SmackDown is reeling from The Fiend’s return!
Alexa Bliss is somehow entangled in the wicked web connecting Bray Wyatt and Braun Strowman! What is the fate of the Five Feet of Fury?
- Matt Riddle VS Sheamus; Riddle wins, by disqualification.
- Cesaro w/ Shinsuke Nakamura VS Lince Dorado w/ Gran Metalik; Cesaro wins.
- Baron Corbin VS Jeff Hardy; Hardy wins, by disqualification.
- Sheamus VS Baron Corbin; Sheamus wins.
- Heavy Machinery VS The Miz & John Morrison w/ Sonya Deville; No Contest.
PLAY BY PLAY
The Swamp Fight had deeper repercussions than we could’ve imagined.
The Monster Among Men battled himself, Bray Wyatt, and temptation. Sister Abigail took the form of Alexa Bliss to trick Braun Strowman, and in the end that would allow the Eater of Worlds to drag him down into the depths. Firefly Bray claims he was just trying to help, “but now he is awake.” The Fiend wants the Universal Championship and will do whatever he must to get it! And so, when she was at her most vulnerable, Alexa Bliss became The Fiend’s newest victim!! “None of you are safe.” But then, why Alexa first? Is there a deeper meaning to what happened in that swamp?
SmackDown opens with the Firefly Fun House!
Bray has turned the Wall of Friends into the Wall of Braun! Before the fun starts, Bray wants to address something. “A bunch of haters have been sliding into my DM’s, blaming little ol’ me for what happened to Alexa Bliss last week.” Yowie wowie, if you want to blame anyone, blame Braun! How could he let something so horrific happen to someone he claims to care so much about? All Braun had to do was to give him what he wants. Now, Bray happens to know that he will be here later, “with someone very special.” He is waiting, Braun. And Bray advises Braun to just give him what he wants, or she will find out what he is truly capable of. Woo, Bray has the heeby jeebies just thinking about it! BYE~! See you later~! Will Braun save Alexa from The Fiend? Even if it costs him something he worked so hard to get?
Matt Riddle VS Sheamus!
Bro…! While the Wolf King wants to send Riddle back to NXT, that’s not something that can just happen. As for the Celtic Warrior, he wants to shake off his Bar Fight with Jeff Hardy to get back on track. Will Sheamus solve the Riddle problem before Chad Gable can cash in on the King’s Ransom? Or will the Fella lose big to the Bro?
The bell rings and Sheamus circles with Riddle. The crowd rallies for Riddle as he and Sheamus tie up. Sheamus powers Riddle to a corner, the two keep pushing but they break at the ref’s reprimand. Riddle and Sheamus circle, Riddle waistlocks, becomes a backpack but Sheamus gets the ropebreak. Riddle lets off and the two go again. Sheamus gets a headlock and takedown, but Riddle gets his shoulders up. Sheamus traps an arm, Riddle works on his escape, but Sheamus shifts to a keylock. Riddle gets around to waistlock, Sheamus wrenches back but Riddle rolls and gets a leg. Riddle trips Sheamus up but Sheamus gets away to stand off.
The two circle again, Riddle tests with a kick, then another. Sheamus headlocks again, Riddle powers him to ropes and throws some quick body shots. Sheamus lets go and the two stand off again. Sheamus grabs an arm, wrenches and knees low and hard! Sheamus stomps Riddle to the ropes but lets up at the ref’s count. Sheamus drags Riddle up, cranks on the arm and uses a chinbar to wrangle him down. Riddle endures as Sheamus leans on the hold. The crowd rallies up, Riddle fights up and throws body shots. Riddle gets the arm, drags Sheamus down in a partial Fujiwara! Sheamus endures, but Riddle pulls the fingers!
Sheamus crawls around, Riddle shifts to a keylock, then a mount. Sheamus moves around, Riddle makes it a cover, TWO! They separate, Riddle comes back, Sheamus gut wrenches to a POWERBOMB! The crowd boos but Sheamus throws haymakers on Riddle at the ropes. Sheamus whips but Riddle holds the ropes to deny it. The ref counts, Sheamus throws hands but Riddle still holds ropes. Riddle then hits back, dumps Sheamus to the apron but Sheamus hotshots Riddle down! Sheamus drags Riddle up to club away for the Bodhrain! Sheamus gets all 10 beats before the ref counts 4 and he lets Riddle fall. Sheamus climbs, but Riddle intercepts with a forearm, and down goes Sheamus! Riddle catches his breath while SmackDown goes to break!
SmackDown returns and Sheamus thrashes Riddle around in a sleeper hold! Riddle endures, fights back, then runs, into the IRISH CURSE BACKBREAKER! Sheamus gives him a second! And a third! Cover, TWO! Sheamus keeps Riddle down with a chinlock but the crowd rallies up. Riddle fights up, fights back with body shots, but Sheamus knees low. Sheamus back suplexes, Riddle lands on his feet and ROUNDHOUSES Sheamus down! The crowd is thunderous as both men slowly sit up. Sheamus stands first and brings Riddle up, but Riddle throws body shots! Riddle fires off fists and a boot, spins Sheamus around for the PELE!
Riddle kips up, forearms Sheamus in the corner, goes side to side and hits another! Then the BROSPLODER! PENALTY KICK! BROTON! Cover, TWO! Sheamus survives but Riddle keeps his focus. Riddle drops another Broton! Then he goes up top, FLOATING BRO but he lands on his feet as Sheamus dodges! Sheamus scoops Riddle and hits WHITE NOISE! Cover, TWO!! Sheamus seethes as Riddle still lives! Sheamus goes to a corner while Riddle stirs. The crowd is fired up again, even as Sheamus runs out. Riddle dodge the Brogue to GERMAN SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO! Riddle is red in the face as he runs at Sheamus. Sheamus rolls Riddle, TWO! Tilt-o-whirl backbreaker! Sheamus runs but POSTS himself!
Sheamus tumbles out of the ring but Riddle pursues. Riddle comes around the way as the crowd fires up, and starts firing off Bro Kicks! Riddle throws forearms, Sheamus forearms and KNEES Riddle down! Riddle crawls and stumbles, and Chad Gable attacks!!
Winner: Matt Riddle, by disqualification
Gable just ruined the match but Riddle kicks him in return! Riddle throws Gable into the boards! And then LEAPS off the steps for a SUPER BRO PUNCH! Riddle bounces Gable off the desk over and over and over! Sheamus watches as Riddle throws Gable into the steps! Riddle takes aim, and Penalty Kicks Gable even deeper into the steps! Sheamus is more upset that Gable took away his win, but the Bro moves on. Sheamus drags Gable up into the ring, glares at Shorty G as he gets up, and Sheamus BROGUES Gable down!!
Sheamus demands to get a mic, and is given one. “What you think you’re doing?! Coming out and messing up my match, for what?! For Corbin’s bounty?!” Gable took what was Sheamus’, so he’s gonna get even more pain! ANOTHER BROGUE!! Will both Gable and Corbin stay out of Sheamus’ way from now on?
Baron Corbin talks with someone backstage.
The King happily offers Sarah a tour of SmackDown, but Sheamus barges in. Corbin is upset, but Sheamus says he’s lucky Sarah is here. Corbin’s minion cost Sheamus over this King’s Ransom rubbish. Corbin chuckles but Sheamus says if it happens again, Sheamus will kick Corbin’s head right off his shoulders, and shove that crown right up Corbin”s royal arse. Sheamus thinks he can? Sheamus dares Corbin to try him. Corbin says Sheamus is lucky he has Jeff Hardy to worry about, or he’d put a dent in Sheamus’ skull right now. Corbin leaves and Sarah shyly follows. Is this just the beginning of the war between Wolf King and Celtic Warrior?
SmackDown presents The Dirt Sheet!
It’s back! John Morrison introduces himself, and says no one is as underground as him. And The Miz is the Most Must-See WWE Superstar of all time, but we all saw the most tragic thing in the WWE ever. That is to say, Sonya Deville brutally attacking Mandy Rose backstage! Smearing the make-up was only part of it, as Sonya cut pieces of Mandy’s hair away! And smiled and laughed as she did! But before things could get uglier, pardon the pun, referees and security stopped Sonya.
Morrison says that often, they focus on gossip and pop culture, but sometimes something happens and it puts you back in touch with the real priorities. The Dirt Sheet’s considerable influence to- Wait, more technical difficulties? Wasn’t this solved after Raw? Well “Retribution” or whatever you guys call yourselves, you’re not scheduled for SmackDown! You’re a Raw thing! Anyhow, Miz says they are going to use their influence and power to the victim. It is brave of her to even be here, even if it is via satellite. Please welcome… Mandy’s Hair. On the titantron is basically a wig with googly eyes. “Hi~ guys~!” Morrison’s jacket looks great, even in this heat. Thanks, but tonight is about you, Mandy’s Hair.
Miz and Morrison can’t imagine what Mandy’s Hair went through! The savagery! The humiliation! And the lack of a proper blade. Is she okay? Well she’ll be the first to admit that the attack left her “shook” but what hurt the most was that Mandy hasn’t reached out to her once after the incident! The nerve! And for years, she never let Mandy down! Yeah, Mandy’s Hair has been held back, sometimes literally! Mandy just loves topknots! And Otis is always running his grubby fingers through her while he and that idiot Tucker babble on about meats and cheeses! EW~! EWWW~! Oh my goodness, and then she gets Photoshop’d her! She has beautiful roots but does anyone know that?! It’s okay, Mandy’s Hair. If you guys want Mandy’s Hair to cheer up, give us a Hair Yeah! “HAIR~ YEAH~!”
But what’s next? Mandy’s Hair will just take some “me time” to fix her split ends. The world has a lot to offer, such as moisturizer. It may be summer but it is snowy up in here~! Mandy’s scalp has more flakes than Kellogg’s! Can we get a hair yea? HAIR~ YEAH~! The crowd boos while Miz says the future is bright. Does she want Miz’s agent’s number? No need! After the buzz she got last week, she got a call from the people at Netflix~! Whoa! That’s incredible! Best of luck, Mandy’s Hair! It is not every day that Miz and Morrison have something special like this feel good moment right here. But to be honest, the real victim hasn’t been heard from. Everyone needs to give her the attention she deserves to tell her story. Give a Dirt Sheet welcome to… SONYA DEVILLE!
