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Andrew’s IMPACT Bound for Glory Results & Match Ratings: 10.23.2021

IMPACT decided to do themselves a solid, and AEW a solid by starting the show at 10pm eastern. How did Bound for Glory go this year? Was it…IInspirational?

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IMPACT decided to do themselves a solid, and AEW a solid by starting the show at 10pm eastern. How did Bound for Glory go this year? Was it…IInspirational?

We’ve got a bunch of title matches, some solid feuds, a Call You Shot gauntlet and a possible Uncle Rhino reunion! You probably know enough of the stories, so let’s get to the show!

Ratings:

  • Knockouts Tag Titles: Rosemary & Havok (c) vs The IInspiration: The IInspiration wins via Tandem Powerbomb/Neckbreaker – ***TITLE CHANGE!!!
  • Vacant X Division Championship: Trey Miguel vs Steve Maclin vs El Phantasmo: Trey Miguel wins via Meteora – *** ¼TITLE CHANGE!!
  • VBD vs Heath & Rhino: Rhino wins via GORE – ***
  • Call Your Shot Gauntlet: Moose wins via Lights Out – *** ½
  • Impact Tag Team Championship: Bullet Club (Chris Bey & Hikuleo) vs FinJuice vs Good Brothers (c): Brothers retain via Opportunistic Pinfall – *** ¼
  • Knockouts Championship: Deonna Purrazzo (c) vs Mickie James: Mickie wins via Tornado Mick DDT – *** ¾TITLE CHANGE!!!
  • IMPACT World Heavyweight Championship: Christian Cage (c) vs Josh Alexander: Josh wins via Ankle Lock – **** ½TITLE CHANGE!!!
  • CALLED SHOT: IMPACT World Heavyweight Championship: Josh Alexander (c) vs Moose: Moose wins via Lights Out – N/ATITLE CHANGE!!!

Results:

Jordynne Grace won the inaugural Digital Media Championship on their countdown show.

Knockouts Tag Titles: Rosemary & Havok (c) vs The IInspiration

Harley Cameron comes out to sing The IInspiration theme song live. It’s very much reminiscent of their IIconics intro, just with a better more early 00s pop music sounding theme song. Early on we see a little bit of the old IIconics shenanigans and the pose.

The IInspiration manage to try and keep Havok at bay, chopping her down and Low Bridging her to the outside which events things out a little. Rosemary catches Cassie with a Falling Powerbomb and goes to Havok. Havok lays out Cassie, but Jess breaks up the pinfall. There’s a bit of a scrum where they all get involved, then the IInspiration get cute and move which causes Havok to crash into the ring post.

Things move to the outside, they take out Havok, Rosemary tries to even things out but after a quick tag and the referee trying to get Jess out of the ring since she’s no longer the legal wrestler, Cassie connects with a vicious knee, then they hit a Tandem finisher and they have an iconic first night!

Vacant X Division Championship: Trey Miguel vs Steve Maclin vs El Phantasmo

After a small worthless cardio spot, ELP has his usual goofy heel antics, a trip, into an agreed upon Chip off on Trey. Then ELP tries to take advantage of things with applying the Purple Nurple to Maclin, but Maclin no sells.

Trey has a spot with Muta Lock transitions, but they are purely spots and not worth the time I’m spending writing it beyond “it looks cool”. Phantasmo goes into Super Carny mode, and he starts doing Springboad moves, rope walk, Cartwheel into Back Rake, goofy exit to the ring, Cartwheel again into another Back Rake on Trey. Then Maclin proves why he’s the glue in this match and just kicks them both, slows down the higher flying offense and pulls off a double power move for a near fall.

Maclin sets both guys in the Tree of Woe for two “In the Crosshairs” spots, ELP eats the Spear and powders, Trey counters, tries to put something together with a Back Handspring, but Maclin Spears Trey mid Handspring. Big moves from everyone eventually leads to Trey being in control a little. Trey misses his first in-ring attack, Maclin comes in to ruin the fun and hit Spicoli Driver. ELP powders, Trey and Maclin both look for a way to get things moving, they go to the corner, and ELP shows back up and pulls off a few flashy moves that leads to a Splash and near fall.

Maclin goes for Mayhem for All, Trey comes off the top with a Meteora, but Maclin drops ELP and catches Trey. Puts him down, eats a kick from Trey and then from ELP. Trey tries to Roll-Up ELP, but he kicks out. ELP goes for his Low Blow Punch, but Trey was wearing a cup. Buzzsaw Kick, deadlift Brainbuster, into Meteora, and Trey wins his first title in Impact Wrestling.

I suppose we’re supposed to care for the feel good aspect for Trey since they want him to be a babyface, but he’s just unlikable and pointless in the ring. So the story they want to tell, I suppose good for him, he’s still an awful spot wrestler with no psychology.

VBD vs Heath & Rhino

VBD come out cocky, Heath comes out first, and before they can even announce his partner, VBD attacks. Rhino is nowhere to be seen but Heath still wants the fight. Heath gets the best of Deaner, but Doering really beats on him.

