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Mitchell’s WWE Raw Results & Report! (5/23/22)

Becky Lynch shares her thoughts!

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WWE Raw 2022

The Man wants to be heard!

After losing her chance at the Raw Women’s Championship, Becky Lynch decides to speak on this newest setback. Is this the end of Big Time Becks?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Six Man Tag: Matt Riddle & The Street Profits VS Sami Zayn & The Usos; Riddle & The Profits win.
  • Mixed Tag: AJ Styles & Liv Morgan VS Damian Priest & Rhea Ripley w/ Edge; Priest & Ripley win.
  • Alexa Bliss VS Nikki A.S.H. w/ “Doudrop” Piper Niven; Bliss wins.
  • Cody Rhodes VS The Miz; Cody wins, by disqualification.
  • Ezekiel VS Chad Gable w/ Otis; Ezekiel wins.
  • Bobby Lashley’s All Mighty Challenge: Bobby Lashley VS MVP w/ Omos; MVP wins and chooses the stipulation for Hell in a Cell.
  • Becky Lynch VS Asuka; Becky wins and makes the Raw Women’s Championship match a Triple Threat.

PLAY BY PLAY

Matt Riddle heads to the ring!

The Bro is somehow scooting into the Ford Center despite taking an Uso Splash through the announce table last Friday. RKBRO no longer have the Raw Tag Team Champions, and Randy Orton isn’t here after taking his own brutal beatdown from the Bloodline, but Riddle still gets the mic. “I’m, uh, this is hard. I’m here with a heavy heart, man. Randy, he’s my best friend, he’s my mentor, he’s my dude, y’know? He’s my bro.” Fans chant for “R K BRO! R K BRO!” and Riddle gets a touch emotional. Riddle says that to be honest, the last couple of years have been hard for Randy.

The last couple months, even though RKBRO have had the time of their lives, Randy’s been having a hard time. Randy’s back has been bothering him. Last Friday, before the title match, Randy could barely walk. Riddle knew they had the match and that Randy wouldn’t let Riddle down because of how much that match meant to Riddle, and how much that match meant to the fans! RKBRO lost to the Usos, yes, but don’t get them wrong. The Usos are one hell of a team, tough as hell and they’ve done it all. Hats off to them. But for the Usos to win that way, with Roman, that backstabbing piece of garbage that calls himself a mountain, he’s a Tribal Piece of Trash!

Riddle assures us, he swears vengeance on Roman, on Jimmy, on Jey and anyone who is part of The Bloodline! By the end of Riddle’s career, he will have his revenge! Now, Riddle knows Randy has done more for him than he has for anyone else, and Riddle loves him and appreciates him for that. Randy is watching at home, Riddle wants him to know he loves Randy. Fans chant for Randy but Riddle says that honestly, who knows what the future holds for RKBRO. Who knows if RKBRO will ever be a thing again. But Riddle knows Randy is home watching, and the WWE Universe, you guys can help him with this. Get on your feet and make some noise to say with him, “R K BRO.”

Fans chant for “R K BRO!” again and Riddle says that’s for Randy! And after the break, The Stallion teams up with Montez Ford & Angelo Dawkins to start on that quest for revenge! Will Riddle & the Profits take down the Bloodline and “Rusty” Sami Zayn?

Six Man Tag: Matt Riddle & The Street Profits VS Sami Zayn & The Usos!

Raw returns and the Profits make their entrance. They’ve had their issues with RKBRO over the tag titles, but now they can all go after common enemies! First out, though, is the “elder statesman” of SmackDown, wearing his Bloodline merch shirt proudly. Then on the tron, Jimmy Usos asks, “Hey, Uce! How you think they gon’ feel when they introduce ya boys as the NEW WWE Undisputed Tag Team Champions?” Jey says, “I dunno, Uce, they might be cheerin’. They might be booin’. Little kids might be cryin’. We got grown men out there cryin’! They still might be hatin’ on the Usos!”

Why? Cuz they did like they said they were gonna? Might be the end of RKBRO! Or because they became the best damn tag team in the world! Because you the twos, and #WeTheOnes! And just as they said, the introduction is made and the fans are torn as Sami welcomes the Usos and jams out to their theme. But then Riddle rushes Jimmy at the ramp! Jey and Sami go after Riddle but the Profits back Riddle up! The ref hurries to tell these guys to get in the ring but the brawling  is all over the place! More refs rush out to separate these six but that’s easier said than done! Raw goes to break, will there still be chaos when we return?

Raw returns again and order has been restored. The teams sort out, and Sami starts with Dawkins. They feel things out, but Sami stays in a corner for defense. Sami holds up a finger because he supports “the ones.” Dawkins and Sami tie up, Sami gets around and headlocks. Dawkins endures, powers out and Sami rams him. Dawkins rebounds to run Sami over! Things speed up, Dawkins hurdles then whips Sami to dropkick him down! Dawkins runs at the corner to CYCLONE SPLASH! Tag to Ford, the Profits whip Sami to dropkick him down again! Ford kips up and he holds up a finger, then covers Sami. TWO, but Ford clamps onto an arm.

Ford wrenches, wristlocks, but Sami endures. Riddle wants in and fans rally up, so Ford obliges. Riddle tags in, to BLOAST the Bloodline! But Sami goes after Riddle and those bad ribs! Sami stomps away, hops on Riddle even, but lets off as the ref counts. Fans boo but Sami stomps Riddle more. Riddle goes to ropes, Sami stands on the bad ribs! The ref counts, Sami hops off, but fans rally up. Sami brings Riddle up to DECK him, then JAM a knee into the back. Sami wraps on a body scissors to squeeze those ribs! Riddle endures, Sami digs a forearm into Riddle’s head, and then thrashes to beat up those ribs.

Riddle elbows free but Sami stomps him down again! Tag to Jey and Riddle snarls as Jey holds up the finger. Riddle gets up to lift Jey! Riddle RAMS Jey into a corner and fires off KICK after KICK then stomp after stomp! The ref counts, Riddle lets off and drags Jey back up, FISHERMAN BUSTER! Cover, TWO! Riddle has Jey’s arm, he tags Ford in, and they mug Jey. Ford whips Jey, LARIATS him then mule kicks, haymakers and whips. Jimmy tags, Jey reverses, and Jimmy dumps Ford out! Jimmy RAMS Ford into steel steps, then SUPERKICKS him down! The Usos stand over Ford and fans boo while Raw goes to another break.

Raw returns and Sami rains down elbows into Ford’s shoulders. Sami clamps on a chinlock but fans rally up for Ford. Ford fights up, throws body shots, but Sami keeps him from the corner. Ford keeps fighting, but Sami throws him down by his head! Sami looms over Ford, brings him up and back suplexes, but Ford lands on his feet to hit a back suplex in return! Fans fire up and rally as the two men crawl for their corners. But Sami gets up to DECK Dawkins, then Jey trips Riddle from the outside! Fans boo and the ref reprimands but Jey gives Riddle a BARRIER BACK SUPLEX! Sami gets Ford up but Ford cradles, TWO!!

Sami CLOBBERS Ford! Tag to Jey, Jey brings Ford around and rains down fists. Jey raises the finger but fans boo. Jey brings Ford up, whips him at the corner, but Ford CLOBBERS Sami and Jimmy! Jey back suplexes, Ford lands on his feet and ENZIGURIS! Both men are down and fans fire up, especially with Riddle back on the corner! Sami calls to Jey, hot tags to Sami and Riddle! Riddle spins Sami around to PELE! Jimmy back suplexes, Riddle lands on his feet, ripcord and FINAL FLASH! Forearm smash for Sami, one for Jimmy, then back to Sami! Another for Jimmy, then a BROSPLODER!

Sami boots but Riddle blocks, to BROSPLODER! DOUBLE BROTON! Then another BROTON for Sami! Sami flops out, Jey gets in but Dawkins DECKS him! Jimmy gets in, Dawkins dodges to FLYING ELBOW! Ford gets in, builds speed, Dawkins gives him the boost, and Ford FLIES to take out the Usos! Riddle sees Sami, brings him in through ropes, and fans are thunderous! This one’s for Randy! DRAPING DDT! Riddle has the fans fired up as he hears those voices, bro! The Usos distract, Riddle runs them off, and the Usos really do leave! They’re leaving Sami high and dry! RKO for Sami!! Cover, Riddle & the Profits win!

Winners: The Street Profits & Matt Riddle, by pinfall

The Street BRO-fits just took down the rusty weasel that is Sami Zayn, but this isn’t enough to complete Riddle’s mission. Will Riddle, Ford & Dawkins look to turn things all around on the Bloodline in the near future?

 

Bobby Lashley heads to the ring!

After winning the Steel Cage match with Omos in a rather serendipitous way, Lashley is back to issue a challenge of his own! What will the All Mighty dare the Nigerian Giant and MVP to do? We find out, after the break.

Raw returns and Lashley has the mic. “Last week, I survived a Steel Cage match against a giant. And when the referee came down and raised my hand in victory, I turned and looked at that giant, and I saw the anger and I saw the defeat on his face, and I knew that we were far from over. Me and that giant have so much more to fight about. So I wasn’t surprised at all to learn that me and that Nigerian Giant will be doing it one more time… At Hell in a Cell!” However, tonight, Lashley has an All Mighty Challenge. And surely, MVP & Omos want to know what this is. So without further ado, let’s bring these two whatever you wanna call them out so they can hear about this challenge.

Omos & MVP make their way out, and MVP doesn’t know why Lashley thinks these two are a couple of dogs who come when he calls. Oh, it’s because Lashley thinks he’s the top gun. But MVP is the Maverick, and the whole world saw the Nigerian Giant beat Lashley’s ass all over that cage. And if not for some faulty equipment when Omos threw Lashley through the cage, we’d be having a completely different conversation. MVP has filed a formal protest, but Lashley tells him to shut his mouth! No one here wants to hear MVP! And why not they listen to his stipulation, since this is clearly not over.

MVP knows that just a regular match, regular stipulations, will not be enough to finish what this is. So Lashley’s challenge is he wants a match tonight. Tonight, the winner picks the stipulation for Lashley VS Omos at HIAC. MVP says Lashley must be on one. Lashley barely survived the last time Omos got his hands on him. There MVP goes running his mouth. HUSH, until they’re finished. Lashley has Omos at HIAC. But tonight is about the unfinished business with MVP. So Lashley’s challenge is easy: The All Mighty VS MVP tonight, and the winner picks the stipulations for Lashley VS Omos at HIAC!

