Results
Mitchell’s WWE SmackDown Results & Report! (8/13/21)
The Summer of Cena continues!
The Tribal Chief looks to confront John Cena!
After swiping the Universal Championship opportunity from Finn Balor then being away a week, JOHN CENA returns to SmackDown, and Roman’s looking for him!
OFFICIAL RESULTS
- WWE Intercontinental Championship: Apollo Crews w/ Azeez VS Shinsuke Nakamura w/ Rick Boogs; Nakamura wins and becomes the new WWE Intercontinental Champion.
- The Street Profits VS The Alpha Academy; The Street Profits win.
- The Mysterios VS The Dirty Dawgs; The Mysterios win.
- $1000 or No More Begging: Kevin Owens VS Baron Corbin; Kevin wins and Corbin MUST STOP begging.
PLAY BY PLAY
JOHN CENA is here!
He says it’s “A very important night tonight!” and goes to the ring. And he welcomes Tulsa to SmackDown! The contract was signed, sealed and delivered, the match is ON for SummerSlam! Schools are back up and running, too, so this is a great occasion to give Roman Reigns his report card. Cena says Roman is a D. And below average, too. D-Head, D-Bag, and above a D-isappointment. Because for TEN YEARS, the WWE has been selling the fans Roman. And judging by the numbers, the only one buying it is Roman Reigns. That’s why Cena’s back, with a very specific agenda. Cena is gonna give Roman an F. That is to say, at SummerSlam, Roman Reigns gets an F from John Cena.
But… Cena wants to hear what Tulsa feels about this. Tulsa seems pretty fired up hearing this. Cena has a pop quiz and the fans start chanting, “CENA! CENA!” Well, what a lively class! So here’s the question: “Do you think Roman Reigns will beat the hell out of me at SummerSlam?” Fans mostly boo. Okay, now, class, this is your chance to stand up and be heard. Do you think Roman Reigns will beat the hell out of Cena at SummerSlam? They boo even harder! Cena does still have his doctorate in Thugonomics, so here’s the answer to the question: Roman Reigns will beat the hell out of me at SummerSlam; but Cena also knows Roman will still lose and there’s nothing he can do about it!
But speaking of, here comes the Tribal Chief! The WWE Universal Champion takes his time walking out with Paul Heyman in toe. The title is handed over, Roman holds it up, and here’s the pyro! Roman takes his time going to the ring, so SmackDown takes a break.
SmackDown returns as Roman finally enters the ring. He holds the belt up again, and more pyro goes off. Fans chant, “Roman Sucks!” and Cena says here he is, pyro, Paul and all, ROMAN REIGNS! This is a lively bunch tonight, so thanks for joining them. Heyman hands Roman the mic and he tells Cena not to waste time and just get to it. Cena says he’s not wasting time, but he will wait for one week from tomorrow to embarrass Roman on the “biggest stage of them all.” Fans cheer and Roman just asks, “Is that it? That’s all you got?” Cena says, “Roman, that’s all I need.” When he looks in Roman’s eyes [a KFox14 flash flood warning gets in the way here] and fans agree.
Cena continues to say Roman thinks we all have to play by his rules. And that this is his company. Everybody knows it belongs to the fans. Yes, Roman wants to throw up in his mouth thinking about that because he’s “so far above” everyone else. That’s why Cena’s back. He’s the only one who can shut Roman up. See, the WWE has been pushing Roman for a decade now, failure after failure, after failure, and Roman is still here “because you’re the best chance they got.” Roman built such a layer of protection over himself that no other WWE superstar even has a chance in there with him.
But this is where Cena comes in. They asked Cena to come back, because Roman needs a big ol’ piece of humble pie and he’s gonna get one when Cena beats Roman’s ass at SummerSlam. Fans cheer big for that one! Cena wants Roman to see that the fans know. It’s starting to build! There’s one week left to choose: Team Reigns (which gets lots of boos), or Team Cena (which gets lots of cheers). Well, seems Tulsa has chosen. Roman’s table seems pretty small right now, huh? SummerSlam is gonna be history, count on that! Roman wants to talk but fans chant for Cena. Cena said this was their show, didn’t he?
Roman says he thought there’d be something original and fresh, but instead Cena makes D jokes, penis jokes, all the same stuff about beating his ass. This is all stuff we heard before. Where’s something good? Hit Roman with the good stuff. Cena will. He won’t beat Roman’s ass. Roman’s gonna beat Cena’s ass. Yes, real good stuff. Spear after Spear, big strong punch named for that DC Comics superhero, and another one. Hypeman Slimey in the corner, holding up the title-aka Paul Heyman-and Roman will be kicking Cena’s ass at SummerSlam! Cena doesn’t need to prove himself to Roman, though. That’s what is so historic about this. Cena just needs to pin Roman, 1-2-3.
