scoops FMW up for another backbreaker! Cover, TWO! Drake drags FMW around to drive his knee in. Drake puts on another cobra clutch but FMW fights up as fans sing. Jawkbreaker! Coffey tags in and WOlfgang drags Drake out! COffey forearms then suplexes, but FMW escapes! FMW boost then enziguris! He crawls and shoves Mark away. Gibson tags in and throws Mark out. Gibson drags FMW away to throw EuroUppers. Wolfgang talks trash, and FMW goes up and over! Hot tag to Andrews! Andrews fires off on Gibson! Then on Drake! Gibson swings, misses, enziguri from Andrews! Andrews runs, victory rolls Gibson, but tornado DDT’s Drake! But Gallus wrecks everyone!

Wolfgang feeds Andrews but Andrews double PELES! The Welshmen FLY onto Gallus! Then they get back in to FLY onto GYV! Cardiff is thunderous as Andrews puts Gibson in. FMW knee triggers Coffey away! Then he helps Andrews 450! Cover but Drake breaks it! Drake throws FMW out then stomps Andrews. But FMW returns to Rude Boy Block the GYV! Gallus returns and Coffey tags off Gibson. Drake gets a double attack but Andrews gets run over. Coffey full nelson slams FMW, then double CHOPS Andrews! Tag to Wolfgang and Gallus gang up on Andrews. Catapult fireman’s carry, Samoan Drop! Wolfgang covers, TWO! Andrews survives but Gallus is still on him. They feed Andrews to a scoop, but FMW FLIES in! FMW takes out Coffey then boots Wolfgang. Andrews runs but is caught, but pops up, knee-trigger POISON-RANA! Cover, TWO!! Toast to 3 AM didn’t do it, but Cardiff is still cheering their boys and “NXT! NXT!”

Andrews goes up while FMW DIVES to take out Drake! But Coffey is saving Wolfgang while Gibson trips up and tags off Andrews. But Coffey is right on Gibson with a trip and a right hand. Coffey climbs up after Andrews while Wolfgang brawls with Gibson. Andrews resists and fights back. Andrews headbutts Coffey onto Gibson! Then he LEAPS onto everyone with a SHOOTING STAR! Cardiff is thunderous again for that insane dive! Andrews revives and drags Gibson up. Andrews puts Gibson in, and Gibson flounders. Drake anchors Andrews and Gibson clotheslines Andrews down! Gibson brings Andrews up, suplex, STUN-DOG MILLIONAIRE! FMW is up top, SWANTON!! Cover, TWO!! Gibson survives and shocks the Welshmen! But “WALES~! WALES~!” still echoes out.

Drake drags FMW out, Gibson has Andrews by the tights, TWO! Wheelbarrow, but into a corner, GRIT YOUR TEETH! The dropkick rocks Andrews and Drake goes up, Helter Skelter to a 450!! Cover, TWO!?! Cardiff is reaching a fever pitch for their hometown heroes! The Grizzled Young Veterans are shocked, but they have more to try. Drake returns to the corner to officially tag in. Gibson grabs Andrews and feeds him to Drake. Knee trigger stops Gibson! Drake rocks FMW, but a 2-for-1 headbutt takes the champs out! Those four men are down, but the two left are Gallus! Wolfgang sentons on FMW then feeds Drake to Coffey. Coffey tags before he CHOKE SLAMS Drake! Wolfgang wipes out Gibson then slingshot SPEARS Andrew! Gallus fires up, Coffey runs and Wolfgang TOSSES him onto everyone else! Wolfgang howls and even Cardiff has to admit that was great. Coffey puts Andrews in, feeds him to Wolfgang, pop-up, enziguri power slam!

FMW crawls in but is stomped down. Coffey covers, but FMW breaks free to break it! Cardiff is loving the heart but Gallus clobbers FMW down. They hit Gibson and Drake out but now a brawl breaks out. It’s a lot like NXT UK from Wednesday as the chaos ensues! Gibson, Drake, FMW and Andrews beat down Gallus! But Gallus explodes out! Catapult, DESTROYER!? FMW takes Coffey out! GYV wipe Wolfgang out with an Electric Chair DIVE! A tope suicida Doomsday!? Fans lose their minds over that one! “This is Awesome!” but far from over. The Welshmen and the Grizzled Young Veterans are the only two teams still standing. And the hometown heroes dare the champs to do something! Gibson and Drake slowly return as “WALES~! WALES~!” echoes out again.

Drake tags in off Coffey, and the GYV step through the ropes. They stand face to face with Andrews and FMW, and fans fire up! The brawl is on!! Gibson throws FMW out and Drake suplexes, DOUBLE STUN-DOG! FMW tags back in and Drake is down! FMW is up, 630!! Cover, but Gibson drags out the ref!! Gibson begs this not disqualify the match, but Andrews slingshots out! Gibson throat chops Andrews down! FMW clobbers Gibson, dodges Drake and hits a EuroUpper. But Gibson tags in, and Drake counters the tilt-o-whirl, throat chop, TICKET TO MAYHEM!! But they don’t cover yet, Drake has to DIVE and take out Gallus! But Andrews Falls to Pieces to take out Gibson! Andrews puts FMW on Gibson, CARDIFF WINS!!

Winners: Mark Andrews & Flash Morgan Webster, Webster pinning; NEW NXT UK Tag Team Champions

History has been made! The first ever Welsh champions in WWE history and it happens IN Wales! The party begins now! How long will it last?

 

Last Man Standing: Dave Mastiff VS Joe Coffey!

The Bomber of Black Country and the Iron King of Gallus went toe-to-toe after a Six Man Tag showdown. That match did not end in the ring, and it didn’t really end at all. So now, they will settle things in a match where you win when the other can’t even stand. Who will be the Last Behemoth Standing?!

But the moment Mastiff sees Coffey, he runs right up the ramp at him! Coffey swings his chain but Mastiff dodges to then throw big forearms! The bell rings and the brawl is on! Mastiff throws Coffey into barriers, then throws him into the ring. Coffey gets up fast to throw forearms, but Mastiff gives haymakers back. Mastiff rocks COffey from both sides, but Coffey comes back all the same! Coffey throws big body shots on the big body of Mastiff. But Mastiff fireman’s carries! Coffey escapes but Mastiff denies the whip. Mastiff whips Coffey hard, and the top buckle unbuckles?! Fans lose their minds and even Mastiff is shocked. But Coffey is down so the count begins. Coffey stirs as Mastiff isn’t sure what to do. Mastiff just figures he’ll use the buckle as a weapon now! No Disqualifications, so that includes the ring’s own pieces! Fans chant “E C Dub!” as Mastiff puts the bar in Coffey’s mouth, and slams him on the mat!