Oh, MVP is standing there all confused, huh? Or is he afraid? MVP isn’t afraid! You think he can’t whoop Lashley!? He’s responsible for Lashley’s rise, so he’ll be responsible for the downfall! And after he beats Lashley’s ass, he’ll pick something not even the All Mighty can overcome! Oh, MVP made Lashley? When was the lsat time MVP won a match? If anyone made anyone, Lashley made MVP! And at HIAC, Lashley will tear Omos apart! But tonight, he’ll put MVP in the Hurt Lock in front of all these people! Well, it seems MVP has accepted the challenge as he and Omos head closer to the ring.

Lashley watches Omos, but MVP creeps up on the apron. But Lashley sees that coming and DECKS MVP! Omos and MVP regroup, and fans rally for “Bobby! Bobby!” MVP says that was stupid! MVP says will bring about Lashley’s downfall, but will it be the other way around?

 

Dana Brooke talks with Adam Pearce backstage.

She’s just saying, if Carmella is cleared to fight, Dana wants after her. He will take that into consideration. Dana goes to exit but Becky Lynch bumps into her. Uh, excuse you, Becky. Excuse you, Dana. Anyway, Becky wants to talk about what Asuka did. She couldn’t see for three days and there’s still some green in her hair after 11 washes! But the point is, if Pearce took his job seriously, he’d strike that loss from the record books. He’s not doing that. No, he can and should. And he should give her the title match. Um, seems after what they both did in that match- What did Becky do? She knows what she did.

And given that, the fair thing would be a rematch with Asuka. Well okay, that’s taking this job seriously. And if Becky wins, then she can have the title match at Hell in Cell. By being added to it in a Triple Threat. Oh… Becky still accepts that, because it’s better than nothing. But will the odds drastic go down for Bianca Belair should Becky get her revenge?

 

Mixed Tag: AJ Styles & Liv Morgan VS Damian Priest & Rhea Ripley w/ Edge!

The saying goes, “the enemy of my enemy is my friend.” That much is being proven true as the Phenomenal One and the LIVing End team up against the Judgement Day’s “Saints of Fate!” Will Styles & Liv make things Too Sweet tonight? Or will the Punisher and the Eradicator do exactly that to these resisters?

Raw returns and Judgement Day have the mics. Priest addresses the WWE Universe, “All rise.” Some fans stand but most don’t. “I said… All rise! RISE! RIIISE! And show the proper respect to the Judgement Day.” Fans stand but they boo, too. Priest says last week, Edge offered an opportunity to anyone intelligent enough to follow their mission and join up. One aspect of that mission is modesty. Rhea and Priest are very different from everyone else. You don’t see it, but Edge does. He showed them the way and set them free. If not, they’d be sheep like all of you fans. Sheep just stuck in the mud and trying to figure out what the “right thing” to do is.

Just like the rest of the roster! They wait for instructions and are told what to do. It’s what the fans do! And again, the truth hurts. But the one aspect, the one attribute, everyone is missing is courage. The courage to be who you are, accept it, and be proud of who you are! No one here has that courage. But they can help you! First, you must help yourselves. Rhea then tells Liv, “I know that you use your heart more than your head. But for the first time in your life, stop listening to the peasants on Twitter and the simpletons here in attendance. I might even forgive you for failing me in the past, if you just start thinking for yourself.”

Rhea tells Liv to save herself like Rhea did herself. Join the Judgement Day. Edge now says, “The Judgement Day is truth. A Truth that is right in front of most of your faces, but you’re just afraid to see it. The truth wills et you free. The Judgement Day is power! Clearly it is physical power, but more importantly, it is mental power.” And it is an opportunity to recreate yourself and rewrite your career, while sitting under Edge’s learning tree. Watch every ounce of sweat he puts in to be the best! Imagine Tom Brady or Wayne Gretzky or Michael Jordan offering this olive branch. Because Edge wasn’t handpicked to sit atop the mountain like John Cena!

Edge sits atop this mountain because he is a miracle of hard work and the success that followed. But that’s just the thing about all of you: you’re afraid. You’re just content to go to work, watch you boss sit in the corner office and make ten times your salary but with a sliver of your brain power, only because you sit on your lazy asses in a cubicle eating Cheetos! You’re all sheeple, afraid to grab life by the throat and wring it for all it’s worth! Judgement Day is not afraid to do that. They offer a mentality that will help you wake up and headbutt glass ceilings to bits! The same ceiling Edge annihilated decades ago!

Fans chant, “You Suck!” but Edge says no no, look in the mirror when you say that. So who will be their next member? Someone will be smart and savvy enough to understand the hand of the humble deity that is being extended. Will it be Tommaso Ciampa? Corey Graves? Alexa Bliss? Drew McIntyre? Oh, didn’t see that name coming, huh? Maybe Liv Morgan, Finn Balor, or AJ Styles. Surely by now, Styles has to understand being shoulder to shoulder with them is better than eye to eye. Make the right choice, Styles, and join them. By the end of all this, maybe Styles kids can call him, “Uncle Edge.” Edge says the choice is Styles’, so he should choose wisely.

Liv finally makes her entrance, and she doesn’t look like she’s joining Judgement Day. Styles follows, and they’re going to take the fight to Judgement Day, after the break!

Raw returns and Styles starts with Priest. They circle, tie up, and Priest knees low, CLUBS Styles, and wrenches an arm to a wristlock. Styles rolls, but Priest keep shim down with a knee. Priest drops a knee on Styles’ arm, wrenches it again, then headlocks. Styles throws body shots, powers out, but Priest runs him over! Cover, ONE, but Priest clamps onto the arm again. Fans rally for Styles as he endures again. Styles fights up, rolls, wrenches Priest back, but Priest swings. Styles gets under, waistlocks, but then ducks the back elbow. Styles headlocks, Priest powers out, but Styles holds ropes. Priest runs in but gets an elbow!

Styles storms up but Priest grabs him with both hands! Styles fights out, fires off his Phenomenal Blitz but Priest stops it at the lariat! Priest KICKS Styles, whips him to ropes, but Styles ducks and dropkicks! Rhea tags in, and she gets in Styles’ face! But Liv runs in, Styles gives her a boost to RANA Rhea! Rhea staggers up into a dropkick! Liv runs corner to corner to back body block! Liv keeps moving, she dodges Rhea to tilt-o-whirl and sunset flip! Rhea stays up, drags Liv up, then HEADBUTTS Liv down! Rhea then drags Liv up and TOSSES her to a corner! Rhea grins, then fires off hands in the corner!

Rhea TOSSES Liv corner to corner, then runs in, but into a BOOT! Liv goes up, leaps, but Rhea catches the crossbody! Rhea grins, pops Liv around for the stalling suplex, but Liv tries to cradle! Rhea blocks, powers Liv back up, but Liv slaps out to a BACKSTABBER! Rhea scrambles away and Priest helps her out of the ring. Liv just builds speed and DIVES! Priest ducks and Liv hits Rhea down! Priest sees what happened, then turns around into a SLIDING KNEE from Styles! Fans fire up with Styles and Liv as they Too Sweet in the ring! Edge tries to get his “saints” up but Liv goes out to fetch Rhea.

Liv gets Rhea up and in, stomps her down, then rains down fists! Rhea shoves Liv away, and EDDY GORDO KICKS Liv down! Rhea CLUBS Liv, hammers away on her, then hauls her up for another suplex. Rhea SLAMS Liv down, covers, TWO! Rhea is annoyed but she looms over Liv. Liv throws elbows but Rhea throws body shots. Liv kicks back from the corner, goes up, but Rhea ROCKS her with rights! Liv stays up to jump and FLYING RANA! Cover, TWO! Rhea kicks Liv from the mat but Liv KICKS Rhea! Tag to Styles, Priest rushes in and the hands start flying! Priest fires off haymakers and kicks, then whips Styles corner to corner

Priest runs in but Styles dodges! Styles runs in, BIG clotheslines in the corner! Priest flounders, bails out, but Styles keeps his eyes on Priest. Rhea barks at Styles but that distracts him so Priest can CLOBBER Styles! Styles falls out of the ring, Edge stays clear, and Priest hauls Styles up to SNAKE EYES him off the apron! Edge talks some trash while Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and both men are down! Fans rally up as they crawl, and Priest stops Styles from getting to Liv. Styles kicks but Priest ducks the enziguri, only for Styles to slide under! Styles leaps but Priest catches him, pushes him away and UPPERCKTS, but Styles KNEES Priest back! Priest rushes in but Styles dumps him out! Priest hurries up, grabs Styles by his hair, but Styles PELES! Hot tag to Liv! She dodges Rhea to fire off haymakers! Fans fire up and Liv kicks, KICKS and ENZIGURIS! Rhea staggers to a corner and Liv runs in, SHINING WIZARD! Liv rolls and runs back in, but Rhea dodges.

Rhea runs in but Liv elbows her away. Liv goes up to missile dropkick! Then she kips up, roars and runs to springboard CODE BREAKER! Cover, Edge helps Rhea get the ROPEBREAK! The ref didn’t see that but everyone else knows it, and Styles ATTACKS Edge! Priest goes after Styles but Styles fight shim off, too! The ref tries to get them to stop, Styles gets in and he clotheslines Priest back out! Liv aims at Rhea, runs in, but Edge helps Rhea again! Liv hits the mat, Rhea folds her up, Judgement Day wins!!

Winners: Damian Priest & Rhea Ripley, by pinfall

Edge gets in to taunt Liv after he screwed her out of winning, but Styles comes back with fists! Priest gets in to fire off hands but Styles hits back! Rhea anchors Styles and Edge DECKS him! Edge rains down fists, then snarls as he has Priest stand Styles up. Edge aims, runs in, SPEAR LEG SWEEP COMBO! Liv crawls to Styles, but Rhea BOOTS her down! And as Edge makes Styles watch, Rhea hits RIPTIDE! “Watch me, Liv! Watch me!” The Judgement Day stands tall over their enemies, but will this break Styles and Liv into joining them? Or will it only motivate them to try harder?

 

The Miz finishes warming up backstage.

Kevin Patrick asks him about his match with Cody Rhodes and the role the American Nightmare has been on. How does Miz plan on halting that progress? Miz says that much like Seth Freakin’ Rollins, Miz is sick and tired of Cody. In life, there is one thing Miz knows: never trust someone with a neck tattoo. And before Cody left WWE and came back at WrestleMania 38, Cody could never beat The Miz, could never steal his spotlight. But then how about now? Miz takes off his sunglasses to look at Kevin Patrick. Miz says Cody’s ego is out of control, and has more pyro than the Fourth of July. You don’t see Miz bragging about season three of Miz & Mrs., do you? NO!