See, if Cena can hold onto a world title just one more time, that’d make it 17 times for Cena. Fans like the sound of that! And then in the halls of immortal achievement, that’d make Cena the most decorated champion of all-time. That match would make history! All Cena needs to do is 1-2-3. As fun as that would be, it’s really all about Roman. Cena is here to help Roman. That’s how good Cena is, huh? Heyman jokingly suggests he say, “Thank you.” He’s here to help Roman, the Tribal Chief, the Head of the Table. But Roman isn’t like Cena. He isn’t going to bury his opponent then go say he’ll out there and beat a bum, no.
Roman respects Cena and is sophisticated about this. This is compelling story telling here. This is JOHN CENA, arguably the greatest of all time! “Underappreciated, not enough respect on this man’s name.” Cena’s done things that nobody’s done before. Fans start to “WHAT?!” Roman here as he says Cena is almost a 17-time world heavyweight champion, and nobody else can say that! That is incredible! Cena is the best, Mount Rushmore of the WWE, all the spots. Roman’s just proud to say that he could beat John Cena, that’s how good Cena is! Even good enough to juggle Hollywood and WWE at the same time! Wow! There’s not enough time here to promote all Cena’s movies!
Wait, doesn’t he have like four movies out right now? Cena’s good. His career says so, it’s on the wall. Cena’s good enough to be in this ring and verbally joust with anybody, that’s not Roman’s game. Cena’s good enough to main event SummerSlam with the Tribal Chief. Cena’s so good enough to… To win the WWE Championship. But not good enough to win the Universal Championship. And see, John, 20+ years of missionary might’ve been good enough for Cena, but it wasn’t good enough for Nikki Bella. Ooooof! Roman will smash Cena, retain the title, pack Cena up on a private jet and send him back to Hollywood. But Cena should enjoy this.
Roman wants Tulsa to know, this might be the last time we ever get to see John Cena again. OOOH! So take this home, “kid.” No problem! If Roman wants a compelling story, and to hypocritically criticize Cena for being in Hollywood and (is there a mute censor problem here or something?) but Roman hasn’t been embarrassed. He’s been protected! The pretty face, the giant bars of soap for teeth, and the Shield. Roman almost ruined Seth Rollins, ran Dean Ambrose out of the WWE- OH!! And then 10 whole years, FIVE Mania main events, Heyman in the corner, two lackeys to do his dirty work, the protection of the system, and it still isn’t working! Roman needs to be embarrassed!
Fans want a compelling story at SummerSlam, right? YES! They want to be on the edge of their seats, wanting to know what will happen! SummerSlam will be compelling, and Cena will go to a Hollywood movie set, and Roman will smash Cena, but Heyman knows better than anybody how much punishment Cena can take, and never quit. Cena’s been against the odds his whole life, he helped build Suplex City, and he just needs to hang in there 1-2-3, and Roman is again the biggest failure in WWE history. Roman has to shine! Roman has to smash, and bash and overachieve while Cena just needs 1-2-3.
Roman is then the answer to a trivia question: Who did John Cena beat to become 17 time champion? WA WA WAA! Roman will show up all full of himself and put on one hell of a show, but Cena will hang in there for 1-2-3. Then Cena will take that title, jump the barricade and run out of the Allegiant Stadium as fast as he can, and might even blow Roman a kiss good-bye. This is what Roman doesn’t get yet, though: it is inevitable. No one can protect Roman anymore. At SummerSlam, the champ… is GONE. 1-2-3. Mic drop. Roman smirks and the fans cheer as Cena takes his leave. Roman still holds up the title, but is his reign just a week away from ending?
Nakamura and Boogs rock out backstage.
They’re getting ready as King Shinsuke is getting ready to take on the Pride of Nigeria! Will the King of Strong Style regain that title and add it to his golden collection?
WWE Intercontinental Championship: Apollo Crews w/ Azeez VS Shinsuke Nakamura w/ Rick Boogs!
SmackDown returns as Nakamura makes his entrance. The introductions are made, the belt is raised, and a king sees if he can dethrone a prince in Oklahoma!
Apollo and Nakamura circle, tie up, and Apollo kicks and CLUBS Nakamura down. Apollo snap suplexes, covers, ONE! Apollo gets Nakamura by his hair, whips to ropes but Nakamura ducks, dodges and DYNAMIC DROPKICKS! Nakamura goes to the corner to give Apollo GOOD VIBRATIONS~! Fans are fired up for Nakamura as he snapmares Apollo and drops a knee! Cover, TWO! Azeez gets on the apron but Nakamura kicks at him. Azeez gets away, Nakamura turns around into Apollo’s dropkick! Apollo gets Nakamura up, whips him to ropes and then elbows him down! Apollo paces, Azeez smirks and fans rally up.
