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Mitchell’s Women of Wrestling Results & Report! (11/9/19)

The Diamond finally feels the pressure!

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WoW Season 2

The predator is hungry!

After weeks and weeks of Tessa Blanchard dodging and ducking, the Queen of the Splash gets her chance! Will karma finally catch up to the Born Legend?

 

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • The Beast VS Faith the Lioness w/ Lana Star; The Beast wins.
  • Serpentine w/ Sophia Lopez VS Princess Aussie; Serpentine wins.
  • WOW Tag Team Championship Series: The Monsters of Madness VS Sassy Massy & Chantilly Chella; The Monsters of Madness win and advance to the championship match.
  • WOW World Championship: Tessa Blanchard VS Jungle Grrrl; Blanchard wins and retains the WOW World Championship.

PLAY BY PLAY

Previously on WOW…

Jungle Grrrl and The Beast have been denied a chance at Tessa Blanchard’s title again and again. JG got a win with some controversy, but Sophia Lopez and Lana Star put the Lioness in the way. The pawns put up good fights but the Born Legend remains THE WOW World Champion. But the alpha predator would get her hands on Tessa, and now gets her shot! Will Tessa finally face what’s been coming to her?

 

Welcome BACK to WOW!

And The Beast heads right to the ring and grabs herself a microphone. “Lana Star! You cost me my title shot. I’m calling you out, and I’m going to make you pay.” So get out to the ring right away! But nope, Lana and Faith the Lioness are watching backstage. The Beast warned Lana before, but now she wants to confront Lana in front of everyone. Will anyone go out to respond to the biggest and the baddest while she’s her maddest?

 

Lana Star and the Lioness DO go to the ring!

And the Fabulous Star wants to “make something perfectly clear.” Lana warns The Beast NOT to get at her like in the parking lot. But Lana has an injury, so she can’t wrestle. Lioness will kick The Beast’s but instead! And Beast will see why you never underestimate Lana again! The Beast is fine with that! Just get in this ring so she can have her fight. The Lioness leaps in and we have a match!

The Beast VS Faith the Lioness w/ Lana Star!

The bell rings and fans are thunderous already. Lioness and Beast tie up, they go around, and Beast beils the Lioness away. Then she beils her the other way! Then a kick low and bomb position! Beast lifts Lioness, BEAST BOMB! Cover, Beast wins!!

Winner: The Beast, by pinfall

That was a record setting win for WOW! The biggest and the baddest really is all that and more, and she has some semblance of payback. Will this teach Lana a lesson the Lioness will never forget?

 

Princess Aussie awakens.

But where is she? The shore, from back home. There is something… changing in her. The Voodoo Dolls, Siren and Holidead, have something to do with this, don’t they? Rebirth… Nikki Krampus crushed Aussie in defeat but then Aussie was abducted. Her bamboo stick bundle was burned! Her symbol of hope and strength was gone, but the Voodoo Dolls kept a close eye on her. And to everyone’s surprise, when the Voodoo Dolls needed someone to help against the Psycho Sisters, it was Princess Aussie that appeared! The Voodoo Dolls won that match to move on in the WOW Tag Team Series, proving that their darkness was stronger than the Psycho Sisters’ derangement. That darkness is covering Princess Aussie now, but what does it mean? Perhaps we find out tonight!

 

Serpentine w/ Sophia Lopez VS Princess Aussie!

The slithering snake may have set up the former Kobra Moon, to give Tessa Blanchard an “easy” win, but she doesn’t leave her clients out in the cold. Serpentine gets another match to climb her way back up, but what of Princess Aussie? No tribe, no bamboo sticks, is there no more light inside?

The bell rings and fans rally up as the two circle. Serpentine hammerlocks then facelocks but Princess spins out to a hammerlock of her own. Serpentine spins around to get the facelock again, and gives Aussie’s arm a snake bite! The ref reprimands but Serpentine lets up to yank on the arm. Serpentine puts Princess in a corner and pulls hair, the ref counts. Serpentine stops at 4 to whip but Princess goes up and around to sunset flip! ONE, and Serpentine whips but Princess reverses. Serpentine dodges the clothesline but not the dropkick! Cover, TWO! Princess drags Serpentine around and runs, but Sophia trips her up! Serpentine runs to SLAP Princess! Sophia pulls Princess’ hair while the ref reprimands Serpentine! Serpentine drags Princess up and Sophia plays innocent. Serpentine kicks Princess on the back then drags her up for a snapmare. Serpentine grabs the arms for the Bow ‘n’ Arrow surfboard.

Princess endures and fans rally up. Serpentine shifts to a chinlock but Princess bridges up to relieve pressure. Serpentine slams Princess down, then covers, TWO! Serpentine clubs away and then locks up the legs, another Bow ‘n’ Arrow! But Princess pops out, covers, TWO! Serpentine kicks Princess then drags her up. Serpentine bumps Princess off buckles and pulls on hair as she gives rabbit punches. The ref backs Serpentine off, but she comes back to trip Princess up. Serpentine grinds her boot in and Sophia even pulls on hair from behind. The ref reprimands but Sophia thrashes Princess around! Serpentine whips corner to corner then runs in, back elbow! She whips the other way, then runs in, but Princess dodges! Princess runs in but is put on the apron. Princess counter punches then hops in, hops up, leaps into the DROPKICK!

Fans are thunderous as Serpentine covers, TWO! Serpentine keeps her cool as she stomps Princes down. Princess hits back but Serpentine clubs her down. Serpentine drags Princess up to have a little taste. Fans sing as Serpentine drags Princess up onto her shoulder, but Princess lands on her feet out of the front slam! Princess dodges, forearms and backs Serpentine down! Princess goes side to side, forearm smash! LARIAT! Princess kicks low then snapmares hard, basement lariat! Cover, TWO! Fans duel as Princess drags Serpentine up. Princess whips but Serpentine reverses, tilt-o-whirl backbreaker! Double stomps! Cover, TWO!! Princess Aussie survives and Serpentine argues but the count is the count. Serpentine drags Princess up, whips corner to corner again, but Princess elbows back! Princess boots Serpentine away, and then climbs up top! But Serpentine stops her with a haymaker! And tosses her down!

Serpentine aims from the corner as Princess writhes and rises. Serpentine gets her in the scoop, spinning Serpentine Driver! Cover, Serpentine wins!

Winner: Serpentine, by pinfall

The Queen of Snakes gets a win thanks to the Greatest Attorney in the World, but will she earn herself a second chance at the championship fair and square?

As for Princess Aussie, the Voodoo Dolls appear again! They slither their way into the ring and have those burnt bamboo sticks! Fans boo and Princess Aussie has no idea what this is about. Siren and Holidead leave, but when will their plan be made clear?

 

WOW takes a closer look at Shaul Guerrero.

The one and only WOW ring announcer, Shaul is also the daughter of Eddie Guerrero, and therefore is the third-generation talent of the Guerrero family. Ever since being born, she was around wrestling. She didn’t realize how big her family was in wrestling until she tried it herself. Her first bump showed her everything about the blood, sweat and tears literally behind every moment. It was when her father passed that she thought she could try it. Wrestling is her connection back to the late great Latino Heat. Eddie is watching and is surely proud of her finding her place.