Coffey stands, but into a waistlock. Coffey fights Mastiff off, then runs corner to corner, but stops himself from hitting the other buckle, just in case. Coffey hops up on the second rope, but falls over as it doesn’t support him properly! Mastiff reminds Coffey of that other rope, as he grinds the bar in Coffey’s face! Mastiff grins as he brings Coffey up. Coffey throws big hands again, but Mastiff shoves him. Coffey manages to rebound on the ropes to fight back. Coffey clotheslines but can’t bring Mastiff down. But that saido suplex does! But not for long! Mastiff is up and waistlocks Coffey for a HUGE German Suplex! Coffey falls out of the ring and the ref starts counting. Coffey stirs at 3 but Mastiff is after him. Coffey tackles Mastiff into the apron! Then throws Mastiff into barriers! Coffey grabs a pool cue?! And jams it in Mastiff’s ribs! Coffey goes under the ring to bring out a bag labeled “Gallus”! And he dumps out a bunch of sports equipment?

Mastiff stands but Coffey tackles him down. A count begins but Coffey brings out a table! Fans really like that! Coffey brings the table over to the timekeeper’s area and props it up. Mastiff runs over and Coffey kicks him back. Coffey runs at Mastiff but is back dropped onto the sports equipment! Mastiff picks up the cricket bat, but Coffey ducks it! Coffey throws hands then brings up the cue again. He jabs and SMACKS it on Mastiff to break it! Then Coffey aims with the jagged piece. Mastiff stops that attack and clubs Coffey down. Mastiff has the cricket bat to SMACK Coffey on the back! Coffey is down but fans want “One More Time!” Coffey stands at 5 to get another SMACK! Mastiff sees the table Coffey provided, so he brings Coffey up and throws him over to it. Coffey flounders and Mastiff aims, but Coffey dodges! Coffey rolls and SPEARS Mastiff through the table!! The Glasgow Send-Off has fans cheering again!

A count starts on both men. Coffey stands at 6 and has his chain back. Mastiff is up at 8, and narrowly dodges that iron-clad All the Best! He waistlocks and Germans Coffey again! Another count, but Mastiff is up at 3. Mastiff stalks Coffey, who stands at 5. Mastiff takes that Gallus chain to LASH Coffey’s back! And LASH! And then Coffey’s ribs! Fans cheer “F him up, Mastiff, F him up!” And that Mastiff does as he again lashes Coffey’s back. Coffey hears the count again, but Mastiff brings out a new table! Coffey stands at 7 but Mastiff sets his table up on the other end. Mastiff takes a moment to fetch that chain, but Coffey has the other end. They tug-o-war, but Mastiff just says, “okay.” He lets go and Coffey falls! INTO THE VOID through the table!! Cardiff loses their minds again! A new count begins as both men stir. Mastiff sits up at 4 and stands at 6. Coffey crawls and drags himself up at 9! Then Coffey flops over to the front row.

Mastiff is in pursuit, and has a chair with him. He jabs Coffey then SMACKS him on the back! Fans want more, so Mastiff gives Coffey another SMACK! Mastiff lines it up again, but Coffey punches the chair shot away! Then an IRON All the Best for the Bells! Both men are down but Mastiff crawls away. The ring count climbs to 5, but Coffey stands at 8. Mastiff is up at 9, and dares Coffey to do something. Coffey drops the chain and Mastiff comes back with chairs. Mastiff gives Coffey one! Mastiff wants to do this like men! Coffey leads Mastiff deeper into the crowd and fires himself up. The two run like rams with those chairs, and COLLIDE! Both men tumble away from the impact and Cardiff is loving this! Another count climbs to 5, but both are up at 9.5!

Coffey falls over and retreats but Mastiff is still stalking him. Mastiff runs in but is sent into barriers! They’re right in front of commentary as Mastiff fights Coffey off. Coffey runs back in but is hip tossed into commentary! Fans chant “DAVE! DAVE!” as Mastiff hops the rails. Mastiff clears off the announce desk, then puts Coffey on it. Coffey sits up as Mastiff climbs up to join him. They brawl on the desk, and then Mastiff fireman’s carries Coffey, for a ROLLING SENTON on the desk! The desk stands firm but both men are wrecked! A count begins again and fans are loving this. The count passes 5 but Mastiff sits up at 7. Coffey is up at 8, both these men are superhuman! But Coffey wants to get away, so he climbs over commentary. But Mastiff follows with the steps, and says he’s not getting away so easy.

Fans chant “Please Don’t Die!” as the two brawl on that extra stage! Coffey fires off but Mastiff hits back! Mastiff goes to suplex but Coffey resists for dear life. Coffey hits back, and says “This is MY Kingdom!” But Mastiff headbutts, and they BOTH fall!! Fans lose their minds all over again as the two men crash through extra tables! The referee counts and both men struggle to rise. They drag themselves over whatever is around in a desperate attempt. Coffey kicks out Mastiff’s support! Coffey wins!!

Winner: Joe Coffey

The Iron King more or less survives this demolition derby with Dave Mastiff! But Gallus’ leader wins the day. Is this going to help Coffey climb back up towards the WWE United Kingdom Championship?

 

NXT UK Women’s Championship: Toni Storm VS Kay Lee Ray!

The Lightning From Down Under thought she had a friend joining her in NXT UK. But instead, the lethal lass says the reason they’re no longer friends is on Toni’s head. KLR claims to know Toni so well, but will she bring #ToniTime to an end? Or has her mind games only unlocked a part of Toni not even she knew existed?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we begin this golden grudge match!

Toni rushes KLR but KLR bails out. KLR won’t let Toni do things her way, but Toni watches KLR closely as they go around the ring. Fans sing, “F her up, Toni, F her up!” but KLR stays away. KLR toys with Toni as she goes in only to slide out. So Toni DIVES to take KLR out! Toni and KLR scrap and club away. Toni throws furious forearms off on KLR as the ring count climbs. Then she throws KLR into barriers! Toni puts KLR in and drags KLR up for underhooks. KLR slips out to SLAP! Toni just fires off back! Toni has KLR in the corner but backs off when the ref counts. KLR boots but Toni whips her to DECK her! Toni kicks away on KLR now, being more vicious than she’s been since joining NXT UK. The ref backs Toni off and KLR gets to the apron.

KLR shoulders then kicks Toni down. KLR stomps Toni around but fans continue to cheer for Toni. KLR chokes Toni on the ropes but lets up at the ref’s count. Toni gets to a corner but KLR bumps her off buckles. KLR CHOPS Toni, and follows her as she staggers away. KLR snapmares Toni to a seated stretch and neck wrench. Fans rally and Toni fights, but KLR throws her down. KLR kicks Toni around then drags her up. KLR suplexes for a gourd buster! Cover, TWO! KLR grows upset already, but she keeps on Toni with SLAPS! Fans boo as KLR slaps Toni all around the head. Toni sobs, but then she bobs ‘n’ weaves to hit back! Toni turns that sadness into fury and she rains down hands!

KLR kicks but Toni yanks her into a waistlock. KLR fights out and springboards but Toni saw that coming. Toni gets under, SUPERKICK to clothesline! Waistlock, BIG German Suplex! Toni runs to LARIAT! Fans fire up with Toni as she drags KLR off the mat. Toni underhooks, but KLR drops down and hits the legs. KLR slips around to chicken wing, but Toni makes it a DESTROYER! Cover, TWO! KLR survives but this is definitely not as easy as KLR thought it would be. Toni stands up and fans fire up with her again. But KLR cradle counters, TWO! KLR kicks Toni but Toni headbutts back! Toni underhooks, STORM ZERO! Cover, TWO!? KLR survives Toni’s best move and she can’t believe it! Cardiff is stunned silent themselves for a moment.