Apollo sits Nakamura up to ROCK him with a right. Nakamura throws body shots, Apollo CLUBS him down, then Apollo drags Nakamura up to whip to a corner. Apollo runs in but into a knee! Nakamura puts Apollo up for the TOP SHELF KNEE! Then Nakamura positions Apollo and climbs up top. Apollo throws body shots, then headbutts Nakamura down! Apollo gets up but Boogs rocks out! Fans like that but Apollo doesn’t. The ref reprimands and Boogs acts like he doesn’t know what’s going on. The ref EJECTS Boogs?! And in this distraction, Azeez tries to sneak in, but he’s too big to be stealthy! The ref sees him and EJECTS him, too!! At least now it’s fair again as SmackDown goes to break!
SmackDown returns as Nakamura covers, TWO! The fans are fired up as Nakamura goes to a corner and climbs up. Fans fire up as he climbs, but Apollo ENZIGURIS Nakamura first! Apollo gets Nakamura up, climbs up, brings Nakamura to the top, but Nakamura resists! Apollo powers through to SUPERPLEX Nakamura! Apollo crawls to a cover, TWO!! Nakamura survives and fans are fired up! Apollo gets up and drags Nakamura up, but Nakamura gives a strike fest! Apollo avoids the ax kick, kicks low and reels Nakamura in for a POWERBOMB! High stack, TWO but into a SIT-OUT BOMB!! Cover, TWO!! Fans are fired up even more but Apollo is furious!
Apollo drags Nakamura to a drop zone, goes up top, FROG SPLASH onto knees! Fans fire up again as both men are down! Nakamura aims from a corner, “YAO~!” But Apollo ENZIGURIS Nakamura first, then rolls him up, with the ropes?! Cover, the ref notices just as Nakamura kicks out! The ref reprimands Apollo, Apollo says it doesn’t matter anyway since Nakamura kicked out. Apollo GERMAN SUPLEXES Nakamura, covers, TWO!! Nakamura survives again and Apollo is seething. Apollo stands up, wants Nakamura to get up, and Nakamura slowly rises. Apollo OLYMPIC- Nakamura arm-drags out of the slam! Apollo ducks one kick but not the WHEEL KICK!
Apollo staggers, Nakamura fireman’s carries to an AVALANCHE DRIVER! Cover, TWO!! Apollo survives but Nakamura is right on him with an INVERTED EXPLODER! Fans fire up again as Nakamura goes to a corner and aims… KINSHASA!!! Cover, Nakamura wins!!
Winner: Shinsuke Nakamura, by pinfall (NEW WWE Intercontinental Champion)
Now king AND champion, he holds the belt up high with pyro going off, and Boogs is back to rock out along with his king! Oh and Pat McAfee gets in on it, too. Will this second time with the title be even bigger than the first?
The Street Profits talk backstage.
Kayla Braxton walks up and asks Montez Ford about the recap package just shown, recapping how his ribs were injured by Otis’ massive splash. Is there any concern going into tonight’s match that Otis will do the same or even worse? Oh, Kayla. Last time Ford and Otis fought, it was one of the most painful experiences of Ford’s life. Laying in bed, ribs on fire, not being able to sleep or laugh. Do you know how dark life is when you can’t even laugh, for two months? Ford was laying in bed, he had one thing in mind: “When I get on these toes, I’m gonna throw these balls.” Now that he’s recuperated, rejuvenated, rehabilitated, Ford ain’t concerned. He’s EXCITED.
Dawkins says Ford is more than just his tag partner. They’re brothers, family. Dawkins hope the Alpha Academy enjoyed their time, because now with Tez fully healed, the Street Profits are once again up! AND WE WANT THE SMOKE!! The music plays and we’re about to get one fired up grudge match!
The Street Profits VS The Alpha Academy!
We just heard from Tez and Dawks, but now it’s time for actions to speak louder than words! Will Chad Gable & Otis regret ever thinking there was something they could help the Profits with?
SmackDown returns as Gable & Otis make their entrance. The teams sort out and Ford starts with Gable. They circle and tie up. They go around, Ford wrenches to a wristlock, Gable spins through to wrench back and wristlock. Ford rolls, handsprings, wrenches and wristlocks. Gable drops to a knee, rolls, bridges, then handsprings to slips through and back drop to an armlock. Ford moves around but Gable digs a knee into Ford’s shoulder. Ford headscissors to bring Gable down but Gable kips free. Gable headlocks, spins to a headlock then a drop toehold. Gable has a mounted chicken wing and hopes Otis is taking notes.