Nice camera work helps the Running Crossbody from Doering look amazing. So Doering beats on Heath, brings Deaner back in, but Deaner misses the Headbutt and Heath has his moments. Heath lays out Deaner, they are both laid out, and then we hear Rhino’s music. Rhino comes out, asks for the tag from Heath, kills Deaner, Rhino and Heath both take out Doering, and the GORE on Deaner.

Decent match with a story that people will actually enjoy. I got kids Heath and Uncle Rhino, really resonated with the IWC. Let’s see if there’s a solid payoff, but this is a story that people will probably enjoy.

Call Your Shot Gauntlet

Chris Sabin is first because he was runner up in the battle royale on IMPACT!, but number 2….is ROCKY ROMERO! I always appreciate Rocky, and the fact these two guys are experts at the 90s/early 00s Junior style, this will be a great opening few minutes. Number 3 is…Madman Fulton. This is an interesting dynamic. Rocky and Sabin thankfully start working together, but number 4 is Rohit Raju, so he’ll have a plan. Seeing Rocky here makes me realize that Rohit would be amazing in New Japan.

The heels decide to work together, and then Tasha Steelz is next up. Rohit stops Tasha and wants her to help beat on the two downed Babyfaces. So that’s a great way to keep Tasha alive and in character without the size discrepancy seeming awkward. Rohit eliminates Rocky, and it’s a 3 on 1 against Sabin. Rachael Ellering is 6, so she’ll probably go after Tasha…yup. Rohit almost gets thrown out, but he stops himself. Fulton gets thrown against the ropes and Rohit starts losing his balance and grabs Fulton’s dreads to stay up. But as he’s pulling the hair, Sabin grabs the legs, Rohit manages to grab the rope and slide in as Fulton gets tipped over, partially because of Rohit’s handywork. Savannah Evans is next, so Tasha has her enforcer. Rachael takes out Savannah, but then Rachael gets eliminates by Tasha. Johnny Swinger is 8. Swinger slides in and tries to put some moves on Tasha. But Tasha isn’t amused by Swinger being…Swinger. Melina is number 9! It’s nice to see Melina since when we saw her before and around Empowerrr, she’s become a much better wrestler. Melina and Tasha go back and forth, Swinger tries to seduce Melina or something, but it’s not appreciated.

10 is…WAIT, the Kiss Demon is 10! I haven’t seen Dale Torborg in years, so I can only assume it’s still him. Swinger actually helps The Demon into the ring, because he thinks its Gene Simmons. So he asks for his autograph. The Demon signs it, “You’re Dead” and eliminates Swinger. Brian Myers is 11. Sheesh, it is one of those ‘only in Las Vegas’ type moments with The Demon showing up. Matt Cardona continues to follow Brian Myers places, so he comes out at 12. Laredo Kid in at 13, so that should mix up the styles in the ring. It’s been a while, but Melina eliminates Tasha, and then Myers eliminates Melina. Pfft, he’s such a dweeb.

Sam Beale is next at 14, he was just cut from Wrestler School. So as he comes in, Myers gives him an order, and Sam listens. Hopefully he gets a babyface moment later in the match and screws Myers, but he’s playing lackey at the moment going after Cardona. Rich Swann is number 15, so it’s not the worst number to draw. Myers tries to berate Beale, and Beale dumps out Myers! Ace Austin drew 16, even though Fulton was eliminated a while ago.

Demon tries to take it to Ace, but he’s too quick, catches Demon, rocks him and then gets low bridged, so Ace eliminates The Kiss Demon. Moose is 17 and charges in on Rich Swann. Sam Beale tries to sneak attack Moose, but Moose no sells and just throws Sam out into a pile of people. Eddie Edwards has 18. Alisha is 19 and brings two Kendo sticks with her. Moose meets her on the ramp, tries to stop her, but Eddie gets Kenny, so Kenny and Kendra start lighting up Moose. Massive Cassidy is last, but he gets met with Kendo Stick shots. Alisha gets picked up by Cassidy and tossed. Eddie holds on to the rope on the apron, but eats a massive boot and is out. Rohit tries to recruit Moose and Morrissey, but they just toss him.

Sabin gets rid of Ace, Fulton slides in, hits the End of Days on Sabin, Moose and Cassidy drop Sabin out. Cardona, Rich Swann, Moose and Morrissey are the final four. Morrissey has Swann on his shoulders, Moose eliminates them both. Moose and Cardona are the last two. Cardona turns Moose inside out, goes for an Avalanche Radio Silence, but Moose ducks, and comes out of the corner with the Lights Out. MOOSE WINS THE Call Your Shot trophy!

Impact Tag Team Championship: Bullet Club (Chris Bey & Hikuleo) vs FinJuice vs Good Brothers (c)

FinJuice have the early control and most of the fun. Juice is very audible, telling the referee he has the tag rope, calling the Oklahoma Roll in a comedic loud way, Randy Savage Double Axe Handle and a ‘high impact maneuver’. Chris Bey staggers Juice and he falls back to the Brothers so LG tags in and Bey tags in Hikuleo.