Toni kicks KLR and stands back up. Toni drags KLR up but KLR shoves her away. KLR SUPERKICKS! Then SUPERKICKS! Then GORY BOMB! Cover, TWO!! Now Toni survives KLR’s best! KLR is furious, but Cardiff rallies back up for Toni. KLR hobbles back over and drags Toni up. KLR hoists Toni to the top rope and then SLAPS her. KLR climbs, clubs Toni on the back, then goes for those underhooks. Toni fights back, and now she has KLR in underhooks! But KLR resists and fights Toni into a back drop! But Toni lands on her feet, And gets KLR with a SUPER GERMAN! Cover, ROPEBREAK! Toni can’t believe she didn’t account for that.

Toni kicks KLR in frustration until she’s out of the ring. Then Toni DIVES! The Lightning strikes, but she’s not done with KLR! Toni puts KLR in but KLR knees her back out! KLR goes to the corner, climbs up, and LEAPS! The cannonball takes both women out, but KLR still gets up first. The fans cheer for “NXT! NXT!” as KLR puts Toni in. Toni staggers but headbutts back. KLR mule kicks then chicken wings, for a Gory Hotshot! Then another chicken wing, GORY BOMB! Cover, KLR WINS!

Winner: Kay Lee Ray, by pinfall; NEW NXT UK Women’s Champion

The fans are shocked, but it seems even KLR surprised herself! #ToniTime ends in Wales as the K L eRa begins. How long with the lethal lass lead the NXT UK Women’s Division? What will it take for Toni to climb back up?

 

WWE United Kingdom Championship: WALTER VS Tyler Bate!

The most menacing champion in this title’s history takes on the prodigious and inaugural champion! Will the Big Strong Boy defeat Imperium’s fearsome leader? Or will the Ring General prove that this sacred mat is only for men?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and this battle for dominance begins!

Bate and Walter stare down as fans sing for Bate. Walter and Bate circle and feel out the grapple. They tie up and Walter powers Bate to the ropes. Then he swings a big hand, but Bate gets clear! Bate kicks then backs off. Fans chant for “Big Strong Boy!” as he circles with Walter more. They approach and lock up, but Bate rolls back to get the wristlock. Walter grabs Bate’s head but Bate gets to ropes. Bate gets free to kick at the leg more. The singing gets stronger as Bate and Walter tie up again. The two go shoulder to shoulder in a test of strength. But Walter brings the wristlocks up to lean on Bate. Fans still cheer and Bate bridges as Walter pushes him back. Cover, ONE! Walter drops on Bate, TWO as Bate bridges again! Walter struggles to keep Bate down as the cheering continues!

Walter backs Bate up but Bate turns things around to have Walter on the ropes. Bate gives Walter an elbow grind before backing off. Fans want Bate to “F him up, Tyler, F him up!” But Walter gets Bate and throws a forearm! But Bate gives big hands back! Bate kicks the leg but Walter headlocks to a takeover! Fans rally as Bate endures the grind. Walter cranks back but Bate fights his way up to his feet. Fans sing to troll Walter but Walter throws Bate down again. Walter cranks Bate’s head more, but Bate fights back up. Bate endures more grinding as he crotch lifts Walter! Walter fights that off but Bate throws body shots. Bate powers out but gets run over! Walter has Bate up fast, but Bate slips out of the bomb! Walter back drops out of the driver but Bate lands on his feet. Bate rams his shoulder in, then runs. Walter hurdles Bate, but Bate scoops Walter! To slam him down!

Bate rams his shoulder in and Walter is on the outside! Cardiff is thunderous while Walter is reeling! Bate strikes a pose, brother! Walter gathers himself before getting back in. Bate dropkicks Walter a few times, but Walter swats the last one away. Walter scoops but Bate holds on! Walter rams Bate into buckles, then scoops him up. But Bate slips out to huricanrana Walter out! Bate runs and DIVES! But Walter catches him, pops him off and CHOPS him with those monstrous hands! And then apron WALTER BOMBS Bate! Flashbacks to the Download Festival! Walter leaves Bate for dead while he rests in the ring. A ring count begins and climbs to 5, but Bate is up. Bate climbs in but Walter BOOTS him back out! Walter follows after but Bate throws hands. Walter swats Bate then throws him into barriers. Walter runs in to BOOT Bate almost over! Walter has Bate again, POST BOMB! Bate is wrecked all over again and Walter wants to leave him behind.

The referee checks on Bate but Walter cares more about the count. A medic checks on Bate as fans rally up. Bate says he doesn’t want to lose like this, and fans cheer him on. Bate rises to his feet and this match continues. Fans say “F you, Walter!” as the ring count begins. Bate stands at 5, but has to drag himself in at 7. Bate kicks from the mat but Walter just stomps him back. Walter kicks Bate around but fans rally and sing again. Walter drags Bate up for another scoop slam. The fans still sing as Walter kicks Bate hard in the back. Fans now boo and jeer, but Walter just ignores them as he drags Bate up. Bate can’t stand but he does kick from the mat. Walter stomps Bate more, egging Bate on. Walter drags Bate up and Bate throws body shots! Bate throws hands but Walter kicks him back down. Walter drags Bate up and clamps his hands on for a neck wrench. Bate endures but fans rally again.

Bate feeds off the energy, even as Walter thrashes Bate around. Walter smothers Bate with his weight but fans give Bate the strength to stand, only for Walter to kick him back down! Walter looms over Bate as fans sing both ways. Walter sits Bate up for clubbing forearms, and then wraps on a sleeper hold! Bate endures and gets to the ropes! But Walter breaks the break, only for Bate to get behind him! Bate clobbers Walter with a big left hand! Bate tries to fireman’s carry, but that bad back gives out! Walter falls on top of Bate and clubs away! Then Walter puts on a massive crossface hold! Fans rally yet again and Bate gets the ropebreak! Walter just puts Bate on the ropes to stretch him out and club his chest! And again, and again!

Bate flops out of the ring and to the floor, but Walter just waits in the ring. Fans boo Walter while Bate hears the count. The count passes 5 as Bate forces himself up. Bate stands at 7 and drags himself in just before 8. But Walter is right on him, stretching those arms out and stepping on Bate’s back! The fans cheer for “Big Strong Boy!” and Bate sits up. Walter grinds his knee in now, but Bate keeps standing up. Bate works against the stretch, but Walter headbutts him down to stop the turn. Bate keeps trying, and the fans are still with him. He goes to turn the hold again, and has it, only for Walter to turn it back. So Bate flips and kicks Walter away! But Walter comes back to fall on Bate! Cover, TWO! Bate still lives and it annoys Walter. Walter watches Bate sit up just to boot him back down. Walter drags Bate up for a CHOP! Bate crawls to a corner but Walter looms over him.