Ford gets up, Gable whips him to a corner but Ford goes up and over and shows off that agility! Fans fire up as Ford eggs Gable on. Gable runs in but into an arm-drag. Gable gives it back, Ford steps up and around to roll up, ONE! Gable hurries to get a leg, ankle pick but no lock as Ford stands. Ford flips back and ENZIGURIS Gable! Gable staggers all the way to his corner and Otis tags in! Ford fires himself up as Otis approaches. Dropkick! Otis stays up so Ford mule kicks, front kicks, but Otis shoves him. Dawks tags in, but Otis POP-UP STRONGEST SLAMS Ford?! Dawkins dodges, returns and back elbows!
Otis staggers, Dawkins CYCLONE SPLASHES but Otis denies the bulldog! Otis then hauls Dawkins up for a FALL AWAY SLAM! Otis gets up as Gable shouts, “For the Academy!” Gable tells Otis what to do, and Otis RAMS into Dawkins in the corner. Gable tags in, he gets Dawkins with more shoulders, then Otis tags in again. Otis rams his shoulder in again and again, then Gable tags in. Gable rams in again and again, then Otis tags in! Gable holds a towel in front of Dawkins to say “TORO! TORO!” Otis runs in and RAMS into Dawkins! Gable pats Otis on the shoulder and tells him Otis is his number one guy, but the ref also says that counts as a tag!
Gable argues with the ref, but the ref tells Gable to get in. Gable tries to explain but Dawkins RAMS Gable into Otis! Dawkins has Gable while Ford FLIES OUTTA NOWHERE! Direct hit on Otis and yet Otis only leans over into the announce desk! But Dawkins hits the CASH OUT! Cover, the Profits win!
Winners: The Street Profits, by pinfall
But Otis TOSSES Ford into the barriers and then rushes into the ring! Dawkins gets out, regroups with Ford, and The Dozer can only seethe! Is the Payback Season only starting #ForTheAcademy?
Seth Rollins rants at production.
He knows they know what he needs, so why are they just staring at him for? Do your jobs, guys, get this done! But what is it Rollins is even talking about? We’ll see, after the break.
SmackDown returns and Rollins goes to the ring!
The Architect’s drip has reached a new level but that’s not really the point. He revels in his own song as well as the various reactions from the fans before he gets the mic. “Yes! Tulsa, you have been on fire tonight!” But Rollins hates to play the role of “party-pooper,” but his sources have told him that Edge will not be here tonight. Hey, now, c’mon. He’s just as disappointed as they are, because he’d love nothing more than to put his fist in Edge’s face for all the “misinformation” and lies that Edge spread about Rollins last week! Fans chant, “WE WANT EDGE!” and Rollins explains he wants Edge, too. But according to Edge, you’ve got the next best thing in “Edge Lite,” Seth Rollins.
Rollins says Edge had the nerve to say Rollins is “Edge Lite.” “If that is not the most narcissistic, egotistical thing” Rollins has ever heard, but it makes perfect sense! Because Edge is a Hall of Famer, he’s done EVERYTHING there is to do in the WWE, and he can’t stand that [another Flash Flood Warning from KFox 14] Rollins’ resume is better than his, and that everything Edge has done, Rollins has just done better. Hey, this isn’t just Rollins’ opinion, there is verifiable, documented video proof! Rollins has taken the liberty of putting together a “career retrospective” of Rollins and Edge, to show you the truth. Roll the footage.
The Rollins-Edge comparison video package begins. “Over his storied career, Edge has led the blueprint for a legendary career. But the Architect has improved upon it at every step, blazing a trail to even greater heights. When Edge arrived in the WWE, he began his career as a member of infamous factions and achieved a modicum of success. But when Seth Rollins burst onto the scene, he led The Shield, the most dominant faction in WWE history.” The commentary snippets are of course to put The Shield over, but also to make it seem like Rollins was in charge, while showing the many times Rollins did something big as a member of the trio.
“Edge made history as the first to cash-in his Money in the Bank Briefcase on the WWE Championship. But that footnote has been forgotten compared to Seth Rollins’ glorious cash-in at WrestleMania 31, The Heist of the Century. Edge has won two Royal Rumbles, including this past year’s, only to fall short at WrestleMania (37). But after Seth Rollins’ 2019 Royal Rumble victory, who could ever forget the epic moment when Seth Rollins became The Beastslayer.” This was also the moment Rollins became a WWE Grand Slam Champion.