So we get the monster mash for a minute, as Leo gets the best of things, brings in Bey, but before anything can happen Finlay blind tags Bey and ruins any Bullet Club momentum. Finlay was getting rocked for a while until he brought in Juice. Juice was on fire, beating on Bey, landing the Juice Box for a near fall and being generally dominant. The big wipe out spots happen, FinJuice look to finish things in classic fashion. A little Power and Glory, but Karl Anderson lightly tags himself back in, so he chucks Juice out after they hit the tandem move, he pins Bey and retains.

Knockouts Championship: Deonna Purrazzo (c) vs Mickie James

Mickie starts before the bell, and goes to town. She’s jawing at Deonna about coming to her house, and stays aggressive all the way up the ramp. Deonna counters Mickie around the ramp and then starts dragging her back to the ring by the hair. Deonna starts to dominate, as they get back in the ring for the bell to officially ring, and Deonna stays on the offensive. Mickie can’t get a move in edgewise. Deonna rides her into the ground, throws her outside, and gets back on her. Mickie just can’t figure out an opening, Mickie even tries a Frankensteiner, but Deonna blocks it and Powerbombs Mickie.

Deonna talks shit to Mickie, they strike, simultaneous Crossbodies leave both women down, and then Mickie finally starts getting some stuff put together. Mickie hits her Frankensteiner, pulls out a desperation Mickie DDT, but can’t cover right away, so Deonna kicks out. Some more back and forth, Deonna lands a rope assisted Queen’s Gambit, but Mickie kicks out.

Deonna goes for a chair to protect her title, but the referee stops her. Deonna manages to pull the referee into the way of Thesz Press, so the referee bump gives Deonna and idea. She goes to the chair again, Mickie hits the Mick Kick into the chair, but only a near fall. Deonna gets vicious, goes after the left arm more brutally ripping Mickie off the top rope by her arm but she gets cocky. Deonna wants to rub it in, so she mocks Mickie by attempting the Mick DDT, Mickie spins out, Mick Kick, Tornado Mick DDT, and Mickie wins!

So with the main event upcoming, my bias is showing a little. I enjoy Josh Alexander, but with Moose wining the call your shot, I’d personally like to see Christian retain tonight, but Moose cash that in immediately if that’s within the rules. I don’t remember if it’s supposed to be a legit match or if it’s like a briefcase, but Moose should be the one to bring the title home.

IMPACT World Heavyweight Championship: Christian Cage (c) vs Josh Alexander

Early on this is the clash of styles so to speak. Josh focused on keeping a deliberate pace and trying to out wrestle Christian. Since Christian came in with his shoulder taped, Alexander had some focus on the injured area, but also hunted for his bread and butter Ankle lock early on. Christian’s major game plan really seemed to be using veteran savvy and Alexander’s inexperience in the moment to his advantage.

Every times Alexander put a few things together, Christian could keep it simple and normally have a counter. One of my favorite spots being Josh pulls off the Chaos Theory German Suplex, but Christian kicks out, then as Josh is getting back to his feet, Christian stays seated an simply kicks Josh’s legs out from under him and going for a Rear Naked Choke. Which forced Josh to counter it into a pinfall attempt, just to make sure the pinfall got broken.

Josh went for big spots, occasionally he let his emotions get the best of him and seemingly rushed his advantage, and Christian made him pay. So it played into the story well. They fight toward the corner, Josh manages to drop Christian, go for a Moonsault, but missed! Christian tries the Killswitch, but Josh fights it off, Christian charges into the corner and Josh moves, but Christian hits the banged up shoulder. Ankle Lock attempt to drag Christian down, but Christian fights. He crawls to the ropes, but Josh pulls him back, he tries to turn, but Josh won’t relent, Christian tries to reach out or press up with the bad arm, and can’t lift it. Josh keeps the Ankle Lock in, steps on Christian’s good hand, Chrisitan can’t move himself with the injured arm, and taps out.

Josh is overcome with emotion, Matt Striker on commentary seems choked up, Josh’s eldest son and wife come into the ring to celebrate…but off camera Moose slid into the ring and called his shot! Josh tries to get his family out of the ring, but his wife shields the kid in the corner, Josh turns as the bell ring, LIGHTS OUT, and Moose is the new-new IMPACT Champion!

I mean…not EXACTLY how I wanted it, but I’ll take it. Moose being champion is all that matters to me.

Overall Score: 8.25/10

Stories were paid off, feel good moments, villainous moments and titles changes hands. All in all, what else can you ask for in a show? Plus there wasn’t a “bad” match on the entire card. The main event did a great job at making Josh out to be a hero, but then Moose became an even bigger villain than he already was. ESPECIALLY with the added effect of doing it in front of Josh’s wife and small son.

Mickie being champion again is a great reset in a way, Deonna already lapped the field and if she retained than they’d have to call Manami Toyota, Mayu Iwatani, Arisa Nakajima…or someone credible from other countries to challenge her. Plus everyone loves Mickie, and she can still go, so it’s not like it was putting the title on an old vet for no reason. The IInspiration also do a great job at making their debut matter, and maybe being able to breathe some life into the rather lame Knockouts Tag Division.