Miz says he is the Kim Kardashian of the WWE! People want to know what he is doing, when he’s doing it and what he’s wearing while doing it. He doesn’t need a countdown, fans will wait all night just to see him! Miz will take Cody down a peg or two, and then no one can ignore him. Except Kevin Patrick. Go away. Kevin Patrick leaves, but will Miz leave having lost to the American Nightmare?

 

Jerry “The King” Lawler is here!

The WWE Hall of Famer is back on Raw, and for a very special edition of The King’s Court! But will it be Jerry’s last when his guest is Veer Mahaan? We find out, after the break.

Raw returns and Jerry welcomes us to the show. Tonight’s guest has had one of the most anticipated debuts in recent memory, and since that time, he has left his opponents literally shaking in their boots. So without further ado, it is a lion of a man, Veer Mahaan! Veer makes his entrance while a recap video shows us how Veer brutalized the Mysterios, then the Mysterios returned to get even! In the present, Jerry thanks Veer for joining him tonight. Some in the WWE say Veer is a man of few words, so Jerry wants to give Veer a chance to share with us the secret to his success. Veer looks Jerry in the eye, but chooses not to speak.

Well, Jerry won’t say “cat got your tongue,” but maybe that was a dumb question. But Jerry wants to understand why Veer has targeted the Mysterios. Veer snarls, but still says nothing. Well, maybe Jerry can salvage this. Could it be because what Dominik and Rey have said? Veer is so hairy, when he walks his dog, people pet Veer! Or maybe that he’s so hairy, Big Foot took a picture of Veer! Veer grabs the mic to say he is not here to joke around. Rey Mysterio is a legend. But he is too busy worrying about his little boy, Dominik! And that makes Rey weak. Veer took them both out! Jerry drops the mic but Veer helps pick it up. Is this fear Veer smells on Jerry?

Jerry sniffs himself. That’s just his cheap cologne. Veer snatches the mic away and says no more jokes! Instead of Veer explaining himself, how about he just shows us who he is?! Veer throws off his sash and corners Jerry! But here come the Mysterios! Rey & Dom storm the ring and brawl with Veer! Veer shoves Dom away, then hoists Rey up! Dom runs in but Veer BOOTS him! Veer throws Rey into the ring, then he puts Dom in with him. Veer snarls, but Rey RWECKS Veer with a dropkick! And then Dom adds on! Veer is still up, still mad, but Dom TRIANGLE JUMP DROPKICKS! Veer is back up again, so Rey WRECKS him with another dropkick!

Rey and Dom wait for Veer to try again, and even dare him to get in. Veer warns them both that he’ll get them, in time. Veer leaves, but

 

Backstage interview with Alexa Bliss.

Sarah asks how it feels to be back. Oh it’s great having fun and staying out of trouble. Speaking of that, how does Alexa feel about Sonya Deville’s recent actions? Rough couple of weeks, huh? Sonya gets fired as an official, Alexa beats her in her return match, then beats her again in the rematch. Then Sonya gets fined for hitting that ref. Maybe Sonya should look into therapy. Worked wonders for Alexa. But now Alexa now faces her former tag partner, Nikki A.S.H. They were once best friends, but parted ways. It was for the best, because Alexa is best friends with a doll, and Nikki dresses like a superhero.

Okay, that sounds weird when you say it out loud, but it is still great to be back. Alexa smiles and makes her entrance, but will she still be feeling great after her reunion in the ring with Nikki?

Alexa Bliss VS Nikki A.S.H. w/ “Doudrop” Piper Niven!

Raw returns and the Almost Super Hero makes her entrance. The bell rings and the two circle. Fans rally for Alexa as she and Nikki tie up. Nikki arm-drags, then strikes a pose. Piper tells her to stay focused, but then Nikki turns around into Alexa’s arm-drag! Alexa offers a handshake to her old friend, but fans aren’t sure> Nikki takes it, and she ROCKS Alexa with a sucker punch! Alexa dodges the haymaker to fire off shots of her own! Nikki bails out, Piper coaches her up and Alexa soaks up the cheers. Alexa grabs Nikki and drags her in, but Nikki trips Alexa! Nikki gives ground ‘n’ pound and Piper likes that!

Alexa kicks Nikki away but Nikki whips Alexa hard into a corner! Alexa bounces off buckles, Nikki covers, TWO! Nikki clamps onto Alexa with a cobra clutch and thrashes her around! Alexa endures, fights up, and fans rally. Alexa throws body shots, runs, but Nikki clamps on with another sleeper! But Alexa JAWBREAKERS free, then SHOTGUNS Nikki down, for a BLOCKBUSTER! Alexa drags Nikki up, but Nikki RAMS her into buckles! Nikki RAMS into Alexa more, then hoists her up top. Nikki ROCKS Alexa, climbs up after h, and strikes her pose. But Alexa throws body shots in return!

Alexa DECKS Nikki back to the mat! Alexa adjusts, but Nikki returns, into BOOTS! Nikki is down, Alexa stands up, TWISTED BLISS! Cover, Alexa wins!

Winner: Alexa Bliss, by pinfall

Now she gets her handshake. Alexa gets another win and leaves with Lily, will Alexa make her way back up towards the title?

 

Backstage interview with Seth Rollins.

Kevin Patrick asks Rollins about last week’s challenge to a Hell in a Cell match. How have the issues between him and Cody reached such a boiling point? Rollins says, “They used to sing my song. Every night, in every city, and now all I hear is ‘Cody! Cody! Cody!'” Rollins gets angrier with each time he says it, and says it makes him physically ill to hear that name. Cody this, Cody that, Cody here, Cody there. Did you know there is even a countdown clock for Cody? WHERE DOES IT STOP!? Where’s the countdown for Seth Freakin’ Rollins? He’ll tell you where: in Rollins’ head. And it’s ticking away second by second.

“But the question is, what happens when the clock strikes zero?” Rollins laughs at his own devious threat, but will the countdown be over when the cell door closes on him and Cody?

 

Backstage interview with Asuka.

Sarah asks her what it meant to beat Becky last week to get her title opportunity. Becky Lynch was not ready for Asuka, she was too busy crying~! Wah wah, Becky wants her title~! Not fair~! Asuka fakes crying, then laughs about how Becky cried to get another match tonight., Asuka says she’ll just beat Becky again and turn Becky into a Big Time BABY! Because on one is ready for Asuka!! Will the Empress of Tomorrow keep The Man down and out of Hell in a Cell?

 

Cody Rhodes VS The Miz!

Speaking of, the countdown for tonight is up! The American Nightmare is ready, his pyro goes off, and he even gives a young fan his weight belt. But will the Hollywood A-Lister make sure this is a sad scene for Cody? Or will it be another triumph as Cody heads for Hell in a Cell?

Raw returns and The Miz makes his entrance. The bell rings and the two circle. Fans rally up behind Cody and that annoys Miz. They tie up, Cody gets a leg but Miz stays up to facelock. Cody wrenches out, facelocks, but Miz puts Cody in the corner. The ref counts, Miz lets off but Cody dodges to COHP! Miz shoves back but Cody dodges to CHOP again. Miz headlocks, hits the takeover, and he taunts Cody as he grinds him down. Cody keeps his shoulders up, headscissors, but Miz kips free. Cody headlocks, hits the takeover, but Miz fights up. Miz powers out, things speed up, Cody hurdles and kicks low to drop for the Rhodes Uppercut!

Cody runs, but Miz CLOBBERS him! Miz uses a knuckle lock cover, ONE as Cody gets an arm up. Miz puts it down, TWO as Cody gets the other arm up. Miz moves around but Cody tuck shim for a sunset flip, TWO! Miz swings, misses, Cody dropkicks him down! Cody runs and DIVES into a forearm! Miz hurries up to the top rope and leaps, but into a body shot! Cody gets Miz with a facelock, then suplexes! Fans rally as Cody holds Miz up! GOURD BUSTER, and fans fire up more. Cody digs his knees into Miz’s back, ties up the legs, and then gets the BOW ‘N’ ARROW! Miz endures, slips free and covers, TWO!

Miz goes to a corner, mule kicks Cody, then goes up to jump and sunset flip! TWO, but Miz steps through! Cody kicks Miz away, then knees him low! Cody whips, knees again, then whips for another knee! Fans rally, Cody whips and hits a kitchen sink knee! RUNNING KNEE! Cover, TWO! Cody and Miz go to opposite corners, and Cody runs in, only to be stuck up top! Miz has Cody stuck on his flagpole, BOOTS him, then runs to BOOT him off the ropes! Cody tumbles to the floor and fans boo Miz as Raw goes to break.

Raw returns again and Miz runs corner to corner, but Cody moves! Miz crashes into buckles, fans rally up, but Miz hurries to whip Cody. Cody CLOBBERS Miz! Cody goes up and over in the corner, then hits the POWERSLAM! A kick and a Rhodes KICK, then the CODY CUTTER! Fans fire up, Cody gets Miz’s legs, “WOO~!” FIGURE FOUR LEGLOCK! Miz endures, Cody pushes up to put on the pressure, but Miz moves around to reach out for ropes! Miz can’t reach at first, but he gives a second effort and ROPEBREAK! Cody lets Miz go quickly, Miz bails out, but Cody goes up the corner?! But SETH ROLLINS shoves him down!!

Winner: Cody Rhodes, by disqualification

Deja vu, and Rollins CLOBBERS Cody on the floor! Rollins rains down fists, then stomps Cody before throwing off his jacket. Cody gets up to fire off the haymakers, but Miz CLOBBERS Cody! Cody throws hands on Miz! Rollins CHOP LBOCKS a leg, Miz stomps Cody down! Rollins joins in, they’re stomping away at the barriers! Rollins hauls Cody up, he and Miz both RAM Cody into steel steps! Cody goes tumbling over the other side! Cody clutches his leg, fans boo, and Rollins storms off. He snatches the weight belt from the kid Cody gave it to! Rollins brings it over to Cody, to LASH Cody on the back!

The ref tells Rollins to leave, and Rollins drops the belt to then storm back up the ramp. Cody manages to stand back up, and the fans rally as he gets the weight belt. Cody hobbles over and gives the belt back to the kid in the front row. Will Cody be able to show this same heroism when he and Rollins enter the cell? Or will the Visionary have far worse waiting for Cody in Hell?

 

Ezekiel VS Chad Gable w/ Otis!

Speaking of deja vu, didn’t we just see this? Well, “Master” Chad thinks he can beat Elias’ younger brother this time, but will the third time be the charm? Or will it be three strikes, you’re out for the “smartest man in the world?”