Shaul enjoys being an announcer for WOW, because she gets to be on air every week, every match, on every screen around the world. There is female empowerment that is long overdue. As a tattooed, curvy Latina, Shaul wants to inspire women and young girls into believing they can be a success just like her.

 

WOW Tag Team Championship Series: The Monsters of Madness VS Sassy Massy & Chantilly Chella!

This is it! Consider this the semifinals of the series, because only one team moves on to face both the Voodoo Dolls and the red hot team of Adrenaline & Fire in the championship match! Havok and Hazard are ready to destroy all, but the party girls just want to have fun. But will the party be over after running into this dark and dominant duo?

The bell rings and we start with Hazard and Chella. Fans are ready to party, “Whoop whoop!” and Chella dodges Hazard. Chella dances but Hazard runs at her. Arm-drags through Hazard around and the dropkick takes her down! Chella hurries to bring Hazard over, tag to Massy. The party girls whip and drop toehold to a Sassy Massy senton! Double elbow drops on the back and Massy covers, ONE! Massy goes at Hazard but is put in a corner. Massy runs out to splash Hazard and tags in Chella. The party girls work together, Massy whips Chella for the corner wizard! Fans fire up as Chella rolls Hazard and runs at her, but she dodges one clothesline only to get the LARIAT from the left! Hazard roars and drags Chella over to tag Havok.

Havok stomps Chella down then thrashes her about by her purple hair! And beils her while she’s at it! Havok is having her own kind of fun as she drags Chella up. Havok full nelsons and lifts to bend and thrash Chella more. When Chella refuses to quit, Havok gives her a half nelson backbreaker! Into a LARIAT! Havok drags Chella up and over to tag in Hazard. Hazard grins as she snap suplexes Chella then covers, TWO! Hazard hits Massy for good measure, and then Havok gets cheap shots on Chella while the ref keeps Massy back. Hazard stomps away on Chella, too, a real monstrous mudhole. Tag to Havok and she soaks up the heat. Havok hauls Chella up for a bearhug, and then rams her into buckles! And corner to corner! Havok squeezes tight but fans “Whoop whoop!” only for Havk to SPINEBUSTER! Cover, TWO!!

Havok drags Chella up to tag Hazard and Hazard rams shoulders into Chella over and over. Hazard brings Chella up but Chella fights back! Chella runs and dropkicks Hazard down again! Hot tag to Massy! And she clotheslines Hazard down! Then corner to corner, back bump, and then basement crossbody! Fans are fired up but Havok is in. Massy dodges, but leaps into her arms! Chella adds on but Havok has them both! Double Fall Away Slam!! The Monster is running wild and fans are fired up! Massy is up and moving, dodging, wheelbarrow, CUTTER from Hazard! Cover, the Monsters win!

Winners: The Monsters of Madness, Havok pinning; advance to the championship match

The Triple Threat is complete, and it just got even scarier! Fire & Adrenaline, the Voodoo Dolls, and now Havok & Hazard! Only one team can win it all, and Shaul asks how the Monsters of Madness feel about the Triple Threat Elimination match for the titles. Havok takes the mic to say, “What did I tell you was going to happen? The Monsters of Madness are here to annihilate everyone!” Shine those belts up good for them now, because the Monsters will pin both those teams, one-two-three! Is it just a matter of who lasts longest against this destructive duo in next week’s title match?

 

WOW World Championship: Tessa Blanchard VS Jungle Grrrl!

The Born Legend has been able to get around the far more worthy contenders of WOW, until now! The richest prize in all of women’s wrestling” is now around the waist of The Diamond. These two women have passions that are flames that will not be put out, but only one can burn bright in the spotlight! So much has happened between these two since Tessa arrived, and it may all come to an end right here! Who will truly, finally and without question be THE Women of Wrestling World Champion!?

The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and this grudge match practically an entire season in the making begins!

Tessa and JG step face to face but Tessa pie faces. JG shoves Tessa down! JG rains down hands but Tessa gets away! JG gives chase and they brawl by the barriers! JG knocks Tessa down, stomps her around and throws her into a post! Then brings her up again to throw into the wood steps! JG puts Tessa in and revels in all the noise. But JG gets in for Tessa to fire off! Tessa kicks and punches and CHOPS! Tessa whips corner to corner, then runs in, but JG elbows her away. JG hops up but Tessa kicks the legs out! Tessa has JG but JG fights back with elbows. JG shoves Tessa away, slips out and leaps for a clothesline! And then a dropkick! JG covers, TWO! Tessa is up, JG whips, then follows but Tessa elbows back! Tessa snarls as she throws haymakers! Tessa whips JG into ropes, then runs to elbow her into those ropes!

Tessa brings JG up for forearms to the back against those ropes. Tessa runs to dropkick JG into those ropes now! Then hops out to the apron to kick JG in the face! Cover, ONE! Tessa is already frustrated with JG as she drags her up again. Tessa wrenches, hammerlocks but no DDT yet! JG rams Tessa into a corner then rams her shoulder in again and again! Then uses a suplex to hoist Tessa up top! JG climbs up but Tessa fights back. The two struggle for control, Tessa forearms JG down. Tessa leaps, but has to roll through as JG dodges, JG SPEARS! Cover, TWO!! Tessa survives but JG is on her already. JG scoops, but Tessa slips out to half nelson, spin-out facebuster! Tessa goes to the top rope herself now, but JG is right on her with forearms! JG climbs up, fans are thunderous as they duel, and from the very top, SUPERPLEX!

Both women are down but JG is crawling. She covers Tessa, TWO!! Tessa survives but JG is not stopping! She brings Tessa up but Tessa throws a haymaker. JG hits back, but now it’s a brawl! They go back and forth, Tessa wobbles and JG kicks her back. JG scoops, JUNGLE DRIVER! But JG doesn’t cover, she goes to the top rope. JG wants to finish this her way, but Tessa rolls out of the ring. That doesn’t stop JG, she just waits for her to come close. JG leaps, into a SUPERKICK! Fans lose their minds as Tessa puts JG in to cover, TWO!! JG still lives and Tessa is snarling, but fans know “This is Awesome!” Tessa drags JG up, wrench and hammerlock, DIAMOND DDT!! Cover, TWO!?! HOW?! Tessa is shocked that her best move wasn’t good enough! Tessa is desperate, she goes up again. She aims, waits for JG to stand, and then leaps, FLYING CODE BREAKER!! Cover, Tessa wins!!

Winner: Tessa Blanchard, by pinfall; still WOW World Champion

And the biggest thing about this: it was clean! No one interfered in any way, Tessa didn’t need to use sneaky tactics, and there wasn’t controversy in that pinning situation. Tessa comes away with the title, is she finally the alpha female of WOW?

 


 

My Thoughts:

A really good episode for WOW! I really liked all the moves made tonight. Beast squashing Lioness was actually great, she is rolling towards a future title match. Serpentine gets a great win out of a pretty good match with Princess Aussie, but now things get interesting with Aussie and the Voodoo Dolls. They have yet to say outright what they want, but if Princess Aussie doesn’t show up in a new, darker outfit sometime during next week’s title triple threat, I will be disappointed. And I really liked the vignette we got for Shaul Guerrero. For fans who know the Guerrero family’s history, it’s great to hear from her what that was like and how much it means to her, and even fans who didn’t know any of that, it still makes Shaul really relatable. I know she’s a ring announcer, but I feel it would be great if at some point, she gets to have at least a part in a match.