Good Brothers are gonna Good Brother, but I’m assuming this is just a slow roll to get the Guerrillas of Destiny over to Impact for their big Bullet Club blow off. Digital Media whatever…I don’t know what they’re gonna do with that, I don’t have high hopes…but it’s unique I guess. Oh and Trey Miguel finally won something. I mean…someone prolly likes him…like his mom from last year’s storyline probably likes him. Maybe a title reign can help him figure things out since he won’t be the underdog anymore, but I really don’t have faith in his ability to make a match make sense.

My unbridled disdain for Trey Miguel aside, it was a really solid show. The last two matches were great, the main event proves that Josh Alexander should be in the running for Wrestle of the Year. Any of his matches that have gotten time, have been fantastic. Chris Sabin, Jake Something, Christian Cage; just a few of the matches that come to mind that were awesome with him this year.

Here’s to looking forward to what they do next!


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More From Japan

NOAH WEEKLY NEWSLETTER VOL.187 ~ 29TH SEPTEMBER 2022

Keiji Mutoh continues his Retirement tour and bringing out faces from the past! NOAH has a new champion! Interesting inter-promotional battles on the horizon as well!

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NEWS

Kaito Kiyomiya is the new GHC Heavyweight Champion, nominates Kazuyuki Fujita as challenger

Following provocation by Kenoh not only saying that he was going to be the one to inherit Keiji Mutoh’s Shining Wizard and the memory of Keiji Mutoh himself (and the outright claim that Kiyomiya would simply forget about Mutoh once Mutoh had retired, which Kiyomiya didn’t even bother responding to), Kenoh went one step further at their last pre match on the 19th September by pulling Keiji Mutoh’s pose, kissing his hand, putting it to Kiyomiya’s lips and then exploding it. Kiyomiya erupted in fury at this, it was far more than any verbal provocation of Kenoh’s, which I guess he has learned to ignore over the years. They fought for the GHC Heavyweight in Nagoya on September 25th, with Kiyomiya emerging victorious following a modified Shining Wizard. As Kenoh left it was like a spell was broken. Kenoh went backstage and muttered about Kiyomiya being the company favorite and in his interview the day after winning the title, Kiyomiya said nothing about Keiji Mutoh. Mutoh as we know had been a focus of both Kiyomiya and Kenoh leading up to the title match.

Back in the ring, Kiyomiya called out his next opponent. Kazuyuki Fujita. Fujita came to the ring, carrying a can of beer which he swigged from. Getting in the ring he circled Kiyomiya and took off his t-shirt. Kiyomiya said that he was expecting a fight, but Fujita did something that no other NOAH wrestler had (or perhaps would) do, and that was to throw himself at Kiyomiya and then make nuzzling motions against his head, while he licked the belt. Kiyomiya pushed him off, and Fujita retaliated by pouring beer over his head.

Kiyomiya screaming that he hated beer was met with Fujita toasting him from the ramp and yelling “Kampaiii” (“cheers”) after a fight had broken out, and Kiyomiya threw him from the ring.

 

Backstage, Kiyomiya said his reason for nominating Kazuyuki Fujita as his challenger was that he had never been defeated for the GHC Heavyweight. Fujita had to give up the belt due to Coronavirus. It has been a recurring theme of most of the GHC Heavyweight champions since Go Shiozaki, that Fujita has been the man to beat in order to cement yourself as champion. Kiyomiya was picking up that torch.

As for Fujita, he played it as if he was a Casanova and had been asked out on a date by warning Kiyomiya that when you experience Fujita, you can never go back because you were never going to be the same. He was going to “make it a night to remember”. He sipped his beer, and licked his lips afterwards.

Title match has been set for NOAH’s return to Ariake on the 30th October.

STINGER lose, NOAH Junior Regulars win, enter Tadasuke (with a chair)

Following a period of brutal attacks on Seiki Yoshioka (by the end of the match he could hardly use one side of his body) and a title challenge where Atsushi Kotoge was bloodied up, The NOAH Junior Regulars emerged victorious and bought the tag titles home to their unit. They had very little time to celebrate their win and put ice on their wounds, when Tadasuke burst in and attacked Atsushi Kotoge with a chair while Hi69 beat up on the already incapacitated Seiki Yoshioka. Tadasuke (wild grin on his face) got on the microphone and made a challenge for the tag titles. Then Tadasuke wiped the blood from Kotoge that had got on his hands on his hair, leaving red streaks in the peroxide. Tadasuke was even waving the bloodied seat of the chair, which had detached during the attack, around backstage.

Title match will be on the 30th October when NOAH return to the Ariake complex.

Takashi Sugiura and Satoshi Kojima, NOAH’s most dysfunctional tag team, win the GHC Heavyweight tag titles

It must be said that with the combined efforts of Satoshi Kojima and Hideki Suzuki, we almost have our Sugi back.