Walter drags Bate up to CHOP him down again! Bate still glares defiantly, so Walter stomps Bate in the corner. Walter eggs Bate on, so Bate CHOPS back! Walter still wants more so Bate CHOPS him again! But Walter CLUBS Bate down, then drags him up to ram him into buckles! Walter has Bate on the top rope and he CLUBS Bate! Walter climbs up to stand on Bate! Bate flops out to the apron and Walter goes out to join him. Walter grabs Bate and brings him up. He brings him in, but Bate holds ropes to save his life! Walter clubs Bate but fans chant again. Walter stands Bate up for forearms. Bate catches Walter, for an EXPLODER off the apron! Fans lose their minds as both men crash down! A new ring counts as both men start stirring. Bate is up first, and he goes after Walter again.

Bate rams Walter into the barriers, then the apron. He puts Walter in at 7, then drops on Walter’s back! And then again, and again! Bate headbutts Walter from the mat, then drags him up again. Bate throws EuroUppers, and fans fire up with him. Bate runs into the corner with an uppercut, and keeps Walter there. Walter blocks the whip to reverse it. But Bate boots and knees back. Bate hops up, to leap into a CHOP! Walter puts on a Boston Crab on Bate’s bad back! Bate endures as Walter sits deep, and powers his way up! But Walter puts a knee into Bate’s neck, then shifts to a crossface! Bate endures all this stretching and pulling, and still manages to crawl for ropes. Walter elbows Bate down, then makes the hold a Chancery! Bate still fights, slips out and gets the ropebreak! Walter lets go in frustration, but Bate keeps kicking from the mat.

Walter stands and looms over Bate. Walter stands Bate up to CHOP him down again. Fans have not given up on Bate, even as Walter circles Bate. Walter drags Bate up and goes to suplex, but Bate resists. Bate somehow holds Walter off, and the two start throwing body shots. Bate tries to suplex Walter, but that’s so much to lift! Walter spins out to CHOP Bate again! Walter suplexes Bate but Bate knees free. Bate tries again, and gets Walter up and over! Fans are on their feet for the Big Strong Boy’s big strong heart! The singing begins again and Bate stands. Walter follows but Bate is on him with hands. Bate EuroUppers and Walter staggers about. Bate runs, clotheslines, but Walter stays up! Bate tries again, still not enough. A third time, not yet! Bate tries a fourth, but gets rocked! Only to come back with the rolling kick!

Bate waistlocks, but Walter swings an elbow, only to end up in another EXPLODER! Bate somehow kips up!? And hits a standing shooting star! Cover, TWO!! Walter survives and Bate cannot believe it. “This is Awesome!” but far from over. Bate drags Walter up and wants the underhooks! But Walter resists, spins out and gives a EuroUpper. Bate gives one back, then turns Walter’s retaliation into a backslide! That he just flips over to underhooks! But Walter back drops out to deny the driver. Walter runs in, Bate goes up and over, but Walter dropkicks Bate in the back! Bate rebounds off buckles, into Walter’s powerbomb lift, only to make it a DESTROYER!! Cover, TWO!?! Walter almost lost for the first time in NXT UK! Fans cheer for “NXT! NXT!” again as Bate crawls his way to the apron.

Bate heads for a corner as fans declare “This is Wrestling!” Bate slowly climbs while Walter is still down. Bate reaches the top but Walter crawls to the apron. Fans boo but Bate just adjusts and stares down with Walter. They brawl, and Bate clubs Walter. Walter throws body shots and climbs up. Bate clubs him back, and sees where they are. Fans anticipate what’s coming, but Walter does, too. Walter fights and clubs back, then gets back to the apron. Walter CHOPS Bate off the top rope! Bate is in the drop zone and now Walter climbs up top. But Bate jumps up to headbutt! Bate fires up with the fans as he climbs up again. But Walter goes to chop, only for Bate to shout out the Bruiserweight! SNAP goes the fingers! SUPER EXPLODER!! Bate crawls to the cover, TWO!?! Walter still lives and Cardiff can’t believe it! Both men are down but fans are singing for Bate.

Walter sits up but Bate follows. Bate throws hands from the mat, showing that boxing training. Walter kicks Bate over but Bate kicks back. Walter CHOPS Bate, but Bate kicks a leg out! Bate tweaks the ankle, but Walter still stands. Walter throws a BIG forearm and Bate falls. But Bate is up again to throw hands! Walter CHOPS Bate, but Bate still rises! Bate throws more hands but takes another CHOP! How is Bate getting up again!? Walter doesn’t care, he welcomes Bate rising again. Walter CHOPS, but Bate grits hits teeth. Walter CHOPS and CHOPS, but Bate dodges. Walter sees through Bop to CHOP! But he still gets BANG! But then Walter falls on Bate’s body! It’s not a pin but Walter looks out cold! Bate gets free, and both men are down again.

Fans give another rally, and Bate feels his chest stinging. Bate and Walter can barely move, but they refuse to stop. Walter slaps Bate down but Bate kicks Walter. Walter forearms down but Bate drops a short elbow. Walter clubs, Bate CHOPS, and fans are still singing. The two men find the power to stand but Walter gives sumo palm strike! Bate fires off kicks on the leg, then dodges to rebound, into Walter’s Exploder! Cover, TWO!! Walter has had enough of Bate, powerbomb lift but scorpion kick! Bate tries, and somehow fireman’s carries Walter, for the AIRPLANE SPIN! They go around and around, but Walter grabs ropes to stop it. Walter climbs off but Bate kicks the legs! Bate has Walter stuck and just clubs away. Bate then brings Walter out on a torture rack, for a shout out to Trent Seven, with that BURNING HAMMER!! But Bate can’t cover, he’s too exhausted!

Bate crawls but Walter crawls to retreat! The fans hope they “Fight Forever!” at this point. Walter flounders about on the outside until he just topples over. Walter gets up again but so does Bate. Fans rally as Bate kicks Walter down! Bate runs, DIVES, and topples Walter over again! Bate staggers back into the ring and tries once more, and FLIES! Another direct hit, and Bate puts Walter back in. Walter is crawling and Bate is on him. Bate waistlocks, and deadlifts Walter for a German Suplex!! Bridging cover, TWO!! Bate won’t stop to wonder how Walter survives, he underhooks. But Walter back drops to a cover, TWO!? Underhooks, TYLER DRIVER ’97!!! TWO!?! No one knows what to make of this! Bate hurries up top, leaps, corkscrew senton! Cover, TWO?!? “This is Awesome” all over again, but what will it take to finish it?

Bate just forces himself to sit up while Walter stirs. The wrist tape comes off, and Bate wants Walter to stand. Bate starts throwing those hands! He has Walter reeling again, and in a corner. The referee reprimands Bate but Bate just fires off! The ref backs Bate off, Walter SLAPS and CHOPS and BOOTS! And into a sleeper hold with body scissors! Walter even rolls onto Bate’s back to smother him. But Bate again shows his Herculean heart as he stands up with Walter on his back! For a BACKPACK SENTON! But Walter rises like the dead to wrap back on! Bate is caught by the Austrian anaconda, but fights back up again. Cardiff gives Bate everything they have, and Bate uses the ropes to climb up, only for Walter to shove him out. Walter drags Bate up to club away, then put on a sleeper! But Bate drags Walter over with him!