The tag championship series match tonight was a lot of fun. I knew right away the Monsters would win, Massy and Chella just aren’t there yet, but they put up a good fight. The Monsters are now the true Heels of that title match, Adrenaline & Fire are the true Faces, so the Voodoo Dolls are definitely Tweeners. They’ve fought Heels like the Psycho Sisters but Faces like Princess Aussie herself, too. A dark Tweener Princess Aussie still needs to join in, I would love to see her help the Voodoo Dolls win in a way that keeps the other teams strong since it wouldn’t be clean. Then that WOW World Championship match, for just under 10 minutes, WOW did great again packing in so much. I really thought they were going to make a point of Jungle Grrrl’s toe touching the bottom rope, but it seems that might’ve just been a (minor) mistake of positioning.

But with JG out of the way, it sounds like Beast is building her way towards her own match with Tessa to be the one to take that title. It would be great to close the season with that match and Beast taking the title, but in a 15+ minute match so there’s room to breathe. The second season finale needs to basically chop the time available into three segments, so that the tag titles, the world title and some kind of huge grudge match, perhaps a Six Woman Tag of Psycho Sisters VS Princess Aussie and Voodoo Dolls, that all go about 15 minutes or so. The titles are the more important ones, though.

My Score: 8.4/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (5/10/24)

This tournament is phenomenal!

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SmackDown’s brackets are set!

The King & Queen of the Ring tournaments began on Monday Night Raw, and they continue here on SmackDown! But will AJ Styles use the crown to redeem himself from Backlash? Or will there soon be a King Viper?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Queen of the Ring: Naomi VS Nia Jax; Nia wins and advances.
  • King of the Ring: Carmelo Hayes VS Baron Corbin; Melo wins and advances.
  • Queen of the Ring: Jade Cargill VS Piper Niven; Jade wins and advances.
  • Queen of the Ring: Bianca Belair VS Candice LeRae; Bianca wins and advances.
  • King of the Ring: Tama Tonga VS Angelo Dawkins; Tama wins and advances.
  • King of the Ring: Randy Orton VS AJ Styles; Orton wins and advances.

PLAY BY PLAY

Nick Aldis is in the ring.

“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to SmackDown live from a sold out Mohegan Sun Arena in Wilks-Barre, Pennsylvania!” The fans fire up for that! Aldis continues to say there are huge King & Queen of the Ring matches here tonight, but before that, please welcome the Undisputed WWE Champion, the American Nightmare, Cody Rhodes! The fans fire up and sing along with the song, “WHOA~ OH~!” Cody gets his pyro then gets the fans even more fired up before going down the ramp and to the ring. Cody shakes hands with Aldis, gets himself a mic, and hears the fans chant his name.

Aldis tells Cody congratulations on the successful defense against AJ Styles at Backlash. Never a small feat getting your hand raised against the best of a generation. But now, we turn our attention to the KQOTR event in Saudi Arabia. And Aldis knows Cody well, has heard him say it, and knows it already: Cody is a fighting champion. Cody wants to defend against the very best as often as he can. That said, Aldis brought Cody out here tonight to let him know his next challenger has already been determined. And Aldis thought there was no better time to introduce him than right here and now.

We all turn to the ramp to see… LOGAN PAUL!? The Mohegan Sun Arena rains down boos on The Maverick United States Champion as he makes his way out here. Logan shakes Aldis’ hand, then steps into the ring with Cody. United States Champion circles with Undisputed Champion before getting himself a mic. The fans continue to boo Logan but Logan doesn’t let that bother him. Cody speaks first, “So… Logan Paul.” Logan wants to hear that again. “So… Logan Paul…” The fans boo harder each time, and Cody says he already knows what Logan wants to talk about.

Logan says yes he does, brother! Main eventing the KQOTR PLE, Champion VS Champion with THE Cody Rhodes. It will truly kick off the Logan Paul Levesque Era! The fans boo and chant “LOGAN SUCKS! LOGAN SUCKS!” Cody tells Logan that Champion VS Champion is a challenge he certainly likes. Because the fact is, holding not one but two- Oh, see, that’s the thing, Cody. Facts don’t care about feelings, and neither does Logan. And here’s some facts: Logan Paul, not Cody, is the longest reigning champion in the WWE. He is the greatest attraction in this company. He had the greatest rookie year of all time. And Logan is a superstar.

Logan saw that there’s a fan with a birthday today. Congrats, Isaiah, you met a superstar, and his name is Logan Paul. Happy Birthday! But hey, Cody’s great! He’s a superstar, too! Yeah, Cody won the 2023 Royal Rumble. But what does everyone remember from that night? Logan Paul’s viral midair collision with Ricochet, The Crash Seen ‘Round the World! And yes, Cody won at WrestleMania 40, but what was everyone talking about that night? Logan, IShowSpeed, and Prime. Logan’s brand, Logan’s ideas, Logan’s moment. And look who’s taking all the credit. See, three years ago, another fact: Cody and Logan both debuted at Mania.

The fans chant “PRIME SUCKS! PRIME SUCKS!” and that annoys Logan. Logan says Prime has 20 calories and two grams of sugar, so shut up, Pennsylvania! The fans boo more but Logan has more facts for the “virgin inbreds.” These two men came to WWE on the same night. And since then, Logan’s been the fuel for the rocket ship that is the WWE. So his question for Cody is: how can Cody #FinishTheStory when it isn’t even his story? So what’s Logan gonna talk about? Him knocking Cody out on top of his logo, walking out as THE WWE Champion! The fans still chant “LOGAN SUCKS!” but Cody takes a moment.

Cody bets a lot of people standing across from Logan just assume, “What a dumbass.” The fans cheer that! As fun as that would be, he won’t call Logan a podcaster, YouTuber, outsider, influencer, any of that. It isn’t just a fad for Logan, Cody’s gotten a sense for who Logan really is, and so have the fans. Logan went toe-to-toe with Floyd Mayweather. Made Forbes’ 40 Under 40. And Logan won the United States Championship. But since we’re all going over facts, the fact is, if Cody were to win that US Championship, that’d make him a Grand Slam Champion! The fans like the sound of that!

Logan lifts his mic but Cody stops him! Cody says he is not done. In addition to all the positives that Logan is, Logan is also disrespectful, self-centered, delusional, and cannot go a single match without using brass knucks! And Logan is out here taking credit for something that doesn’t belong to him, or to Cody. This right here is a team! And at the KQOTR event, Logan will find out where he stands on that team. Cody lifts his title high, but so does Logan. Who will be the one man that holds them both at the end of this?

 

Backstage interview with AJ Styles.

Kayla Braxton is with the Phenomenal One and brings up his first round match with The Viper, Randy Orton. How prepared is he feeling? Before that, Styles wants to talk Backlash. How Styles had Cody on the ropes, had him beat, and Cody knows it. Lyon, France knows it. That’s why they were doing the chants and the singalongs, all to distract Styles. Mission accomplished. It should be Styles facing Logan and defending that title. But just know this: Cody, the next time you and Styles meet, Styles WILL beat you. And Styles will earn another title match, and that starts tonight. Winning King of the Ring is a Phenomenal Step in the right direction.