At the press conference/title match signing, Sugi and Kojima appeared dressed in suits and wearing dark glasses. They looked something between The Men In Black and “Dangerous Detectives” (as Tokyo Sports called them  which stems from a Japanese TV show). Hideki Suzuki was on form, not only mistranslating Timothy Thatcher and stating at one point that Thatcher said he came to Japan to “beat you up” and being rude to a journalist for being overfamiliar with his “punk mouth”, the highlight of the press conference was his long close up stare at Sugi, who was trying not to laugh.

The dysfunctional team won the titles in Nagoya on the 25th September, and despite their falling out during the match, Sugi actually gave Kojima a proper handshake. Then they went back to squabbling backstage over Kojima talking on the mic when it was Sugi who got the win. No challengers have come forward as of yet.

HAYATA retains the GHC Junior, Ninja Mack makes his long awaited challenge

It had been an emotional match for YO-HEY, and for fans. Cutting out the aerial techniques that had characterized their earlier matches, both he and HAYATA demonstrated how much they had both evolved by concentrating on a more NOAH based ground attack with submissions. YO-HEY might have failed in the challenge, but he had at least gotten one win over HAYATA in the pre-match. He knew the title match would be different and he would need to level up, and afterwards he reflected and said he would start from rock bottom in order to make his next challenge. What fans had noticed that while things had changed between them, some things were the same, such as YO-HEY coloring his hair, his tongue (and even his boxer shorts) purple, which is HAYATA’s color, and HAYATA not speaking as much as he has done in previous title challenges, as he is content to let YO-HEY talk. After the match, Ninja Mack came to challenge. HAYATA accepted by saying, that he was “finally interested in the belt” and acknowledging him as challenger. Title match will of course be on the 30th October. But HAYATA is not immediately going into a fallout match with Ninja Mack at NOAH’s next event on the 30th, but is having a tag match against YO-HEY.

Keiji Mutoh’s Retirement Road

Keiji Mutoh has been very busy.

– 23rd September: Great Muta appears in AEW

The Great Muta made a surprise appearance in AEW to rescue Sting, who had been tied to a chair by Darby Allen. Muta came to the ring, advanced on Sting and then turned and spat green mist into the face of Allen and then reunited with Sting. Keiji Mutoh announced that Sting would attend Muta’s retirement on the 22nd in Yokohama, but has not said in what capacity, although it is assumed that they will tag. Regarding any further appearances in America, Mutoh said he didn’t think it was likely, but did warn that The Great Muta may pop up somewhere as you never knew where he would turn up next.

– 25th September: Keiji Mutoh Retirement Road: Love Forever 2

Keiji Mutoh teamed with his junior Kazuyuki Fujita to take on Mutoh’s classmate, Masakatsu Funaki and Katsuhiko Nakajima, who Mutoh has known since he was a boy, and still calls affectionately “Katsuhiko”. Nakajima said he was going to break up this class reunion, and while Mutoh did get kicked (Nakajima smirked and said it was fun when Mutoh later complained his leg still hurt) but it was Fujita who got the worst of it. During the match, Nakajima pulled out Mutoh’s Space Rolling Elbow. Mutoh was initially not pleased, but then he became very happy to see it and said that he thought that “Katsuhiko” did it because he had some small measure of feeling for him. I think had Nakajima been a more acrobatic wrestler, Mutoh might have handed it to him. Mutoh won the match with The Shining Wizard, pinning Nakajima. This was Mutoh’s farewell to Nagoya, his classmate, his junior and Nakajima.

– 26th September: Hiroshi Tanahashi comes to the press conference and a tag match is announced

Hiroshi Tanahashi presented 38 roses to Mutoh when he came to the press conference. Each rose symbolizes a year of Mutoh’s career. Mutoh joked that he should have laid them at his feet, as had happened in boxing recently. Tanahashi said he wasn’t good at ad-libbing, and then introduced himself as “one of the greatest New Japan talents in the past one hundred years”. During the press conference, a tag match was announced. New Japan’s Hiroshi Tanahashi, Togi Makabe and Honma Tomoaki will team together against the team of Naomichi Marufuji, Keiji Mutoh and Keiji Mutoh. This will take place on the 30th October. Mutoh has not given up hope of appearing one final time in the New Japan ring.

– 16th October: A new match is announced

NOAH announced that due to fan demand, Keiji Mutoh will be appearing in Fukuoka. He will tag with Ninja Mack and Satoshi Kojima against Naomichi Marufuji, HAYATA and Jack Morris. Satoshi Kojima is of course connected to Mutoh through All Japan and New Japan, Naomichi Marufuji has wanted a match against Mutoh (he will be tagging with him as we know on the 30th October) and HAYATA has been a big fan of Mutoh for a while, as he has influenced a lot of his style and persona. HAYATA thinks of himself and The Great Muta as “The Phantom Team”. Muta doesn’t like to speak and HAYATA said, neither does he.

Naomichi Marufuji and Katsuhiko Nakajima head overseas

Naomichi Marufuji and Katsuhiko Nakajima will appear for Evolution Pro Wrestling in New York for their anniversary show on November 12th. Marufuji’s match is yet to be announced, but Nakajima will take on Josh Alexander. Alexander has said he wonders how Nakajima is going to kick after he snaps his ankle. They will also appear at King of Indies in San Francisco on November 19th.