Walter still has Bate in the hold, but Bate elbows free. Walter CHOPS Bate on the back! Sleeper Suplex to the apron!! The referee checks but Walter drags Bate in as fans lose their minds once again. Walter climbs up, LEAPING SPLASH! Cover, TWO!?!?!? This is insane! Walter sleeper holds, another suplex! Cover, TWO!! Walter just SLAPS Bate around, then hits the WALTER BOMB! High stack, ONE?!?! Just what is Tyler Bate?! Walter is in utter shock as Bate drags himself up, but then he CHOPS Bate again. Fans are going to lose their voices cheering for Bate. Walter runs to Clothesline from Hell! Cover, Walter wins!

Winner: WALTER, by pinfall; still WWE United Kingdom Champion

Walter has the toughest match in his NXT UK career, in this title’s history, and perhaps all of WWE 2019! And still, he reigns atop the UK brand. If Bate couldn’t dethrone him after all this, will anyone ever end the reign of the Ring General?

Imperium is there to greet Walter on the ramp. They all stand together, is it only a matter of time before Imperium completely takes over NXT UK?

As for Tyler Bate, fans still sing for this more-than-superhuman effort. And both Trent Seven and Pete Dunne come out to join him. British Strong Style still stands together, even in defeat. Fans cheer as Dunne and Seven help Bate get to his feet, and then cheers the trio. And the three of them salute with their mustache tweezing sign. Will British Strong Style ever again stand tall in the brand they helped build?

 


 

My Thoughts:

What an amazing event. NXT UK TakeOver: Cardiff raised the bar on all the rest of the WWE for 2019 and maybe even 2020 already. There was just so much to this. Dar VS Banks was a fun opener and yet it still ends up one of the lesser matches. I was expecting Banks to win but this makes good for Dar now that Dar is more dedicated to NXT UK. Then Cesaro VS Dragunov raised the bar on the entire show, it was such a great match that we got out of nowhere. I was just as surprised to see Cesaro win this match. I really do wonder if this means Cesaro will be sticking around for some UK tapings when he doesn’t have much on Raw or SmackDown to do. At the same time, Ilja has lost to both “Kings of Pro-Wrestling,” the team Cesaro and Kassius Ohno were on the indies. I dare to dream that Ohno and Cesaro will be reunited thanks to NXT UK to go for the NXT UK Tag Team Championships.

And speaking of, that Triple Threat for the tag titles was exactly what it should’ve been, especially with the hometown team winning. I knew that the only way to outdo the Cesaro-Dragunov match in action was to give the fans what they want in their hometown heroes winning, and that’s what happened. It is so great for Andrews and Webster to be the team that makes history like this, and I really wonder where things go from here. Same goes for KLR taking the title off Toni. That was about as expected, too, with a pretty good match that almost killed Cardiff’s enthusiasm. I think when KLR survived Toni’s finisher, the audience understood Toni wasn’t winning. KLR as champ freshens things up a bit, and we know that with Rhea Ripley in NXT USA being Face, it’s probably Piper Niven who wins the “post” UK TakeOver episode and then moves up to face KLR.

The Last Man Standing match was incredible. It was innovative using those less than likely sports equipment items. That cricket bat needs to be the equivalent of the sledgehammer for NXT UK. And then with them going through three tables, I was glad to see that very creative ending. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like taking out the support an opponent was using. Coffey winning might be to extend the feud, because I don’t see him fighting for a title after what we witnessed in the main event. That main event alone, of Tyler Bate being some kind of British superhero in real-life, is what helped TakeOver: Cardiff be this amazing.

Some might think this was too much, but I felt it was just right for Bate. Bate is the Big Strong Boy, the original WWE UK Champion, a perfect David to Walter’s Goliath, and for just a moment there, it felt like he was going to pull it off. But Walter still wins, and though that deflated the crowd for a moment, this feels like the right thing in the end. Dunne’s in NXT USA, and who knows, maybe Moustache Mountain’s destiny is still those NXT UK Tag Team Championships, after a new Heel team gets them. For all we know, maybe all of British Strong Style is going back to NXT USA in time for the live television premiere. Either way, I agree with the Cardiff crowd: #ThankYouTyler.

My Score: 9.7/10


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More From Japan

NOAH WEEKLY NEWSLETTER VOL.187 ~ 29TH SEPTEMBER 2022

Keiji Mutoh continues his Retirement tour and bringing out faces from the past! NOAH has a new champion! Interesting inter-promotional battles on the horizon as well!

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Kaito Kiyomiya is the new GHC Heavyweight Champion, nominates Kazuyuki Fujita as challenger

Following provocation by Kenoh not only saying that he was going to be the one to inherit Keiji Mutoh’s Shining Wizard and the memory of Keiji Mutoh himself (and the outright claim that Kiyomiya would simply forget about Mutoh once Mutoh had retired, which Kiyomiya didn’t even bother responding to), Kenoh went one step further at their last pre match on the 19th September by pulling Keiji Mutoh’s pose, kissing his hand, putting it to Kiyomiya’s lips and then exploding it. Kiyomiya erupted in fury at this, it was far more than any verbal provocation of Kenoh’s, which I guess he has learned to ignore over the years. They fought for the GHC Heavyweight in Nagoya on September 25th, with Kiyomiya emerging victorious following a modified Shining Wizard. As Kenoh left it was like a spell was broken. Kenoh went backstage and muttered about Kiyomiya being the company favorite and in his interview the day after winning the title, Kiyomiya said nothing about Keiji Mutoh. Mutoh as we know had been a focus of both Kiyomiya and Kenoh leading up to the title match.

Back in the ring, Kiyomiya called out his next opponent. Kazuyuki Fujita. Fujita came to the ring, carrying a can of beer which he swigged from. Getting in the ring he circled Kiyomiya and took off his t-shirt. Kiyomiya said that he was expecting a fight, but Fujita did something that no other NOAH wrestler had (or perhaps would) do, and that was to throw himself at Kiyomiya and then make nuzzling motions against his head, while he licked the belt. Kiyomiya pushed him off, and Fujita retaliated by pouring beer over his head.

Kiyomiya screaming that he hated beer was met with Fujita toasting him from the ramp and yelling “Kampaiii” (“cheers”) after a fight had broken out, and Kiyomiya threw him from the ring.

 

Backstage, Kiyomiya said his reason for nominating Kazuyuki Fujita as his challenger was that he had never been defeated for the GHC Heavyweight. Fujita had to give up the belt due to Coronavirus. It has been a recurring theme of most of the GHC Heavyweight champions since Go Shiozaki, that Fujita has been the man to beat in order to cement yourself as champion. Kiyomiya was picking up that torch.

As for Fujita, he played it as if he was a Casanova and had been asked out on a date by warning Kiyomiya that when you experience Fujita, you can never go back because you were never going to be the same. He was going to “make it a night to remember”. He sipped his beer, and licked his lips afterwards.

Title match has been set for NOAH’s return to Ariake on the 30th October.