Yes, Edge may claim to have done it all first in the WWE, but when it comes to Seth Rollins, Edge will always be beneath him. “I don’t need to be you, because I am better than you.” We return to reality- er, the present, and Rollins sees no likes. The footage doesn’t lie, but the fans say, “YOU SUCK!” Rollins wants to share that as he was watching the video, he had a bit of a revelation. Hear him out. Rollins realized that Edge should be thanking Rollins! Not just Edge, but all of the fans should be thanking him. Hear him out, listen! If Rollins had stomped Edge back in 2014, we wouldn’t even be having this conversation!
This, this uh… Dream Match, at SummerSlam, Edge VS SETH FREAKIN’ ROLLINS, wouldn’t even be on the table. All of those moments, from Edge’s epic comeback at the Royal Rumbles, the main event at Mania, none of that would’ve happened back in 2014! Edge’s acting career? POOF, gone. Edge wouldn’t be able to even push his little girls on their little swing set at home “because THEY’D be pushing him in a damn wheelchair!!” Rollins takes a moment to think while fans continue to say, “WE WANT EDGE! WE WANT EDGE!” Rollins tells them no, Edge has pushed Rollins too far. Rollins is saying things he doesn’t want to say and thinking things he shouldn’t think.
Rollins says Edge is making Rollins into a person he doesn’t want to be. But Edge has been the guy between Rollins and the Universal Championship too many times. That is compromising Rollins’ future and the future of Rollins’ family. He wants the camera to come in close. “Edge, this… This is not 2014 anymore. Times have changed, I’ve changed, and at SummerSlam, I will not hesitate. I will not hold back. I will… stomp your head… into this mat… And if that puts you out for good… Then so be it.” The fans boo at those horrible and horrifying words. But will the Savior of SmackDown go to a place that is more than just Rated R to win?
Rey and Dominik Mysterio talk backstage.
Father reminds son that they’re going for the SmackDown Tag Team titles, but getting back up from Dominik’s loss is making this harder. Dom nods as Rey tells him no more mistakes. Dom says for sure, and he’s not even worried. They won the first time to get the titles, they have the Usos’ number! Rey wants his son to understand, you can’t have that mentality. Stay humble and hungry, especially after a loss. No overconfidence. Just do it for Rey, okay? Let’s go and take care of business. That’s the Mysterio way. Dom says he’s got this, and the Mysterios head to the ring!
The Mysterios VS The Dirty Dawgs!
While Rey & Dom are getting their title shot at SummerSlam, the Show-Off & GLORIOUS One will surely want to ruin things for them here tonight. Will Dolph Ziggler & Robert Roode make sure the lucha libre familia fails big time?
SmackDown returns as the Dawgs make their entrance. Rey wants Dom to watch closely as he starts with Roode. The bell rings and Roode kicks Rey right in the stomach! Roode bumps Rey off buckles, throws body shots then whips corner to corner. Roode runs in but into a boot! Rey runs to tilt-o-whirl headscissor Roode down! Ziggler creeps in but Rey runs him over. Rey turns around into a tilt-o-whirl BACKBREAKER! Roode boots Rey down, catches his breath, then gets Rey in a corner. Roode whips Rey corner to corner, tags Ziggler then whips Ziggler in for the SPLASH! Ziggler feeds Rey to the atomic drop, SHOTGUN BOOT RUSSIAN LEG SWEEP! Cover, TWO!
Ziggler stays between father and son then wraps on a chinlock. “You ain’t going nowhere!” Ziggler thrashes Rey around as the fans and Dom rally up. Rey fights up, Roode gets in so the ref won’t see Ziggler dig fingers into Rey’s eyes! Ziggler puts Rey in the corner, Roode tags in, and Roode stomps Rey. Roode hoists Rey up top, throws hands, then tags Ziggler. Rey kicks Roode, fires off hands on Ziggler then adjusts to FLYING SEATED SENTON! Hot tag to Dom and he goes up to CROSSBODY! Fans fire up as Dom dodges to NECKBREAKER! Dom DECKS Roode, blocks the superkick from Ziggler to roll him, TWO! FAMOUSER! Cover, TWO!
Ziggler drags Dom up, whips him to ropes but Dom kicks back. Ziggler blocks that kick but Dom ENZIGURIS! The Usos are on the tron! Jimmy & Jey talk trash and do sarcastic commentary to distract Dom. “Go~ Dom, Go~!” Rey tells Dom to ignore that and Roode tags in. Rey sees it, gets Dom out of the way, and Roode hits buckles! Rey says Dom needs to pay attention! Roode DECKS Rey, Dom victory rolls Roode, the Mysterios win!