NOSAWA vs Katsuhiko Nakajima (and Kenoh)

After being beaten up by Katsuhiko Nakajima who gave him some pretty stiff soccerball kicks outside the ring at Korakuen Hall recently, (although he would tell you that Nakajima tried to beat him up), NOSAWA Rongai has been on a quest to face Nakajima in a match. Then he threw in Kenoh, so it could be himself and Eita versus Kongoh. Hideki Suzuki told him that he was probably going to die, but NOSAWA has taken no notice and kept on with his demand. His demand has not been met because rather than facing Nakajima and Kenoh, NOAH have booked him against rookies Yasutaka Yano and Kai Fujimura. NOSAWA thinks he is having to go through some kind of trial.

ELSEWHERE IN NOAH

– Hideki Suzuki has hinted that perhaps Takashi Sugiura might like to get back online.

– Yoshiki Inamura and YO-HEY continued their guild, despite the fact that YO-HEY said someone attacked and burned their castle down. A picture was taken of YO-HEY and Inamura playing the game, with YO-HEY seated cross legged on Inamura, who was doing a bridge in the ring. We have seen Inamura used as a weight, but is he now used as furniture?

– NOAH’s Director, Narihiro Takeda, wrote on a NOAH Note that he would like for Darby Allin to come to NOAH one day.

– Tadasuke got a match thrown out by ripping off Alejandro’s mask. Tadasuke did not care, and did not even respond when Alejandro asked if he wanted a mask for himself?

– Daiki Inaba had his long awaited singles match with Katsuhiko Nakajima, but failed to revenge himself for Nakajima’s behavior in W-1. Nakajima even went for the cocky pin by grinning and leaning on Inaba.

– There was usual chaos at the NOAH Junior Space sessions as Daisuke Harada is not there to take control. Atsushi Kotoge seems to be the main culprit, forgetting to invite Seiki Yoshioka in and at one time even failing to press record.

– It’s probably best that Daiki Inaba, who apparently likes to be in the nip backstage, was not present when NOAH was at Differ. It was bad enough that Sugi used to wander around naked…

– Mitsuharu Misawa wrote in a diary entry for 2006 about filming an advert for THE LEAVE, and having to sing first thing in the morning while they were filming. Probably due to the fact that he had a problem with his throat anyway, was a heavy smoker and had taken “so many chops and kicks” to it in his career, he said he sounded very hoarse.

EVENT RECAPS AND POST MATCH PROMOS

SUNNY VOYAGE – September 19th 

Event recap

Post match promos

N-INNOVATION – September 21st 

Event recap

Post match promos

GRAND SHIP 2022 IN NAGOYA/KEIJI MUTOH RETIREMENT ROAD – September 25th

Event recap

Post match promos

CURRENT CHAMPIONS

  • GHC Heavyweight Champion: Kaito Kiyomiya
    Challenger: Kazuyuki Fujita, [Muto Retirement Road] ABEMA presents Ariake Gaisen-THE RETURN-PRO-WRESTLING LOVE FOREVER . 3 ~TRIUMPH~ Sunday 30th October, Ariake Arena, Tokyo
  • GHC Junior Champion: HAYATA
    Challenger: Ninja Mack, [Muto Retirement Road] ABEMA presents Ariake Gaisen-THE RETURN-PRO-WRESTLING LOVE FOREVER . 3 ~TRIUMPH~ Sunday 30th October, Ariake Arena, Tokyo
  • GHC Heavyweight Tag Champions: KojiSugi (Satoshi Kojima & Takashi Sugiura)
    Challengers: TBA
  • GHC Junior Tag Champions: The NOAH Junior Regulars (Atsushi Kotoge & Seiki Yoshioka)
    Challengers: Kongoh Juniors (Tadasuke & Hi69), [Muto Retirement Road] ABEMA presents Ariake Gaisen-THE RETURN-PRO-WRESTLING LOVE FOREVER . 3 ~TRIUMPH~ Sunday 30th October, Ariake Arena, Tokyo
  • GHC National Champion: Masakatsu Funaki
    Challenger: Masa Kitamiya, SUNNY VOYAGE 2022 – Friday September 30th (Bandaijima Multi-Purpose Square Ogama)

(This event will not be broadcast live, but hopefully this match will be shown via Instagram)

THIS WEEK IN NOAH

(October 2022 schedule)

– Friday, October 7th

STAR NAVIGATION 2022 – Korakuen Hall, Tokyo

Time: 18:30 JST

Broadcast: WrestleUniverse/ABEMA (live)

– Saturday, October 8th

STAR NAVIGATION 2022 – Korakuen Hall, Tokyo

Time: 18:30 JST

Broadcast: WrestleUniverse (live)

Note about broadcasts

Unless you are living in Japan or have a VPN you know is compatible with ABEMA, please do not subscribe to the service. For fans living outside of Japan, a subscription to WrestleUniverse would be better as they show more NOAH shows than ABEMA, and usually the events get uploaded very quickly. ABEMA broadcasts are only in Japanese, you can only watch them live, and this is the only NOAH they show. They do not broadcast old shows as these belong to Samurai TV.