Sonya?! The victim!? The crowd boos even harder as Sonya walks to the ring and joins the hosts. Sonya says Mandy’s Hair is someone she can get behind: hardworking, self-motivated, self-made! Everything Mandy isn’t! And she already has a catchphrase: HAIR YEAH! But what compelled Sonya to do that in the first place? Sonya isn’t sure why there’s confusion at all. Sonya said she’d ruin Mandy’s life, make her as ugly as she is on the inside, so what’s the issue? To make something clear, Sonya is a woman of her word. She does what she says. Did she enjoy smashing Mandy’s face off that table? Absolutely. Did she enjoy smearing that perfect make-up and cutting her hair off? Absolutely!
The best part was that Mandy was so scared! And not because of the scissors or getting beat up, but because she is so concerned about her looks! It’s all she’s ever had! The Golden Goddess, God’s Greatest Creation! It’s kinda sad, really. Sonya would feel bad, but she doesn’t. Sonya has no respect for Mandy. Mandy is so weak! She was broken physically for being beaten twice, then emotionally for getting a haircut! And now, this terrible crowd expects Mandy to show up and get her revenge, but it won’t happen! Sonya’s already destroyed Mandy, but Mandy can come out and correct her if she’s wrong! But no Mandy, as Sonya thought. We have not heard from Mandy since last week. Not one social media selfie.
That’s Sonya’s point! Mandy got in by winning bikini contests. Oh, and she does have one other talent. Mandy won a Bumpy. But for what? For making out with Otis. Can’t make that up. She has a trophy for making out with someone. Just putting that out there. The only bright side, other than ruining Mandy’s career, is that she and Otis look like a couple now. Yeah, a couple of ogres! Morrison commends Miz on that joke. But here comes Heavy Machinery! They attack Miz and Morrison while Sonya bails out! Miz gets tossed, then Morrison gets thrown into a corner! Corner splash! Morrison goes down, Otis pumps up! But Miz saves Morrison before the Caterpillar can start up! Heavy Machinery wants after Miz and Morrison some more, but SmackDown first goes to break!
Cesaro w/ Shinsuke Nakamura VS Lince Dorado w/ Gran Metalik!
The Swiss Cyborg and King of Strong Style were celebrating in the “champion’s lounge” but told Lucha House Party to get out since the King of the Ropes “blew it” and lost his match for the Intercontinental Championship. Now the Golden Lynx will go after Cesaro for those comments! Will LHP shift back to the SmackDown Tag Team Championship hunt with a victory tonight?
The bell rings and Lince tests the waters with a kick. Cesaro powers Lince to a corner and throws body shots and knees! Cesaro whips corner to corner, Lince goes up and over then handsprings away. Lince baits Cesaro in, dodges and tilt-o-whirls, but Cesaro powers through to make it a backbreaker! Cesaro drags Lince up to EuroUpper him down! Cesaro drags Lince around but Lince kicks him back! Cesaro yanks Lince up, Lince lands on his feet, but Cesaro STO’s him back down! Cesaro knuckle locks, but Lince blocks the press to pop up and tilt-o-whirl headscissor Cesaro out! The lights flicker but Lince builds speed to FLY! Cesaro catches the senton to bring Lince up! Lince climbs the Plexiglas to come back and huricanrana Cesaro into the apron!
Lince clubs away and puts Cesaro back in the ring. Lince throws shoulders into Cesaro, slingshots up and over, cover, TWO! Lince goes back to the apron, enziguris Cesaro back, then springboards, into Cesaro’s arms! ANOTHER BACKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Cesaro is frustrated but he drags Lince back up to CLUB in the back! Cesaro traps an arm, then the other, and clubs away on Lince’s chest! He then puts Lince down to drop an elbow! Cover, TWO! Cesaro drags Lince into an armlock but the crowd and Metalik rally up. Lince fights, Cesaro has both arms, but Lince dropkicks free! Ceasro comes back but gets a jawbreaker!
Lince fires off body shots, CHOPS, then whips. Cesaro reverses, Lince boots him back, then Lince runs at Cesaro. Cesaro pops him up but Lince balances on Cesaro’s shoulders and flips back! Lince dodges Cesoar, handsprings, GOLDEN REWIND! Lince hurries to a corner and bottom rope moonsaults! Then the second rope moonsault! Lince wants the hat trick but Nakamura distracts! Lince swipes at him but Cesaro clubs Lince back. Cesaro has the crucifix lift for a Razor’s Edge, countered by a Rana! Cover, TWO! Cesaro EuroUppers Lince, Gotch NEUTRALIZER! Cover, Cesaro wins!
Winner: Cesaro, by pinfall
Though a tag team champion, Cesaro is still a superb singles wrestler! Will Cesaro and Nakamura continue to conquer the tag division one team at a time?
Otis’ rage is building backstage!
He shakes a frame but Tucker calms him down. They get their match with Morrison and Miz later tonight. Kayla Braxton comes by to speak to how Heavy Machinery put an end to a very disrespectful Dirt Sheet. They have a match, Otis is clearly upset, but can he channel it into the win? Miz and Morrison joke around, and Otis likes jokes, but this is crossing the line! Tucker says what Sonya did was despicable, and then Miz and Morrison pile on! Otis can handle a joke about himself, cuz he’s gotten it all since he was a kid. But when it comes to his sweet peach, he won’t stand for it! Miz and Morrison are going to find when they anger Otis, “no one is going to be laughing then!” And then Otis knocks the crate over with one hand! That rage is coming for the Greatest Tag Team of the 21st Century, will Miz and Morrison survive?
The lights start going down in the ring!
That’s because HE is here!! The Fiend is live on SmackDown!! It’s time for Braun Strowman to make his decision, after the break.
SmackDown returns to The Fiend waiting under his red lights, with the siren sound screeching, and Alexa Bliss in the ring! It’s almost as if she was trapped in time until this moment. The Fiend slithers around, but she stops him from using the Mandible Claw. Alexa touches his face as if everything’s alright, but he pushes her away. Braun speaks to the “sadistic bastard.” Braun is on screen and says if he thought The Fiend could play with his emotions, he was wrong. Braun doesn’t care about Alexa anymore. All Braun cares about is destroying Bray. Braun knew there were only two ways he was getting out: one, by becoming the most evil SOB on earth; two, as man with the satisfaction that he spat in the devil’s face and tore him limb from limb. But since Bray is still standing, clearly Bruan has become the evil SOB.
Braun resisted but was pushed to his breaking point, and has let it out. The thing clawing and scratching inside him is out, and he is fulfilling his destiny! Braun is more than a man. He is a thing nightmares are made of! He is THE MONSTER! The Fiend can have whatever he wants, because at SummerSlam, The Fiend faces The Monster. Will Bray regret the moment Braun decided to let him in?
Baron Corbin VS Jeff Hardy!
The Wolf King isn’t just facing Jeff Hardy, he is facing a reinvigorated Charismatic Enigma! Will Hardy’s redemption story continue as he conquers the king? Or will Corbin do what Sheamus couldn’t and write the last chapter to it?
The bell rings and Corbin tells the crew to take good care of his robe and crown. Hardy rallies the fans as he circles with Corbin. They tie up, Hardy dodges the punch to atomic drop! Hardy throws hands, Corbin rebounds and Hardy wrenches to go after the arm! Hardy rams shoulders then clubs away more. Corbin breaks free but Hardy dodges and clobbers Corbin! Another atomic drop, take down and leg splitting leg drop! Basement dropkick added, and then a splash! Cover, TWO! Hardy is right on Corbin but Corbin uppercuts! Hardy staggers back but dodges, Corbin slides out then in but into a kick! No Twist just yet though as Corbin spins out and LARIATS! Cover, TWO!
Corbin is annoyed but he keeps on Hardy with a right hand! Corbin sits Hardy back up to hit him down again. Hardy sits up but Corbin brings him up by his hair. Corbin throws Hardy out of the ring and then goes out to pursue. The crowd boos at Corbin as he brings Hardy up and sets him on the announce desk. Corbin rains down right hands until Hardy flops over. The ref counts and is past 5 but Corbin puts Hardy in. Cover, TWO! Corbin grows even more annoyed but he looms over Hardy. Corbin sits Hardy up to drive elbows in over and over to both sides! Then he wraps Hardy up in a chinbar half nelson to grind Hardy down. Hardy endures and the crowd rallies up. Hardy fights up, fights back, but Corbin throws him back down!
Corbin cranks harder on the hold, but Hardy still endures. Hardy fights up slowly but fights out with body shots. Corbin throws Hardy to a corner and runs in, but Hardy dodges. Corbin slides out but Hardy wrecks him with a dropkick! Hardy goes after Corbin over and over on the barriers then bounces him off the boards! Hardy puts Corbin back in, runs but into DEEP SIX! Cover, TWO! Hardy survives and Corbin seethes but Corbin looms over Hardy again. Corbin drags Hardy up by an arm, whips but Hardy comes back with haymakers! Hardy tries a jawbreaker but gets a KNEE! Hardy falls out of the ring but then Sheamus BROGUES Hardy!!
Winner: Jeff Hardy, by disqualification
Sheamus returns the favor and Corbin is furious! Are these two going to throw down now?! SmackDown goes to break as the ref tries to keep the peace!
Sheamus VS Baron Corbin!
SmackDown returns and Sheamus is already firing off on Corbin in a corner! Sheamus stomps away then throws more haymakers. Sheamus knees, bumps Corbin off buckles and then drags Corbin up to rake the face! Corbin flounders, Sheamus stomps and knees him down, then knees him at the ropes. Sheamus throws EuroUppers, drags Corbin back up and whips. Corbin kicks back, runs but into a kitchen sink knee! Sheamus stalks Corbin to the apron, drags him up, and goes to put him in the Bodhrain. Corbin keeps fighting it off, then drops down and the ref backs Sheamus off. Sheamus goes out the side instead, but Corbin runs him over!
The crowd rallies up while Corbin refreshes the ring count. Corbin throws Sheamus into the boards! Then throws body shots! Sheamus stays standing but Corbin refreshes the count. Corbin brings Sheamus to the desk to bounce him off it over and over! Corbin puts Sheamus in, but Sheamus KNEES Corbin at the ropes! Sheamus runs to clothesline Corbin back out! Sheamus goes out to throw Corbin into the barriers! And now Sheamus gets to dribble Corbin off the desk! Sheamus refreshes the count, dribbles Corbin more, then POSTS him! Corbin rolls and flops, and Sheamus talks trash. Sheamus stands on Corbin, then brings him up and into the ring. Sheamus climbs up top, takes aim, but Corbin dodges! SIDEWALK SLAM! Cover, TWO!