Winners: Rey & Dominik Mysterio, by pinfall
Now that is some veteran savvy beyond Dom’s years! He refocused quickly and quickly got the win! The Usos still taunt the Mysterios, saying that win must’ve felt real good. But in one week, they’re stepping inside the ring with the SEVEN TIME TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS, the Usos! See you there, Uce. Nos vemos at SummerSlam! Rey and Dom encourage each other that they’re going to get those belts back. Will the Mysterios hit the jackpot in Vegas?
Baron Corbin walks out on stage.
Fans boo as the even more disheveled Lone Wolf walks by and he just can’t understand why. Apparently this will be Baron Corbin’s “last plea” for help, after the break.
SmackDown returns and Corbin has made it to the ring. He has a mic and says, “As all of you may already know, I’ve really been down on my luck lately. The sad part is, it’s so much worse than that. If things don’t turn around quickly, I’m gonna have to file… bankruptcy.” Fans jeer and there’s a set of signs in the crowd that read: “Corbin stole my lunch money,” “Corbin owes me $20,” and “Hey Corbin, you left your tent in our backyard!” Corbin says that this is what’s wrong with society today. When someone like Corbin falls, they want to keep that person down, don’t they? So this is why this is his last public plea to any of the fans.
Look, Corbin is used to a very certain way of life, so he really needs each and everyone here to contribute a minimum of $1000. WHAT?! Now he’ll make it very easy: He has a credit card scanner attachment for his phone. McAfee asks, “How the hell did this bum get a credit card scanner?” But here comes Kevin Owens! The fans are fired up for the Prizefighter and Corbin says Kevin has to be here for the right reasons: to contribute. Now, this may not work with Canadian credit cards, but- Kevin stops Corbin there and says he’s NOT here to help. Kevin’s here to say Corbin needs to STOP begging people for money and embarrassing himself.
Kevin reminds Corbin of how he tried to help Corbin a few weeks ago, because Kevin thought Corbin was more like Kevin. Kevin thought Corbin was someone who made mistakes in the past and was learning from them, but he’s not. This is that Corbin is just trying to use sympathy to his advantage. Just look the last few weeks: Ruining Finn Balor’s title contract signing just so Corbin could get the high paying championship match; oh and then on Monday Night Raw, when Drew McIntyre seemed kinda sorta interested in trying to help, Corbin asked for $100,000! Who begs for a HUNDRED THOUSAND? Someone who NEEDS a hundred thousand!
Corbin asks Kevin for his spare change. For that matter, Corbin isn’t leaving this arena until Kevin gives him a minimum of $1000. Kevin says “Y’know what? I will give you $1000! Should I give him $1000?” The fans say NO so Kevin will give him $1000. But to do that, Corbin just has to beat him in a match RIGHT NOW. You win the match, you get 1000 bucks. But one more thing, if Corbin loses, this all stops now. No more begging people for help, no more embarrassing the WWE by constantly the WWE Universe for help, and Corbin helps himself. What’s Corbin say? Corbin thinks it over and fans chant “YES! YES!”
Corbin agrees but he wouldn’t be in this situation if Kevin wasn’t such *finger poke* a *finger poke* cheap *finger poke* piece *finger poke* of- STUNNER! Kevin and the fans are fired up, and he’s already got Corbin in the red! Will the match still happen now?
Sasha Banks swaggers around backstage.
The Boss is ready for the contract signing to make her WrestleMania rematch at SummerSlam official! Will she and the EST be able to keep things peaceful tonight?
$1000 or No More Begging: Kevin Owens VS Baron Corbin!
Corbin is finally back on his feet, in the literal sense, but he’s still sputtering. Kevin dares him to get back in the ring for their high stakes bet! Will the Lone Wolf get $1000 the hard way? Find out, after the break.
SmackDown return and the bell rings. Corbin wants more time, his neck is still bothering him from the Stunner. But that’s to lull Kevin into a false sense of security! Corbin rolls Kevin up, ONE, and Kevin throws forearms! And CHOPS! And CHOPS! Kevin brings Corbin around but Corbin turns suplex into cradle! TWO, and Kevin kicks Corbin to CLUB him down. Kevin CHOPS, then he reels Corbin for a short arm clothesline! BACK SENTON! Cover, ONE! Corbin sits up but Kevin looms over him. Kevin bumps Corbin off buckles, CHOPS him, then CHOPS him again. Kevin asks the ref hold on a moment with the count, then DECKS Corbin.