Styles heads out, he didn’t even mention Randy by name. But will that only earn him an RKO outta nowhere and right outta the tournament?

 

Queen of the Ring: Naomi VS Nia Jax!

Speaking of falling short for a title, The Glow felt some of that at Backlash in that Triple Threat. But likewise, The Irresistible Force has been just out of reach of a title herself. Who will step over the other to step closer to the throne?

SmackDown returns and Nia makes her entrance. The bell rings and the two stare down. The fans rally up, Nia pie faces Naomi, so Naomi SLAPS back! Naomi fires forearms, Nia shoves her away then CLOBBERS her! Nia dribbles Naomi off the mat, then she drags Naomi up to whip to a corner. Naomi hits buckles hard, Nia soaks up heat, and Nia runs up to SPLASH! Nia TOSSES Naomi away, then soaks up more heat. Nia runs in again to SPLASH, and then she shoves Naomi down. Nia runs to drop an elbow! The fans rally for Naomi but Nia kicks her around. Nia stands Naomi up, puts her in another corner, then runs in again, but Naomi dodges!

Nia is caught in ropes, Naomi KICKS the leg, a QR code pops in, and then Naomi CHOP BLOCKS Nia! Naomi headlocks to BUCKLE BULLDOG! Nia staggers away, comes back, but Naomi dodges to POST her! Naomi sees Nia tumble out, then she builds speed! Naomi DIVES and sends Nia into barriers! Naomi then fires hands, but Nia shoves her into the apron! Nia fireman’s carries, SAMOAN DROP to the floor! The fans boo while Naomi is down, and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again and Nia grinds Naomi with a cobra clutch! Naomi fights up and JAWBREAKERS free! Naomi KNEES Nia, ROCKS her, then ROCKS her again! But Nia HEADBUTTS Naomi down! The fans boo but Nia motions wearing a crown. Nia brings Naomi up, hangs her out to dry, then HEADBUTTS her down again! Naomi tumbles to the floor, but Nia soaks up the heat. Nia wants the ring count and it begins. Nia counts along with a lot of sass, but Naomi sits up at 4 of 10. Nia tells the fans to kiss this while we pass 5, but Naomi is on the apron. Nia storms over, Naomi HOTSHOTS her!

Naomi slingshots up and over, but Nia stays up! Only for Naomi to avoid the hip drop! The fans fire up while both women are down! Naomi rises again, the fans rally up, and Naomi fires forearms! Naomi whips, Nia blocks! Nia whips, but Naomi slides under! Naomi LARIATS but Nia stays up! Naomi runs to UPPERCUT but still Nia stays up! Naomi springboards, FLYING CHUCK! Nia drops to her knees and the fans fire up! Naomi feeds off that energy and springboards again, but Nia catches her! But Naomi slips out to the apron, ROUNDHOUSE, and then she reels Nia in through the ropes! HEATSEEKER!

Naomi hurries up to the corner, SPLIT-LEG MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Nia survives and Naomi is frustrated. The fans rally up as Naomi and Nia rise, and Naomi headlocks again. Nia shoves her to a corner, but then Naomi dodges the splash! Naomi forearms Nia, then hoists her up the corner! The fans fire up this feat of strength! Naomi goes up after Nia, but Nia HEADBUTTS! And HEADBUTTS! And then clinches, brings Naomi up, and SUPER- STEINER!! Naomi turns things around and hurries to cover, TWO!! Nia survives and the fans are thunderous! Naomi and Nia both catch their breath, and Naomi rises first.

The fans rally, Naomi waits on Nia, then SUPERKICKS! Nia wobbles, into another SUPERKICK! Naomi runs up, but buzzsaw becomes POWERBOMB! Nia flips Naomi over to run and LEG DROP! Nia then puts Naomi in a drop zone, steps on her to go up the corner, A-NIA-LATOR!! Cover, Nia wins!

Winner: Nia Jax, by pinfall (advances to the next round)

Naomi’s Queen of the Ring hopes were just literally crushed! Nia says she will be queen, will no one be able to stop her?

 

Baron Corbin shows off his shave.

Of his head, that is. Byron Saxton steps over to interview The Lone Wolf, welcoming him back to the blue brand. How has Corbin changed things up since he was last on SmackDown? Corbin says so much has changed. Things weren’t going his way back then. He was lost and confused. Was he a king? A constable? Happy or sad? He went back to NXT, found himself again, and is going to wreck shop as himself. IT will be a grind, but… Then in steps Carmelo Hayes! Melo sarcastically congratulates Corbin on getting called up. When did he get Drafted? Melo must’ve missed it. Oh, Melo’s got jokes, huh? Well, with a head that big, it’ll be an easy target.

Corbin says here’s some advice, but Melo tells him to save it. The last guy that tried that isn’t even in the tournament anymore, all at the thought of Melo running circles around him. So here’s some advice for Corbin: do what Bobby did, and pull out now. Because tonight, Melo is running circles around Corbin. Corbin can’t believe Melo’s attitude. Will Corbin find a way to humble… HIM?

 

King of the Ring: Carmelo Hayes VS Baron Corbin!

The former NXT Champion took his shot at Cody Rhodes, and yeah, he missed. But now he’s taking aim at the throne, and taking on a former King of the Ring to start off! Will Melo hit the game winner and move on to the next round? Or will the Lone Wolf take a big bite out of… HIM?

The bell rings and the two circle. Melo avoids Corbin, circles with him again, then jukes again! Melo waistlocks, Corbin bucks the O’Conner, but Melo ducks ‘n’ dodges the big shots to dropkick the legs out! Melo then Eddy Gordo Kicks! And he SLAPS Corbin’s bald head! Melo talks trash, but Corbin DECKS him! Corbin DECKS Melo again, puts him on ropes and body shots! Corbin follows Melo to a corner, then reels him in for an ELBOW! Corbin ELBOWS Melo again, hauls him up to back suplex, but Melo lands out! Only for Corbin to FISHERMAN BUSTER! Cover, TWO! Corbin has control while Melo bails out, and SmackDown goes to break!

SmackDown returns and Corbin throws down ELBOWS on Melo in a corner! Fans count all the way to TEN, but then Melo fights the superplex! Melo slips out the bottom, YANKS Corbin down, then springboards for the FLYING LARIAT! Melo runs up and tilt-o-whirls, LA MYSTICA! Cover, TWO! Corbin is still in this but Melo dares him to get up. Melo aims from the corner, runs up, but into a fireman’s carry! Melo fights with elbows, slips free, and shoves Corbin away. Corbin swings, Melo dodges, but runs into DEEP- NO, Melo slips fere of that one! Only to run back into the fireman’s carry! DEATH VALLEY DRIVER!

Corbin isn’t done, he suplexes for the SHEER DROP BRAINBUSTER! Cover, TWO!! Corbin maybe got a little lax in the pin, but the fans are all fired up! Corbin storms over to Melo in a corner, then puts him back up top. The fans rally for Corbin as he throws hands. Melo kicks Corbin away, to hit the FIRST 48! Melo then resets, runs up, V-TRIGGER! Melo goes up top, Corbin rises, NOTHING BUT- NO! Corbin avoids the three pointer to then clinch and CORNER URENAGE! Then a LARIAT! Corbin hauls Melo right up, suplexes, ANARCHY CUTTER! Cover, TWO!! Melo survives but Corbin reels him right in! Only for Melo to slip free again! Cradle, MELO WINS!!