Corbin rains down rights on Sheamus then snarls as he drags Sheamus up. Corbin POSTS Sheamus in return! And bends him back against the buckles to rain down more rights! The ref reprimands, Corbin lets off and brings Sheamus up. Corbin DECKS Sheamus with that right, then puts the chinbar half nelson on like he had on Hardy. Sheamus fights up but Corbin wrangles him down. Corbin cranks, Sheamus endures and fights up. Sheamus is on his feet but Corbin wrangles him right back down! Corbin leans on Sheamus but Sheamus continues to fight. The crowd rallies up harder and Sheamus throws body shots. Sheamus is free, he fireman’s carries Corbin, but Corbin fights out with elbows! Corbin shoves and LARIATS Sheamus down!
Both men are on the mat but Corbin gets up. Riddle flies in! Corbin avoids the flying knee, but Sheamus hits a BROGUE!! Cover, Sheamus wins!
Winner: Sheamus, by pinfall
Riddle fist bumps commentary while Sheamus celebrates, because payback is sweet! Will Corbin continue to pay for putting a price on The Bro’s head?
The Golden Role Models meet up backstage.
Sasha Banks asks Bayley if she’s okay but Bayley says she’s fine. Is this because Sasha volunteered Bayley to face Asuka on Raw? No! Why even bring that up? Though, they could’ve talked it over. Sasha isn’t worried about it! Bayley’s got this! And Sasha needs Bayley to do this because Asuka wants a rematch for Sasha’s Raw Women’s Championship! Well, yeah, but she also wants revenge for what Bayley did to Kairi Sane so… That doesn’t matter! This is not about Asuka! This is about them! They have all the gold! They did this! Not only are their role models, but Bayley is Sasha’s role model.
But then member of the staff comes by and informs them that they need to go to the ring. They’re going to be part of a video conference… with Stephanie McMahon. What?! Things just got a lot more complicated for the #DoubleDoubleChampChamps.
Backstage interview with Big E!
The New Day brethren, Xavier Woods and Kofi Kingston, are sidelined for the time being, meaning Big E gets to venture out on his own. What are his plans? For the past five years, Big E has been a man who log rolled to the ring, who poured boxes of cereal on the heads of eager adults, and a man whose popcorn eating gif is widely used around the world. A proud accomplishment, truly. Big E has been entertainer, tag partner, and friend. But now, Big E finally answers, “What could have been if they just passed him the ball?”
The support from the WWE Universe and the cosigns from Woods and Kofi could be seen as a weight, as pressure. They are not burdens, they are not anchors, they lift him up! Big E may not know where his run will take him, but he assures us that he will give nothing less than ALL of himself! Because~! Um… New! Day Rocks! What else? New Day Rocks! YEEEAH~! Will Big E rock just as hard alone as with ya bois?
The Golden Role Models are in the ring.
Sasha and Bayley are waiting, but then Stephanie is on the titantron. She thanks them for taking this time, and actually takes this time to congratulate them. The two of them have achieved “insurmountable goals.” They wanted to win all the championships in the WWE, and from NXT to Raw to SmackDown, they’ve done that. Sasha thanks Stephanie for that, it means so much. Bayley thanks Stephanie, they needed that because of all the jealousy in the locker room right now. Especially since all they’re trying to do is be role models for the girls around the world. Like Stephanie’s girls! They’re just finishing what Stephanie started with the Women’s Revolution.
And what a job they’ve done. Traveling to all three brands, doing whatever it takes to win. Like being a “guest referee” at Extreme Rules, or making a mockery of the stipulation Stephanie put in place when Bayley brutally attacked Kairi to make Asuka get counted out. Did Sasha not know that part? Stephanie isn’t sure about being role models, but they have everyone’s attentions. Including hers. Sasha defends that they’ve just been doing what’s “best for business,” like Stephanie! They’re following Stephanie’s example! They’re fans of Stephanie and Triple H! Everything they can on the WWE Network, available for just $9.99!
Stephanie wants them to relax. She isn’t one to hold a grudge. She is a McMahon! Umm… Well, Stephanie says she won’t lecture them, but she will challenge them. SummerSlam will see Sasha defending her Raw Women’s Championship, and it could very well be against Bayley’s opponent on Monday, “the talented, dynamic and vengeful” Asuka. As for Bayley, remember those enemies she’s made across all three brands? All of them will have a chance for retribution when they compete in a Triple Brand Battle Royal to name a #1 contender to the SmackDown Women’s Championship! “Now that’s what’s best for business.” Things are pretty bad as it is, are they only getting worse for the Golden Role Models?
Sonya talks with Miz and Morrison backstage.
How did she get in Mandy’s hair? Kayla comes by to interview Miz and Morrison. After tonight’s Dirt Sheet, do they regret taking things too far? Oh sorry they were too sophisticated out there. Miz and Morrison are professionals. Sometimes comedy offends. Morrison says those two ham ‘n’ eggers get confused, mad, and then make mistakes. It’s called gamesmanship. These two here are physical specimens. NO! Physical marvels! And mental giants! It won’t take much to outwit Otis. It’s like playing chess against a pig. If you can’t stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen. Though Otis has never stayed out of any kitchen.
Kayla just wants to warn them that this is the angriest she’s ever seen Otis. Oh, what’s he gonna do? Eat them? Otis did promise that no one would be laughing. Miz and Morrison know Heavy Machinery is big, tough and ferocious in catering. So excuse them while they prepare for the match. That showdown is after the break!
Heavy Machinery VS The Miz & John Morrison w/ Sonya Deville!
We’ve heard enough talk, it’s time to fight! Will Otis and Tucker bulldoze the former SmackDown Tag Team Champions to finally shut the A-Lister and Guru of Greatness up?
The teams sort out, Tucker starts with Morrison and they circle. Morrison ROCKS Tucker with a right, kicks away, but Tucker gets to a corner. Tucker comes back, Morrison goes Eddy Gordo and kicks low. Tucker grabs a leg for a BIG takedown and cover, TWO! Tucker clamps on with a waistlock but Morrison gets up, only to get thrown! Tucker grinds Morrison down while Sonya tries to coach Morrison. Morrison fights up and fights free, but Tucker swats the roundhouse away. Morrison ducks a punch but not the LARIAT! The crowd is fired up while Sonya is annoyed. Tucker drags Morrison up, puts him in the corner and tags Otis.
Otis whips Tucker in for a corner splash! Morrison is fed to a BIG shoulder tackle that sends him flying! Otis drags Morrison up, whips but Morrison rolls off his back. Tag to Miz, Miz kicks the gut but that just powers Otis up. Miz kicks again but Otis only grows stronger! Miz CHOPS, but Otis just tears off the shirt! Otis headbutts, runs and belly bumps Miz down! Tag to Tucker, Heavy Machinery marches around to shout out the Bushwhackers, and then BELLY SANDWICH Miz! Miz bails out, Tucker aims from the apron, and CANNONBALLS! Tucker takes out Miz and Morrison, Heavy Machinery is all fired up as SmackDown goes to break!
SmackDown returns again and Tucker is in a facelock but powering his way to the corner. Miz pulls hair and knees low to then BOOT Tucker away. Tag to Morrison but Tucker ROCKS him! Tucker elbows Miz away then rocks Morrison again. Miz spins Tucker around, A-List Combination with a springboard stomp added on! Cover, TWO! Morrison grounds ‘n’ pounds with a rain of forearms. Morrison circles Tucker and kicks him low! Morrison runs but Tucker kicks from the mat! Tucker rises as Morrison clutches the knee, Tucker throws a haymaker! Morrison forearms back, then hits low! SHINING WIZARD!
Tag to Miz and they drag Tucker up. They double GUT BUSTER Tucker, but that only hurts Morrison’s knee. Miz adds the basement DDT and covers, TWO! Sonya creeps closer to Otis’ corner but Miz mocks the belly. Miz kicks Tucker down, chokes Tucker on the ropes, then lets up so Morrison can get a cheap shot! “Hey hey hey! HO HO~!” MC M I Z and Johnny Drip Drip try to get the crowd going on their side, but it doesn’t work. Miz drags Tucker around, tag to Morrison, the 21st Century Classic backfires as Tucker uses the catapult to DECK Morrison! Tucker sits down on Miz, then crawls for his corner! The crowd rallies up, hot tag to Otis!
The Dozer rallies on Miz and Morrison with big lariats and elbows! FLAPJACK for Morrison! Morrison is put in a corner, Otis scoops and slams Miz, then he catches Morrison for a HUGE EXPLODER! Sonya freaks out as Otis fires up. Otis goes corner to corner to splash Morrison in the corner, then has a target in the drop zone! Caterpillar and ELBOW! Cover, but Miz breaks it! Tucker drags Miz and Morrison out, runs but is send into Plexiglas! Otis chases Miz but is sent into steel steps! Everyone is down on the outside other than Sonya, and then a short-haired Mandy attacks!! Mandy chases Sonya and they brawl against the ring! Sonya tackles Mandy down but Mandy fights back! They end up in the ring, the ref has to throw this one out!
Mandy fires off on Sonya, Sonya hits back, the ref tries to stop this but Sonya shoves him away! Mandy tackles Sonya now, fires off more hands, but Heavy Machinery come in. They get Mandy back while Miz and Morrison get Sonya, but Mandy breaks free to tackle Sonya again! The brawling continues, the two teams pull the scrap apart, but Sonya gets free to tackle Mandy! Heavy Machinery get Mandy out of the ring to fall back, but this is far from over as SmackDown goes to one more break!
SmackDown returns to more brawling backstage!
Mandy and Sonya are NOT letting it end! Adam Pearce jumps in and shouts that they need to stop! Mandy just shouts at Sonya that Sonya should get closer so Mandy can rip every hair out of Sonya’s head! But then the lights go completely out, come back up, and something is happening ringside!! That group of anarchist maniacs, “The Retribution,” are invading SmackDown!! They’ve got pipes, bats and whatever else blunt to smack the ring! Run, Corey!! Run, Michael!! The five trouble starters take the ring, but they tell the camera man, “This is OUR house now!” Maybe you should leave and go home! Now the camera men are targets!! They run, leaving the cameras behind!
Now Retribution dares the crowd of NXT prospects to do something. And then they just go after them anyway! They mug one guy in particular, then dare a female superstar to do something. She tries to run but gets caught! The Retribution toy with her, then BOOT her down! And DECK her into the Plexiglas! Hair starts spilling out of the hoods but who are these five? They go back to the ring and shout, “This is OURS now!” They fires themselves up to TIP THE DESK! There’s a bag, and from it, is spray paint cans! The Retribution shake them up and start spraying on the boards. They spray an X through the WWE logos! And a line through the SmackDown logo! “All of this is OURS!” And then they produce a chainsaw?! They cut the ring apart, starting with the ropes! But who even are these five? And who can stop them?