BIRTHDAYS & ANNIVERSARIES

Wednesday, 5th October: Keiji Mutoh debut anniversary (38)

Wednesday, 5th October: Seiki Yoshioka debut anniversary (14)

LINKS

“I want to protect this belt for the rest of my life”, new GHC champion Kiyomiya holds morning press conference to establish a new NOAH landscape

Mutoh’s Retirement Road, tag match against Tanahashi in round three: “I want to grab the secret of secrets”, Tanahashi presents 38 roses

Great Muta teaming up with Sting for last match? “Agent” Mutoh’s opinion 

“I wonder if I can transmit more” YO-HEY aims to revitalize the junior ark with his first championship

AEW Shock! Great Muta appears in America! Rescues Sting and shake of hands

“Follow Me You Bastards” – Kenoh’s Weekly Pro Column

GHC Junior Match Signing: YO-HEY “Last Chance, I don’t think as my ex partner now”, HAYATA “I don’t feel anything”

“Taka & Satoshi” reveal a “dangerous detective” look, mischievous Suzuki is a reckless interpreter, the GHC tag signing ceremony is thrown into chaos by bizarre question and answer between the two teams

 A “Comrade” and an “Older Brother”, Masakatsu Funaki talks about his thoughts on Mutoh’s retirement, “I want to kick him mercilessly”

BOOK CORNER

“Donmai, Donmai” – Mitsuharu Misawa’s diary

With thanks to: Metal NOAH

GIF taken from WrestleUniverse & NOAH Official YouTube

Picture credit: YO-HEY & NOAH.co.jp


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Coverage

Andrew’s IMPACT Wrestling Results & Match Ratings: 9.29.2022

Bound for Glory is 8 days away, but Victory Road just happened. What kind of show do we get with some fallout and penultimate hype?

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Victory Road just happened, but Bound for Glory is like 8 nights away? You know I forgot that it was such a quick turn around. That makes tonight weird, since there’s some fallout, but then there’s gonna be a lot of table setting for Bound for Glory.

This episode could be awful. The last week or so haven’t exactly set the world afire, so I’m curious if the highlight really is just gonna be the Monster’s Ball with Masha and Allie Katch.

*insert joke about possibly gagging and balls and Swinger’s Dungeon*

Ratings:

  • Bullet Club (Ace Austin & Chris Bey w/Juice Robinson) vs Trey Miguel & Laredo Kid: Bullet Club win via Finesse & Fold – **
  • IMPACT Digital Media Championship: Brian Myers (c) vs Crazzy Steve: Myers retains via Roster Cut – ** 1/2
  • Delirious vs Black Taurus: Black Taurus wins via Destination Hellhole – ** 1/4
  • PCO & Vincent vs Rich Swann & Heath: Rich wins via Phoenix Splash – ** 1/4
  • Pick Your Poison: Monster’s Ball Match: Masha Slamovich vs Allie Katch: Masha wins via Russian Death Device – *** 1/2

Results:

Bullet Club (Ace Austin & Chris Bey w/Juice Robinson) vs Trey Miguel & Laredo Kid

I don’t think I could care less about this match if I tried. Trey and Laredo are worthless. Laredo has eaten so many terrible losses and Trey is just bad. If the BC Juniors don’t win…I will really question the booking.

My biggest takeaway early is the commentary tries to put over Trey “turning heads”. No he doesn’t, he is legitimately hard to watch and everything that Will Ospreay did wrong in his early career; is basically Trey, but with less personality. Oh did you expect play by play? They isolate Laredo, decent tandem attacks, when Trey comes in it’s bad offense typical Cruiser garbage with laughable facials and body language.

Just typical crap with Trey. Were there some cool high spots? Sure. Do I care? NOPE.

IMPACT Digital Media Championship: Brian Myers (c) vs Crazzy Steve

Steve starts with some of his quirky mat wrestling, Arm Wringers into Drop Toe Holds and face biting. It shocked Myers early, but he takes a small shortcut and starts trying to slow down the psycho from Decay. Steve bounces off the ropes and Myers does his sliding trip move before commercial.

Back from commercial, Snapmare from Steve and the neck twister into some corner offense of Hip Attacks and Sentons for 2. Myers dodges King Kill 33, lands a few pot shots, Implant DDT for 2. Into the corner, face bite, Upside Down, after the rope break Myers grabs the referee to block Steve. Eye Poke, Roster Cut, AND STILL…

Simple, but entertaining. Plus it continues Myers’ arrogant, full of himself for absolutely no reason persona. Oh and he offers up an Open Challenge for Bound for Glory. Maybe Bobby Fish? Someone new? Could be interesting. 