Winner: Carmelo Hayes, by pinfall (advances to the next round)

Corbin was about to dunk on Melo, but Melo steals the ball to score instead! And if Melo can do that to a former King of the Ring, is it inevitable that WWE will crown… HIM?

 

Backstage interview with Bayley.

Kayla is now with the WWE Women’s Champion and says tonight is SmackDown’s start in the Queen of the Ring Tournament. Does The Role Model have a particular favorite to win? Bayley says there is a lot of talent in this tournament, but she is interested to see how far Jade Cargill can go. Before Bayley can say more, Chelsea Green & Piper Niven walk over. The Hot Mess says, “Ooh la la~! Clearly, the stench of France has made you lose your mind, because you forgot about Miss Piper here. But we have to go, Piper’s about to kick Jade out of the first round of the tournament. Au revoir!”

Chelsea blows mocking kisses, Piper eyes Bayley up and down, then they both leave. Will the Scottish Viper, a former WWE Women’s Tag Team Champion, be able to weather the storm that the current WWE Women’s Tag Team Champion is bringing?

 

Backstage interview with Randy Orton.

Byron is now with The Viper, and says many are looking at Orton as the favorite to win the KOTR. However, some are also saying the same about his opponent in this opening round, AJ Styles. What’re Orton’s thoughts? Orton says that there is a lot he has accomplished in his tenure in the WWE. But one thing he hasn’t done is become King of the Ring. Now, he like everyone else, all the guys in the back, all the fans out there, know how great AJ Styles truly is. But, man oh man, it feels phenomenal when he hits Styles with an RKO. So stay tuned. Orton then thinks of one more thing. He’s reminded of something. This is for Tama Tonga.

Last week, Tama took out Orton’s friend and teammate, Kevin Owens, at Backlash! The Bloodline took Kevin out! And has Orton forgotten about that? Oh no he has not! Orton sees the bracket, that Tama is safe on the other side of SmackDown’s bracket, but something tells him that they will path cross. And when they do, it won’t just be an RKO for Tama. No, no, no. Orton will do everything in his power to make sure Tama sees it coming! The Good Bad Guy has been warned, but will Orton get through Styles to make good on it?

 

Queen of the Ring: Jade Cargill VS Piper Niven w/ Chelsea Green!

The storm that hit the WWE Women’s Division brought about NEW WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions at Backlash, but now, forces of nature are colliding here in the opening round of the tournament! Who will still be standing at the end of this to head for the throne?

The bell rings and the fans rally up as the two circle. They tie up, are in a deadlock, and break. They circle again, tie up, and are in another deadlock. They break again, talk some smack, and the fans fire up. Jade runs, RAMS Piper, but Piper stays up. Piper smiles but Jade dares her to try. Piper runs, RAMS Jade, and the fans fire up again! Jade and Piper talk some more smack, Jade runs, but ducks the lariat to run Piper over! Piper gets up, Jade whips, but PIper reverses and ELBOWS Jade! Jade stays up so Piper reels her in to scopo! Jade slips free, and SUPERKICKS! Jade roars, runs in at Piper, but PIper catches her to SPINEBUSTER!

Piper scowls, and SENTONS! Cover, TWO! Jade withstands that damage but Chelsea coaches Piper up. Piper kicks Jade around, stomps her, then hauls her up. Piper SLAPS Jade right down, then stalks her to ropes. Piper CHOKES Jade, Chelsea laughs at her, but the ref counts. Piper lets off, so Chelsea SLAPS Jade! The fans boo but Piper hauls Jade up. Piper scoops and SLAMS Jade, then dusts herself off. Chelsea taunts the fans for cheering Jade, but Piper hauls Jade up again. Short arm LARIAT! Jade falls over, but Piper drags her back up. Short arm LARIAT! Jade falls again, Piper flexes, but the fans boo.

Piper stands Jade back up, but Jade blocks the lariat! The fans fire up as Jade fires forearms, but Piper HEADBUTTS! Both women wobble, Piper runs, but Jade gets around to BLUE THUNDER BOMB! Cover, TWO!! Piper survives and Chelsea is panicked! Jade scowls, the fans rally up, and Jade runs in at the corner. SPLASH! Jade keeps going, to SPLASH again! Jade wants a third but Chelsea stands in the way! So Jade DECKS her! The fans are thunderous, but then Piper swings on Jade! Jade gets around, chicken wings, but Piper powers out to HEADBUTT! Piper runs in at Jade to SPLASH in return!

Piper sits Jade down, goes corner to corner herself, CANNONBALL! Cover, TWO! Jade survives that hit, too, and Piper isn’t sure what to do now! Chelsea stands back up, she tells Piper to finish this! Piper puts Jade in a drop zone, goes up and up, but Jade gets up to YANK her down! Piper staggers, into a BOOT! Jade hurries to chicken wing! JADED!! Cover, Jade wins!

Winner: Jade Cargill, by pinfall (advances to the next round)

Chelsea is losing her mind over Piper losing in the first round, but now Jade steps forward… to take on the Irresistible Force! Talk about forces of nature! Will Jade bring that storm right to Nia’s front door and then head for the throne?

But then here comes Jade’s teammate! The EST is also in this tournament, will the strongEST duo dominate? Or will the Poison Pixie make her way to the throne?

 

Shinsuke Nakamura speaks.

“My art is not just to compete. It is to conquer, to captivate. And to destroy ALL who dare stand against me in the ring. Because I am here to claim what is rightfully mine: The pinnacle of SmackDown. And now that I am here, no one is safe. The Master of Strong Style does not just plan to rise, I plan to reign supreme. So watch closely, because everything on SmackDown is about to change. And it will never be the same again.” Is that a not so subtle hint that Nakamura is looking to write a sequel with The American Nightmare?

 

Queen of the Ring: Bianca Belair VS Candice LeRae w/ Indi Hartwell!

SmackDown returns as Candice makes her entrance, Indi Hartwell with her. The bell rings and the two circle. The fans rally, but Indi already takes as swipe! Bianca avoids being tripped up, and she still runs Candice over! The fans fire up as Bianca runs, then handsprings over Candice’s dropdown! Bianca eggs Candice on, bypasses her, but Candice BOOTS back! Only to swing into chicken wings! Candice victory rolls free to send Bianca out! Candice goes to the apron, FLYING- NO, Bianca stops the rana to SWING Candice into barriers! Indi is stunned but Bianca puts Candice in the ring. Candice distracts the ref, Indi CHOP BLCOKS Bianca!

Candice drags Bianca up but Bianca stops the cradle! Bianca suplexes Candice up to hold, then SLAM! The fans fire up and Bianca RAMS into Candice at the corner! Bianca goes up, rains down fists, and the fans count along, only for Candice to slip out at 7! Candice grab a leg but Bianca kicks her away! Bianca then backflips up and over, only for the leg to jam! Candice dropkicks that leg out, then BUZZSAWS! Cover, TWO! Bianca is still the toughEST, but clearly Indi’s influence is being felt. Candice HAMMERS away on that leg, then SMASHES the knee! Indi smiles and nods while Candice stalks Bianca.