Well damn. I’m not sure what to make of this episode, other than it was really wild. Between the extended recap, the Firefly Fun House segment and then the response segment, this story of Braun and Bray is continuing to take great twists. I don’t think they played up Alexa’s calmer reaction to The Fiend this week as much as they should have. Is it a sign that Alexa is herself starting to understand her role in this? And Braun saying he’s become a true monster, ditching the “among men” part because he’s no longer human, that was some quality stuff. I wonder if Alexa is used to cost him after all, as she and Bray doubt he was telling the truth about not caring about her. At the same time, that would just be another odd finish, and I don’t think WWE should do those anymore. The only match that ended 100% clean as Cesaro VS Lince.
Cesaro VS Lince was a great match, and it makes a lot of sense for Cesaro to win. Yes, Lucha House Party needs to look good enough to challenge the tag champions, but Cesaro’s power level is just that high that Lince wasn’t going to win. The intertwining stories of Sheamus, Riddle, Corbin and Jeff Hardy was all great, but again they all had less than clean finishes. In a vacuum, it works out great because Sheamus is riding the Tweener line against Corbin, a brilliant move, and all four guys could easily be fighting in a match to name a contender to the Intercontinental or even Universal Championship. But when you look at everything that’s happening for both Raw and SmackDown, very disappointing because it means WWE isn’t willing to commit to something right now.
I do love the position Stephanie is putting Bayley and Sasha in. Bayley is upset with Sasha for putting her up against Asuka, and she might just let Asuka win to avoid getting hurt. And now, a TRIPLE BRAND Battle Royal will name a contender, which is the best move because it means NXT still counts as the third brand when they haven’t really joined in on much since the Royal Rumble. Depending on who is in it, there might be some obvious favorites, but I hope this is a way to help someone rise up in the ranks. It could even be a way of moving an NXT female superstar to SmackDown.
The Dirt Sheet was so dorky but moderately funny. The better part, of course, was with Sonya and then the brawls and the tag match and all that. But for all the fire Otis had backstage, where was it in the match? He was basically the same as before! It feels like they forgot what they had him and Kayla and everyone else say when writing the match. Mandy’s return was great, and her cleaning up her haircut to be a nice short cut looks nice. Maybe they should’ve had Sonya do more to her hair so that she’d have to go even shorter. I fully expect a Mixed Six Tag before respective blow-offs at SummerSlam. This could even be Heavy Machinery’s way of moving into tag title contention.
And of course, the insanity that ended the night is the biggest thing. Miz and Morrison namedropping “The Retribution” and mockingly saying how they were just a Raw thing was all actually foreshadowing. As for what they did, it was the usual “this is kayfabe so no one is actually going to get hurt” level of violence. Nexus, for those who remember that, did WAY more damage. But remembering how Daniel Bryan choked Justin Roberts and that’s why Bryan was fired for that time, no “chaotic group” in WWE can ever go that far again. Which kinda hurts them being able to do these angles at all. Also, a chainsaw? I was more worried about the five people than the ring. And there could’ve actually been more chaos if SmackDown stars tried to overwhelm them before the chainsaw came out!
Meanwhile, it isn’t 100% clear who is under the masks and the hoods, but there are some subtle hints. For one, we can assume these are all NXT superstars who haven’t been on NXT for some time, because despite being called “The Retribution,” it is unlikely that WWE rehired superstars they released months ago. The ring leader could very well be Lio Rush, but that’s just a guess based on how he sounded while yelling. The hair of the one female member, that has to be Vanessa Borne. The other female member could be Chelsea Green, she fired Robert Stone and then just disappeared. No clue on the two that tipped the desk, though. Was there anyone we didn’t see in the crowd this time?
My Score: 8.3/10
Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (8/15/22)
A PHENOMENAL first-time-ever!
Will the United States Champion still be All Mighty?
For the first time one-on-one, Bobby Lashley takes on AJ Styles, and for the WWE United States Championship! Will the All Mighty prove he’s even more phenomenal than the Phenomenal One?
- Vacated WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship Tournament, Opening Round: Nikki A.S.H. & “Doudrop” Piper Niven VS Alexa Bliss & Asuka; Bliss & Asuka win and advance.
- The Miz & Tommaso Ciampa VS Cedric Alexander & Mustafa Ali; The Miz & Ciampa win.
- Drew McIntyre VS Kevin Owens; McIntyre wins, by disqualification.
- Veer Mahaan VS Beaux Keller; Veer wins.
- WWE United States Championship: Bobby Lashley VS AJ Styles; Lashley wins and retains the title.
- Dakota Kai w/ Iyo Sky & Bayley VS Dana Brooke; Kai wins.
- (Austin) Theory VS Dolph Ziggler; Theory wins.
PLAY BY PLAY
The Judgement Day is here!
Finn Balor, Damian Priest and Rhea Ripley are in Washington D.C. and headed to the ring! And they’re feeling great after what they did to Rey & Dominik Mysterio just last week. They all get mics while fans boo, but Rhea says, “The Judgement Day… We run Monday Night Raw. And that’s been the harsh reality to the Mysterios week in and week out. I even proved to Dominik Mysterio that I really am his Papi, haha, as I destroyed his soul!” Finn says everyone loves the Mysterios! But do they even know why? No! But then to those fans, Finn has some sad news: The Mysterios will NOT be here tonight.
And why is that? Because just like Rhea said, poor little Dom had his soul crushed! And Rey was destroyed by Finn in the middle of the ring, 1-2-3, to further solidify Finn’s already legendary status in this business! But enough about last week, here’s what Priest will do to Edge next week. “What won’t I do to Edge next week? But let me ask you all a question: Do you not wanna see Edge confront the Judgement Day right now?” DC says yes! Do they wanna see the Rated R Superstar right now? Yes! Too bad! He ain’t here! HA! No, no. Edge is out in Toronto, doing his “duties” promoting this match. Edge’s first match in Toronto in over a decade!
Priest tells Edge the he heard everything Edge said. Priest doesn’t need the Judgement Day ringside. He doesn’t sweat Edge! He doesn’t need anyone to deal with Edge! That is where Priest puts the final nail in the coffin of Edge’s career! There will be no Finn, no Rhea, just Priest VS Edge, 1v1, man to man, no Judgement Day! And then Toronto will no longer be Edge’s hometown. It’ll be the place where Damian Priest sent Edge back into retirement! Oh, the fans don’t like that, huh? Bye-bye, Edge! And this time it won’t be about filming TV shows or crap movies. It’ll be Beth wheeling Edge around and feeding him through a tube for the rest of his life!
But then REY dropkicks Priest from behind! And throws hands on Finn! Finn shoves Rey but Rey RANAS him out! Then BLASTS Priest out! But then Rhea steps to him! Rhea dares Rey to hit her, but Rey keeps control. But then Finn gets in with a chair! Rey SHOTGUNS Finn first! And then JAMS Finn and SMACKS Finn with the chair! And then the same for Priest! Fans fire up for Rey as he raises the chair, but Rhea shields Finn! Then she snatches the chair! Priest BOOTS Rey down! Priest KICKS Rey, rains down fists, and fans boo! But Priest drags Rey up, feeds him to Rhea, DDT to the chair!! Then Priest rains down fists!
Rhea tells this is what happens when Dom holds you back! Priest puts the chair on Rey’s chest! Finn is up top, COUP DE GRACE with the chair!! Finn sits on Rey after having crushed him! Will the Judgement Day destroy Edge just like they have Dom and Rey?
Vacated WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship Tournament, Opening Round: Nikki A.S.H. & “Doudrop” Piper Niven VS Alexa Bliss & Asuka!
This Celtic Connection of Almost SuperHero and Scottish Viper has been waiting for their opportunity to grab some gold together. As for the Five Foot Fury and the Empress of Tomorrow, they’ve each held the tag titles before, just with other partners. Who takes the crucial first step towards the gold and meets Kai & Sky next round?
But before the action gets going, the RawEST Women’s Champion, Bianca Belair, makes her way out to ringside! She’s going to be a teammate to Alexa & Asuka at Clash at the Castle against “The Control,” Bayley, Kai & Sky, so she’s here to cheer her allies on. Nikki & Piper then make their entrances, Nikki now sporting a leather jacket to match Piper’s. The teams then sort out and Asuka starts against Nikki. Asuka rushes in but Nikki throws her down! Nikki rains down forearms on Asuka then strikes a pose. Fans boo but Nikki stomps Asuka down. Nikki drags Asuka up, whips her but Asuka reverses and pop-up KNEES!
Nikki wobbles, Alexa tags in and she runs Nikki over! Piper gets in, Alexa & Asuka DOUBLE SHOTGUN her out! Then they both HIP ATTACK Nikki & Piper off the apron! High-five and fans fire up while Raw goes to break.
Raw returns and Nikki thrashes Alexa around in a straitjacket stretch! Fans rally up, Alexa fights up, but Nikki keeps her down by digging a knee in. Fans still rally and Alexa fights her way up again, getting her arms free to hit a JAWBREAKER! Piper tags in and drags Alexa away. But Alexa kicks Piper into Nikki! Hot tag to Asuka! Asuka goes up to missile dropkick Piper down! Fans fire up with Asuka and she dodges Nikki to DECK Piper! Asuka elbows Nikki, ROUNDHOUSES her, then hits a RUNNING NECKBREAKER! Asuka runs in at the corner to HIP ATTACK, then she waistlocks.
Nikki fights the suplex but Asuka BAKCHANDS, BACKHANDS, SOBATS, KICKS and BACKHANDS! GERMAN SUPLEX! Bridging cover, TWO! Nikki survives but Asuka sits Nikki up to KICK, KICK and run! Piper swipes at Asuka but Asuka BOOTS her! Nikki gets Asuka for a NECKBREAKER! Cover, TWO! Nikki is furious but fans fire up! Nikki goes to ropes, DECKS Alexa, then rushes back to get Asuka! Nikki whips her to a corner and Piper whips her in! Asuka puts Nikki on the apron, elbows Piper but Nikki shoulders in! Nikki climbs to CROSSBODY! Cover, Alexa breaks it with a dropkick! Piper CROSSBODIES Alexa!
Fans fire up while Dana Brooke & Tamina watch backstage. They lost last week, so what’re they hoping from this? Piper drags Nikki to her corner to tag back in! Piper storms up on Asuka, drags her up and scoops, but Asuka fights free! BACKHAND! Piper goes down, Asuka HIP ATTACKS Nikki away! Asuka comes back but into Piper’s scoop! MICHINOKU DRIVER!! Cover, TWO!! Asuka survives and DC is thunderous! Piper drags Asuka to a drop zone and she goes up the corner! VADER BOMB FLOPS as Asuka moves! Asuka drags herself up to her feet, Piper runs in but into a ROUNDHOUSE! Asuka runs Alexa tags, SLIDING KICK to a DDT!