STINGER lose, NOAH Junior Regulars win, enter Tadasuke (with a chair)

Following a period of brutal attacks on Seiki Yoshioka (by the end of the match he could hardly use one side of his body) and a title challenge where Atsushi Kotoge was bloodied up, The NOAH Junior Regulars emerged victorious and bought the tag titles home to their unit. They had very little time to celebrate their win and put ice on their wounds, when Tadasuke burst in and attacked Atsushi Kotoge with a chair while Hi69 beat up on the already incapacitated Seiki Yoshioka. Tadasuke (wild grin on his face) got on the microphone and made a challenge for the tag titles. Then Tadasuke wiped the blood from Kotoge that had got on his hands on his hair, leaving red streaks in the peroxide. Tadasuke was even waving the bloodied seat of the chair, which had detached during the attack, around backstage.

Title match will be on the 30th October when NOAH return to the Ariake complex.

Takashi Sugiura and Satoshi Kojima, NOAH’s most dysfunctional tag team, win the GHC Heavyweight tag titles

It must be said that with the combined efforts of Satoshi Kojima and Hideki Suzuki, we almost have our Sugi back.

At the press conference/title match signing, Sugi and Kojima appeared dressed in suits and wearing dark glasses. They looked something between The Men In Black and “Dangerous Detectives” (as Tokyo Sports called them  which stems from a Japanese TV show). Hideki Suzuki was on form, not only mistranslating Timothy Thatcher and stating at one point that Thatcher said he came to Japan to “beat you up” and being rude to a journalist for being overfamiliar with his “punk mouth”, the highlight of the press conference was his long close up stare at Sugi, who was trying not to laugh.

The dysfunctional team won the titles in Nagoya on the 25th September, and despite their falling out during the match, Sugi actually gave Kojima a proper handshake. Then they went back to squabbling backstage over Kojima talking on the mic when it was Sugi who got the win. No challengers have come forward as of yet.

HAYATA retains the GHC Junior, Ninja Mack makes his long awaited challenge

It had been an emotional match for YO-HEY, and for fans. Cutting out the aerial techniques that had characterized their earlier matches, both he and HAYATA demonstrated how much they had both evolved by concentrating on a more NOAH based ground attack with submissions. YO-HEY might have failed in the challenge, but he had at least gotten one win over HAYATA in the pre-match. He knew the title match would be different and he would need to level up, and afterwards he reflected and said he would start from rock bottom in order to make his next challenge. What fans had noticed that while things had changed between them, some things were the same, such as YO-HEY coloring his hair, his tongue (and even his boxer shorts) purple, which is HAYATA’s color, and HAYATA not speaking as much as he has done in previous title challenges, as he is content to let YO-HEY talk. After the match, Ninja Mack came to challenge. HAYATA accepted by saying, that he was “finally interested in the belt” and acknowledging him as challenger. Title match will of course be on the 30th October. But HAYATA is not immediately going into a fallout match with Ninja Mack at NOAH’s next event on the 30th, but is having a tag match against YO-HEY.

Keiji Mutoh’s Retirement Road

Keiji Mutoh has been very busy.

– 23rd September: Great Muta appears in AEW

The Great Muta made a surprise appearance in AEW to rescue Sting, who had been tied to a chair by Darby Allen. Muta came to the ring, advanced on Sting and then turned and spat green mist into the face of Allen and then reunited with Sting. Keiji Mutoh announced that Sting would attend Muta’s retirement on the 22nd in Yokohama, but has not said in what capacity, although it is assumed that they will tag. Regarding any further appearances in America, Mutoh said he didn’t think it was likely, but did warn that The Great Muta may pop up somewhere as you never knew where he would turn up next.

– 25th September: Keiji Mutoh Retirement Road: Love Forever 2

Keiji Mutoh teamed with his junior Kazuyuki Fujita to take on Mutoh’s classmate, Masakatsu Funaki and Katsuhiko Nakajima, who Mutoh has known since he was a boy, and still calls affectionately “Katsuhiko”. Nakajima said he was going to break up this class reunion, and while Mutoh did get kicked (Nakajima smirked and said it was fun when Mutoh later complained his leg still hurt) but it was Fujita who got the worst of it. During the match, Nakajima pulled out Mutoh’s Space Rolling Elbow. Mutoh was initially not pleased, but then he became very happy to see it and said that he thought that “Katsuhiko” did it because he had some small measure of feeling for him. I think had Nakajima been a more acrobatic wrestler, Mutoh might have handed it to him. Mutoh won the match with The Shining Wizard, pinning Nakajima. This was Mutoh’s farewell to Nagoya, his classmate, his junior and Nakajima.

– 26th September: Hiroshi Tanahashi comes to the press conference and a tag match is announced

Hiroshi Tanahashi presented 38 roses to Mutoh when he came to the press conference. Each rose symbolizes a year of Mutoh’s career. Mutoh joked that he should have laid them at his feet, as had happened in boxing recently. Tanahashi said he wasn’t good at ad-libbing, and then introduced himself as “one of the greatest New Japan talents in the past one hundred years”. During the press conference, a tag match was announced. New Japan’s Hiroshi Tanahashi, Togi Makabe and Honma Tomoaki will team together against the team of Naomichi Marufuji, Keiji Mutoh and Keiji Mutoh. This will take place on the 30th October. Mutoh has not given up hope of appearing one final time in the New Japan ring.

– 16th October: A new match is announced

NOAH announced that due to fan demand, Keiji Mutoh will be appearing in Fukuoka. He will tag with Ninja Mack and Satoshi Kojima against Naomichi Marufuji, HAYATA and Jack Morris. Satoshi Kojima is of course connected to Mutoh through All Japan and New Japan, Naomichi Marufuji has wanted a match against Mutoh (he will be tagging with him as we know on the 30th October) and HAYATA has been a big fan of Mutoh for a while, as he has influenced a lot of his style and persona. HAYATA thinks of himself and The Great Muta as “The Phantom Team”. Muta doesn’t like to speak and HAYATA said, neither does he.

Naomichi Marufuji and Katsuhiko Nakajima head overseas

Naomichi Marufuji and Katsuhiko Nakajima will appear for Evolution Pro Wrestling in New York for their anniversary show on November 12th. Marufuji’s match is yet to be announced, but Nakajima will take on Josh Alexander. Alexander has said he wonders how Nakajima is going to kick after he snaps his ankle. They will also appear at King of Indies in San Francisco on November 19th.

NOSAWA vs Katsuhiko Nakajima (and Kenoh)

After being beaten up by Katsuhiko Nakajima who gave him some pretty stiff soccerball kicks outside the ring at Korakuen Hall recently, (although he would tell you that Nakajima tried to beat him up), NOSAWA Rongai has been on a quest to face Nakajima in a match. Then he threw in Kenoh, so it could be himself and Eita versus Kongoh. Hideki Suzuki told him that he was probably going to die, but NOSAWA has taken no notice and kept on with his demand. His demand has not been met because rather than facing Nakajima and Kenoh, NOAH have booked him against rookies Yasutaka Yano and Kai Fujimura. NOSAWA thinks he is having to go through some kind of trial.