Candice grabs the legs, but Bianca kicks. Candice CLUBS the leg, Bianca still kicks, and Bianca kicks free! Candice runs up, but into a scoop! FALL AWAY SLAM! The fans fire up again and Bianca stands. Bianca gets Candice up, suplexes again, but Candice slips free! CHOP BLOCK! Candice uses Bianca as a step for the SENTON! Candice goes to ropes, but Bianca brings her off the ropes! Torture rack, KISS OF DEATH! Cover, Bianca wins!

Winner: Bianca Belair, by pinfall (advances to the next round)

It was basically a Handicap Match, but Bianca still wins out! Bianca will have to wait for Mia Yim and Tiffany Stratton to fight it out on this weekend’s “Supershow,” but will she be ready for whoever comes her way?

 

The Bloodline is backstage.

Tama Tonga fires himself up for his match tonight, with Tonga Loa and Solo Sikoa both stoically standing by. Paul Heyman walks in, they all look at him. The Wise Man just wants a moment alone with Solo, so Solo excuses The Guerillas. Fans can be heard chanting “WE WANT ROMAN!” while Heyman says he knows his place in life. Heyman is Roman’s Wise Man. But Solo, you are making decisions- Oh, so Heyman decided to lie about pulling Roman from the WWE Draft? Yeah, that one backfired on them all. Because of that mistake, The Bloodline was drafted late in the third, when they should’ve been number one overall.

Solo says it’s like Heyman is trying to take money out of Solo’s pocket. Is Heyman trying to do that? No, not at all! IS he trying to take food from his kids? He wants Solo’s kids to starve? No! Then what about last week? Heyman walked past Jey, did he try to give some kind of signal? Some kind of look that he needed help? No…! Solo understands Heyman is the Wise Man, just trying to protect Roman and The Bloodline. But he hasn’t spoken to Roman since he lost their title at WrestleMania, right? R-Right. Well, Solo has. What?! And Solo says until Roman comes back, Solo is in charge, he calls the shots. That makes Heyman Solo’s Wise Man, “by orders of the Tribal Chief.”

Solo asks for a hug. Heyman brings it in, and Solo says he loves Heyman. Solo glances at The Guerillas, is this the new hierarchy here in The Bloodline?

 

Andrade speaks.

“I am a third-generation luchador. My destiny is here in the WWE. The Era of Andrade El Idolo has begun.”

 

King of the Ring: Tama Tonga w/ The Bloodline VS Angelo Dawkins w/ The Pride!

The Good Bad Guy was more than ready to fight The All Mighty, but an unfortunate injury during training has changed things. But The Curse of Greatness is ready to be that next man up! Will Dawkins look to go from a Profit to a king? Or will nothing stop The Bloodline from taking another throne for their own?

SmackDown returns as The MFT makes his entrance, The Bloodline backing him. The bell rings and Tama fires off hands! The ref counts as Tama stomps a mudhole, but lets off at 4. Tama then comes back to SPLASH! Dawkins staggers around, Solo applauds, and Tama fires haymakers and knees! Tama keeps on Dawkins in another corner, fires body shots, but the ref counts. Tama lets off at 4, the ref reprimands, but Solo smiles. Tama goes corner to corner, but Dawkins avoids the splash! Dawkins JABS, JABS, JABS, then LARIATS! And LARIATS again! Dawkins whips, Tama reverses but Dawkins hurdles! And UPPERCUTS!

The fans fire up with Dawkins, he runs corner to corner, CYCLONE SPLASH! Then ENZIGIRI! Dawkins keeps moving, blows past Tama, then POUNCES! Tama flops out of the ring and the fans fire up again! But then Solo stands in the way! So Dawkins DECKS him! The fans fire up and Ford FLIES onto Solo & Loa! The fans are thunderous, but Tama returns! Only to run into a SKY HIGH!! Cover, TWO!! Tama survives and Dawkins is stunned! Loa gets up to POST Ford! Loa & Solo drag Ford up, SAMOAN SPIKE!! Dawkins is worried for Ford , but Tama uses that to COMPLETE SHOT!! Cover, Tama wins!

Winner: Tama Tonga, by pinfall (advances to the next round)

The fans boo as The Bloodline screws over Dawkins. Heyman reluctantly holds up the one with them, but Solo isn’t done! He drags Dawkins up, and gives him a SAMOAN SPIKE!! The fans boo more and even Heyman is in shock! Solo and his enforcers head out, will they stop at nothing until they stand atop the WWE?

 

King of the Ring: Randy Orton VS AJ Styles!

We’ve heard from The Viper and The Phenomenal One tonight, and both men are looking for redemption after taking losses at Backlash. They’ve picked themselves up, dusted themselves off and refocused on what’s next, but who is the one taking that next step forward while the other gets left behind?

SmackDown returns and Orton makes his entrance. He signs a fan’s magazine cover before he gets in the ring with Styles. The bell rings and the fans rally for “RANDY! RANDY!” as he circles with Styles. They tie up, Styles waistlocks, but Orton elbows free. Styles kicks low, headlocks, but Orton pulls hair to power up and out. Styles RAMS shoulders with Orton, runs, but Orton UPPERCUTS at the ropes! Orton then runs up to clothesline Styles up and out! The fans fire up and Orton get son the corner to do his pose! The fans are even more fired up, and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again and Orton has Styles in a corner to rain down fists! The fans count along as Orton makes sure each one hurts! Orton goes all the way to nine, then brings Styles out to UPPERCUT for TEN! The fans are all fired up and Orton looms over Styles. Orton drags Styles up, scoops, btu Styles slips free to DROPKICK! Styles then runs, SLIDING FOREARM! Orton bails out fast, but Styles talks trash on the fans before going to the apron. SLIDING KNEE! Orton staggers, bumps into the post, and then all the way to the Prime hydration station. Styles storms out after Orton, but Orton kicks low!

Orton lured Styles in, and now he hits a BARRIER BACK SUPLEX! Orton shoves Styles down, then brings him back up. The fans fire up as Orton drags Styles along the barrier, but Styles fights free! Styles ROCKS Orton, then goes up to use the barriers, to jump to the desk! And from desk, to PHENOMENAL- APRON BACK SUPLEX! Then DESK BACK SUPLEX! Orton makes Styles pay for getting cute, and fans want that “ONE MORE TIME!” Orton refreshes the ring count, then he brings Styles up again, for a DESK BACK SUPLEX! Styles sputters, Orton takes a bow, and the fans are thunderous!

Orton puts Styles in the ring, storms in after him, and goes to a corner. But Styles FLAPJACKS Orton off the buckles! Orton staggers back, Styles DROPKICKS the leg! Styles runs to CHOP BLOCK! Orton flounders and goes to ropes. Orton bails out, hobbles around, leans on barriers, but Styles goes out the other side. Styles runs in around the way, and he CHOP BLOCKS at full speed! The fans boo and the ref reprimands but Styles says this is a match, isn’t it? Styles watches Orton writhe while SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns once again and Styles has Orton down in the ring. Styles puts the bad leg on ropes, to HIP DROP on it! And then HIP DROP again! The ref reprimands, the fans boo, but Styles ELBOW DROPS the leg! Orton still grabs at Styles but Styles pushes him down. Styles grabs that bad leg, brings it around to another side of the ring, and he soaks up the heat while standing on the foot. But then Orton BOOTS Styles up and out of the ring! The fans fire up as the ring count starts on Styles. Orton shakes out the bad leg, rolls away to center, and stands up. Styles steps in, Orton KICKS the ropes to jam him up!