Alexa hurries to tag Asuka back and she hits a CODE BREAKER! Oklahoma Roll, into an ARMBAR!! And Alexa intercepts Nikki with a RIGHT HAND! Piper taps, Asuka & Alexa win!
Winners: Alexa Bliss & Asuka, by submission (advance to the next round)
They may seem like an unlikely duo, but they just made it work here! And we get a Clash at the Castle preview within the tournament, will- Wait. Bayley and her team are waiting on the stage! They all applaud sarcastically and then talk some trash with Bianca, Asuka & Alexa. Refs and officials rush out already to stop this from blowing up again! Fans want to “Let Them Fight!” but will we just have to wait until next time?
Backstage interview with (Austin) Theory!
The Youngest Mr. Money in the Bank is back after the… less than successful attempt to cash-in at SummerSlam. Uh, well, he still has the briefcase, doesn’t he? And he’s still the Youngest WWE United States Champion Ever, and the handpicked future of the business! He may have made some miscalculations, but he doesn’t make mistakes. He is tougher because of that, wiser because of that, and he’s more dangerous because of that. Next time he- Dolph Ziggler walks in to say, “The next time? Kid, I’ve been watching you. You got crushed out there. Brock, Roman, you name it! And I get it, I’ve been there, too.”
But there’s a difference between the two of them. See, the MITB contract was never handed to Ziggler. He earned it. That is why it mattered when he cashed in and became World Heavyweight Champion! Well, that’s interesting. Ziggler was Mr. MITB, he was a world champion. And that’s great, really. But he won’t be around when Theory cashes in, and because of that, Theory thinks Ziggler’s nothing more than “an over the hill, title having has-been.” But Theory suggests Ziggler keeps paying attention to Mr. All Day. Because when Theory cashes in successfully, he’ll just keep winning and winning and winning. And he won’t screw up like Ziggler did!
Oh, didn’t like that, huh? But then Ziggler PUNCHES Theory! They brawl, and end up hitting the cameraman! Will these two have to settle this thing in the ring?
Raw shares footage of the brawl during the break, and they ended up deep in the arena! Officials rushed in to stop this, but… Who’s arm is that slipping in through the door?
Backstage interview with The Miz & Tommaso Ciampa.
Sarah says after an amazing performance against Bobby Lashley, where he came so close to winning the United States Championship, where does Ciampa see himself going next? Ciampa says he did get really close. Unfortunately, there are no participation trophies here. Ciampa came to Raw to become a champion, so the next time he gets an opportunity, that is what he is going to do. The Miz says to be honest, the only reason Ciampa didn’t win is because Styles interfered! And how is Styles repaid? He’s given a US Championship match tonight! That’s collusion!
But Miz will reward Ciampa for his valiant effort with a token of appreciation. Miz made his own custom polaroid NFT necklace. He and Ciampa have a matching pair! This is awesome! “No, we are AWWWWWESOOOOME!” The Hollywood A-Lister and his Guardian Psycho now head to the ring. Will they start on the road to tag title opportunities together? Or will they end up a stepping stone for their opponents?
The Miz & Tommaso Ciampa VS Cedric Alexander & Mustafa Ali!
The teams sort out and Alexander starts against Ciampa. They tie up, go around, and Ciampa pulls Alexander’s hair to put him on ropes. The ref counts., Ciampa lets off, and Alexander gets away. They tie up again, Ciampa headlocks, but Alexander powers out. Ciampa pulls hair to reel Alexander back in! Fans taunt Miz over his “TINY BALLS!” but Ciampa snapmares into a chinlock. Alexander slips out, hammerlocks an arm, and he leans on the hold. Ciampa fights up, reaches back to snapmare free, but Alexander slips out of the chinlock again! Alexander has the hammerlock, talks some smack on Miz, but Ciampa fights up.
Ciampa throws a hard elbow, then he clamps on the headlock for a takeover. Alexander keeps his shoulders up, fights up, and fans rally. Alexander powers up and out, but Ciampa runs him over! Things speed up, Ciampa slides under the hurdle but Alexander rolls off the back drop to DROPKICK Ciampa down! Tag to Ali, Alexander trips Ciampa for Ali’s slingshot senton! Tag back to Alexander and he slingshot sentons! Cover, TWO! Alexander drags Ciampa up, CHOPS him against ropes, then whips him to ropes. Ciampa reverses but Alexander kicks back! But Miz grabs at Alexander! Alexander DECKS Miz, dodges Ciampa, but handsprings onto a dropkick!
Miz and Ciampa applaud and pat themselves on the back while fans boo, but this new “Must-See Duo” are on top while Raw goes to break.
Raw returns as Miz fires off It Kicks on Alexander in the corner. Tag to Ciampa, he whips Miz in to A-LIST LARIAT! Then feed to Ciampa’s LARIAT, cover, TWO!! Alexander survives that combo but Ciampa clamps on a bulldog headlock! Fans rally up as Alexander endures and fights up. Ciampa swings but misses, Alexander fires off hands but Ciampa ROCKS him! Ciampa reels Alexander in, but Alexander suplexes first! Fans fire up and Alexander crawls over, but so does Ciampa, hot tags to Miz and Ali! Ali dodges, fires off CHOP after CHOP, then whips corner to corner. Miz reverses but Ali uses it to SHOTGUN Ciampa!
Ali slips out, ROUNDHOUSES Miz then slingshots and NECKBREAKERS on Miz! Cover, TWO! Ali drags Miz up but Miz YANKS him into ropes! Alexander tags in, he ducks Miz’s haymaker to back suplex but Miz lands on his feet! Alexander fights the full nelson to scoop and SLAM! Cover, Ciampa helps Miz get the ropebreak! Just like Miz has done for Ciampa! Fans boo and Alexander knows what happened! Alexander glares at Ciampa but Ali DIVES and sends Ciampa over the desk! Miz DUMPS Alexander out but Alexander shoulders back in! Slingshot sunset flip but Miz sit son it! Ale BOOTS Miz over! Alexander has the cover, TWO!!
Fans can’t believe Miz survives! Alexander hurries to tag in Ali, and Alexander drags Miz up. Feed to Ali, Alexander runs, but Ciampa dumps him out! Ali storms over but Ciampa gets away. Miz rolls Ali up, TWO! Ciampa tags in and Miz runs, into a SUPERKICK! Ali goes up but focused on Miz! 450 PSYCHO KNEE!!!! Then the underhooks into the FAIRY TALE ENDING!!! Cover, Miz & Ciampa win!!
Winners: The Miz & Tommaso Ciampa, by pinfall
WHOA! Miz has a bloody nose but he and Ciampa are the ones standing tall! Will it be a Fairy Tale Ending for the Hollywood A-Lister and his new co-star?
Ezekiel’s family responds to Kevin Owens’ brutal assault.
Not just Elias and Elrod, but their mother, father, and kid brother, too! Ernie Jr, says if he ever gets his hands on Kevin, he will get a piece of his mind!
Drew McIntyre heads to gorilla.
But as he does, someone is putting out a fire! Is that the work of Dexter Lumis…?
Drew McIntyre heads to the ring!
The Scottish Warrior may be part of SmackDown, but he’s here on Raw because Clash at the Castle is coming! And if McIntyre wins, he’ll be able to show up on Raw all he wants! For now, McIntyre gets a mic to say, “Washington, let me hear ya scream!” Fans shout for McIntyre and he says, “I know it’s a shock to see Drew McIntyre on Raw. I’m technically on Friday Night SmackDown. It might be even more shocking to see the other guy here on Raw, but that’s something we can rectify in less than three weeks’ time. Because at Clash at the Castle, it’s Drew McIntyre VS Roman Reigns for the Undisputed Championship.”
To finish McIntyre’s thoughts from Friday, this isn’t a match that happens on the fictional Island of Relevancy! It’s taking place on DREW’S island! And he is gonna drop Roman’s ass, win those titles, and then show up on Monday Night Raw, Friday Night SmackDown, the live events, everywhere the titles should be because that is what the fans and those titles deserve! And he knows there are reports that McIntyre is suffering from a back injury. To be honest, yes, it is true. Because he’s been carrying the load of 20 men for three years in the WWE, in the ring and outside it!
And he does it with a smile on his face because it is a PRIVILEGE. This isn’t a job, it’s a DREAM! That’s why he’s hereon his day off! McIntyre is here on Raw to scout the future opponents he’ll have! Wanna hear some potential ones? McIntyre VS Tommaso Ciampa! McIntyre VS AJ Styles! McIntyre VS Seth Freakin’ Rollins! McIntyre VS Karrion Kross! But here comes Kevin Owens! Kevin has a mic and McIntyre says he likes this idea, too! McIntyre VS KO! Kevin says it is so convenient that McIntyre says his name now.
But there is something about Drew that Kevin never understood. As big and good and strong as McIntyre is, he still feels the need to pretend he’s something he’s not. Because he comes out here, talks with his big, loud almost comical voice! Sometimes he has his kilt, sometimes he has a sword. He thinks this is Medieval Times? But McIntyre is delusional because if he thinks he’s been carrying anyone’s weight around here, he’s a real dumbass! Kevin says McIntyre has no idea who he really is! Kevin’s been the same person his entire 22 years of wrestling! He is and always will be Kevin Owens, who is as real as it gets in this business!
But these past few years, people have forgotten what Kevin’s about! That’s Kevin’s fault, though> he’s been having a good time, having fun coming to work. But then something dawned on Kevin when he got here today. He got goosebumps because he realized that this is the very same arena where at Battleground, Kevin and Sami Zayn had the fight of their lives and left everything they had in that ring! They gave people a match they STILL talk about six years later! And then Kevin realized there’s a side of him that’s been missing for far too long. He misses that side. He misses the old Kevin Owens. He needs to bring back the Prizefighter!
And Drew, Kevin hasn’t held a title in five long YEARS. But enough is enough, and it is time for a change! Now, Kevin is coming after everything! Every champion is a target! The US Champion, the Intercontinental Champion, the Tag Team Champions, and Drew, Kevin doesn’t care if it’s you or Roman. Whoever walks out of Cardiff has a hell of a problem, because Kevin wants the biggest prize of them all! The Undisputed WWE Universal Championship!! Fans cheer that, and McIntyre says okay, he let Kevin say his piece. And frankly, McIntyre will have to respond. McIntyre is sick of people making stuff up juts to get a reaction.