The bell rings, Kevin Owens sits at ringside, and Ezekiel ties up with Gable. Ezekiel TOSSES Gable to a corner, but Kevin shouts at ELIAS! Stop spreading lies! Gable asks Kevin to SHOOSH, and he ties up with Ezekiel. Ezekiel wrenches but Gable rolls, bridges, and handsprings to spin and headlock and spin to a drop toehold! “A THANK YEW!” Gable has the armlock, then a facelock, but Ezekiel RAMS Gable into a corner. The ref counts, Ezekiel lets off but CHOPS! Ezekiel copes “A Thank Yew!” then CHOPS again. Ezekiel whips, scoops, but Gable slips out to go after the arm. Ezekiel whips Gable away, Gable goes up and over, ducks and dodges, then goes up on Ezekiel!

Ezekiel tries to make this his Electric Chair attack but Gable slips off and shoves. Gable drops, but Ezekiel KICKS him away! Ezekiel runs, Otis trips him up! Fans boo but Gable CHOP BLOCKS Ezekiel down! Kevin applauds and Gable hits a DRAGON SCREW! Then another DRAGON SCREW! Gable YANKS the leg, then says, “A THANK YEW!” Kevin says “You’re welcome!” Gable gets the leg again, KNEE JAMMER! KNEE JAMMER! And then a spinning toehold! Ezekiel endures all this but Gable YANKS the leg again. “SHOOOSH!” Gable drags Ezekiel up, NORTHERN LIGHTS, and bridging cover, TWO!

Kevin says this is the truth being beat out of Elias! Gable goes up, MOONSAULT into boots! SPINEBUSTER! Fans rally, Ezekiel CHOPS Gable, throws body shots and another CHOP! Ezekiel whips, Gable reverses, Ezekiel goes up and mule kicks! Ezekiel gets his leg moving, runs and SPLASHES! But Gable distracts the ref so Otis can CLOBBER Ezekiel! But then the ref turns around and sees Otis is on the apron! Otis is EJECTED!! Fans fire up while the Alpha Academy freaks out! Otis leaves, now it’s all on Gable to win #ForTheAcademy! But Kevin slides in?! The ref sees him before he can do anything to Ezekiel! The ref EJECTS Kevin, too!!

Kevin freaks out but he also goes to the ramp! Ezekiel gets Gable in a victory roll, and WINS!

Winner: Ezekiel, by pinfall

Ezekiel runs away to the crowd as Kevin and Otis come rushing in! Ezekiel celebrates with the Ford Center, but Kevin demands the music stop! He’s had enough of this! Who cares if he’s Elias, Ezekiel, or Giuseppe! Kevin just wants to beat the hell out of him! Kevin VS Ezekiel, in Chicago, at Hell in a Cell! Ezekiel accepts that challenge, but will the Prizefighter finally get to the bottom of this?

 

Cody exits the doctor’s room.

Kevin Patrick asks him an update on his health after Rollins’ attack. An update, huh? Well his knee is banged up, but he can still put his weight on it. That’s fortunate for Cody, not so much for Rollins. Cody’s still breathing, still has his heart and lungs. He wasn’t just waxing poetic talking about second chances, that is for everyone! Everyone who was undesirable, has made themselves undeniable, and in Cody’s case, uncrowned. It is dawning on Rollins that he could go 0-3 against the American Nightmare. If Rollins wants to finish the job, Cody will be waiting.

 

Bobby Lashley’s All Mighty Challenge: Bobby Lashley VS MVP w/ Omos!

The Rocky Mountain Machine looks to finally get even with Montel Vontavius Porter directly over the betrayal, and use this win to decide how he finishes things with the Nigerian Giant! But will Omos be a big help to MVP and get the right to decide his own fate? Or will everyone see who really made Lashley the All Mighty?

Raw returns and MVP makes his entrance. MVP whispers something to Omos, perhaps already planning a strategy. MVP wants room to get in and Lashley gives him that room. The bell rings, MVP and Lashley circle, but then MVP bails out. MVP does stretches against the barriers, then gets back in the ring. Lashley and MVP circle again, but MVP uses ropes as defense. The ref has to keep Lashley back, and MVP slowly returns. MVP and Lashley square up, but then MVP bails right out. Fans boo MVP stalling, but Lashley goes out after MVP! MVP hurries in the ring, Lashley gets in but avoids the stomp!

MVP claims his leg hurts, and Omos CLOBBERS Lashley! Omos then dusts himself off and MVP is right back up! MVP gets Lashley up to put in the ring, and he runs in at the corner, HELLUVA KICK! MVP taunts Lashley, “I told you I can whoop you!” MVP slaps Lashley around while saying he made Lashley who he is! Lashley grabs MVP by the neck! MVP breaks free, fires haymakers, then runs, but Lashley follows, gets MVP in a clinch, COMPLETE SHOT! Fans fire up with Lashley and he waits on MVP to get up. Lashley runs in to clothesline MVP out! Lashley then goes out after MVP, hauls him up, and fireman’s carries! Lashley POSTS MVP!

Fans fire up and Lashley looms over MVP. The ring count climbs, but Lashley gets MVP up and in at 8 of 10. But Omos rushes in! Lashley dodges, and he fires off hands on Omos! The count finishes at 10 as Lashley clotheslines Oms into the timekeeper’s area! But then Lashley realizes what happened!

Winner: MVP, by count-out (can choose the stipulation for Lashley VS Omos at HIAC)

Lashley scowls at MVP, and says if it’s like that, then HURT LOCK!! MVP still ends up a ragdoll and Lashley throws him down! But now, Omos and MVP can name their game! Will Lashley end up suffering at the hands of the Nigerian Giant?

 

Bianca Belair heads to the ring!

The RawEST Women’s Champion is back again, because once again, she wants to watch what happens between Big Time Becks and the Empress of Tomorrow. Will history repeat itself from last week? Or will Becky get her comeback back on track?

Becky Lynch VS Asuka!

Raw returns and Asuka makes her entrance. Then Becky makes her entrance, and the match begins. They circle, Becky gets around and slaps Asuka in the head. Asuka gets mad but Becky shoves her. Asuka rushes in, Becky gest around but Asuka throws elbows, and a SLAP of her own! Things speed up, Asuka follows Becky and runs her over! Fans fire up, Asuka grabs at Becky but Becky KICKS Asuka away! Asuka rushes back in, Becky rolls Asuka but struggles to get the shoulders down. TWO, Becky blocks a kick to SLAP Asuka! And again! Becky talks trash, but Asuka tackles Becky to a corner!

Asuka RAMS into Becky over and over, then fires off body shots! The ref backs Asuka off, but Becky BOOTS back! Becky mule kicks but Asuka blocks to trip Becky up! Asuka stomps Becky to then get the DISARM-HER! Becky endures her own hold, crawls her away back, and gets the ROPEBREAK! Asuka lets off to BUZZSAW Becky out of the ring! Asuka then goes out to the apron, but Becky dodges the sliding kick! Becky gets up to shove and POST Asuka! Asuka tumbles down and Raw goes to break!

Raw returns again and Asuka is down on the outside again. Becky wants the ring out win, and the count is climbing. Asuka is still down at 5 of 10, but gets up at7! She’s in at 9, but Becky dropkicks her back out! Then Becky runs to WRECK Asuka with another dropkick! Becky goes out to TOSS Asuka into barriers, then gets back in the ring. The ring count starts again, Asuka is still down past 5 of 10 again. Asuka is back in at 9, but Becky rains down fists! Becky tosses Asuka out, then is on the apron, FLYING FOREARM! Becky RAMS Asuka into steel steps, drags Asuka up and into the ring, then goes up the corner!

Fans boo and Becky drops THE MAN’S LEG! Cover, TWO!! Becky rains down fists and is furious! Bianca is amused as Becky gets Asuka up. Becky whips but Asuka reverses and sends Becky out! Becky rushes back in, DOUBLE LARIATS take both women down! Fans rally up and even Bianca is getting into this as fans duel. Becky and Asuka are in opposite corners, Becky runs in but into an elbow! And then a BOOT! Asuka runs to LARIAT but Becky stays up! Becky kicks, Asuka blocks and slips around to GERMAN SUPLEX! Then HIP ATTACK in the corner! Becky denies the bulldog, but she walks into the SOBAT!

Asuka KICKS and BACK HANDS Becky, then SLIDING KICKS! Cover, TWO!! Becky survives and Bianca can’t help but smile. Becky wasn’t unbeaten for three years for no reason. Fans rally up more and Asuka runs at Becky in the corner, only to be sent into buckles! Roll up, with feet on the ropes! TWO!! Asuka survives but Becky goes up, but leaps into a CODE BREAKER! Cover, TWO!! But into the ARMBAR!! Becky endures, rolls, and gets the ROPEBREAK! Asuka hurries to get Becky up but Becky HOTSHOTS her! Becky goes up top, but Asuka ROCKS her first! Asuka then climbs up to go after Becky, SUPERPLEX! Asuka crawls to the cover, TWO!!

Becky survives and Bianca is smiling but also a bit surprised. Fans rally, Asuka gets back up, and she runs in at Becky, but the hip attack misses! Becky gest a DISARMER IN THE ROPES! The ref counts, Becky stops at 4 to have Asuka in the ropes. But Asuka ROCKS Becky, and hits a DRAPING DRAGON SCREW! Then the HIP ATTACK! Becky is sent tumbling to commentary! Asuka goes to the apron, SLIDING KICK! Asuka gets Becky up, chicken wings, but Becky slips out! Into a POP-UP KNEE! Becky ends up sitting on Bianca, Asuka ROUNDHOUSES but hits Bianca!! Becky throws Asuka down, the ring count is 7 of 10!

Asuka slides in at 9.99, but into a body scissors clutch! BECKY WINS!!!

Winner: Becky Lynch, by pinfall (joins the HIAC Raw Women’s Championship match)

Bianca is out cold! That’s the only reason she isn’t as shocked as Asuka or the fans! The Man is almost in tears as she says justice has been served, and now she’ll get her title back! Will Big Time Becks use the Triple Threat to beat Empress and EST and once again be the champion?


My Thoughts:

A very good Raw, but it sure felt like it was heavily recycled. The main event was really just the other way last week’s match could’ve gone, and now we have the Triple Threat that was obviously coming three weeks back. It was still a really good match, and a really clever way to get to Becky winning, and now that Triple Threat for the title is going to be great stuff. I can’t really be sure who gets the win but it’ll easily allow for further feuding between Bianca and Becky, Bianca and Asuka, or Becky and Asuka. Another recycled match was Ezekiel VS Gable, and with no warning. Ezekiel was of course winning, and now Kevin VS Ezekiel is set, probably as a kickoff match or something.