Delirious vs Black Taurus

Delirious is between gibberish and Stone Cold early on while they’re just trading shots. Delirious twists the Nose Ring…in the mask…and Taurus sells it momentarily before stomping the foot and decking him. This is just a weird match. I mean we all know Delirious is weird, but he’s not all comedy; and Taurus is supposed to be legit-ish.

Admittedly, with the exception of Victory Road, it has been years since I’ve watched a Delirious match. So the level of ridiculousness has hit Toru Yano levels, especially after the 10 count Leg Drops. Taurus powders, comes back in, Shoulder Tackle, Blackhole Backbreaker into a Samoan Drop. As soon as Taurus looks in charge, Delirious throws together a combo, eats a Headbutt and then Destination Hellhole.

Sheesh okay after 2 interview segments we get to Honor No More’s victory celebration segment. Just a lot of talking and inaction, so this just goes to feed that weird feeling I had coming into the show because of the timing. Eddie does the usual thing where hates on PCO and accuses him of being the weak link, which is a smart story angle since the fans tend to like PCO’s gimmick and this makes him more sympathetic to casual observers. 

Oh good Taven is talking nowWait did I just say that? DAMN YOU IMPACT! Made me like Matt Taven. Maria stirs the pot a little saying that Eddie is a better wrestler than Josh and Moose…by the implications. 

Thank God, Josh Alexander finally breaks up the segment with…more talking. Okay never mind. Jesus since the end of the Delirious match it was like 15 minutes before Josh finally charged the ring and threw down a bit with Honor No More. Rich Swann and Heath make a bit of the babyface save for Josh, but the numbers are still on Honor No More’s side. Oh MCMG come down in a tracksuit and dress clothes! Someone wasn’t ready to be doing a run in.

PCO & Vincent vs Rich Swann & Heath

Well isn’t that convenient that four of the men in the donnybrook were supposed to be in a match anyway.

Rich uses his quickness to try and stay ahead of PCO, but PCO cuts him off in the corner into the Corner Hung Codebreaker, then the leaned against the ropes Leg Drop thing. Vincent throws together a T-Bone Suplex into a Flatliner and keeps the vibes flowing on Rich Swann.

PCO clears out Heath, but PCO’s hand gets stuck in the ropes. Vincent eats a flip kick and the Phoenix Splash while PCO and Heath are brawling on the outside after the rope issue with PCO.

Pick Your Poison: Monster’s Ball Match: Masha Slamovich vs Allie Katch

Haymakers and Headbutts start things off as they both hit the ropes and lay out one another with dual clotheslines. Trash can lid duel, Masha gets first contact, but Allie blocks and returns 3 shots. German Suplex from Masha into whipping her with a chain, some choking and then general pulling with the chain in Katch’s mouth or around her eyes. Katch claws at Masha’s eyes to try and get some space.

Headbutts and Biting from Masha as Allie tries to power out of a Bow and Arrow. More chain choking…I’m not sure if this is a wrestling match or BDSM prep at the moment. Ahh Masha needs more Cowbell but Allie cuts her off with a trash can lid. Allie tries a Piledriver through a door, but Masha turns it into an Air Raid Crash into the opposite corner.

Commercial break, and Allie is getting choked again. Spots get a little redundant, slams, chokes, and blood. OHHH – it’s a “Use the Door” chant. I thought it was – nah – I won’t say what I thought it was. Chairshot from Masha misses, but a Snap Suplex from Masha onto the chair gets some usefulness. Straight Right to the gut and an Axe Kick allows Masha to hit the Death Valley Driver onto the propped up chair. Masha goes back to biting after it was only 2. Allie cuts off Masha going to the top, Superplex onto the trash can lid, into a Death Valley Driver through the door – but Masha kicks out.

Allie tries a Piledriver on the apron a few times, but Masha blocks. Masha tries for the Release German to the floor but Allie holds on. Dazed strikes, bites and then a Russian Leg Sweep through the table lays both out for a short time. Masha grabs a black bag, it’s gotta be tacks for Monster’s Ball. Masha eats a few tacks for good show, picks up Allie but Allie fights. Piledriver into the tacks from Allie, only 2. Allie opens a trash can, and empties a bunch of cut up soda cans. Hits Masha with the can, Masha fires, Spinning Heel Kick and then Russian Death Device into the pile of tacks and cans.

Overall Score: 6.25/10

The main event was pretty good, maybe even a little better than I gave it credit for; I’m just sick of seeing some crazy hardcore match so often from Impact. It feels like its weekly, and that’s too damn much. Trey is terrible, and that’s a hill I’m willing to die on. He sells poorly, he doesn’t tell a story with his wrestling and he looks like an idiot pretending to be something he isn’t; and that’s talented.

Myers is fine with his classic delusional heel style, Delirious gave a bit of a rub to Taurus so I’m guessing he’s probably next up in the X Division. But a straight 15 minutes of interviews and talking is just too damn much especially when the surrounding wrestling isn’t very good or hearty enough to help people tolerate talking time.

I do however love Joe Hendry. So…yeah. There’s always some quirky gimmicks that just resonate well with me, and this is gorgeous.

All in all, decent enough; though next week could be a real banger of a Go Home.


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