They say things like McIntyre doesn’t carry the load, he doesn’t know who he is. He knows exactly who he is, too!! Someone mocked him for being “The Chosen One.” That was 15 YEARS AGO!! Then he got FIRED, and had to work his ass off, earn his way back off! He didn’t call the WWE, they called him! And he’s worked his ass off ever since! A two-time world champion! He beat Brock Lesnar, Goldberg, Randy Orton and everyone who has stood in his path! Don’t you dare pull this BS again!! Now, it’s time for Kevin and McIntyre to stop talking. Prizefighter, sports entertainer, superstar, they’re wrestlers in a wrestling ring, so let’s just freakin’ wrestle!!
Fans are thunderous and Kevin tells McIntyre that he may not be a prize, but he’s still on! Kevin and McIntyre, a preview of coming attractions, who will win this fight?
Drew McIntyre VS Kevin Owens!
Raw returns and this is happening! The bell rings, they tie up and McIntyre puts Kevin in a corner. He lets off and welcomes Kevin to return, and the two reset. They tie up again, McIntyre pushes Kevin back but Kevin turns things around. Kevin lets off now and he circles with McIntyre again. Fans rally and duel and the tow tie up again. Kevin headlocks, McIntyre powers up and out, but Kevin RAMS him. McIntyre stays up and says, “Not today!” Kevin kicks low and says, “Shut up!” as he headlocks again. McIntyre powers up, powers out, and they RAM shoulders again. McIntyre says up Kevin’s, then kicks low!
McIntyre headlocks now but Kevin powers out. Things speed up, McIntyre RAMS Kevin and sends him flying! McIntyre stomps and punches Kevin in the corner, whips him corner to corner hard, then runs in. But Kevin elbows back and POSTS McIntyre! McIntyre sits down, Kevin says “SUCK IT!” and CANNONBALLS! Fans fire up and Kevin soaks it all up! “This is MY show!” Kevin drags McIntyre to a drop zone, then hits a SENTON, to a MOONSAULT! Cover, ONE!! Kevin grinds a forearm into McIntyre’s face, then stands on McIntyre’s hand. Kevin throws haymakers, then has McIntyre in a corner. Kevin RAMS his shoulder in as fans rally up.
The ref counts, Kevin lets off and brings McIntyre out. Fans duel, Kevin suplexes, but McIntyre blocks! And blocks again, to suplex Kevin and TOSS him! McIntyre says, “SUCK IT” back! Kevin bails out, so McIntyre builds speed! Kevin gets in to ROCK McIntyre! Kevin tosses McIntyre out, builds speed, but McIntyre ROCKS him! McIntyre brings Kevin up but Kevin fights the suplex! Kevin HOTSHOTS McIntyre, POSTS McIntyre, and McIntyre falls to the floor! Kevin steps back but then goes out to APRON FROG SPLASH!! Fans fire up and Kevin roars, “This is MY show!” as Raw goes to break.
Raw returns and Kevin has McIntyre down in a chinlock. McIntyre endures and fans rally up, but Kevin leans on the hold. McIntyre fights up, Kevin CLUBS him, and CLUBS him again. Kevin whips McIntyre corner to corner but McIntyre comes back to CLOBBER Kevin! And again! McIntyre whips, and OVERHEAD Belly2Belly suplexes Kevin away! Kevin gets to a corner but McIntyre clinches to OVERHEAD Belly2Belly again! And then McIntyre hits a NECKBREAKER! McIntyre kips up and fans fire up! McIntyre aims, Kevin gets up, and McIntyre underhooks, but Kevin wrenches out! Kevin kicks and hits a DDT of his own! Cover, TWO!
Kevin is annoyed but the fans rally up again. Kevin waits on McIntyre and then brings him around. Fans duel as Kevin whips, but McIntyre BOOTS back! McIntyre scoops Kevin but Kevin slips off to waistlock. McIntyre elbows free, runs in but Kevin BOOTS McIntyre down! Kevin goes up the corner again, for a SWANTON BOMB onto knees! McIntyre reels Kevin in to MICHINOKU DRIVER! Cover, TWO!! McIntyre is a bit surprised Kevin survives but the fans rally up again. McIntyre snarls as he stalks Kevin to a corner. McIntyre drags Kevin up, throws hands and CHOPS in the corner, then hoists him up top.
McIntyre ROCKS Kevin, climbs up after him, but Kevin trips him up! Kevin adjusts, throws haymakers, and McIntyre falls into the Tree of Woe. But he sits right up! Kevin fights the clinch and HEADBUTTS McIntyre down! Kevin hurries to CANNONBALL McIntyre out of the Tree! Then Kevin goes back up top, for the FROG SPLASH!! Cover, TWO!! McIntyre barely kicks out so Kevin goes right back up! SWNTON BOMB hits this time! Cover, TWO!!! McIntyre survives again! Kevin is beside himself but DC is thunderous! “This is Awesome!” as Kevin thinks of what to try next. Kevin paces, then decides to go up one more time!
McIntyre is right up! He ROCKS Kevin again and again, then climbs up after him! McIntyre fireman’s carries Kevin for a SUPER WHITE NOISE!! Cover, TWO!?! McIntyre is beside himself! But he goes to the corner and he wants Kevin to stand up. CLAY- SUPERKICK!! Kevin kicks, but no stunner! GLASGOW KISS HEADBUTT! SUPERKICK!! LARIAT!! Both men are down and fans are giving a standing ovation! Kevin gets to the ropes, McIntyre gets to his feet. Kevin and McIntyre just start throwing haymakers! They go faster and faster and it’s just a brawl! Fans are loving it as they get a second wind!
Kevin kicks low, whips, but McIntyre leaps out of the pop-up to turn and FUTURE SHOCK! McIntyre hurries to a corner, he takes aim again, but wait! THE USOS attack!!
Winner: Drew McIntyre, by disqualification
The Undisputed WWE Tag Team Champions do Roman Reigns’ dirty work! Jey drags McIntyre up, for a SUPERKICK from Jimmy! Jey then goes up top, and USO- NO! McIntyre dodges the splash, CLOBBERS Jimmy, then TOSSES Jey out onto Jimmy! A nasty landing for the Usos, but then Kevin returns! STUNNER!! The Prizefighter gets the last word, but then he tells the Usos to tell Roman that he owes Kevin one. But then the Usos pick the bones, ONE AND- HEADBUTT! McIntyre dodges Jimmy to CLAYMORE!! Turns out McIntyre gets the last word! Will the Scottish Warrior rip the Tribal Chief off the throne at Clash at the Castle?
Seth Rollins is here!
The Visionary promised he’d be here to hear from Matt Riddle just like the rest of us, but what will Rollins have to say about what Riddle has to say? We’ll find out, after the break.
Raw returns and Rollins has a mic. “I am a Visionary. I am a revolutionary. I am Seth! Freakin’! Rollins! HAHAHA! And I am excited because the time has finally come.” Riddle is getting mic’d up in his mom’s basement via satellite, and he’s about to give us his “big news.” So Rollins came out here for a front row seat so we can all celebrate together, when finally, for the first time in his life, Riddle does the smart thing and tells the entire world that he is retiring! HAHAHAAA! Don’t boo! This is cause for celebration. Riddle can do whatever he wants. He can go back to middle school and finish the seventh grade.
Riddle can start a farm! That industry is very lucrative these days. Riddle says he’s glad Rollins is out there so fans can see what a slimy piece of trash he is! But Riddle doe shave a medical update about his condition. Well here it is! The moment we’ve all been waiting for. Rollins knows this is very difficult for Riddle, so the fans need to be respectful. Riddle, please continue. Riddle says it is a bit hard to say this… But he’s MEDICALLY CLEARED! So the next time Riddle sees Rollins, it is on! Oh, okay, it’s on, huh? Next time they see each other. Like at Madison Square Garden? Or SummerSlam?
Because it seems to Rollins that any time they’re in the same place at the same time, the outcome is the same: Rollins stomping Riddle into the mat! And does Riddle know why that is? Because Rollins is always one, two, three steps ahead! Rollins wishes Riddle was here right now because Rollins would love nothing more than to stomp those last few brain cells out of Riddle’s stupid, stompable head! Well glad you feel that way, Rollins. Because Riddle is NOT in his mom’s basement. He is here in DC and the arena! SO he’ll head to the ring to kick Rollins’ ass!! Riddle is rushing to gorilla, here he comes! And then down the ramp!
Riddle slides in but slides out to avoid the stomp! He drag Rollins out and fire off hands! Fans fire up, Rollins RAMS Riddle into barriers but runs away. Riddle pursues to fire off KICK after KICK after KICK! Then a BROSPLODER! Rollins bails out, Riddle goes to the apron but Rollins trips him up! Riddle crashes down hard, and Rollins drags him back up to TOSS over the desk! Rollins rains down fists, clears off the desk, and then he drags Riddle onto it! “How stupid are you!? How stupid are you?!” Rollins CLUBS Riddle, then climbs up onto the desk! CURB- NO, Riddle dodges! Rollins falls over, Riddle KNEES him into the crowd!
Riddle then pursues, and they run up the bleachers! The fans cheer Riddle on as he runs Rollins off! But will Rollins have no choice but to take The Stallion on soon enough?
Backstage interview with Riddle.
Kevin Patrick says Riddle returned for the first time since Rollins’ SumemrSlam attack. Riddle knows all that, KP, but tonight was just a taste. Riddle is issuing a challenge! Rollins: Clash at the Castle! Be there! Will the Bro get to burn it down with the Architect in Cardiff?
Veer Mahaan VS Beaux Keller!
The Lion of India is on the hunt again, and DC’s own is on the menu! Will everyone from sea to shining sea come to #FearVeer?
The bell rings and Veer circles with Beaux. Veer rushes in, Beaux dodges, and then dodges again! Fans rally up as Beaux shows he can move. Veer rushes in but Beaux dodges again and then bails out! Veer chases after but Beaux gets back in the ring. Beaux plays keep-away as Veer gets back in, then Beaux DROPKICSK Veer! Veer shakes it off but Beaux throws a haymaker! And then another, only to get caught and TOSSED out of the ring! Veer then goes out after Beaux to choke grip and TOSS him back into the ring! Veer gets in and runs at the corner to SPLASH! Beaux staggers, into a FLYING THESZ PRESS!
Veer growls and stomps around, for the MILLION DOLLAR LARIAT! Beaux flounders, but Veer HIP DROPS, into the CERVICAL CLUTCH!! Beaux taps, Veer wins!