Kevin whips Corbin corner to corner but Corbin reverses. Corbin runs in, slides out, slides in but into a SUPERKICK! Corbin is in the corner, Kevin CANNONBALLS! Cover, TWO! Kevin gets to the corner, climbs up, but Corbin choke grips Kevin! Kevin throws hands, bumps Corbin off buckles then rock shim. Kevin slingshots into a BIG right hand! Corbin wants the count out and Kevin stands at 5 to get in at 6! Corbin throws hands, stomps Kevin down, then rains down fists. Corbin covers but he’s in the ropes. Corbin adjusts, ONE! Corbin and the ref argue, Kevin CHOPS Corbin! And CHOPS! But Corbin ROCKS Kevin and Kevin flounders in the ropes.
Corbin goes out to the apron and kicks Kevin low. Corbin reels Kevin in, but Kevin blocks the suplex. Kevin throws body shots, suplexes but Corbin blocks. They brawl, Kevin ROCKS Corbin then reels him in, but Corbin resists to back drop Kevin on the apron! Kevin writhes and Corbin wants a count out but SmackDown goes to break!
SmackDown returns and Kevin climbs a corner while Corbin pushes himself up. Corbin ROCKS Kevin at the top, then climbs up to join him. Corbin gets Kevin up but Kevin resists the superplex. Kevin throws body shots, then headbutts! Corbin falls down into the drop zone, SWANTON BOMB! Cover, TWO! The fans rally and Kevin stands back up. Kevin drags Corbin up, whips him to ropes, but Corbin holds ropes and boots back. Corbin shoves Kevin to ropes but Kevin bucks the O’Conner Roll. Kevin runs in as Corbin rolls back to his feet, choke grip to CHOKE SLAM! Cover, TWO!! Kevin survives and Corbin is losing his cool.
Corbin drags Kevin up, reels him in but Kevin throws forearms first! Kevin HEADBUTTS, runs, but into a DEEP SIX! Cover, TWO!! Still no big money but Corbin tries again, TWO! Double leg cover, TWO!! Corbin is beside himself with and he gets to a corner. Corbin runs corner to corner, slides out then in as Kevin evades, but is ready for the Superkick this time! Corbin POSTS Kevin, roll up with ropes, TWO!! Corbin is upset about the count but that was a fair count. Kevin dodges to kick, but Corbin shoves the Stunner away. Kevin dodges again, sunset flips, Kevin wins!
Winner: Kevin Owens, by pinfall (Corbin MUST stop begging)
As if the Lone Wolf couldn’t feel any lower! Though this was deserved. And so is this STUNNER! Kevin doubles down on Corbin and fans are fired up for the Prizefighter! Will Corbin
Big E helps Bianca Belair practice her signature.
The board has an example of her name, “Bianca,” and she recreates it letter for letter, trying to make hers match up as bEST she can. Will her signature be the cleanEST on the contract?
Backstage interview with Baron Corbin.
Kayla asks him, “So what now?” He can’t even say anything, but then he spots someone. It’s Big E! And while Big E is distracted, Corbin SNATCHES THE MITB BRIEFCASE!! Corbin just got the golden ticket, but will Big E hunt him down and get the briefcase back?
Sonya Deville presides over the SmackDown Women’s Championship contract signing.
“When Bianca Belair faced off with Sasha Banks in the main event of WrestleMania, they made history! And when Bianca defeated Sasha in one of the greatest matches that I’ve ever seen, they made memories that would last a lifetime. And once this contract is signed, Sasha Banks is officially gonna get her championship rematch at SummerSlam!” And with all that said, please welcome the challenger, the Blueprint, the Standard, the Legit Boss, Sasha Banks! Sasha makes her way to the ring, then Sonya introduces the SmackDown Women’s Champion, the EST of the WWE, Bianca Belair! Bianca makes her entrance while Sasha scoffs and rolls her eyes.
Bianca takes her seat now and Sonya presents the contract. Bianca says, “Sasha girl, you ready? Or are you gonna run away again? Or, should I turn my back so you can Backstab me again?” Look at her rolling her eyes. Sasha’s still petty, still jealous, but Bianca should’ve known better. Bianca should’ve known Sasha would do that. “But gurrrl… If you wanted your WrestleMania rematch, all you had to do was ask.” Sasha repeats “Ask?” Bianca, you only won by using that “stank braid” against Sasha! Then there was literally a scar that kept her away for months. And yet Bianca’s out here, expecting them to be friends? “Get real, B*TCH!”