The opening was great stuff. Riddle was definitely emotional over Randy having to take this time off, that bad back has to be legit or else it might’ve been Orton stepping up to call Roman out. Street BRO-fits getting the win over Sami & Usos was the logical move, as now the Profits can move up to challenge the Usos for the undisputed tag titles. Riddle can go after Roman at some point, and assuming he fails, it can be Orton or McIntyre next. Still kinda hoping it was to be Nakamura but there’s still the Intercontinental Championship where he, Sami and even Gunther can feud over it for the summer.

I really thought Lashley’s All Mighty Challenge was going to be about having a Hell in a Cell match at Hell in a Cell, but they kinda gave away the rematch with graphics. Instead, it seems they’ll be doing something No Disqualification related that isn’t the cell. Because otherwise, they should’ve just made Lashley say it was a HIAC match. Maybe it’ll be a Last Man Standing match so that they’ll both have to go the extra mile to keep the other down. Alexa VS Nikki was good, but could’ve been so much more if they didn’t book it right before it was time for Cody. Maybe they’ll try again later, there is so much more to that story right there that deserves to be used.

And speaking of Cody and his countdown, I do like that superstars are starting to bring it up and be confused and upset by it. Miz used it in his promo, Rollins used it in his promo, this could be one of the ways WWE plays the “Is Cody really a Face?” story the way AEW was with him and the TNT Championship. Cody VS Miz was a very good match but of course Rollins attacks. Rollins taking the weight belt from the kid was great Heel stuff, and of course Cody gives the belt back. Good Face points both in kayfabe and in reality, and that Hell in a Cell match is going to be really good stuff.

Jerry Lawler returning for a King’s Court was a nice surprise, but it was a rather awkward segment. Though, that might be on purpose. Jerry made juvenile jokes, Veer got mad, Mysterios return and the Mysterios stand tall. We’re surely getting the Veer VS Rey match we should’ve gotten at Backlash, they just have to announce it officially. A little surprised we didn’t get Theory in any capacity, but I suppose that’s fine. There was a lot going on even without him, but I just hope he and Mustafa Ali set up for the US Championship at some point, it’s just obvious.

Judgement Day had a rather long promo segment but at least they were saying things that fit the group better. Edge name dropped quite a few good names for their faction, such as Ciampa, Corey and Alexa. The Mixed Tag was a good match, though I thought they were going to save that for the Six Person Tag. At the same time, no Finn showing up, not sure if something happened where Finn couldn’t be here and they had to change course or if this is supposed to be teasing Finn turning to join Judgement Day. I hope we still get the Six Person Tag first, and then it really should be Ciampa joining Judgement Day since Ciampa has been floating around stories since his call-up.

My Score: 8.3/10


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Coverage

Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (5/10/24)

This tournament is phenomenal!

Published

on

SmackDown’s brackets are set!

The King & Queen of the Ring tournaments began on Monday Night Raw, and they continue here on SmackDown! But will AJ Styles use the crown to redeem himself from Backlash? Or will there soon be a King Viper?

OFFICIAL RESULTS

  • Queen of the Ring: Naomi VS Nia Jax; Nia wins and advances.
  • King of the Ring: Carmelo Hayes VS Baron Corbin; Melo wins and advances.
  • Queen of the Ring: Jade Cargill VS Piper Niven; Jade wins and advances.
  • Queen of the Ring: Bianca Belair VS Candice LeRae; Bianca wins and advances.
  • King of the Ring: Tama Tonga VS Angelo Dawkins; Tama wins and advances.
  • King of the Ring: Randy Orton VS AJ Styles; Orton wins and advances.

PLAY BY PLAY

Nick Aldis is in the ring.

“Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to SmackDown live from a sold out Mohegan Sun Arena in Wilks-Barre, Pennsylvania!” The fans fire up for that! Aldis continues to say there are huge King & Queen of the Ring matches here tonight, but before that, please welcome the Undisputed WWE Champion, the American Nightmare, Cody Rhodes! The fans fire up and sing along with the song, “WHOA~ OH~!” Cody gets his pyro then gets the fans even more fired up before going down the ramp and to the ring. Cody shakes hands with Aldis, gets himself a mic, and hears the fans chant his name.

Aldis tells Cody congratulations on the successful defense against AJ Styles at Backlash. Never a small feat getting your hand raised against the best of a generation. But now, we turn our attention to the KQOTR event in Saudi Arabia. And Aldis knows Cody well, has heard him say it, and knows it already: Cody is a fighting champion. Cody wants to defend against the very best as often as he can. That said, Aldis brought Cody out here tonight to let him know his next challenger has already been determined. And Aldis thought there was no better time to introduce him than right here and now.

We all turn to the ramp to see… LOGAN PAUL!? The Mohegan Sun Arena rains down boos on The Maverick United States Champion as he makes his way out here. Logan shakes Aldis’ hand, then steps into the ring with Cody. United States Champion circles with Undisputed Champion before getting himself a mic. The fans continue to boo Logan but Logan doesn’t let that bother him. Cody speaks first, “So… Logan Paul.” Logan wants to hear that again. “So… Logan Paul…” The fans boo harder each time, and Cody says he already knows what Logan wants to talk about.

Logan says yes he does, brother! Main eventing the KQOTR PLE, Champion VS Champion with THE Cody Rhodes. It will truly kick off the Logan Paul Levesque Era! The fans boo and chant “LOGAN SUCKS! LOGAN SUCKS!” Cody tells Logan that Champion VS Champion is a challenge he certainly likes. Because the fact is, holding not one but two- Oh, see, that’s the thing, Cody. Facts don’t care about feelings, and neither does Logan. And here’s some facts: Logan Paul, not Cody, is the longest reigning champion in the WWE. He is the greatest attraction in this company. He had the greatest rookie year of all time. And Logan is a superstar.

Logan saw that there’s a fan with a birthday today. Congrats, Isaiah, you met a superstar, and his name is Logan Paul. Happy Birthday! But hey, Cody’s great! He’s a superstar, too! Yeah, Cody won the 2023 Royal Rumble. But what does everyone remember from that night? Logan Paul’s viral midair collision with Ricochet, The Crash Seen ‘Round the World! And yes, Cody won at WrestleMania 40, but what was everyone talking about that night? Logan, IShowSpeed, and Prime. Logan’s brand, Logan’s ideas, Logan’s moment. And look who’s taking all the credit. See, three years ago, another fact: Cody and Logan both debuted at Mania.

The fans chant “PRIME SUCKS! PRIME SUCKS!” and that annoys Logan. Logan says Prime has 20 calories and two grams of sugar, so shut up, Pennsylvania! The fans boo more but Logan has more facts for the “virgin inbreds.” These two men came to WWE on the same night. And since then, Logan’s been the fuel for the rocket ship that is the WWE. So his question for Cody is: how can Cody #FinishTheStory when it isn’t even his story? So what’s Logan gonna talk about? Him knocking Cody out on top of his logo, walking out as THE WWE Champion! The fans still chant “LOGAN SUCKS!” but Cody takes a moment.

Cody bets a lot of people standing across from Logan just assume, “What a dumbass.” The fans cheer that! As fun as that would be, he won’t call Logan a podcaster, YouTuber, outsider, influencer, any of that. It isn’t just a fad for Logan, Cody’s gotten a sense for who Logan really is, and so have the fans. Logan went toe-to-toe with Floyd Mayweather. Made Forbes’ 40 Under 40. And Logan won the United States Championship. But since we’re all going over facts, the fact is, if Cody were to win that US Championship, that’d make him a Grand Slam Champion! The fans like the sound of that!

Logan lifts his mic but Cody stops him! Cody says he is not done. In addition to all the positives that Logan is, Logan is also disrespectful, self-centered, delusional, and cannot go a single match without using brass knucks! And Logan is out here taking credit for something that doesn’t belong to him, or to Cody. This right here is a team! And at the KQOTR event, Logan will find out where he stands on that team. Cody lifts his title high, but so does Logan. Who will be the one man that holds them both at the end of this?

 

Backstage interview with AJ Styles.

Kayla Braxton is with the Phenomenal One and brings up his first round match with The Viper, Randy Orton. How prepared is he feeling? Before that, Styles wants to talk Backlash. How Styles had Cody on the ropes, had him beat, and Cody knows it. Lyon, France knows it. That’s why they were doing the chants and the singalongs, all to distract Styles. Mission accomplished. It should be Styles facing Logan and defending that title. But just know this: Cody, the next time you and Styles meet, Styles WILL beat you. And Styles will earn another title match, and that starts tonight. Winning King of the Ring is a Phenomenal Step in the right direction.

Styles heads out, he didn’t even mention Randy by name. But will that only earn him an RKO outta nowhere and right outta the tournament?

 

Queen of the Ring: Naomi VS Nia Jax!

Speaking of falling short for a title, The Glow felt some of that at Backlash in that Triple Threat. But likewise, The Irresistible Force has been just out of reach of a title herself. Who will step over the other to step closer to the throne?

SmackDown returns and Nia makes her entrance. The bell rings and the two stare down. The fans rally up, Nia pie faces Naomi, so Naomi SLAPS back! Naomi fires forearms, Nia shoves her away then CLOBBERS her! Nia dribbles Naomi off the mat, then she drags Naomi up to whip to a corner. Naomi hits buckles hard, Nia soaks up heat, and Nia runs up to SPLASH! Nia TOSSES Naomi away, then soaks up more heat. Nia runs in again to SPLASH, and then she shoves Naomi down. Nia runs to drop an elbow! The fans rally for Naomi but Nia kicks her around. Nia stands Naomi up, puts her in another corner, then runs in again, but Naomi dodges!

Nia is caught in ropes, Naomi KICKS the leg, a QR code pops in, and then Naomi CHOP BLOCKS Nia! Naomi headlocks to BUCKLE BULLDOG! Nia staggers away, comes back, but Naomi dodges to POST her! Naomi sees Nia tumble out, then she builds speed! Naomi DIVES and sends Nia into barriers! Naomi then fires hands, but Nia shoves her into the apron! Nia fireman’s carries, SAMOAN DROP to the floor! The fans boo while Naomi is down, and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again and Nia grinds Naomi with a cobra clutch! Naomi fights up and JAWBREAKERS free! Naomi KNEES Nia, ROCKS her, then ROCKS her again! But Nia HEADBUTTS Naomi down! The fans boo but Nia motions wearing a crown. Nia brings Naomi up, hangs her out to dry, then HEADBUTTS her down again! Naomi tumbles to the floor, but Nia soaks up the heat. Nia wants the ring count and it begins. Nia counts along with a lot of sass, but Naomi sits up at 4 of 10. Nia tells the fans to kiss this while we pass 5, but Naomi is on the apron. Nia storms over, Naomi HOTSHOTS her!