Winner: Veer Mahaan, by pinfall
Another battle, another win as another mere mortal falls prey to Veer Mahaan! Will even champions begin to #FearVeer?
Backstage interview with Dakota Kai, Bayley & Iyo Sky.
What can we expect from Kai’s first singles match here on Raw? Uh, Sarah, if you’ve been paying attention, you don’t need to ask that. Then for clarification, can she elaborate? Ugh, Bayley can’t believe this. For all the idiots out there, and for “clarification’s sake,” just please tell them. How is this: spoiler alert, she’ll win! That good enough? Sky says in Japanese and Bayley translates into English, you can expect them all to do a lot more winning when these two become the NEW WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions! And that means first, they beat Alexa & Asuka next week, and again at Clash at the Castle.
Kai then spots something and walks over. “Hey! Relax. We’re not here to ambush you,” Dana, Kai just wants to make sure she’s ready. Oh, Dana’s ready. She is ready 24/7! And if these three are trying to intimidate her, she is NOT afraid of them. Kai says fear is a motivator. Maybe Dana should be afraid. Kai, Sky & Bayley head out, but will #CobraKai sink her teeth into the Flex Appeal?
WWE United States Championship: Bobby Lashley VS AJ Styles!
Though they’ve battled in a tag team match, back when MVP was on the All Mighty’s side and the Nigerian Giant was on the Phenomenal One’s team, this is the first-ever 1v1 battle between these two icons! Who wins this dream match to say they are truly phenomenal?
The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and we see who carries the golden banner of this great country!
Lashley and Styles circle, feel things out, and Styles KICKS! And ROCKS and KICKS again! Styles has Lashley in a corner, he has the leg, but Lashley shoves him away! Lashley then runs Styles over! Lashley drags Styles up, bumps him off buckles, then throws back elbow after back elbow! The ref counts, Lashley lets off and hits a NECKBREAKER! Cover, ONE!! Styles is showing he’s tougher than that, but Lashley drags him back up. Styles fires off forearms, but Lashley kicks low! Lashley runs, but Styles hurdles and things speed up, Styles DROPKICKS Lashley down! Fans fire up while Styles catches his breath.
Styles drags Lashley around to drop an elbow on the leg! And another! Fans duel as Styles kicks the leg and paces around. Styles drags Lashley up, bumps him off buckles, but Lashley scoops and SLAMS Styles! Lashley drags Styles up now, throws him out of the ring, but Styles lands on his feet! Styles gets in as Lashley slides out, and Styles dropkicks Lashley away! Then slingshots, but has to bail out as Lashley moves! Lashley then fireman’s carries Styles to run, but Styles slips off! Lashley stops from hitting the post and he elbows Styles away. But Styles gets up on the apron to SLIDING KNEE! And then FLYING FOREARM!
Fans fire up as Lashley goes down! Both men are on the outside, catching their breath, and Raw goes to break.
Raw returns and Styles has Lashley in the corner again. Styles whips him corner to corner but Lashley reverses. Styles slides into the POST! Styles writhes but Lashley leaves him outside the ring as the count climbs. But then Lashley goes out at 5 of 10 to RAM Styles into the barriers! And then TOSS him into more barriers! Styles almost falls into the timekeeper’s area, but Lashley drags him up to RAM him! Lashley gets in the ring at 7 of 10 to refresh the count. He then goes back to get Styles and put him in the ring. Styles crawls to a corner, Lashley stalks after him. Lashley drags Styles up, throws back elbows, then stomps Styles down.
Lashley throws more elbows as the ref counts, and Lashley rains down fists! The ref backs Lashley away to check Styles but Styles says he’s still good to go. Lashley drags Styles up but Styles hits a JAWBREAKER! And an ENZIGURI! Fans fire up as Styles stands back up, and he stomps Lashley down! Styles hobbles, clutching his bad back. But Styles stomps Lashley more, runs, and drops a knee! Fans rally up while Styles grits his teeth and stands up. Lashley hits back with big forearm shots! Styles KICKS the leg, Lashley shoves him, but Styles KICKS him back! Styles fires off more hands and CHOPS!
Styles runs, but into a SPINEBUSTER! Fans fire up again as Lashley looms over Styles. Lashley drags Styles up, whips him to the corner again, and Styles SMACKS off the post from the top this time! Styles falls down, but here come Miz and Ciampa! Fans boo but Lashley drags Styles up. Lashley whips Styles corner to corner hard and Styles bounces off off buckles! Miz & Ciampa are ringside and Lashley glares at them. Fans taunt Miz over his “TINY BALLS! TINY BALLS!” but Ciampa covers Miz’s ears to tune that out. Lashley drags Styles up, reels him in and suplexes, but Styles blocks! And blocks again!
Lashley CLUBS away on Styles’ back, suplexes again, but Styles knees free! But Lashley kicks low to try again! He hangs Styles out to dry, then CLOBBERS him! Styles holds on, Lashley runs again, and he BLASTS Styles off the apron! Styles hits the ground hard, but Ciampa distracts Lashley! Miz sneaks up on Styles, drags him up, but DEXTER LUMIS jumps the railing!! Security jumps on Lumis and they spill over into commentary! Miz is shocked to see this and backs away while Raw goes to break.
Raw returns again and Styles has Lashley down now! It’s of note that Miz & Ciampa are gone from ringside. That’s because after Lashley gave Miz a Spear, the ref REJECTED Miz and Ciampa! Styles KICKS the leg and Lashley flounders. Styles drags Lashley up, kicks but Lashley blocks to ELBOW him! And a BIG lift for the COMPLETE SHOT! Cover, TWO! Lashley waits on Styles to stand up, Lashley runs in but is sent right out! Styles KICKS Lashley off the apron, then SLINGHOT FOREARMS! Direct hit and they’re down at the ramp again! Styles puts Lashley in the ring, blocks a punch to fire off the Phenomenal Blitz! LARIAT to SLIDING FOREARM!
Fans fire up behind Styles as he grimaces and gets back up. Lashley goes to the other corner, Styles runs in to SPLASH! And then fireman’s carry! But Lashley slips off and shoves Styles into the corner! Lashley CLUBS Styles, TOSSES him to the apron, but Styles shoulders back in! Styles KICKS the leg out, slingshots again, FALLING FOREARM! Cover, TWO!! Lashley keeps surviving these shots but Styles gets him up, Lashley RAMS Styles into a corner! And again and again! But then Styles BOOTS Lashley away! Styles runs, tilt-o-whirl, but into a POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO!! Styles survives and Lashley is surprised!
Lashley stalks Styles to a corner and hauls him back up. Lashley then hauls Styles up to the top rope! Fans rally and duel again and Lashley ROCKS Styles with a right. Lashley climbs up, brings Styles up in a clinch, but Styles slips out underneath! CHOP BLOCK, then a torture rack! TOWER HACKER BOMB!! Cover, TWO!! Styles’ back may have been a factor, but he stands up again. Fans rally, Styles brings Lashley up and reels him in, but no Clash yet! Lashley back drops Styles away! Lashley wants Styles to stand, but Styles doesn’t, so Lashley hauls him up to the Canadian Rack! CLIFFHANGER! Cover, TWO!! Styles survives again!!
Lashley gator rolls Styles to the apron and then fireman’s carries him. Lashley runs in to POST Styles! Styles helicopters to the floor! But Lashley isn’t done, he drags Styles up and into the ring. Lashley aims from a corner, runs in, but Styles KICKS the Spear away! Then rolls Lashley into the CALF CRUSHER!! Lashley endures but Styles pulls way back on the leg!! Lashley slips an arm inside the grip and breaks it, to get a HURT LOCK on the floor! Styles rolls it back to a cover, TWO!! Lashley lets Styles go in time, but Styles KICKS the leg! Lashley is in the corner, Styles runs in, “This is Awesome!” as Lashley puts Styles on the apron!
Styles ROCKS Lashley, prepares his armband, leaps but no Phenomenal Forearm! Lashley rebounds and SPEARS!! Cover, Lashley wins!!
Winner: Bobby Lashley, by pinfall (still WWE United States Champion)
That was a phenomenal battle with a MIGHTY ending! The title stays with Bobby Lashley, who will be next to step to the Rocky Mountain Machine?
Dakota Kai w/ Iyo Sky & Bayley VS Dana Brooke!
The Role Model has promised she, Kai & Sky will take control of Raw, and that is starting with the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship Tournament. Will #CobraKai show that the 24/7 Championship is beneath them?
The bell rings and Kai ties up with Dana. They are in a deadlock, but Dana waistlocks. Kai breaks free and PELES Dana right down! Kai waits on Dana to get up, and Kai BOOTS her against ropes! Dana flops down, Kai covers, TWO! Kai stays cool and she pushes Dana around. Bayley says to take control, and Kai whips Dana into the corner hard! BOOT WASH! Bayley wants commentary to talk about that! Kai covers, TWO! Kai snarls but Bayley says she’s so proud. Kai sits Dana up to fire off Kawada Kicks! Dana shoves her away but Kai kicks Dana around more. Dana throws more hands but Kai throws more kicks!
Kai whips Dana to a corner, runs in but Dana BOOTS back! Dana then elbows Kai, ducks ‘n’ dodges and fires off forearms! Dana hits a short arm LARIAT, then another! Fans fire up with Dana and she brings Kai up to whip her to a corner. Kai hits hard, Dana handsprings in and back elbows! Dana keeps moving, but the bulldog is sent into buckles! Kai runs in Around the World, BOOT!! Cover, Kai wins!
Winner: Dakota Kai, by pinfall
Bayley & Sky celebrate with Kai, they’re taking over one win at a time! Will they be truly in control once they get those tag titles?
(Austin) Theory VS Dolph Ziggler!
The Youngest Mr. MITB Ever may have missed his opportunity at SummerSlam, but there’s always Clash at the Castle! Will Theory show the Showoff that Theory is the future? Or will Ziggler show Theory that he still has much to learn in the present?
Raw returns and Ziggler makes his entrance. The bell rings and Ziggler TACKES Theory! They scrap, Ziggler gets around and has the SLEEPER! Theory flails but he’s already turning red! Theory pries free, rains down fists, but Ziggler slips around to body scissor! He makes it a cover, ONE, and Theory throws more hands! Ziggler pushes Theory away but Theory DECKS Ziggler with that left! Theory snarls and scowls and he looms over Ziggler. Ziggler gets to the corner, the ref backs Theory off, but Theory storms up on Ziggler to POST him! Theory seethes and he brings Ziggler out. Theory POSTS Ziggler again!