Orton has Styles and the fans are thunderous again! But Styles slips free, roll and CALF- NO, Orton slips free to STOMP Styles! Orton hobbles, but he still watches Styles. Styles stands into a LARIAT! And another LARIAT! Orton ducks, but Styles avoids the powerslam and Orton just falls! OKLAHOMA ROLL! TWO, and Orton UPPERCUTS! Styles flops to the apron, the fans rally up, and Orton grits his teeth. Orton forces himself to stand, but Styles also stands on the apron. Orton storms his way over to get Styles back in the ropes! But Styles gets the bad leg! DRAPING DRAGON SCREW! Orton falls back, Styles drags himself back up!

The fans rally for Orton as he stands, but Styles takes aim! Springboard and- NO, Orton trips him up! Styles falls to the mat and goes to a corner. Orton storms over, he drags Styles up, but Styles again wants the leg! Orton holds ropes but Styles powers through! Orton sits up to fight off the Calf Crusher, but Styles still pulls! Orton endures, the fans rally as hard as they can, and he reaches back to hook Styles! Orton can’t push Styles down as Styles pulls on that bad leg! Orton grits his teeth, tries again, and he gets Styles into a headlock! Styles lets go of the leg, slips free of the headlock, but runs into the SNAP POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO!

Styles survives and Orton is frustrated, but Orton won’t stop now. Orton stalks Styles to a corner, drags him up and puts him up top. Orton ROCKS Styles with a right hand, then ROCKS him again! Orton climbs, the fans fire up, but Styles slips out! Styles YANKS Orton down, runs up, but Orton puts Styles in the ropes! DRAPING DDT!! Both men are down and the fans are thunderous again! Orton rises again, and with the Mohegan Sun red hot for him, Orton hears those voices! Styles rises, RK- NO! Styles shoves Orton away, runs up, but is put on the apron! Styles ROCKS Orton, springboards, PHENOMENAL FOREARM!! Cover, ROPEBREAK!!!

Orton survives by his fingertips and Styles cannot believe it! Styles argues with the ref but the ref says ropebreak is ropebreak! Styles drags Orton back up and “This is Awesome!” But the fans also boo as Styles calls his shot! But Orton RKOS!!! Cover, Orton wins!!

Winner: Randy Orton, by pinfall (advances to the next round)

Truly outta nowhere, The Viper strikes and turns things right around! Styles loses again, what must he do to get back on track? As for Orton, he promised to go after Tama Tonga, will he be like Kevin Owens and #JustKeepFighting until he can?


My Thoughts:

A great SmackDown here to start there part of the King & Queen of the Ring tournaments, but it seems even they have to put a couple matches on the “Supershow” live event this weekend to go with the two from Raw. Santos VS Knight is gonna be a really good one, and I’m a little surprised it’s Mia Yim VS Tiffany Stratton in the other. Not that those two aren’t great choices, but just that I figured Tiffany for a shot at Bayley’s title on the side, same as Becky VS Liv. That said, Tiff is definitely winning because Mia is part of the NXT Women’s North American Championship story. Mia will more than likely win her qualifying match over there to be part of NXT Battleground’s ladder match.

Speaking of Bayley, good promo segment from her with Chelsea & Piper, quick as it was. Chelsea talking smack on Jade of course meant Jade was winning, and natural segue from Jade exiting to Bianca entering. Bianca winning out makes sense, too, but it was a much quicker match than expected. Naomi VS Nia was a great match, and Nia winning makes sense. However, Nia running up into Jade next, I would think Jade wins. And if it’s Bianca VS Tiff, I’m thinking Tiff wins only because I don’t think they’d make Jade and Bianca face each other while they’re still tag champions. Jade VS Tiff will make for a very good SmackDown finals.

Great stuff on the men’s side, too. Great promo with The Bloodline backstage, Solo really coming into his own with this almost usurper role. And assuming Lashley’s injury is legit, Dawkins stepping in actually works out for the better, as The Bloodline can screw Dawkins over and get Tama into the next round. Lashley needs to stay strong kayfabe wise for when he faces Melo. Good promo from Corbin and Melo, great match from them, and Melo with the quick pin win was a good way to have him advance while keeping Corbin strong. Melo keeps mouthing off to veterans, but he’ll have to be careful not to do that to Randy next time.

Great promos from Styles and Orton ahead of their great main event, and great win for Orton. Orton wants Tama in the SmackDown finals, and there’s a good chance we get that with Orton facing Melo and Tama facing the winner of LA Knight VS Santos Escobar. You can bet Knight comes out the winner, only to again get screwed over by The Bloodline. We also got some good “Look who’s on SmackDown now/again!” videos, which I think I missed a few. But Nakamura and Andrade had good promos, and the videos were really just for fans who haven’t been paying attention that closely even though we just got the WWE Draft a couple weeks ago.

And of course, big stuff going on for Cody Rhodes’ next title defense. A little surprised Logan was chosen given he’s still US Champion, but then it seems like they want to at least tease Winner Takes All. Nothing was officially said, but that’d be pretty wild stuff. Grand Slam American Nightmare would be cool, Two Belt Logan would not, I’m just not sure WWE would go through with either. There could be shenanigans that keep either man from losing their title, because otherwise, two title scenes will be overlapping and I’m not even sure Cody would be able to handle a doubleheader of defending both Undisputed and United States Championships.

My Score: 8.9/10


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 5.9.2024

Under Siege was straight trash homie…can we salvage some sense coming off a bad PLE?

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Well Under Siege kind of sucked except for the last 2 matches…so I really have no clue what to expect from this episode. We’re apparently kicking off with a System championship celebration party, so this could be slow and cringe or actually interesting. Really only two ways to go with this.

Let’s find out if I’m drinking early tonight.

Ratings:

FBI (Ray Jaz & Zack Clayton w/Little Guido) vs First Class (Rich Swann & AJ Francis): Swann wins via Frog Splash – * 1/2

The Rascalz (Zachary Wentz & Trey Miguel) vs Jake Something & Cody Deaner: Rascalz win Tandem Goomba Stomp/Sit Out – *

Jonathan Gresham vs Will Ferrera: Gresham wins via CephaloPin – Squash

ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey) vs Speedball Mountain (Trent Seven & Speedball Mike Bailey): Speedball Mountain win via Ultima Birminghammer – *** 1/2

 

Results:

So Myers opens up the segment, and the crowd is a bit flat, but both Myers and then Moose start laying in the “greatest faction of all time” stuff, so I guess we’re gonna start to see some cracks soon. But this is a rough promo to open with. The crowd is just barely reacting and having the local minor league team cheerleaders or something come out for their entrance was just awkward. This is all going over like a fart in church.

Lish says she put a video package together, but it gets interrupted by Broken Matt Hardy with a steel chair, and at least the crowd cares a little and Hardy seems to be into the promo a bit. Not as much as Under Siege, but definitely better than when he first came back. OH MY GOD! Lish says people can’t understand Broken Matt because of HIS accent. Okay, that’s a fantastic line. The promo is still kinda flat, but Lish had the line of the exchange so far. Hardy fights them with the chair, does pretty decent until Lish brings out Kendra the Kendo Stick and interferes enough to get the others to use the numbers advantage. But Ryan Nemeth hits the ring and makes the save for Matt. 