ELSEWHERE IN NOAH

– Hideki Suzuki has hinted that perhaps Takashi Sugiura might like to get back online.

– Yoshiki Inamura and YO-HEY continued their guild, despite the fact that YO-HEY said someone attacked and burned their castle down. A picture was taken of YO-HEY and Inamura playing the game, with YO-HEY seated cross legged on Inamura, who was doing a bridge in the ring. We have seen Inamura used as a weight, but is he now used as furniture?

– NOAH’s Director, Narihiro Takeda, wrote on a NOAH Note that he would like for Darby Allin to come to NOAH one day.

– Tadasuke got a match thrown out by ripping off Alejandro’s mask. Tadasuke did not care, and did not even respond when Alejandro asked if he wanted a mask for himself?

– Daiki Inaba had his long awaited singles match with Katsuhiko Nakajima, but failed to revenge himself for Nakajima’s behavior in W-1. Nakajima even went for the cocky pin by grinning and leaning on Inaba.

– There was usual chaos at the NOAH Junior Space sessions as Daisuke Harada is not there to take control. Atsushi Kotoge seems to be the main culprit, forgetting to invite Seiki Yoshioka in and at one time even failing to press record.

– It’s probably best that Daiki Inaba, who apparently likes to be in the nip backstage, was not present when NOAH was at Differ. It was bad enough that Sugi used to wander around naked…

– Mitsuharu Misawa wrote in a diary entry for 2006 about filming an advert for THE LEAVE, and having to sing first thing in the morning while they were filming. Probably due to the fact that he had a problem with his throat anyway, was a heavy smoker and had taken “so many chops and kicks” to it in his career, he said he sounded very hoarse.

EVENT RECAPS AND POST MATCH PROMOS

SUNNY VOYAGE – September 19th 

Event recap

Post match promos

N-INNOVATION – September 21st 

Event recap

Post match promos

GRAND SHIP 2022 IN NAGOYA/KEIJI MUTOH RETIREMENT ROAD – September 25th

Event recap

Post match promos

CURRENT CHAMPIONS

  • GHC Heavyweight Champion: Kaito Kiyomiya
    Challenger: Kazuyuki Fujita, [Muto Retirement Road] ABEMA presents Ariake Gaisen-THE RETURN-PRO-WRESTLING LOVE FOREVER . 3 ~TRIUMPH~ Sunday 30th October, Ariake Arena, Tokyo
  • GHC Junior Champion: HAYATA
    Challenger: Ninja Mack, [Muto Retirement Road] ABEMA presents Ariake Gaisen-THE RETURN-PRO-WRESTLING LOVE FOREVER . 3 ~TRIUMPH~ Sunday 30th October, Ariake Arena, Tokyo
  • GHC Heavyweight Tag Champions: KojiSugi (Satoshi Kojima & Takashi Sugiura)
    Challengers: TBA
  • GHC Junior Tag Champions: The NOAH Junior Regulars (Atsushi Kotoge & Seiki Yoshioka)
    Challengers: Kongoh Juniors (Tadasuke & Hi69), [Muto Retirement Road] ABEMA presents Ariake Gaisen-THE RETURN-PRO-WRESTLING LOVE FOREVER . 3 ~TRIUMPH~ Sunday 30th October, Ariake Arena, Tokyo
  • GHC National Champion: Masakatsu Funaki
    Challenger: Masa Kitamiya, SUNNY VOYAGE 2022 – Friday September 30th (Bandaijima Multi-Purpose Square Ogama)

(This event will not be broadcast live, but hopefully this match will be shown via Instagram)

THIS WEEK IN NOAH

(October 2022 schedule)

– Friday, October 7th

STAR NAVIGATION 2022 – Korakuen Hall, Tokyo

Time: 18:30 JST

Broadcast: WrestleUniverse/ABEMA (live)

– Saturday, October 8th

STAR NAVIGATION 2022 – Korakuen Hall, Tokyo

Time: 18:30 JST

Broadcast: WrestleUniverse (live)

Note about broadcasts

Unless you are living in Japan or have a VPN you know is compatible with ABEMA, please do not subscribe to the service. For fans living outside of Japan, a subscription to WrestleUniverse would be better as they show more NOAH shows than ABEMA, and usually the events get uploaded very quickly. ABEMA broadcasts are only in Japanese, you can only watch them live, and this is the only NOAH they show. They do not broadcast old shows as these belong to Samurai TV.

BIRTHDAYS & ANNIVERSARIES

Wednesday, 5th October: Keiji Mutoh debut anniversary (38)

Wednesday, 5th October: Seiki Yoshioka debut anniversary (14)

LINKS

“I want to protect this belt for the rest of my life”, new GHC champion Kiyomiya holds morning press conference to establish a new NOAH landscape

Mutoh’s Retirement Road, tag match against Tanahashi in round three: “I want to grab the secret of secrets”, Tanahashi presents 38 roses

Great Muta teaming up with Sting for last match? “Agent” Mutoh’s opinion 

“I wonder if I can transmit more” YO-HEY aims to revitalize the junior ark with his first championship

AEW Shock! Great Muta appears in America! Rescues Sting and shake of hands

“Follow Me You Bastards” – Kenoh’s Weekly Pro Column

GHC Junior Match Signing: YO-HEY “Last Chance, I don’t think as my ex partner now”, HAYATA “I don’t feel anything”

“Taka & Satoshi” reveal a “dangerous detective” look, mischievous Suzuki is a reckless interpreter, the GHC tag signing ceremony is thrown into chaos by bizarre question and answer between the two teams

 A “Comrade” and an “Older Brother”, Masakatsu Funaki talks about his thoughts on Mutoh’s retirement, “I want to kick him mercilessly”

BOOK CORNER

“Donmai, Donmai” – Mitsuharu Misawa’s diary

With thanks to: Metal NOAH

GIF taken from WrestleUniverse & NOAH Official YouTube

Picture credit: YO-HEY & NOAH.co.jp


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Andrew’s IMPACT Wrestling Results & Match Ratings: 9.29.2022

Bound for Glory is 8 days away, but Victory Road just happened. What kind of show do we get with some fallout and penultimate hype?

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Victory Road just happened, but Bound for Glory is like 8 nights away? You know I forgot that it was such a quick turn around. That makes tonight weird, since there’s some fallout, but then there’s gonna be a lot of table setting for Bound for Glory.

This episode could be awful. The last week or so haven’t exactly set the world afire, so I’m curious if the highlight really is just gonna be the Monster’s Ball with Masha and Allie Katch.