Naomi slingshots up and over, but Nia stays up! Only for Naomi to avoid the hip drop! The fans fire up while both women are down! Naomi rises again, the fans rally up, and Naomi fires forearms! Naomi whips, Nia blocks! Nia whips, but Naomi slides under! Naomi LARIATS but Nia stays up! Naomi runs to UPPERCUT but still Nia stays up! Naomi springboards, FLYING CHUCK! Nia drops to her knees and the fans fire up! Naomi feeds off that energy and springboards again, but Nia catches her! But Naomi slips out to the apron, ROUNDHOUSE, and then she reels Nia in through the ropes! HEATSEEKER!

Naomi hurries up to the corner, SPLIT-LEG MOONSAULT! Cover, TWO! Nia survives and Naomi is frustrated. The fans rally up as Naomi and Nia rise, and Naomi headlocks again. Nia shoves her to a corner, but then Naomi dodges the splash! Naomi forearms Nia, then hoists her up the corner! The fans fire up this feat of strength! Naomi goes up after Nia, but Nia HEADBUTTS! And HEADBUTTS! And then clinches, brings Naomi up, and SUPER- STEINER!! Naomi turns things around and hurries to cover, TWO!! Nia survives and the fans are thunderous! Naomi and Nia both catch their breath, and Naomi rises first.

The fans rally, Naomi waits on Nia, then SUPERKICKS! Nia wobbles, into another SUPERKICK! Naomi runs up, but buzzsaw becomes POWERBOMB! Nia flips Naomi over to run and LEG DROP! Nia then puts Naomi in a drop zone, steps on her to go up the corner, A-NIA-LATOR!! Cover, Nia wins!

Winner: Nia Jax, by pinfall (advances to the next round)

Naomi’s Queen of the Ring hopes were just literally crushed! Nia says she will be queen, will no one be able to stop her?

 

Baron Corbin shows off his shave.

Of his head, that is. Byron Saxton steps over to interview The Lone Wolf, welcoming him back to the blue brand. How has Corbin changed things up since he was last on SmackDown? Corbin says so much has changed. Things weren’t going his way back then. He was lost and confused. Was he a king? A constable? Happy or sad? He went back to NXT, found himself again, and is going to wreck shop as himself. IT will be a grind, but… Then in steps Carmelo Hayes! Melo sarcastically congratulates Corbin on getting called up. When did he get Drafted? Melo must’ve missed it. Oh, Melo’s got jokes, huh? Well, with a head that big, it’ll be an easy target.

Corbin says here’s some advice, but Melo tells him to save it. The last guy that tried that isn’t even in the tournament anymore, all at the thought of Melo running circles around him. So here’s some advice for Corbin: do what Bobby did, and pull out now. Because tonight, Melo is running circles around Corbin. Corbin can’t believe Melo’s attitude. Will Corbin find a way to humble… HIM?

 

King of the Ring: Carmelo Hayes VS Baron Corbin!

The former NXT Champion took his shot at Cody Rhodes, and yeah, he missed. But now he’s taking aim at the throne, and taking on a former King of the Ring to start off! Will Melo hit the game winner and move on to the next round? Or will the Lone Wolf take a big bite out of… HIM?

The bell rings and the two circle. Melo avoids Corbin, circles with him again, then jukes again! Melo waistlocks, Corbin bucks the O’Conner, but Melo ducks ‘n’ dodges the big shots to dropkick the legs out! Melo then Eddy Gordo Kicks! And he SLAPS Corbin’s bald head! Melo talks trash, but Corbin DECKS him! Corbin DECKS Melo again, puts him on ropes and body shots! Corbin follows Melo to a corner, then reels him in for an ELBOW! Corbin ELBOWS Melo again, hauls him up to back suplex, but Melo lands out! Only for Corbin to FISHERMAN BUSTER! Cover, TWO! Corbin has control while Melo bails out, and SmackDown goes to break!

SmackDown returns and Corbin throws down ELBOWS on Melo in a corner! Fans count all the way to TEN, but then Melo fights the superplex! Melo slips out the bottom, YANKS Corbin down, then springboards for the FLYING LARIAT! Melo runs up and tilt-o-whirls, LA MYSTICA! Cover, TWO! Corbin is still in this but Melo dares him to get up. Melo aims from the corner, runs up, but into a fireman’s carry! Melo fights with elbows, slips free, and shoves Corbin away. Corbin swings, Melo dodges, but runs into DEEP- NO, Melo slips fere of that one! Only to run back into the fireman’s carry! DEATH VALLEY DRIVER!

Corbin isn’t done, he suplexes for the SHEER DROP BRAINBUSTER! Cover, TWO!! Corbin maybe got a little lax in the pin, but the fans are all fired up! Corbin storms over to Melo in a corner, then puts him back up top. The fans rally for Corbin as he throws hands. Melo kicks Corbin away, to hit the FIRST 48! Melo then resets, runs up, V-TRIGGER! Melo goes up top, Corbin rises, NOTHING BUT- NO! Corbin avoids the three pointer to then clinch and CORNER URENAGE! Then a LARIAT! Corbin hauls Melo right up, suplexes, ANARCHY CUTTER! Cover, TWO!! Melo survives but Corbin reels him right in! Only for Melo to slip free again! Cradle, MELO WINS!!

Winner: Carmelo Hayes, by pinfall (advances to the next round)

Corbin was about to dunk on Melo, but Melo steals the ball to score instead! And if Melo can do that to a former King of the Ring, is it inevitable that WWE will crown… HIM?

 

Backstage interview with Bayley.

Kayla is now with the WWE Women’s Champion and says tonight is SmackDown’s start in the Queen of the Ring Tournament. Does The Role Model have a particular favorite to win? Bayley says there is a lot of talent in this tournament, but she is interested to see how far Jade Cargill can go. Before Bayley can say more, Chelsea Green & Piper Niven walk over. The Hot Mess says, “Ooh la la~! Clearly, the stench of France has made you lose your mind, because you forgot about Miss Piper here. But we have to go, Piper’s about to kick Jade out of the first round of the tournament. Au revoir!”

Chelsea blows mocking kisses, Piper eyes Bayley up and down, then they both leave. Will the Scottish Viper, a former WWE Women’s Tag Team Champion, be able to weather the storm that the current WWE Women’s Tag Team Champion is bringing?

 

Backstage interview with Randy Orton.

Byron is now with The Viper, and says many are looking at Orton as the favorite to win the KOTR. However, some are also saying the same about his opponent in this opening round, AJ Styles. What’re Orton’s thoughts? Orton says that there is a lot he has accomplished in his tenure in the WWE. But one thing he hasn’t done is become King of the Ring. Now, he like everyone else, all the guys in the back, all the fans out there, know how great AJ Styles truly is. But, man oh man, it feels phenomenal when he hits Styles with an RKO. So stay tuned. Orton then thinks of one more thing. He’s reminded of something. This is for Tama Tonga.

Last week, Tama took out Orton’s friend and teammate, Kevin Owens, at Backlash! The Bloodline took Kevin out! And has Orton forgotten about that? Oh no he has not! Orton sees the bracket, that Tama is safe on the other side of SmackDown’s bracket, but something tells him that they will path cross. And when they do, it won’t just be an RKO for Tama. No, no, no. Orton will do everything in his power to make sure Tama sees it coming! The Good Bad Guy has been warned, but will Orton get through Styles to make good on it?

 

Queen of the Ring: Jade Cargill VS Piper Niven w/ Chelsea Green!

The storm that hit the WWE Women’s Division brought about NEW WWE Women’s Tag Team Champions at Backlash, but now, forces of nature are colliding here in the opening round of the tournament! Who will still be standing at the end of this to head for the throne?

The bell rings and the fans rally up as the two circle. They tie up, are in a deadlock, and break. They circle again, tie up, and are in another deadlock. They break again, talk some smack, and the fans fire up. Jade runs, RAMS Piper, but Piper stays up. Piper smiles but Jade dares her to try. Piper runs, RAMS Jade, and the fans fire up again! Jade and Piper talk some more smack, Jade runs, but ducks the lariat to run Piper over! Piper gets up, Jade whips, but PIper reverses and ELBOWS Jade! Jade stays up so Piper reels her in to scopo! Jade slips free, and SUPERKICKS! Jade roars, runs in at Piper, but PIper catches her to SPINEBUSTER!

Piper scowls, and SENTONS! Cover, TWO! Jade withstands that damage but Chelsea coaches Piper up. Piper kicks Jade around, stomps her, then hauls her up. Piper SLAPS Jade right down, then stalks her to ropes. Piper CHOKES Jade, Chelsea laughs at her, but the ref counts. Piper lets off, so Chelsea SLAPS Jade! The fans boo but Piper hauls Jade up. Piper scoops and SLAMS Jade, then dusts herself off. Chelsea taunts the fans for cheering Jade, but Piper hauls Jade up again. Short arm LARIAT! Jade falls over, but Piper drags her back up. Short arm LARIAT! Jade falls again, Piper flexes, but the fans boo.

Piper stands Jade back up, but Jade blocks the lariat! The fans fire up as Jade fires forearms, but Piper HEADBUTTS! Both women wobble, Piper runs, but Jade gets around to BLUE THUNDER BOMB! Cover, TWO!! Piper survives and Chelsea is panicked! Jade scowls, the fans rally up, and Jade runs in at the corner. SPLASH! Jade keeps going, to SPLASH again! Jade wants a third but Chelsea stands in the way! So Jade DECKS her! The fans are thunderous, but then Piper swings on Jade! Jade gets around, chicken wings, but Piper powers out to HEADBUTT! Piper runs in at Jade to SPLASH in return!

Piper sits Jade down, goes corner to corner herself, CANNONBALL! Cover, TWO! Jade survives that hit, too, and Piper isn’t sure what to do now! Chelsea stands back up, she tells Piper to finish this! Piper puts Jade in a drop zone, goes up and up, but Jade gets up to YANK her down! Piper staggers, into a BOOT! Jade hurries to chicken wing! JADED!! Cover, Jade wins!

Winner: Jade Cargill, by pinfall (advances to the next round)

Chelsea is losing her mind over Piper losing in the first round, but now Jade steps forward… to take on the Irresistible Force! Talk about forces of nature! Will Jade bring that storm right to Nia’s front door and then head for the throne?