The cheerleaders turn on The System and start doing the “Delete” motion. Very…stupid. 

FBI (Ray Jaz & Zack Clayton w/Little Guido) vs First Class (Rich Swann & AJ Francis)

Rich gets thrown around a little early on from Zack, until he goes to the eyes and gives AJ a shot to come in and hit some assisted moves. Zack it draped over the ropes, the referee backs off AJ and Swann takes cheap shots over and over while the referee is distracted. AJ gets too cocky, slowly goes for a corner Splash and misses, but he grabs Zack’s wrist to try and stop the tag. Big car crash Double Lariat leads to a simultaneous tag and Ray Jaz takes the hot tag. A few quick strikes into a Running Backdrop Driver for a near fall. AJ breaks up the pin, Zack tries to even the odds but AJ handles him and chucks him out. Rich Dropkicks Ray into AJ, Chokeslam into the Frog Splash, First Class wins.

Alan Angels stupid talk show is back and he’s flirting with SDL and Kon is still in the mix. This is cringe, awful and I’d rather shoot myself in the head. This sucks. 

The Rascalz (Zachary Wentz & Trey Miguel) vs Jake Something & Cody Deaner

So this is a Tornado Tag now because of Deaner’s stupid “People’s Choice” gimmick. I have lost nearly any desire to care about this match purely because Deaner is a plight on wrestling. Deaner and Something have early control, but I literally don’t care. I’m just waiting for Deaner to screw this up somehow since he’s not likable or charming, and this is painful. I’d rather have a root canal than watch this, and we all know I love Zachary Wentz.

Thankfully Wentz and Trey start to turn things around, but I want to get away from this match faster than Tom Brady left his own roast. We all know that if the Deaner team ever starts to build momentum its because of Jake. I just really want nothing to do with this match. Its trash, its spots for spots sake, spray paint in Jake’s eyes, Double Superkick, into the Rocket Launcher/Super Kick tandem and then Goomba Stomp Sitout Powerbomb for the Rascalz to win. Thank Christ its over.

OH more good news! Maclin comes out and kills The Rascalz on the ramp! 

This Gabby segment is awful. She’s just asking about names, its almost as stupid and irritating as Art Donovan “How much does this guy weigh”.  I usually love the ASH gimmick, but with this moronic Gabby chick, this is awful. Gabby is terrible, baiting the comedy reactions from ASH and Iceman makes their gimmick less charming because being obliviously goofy in serious situations is what makes them great. Not feeding into the comedy. Too much talking in this episode, and by people that shouldn’t be talking. 

Jonathan Gresham vs Will Ferrera

The local jobber doesn’t even look like enhancement talent, he looks like a temp at a run down office. Gresham comes out with a few low kicks, then a Dropkick and a little bit of the Muta flourish as he goes to tie up the jobber Heel Hook, Butterflied Arms behind the calf, and the official starts to cough. The referee coughing distracts Gresham enough to give Ferrera a few spots, but a Asai Moonsault into a Trailer Hitch, Kneecap Smash and then he just stalks his prey. Octopus hold with the ink, hand over Ferrera’s face, CephaloPin.

ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey) vs Speedball Mountain (Trent Seven & Speedball Mike Bailey)

So there’s a weird wrinkle to this match, the winning team will face each other in the number one contender match.

Bey and Bailey start off and Bailey catches Bey with a Dropkick, tags in Trent, Chops, Kicks, Trent with the Assisted Corkscrew Senton for a near fall. Trent does his Kojima Chops, Bailey tags in, Poetry in Motion for another near fall. Bey finally finds a tag and they rip off a Tandem Overhead Hammerlock Takeover, near fall, Ace continues to work on Bailey, Snap Suplex, Bey tags in, Low Clothesline for a near fall, Knee to the spine into another cover but only a 1 count. Bailey makes the desperate tag out, Trent comes in with some Chops, Back Elbows and Scoop Spinning Fowsion for 2! Bailey tags back in, some back and forth big attempts, Superplex from Trent, Bailey goes for the Shooting Star Press but hits only the mat! Things spill to the outisde and they’re just throwing chops, Speedball Mountain both miss chops at the same time into the post, ABC try to capitalize.

Bey works over the hand that just crashed into the post, Cross Arm Breaker attempt, Key Lock attempt but Bailey is fighting back. Bailey tries to prevent Bey from tagging in Ace while also trying to protect the hand. Flurry of Kicks out of nowhere! Bey falls back into his own corner so Ace tags in while Speedball is selling fatigue. Bailey Roundhouse Kick miss, Superkick miss cause Ace Matrix dodges, Ace goes for the Spinning Heel Kick but misses, they both go for High Round kicks and connect at the same time. Both sell and then crawl to their corners, simultaneous tags on Trent and Bey. Bey tries the Satellite DDT, Trent stops him, Bey with a Roundhouse Kick, Trent spins the momentum with a Spinning Backfist. Seven Star Lariat attempt, block, Gamengiri into a Cutter for two for ABC! Tandem Ripcord Knees from ABC, into the Brianbuster with the Round Kick, Bailey makes the save at 2! ABC in control, Trent and Bailey try to fight from underneath, Bop and Bang gives them a moment, Ace throws Trent’s backfist into Bailey’s face. Breakdown, Superkick rewinds Ace into the Seven Star Lariat! 1-2-Phenomenal Forearm from Bey sends Bailey falling into the pinfall to break it.

Ace tags in Bey, 1-2-Sweet is called for but Bailey pulls Trent to the side, Dive and Asai Moonsault keep Speedball Mountain alive. Briminghammer/Ultima Weapon attempt, but Ace gets out of the Birminghammer, Bey knocks Bailey off, Ace kicks Trent out, Fosbury Flop from Ace levels both Mountain members. Ace is busy talking shit to Mustafa while Bey is yelling since Ace is legal, they take too long. Tornado Dragon Suplex takes out Bey, Ultima Birminghammer wins!

 

Overall Score: 2.5/10

This was the worst episode I’ve seen since the terrible AEW crossover time. 75% of the show was talking, the segments were cringe, dead or just straight up bad. Gabby LaSpisa has no business on a televised product. I couldn’t care less if she’s part of the Busted Open idiot squad, she can stay in podcast form buried far away from people with personalities. Deaner is worthless, Kon and Angels are both insanely worthless, Jake absorbing a bunch of losses is JUST like his last run with the company. PUSH HIM. He’s got a great look, he’s athletic, yes he needs a better name than “Something” but get Deaner far away from him. I mean the stupidity of this show made me dislike the ASH by Elegance segment, which annoys me since I really love her gimmick.

Only good things were we’re seeing some kind of return/repackage of Giselle Shaw and the main event was decent even though they’re really being heavy handed with the ABC breaking up thing. The fear a bunch of us had after Scott left was just watching a ton of factions and teams fall apart…and that’s happened. MCMG are gone, Dango hasn’t been seen in like a month, ABC is on the way out, Kevin Knight hasn’t been around with Kushida so I guess they aren’t a thing in TNA anymore. Ugh…and I am not looking forward to the 16 person clusterfuck next week.

I’m going to be purchasing a lot of alcohol before next week. This was unabashed garbage.


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