Theory drags Ziggler back in to say, “All day! You hear me? All day!” And he POSTS Ziggler again! Theory is snarling even more as he drags Ziggler to a cover, TWO!! Ziggler is still in this but Theory puts him on the ropes. Theory CHOKES Ziggler, lets off at 4, and then soaks up the heat. “This is my time!” Theory says Ziggler isn’t gonna last, but then Ziggler ROCKS and SATELLITE DDTs Theory down! Fans fire up as Ziggler and Theory are both on the mat. Ziggler gets to his feet while Theory goes to a corner. Ziggler drags Theory up to POST him in return! Theory flops to the apron then the floor and fans fire up again.
Ziggler shakes out his bad arm, goes out after Theory and smacks him off the apron! The ref counts, Ziggler puts Theory in, and he drags Theory back up to fire off haymakers. Ziggler throws body shots in the corner, lets off as the ref counts, and he hoists Theory up top. Ziggler climbs up after Theory now, and goes to the very top! But Theory holds the superplex off and throws body shots! Theory ROCKS Ziggler and he drops down! Fans boo but Theory tells them to shut up. Ziggler comes right back to SUPER FACEBUSTER! But Ziggler clutches his leg! Ziggler crawls to a cover, TWO!! Theory survives thanks to the delay, and Raw goes to break!
Raw returns again and Theory grinds Ziggler down in a chinlock. Fans rally up as Ziggler fights to his feet. Ziggler throws elbows into Theory’s ribs and then ROCKS Theory with a haymaker! And another! Both men stagger but Ziggler runs in, drop toehold into buckles! Theory storms around on the apron, takes aim and slingshots to somersault, and SHOTGUN! Cover, TWO! Theory is furious so he drags Ziggler up to POST again! Ziggler hangs out of the corner, but Theory drags him in. “I can do this all day! You’re nothing!” Fans rally for Ziggler but Theory keeps talking trash. Theory gets Ziggler up, suplexes, but Ziggler slips off!
Ziggler goes to a corner and UPPERCUTS back! Theory rushes in again, but into a BOOT! Theory tries one more time, but only gets buckles! Ziggler runs and LARIATS Theory down! And LARIATS again! And then jumps into the corner to rain down fists! Fans count and Ziggler goes way past 10! Ziggler turns Theory to a NECKBREAKER! And then a BIG elbow drop! Cover, TWO! Ziggler is beside himself but the fans rally behind him. Ziggler slaps some sense into himself, aims from a corner, and Theory slowly rises. SUPER- NO, Theory blocks the kick, shoves Ziggler away, but Ziggler ELBOWS him! Ziggler goes up but Theory CLUBS him down!
Theory torture racks Ziggler for a TOWERHACKER BOMB! Cover, TWO!! Ziggler is showing Theory just why he’s a Grand Slam Champion! Theory snarls, he goes to the apron again and fans jeer and boo. Theory fires up, slingshots again, but into a FAMOUSER! Cover, TWO!! Theory survives and DC can’t believe it! Ziggler facelocks Theory and drags him up. Ziggler ROCKS Theory, eggs him on, so Theory ROCKS him back! Ziggler ROCKS Theory, Theory ROCKS Ziggler, repeat! Fans fire up as the shots go back and forth, faster and faster! Theory kicks the leg, CLUBS away on Ziggler, fires off hands, but Ziggler kicks back! And a HEADBUTT!
ZIG- NO, no Zigzag, BIG LARIAT!! Theory calls his shot, he hauls Ziggler back up, fireman’s carries him, but Ziggler fights free! Sunset flip, TWO! Theory sits on it, TWO!! Fireman’s carry but Ziggler slips off to a ZIGZAG!! Cover, TWO!?!? Theory survives Ziggler’s best shot, is Theory backing up all his trash talk? Fans rally up as Ziggler and Theory stir. Ziggler sits up first and stands back up. Fans fire up as Ziggler is in the corner, and Ziggler tunes up the band! Theory rises, Ziggler rushes in, but no superkick! Roll up, FEET ONT HE ROPES!! The ref sees it just in time! Ziggler rolls Theory now, TWO!!
Ziggler kicks the legs, runs and FAM- NO! Fireman’s carry! A TOWN DOWN!!! Cover, Theory wins!!
Winner: (Austin) Theory, by pinfall
Fans boo but Theory just takes a victory selfie! Will the Youngest Mr. MITB continue to upset everyone as he continues to pull out victories?
Another great Raw, though I am curious as to what we got as the main event. Ziggler VS Theory was a great match, but I did not expect that to be what closes the show with how red hot a lot of other stories have been going. I did like that during the brawl between Theory and Ziggler that Lumis’ arm was in that doorway. It doesn’t outright indicate Lumis and Theory will reunite under The Way, but it doesn’t eliminate that possibility. And it seems Lumis is obsessed with AJ Styles. Lashley VS Styles was a great match, even with Miz & Ciampa showing up, but Lumis shows up at the end of another AJ Styles match, so Styles VS Lumis might be the feud after Clash at the Castle.
Miz & Ciampa also had a very good match against Alexander & Ali, and with Ciampa saying he will seize his next title opportunity, I wonder if Miz & Ciampa will help fill out the tag division for a moment since Usos cleared out quite a few other teams. And of course the Usos showed up to go after McIntyre. McIntyre and Kevin Owens had an awesome promo segment, and awesome match, but then the Usos had to “ruin” it. But McIntyre stands tall tonight, so who knows how heated it’ll get this Friday on SmackDown.
And while Kevin is returning to his old self, he also seems to have the added gimmick of claiming no one else knows who they are. I hope he gets to cut a promo on the entire Elias/Ezekiel family. I busted up at that picture they had of the whole family. I hope we get a Nutty Professor: Meet the Klumps kind of promo. Then, like Omos did before, Veer returned to do another squash match just so we don’t forget he exists. At this point, why not have those two guys interact. Omos VS Veer would be really tricky, though, because one of those monsters has to lose. A team of them would also be hard because how would the Usos survive them? At the very least, HHH should probably move one of them over to SmackDown so there’s more space for both of them.
Dakota also squashed Dana to kinda make a point that “The Control” (still not canonically named on TV) are higher up on the card. And we haven’t gotten any 24/7 Championship shenanigans lately, I wonder what HHH has planned for that title. We got a great opening match from the WWE Women’s Tag Team Championship tournament, Asuka & Alexa of course winning to then take on Kai & Sky next round. That is going to be a great match, just on Asuka and Sky finally facing off in the WWE. I would think Kai & Sky win to then win the tag titles before Clash at the Castle, but who knows. If so, I wonder if there’s a possibility of Winners Take All in that Six Woman Tag…
We got a good promo from The Judgement Day, and a pretty good brawl with Rey Mysterio, but of course Rey loses when it’s 3v1. I wonder if the Raw in Toronto will help push things towards Edge & Rey VS Judgement Day in time for Clash. And it seems Rollins VS Riddle is happening at Clash after not happening at SummerSlam. Rollins and Riddle had a great promo and a great brawl, they should have an almost show-stealing match.
My Score: 8.5/10
Mitchell’s AEW Dark: Elevation Results & Report! (8/15/22)
Minneapolis gets Elevated!
It’s a Superbad return!
Penelope Ford returns to action in AEW as Dark: Elevation serves the leftovers from Dynamite’s Quake by the Lake!
- Tony Nese & Josh Woods w/ Mark Sterling VS Travis Titan & Arik Cannon; Nese & Woods win.
- 8 Man Tag: The Dark Order VS T.U.G Cooper, Drew System, Rylie Jackson & Adam Grace; The Dark Order wins.
- Serena Deeb VS Sierra; Deeb wins.
- Konosuke Takeshita VS Cezar Bononi; Konosuke wins.
- Julia Hart VS Free-Range Kara; Julia wins.
- Private Party VS JAH-C & JDX; Private Party wins.
- Penelope Ford VS Heather Reckless; Ford wins.
- The Acclaimed VS Justin Fowler & JT Energy; The Acclaimed win.
- Six Woman Tag: Hikaru Shida & ThunderStorm VS Emi Sakura, Marina Shafir & Nyla Rose w/ Vickie Guerrero; Shida & ThunderStorm win.
Great to see Penelope Ford is back in action. I wonder if Kip Sabian will make his in-ring return soon. Unless he wants to keep stalking Pac a little longer as the box man… Private Party is going to get a win as the warm-up for their AEW World Tag Team Championship match this Wednesday, and pretty much the entirety of The Dark Order is in action in that 8 Man Tag. Konosuke VS Bononi is going to be really good. Bononi is certainly the biggest opponent physically speaking for Konosuke to take on, so we’ll get to see how Konosuke handles that situation.
Down The Wire: A Piece of Idaho w/ Gianna Cefalu
Tom and Dave are joined by KLEW TV Reporter, formerly of the PAC-12, Gianna Cefalu.
Down The Wire: NBA Scout Mike Vandegarde
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Down The Wire: Former Zappers QB Jason Stewart
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Down The Wire: Sell Josh Hader & Wisconsin’s State Fair Top 10 New Foods
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Down The Wire: Disappointments and Baker Mayfield
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Chairshot Radio: Musical Chairs S2:E2- Miles Davis & Black Star Riders 
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Bandwagon Nerds #144: Ezra Miller is Trash
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Andrew’s Judgmental Album Reviews: Cannons – Fever Dream (2022)
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Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu News Report! (8/14/22)
Fallout from Treasure Island 3!
Mitchell’s Hyrule Puro-Resu Results & Report! (8/13/22)
So! Much! Gold!
Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (8/15/22)
A PHENOMENAL first-time-ever!
Mitchell’s AEW Dark: Elevation Results & Report! (8/15/22)
Minneapolis gets Elevated!
Mitchell’s NJPW G1 Climax 32 Results & Report! (8/14/22)
Go Ace, or Go To Sleep?
Mitchell’s NJPW G1 Climax 32 Results & Report! (8/13/22)
Breathe with the Switchblade!
DWI Podcast #336: The Nose Job
This week we give our thoughts on the progressions of Liv Morgan as Women's Champion and Triple H as the...
Andrew’s IMPACT Emergence Results & Match Ratings: 8.12.2022
ALEX SHELLEY VS JOSH ALEXANDER! CHAMPIONSHIP! TONIGHT! 'NUFF SAID!
Mitchell’s AEW Rampage Results & Report! (8/12/22)
Rampage by the Lake!
Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (8/12/22)
Retro Greg DeMarco Show: Ranking The Championships In Pro Wrestling
Retro GDMS exactly two years ago...to the day! Enjoy this listing of wrestling's Most Important Championships!
Mindless Wrestling Podcast: WWE Talent Rehires, Transformers 36th Anniversary and much more!
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