*insert joke about possibly gagging and balls and Swinger’s Dungeon*

Ratings:

  • Bullet Club (Ace Austin & Chris Bey w/Juice Robinson) vs Trey Miguel & Laredo Kid: Bullet Club win via Finesse & Fold – **
  • IMPACT Digital Media Championship: Brian Myers (c) vs Crazzy Steve: Myers retains via Roster Cut – ** 1/2
  • Delirious vs Black Taurus: Black Taurus wins via Destination Hellhole – ** 1/4
  • PCO & Vincent vs Rich Swann & Heath: Rich wins via Phoenix Splash – ** 1/4
  • Pick Your Poison: Monster’s Ball Match: Masha Slamovich vs Allie Katch: Masha wins via Russian Death Device – *** 1/2

Results:

Bullet Club (Ace Austin & Chris Bey w/Juice Robinson) vs Trey Miguel & Laredo Kid

I don’t think I could care less about this match if I tried. Trey and Laredo are worthless. Laredo has eaten so many terrible losses and Trey is just bad. If the BC Juniors don’t win…I will really question the booking.

My biggest takeaway early is the commentary tries to put over Trey “turning heads”. No he doesn’t, he is legitimately hard to watch and everything that Will Ospreay did wrong in his early career; is basically Trey, but with less personality. Oh did you expect play by play? They isolate Laredo, decent tandem attacks, when Trey comes in it’s bad offense typical Cruiser garbage with laughable facials and body language.

Just typical crap with Trey. Were there some cool high spots? Sure. Do I care? NOPE.

IMPACT Digital Media Championship: Brian Myers (c) vs Crazzy Steve

Steve starts with some of his quirky mat wrestling, Arm Wringers into Drop Toe Holds and face biting. It shocked Myers early, but he takes a small shortcut and starts trying to slow down the psycho from Decay. Steve bounces off the ropes and Myers does his sliding trip move before commercial.

Back from commercial, Snapmare from Steve and the neck twister into some corner offense of Hip Attacks and Sentons for 2. Myers dodges King Kill 33, lands a few pot shots, Implant DDT for 2. Into the corner, face bite, Upside Down, after the rope break Myers grabs the referee to block Steve. Eye Poke, Roster Cut, AND STILL…

Simple, but entertaining. Plus it continues Myers’ arrogant, full of himself for absolutely no reason persona. Oh and he offers up an Open Challenge for Bound for Glory. Maybe Bobby Fish? Someone new? Could be interesting. 

Delirious vs Black Taurus

Delirious is between gibberish and Stone Cold early on while they’re just trading shots. Delirious twists the Nose Ring…in the mask…and Taurus sells it momentarily before stomping the foot and decking him. This is just a weird match. I mean we all know Delirious is weird, but he’s not all comedy; and Taurus is supposed to be legit-ish.

Admittedly, with the exception of Victory Road, it has been years since I’ve watched a Delirious match. So the level of ridiculousness has hit Toru Yano levels, especially after the 10 count Leg Drops. Taurus powders, comes back in, Shoulder Tackle, Blackhole Backbreaker into a Samoan Drop. As soon as Taurus looks in charge, Delirious throws together a combo, eats a Headbutt and then Destination Hellhole.

Sheesh okay after 2 interview segments we get to Honor No More’s victory celebration segment. Just a lot of talking and inaction, so this just goes to feed that weird feeling I had coming into the show because of the timing. Eddie does the usual thing where hates on PCO and accuses him of being the weak link, which is a smart story angle since the fans tend to like PCO’s gimmick and this makes him more sympathetic to casual observers. 

Oh good Taven is talking nowWait did I just say that? DAMN YOU IMPACT! Made me like Matt Taven. Maria stirs the pot a little saying that Eddie is a better wrestler than Josh and Moose…by the implications. 

Thank God, Josh Alexander finally breaks up the segment with…more talking. Okay never mind. Jesus since the end of the Delirious match it was like 15 minutes before Josh finally charged the ring and threw down a bit with Honor No More. Rich Swann and Heath make a bit of the babyface save for Josh, but the numbers are still on Honor No More’s side. Oh MCMG come down in a tracksuit and dress clothes! Someone wasn’t ready to be doing a run in.

PCO & Vincent vs Rich Swann & Heath

Well isn’t that convenient that four of the men in the donnybrook were supposed to be in a match anyway.

Rich uses his quickness to try and stay ahead of PCO, but PCO cuts him off in the corner into the Corner Hung Codebreaker, then the leaned against the ropes Leg Drop thing. Vincent throws together a T-Bone Suplex into a Flatliner and keeps the vibes flowing on Rich Swann.

PCO clears out Heath, but PCO’s hand gets stuck in the ropes. Vincent eats a flip kick and the Phoenix Splash while PCO and Heath are brawling on the outside after the rope issue with PCO.

Pick Your Poison: Monster’s Ball Match: Masha Slamovich vs Allie Katch

Haymakers and Headbutts start things off as they both hit the ropes and lay out one another with dual clotheslines. Trash can lid duel, Masha gets first contact, but Allie blocks and returns 3 shots. German Suplex from Masha into whipping her with a chain, some choking and then general pulling with the chain in Katch’s mouth or around her eyes. Katch claws at Masha’s eyes to try and get some space.

Headbutts and Biting from Masha as Allie tries to power out of a Bow and Arrow. More chain choking…I’m not sure if this is a wrestling match or BDSM prep at the moment. Ahh Masha needs more Cowbell but Allie cuts her off with a trash can lid. Allie tries a Piledriver through a door, but Masha turns it into an Air Raid Crash into the opposite corner.

Commercial break, and Allie is getting choked again. Spots get a little redundant, slams, chokes, and blood. OHHH – it’s a “Use the Door” chant. I thought it was – nah – I won’t say what I thought it was. Chairshot from Masha misses, but a Snap Suplex from Masha onto the chair gets some usefulness. Straight Right to the gut and an Axe Kick allows Masha to hit the Death Valley Driver onto the propped up chair. Masha goes back to biting after it was only 2. Allie cuts off Masha going to the top, Superplex onto the trash can lid, into a Death Valley Driver through the door – but Masha kicks out.

Allie tries a Piledriver on the apron a few times, but Masha blocks. Masha tries for the Release German to the floor but Allie holds on. Dazed strikes, bites and then a Russian Leg Sweep through the table lays both out for a short time. Masha grabs a black bag, it’s gotta be tacks for Monster’s Ball. Masha eats a few tacks for good show, picks up Allie but Allie fights. Piledriver into the tacks from Allie, only 2. Allie opens a trash can, and empties a bunch of cut up soda cans. Hits Masha with the can, Masha fires, Spinning Heel Kick and then Russian Death Device into the pile of tacks and cans.

Overall Score: 6.25/10

The main event was pretty good, maybe even a little better than I gave it credit for; I’m just sick of seeing some crazy hardcore match so often from Impact. It feels like its weekly, and that’s too damn much. Trey is terrible, and that’s a hill I’m willing to die on. He sells poorly, he doesn’t tell a story with his wrestling and he looks like an idiot pretending to be something he isn’t; and that’s talented.

Myers is fine with his classic delusional heel style, Delirious gave a bit of a rub to Taurus so I’m guessing he’s probably next up in the X Division. But a straight 15 minutes of interviews and talking is just too damn much especially when the surrounding wrestling isn’t very good or hearty enough to help people tolerate talking time.

I do however love Joe Hendry. So…yeah. There’s always some quirky gimmicks that just resonate well with me, and this is gorgeous.

All in all, decent enough; though next week could be a real banger of a Go Home.


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