Sasha and Bianca start arguing and Sonya tells them to stop! They are not doing this again! Contract signings are going haywire lately, so both of them just need to sign the contract now. Bianca dares Sasha to sign it. Sasha has Bianca give her some space and then takes the pen to… tease signing. “Hold up, wait, wait, wait.” Before Sasha signs it, she needs some “witnesses.” Carmella and Zelina Vega both head to the ring! Despite things last week, it seems these three are all in this together since it’s about being against Bianca. The rookie didn’t see that coming, did she? Sasha is always two steps ahead. Sasha quickly signs her name, and Bianca gets impatient.
Bianca gets a pen, signs her part, and then she throws the contract at Sasha! Bianca’s ready for the other two, too, and she DECKS Vega and THROWS the arm chair! Mella dodges, and Bianca handspring seated sentons onto Sasha! Bianca rains down fists and forearms, Mella grabs at her but Bianca DECKS her! Vega returns but Bianca bumps her off buckles then stomps a mudhole in! Mella goes after Bianca again but Bianca throws her right out! But Sasha hits a BACKSTABBER! Sasha hammers Bianca, Vega and Mella join in, and Sasha has them let off so she can finish this. Sasha drags Bianca back up to SMACK off the table, then drag her out by her ponytail, to KNEE her face!
Speaking of face, Sasha dribbles Bianca’s face off the SmackDown Women’s Championship itself over and over again! Sasha takes the belt and holds it up high, as she stands on the table and over Bianca. Then Sasha uses Bianca’s own braided ponytail in the Bank Statement! “See you at SummerSlam!” Sasha laughs as she keeps torturing the EST in perhaps the nastiEST form of the crossface yet! SmackDown fades out before anyone stops Sasha, will Bianca be passing out off the air?
My Thoughts:
A very good SmackDown, though it seemed like this was already the go-home episode for SummerSlam. The contract signing, for one, had a good closing shot just now, and you can bet Sasha will “try” to recreate this for the title match only to have that be why she fails. And the fact Vega and Mella were willing to work with Sasha was a decent surprise. Enemy of my enemy is my friend type stuff, and they could probably kayfabe it as Sasha promising each of them a title match after SummerSlam.
Kevin VS Corbin was a really good match, and so I suppose it worked out for the “main event match.” I almost feel like Corbin could’ve won this one since it’d be kayfabe money anyway, and then he starts literally fighting people for money for a few weeks. But I suppose it is becoming his thing to be the “contract swiper” since he stole Big E’s MITB briefcase. Big E VS Corbin, a match for the briefcase, is a bit Miz VS Otis from last year, but hopefully Big E gets the briefcase back and keeps it. Also I’m realizing that Corbin’s character is based on those stories you hear about the ungrateful beggars where they feel someone refusing their insane request is offensive.
I like that there’s this tension slowly building between Rey and Dom in their promos. I am still hoping, though they missed the window in their feud with Corbin, that Dom is becoming more his Guerrero side than his Mysterio side. The Mysterios still win off the Dawgs to get momentum for facing the Usos, but the Usos had a good promo in their attempt to distract as well as hyping up the match. That tag title match could go either way, and I’m thinking the Usos win in a way that pushes Rey and Dom to the point where Dominik Guerrero emerges to again put a positive spin on the “Who’s Your Papi?” story from years ago.
The Profits VS The Academy was really good and it was a great win for the Profits to get now that they’re back up as a tag team. I’m sure the Profits will be waiting on the other side of SummerSlam to take on the Usos. The match with the biggest impact tonight was the Intercontinental Championship match. Nakamura VS Apollo was very good, and was oddly the opener but I suppose it was to make sure they got it in before all the other segments that needed room to breathe. Nakamura winning this title on a SmackDown is a great move just on the surprise, and I can’t wait to see what champion #Kingsuke and Boogs will do now.
Seth Rollins had a great promo and vignette to give both a heavily biased comparison of himself and Edge, and to sound incredibly scary at the same time. Edge VS Rollins has already been a highly anticipated match, this made it even higher than that. And of course, the first segment being a promo battle of Roman and Cena, of course we were going to get great stuff. Roman’s improved but Cena is still Cena and he did a great job showing that he didn’t even need to take digs at Roman. In a clever move, he didn’t attempt to bury Roman since Roman (and a lot of Cena’s past feud opponents) claimed that’s all Cena does. Cena was just stating fact over and over in such a way that it was to get on Roman’s nerves. And even though he laughed it off, Roman surely got annoyed by it.
Cena had that great line in reference to CM Punk, but I guess there was something about “dipshit” blah blah blah that wasn’t appropriate and got muted? I went over it a few times to make sure it wasn’t KFox or my own hearing. And unfortunately, just the timing of El Paso facing insane levels of flooding in the streets, the news did in fact have to post those warnings, I just wish there was a way I could’ve still heard those lines that got covered up.
My Score: 8.5/10
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