But then here comes Jade’s teammate! The EST is also in this tournament, will the strongEST duo dominate? Or will the Poison Pixie make her way to the throne?

 

Shinsuke Nakamura speaks.

“My art is not just to compete. It is to conquer, to captivate. And to destroy ALL who dare stand against me in the ring. Because I am here to claim what is rightfully mine: The pinnacle of SmackDown. And now that I am here, no one is safe. The Master of Strong Style does not just plan to rise, I plan to reign supreme. So watch closely, because everything on SmackDown is about to change. And it will never be the same again.” Is that a not so subtle hint that Nakamura is looking to write a sequel with The American Nightmare?

 

Queen of the Ring: Bianca Belair VS Candice LeRae w/ Indi Hartwell!

SmackDown returns as Candice makes her entrance, Indi Hartwell with her. The bell rings and the two circle. The fans rally, but Indi already takes as swipe! Bianca avoids being tripped up, and she still runs Candice over! The fans fire up as Bianca runs, then handsprings over Candice’s dropdown! Bianca eggs Candice on, bypasses her, but Candice BOOTS back! Only to swing into chicken wings! Candice victory rolls free to send Bianca out! Candice goes to the apron, FLYING- NO, Bianca stops the rana to SWING Candice into barriers! Indi is stunned but Bianca puts Candice in the ring. Candice distracts the ref, Indi CHOP BLCOKS Bianca!

Candice drags Bianca up but Bianca stops the cradle! Bianca suplexes Candice up to hold, then SLAM! The fans fire up and Bianca RAMS into Candice at the corner! Bianca goes up, rains down fists, and the fans count along, only for Candice to slip out at 7! Candice grab a leg but Bianca kicks her away! Bianca then backflips up and over, only for the leg to jam! Candice dropkicks that leg out, then BUZZSAWS! Cover, TWO! Bianca is still the toughEST, but clearly Indi’s influence is being felt. Candice HAMMERS away on that leg, then SMASHES the knee! Indi smiles and nods while Candice stalks Bianca.

Candice grabs the legs, but Bianca kicks. Candice CLUBS the leg, Bianca still kicks, and Bianca kicks free! Candice runs up, but into a scoop! FALL AWAY SLAM! The fans fire up again and Bianca stands. Bianca gets Candice up, suplexes again, but Candice slips free! CHOP BLOCK! Candice uses Bianca as a step for the SENTON! Candice goes to ropes, but Bianca brings her off the ropes! Torture rack, KISS OF DEATH! Cover, Bianca wins!

Winner: Bianca Belair, by pinfall (advances to the next round)

It was basically a Handicap Match, but Bianca still wins out! Bianca will have to wait for Mia Yim and Tiffany Stratton to fight it out on this weekend’s “Supershow,” but will she be ready for whoever comes her way?

 

The Bloodline is backstage.

Tama Tonga fires himself up for his match tonight, with Tonga Loa and Solo Sikoa both stoically standing by. Paul Heyman walks in, they all look at him. The Wise Man just wants a moment alone with Solo, so Solo excuses The Guerillas. Fans can be heard chanting “WE WANT ROMAN!” while Heyman says he knows his place in life. Heyman is Roman’s Wise Man. But Solo, you are making decisions- Oh, so Heyman decided to lie about pulling Roman from the WWE Draft? Yeah, that one backfired on them all. Because of that mistake, The Bloodline was drafted late in the third, when they should’ve been number one overall.

Solo says it’s like Heyman is trying to take money out of Solo’s pocket. Is Heyman trying to do that? No, not at all! IS he trying to take food from his kids? He wants Solo’s kids to starve? No! Then what about last week? Heyman walked past Jey, did he try to give some kind of signal? Some kind of look that he needed help? No…! Solo understands Heyman is the Wise Man, just trying to protect Roman and The Bloodline. But he hasn’t spoken to Roman since he lost their title at WrestleMania, right? R-Right. Well, Solo has. What?! And Solo says until Roman comes back, Solo is in charge, he calls the shots. That makes Heyman Solo’s Wise Man, “by orders of the Tribal Chief.”

Solo asks for a hug. Heyman brings it in, and Solo says he loves Heyman. Solo glances at The Guerillas, is this the new hierarchy here in The Bloodline?

 

Andrade speaks.

“I am a third-generation luchador. My destiny is here in the WWE. The Era of Andrade El Idolo has begun.”

 

King of the Ring: Tama Tonga w/ The Bloodline VS Angelo Dawkins w/ The Pride!

The Good Bad Guy was more than ready to fight The All Mighty, but an unfortunate injury during training has changed things. But The Curse of Greatness is ready to be that next man up! Will Dawkins look to go from a Profit to a king? Or will nothing stop The Bloodline from taking another throne for their own?

SmackDown returns as The MFT makes his entrance, The Bloodline backing him. The bell rings and Tama fires off hands! The ref counts as Tama stomps a mudhole, but lets off at 4. Tama then comes back to SPLASH! Dawkins staggers around, Solo applauds, and Tama fires haymakers and knees! Tama keeps on Dawkins in another corner, fires body shots, but the ref counts. Tama lets off at 4, the ref reprimands, but Solo smiles. Tama goes corner to corner, but Dawkins avoids the splash! Dawkins JABS, JABS, JABS, then LARIATS! And LARIATS again! Dawkins whips, Tama reverses but Dawkins hurdles! And UPPERCUTS!

The fans fire up with Dawkins, he runs corner to corner, CYCLONE SPLASH! Then ENZIGIRI! Dawkins keeps moving, blows past Tama, then POUNCES! Tama flops out of the ring and the fans fire up again! But then Solo stands in the way! So Dawkins DECKS him! The fans fire up and Ford FLIES onto Solo & Loa! The fans are thunderous, but Tama returns! Only to run into a SKY HIGH!! Cover, TWO!! Tama survives and Dawkins is stunned! Loa gets up to POST Ford! Loa & Solo drag Ford up, SAMOAN SPIKE!! Dawkins is worried for Ford , but Tama uses that to COMPLETE SHOT!! Cover, Tama wins!

Winner: Tama Tonga, by pinfall (advances to the next round)

The fans boo as The Bloodline screws over Dawkins. Heyman reluctantly holds up the one with them, but Solo isn’t done! He drags Dawkins up, and gives him a SAMOAN SPIKE!! The fans boo more and even Heyman is in shock! Solo and his enforcers head out, will they stop at nothing until they stand atop the WWE?

 

King of the Ring: Randy Orton VS AJ Styles!

We’ve heard from The Viper and The Phenomenal One tonight, and both men are looking for redemption after taking losses at Backlash. They’ve picked themselves up, dusted themselves off and refocused on what’s next, but who is the one taking that next step forward while the other gets left behind?

SmackDown returns and Orton makes his entrance. He signs a fan’s magazine cover before he gets in the ring with Styles. The bell rings and the fans rally for “RANDY! RANDY!” as he circles with Styles. They tie up, Styles waistlocks, but Orton elbows free. Styles kicks low, headlocks, but Orton pulls hair to power up and out. Styles RAMS shoulders with Orton, runs, but Orton UPPERCUTS at the ropes! Orton then runs up to clothesline Styles up and out! The fans fire up and Orton get son the corner to do his pose! The fans are even more fired up, and SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns again and Orton has Styles in a corner to rain down fists! The fans count along as Orton makes sure each one hurts! Orton goes all the way to nine, then brings Styles out to UPPERCUT for TEN! The fans are all fired up and Orton looms over Styles. Orton drags Styles up, scoops, btu Styles slips free to DROPKICK! Styles then runs, SLIDING FOREARM! Orton bails out fast, but Styles talks trash on the fans before going to the apron. SLIDING KNEE! Orton staggers, bumps into the post, and then all the way to the Prime hydration station. Styles storms out after Orton, but Orton kicks low!

Orton lured Styles in, and now he hits a BARRIER BACK SUPLEX! Orton shoves Styles down, then brings him back up. The fans fire up as Orton drags Styles along the barrier, but Styles fights free! Styles ROCKS Orton, then goes up to use the barriers, to jump to the desk! And from desk, to PHENOMENAL- APRON BACK SUPLEX! Then DESK BACK SUPLEX! Orton makes Styles pay for getting cute, and fans want that “ONE MORE TIME!” Orton refreshes the ring count, then he brings Styles up again, for a DESK BACK SUPLEX! Styles sputters, Orton takes a bow, and the fans are thunderous!

Orton puts Styles in the ring, storms in after him, and goes to a corner. But Styles FLAPJACKS Orton off the buckles! Orton staggers back, Styles DROPKICKS the leg! Styles runs to CHOP BLOCK! Orton flounders and goes to ropes. Orton bails out, hobbles around, leans on barriers, but Styles goes out the other side. Styles runs in around the way, and he CHOP BLOCKS at full speed! The fans boo and the ref reprimands but Styles says this is a match, isn’t it? Styles watches Orton writhe while SmackDown goes to break.

SmackDown returns once again and Styles has Orton down in the ring. Styles puts the bad leg on ropes, to HIP DROP on it! And then HIP DROP again! The ref reprimands, the fans boo, but Styles ELBOW DROPS the leg! Orton still grabs at Styles but Styles pushes him down. Styles grabs that bad leg, brings it around to another side of the ring, and he soaks up the heat while standing on the foot. But then Orton BOOTS Styles up and out of the ring! The fans fire up as the ring count starts on Styles. Orton shakes out the bad leg, rolls away to center, and stands up. Styles steps in, Orton KICKS the ropes to jam him up!

Orton has Styles and the fans are thunderous again! But Styles slips free, roll and CALF- NO, Orton slips free to STOMP Styles! Orton hobbles, but he still watches Styles. Styles stands into a LARIAT! And another LARIAT! Orton ducks, but Styles avoids the powerslam and Orton just falls! OKLAHOMA ROLL! TWO, and Orton UPPERCUTS! Styles flops to the apron, the fans rally up, and Orton grits his teeth. Orton forces himself to stand, but Styles also stands on the apron. Orton storms his way over to get Styles back in the ropes! But Styles gets the bad leg! DRAPING DRAGON SCREW! Orton falls back, Styles drags himself back up!

The fans rally for Orton as he stands, but Styles takes aim! Springboard and- NO, Orton trips him up! Styles falls to the mat and goes to a corner. Orton storms over, he drags Styles up, but Styles again wants the leg! Orton holds ropes but Styles powers through! Orton sits up to fight off the Calf Crusher, but Styles still pulls! Orton endures, the fans rally as hard as they can, and he reaches back to hook Styles! Orton can’t push Styles down as Styles pulls on that bad leg! Orton grits his teeth, tries again, and he gets Styles into a headlock! Styles lets go of the leg, slips free of the headlock, but runs into the SNAP POWERSLAM! Cover, TWO!

Styles survives and Orton is frustrated, but Orton won’t stop now. Orton stalks Styles to a corner, drags him up and puts him up top. Orton ROCKS Styles with a right hand, then ROCKS him again! Orton climbs, the fans fire up, but Styles slips out! Styles YANKS Orton down, runs up, but Orton puts Styles in the ropes! DRAPING DDT!! Both men are down and the fans are thunderous again! Orton rises again, and with the Mohegan Sun red hot for him, Orton hears those voices! Styles rises, RK- NO! Styles shoves Orton away, runs up, but is put on the apron! Styles ROCKS Orton, springboards, PHENOMENAL FOREARM!! Cover, ROPEBREAK!!!

Orton survives by his fingertips and Styles cannot believe it! Styles argues with the ref but the ref says ropebreak is ropebreak! Styles drags Orton back up and “This is Awesome!” But the fans also boo as Styles calls his shot! But Orton RKOS!!! Cover, Orton wins!!

Winner: Randy Orton, by pinfall (advances to the next round)

Truly outta nowhere, The Viper strikes and turns things right around! Styles loses again, what must he do to get back on track? As for Orton, he promised to go after Tama Tonga, will he be like Kevin Owens and #JustKeepFighting until he can?


My Thoughts:

 


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Andrew’s TNA iMPACT! Results & Match Ratings: 5.9.2024

Under Siege was straight trash homie…can we salvage some sense coming off a bad PLE?

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Well Under Siege kind of sucked except for the last 2 matches…so I really have no clue what to expect from this episode. We’re apparently kicking off with a System championship celebration party, so this could be slow and cringe or actually interesting. Really only two ways to go with this.

Let’s find out if I’m drinking early tonight.

Ratings:

FBI (Ray Jaz & Zack Clayton w/Little Guido) vs First Class (Rich Swann & AJ Francis): Swann wins via Frog Splash – * 1/2

The Rascalz (Zachary Wentz & Trey Miguel) vs Jake Something & Cody Deaner: Rascalz win Tandem Goomba Stomp/Sit Out – *

Jonathan Gresham vs Will Ferrera: Gresham wins via CephaloPin – Squash

ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey) vs Speedball Mountain (Trent Seven & Speedball Mike Bailey): Speedball Mountain win via Ultima Birminghammer – *** 1/2

 

Results:

So Myers opens up the segment, and the crowd is a bit flat, but both Myers and then Moose start laying in the “greatest faction of all time” stuff, so I guess we’re gonna start to see some cracks soon. But this is a rough promo to open with. The crowd is just barely reacting and having the local minor league team cheerleaders or something come out for their entrance was just awkward. This is all going over like a fart in church.

Lish says she put a video package together, but it gets interrupted by Broken Matt Hardy with a steel chair, and at least the crowd cares a little and Hardy seems to be into the promo a bit. Not as much as Under Siege, but definitely better than when he first came back. OH MY GOD! Lish says people can’t understand Broken Matt because of HIS accent. Okay, that’s a fantastic line. The promo is still kinda flat, but Lish had the line of the exchange so far. Hardy fights them with the chair, does pretty decent until Lish brings out Kendra the Kendo Stick and interferes enough to get the others to use the numbers advantage. But Ryan Nemeth hits the ring and makes the save for Matt. 

The cheerleaders turn on The System and start doing the “Delete” motion. Very…stupid. 

FBI (Ray Jaz & Zack Clayton w/Little Guido) vs First Class (Rich Swann & AJ Francis)

Rich gets thrown around a little early on from Zack, until he goes to the eyes and gives AJ a shot to come in and hit some assisted moves. Zack it draped over the ropes, the referee backs off AJ and Swann takes cheap shots over and over while the referee is distracted. AJ gets too cocky, slowly goes for a corner Splash and misses, but he grabs Zack’s wrist to try and stop the tag. Big car crash Double Lariat leads to a simultaneous tag and Ray Jaz takes the hot tag. A few quick strikes into a Running Backdrop Driver for a near fall. AJ breaks up the pin, Zack tries to even the odds but AJ handles him and chucks him out. Rich Dropkicks Ray into AJ, Chokeslam into the Frog Splash, First Class wins.

Alan Angels stupid talk show is back and he’s flirting with SDL and Kon is still in the mix. This is cringe, awful and I’d rather shoot myself in the head. This sucks. 

The Rascalz (Zachary Wentz & Trey Miguel) vs Jake Something & Cody Deaner

So this is a Tornado Tag now because of Deaner’s stupid “People’s Choice” gimmick. I have lost nearly any desire to care about this match purely because Deaner is a plight on wrestling. Deaner and Something have early control, but I literally don’t care. I’m just waiting for Deaner to screw this up somehow since he’s not likable or charming, and this is painful. I’d rather have a root canal than watch this, and we all know I love Zachary Wentz.

Thankfully Wentz and Trey start to turn things around, but I want to get away from this match faster than Tom Brady left his own roast. We all know that if the Deaner team ever starts to build momentum its because of Jake. I just really want nothing to do with this match. Its trash, its spots for spots sake, spray paint in Jake’s eyes, Double Superkick, into the Rocket Launcher/Super Kick tandem and then Goomba Stomp Sitout Powerbomb for the Rascalz to win. Thank Christ its over.

OH more good news! Maclin comes out and kills The Rascalz on the ramp! 

This Gabby segment is awful. She’s just asking about names, its almost as stupid and irritating as Art Donovan “How much does this guy weigh”.  I usually love the ASH gimmick, but with this moronic Gabby chick, this is awful. Gabby is terrible, baiting the comedy reactions from ASH and Iceman makes their gimmick less charming because being obliviously goofy in serious situations is what makes them great. Not feeding into the comedy. Too much talking in this episode, and by people that shouldn’t be talking. 

Jonathan Gresham vs Will Ferrera

The local jobber doesn’t even look like enhancement talent, he looks like a temp at a run down office. Gresham comes out with a few low kicks, then a Dropkick and a little bit of the Muta flourish as he goes to tie up the jobber Heel Hook, Butterflied Arms behind the calf, and the official starts to cough. The referee coughing distracts Gresham enough to give Ferrera a few spots, but a Asai Moonsault into a Trailer Hitch, Kneecap Smash and then he just stalks his prey. Octopus hold with the ink, hand over Ferrera’s face, CephaloPin.

ABC (Ace Austin & Chris Bey) vs Speedball Mountain (Trent Seven & Speedball Mike Bailey)

So there’s a weird wrinkle to this match, the winning team will face each other in the number one contender match.

Bey and Bailey start off and Bailey catches Bey with a Dropkick, tags in Trent, Chops, Kicks, Trent with the Assisted Corkscrew Senton for a near fall. Trent does his Kojima Chops, Bailey tags in, Poetry in Motion for another near fall. Bey finally finds a tag and they rip off a Tandem Overhead Hammerlock Takeover, near fall, Ace continues to work on Bailey, Snap Suplex, Bey tags in, Low Clothesline for a near fall, Knee to the spine into another cover but only a 1 count. Bailey makes the desperate tag out, Trent comes in with some Chops, Back Elbows and Scoop Spinning Fowsion for 2! Bailey tags back in, some back and forth big attempts, Superplex from Trent, Bailey goes for the Shooting Star Press but hits only the mat! Things spill to the outisde and they’re just throwing chops, Speedball Mountain both miss chops at the same time into the post, ABC try to capitalize.

Bey works over the hand that just crashed into the post, Cross Arm Breaker attempt, Key Lock attempt but Bailey is fighting back. Bailey tries to prevent Bey from tagging in Ace while also trying to protect the hand. Flurry of Kicks out of nowhere! Bey falls back into his own corner so Ace tags in while Speedball is selling fatigue. Bailey Roundhouse Kick miss, Superkick miss cause Ace Matrix dodges, Ace goes for the Spinning Heel Kick but misses, they both go for High Round kicks and connect at the same time. Both sell and then crawl to their corners, simultaneous tags on Trent and Bey. Bey tries the Satellite DDT, Trent stops him, Bey with a Roundhouse Kick, Trent spins the momentum with a Spinning Backfist. Seven Star Lariat attempt, block, Gamengiri into a Cutter for two for ABC! Tandem Ripcord Knees from ABC, into the Brianbuster with the Round Kick, Bailey makes the save at 2! ABC in control, Trent and Bailey try to fight from underneath, Bop and Bang gives them a moment, Ace throws Trent’s backfist into Bailey’s face. Breakdown, Superkick rewinds Ace into the Seven Star Lariat! 1-2-Phenomenal Forearm from Bey sends Bailey falling into the pinfall to break it.

Ace tags in Bey, 1-2-Sweet is called for but Bailey pulls Trent to the side, Dive and Asai Moonsault keep Speedball Mountain alive. Briminghammer/Ultima Weapon attempt, but Ace gets out of the Birminghammer, Bey knocks Bailey off, Ace kicks Trent out, Fosbury Flop from Ace levels both Mountain members. Ace is busy talking shit to Mustafa while Bey is yelling since Ace is legal, they take too long. Tornado Dragon Suplex takes out Bey, Ultima Birminghammer wins!

 

Overall Score: 2.5/10

This was the worst episode I’ve seen since the terrible AEW crossover time. 75% of the show was talking, the segments were cringe, dead or just straight up bad. Gabby LaSpisa has no business on a televised product. I couldn’t care less if she’s part of the Busted Open idiot squad, she can stay in podcast form buried far away from people with personalities. Deaner is worthless, Kon and Angels are both insanely worthless, Jake absorbing a bunch of losses is JUST like his last run with the company. PUSH HIM. He’s got a great look, he’s athletic, yes he needs a better name than “Something” but get Deaner far away from him. I mean the stupidity of this show made me dislike the ASH by Elegance segment, which annoys me since I really love her gimmick.

Only good things were we’re seeing some kind of return/repackage of Giselle Shaw and the main event was decent even though they’re really being heavy handed with the ABC breaking up thing. The fear a bunch of us had after Scott left was just watching a ton of factions and teams fall apart…and that’s happened. MCMG are gone, Dango hasn’t been seen in like a month, ABC is on the way out, Kevin Knight hasn’t been around with Kushida so I guess they aren’t a thing in TNA anymore. Ugh…and I am not looking forward to the 16 person clusterfuck next week.

I’m going to be purchasing a lot of alcohol before next week. This was unabashed garbage.


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